LOs angELEs

WEEK OF May 7, 2009 los angeles edition Vol 1 no 14

sPheres of influence

by Will Campbell | 4/25/09 | Los angeles Metblogs tpburl.com/g3xw20

It’s become something of an annual tradition these last few years for me one afternoon

each spring to detour on my bike commute home to the Exposition Park Rose Garden and

wander in the waning light of day along and among the multitudes and varieties of blooms —

at least until the security patrol cruises by and gets on his PA to tell me to get out because for

some grade-A WTF? the rose garden is only open until 5:30 p.m. Why the hell that place isn’t

open and accessible until sunset I have no idea.

As usual before getting the boot I pixelized some of the flora, the snaps of which are

available for viewing here at my Flickr photoset, but the bonus that I found on the garden’s

promenade is what I’m more interested in sharing with you (slightly biggifiable if clicked or

view the set here on Flickr):

It’s a free exhibition that debuted on Earth Day this past week called Cool Globes, and it

features some 32 spheres measuring five feet in diameter remarkably transformed with a variety

of materials by a range of artists as well as school kids to create awareness about global warming.

“Cool Globes” will be in place at Exposition Park through July 23.

Afterwards I biked to a much more somber occasion, the ghost bike memorial for Jesus

Castillo, killed while bicycling on Glendale Boulevard April 19. Jesus Castillo, a 44-year-old

resident of Echo Park was killed dy a driver who struck him and then fled the scene. Thanks

to witnesses who recorded the vehicle’s license number, the driver was later arrested and

determined not only to be operating a vehicle with a suspended license, but police say he

was driving under the influence at the time of the accident. Pix from the gathering of several

hundred cyclists at the memorial created by my friends Dan Berlant and Stephen Roullier are

viewable here.

And if you’re in the mood for some timelapsed video of the the whole bike commute you

can watch that unfold from the perspective of my handlebarcam over here on YouTube.


LiKE thE intErnEt, OnLy FLaMMabLE


insidE this issuE:

printed with expliCit permission from eaCh Content proVider

Views expressed in Content do not neCessarily refleCt the Views of the publisher or the printed blog inC.


gaspar marquez | tpburl.com/5svywz

katie couric and cbs news get creative

with social media

tabitha hale talks about

the meghan mccain goP

Kaisern Chen | tpburl.com/dkpsqg

laurel dailey | tpburl.com/0fwm9q

how a grownuP handles a meltdown at

the clinic written bY the bloggess



swine flu 101

By Plug1 | 4/29/09 | what i’m seeing dot com tpburl.com/yct1rj

The current swine flu outbreak is the spread of a new strain of the H1N1 influenza virus

that was first detected by public health agencies late last month. Outbreaks of an influenzalike

illness were first detected in three areas of Mexico, but the new strain was not clinically

identified as such until a month later in Texas and California, whereupon its presence was

swiftly confirmed in various Mexican states, the U.S. and several other Northern Hemisphere

countries. This week, the new strain was confirmed in Canada, Spain, the United Kingdom, New

Zealand and Israel and suspected in many other nations, including South Korea and Austria,

with over 2,500 candidate cases, prompting the WHO to raise their pandemic alert level to 4.

By the way, a level 4 warning officially means that the WHO considers that there is

“sustained human to human transmission;” whereas levels 5 and 6 represent “widespread

human infection.”

Symptoms include fever, cough, sore throat, body aches, headache, chills and fatigue.

The current outbreak has shown an increased percentage of patients reporting diarrhea and


The CDC recommends the use of Tamiflu or Relenza for the treatment and/or prevention of

infection with swine influenza viruses, however, the majority of people infected with the virus

make a full recovery without requiring medical attention or antiviral drugs.


follow swine flu’s sPread using google maPs

By nicholas deleon | 4/27/09 | Crunchgear tpburl.com/wf73td

This has been a very exciting year for

things-that-could-kill-us. First it was the

economy that could kill us all; then it was

those Somali pirates who posed a threat to

our very way of life; and now we all should

fear swine flu. Why should we fear la grippe

porcine? Well, it seems to be spreading

around the world pretty swiftly, and it’s

doing a pretty thorough job of wreaking

havoc in Mexico. So, here’s a map!

This Google Map shows confirmed and suspected cases of the virus, H1N1 Swine Flu, as

well as deaths caused by the virus.

As always, Twitter is fairly interesting, watching people freak out in real time.

And, if you’d like hype-free news about Swine Flu, may I suggest Science’s blog? Science’s

coverage is less alarmist than the likes of AP, Reuters, etc.

we back

the bid

and you can too

visit chicago2016.org

Michael Rivera | tpburl.com/k68jmv





(ACTuAllY, we will, BuT iT’s nOT MuCH, YeT), BuT we will GiVe YOu

A sweeT HTMl BADGe.

By natch greyes | 4/26/09 | natch greyes for senate 2020 tpburl.com/qs1k9c

Mexico, that country south of the United

States that most Americans think is a poorer

version of Canada with a drug problem. Of

course, with the Swine Flu outbreak and

subsequent media panic, most Americans now

think of Mexico as a massive quarantine area.

This post will seek to cover two major topics:

Swine Flu and Mexico’s Drug Problem. I’ll also

dry to dispel myths about both of those and

Mexico itself.

First, let’s deal with the irrational media

panic over Swine Flu. (Note: Some of this is

repetition from a previous post).

First, if you’ve never had the (normal) flu, never treated anyone with the (normal) flu, or

never heard of the flu you should look at this CDC Post for dealing with the Swine Flu. Note

that the advice is the exact same as for the Normal Flu.

[Edit: This Section Deleted, please refer to this post instead]

Also, watch the video below, see the long lines? That’s the Mexican health care system, it’s

no surprise that there is a high death rate (although we won’t know more for sure until we get

more data).

Further, you need to realize that (generally) the more rapid the spread of a certain strain of

the flu, the less deadly is that strain. (Think about it: would the strain spread very far if it killed

a high percentage of those who got infected?) Right now, the percentage of deaths for Mexico,

which is bound to be higher than in the U.S., is lower than the typical flu in the U.S. And, there

have been no deaths in the United States. So, panicking (besides not accomplishing anything

anyway) is really, really stupid.

But why, you ask, is this disease spreading so rapidly through Mexico and why does it seem

to be cropping up in certain places in the United States? Well, the outbreak started in Mexico

City, which is a densely packed population. All variants of the flu, like the common cold, are

‘crowd diseases.’ They cannot exist and generally do not spread if originating in isolated, rural

populations. That’s why new strains of the flu typically originate in Asia and South America,

where 3rd World conditions allow the propagation of the disease. Further, this variant of the

Swine Flu most certainly originated in a place where pigs and other farm animals are kept close

by humans, i.e. a 3rd World Style Pig Farm, which, as we know from the Avian Flu makes it

more likely for a human to catch a variant of a disease affecting primarily some other species.

It’s a sad but true fact that since the people who live there don’t understand the concepts of

basic sanitation and therefore don’t employ sanitation techniques that theirs is the place where

these diseases originate, rather than say, North America or Western Europe.

This all relates to the War on Drugs because the effect the Drug Cartels have had on the

development of Mexico and the Mexican economy. Half the Mexican economy is made of

informal sector (Black Market) jobs. While this is, in large part, street vendors, the Drug Cartels

rake in an estimated $30 billion a year. This money is dispersed as payoffs to police officers and

other drug enforcement officers, resulting in the military having to be used to combat the drug

trade. This, in turn, puts pressure on the Mexican government to fight them as well as find new

sources of revenue to help combat both the money and guns of the Cartels. Unfortunately, in

most places, the Cartels are more powerful than the government and thus violence breaks out

whenever the government tries to wretch back control.

This affects the Swine Flu because first, all drugs weaken the immune system (cold

medicines simply repress your immune system on purpose) and so the flu can spread more

easily. And, since Drug Cartels smuggle people over the border illegally (as side work) they can

also assist in the spread of the disease to various places in the United States.

Also, since the Mexican government is concerned with fighting the War on Drugs it

doesn’t have the extra funds necessary to improve Mexico’s infrastructure, health care or, really,

anything else. And, it’s not likely that the Drug Cartels are going to improve anything other

than what helps them funnel drugs to North America (primarily the United States).

adverTising Bryan Feir | tpburl.com/h5nksm

The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300

Shane Walsh | tpburl.com/rx47fw


iT’s like we’Re liVinG On THe

OReGOn TRAil exCePT nOne Of us


By The Bloggess | 4/21/09 | TheBloggess.com tpburl.com/s5tpg4

Yesterday Hailey’s preschool called to tell me that she had a rash on her stomach and

back so I picked her up and I figured it was probably just a reaction from new detergent but I

thought I’d run her by the Readi-Clinic just in case because it was on the way home and also

there’s a pretzel shop right next to it but when I got there the doctor was all “Uh, this kid has

scarlet fever” and I’m all “The fuck?! Like what Beth died from in Little Women?” except I said

it quietly so Hailey wouldn’t hear me and the doctor was all “It’s very treatable now. Don’t

panic” and I’m all “You know, just because I’m at a Readi-Clinic doesn’t mean I don’t have

money. We have great insurance. I just came here because I wanted a pretzel” and the doctor

was all “No, really. Scarlet Fever isn’t a big deal anymore. It’s basically strep throat with a

rash. Calm down” and I’m all “I AM FUCKING CALM” but I just said that in my head because

I didn’t want to freak out Hailey. Then Hailey’s all “Can I have a Popsicle?” and I’m like “We

are going to set all your stuffed animals on fire when we get home” and then the doctor started

laughing and I’m all “I AM DEADLY SERIOUS” and Hailey said we couldn’t throw Donkey on

the bonfire because he’s her favorite and I’m all “Donkey is the germiest. We’re going to burn

him twice” and then Hailey and the doctor both looked at me like I’m the crazy one and I’m all

“Fine. He’s going in the washing machine. Like, for eighteen cycles.” Then the doctor gave us

a prescription for amoxicillin which is like the sad, weird kid of the antibiotic family and I’m

all “What is this, bush-league? I told you, I have money.” Then he made us leave and I was so

upset that I didn’t even remember to get a pretzel, so basically we’re all suffering.

PS. Hailey is fine and is running around like normal and everything in the entire house is

going in the dishwasher. Then I’m going to burn the dishwasher in an abandoned field. I may

be over-reacting.


Founded 2009

Joshua Karp, Founder and Publisher


Jeff Pelline, Managing Editor

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i Tried To make This PosT gender neuTral

By matt | 4/27/09 | a view from 5280ft tpburl.com/hbnycx

I learned something about myself Friday night.

I learned that, when I’m in an argument, I go for the kill right away. Meaning, if I am in

disagreement with someone and it’s totally obvious that we are going to get into debate, I will

deliver my best line first. Before the other person gets a chance to even think about his (or

hers, because I believe in equality) first argument, BOOM- I hit him or her with the low blow. A

verbal rabbit punch to the back of his or her head. Before they even expected it.

And when I say rabbit punch, please don’t picture a little bunny trying to punch someone.

Thats not what it means.

Example time.

Him/Her: Waterboy was by FAR Adam Sandler’s best movie.

Me: Get the fuck out of here. Out of all four of Sandler’s movies (I don’t count most of his

movies as real movies), an ice skater turned golfer is by far the funniest thing he has thought

of. In all of his movies he pretty much takes a guy and turns him into something different. He

takes a drunk and turns him into a teacher, he takes a hockey player and turns him into a golfer,

he takes a waterboy and turns him into a football player, he takes an asshole and turns him into

a lawyer (I know, not much of a difference, right? HEY OH. Sorry lawyers out there… I was just

kidding). It’s the same shit over and over so I am going to go with the movie with the most cuss

words and call it the best. If there was any nudity, it would trump the cuss words but there’s

not. So there you have it.

Do you see what I did there? At the first sign of there being a debate ahead, I went in and

took care of bid-ness. This strategy is always sure to end an argument before it begins and it is

a sure way to win. If this strategy does not work for you, another strategy I use is to talk louder

than the other person. It’s pretty simple- whatever they say, just talk louder than him (or her)

while he (or she) is saying it. That way, people really only hear you.

So there you have it. I hope these strategies work for you as well as they work for me.

I didn’t count but I hope I got in like, at least 5 “him/her’s” in this post.

Chrystel garipuy | tpburl.com/rswmzh

if YOu Miss OuR THuRsDAY MORninG DisTRiBuTiOn Of THe


newsPAPeR fOR THe nexT 100 YeARs.

Janka Mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj

VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 3



inVesTinG in YOuR kiDs’ sTuff

By Jennifer openshaw | 3/31/09 | Blogher.com tpburl.com/hcxk51

Where do investment ideas come from? Something you read in the paper? Something your

broker, or maybe a friend, recommended?

Here’s a thought: What about trying to get some tips from your kids? It can happen.

Any parent who drives children around all day has an all-access pass to a special world —

the world of young consumers. If you listen, you’ll hear what they want, what they are buying,

and — of course — what they want you to buy them. Pay attention to what’s happening in their

world, and you might come up with some good investment ideas of your own (for more on this,

read Rogers Park Montessori School: New Kids on the Stock).

Smells like teen spirit: “Axe — I smell it everywhere,” the mother of a 14-year-old boy

told me. “Axe body spray, Axe body wash, Axe deodorant, Axe hair gel… you get the idea. They

make everything. And every teenaged boy wears that scent.” Axe is everywhere, but where

does it come from? It’s one of the myriad of products made by Dutch consumer products giant

Unilever (UL), traded in the U.S. as an ADR. You know Unilever — they’re the same folks who

bring you your SlimFast.

They wear it well: Under Armour’s (UA) aggressive marketing campaign has apparently

caught on with young boys on the field. Under Armour makes “performance apparel” for sports

like basketball, football, and soccer, and kids wear it with pride. The company recently entered

the running-shoe arena, setting its sights on Nike. Will it succeed?

School of Roxy: The girls who are watching the guys who smell like Axe and wear tight

Under Armour t-shirts are wearing Roxy t-shirts. Sounds like an eighties band, I know, but

it’s one of the many skate/snow board apparel labels owned by surf pioneer Quiksilver (ZQK).

Teenaged girls love Roxy’s tiny t-shirts and hoodies.

Betwixt and Be Tween: Aeropostale (ARO) is a mall store that mothers of tween girls know

all too well. The mother of three young girls told me recently that she’s there so often she’s

memorized the layout of the store near them.

So the next time you get dragged to the store by your children, think of it as research. Who

knows, your next great investment idea might just pop out of one of those shopping bags. It’s a

great example of investing in what you know.


THe wORlD is full Of inTeResTinG PeOPle. fOR eACH issue we PiCk A

uniQue PeRsOn TO PROfile. sHARe YOuR iDeAs ABOuT sOMeOne TO PROfile




a passionate advocate for working

americans, Jennifer openshaw is cofounder

of stock education site weseed

(www.weseed.com), author of a new

book, The millionaire Zone, and a seasoned

expert in finance and investing. she appears

regularly on oprah, good morning america

and Cnn and has been featured in the new

york Times, usa Today and Business week.

Jennifer has lived her own “rags to riches”

story, getting her first job as a maid in a

motel when she was 14 years old to help

support her family. from these humble but

determined beginnings, she launched and

propelled her career in financial services,

with an mBa from uCla and a job as press

secretary for California’s state Treasurer.

Jennifer has since worked as vice president at Bank of america, senior vice president

of corporate marketing at Bank one, head of marketing for investment firm wilshire

associates, and chief executive of family financial network.

she has gone on to start several successful ventures. in 1999, Jennifer founded women’s

financial network, a financial services company created for women. she now serves as

president of weseed, designed to help people use their passions and professions to make

better investment decisions.

Jennifer also is host of aBC radio’s “winning advice,” aol’s family financial editor and a

member of the young entrepreneurs organization. The governor of California has appointed

her to the prestigious Commission on California state government organization and


as a proven entrepreneur and powerful voice for “the little guy,” Jennifer knows that

ordinary people often have limited resources but unlimited aspirations. her life’s mission

is to share her secrets of how successful people get ahead and empower middle-income

americans to reach their financial dreams.


jennifeR OPensHAw

GOOGle’s CeO GeTs An OffiCiAl


By adam ostrow | 4/27/09 | mashable tpburl.com/8zc3js

The close ties between Google CEO Eric Schmidt and President Barack Obama are welldocumented.

Schmidt endorsed Obama’s Presidential campaign, and in the months since he has

taken office, the leader of the world’s most popular search engine has also been a guest at the

White House to discuss policy alongside some of the country’s top economists and financiers.

Although Schmidt quickly took his name out of the running to become CTO of the USA

after Obama was elected, today, he’s been officially named to a new role: that of a member of

President’s Council of Advisors on Science and Technology.

That group, according to a statement issued today by The White House, will advise

the President on “[formulating] policy in the many areas where understanding of science,

technology, and innovation is key to strengthening our economy and forming policy that works

for the American people.”

It’s worth noting that Craig Mundie, Chief Research and Strategy Officer at Microsoft,

is also on the list of advisers, so fear of Google getting unfair sway with the nation’s Chief

Executive are probably a bit unfounded.

Nonetheless, it probably doesn’t sit well with those that think Google already has just a bit

too much power that the company’s CEO will now have a seat at the President’s table in a role

that will clearly help define tech policy going forward.

kATie COuRiC AnD CBs news GeT


By Jennifer van grove | 4/22/09 | mashable tpburl.com/43ymbn

Hi there, Facebookers! Katie Couric has a video challenge for you. The CBS Evening News

anchor is putting the upgraded Facebook Pages to good use.

In a 48 second video clip posted to her page, Couric explains that she’s going to be

taking stock of President Barack Obama’s first 100 days in office, and she needs your help (and

Facebook juice) to do it.

The challenge, should you choose to accept, is to create a 20 second video on what

Obama’s done wrong or right while in office, and post it to her Facebook Page. The best videos

will be included in a live broadcast from CBSNews.com on April 29 at 7pm EST.

Even though Couric acknowledges that she’s crossing into trendier territories by stating

“my daughters think it’s really funny I have a Facebook Page…funny weird,” we still think

that she’s doing a fantastic job combining her star power with social media savvy to raise her

profile on Facebook and grow the CBS audience through potentially viral channels. The power

of massive comments, likes, and user-created Facebook videos, is that the CBS message gets

dispersed to new audiences (friends of friends) with every act of sharing.

Oddly enough, we’re unable to share the video with you here due to Facebook’s archaic

video sharing limitations (you can only share videos with your Facebook network on Facebook).

But, should you be interested in participating in the challenge, you can watch the video and

participate here.

She’s already hip to YouTube and Digg, now Facebook, so what’s next Couric? A 140

character Twitter challenge (she’s already tweeting as @katiecouric) perhaps? That sounds fun.


reCession gaming: Two hyPer-addiCTive free games

By danielle riendeau | 4/16/09 | gamertell tpburl.com/3n48vx

There’s nothing sweeter than finding fun

on the cheap - or better - for free, especially

when it comes to videogames. Now that

everyone is weary about spending (yes, the

economy is ruining everything, and no one

is immune), finding good, free web-based

games has become a hobby for many. I’m here

to point you in the direction of two that are

particularly compelling - for entirely different


The first, I have to admit, is something

I stumbled on while reading Kotaku. ScaryGirl, as it’s called is a robust, gorgeous platformer/

adventure game that looks and plays as if Psychonauts had a baby with Super Mario Brothers

and the old Beetlejuice cartoon was somehow involved. It’s as full-featured (and beautifully

animated) as a good full-priced game, so the fact that you can play it for free - and in your

browser - is pretty fantastic.

On the other end of the spectrum is the juvenile, hilarious Don’t Sh*t Your Pants, which is

a text-based adventure game (though the creators have dubbed it “survival horror”). It centers

on a very simple - and nasty - premise (don’t do number two in your pants) and stars a crudely

drawn dude who looks like he started out life in MS Paint, but no matter - the fact that there

are about nine “achievements” to earn will have you playing until you figure them all out. I

seriously could not stop playing this last night - though I’m not sure what that says about me.

I dare you to try these games and not feel gratified - and if you hate them, well, it didn’t

cost you a penny.

The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300


i do noT undersTand These words

By michelle woo | 4/23/09 | michelle woo tpburl.com/4195x3

J. Cook photography | tpburl.com/f67ngz



THe wAll PROjeCT

By Joshua karp | 4/30/09 | The Printed Blog tpburl.com/bp3w29

It’s no secret that communication technologies are bridging geographical and cultural gaps.

With a little creativity, they are also proving they have the power to do much more.

In the Phillipines, for example, large-scale demonstrations organized via cell phones and

SMS helped force President Joseph Estrada’s resignation, thus bringing about major political

change without violence.

At the Northwood School in London, students use video conferencing technology to

interact with pupils at primary schools in the U.S. and China. The children are quickly able to

develop more intimate levels of cultural appreciation as a result, learning about Thanksgiving

from children in Texas, and practicing Tai Chi with children in Hong Kong.

The service Videoletters.net captures video messages from former neighbors and friends

throughout the war-torn countries of the Former Yugoslavia, broadcasting them via public

access channels so those who lost contact during conflict can reconnect.

While remarkable and inspiring, these innovative examples lack the power and appeal of

firsthand, personal experience. We do not live in a world of avatars. Our facial expressions are

not emoticons. Existing interfaces for navigating the virtual world continue to evolve, but they

are no substitute for real world interaction.

But what if technology could be harnessed to bend the rules? What if there was an

innovative communications solution that could blur the line between virtual and real world

interaction? What if there was a way to enable large-scale, face-to-face interactions between

citizens all over the world…in real-time? It would be like opening a window into another part of

the world.

Well, that window exists. And that window is a wall.

The Wall is a groundbreaking new project that aims to tear down geographic and cultural

barriers like never before via the construction of monumental “smart” walls in locations around

the globe. Designed to serve as audio-visual gateways, citizens of the world will be able to

see, hear, and interact with their international ‘neighbors’ in an open forum that promotes

empathy, dialogue, and unprecedented human collaboration.

Sound like a lofty goal? The Wall’s inspiring and ambitious mission is founded upon

concrete, achievable pillars set forth by Joshua Karp – entrepreneur, optimist and founder of The

Printed Blog. Joshua believes that the greatest opportunities to change the world start with one

person, a single idea, and the belief that anything is possible.

In 50 cities around the world, 50 interactive video walls will be constructed in large,

open and accessible urban hubs. The walls will be approximately 1000 feet long by 50 feet tall

by 15 feet thick. They will be built using high definition monitors, video cameras, speakers,

and microphones. They will be constructed to be impervious to weather and vandalism, and

designed with respect to each individual city’s unique heritage and urban plan.

How will these walls work? They will interface in tandem with sister walls in other

cities according to a rotation of eight-hour intervals, with schedules made public through a

predetermined schedule.

A man in Chicago will meet face-to-face and interact in real-time with a woman in New

Delhi. A boy in Mosul will play rock, paper, scissors with a girl in Amsterdam. Speeches,

lectures, rallies, protests, discussions, concerts, classes, field trips, commerce, games, love affairs,

arguments and more will occur across the wall…and across the world.

The Wall will inevitably bear witness to horrors and atrocities as well. Thus, it will ensure

we do not turn a blind eye to murder, theft, persecution and injustice. Imagine how much faster

violence would end and peace would come if people stopped averting their eyes.

The Wall presents an opportunity to dissolve barriers between cultures and create an

environment of global discourse on an unprecedented scale. A strong global community

begins with citizens capable of facing realities honestly – and those realities can only be fully

understood through real world interaction.

Where the Internet has facilitated virtual world interaction on a global scale, the Wall

will encourage real world interaction on the same scale. Something remarkable and inspiring,


hire me

THis jusT in: THe CuRRenT jOB MARkeT is Awful. we CAn HelP YOu finD

YOuR wAY OuT Of YOuR BATHROBe AnD inTO A GReAT new jOB. senD

A COuPle senTenCes ABOuT YOuRself, YOuR linkeDin PROfile, AnD A


noTe To readers

Tim yuen / Copywriter

Went to new york to look for a job as a copywriter, came back to Chicago a few

months later due to the economic recession. now working out thanks to my p90x

routine but would rather write copy for advertising agency. Check out my work/

resume at www.timyuenportfolio.com


Bob Johnson / photographer

My photography and writing has been published in the new york times, Star

magazine, newsday, timeout/ny, the new york Resident, playbill.com and more.

My photos also have been featured on aBC’s the View and tMZ. i am seeking a

position that will combine my photography, writing and video skills so that i can

continue to follow my passions in life. http://www.linkedin.com/in/bittenbyazebra

Cover photo Correction

the printed Blog mislabeled the cover photograph

credit in the Chicago loop edition of Vol1 no13. the

correct photographer’s name is Michal Czerwonka. We

regret the error.

tagline Credit

“like the internet, only flammable.”

this tagline was submitted by Marc Muszynski, a

runner-up in our tagline contest.

VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 5


environmenTal TeChnology

CATCH A GReen fliCk AT A sOlAR


By stephanie rogers | 4/26/09 | earthfirst.com tpburl.com/v4fwsx

Next time you’re heading out to see the latest eco flick (hey, there’s a really Oscar-worthy

looking Val Kilmer movie due sometime this year!), you could see it in a solar-powered movie

theater. At least, you can if you live in Livermore, California. Livermore Cinemas has installed

an 18,000 square foot solar installation that will reportedly provide 35% of the theater’s energy

needs, and cut its electric bill by 45%.

Alternative Consumer reports that the system will provide about 190,000 kilowatts of

electricity over the course of a year, and that installation of the system isn’t expected to impact

ticket prices.

But even if it did – would you pay extra? I think the willingness of consumers to spend

an extra fifty cents or so per ticket would encourage more theater owners across the country to

install their own renewable energy systems. I’d definitely go out of my way to patronize a movie

theater that cares enough to install such an impressive solar array.

feaTured PhoTograPher

lAuRel DAileY



right off the bat, allow me to completely alienate 75% of

our readers by stating that i’m a west Coast girl, born and

raised: long Beach by way of oregon. i’ll probably die out

here, in keruoac’s “ragged promised land,” buried under

a pile of unread books, taxidermied antlers and camera

equipment. death by The Big one – an earthquake, that

is. i think about earthquakes at least three times a day,

but come hell or high water, i’m sticking to my guns.

There’s no better place to explore wild unknowns than

here: the conquered desert, embittered metropolitan

constellations under a starless sky.

i was raised in the wild suburbs of oregon and picked up a Pentax k1000 in high school.

once i got my proverbial first taste of the stench that developer chemicals leave on your

skin, i was hooked. a pile of debt and a few years of education later, i’m still shooting every


wim wenders refers to photography as “an act in two directions.” as the shutter releases,

an image is created that contains not only the subject, but also a vague shadow of the

photographer. as The Printed Blog’s Photo editor, it has been my pleasure to cull the depths

of the interwebs to bring you the very best acts in two directions; both the images and the

artists who created them.

an act of defiance in the face of a whimpering economy deserves to be applauded, and

so i’m giving you a standing ovation, TPB, as well as you, the readers, who’ve made this

venture a success thus far. while i’m taking my final bow as Photo editor, i’m confident

that The Printed Blog will blaze right on ahead, exploring those ragged promised lands we

all long for.


Janka Mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj

If you want to see a story go popular, choose

your tweets wisely.

Be a leader and be the first to tweet breaking

news that will soon be heard around the world,

and go on to make history. Find a story,

website or resource with a funny or unique

angle that no one else has spread around yet.

Or, find interesting images that are sure to

captivate and inspire your audience.

Whatever the type of content that you choose

to tweet about, just make sure that it’s so -

awesome that it makes your followers feel they

absolutely have to share it with their friends

too, which brings us to the next point…

Read more from this guide and others at guidespot.com

The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300

it’s your spot in the universe

The Easy Guide To Making Your

Tweets Soar to Popularity

By: granolajoe


Twitter is about self expression and person-to-person communication, but its power lies in its

capacity as a broadcasting tool. A single tweet carrying the right message can make huge waves

across the Twitterverse, and also spread to other social channels on the Web. However, just

because a random tweet can go viral every once in a while, doesn't mean you can expect

everyone on Twitter to go nuts about everything that you tweet. By following these easy

recommendations, you can ensure that your tweets are of the highest quality and get the best

shot at going popular.

Make Your Tweet Count

Get ReTweeted

Whether you’re a user with a moderate

following or a power user with many

thousands of followers, your tweets depend on

the community to go popular.

When you get retweeted, your story is exposed

to the networks of your friends, gaining more

potential to go popular as more users retweet

it. Not all users will be reading their timelines

at once, but it increases the chance of your

tweet being seen and clicked through.

Keep a steady flow of high quality and

interesting tweets and users will take notice.

You’ll gain a reputation for making great

tweets, get retweeted more often, and you’ll

also gain more followers.

Get Help From Your Followers

and Friends In High Places

You may be a user with a solid following who

has no problem getting retweeted, but you

would still like your content to get more

traction than 6-7 retweets and a few hundred

clicks. That’s where friends come into play.

Don’t make it a habit, but if there is something

that you are really passionate about, ask your

friends for some help.

Also, if you have a friend with a huge following

and your tweet fits their audience, ask if they

would consider a retweet. Occasionally you

may get lucky and won’t even have to ask,

especially if they follow you and take notice.


sTRAnGelY, THe MAn in THis

eleCTRifYinG PHOTO is


By Jack loftus | 4/19/09 | gizmodo tpburl.com/kpbz94

Meet Peter Terren. Inspired by The Thinker, he set

out to recreate that classic sculpture using electricity,

wire caging, a conductive foil suit, and a death wish.

Can’t forget the death wish.

Now, we’ve seen Terren and Tesla Down Under’s

work before here at Gizmodo, most notably when he

put his son in a car and zapped it with electricity.

This little project, however, put him in the hot

seat. Note the electricity shooting out of his sneaker.

Lucky for us all, Terren meticulously documented

the entire project with photos and safety-related

commentary (“The wig is not ideal and really needs

a haircut. I couldn’t light it with sparks so fire risk

dr. peter terren

seems low”).

Terren also outfitted some of the tests with a pentagram boundary, which had nothing to

do with Tesla coils or electricity, of course, but certainly heightened the sense of batshit insanity

surrounding this little venture.

quiCk BluB: sTake your soCial media name now

By Jack Peterson | 4/27/09 | marketing Juice tpburl.com/7wmyqv

Remember the circus of cyber

squatting domain names back in

the day? Everyone was scrambling

to own their domain names before

cyber squatters owned them and

held them for ransom $$$. A new

service called “knowem?” checks and registers your brand name, username or vanity URL in the

Social Media space (websites). I just registered my company. Register before the Social Media

land grab comes of age. Do it now or someone will hold you and your company hostage. It’s a

great service that will do all the time consuming username registering for you.



Brandon Showers | tpburl.com/b5cr3p

John parli | tpburl.com/v27zkb



By simon Crisp | 4/27/09 | newslite tpburl.com/06g2rp

An artist has created a set of vinyl figures which he hopes will encourage more people to

donate their organs.

David Foox came up with the idea for his ‘Organ Donors’ collection - dolls which

have hearts, lungs, eyeballs and brains for heads - after a family member had a double lung


While ‘Uncle Ken’ survived the op, David wanted to use his art to draw attention to organ

donation and started work on the 24 doll collection.

The £10 figures come in ‘blind boxes’ meaning the buyer does not know what they have

got until they open it ... and their gory nature could leave surprised heart attack victims needing

a transplant.

“Human body parts are interchangeable and as much as we know about the body, there is

so much more to learn,” said Foox from Denver.

“It is a conceptual way of dealing with our humanity - whether physical or spiritual. It is

also supposed to be a lighthearted approach to a serious, bloody, and gory issue.”

He says most people have reacted positively to seeing the figures though sometimes people

think they are “spooky” or “freaky.”

The collection can be ordered online.



By hunter | 4/21/09 | The daily kos tpburl.com/1yz8n6

I can only fathom that we are supposed to beg.

I think we are supposed to get down on our knees, even grovel for it, and beg that our

nation act in accordance with its own laws, with international laws, and with basic decency.

We among the more expendable classes are supposed to write passionate editorials; we are

supposed to form grass roots movements; we are supposed to make the usual dozens of phone

calls, and be ashamed, and debase ourselves - and then, perhaps, if we are very lucky, and if

we beg enough and with the right arguments and place enough pressure in the right, most

uncomfortable spots, then our own government will relent, and our laws will be followed, and

investigations conducted, and if warranted, those responsible will be prosecuted. And we will

finally as a nation, at long last, reject torture in practice as well as in words.

But they will not do it, unless they are bowed to it by the collective weight of their own

citizens. That seems to be, still, the message: they will not acquiesce unless bludgeoned into

doing it. It is ceded to us to decide if America will have the smallest shard of conscience, and

once again the voices of basic decency will be cast as the unreasonable ones, the foolish ones,

the troublemaking rabble pestering those that know better, and we shall have to rise above it yet

another time.

That is the only conclusion I can come to. It seems transparently obvious to Washington,

to the Obama administration and its allies, to the Republicans and the Democrats of Congress,

to all the very important people working very serious jobs, that while we can with great fanfare

and self-satisfaction no longer torture prisoners in our care -- a war crime, in any context not

involving ourselves -- it is far more challenging a proposition to think that we would actually

take steps to enforce the myriad laws and conventions against it.

And in that sense, torture by the United States of America is as good as legalized, because

we have all but declared that it will never be that illegal, the kind of illegal that leads to

investigations and punishment. It will merely remain a deplorable act -- a war crime, in any

context not involving us doing the torture -- that we will never, ever use, except when we

do, and without consequence. We will not condone it but, like in Serbia, or Guatemala, or

Cambodia, or the thugs of any one of a hundred pissant groups and countries that used the

practice to vicious effect, when to their advantage, we will ignore the laws, the treaties and

conventions, and we will not prosecute our torturers. Or, God forbid, those that specifically

ordered the practice. Or those that sought to legalize it, on pen and paper, with arguments

comprehensible only to sociopaths or monsters.

It apparently needs to be stated, yet again, that this is not a case of seeking vengeance.

When powerful people are caught in illegal acts, it is nearly always the case that they claim

prosecuting them would be “vengeance:” it never enters the minds of our leaders, whether

they be in government or in business, that perhaps the law should be applied to them simply

because it is the law. There always needs to be additional motive attributed; it goes nearly

without saying that, without the additional motives of vengeance, or revenge, or punishment

then naturally those in power are not held to the laws required of the rest of us. You know you

have arrived, in America, when you can break a law at will and have the government itself argue

against your prosecution on the grounds that doing so would be controversial or divisive.

Whether or not any of the parties involved are actually convicted, whether even a single

one of them see a day of jail time is not the question. Whether we preclude that possibility, as

policy of government, is the more damaging question. For in precluding even the possibility

of justice, we immunize the act, and if we immunize the act then it is not, in any meaningful

sense, actually illegal.

It is not about revenge: it is about demonstrating that even for the most powerful among

us, even for our own government, there are laws, and they are not optional. It is about

demonstrating that we are a country in which law has a substance that overrides the credentials

of the person breaking it. It is the brightest shining example of what we as a nation are or are

not: it is our moral measure.

Knowing that torture was condoned in our names is an abominable thing. This parlor

game of moving forward, not backward, of letting bygones be bygones, admitting error, and just

getting the hell on with our days is just as dismal, because this, finally, internalizes the message

that we citizens, our government, and other nations will take from this sorry affair, which is

that while we begrudgingly acquiesce to stopping, we will, even now, refuse to recognize the act

itself as truly criminal.

There is absolutely no pride to be gained in no longer torturing, but blocking justice in

those instances in which we have. It is no act of courage; it is no enlightened position. It is

merely the easiest path, and the one followed in nearly every instance by nations proven to

have committed foul acts. Sorry, but we’re not about to do anything about it. We’ll stop, but in

exchange for stopping we expect the episode to be forgotten. What would count as a war crime

for you other countries counts for us as an internal matter, and we consider it closed.

I do not feel like begging. After years of railing against the practice (to be largely ignored,

because in those days the majority of voices presumed torture to have positive effects, and

therefore be justified), after years of government denial that any such thing was happening (in

spite of clear and demonstrable evidence that it did), the last thing in the world that I feel like

doing is once again begging, at long last, and to the supposed reasonable people that replaced

the last reasonable people, that we actually follow our own goddamn laws, or treat crimes by

our powerful with the same grave manner as we do crimes by anyone else in the nation.

I am fucking sick of it, and I am fucking sick of hearing how we have entered a new age of

enlightenment merely because we have stopped a transparently abominable practice, one that

we condemn with vigor when undertaken by any other nation. I am fucking sick of myself,

my compatriots and the rest of the public having to act as collective conscience for all those in

power that, apparently, have long since evolved past even common sense, much less common


I know by tomorrow or next week I will relent, and I will start the cause anew, and I will

join all the others in penning yet another fervent message explaining why, at long last -- at long

fucking last -- we cannot simultaneously condemn torture and yet declare a casual, dismissive

amnesty for all those that ordered it, and planned it, and justified it, and executed it, under the

usual theory of the powerful that crimes by the powerful simply cannot be prosecuted lest chaos

or embarrassment ensue.

But for today, I can only say damn you all to hell. Damn you all for making us -- us, of all

people, average citizens with no positions of power, with no power at all save whatever we can

wring out of the thin air, and with nothing at stake but a sense of shared, basic, foundational

morality -- yet again rail for our own country to exercise a shred of the morality, the justice,

the national greatness that it professes for all to hear. I was once outraged; I was, after that,

ashamed; now I am only incredulous. With every passing day my nation acts less like a guiding

beacon, and more like a crook.


Johnny daigneault | tpburl.com/mhqcp2

VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 7



in the spirit of recycling, this week’s playlist features a selection of some excellent and

surprising covers. everything old is new again! For more song covers, check out www.

coversproject.com. and don’t forget to email your favorite song(s) to tpB’s Music editor

amanda nyren at anyren@theprintedblog.


“act nice and gentle” - Black Keys

Black Keys do the Kinks’ “Act Nice and Gentle” justice, adding a little

southern rock twang to the mix.


“Borderline” - the Flaming lips

The Flaming Lips’ cover of my favorite 80s Madonna hit is just as good,

if not better, than the original.


“i Poke her face” - Kid Cudi w Kanye West

Okay so this Kid Cudi/Kanye West rehash of Lady Gaga’s acoustic “Poker

Face” is really more of a sample than a cover. But when the track is this

good, why quibble?


“rave on” - M. Ward

M. Ward has covered David Bowie, Daniel Johnston and Billie Holiday,

but his fresh take on Buddy Holly’s classic “Rave On” is easily his best



“20 dollar” - M.i.a.

M.I.A. puts her electropunk warrior princess spin on The Pixies’ cult

classic “Where Is My Mind.”


“nobody does it Better” - Radiohead

Thom Yorke’s whiny vocals seem made for this yearning Carly Simon

hit. Plus, the song choice reassures us that Radiohead is not too elitist

to enjoy 70s soft rock.


“superstar” - Sonic youth

Featured in the lovable indie flick Juno, Sonic Youth’s rendition of The

Carpenters’ “Superstar” is a haunting twist on a saccharine power ballad.


“Take me to the river” - talking heads

Talking Heads’ version of “Take Me to the River” is arguably more

famous than the original, done by soul man Al Green. Just try singing

this song without picturing David Byrne in his boxy spongebob

squarepants suit.




david Brown

we are hunTed

We are hunted aggregates social networks, p2p networks, music forums and blogs

to compile a chart of the most popular songs in the blogosphere based on sentiment,

expression and advocacy rather than a mere download count. it’s a smart and highly

addictive way to discover new music. here, this week’s top nine emerging songs.

(as of april 29, 2009)

moTh’s wings

Passion PiT


ares (villains


BloC ParTy


Thank you god for

fixing The TaPe...




givin’ uP (don

diaBlo remix

one eskimo



Joe and will ask?


heavy Cross

The gossiP


The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300

raven (Crookers


The Proxy


leT love rule 2009

(JusTiCe remix)

lenny kraviTZ


your way

xu xu fang


wAnT TO Tell OuR ReADeRs ABOuT YOuR Business? OuR ADs ARe


wiTH THe PRinTeD BlOG will HelP YOuR Business, wRiTe



CiTy life


By vmichael | 4/13/09 | Time Tells tpburl.com/twvpdc

I am reading Michael Meyer’s The Last Days of Old Beijing which is an excellent journal

about the death and life of a traditional Beijing hutong, which is a narrow lane of courtyard

houses. I was reading about how the planners and developers considered these areas slums even

though they functioned extremely well and served more as incubators of improvement and socialization

than harbingers of decay. Yet crime statistics that “proved” the area was overcrowded

were enough to mark it for demolition.

As Meyer described it, I thought immediately of Jane Jacob’s Death and Life of Great American

Cities and the story of Boston’s North End, which was statistically a slum but visibly NOT. I

only had to turn the page and Meyer told of Herbert Gans’ 1959 article on Boston’s North End

and Jacobs’ coverage of the same subject and her wonderful term for what was happening in

these traditional “stable, low-rent areas:” Unslumming.

Wow. There it is. For the last quarter century we have had only the term “gentrification”

but the problem with that term is that it describes something that can happen with old buildings

- like much of the near north side of Chicago or Wicker Park - OR with new buildings, like

those unprotected areas near Old Town and Wicker Park where the values rise so fast and high

that the developers are putting up $2 million Lollapallazzos on spec. Like this one on Burling.

Which is probably $5 million.

But “unslumming” DOESN’T happen with new buildings. It only happens with old buildings.

I had forgotten Jacobs’ term, but it exactly describes what happened in North Kenwood

and Oakland in the early 1990s, which I chronicled in Future Anterior four years ago ( http://


In Meyers’ Dazhalan hutong in Beijing, as in the 1950s North End and 1990s North Kenwood,

people with middle-class aspirations were unslumming their neighborhoods by rebuilding

them bit by bit and little by little and with the existing buildings. But - as Meyers quotes

Jacobs - such neighborhoods are doomed because no one is making a fortune on them. No

fortunes, no big plans, no developers, just tons and tons of incremental improvements in safety,

in socialization, in economic strength, in morality and education. A brilliant story of reclaimed

humanity and human progress, but one with no place in our limited, clumsy economy.

It’s funny. In politics this Spring, the LOSERS are whining about socialism but when it

comes to real estate development, it works the same under socialism and capitalism. I noticed

it when I first went to China in 2003: In communist China huge skyscrapers were built not

because they were needed but because there were pension funds that needed to invest in real

estate, whereas in capitalist USA huge skyscrapers were built not because they were needed but

because there were pension funds that needed to invest in real estate.

Neither country makes room for the aspiring middle class that wants to do what Jacobs

counseled: Save the people and fix the buildings. But in socialist China, that approach doesn’t

show enough progress fast enough for government officials and it doesn’t show enough profit

for wealthy developers. In capitalist USA, that approach doesn’t show enough progress fast

enough for government officials and it doesn’t show enough profit for wealthy developers. So

you see the difference, right? Right?

Preservation as we know it today derives from a postwar effort to rebuild with what was

already there. It was opposed to centralized planning in the form of urban renewal and it was

opposed to catastrophic development in the form of big projects. Preservation actually points

the way toward a third economics, a democratic economics that frees us from the clumsy hands

of the cadres and the equally clumsy hands of the hedge fund managers, from the destructive

tendencies of two outdated approaches to city building.


anna donlan | tpburl.com/pcr8s3

Kari otero | tpburl.com/qrz1sh



By Tabitha hale | 4/21/09 | Pink elephant Pundit tpburl.com/c8zqs6

So if we learned one thing from Meghan McCain it’s that the GOP is like, so not relevant.

Her dad showed us that moderates are wholly ineffective because they never really know who

they are appealing to. What ends up happening is that they appeal to no one. When your

platform is murky, your ideals are blurry, AND you are uncool, you just don’t stand a chance.

People will choose the real thing over Democrat Lite.

Meghan McCain is the DEFINITION of a moderate. What she DOES do well is embody the

typical uninvolved voter. The masses thrive on superficiality, no matter how much those that

are paying attention bemoan the ignorance. Melissa Clouthier says it well:

Republicans need to do better. they need to be more principled and more defined and also appeal to

people who find smooth talking, fine suits, fabulous mascara and superficial trappings important. to

ignore either part of this puzzle will cause us to lose again.

That hurts, doesn’t it? However, the problem we’re running into is that we tried to appeal

to the superficial crowd without making sure they were prepared for the national spotlight.

Republicans have a propensity to devour their own - if they’re good at nothing else, they’re

good at self-destruction. Which is what they’ve effectively done.

I’m a conservative first. I ended up with the GOP simply because, like most conservatives,

I tend to vote with a lesser of two evils mentality. I think a lot of us are fed up with voting

AGAINST people. It’s high time we had someone to vote FOR. A GOP that represents McCain

style “big tent” Republicans does nothing but turn us into Democrats… and further alienate the


What the GOP seems to forget is that liberty is NOT a partisan issue. It is NOT something

that belongs to Conservatives - it transcends race, gender, sexuality, and politics. What we’re

seeing is the buy-in to the Democratic lie that liberty is a government issue, when it is truly a

human issue that the government in its current form infringes upon.

Rick Moran at Right Wing Nut House posted what should have been a depressing article.

Oddly enough, I was slightly energized by the end of it. The depressing part was that even under

the most conservative American President in history, government did not shrink. Reagan said

that once government is there, it never goes away. And it’s entirely too true. This is not a new

problem - this has been a long time coming. Pure logic - when something keeps growing, and

never shrinks, it is eventually going to get too big. And the GOP can stand around preaching

small government all day long, but the hard truth is that they have not EVER been able to make

it happen. The fact that their credibility has been completely blown away is not going to help

win elections. Moran refers to the GOP hope that Obama will in effect win the next election for

them the “illusion of opportunity”… and I have to admit that I don’t think he’s all wrong.

The reason I’m inspired? It kind of chased away my sense of fear. Why should our

principles be tied to a party? There is little logic to our fear of a GOP failure. As conservatives,

we should understand that no insitution is ever “too big” to fail. We’re willing to let bankers,

the auto industry, and everyone else fail in the name of capitalism… why are we any different?

Do we TRULY believe that in the absence of the GOP another would not rise up? The majority

of our country is center right. The hole left in the absence of the GOP WILL be filled - our

country is not going to just hand itself over to a one party system.

I had someone on Twitter tell me that if the GOP dies “America will be consumed by

neoleft darkness. The world will be a jungle. Civilization will be finished!” Can we say dramatic

much? It’s exactly this kind of fear that keeps us voting for McCains in the hope of hanging on

by a thread instead of starting over. It happened with the Whigs, and it can happen again.

I’m not saying that we should throw the GOP out the window. I’m not saying we should all

put on tin foil hats and start running around trying to run for Congress. All I’m saying is that

the death of the GOP does NOT mean the death of America - that if the recent conservative/

libertarian movements are any indicator, there will be a quick rise of another party. Maybe it

would be nice to have the GOP out of the way to give someone else a chance.

Just hypothesizing here folks. Liberty is non-partisan. I think that we should strive to be as

well… why would you hang on to a sinking ship when you can jump off and build a new one?



feaTured Blogger





Tabitha hale is a new face on the political scene. a

25-year-old college grad, she is a recent addition to the

conservative political blogosphere. since returning to

her home state of north Carolina, she has made her

voice heard as the Pink elephant Pundit and gained

exposure for her unapologetic approach to political

commentary as well as for her self-proclaimed

obsession with social media. she holds a special

affection for Twitter, where roughly 20,000 followers

check her updates daily.

Chris Kitahara | tpburl.com/7z0tw6

although serious about her beliefs, Tabitha makes light of her addiction to all things political.

“i refer to myself as a future recovering political junkie,” she says. some of her current projects

include writing for Pink elephant Pundit and american issues Project and working as a board

member of smart girl Politics, an active grassroots organization supporting conservative

women. her most recent undertaking is an internet radio show launching this week on rfC

radio, aptly titled “raisin’ hale.” despite the rapid growth of smart girl Politics and the buzz

surrounding hale, grassroots politics doesn’t pay the bills just yet. she still juggles a 40 hour-aweek

job and active church life in addition to what she refers to as her “political alter ego.”

“There’s life outside of politics. That’s how i plan to keep it,” she says. This is just the beginning

for hale, who doesn’t plan on going anywhere. “i’m trying to be a voice and say things that need

to be said – it’s a passion. i’ll be around for a while.”

VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 9


BiG in jAPAn: enViROnMenTAllY

fRienDlY Bikinis MADe Of PlAsTiC


By serkan Toto | 4/17/09 | Crunchgear tpburl.com/4wn1c7

Tokyo-based chemical company Asahi Kasei, a corporate giant with 25,000 employees,

has announced an environmentally friendly product of the very special kind: swimsuits [JP].

The lovely ladies you can see on the picture (Ayumi Kura, 20, on the left and eighteen-year-old

Shi Weng Lu on the right) are wearing bikinis made of polyethylene tephthalate. Polyethylene

tephthalate (PET) is the stuff they use to make plastic bottles.

Asahi Kasei claims the swimsuits they make from PET (marketed under the brand name

Sunplay ECO) are very quick to dry and offer a high level of elasticity. I bet they do. The

company also says that compared to conventional swimwear, Sunplay products have a better

environmental footprint by using less oil and releasing less carbon dioxide in the production


Unfortunately, Asahi Kasei hasn’t said yet when the new swimwear will be sold and if it will

find its way outside Japan, too.


Too faT To fly (BuT noT Too Tall?)

By harriet | 4/18/09 | feed me! tpburl.com/ntxh4q

My daughter took a flight recently and sat next to a man who she guessed was over seven

feet tall. No lie. And because there was no elbow rest between their seats, she spent the flight

hunched into a corner of her seat.

You can be damn sure this gentleman was not charged for two seats. And yet anyone who

now flies United who takes up more than his or her allotted seat centimeters due to weight will

be charged for two seats. So flying fat will cost you double, but flying tall won’t.

I find United’s new policy offensive and discriminatory on many levels. If you do too,

consider following the directions in the form letter below, which was created by Marilyn Wann,

to protest. Because you better believe that if United gets away with this, all the major carriers

will start imposing a fat flyers’ penalty. And who’s to say what’s “too fat” to fly with a single

ticket? Down the line, could ticket agents be whipping out BMI charts when you get your

boarding pass? I put nothing past this fatphobic society (and the airlines’ desperation to turn a




united airlines is the last of the major carriers to announce proudly a policy of charging fat passengers


they say they received 700 complaints last year (out of 80 million passengers carried) from thin

people who did not like having a fat person sit next to them and perhaps take up some of their

seat space.

i am convinced that the 700 fat seatmates who didn’t complain were not too happy about the situation,

either. people in the fat pride community have decided to try and beat that 700 complaints


i’m writing to ask you and the people you know to complain at united.com about this costly and

discriminatory targeting of one demographic group. if this policy stands, it means fat people have

less right to interstate air travel than other people. everybody deserves a safe and comfortable

chair on an airplane, at an affordable price!

here’s the link for Customer Relations.

expect to be asked to fill in some irksome required fields:

- if you don’t have a united frequent flier number, you can use mine: 00229870823.

- For flight info, i just put 4/15/2009 (the day united announced its policy).

- For departure and return cities, i put San Francisco in both slots.

please copy your complaint letter to my e-mail address, so we can keep count as we approach

and pass 700.

thanks tons! - [insert your name and e-mail address]

Janka Mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj

life wiTHOuT eVenTs is like A COOkie wiTHOuT CHOCOlATe

CHiPs. sO sHARe YOuR eVenTs wiTH THe wORlD, Be THeY leCTuRes,


MCflY fAn CluB MeeTinGs BY senDinG An eMAil TO eVenTs@


google kind of love or why TBid and i are going To The

shooTing range

By amanda | 4/27/09 | noisiest Passenger tpburl.com/xrpf3w

I’m really good at beginning relationships - open, adventurous, and unavailable enough to

stay interesting.

The problem begins when I start to like the guy. Because people who really like and grow

to love each other tend to want to spend time together. Sometimes they want to hear each

other’s voices before they drift off to sleep or share the most banal details of their days and feel

captivating and supported. Occasionally, they just want to be around with no purpose but to

say, “I could do nothing with you all day, and it would be something.”

Over a year into dating TBID, I’m starting to get itchy. Some article I once read talked about

how new love is intoxicating, but lovers develop a tolerance over time. That explains those

moments when the person who made your heart skip a beat starts raising your blood pressure.

You realize your significant other has the potential to be significantly annoying.

“If he says ‘initiative’ in five syllables one more time,” you tell yourself, “I am so outta


Still, TBID rarely annoys me. (We’ll give that a few more months). What does bother me

is that I worry that we don’t spend enough time together. Then again, that may be why this

relationship is working. Is that a problem?

Do two committed people who live five express stops from each other normally talk

everyday? TBID and I don’t always. Because we both have our own creative and professional

pursuits outside of our jobs, we often spend one weekend day apart and one together. During

the work-week, we’ll generally see each other once.

This wasn’t the case in my previous relationship. Giddy goo-ga in the beginning, the

ex-boyfriend and I spent a ridiculous amount of time together. The fall I began tutoring and

freelancing, he started to complain that I always seemed distracted and that we didn’t spend

as much time together. But my new pursuits thrilled me. The relationship, for various reasons,

slowly gathered dust and eventually became something I used to be in.

Alone time is a godsend and a necessity, even more so for me than TBID. Yet I wish I could

demarcate what time is his, mine, and ours with ours somehow growing at the same time as our

creative output. It’s not balancing the national budget or anything, but it’s hard.

The latest initiative (that’s “initiative” in four syllables) in our relationship is a shared

Google calendar and list of stuff to do. This way, neither TBID nor I can ever shrug and resolve

that, “Nope. There’s absolutely nothing to do in NYC today.” The list includes boxes for who

thought of the idea, where it is, when it is, price, and why on Earth you’d want to do this

activity as a couple.

No one has used, “Because we’re dating, so you just have to” in that last box yet, though

I’m certainly considering it for this Make Your Own Yarn Animals workshop I heard about.

Events go on the calendar after we’ve officially IMed, emailed, or mentioned them to each

other and received a yes.

This new system has been successful so far. The best part of this is that TBID came up with

the system - not me, the control freak. No wonder he’s always toward the top of my to-do list.


TwiTTeR is THe new fACeBOOk. fOllOw OuR TweeTs AT


we weRe jusT kiDDinG, fACeBOOk. nO AMOunT Of TweeTs

CAn eVeR RePlACe YOu. BeCOMe A fAn Of THe PRinTeD BlOG BY

seARCHinG fOR us On THe BesT sOCiAl neTwORkinG siTe On THe


The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300

Kaisern Chen | tpburl.com/dkpsqg

kim shows off her sunBurn!

By liz | 4/17/09 | TheseBootsaremadeforstalking.com tpburl.com/mdfby8

Kim Kardashian needs some aloe vera asap!

The reality-TV star posted photos on her blog of her extreme sunburn from falling asleep in

the sun in Mexico.

“PLEASE HELP ME! I am so sunburned!” Kardashian wrote on her Twitter page. “I fell asleep

with huge glasses on yesterday! This tan line is not ok!!!”

She added, “I’m going to have to hide from cameras for days. I usually never get red, I

always get dark. It hurts!”

She then asks for some post-burning advice, “Do u guys have any remedies I can try to

help ease the pain and get rid of the redness? … I will never wear sunglasses when sunbathing


Go with the spray tan next time Kim!


wind-uP viBraTor gives greener orgasms

Zoltan Fodor | tpburl.com/rfzk0x

By simon Crisp | 4/27/09 | newlite tpburl.com/k35604

A vibrator powered by a hand

crank (no pun intended) has gone on

sale as the world’s first wind-up sex toy.

Makers say the ‘Earth Angel

Vibrator’ is made from recycled

materials and can give an hour of

eco-gasmic power for 8 minutes of


Users wind a built-in handle to

charge the £65 device and can select

from 4 speeds of vibration or store the energy for another time.

One user said: “It feels good to be doing my bit for the environment and now my husband

doesn’t keep asking what we need all the batteries for when we are at the supermarket.”

Bonny Hall of sex toy website LoveHoney added: “It may sound like a wind-up, but going green

has never been this sexy.”

“i Tell my husBand i’m going To The gym & insTead go To a

Pole danCing Class.”

By Brandy | 4/27/09 | it’s like i’m... mmmagic! tpburl.com/jhtsdg

It’s Monday, so you know the drill. Read past Monday (or Sunday!) posts in January,

February and March to get caught up. Also remember to keep the secrets coming and let other

people know about the project. I thought it was interesting that this week there were TWO

submissions (sent within hours of each other) both relating to the Vegas meet up!

1. I am secretly married. My family has no idea. They do not like my husband. We have a child

together. I have no idea how to break the news to them. I cannot live this lie anymore….

2. I’ve been having some gynaecological issues the past couple of years. I wouldn’t mind if it

turned out I was infertile, because then I would have a valid reason for not ever giving birth to

something without being judged for it. The whole pregnancy thing terrifies me.

3. I’m at a point in life where I feel like I have no friends. So many have moved away or simply

moved on. I’m lonely for girlfriends, and I wish I remembered how to make them.

4. I’d like to go to the Bloggers in Sin City meetup, but don’t think I’m cool enough.

5. In all my friendships, I am always the better friend. The one who tries harder, gives more,

listens longer. Telling someone they need to be a better friend makes me sound like I’m in

primary school but I’m exhausted.

6. I read the secret last week about someone admitting they had a blog crush. I have one too.

I’m 100% male with a crush on a female blogger and am not sure I should tell her. I wonder if

the girl from last week was talking about me?

7. I totally want to go to the blogging meet up in Vegas but I feel like everyone already is friends

and I’m the odd man (well, okay woman) out.

8. I never masturbate. Ever. I always hear about girls being shy about how much they get off, but

unless I’m having actual sex with someone else- it just doesn’t happen. I feel like such a freak

for admitting this but I have no idea how to make myself “happy”.

9. I’ve been blogging for six years and my blogroll is out of control. I want to delete it but feel like

I will hurt a lot of people’s feelings if I do. And I know someone will tell me that people really

won’t care if they are deleted if you explain why- and I have to say (here’s my second secret!!),

I’m always sort of bummed out when I’m deleted from someone else’s blogroll so I’m trying

to avoid making people feel how I felt.

10. I sometimes buy clothes, wear them (with the tags hidden!) and return them for cash.


ChirP off

For each issue we post a question on our twitter feed and these are your answers.

post your opinion to our questions and you might be featured in our next issue at


@THePRinTeDBlOG AskeD: if YOu COulD nAMe susAn BOYle’s fiRsT

AlBuM, wHAT wOulD YOu CAll iT?

@breeanelyse Songs From Behind the Paper Bag

@tjwrighter “Swan Song”

@edwarddomain Susan's 1st album: "I told you fu**ers I was good!”

@danielcollins “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful”

@rushbomb “Like a Fine Wine”

@Jayferris Boyle Poppin’: Susan re-imagines 13 Britney Spears classics.

@Braxtonmedia Susan Boyle: Hag to Riches

@msdarkstar The Melody of True Beauty

@hollywoodjane Scotch & Soda.

@clevelandsaplum “this record better get me bloody laid”

andreas de lara | tpburl.com/8r4063

Kaisern Chen | tpburl.com/dkpsqg

VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 11

LOs angELEs

tinseltown tease: “tone it uP”

by Jessica | 4/24/09 | shady sadie tpburl.com/742xsp

Here’s a little story I’ve been wanting to share with you for some time. Not-so-little known

fact: this Jew is an on-again off-again exotic dancer, and when times get tough, the tough get

the girls out. And the times, friends, have indeed been tough.

We’re through the rough patch, but earlier this spring, I found myself assed-out and with

nowhere to turn but down.

DownTOWN, that is! And so, at 2 p.m. on a Wednesday, dressed in heels and a cleavagebearing

half-shirt (always keep it classy), I pulled into the parking lot of the Spearmint Rhino,

located in the lower asshole of downtown L.A.

If you’re unfamiliar with the world of exotic dance, you might be under the mistaken

impression that a place with the word “Rhino” in it isn’t the most upscale joint around. But

au contraire. It’s actually staffed by chicks with the bounciest breasts and fakest smiles in the

industry. I didn’t go in there with any misconceptions about my chances of getting hired, but at

the same time, I figured, why not aim high?

I went in coifed and made up. The bouncer directed me up a set of stairs to the dressing

room. I changed into my bikini, scoping the competition in the process (a MILF and an 18-yearold),

made haste back downstairs, and greeted the DJ. First song topless, second song naked.

I had never actually danced fully naked, by the way. I’ve been a titties and bikini kind of

gal thus far, thanks in no small part to the crippling laws surrounding Los Angeles strip clubs.

So half of it was new to a Jew. Song one, tits out. Song two; my bottoms came off and all I

felt was a cool breeze on my outer (and, briefly, inner) labia. Nothing different but the wind.

Anyway, I thought I did a nice little number. I worked in a few pole tricks (never putting

my lady parts on the pole though, I don’t know, that grosses me out). I moved slow, the guy

sitting at the stage wearing serial killer bifocals tipped me. Wonderful. I walked off the stage

butt-ass, stepped into my bottoms on the stairs and checked in with the very chubby DJ.

“Go get dressed and then wait for the manager.”

Pause for effect. If you think that the words “go get dressed” are a bad sign for a stripper,

you are correct.

For a second I tried talking him out of making me get dressed, but DJ’s don’t like to do the

manager’s dirty work, so finally I gave it up and did the Walk of Shame up to the dressing room.

I tried to avoid eye contact with the skinny MILF, who now represented all of my own personal


Dressed, packed, and walked back down.

Finally, the manager showed. The man was a sphere. A perfect sphere. A sphere with a

moustache, to be exact. He was short and round, like that chick from Willy Wonka who turns

into a fucking blueberry. Had I knocked him over and kicked him in the side, his fat ass would

have rolled out the door. And here’s what this motherfucker tells me:

“Right now, I’m pretty full, so I probably won’t be hiring for another few months (that’s a

classic strip club manager lie, btw). So, I had the chance to watch your first song from my office.

You move well, but you need to…you know…tone it up.”

Oh my fucking god.

“Tone it…tone what up? My body??”

“Yeah. So you know, if you want to work on that and then come back in a few months,

maybe we can see then.”

First of all, are you fucking kidding me?? Come back in a few months? If I’m going to be

building up job skills over the course of several months, it is not going to be so that I can try to

get hired at another strip club. I’ll kill you.

Second of all, I really wish that I had said, “How dare you,” because I’ve always wanted to

say that to someone and mean it. But I didn’t have my wits about me, and so instead I shook his

hand, thanked him, and left.

Walk of Shame, the sequel, out to the parking lot. At this point, my confidence was more

than bruised. What am I going to do - go to the reject’s club? The home for ugly strippers?

Couldn’t he have just told me they were full and sent me on my way?

The good news is that I didn’t let the Sphere’s comment throw me into a complete and

total downward spiral of self-hatred, which I would have at other points in my life. I think that

speaks to my maturity, my sense of self. And frankly, while this may seem like the time for a

feminist analysis of the sex industry, in fact it is not. It’s just too fucking obvious. Yeah, unfair

standards of beauty, narrow concept of what men want, etc. etc. The thing is that it all really

leads me back to one, simple sentiment: FUCK that guy.

As Julia Roberts once said, BIG mistake. HUGE! Let’s be real - I am an amazing dancer (Jew),

and I know how to hustle. As such, I was immediately snatched up (haha, no pun intended) by

a wiser strip club manager, one with far better taste.

And, p.s., I toned up absolutely nothing. Take THAT.



gaspar marquez | tpburl.com/5svywz

Kari otero | tpburl.com/qrz1sh


Red Ribbon Bake Shop

Categories: Bakeries

Location: 138 S. Vermont Ave, Los Angeles, CA 90004


See all Los Angeles reviews at www.yelp.com/la

thE PrintEd bLOg is PrintEd by JOhn s. sWiFt CO., inC. WWW.JOhnsWiFtPrint.COM (847) 465-3300


May W. says, “I've driven by this place so many times, but never knew it existed until yesterday.

Apparently, this location is really small compared to the other Reb Ribbons. I haven't been to

any other location so I can't compare, but this was definitely a really, really tiny shop. The

parking situation was really, really bad, but at least it was free.

Anyway, I had to pick up a giant 3/4 mango cake for an alumni event I attended last night and let

me tell you, everyone RAVED about the cake. I'm not usually a big fan of cake, but I had to

agree with all the compliments I heard. The cake was moist, fluffy, and had a nice subtle hint of

mango to it. It was not overpowering, but I wish they would have added slices of real mango to

it instead of just flavoring the cake with...uhh, I don't know (but it tasted like mango!!).

I don't know how much the cake cost so I can't speak about the price. However, I can tell you

about the service. Everyone in the bake shop was very friendly and greeted me the moment I

walked in. The manager even helped me bring the large cake to my car. I'm really glad he did

because that thing was huge and I have a poor vestibular system (I lose my balance for no

reason sometimes. Seriously.).”









Jason shannon and bob


Key Club


keane, mat kearney

hollywood palladium


van morrison/astral weeks

orpheum theatre


the dead

la forum










LOs angELEs EvEnts

shiny toy guns

Club nokia


alela diane/mariee sioux



the shins

hollywood palladium



whisky a go-go


see what is happening in Los angeles at eventful.com/Losangeles

Janka mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj

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