WEEK OF May 7, 2009 los angeles edition Vol 1 no 14
sPheres of influence
by Will Campbell | 4/25/09 | Los angeles Metblogs tpburl.com/g3xw20
It’s become something of an annual tradition these last few years for me one afternoon
each spring to detour on my bike commute home to the Exposition Park Rose Garden and
wander in the waning light of day along and among the multitudes and varieties of blooms —
at least until the security patrol cruises by and gets on his PA to tell me to get out because for
some grade-A WTF? the rose garden is only open until 5:30 p.m. Why the hell that place isn’t
open and accessible until sunset I have no idea.
As usual before getting the boot I pixelized some of the flora, the snaps of which are
available for viewing here at my Flickr photoset, but the bonus that I found on the garden’s
promenade is what I’m more interested in sharing with you (slightly biggifiable if clicked or
view the set here on Flickr):
It’s a free exhibition that debuted on Earth Day this past week called Cool Globes, and it
features some 32 spheres measuring five feet in diameter remarkably transformed with a variety
of materials by a range of artists as well as school kids to create awareness about global warming.
“Cool Globes” will be in place at Exposition Park through July 23.
Afterwards I biked to a much more somber occasion, the ghost bike memorial for Jesus
Castillo, killed while bicycling on Glendale Boulevard April 19. Jesus Castillo, a 44-year-old
resident of Echo Park was killed dy a driver who struck him and then fled the scene. Thanks
to witnesses who recorded the vehicle’s license number, the driver was later arrested and
determined not only to be operating a vehicle with a suspended license, but police say he
was driving under the influence at the time of the accident. Pix from the gathering of several
hundred cyclists at the memorial created by my friends Dan Berlant and Stephen Roullier are
And if you’re in the mood for some timelapsed video of the the whole bike commute you
can watch that unfold from the perspective of my handlebarcam over here on YouTube.
LiKE thE intErnEt, OnLy FLaMMabLE
insidE this issuE:
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gaspar marquez | tpburl.com/5svywz
katie couric and cbs news get creative
with social media
tabitha hale talks about
the meghan mccain goP
Kaisern Chen | tpburl.com/dkpsqg
laurel dailey | tpburl.com/0fwm9q
how a grownuP handles a meltdown at
the clinic written bY the bloggess
swine flu 101
By Plug1 | 4/29/09 | what i’m seeing dot com tpburl.com/yct1rj
The current swine flu outbreak is the spread of a new strain of the H1N1 influenza virus
that was first detected by public health agencies late last month. Outbreaks of an influenzalike
illness were first detected in three areas of Mexico, but the new strain was not clinically
identified as such until a month later in Texas and California, whereupon its presence was
swiftly confirmed in various Mexican states, the U.S. and several other Northern Hemisphere
countries. This week, the new strain was confirmed in Canada, Spain, the United Kingdom, New
Zealand and Israel and suspected in many other nations, including South Korea and Austria,
with over 2,500 candidate cases, prompting the WHO to raise their pandemic alert level to 4.
By the way, a level 4 warning officially means that the WHO considers that there is
“sustained human to human transmission;” whereas levels 5 and 6 represent “widespread
Symptoms include fever, cough, sore throat, body aches, headache, chills and fatigue.
The current outbreak has shown an increased percentage of patients reporting diarrhea and
The CDC recommends the use of Tamiflu or Relenza for the treatment and/or prevention of
infection with swine influenza viruses, however, the majority of people infected with the virus
make a full recovery without requiring medical attention or antiviral drugs.
follow swine flu’s sPread using google maPs
By nicholas deleon | 4/27/09 | Crunchgear tpburl.com/wf73td
This has been a very exciting year for
things-that-could-kill-us. First it was the
economy that could kill us all; then it was
those Somali pirates who posed a threat to
our very way of life; and now we all should
fear swine flu. Why should we fear la grippe
porcine? Well, it seems to be spreading
around the world pretty swiftly, and it’s
doing a pretty thorough job of wreaking
havoc in Mexico. So, here’s a map!
This Google Map shows confirmed and suspected cases of the virus, H1N1 Swine Flu, as
well as deaths caused by the virus.
As always, Twitter is fairly interesting, watching people freak out in real time.
And, if you’d like hype-free news about Swine Flu, may I suggest Science’s blog? Science’s
coverage is less alarmist than the likes of AP, Reuters, etc.
and you can too
Michael Rivera | tpburl.com/k68jmv
GOT sOMeTHinG TO sAY? suBMiT YOuR BlOG fOR PuBliCATiOn
TO BlOGGeRs@THePRinTeDBlOG.COM. we wOn’T GiVe YOu MOneY
(ACTuAllY, we will, BuT iT’s nOT MuCH, YeT), BuT we will GiVe YOu
A sweeT HTMl BADGe.
By natch greyes | 4/26/09 | natch greyes for senate 2020 tpburl.com/qs1k9c
Mexico, that country south of the United
States that most Americans think is a poorer
version of Canada with a drug problem. Of
course, with the Swine Flu outbreak and
subsequent media panic, most Americans now
think of Mexico as a massive quarantine area.
This post will seek to cover two major topics:
Swine Flu and Mexico’s Drug Problem. I’ll also
dry to dispel myths about both of those and
First, let’s deal with the irrational media
panic over Swine Flu. (Note: Some of this is
repetition from a previous post).
First, if you’ve never had the (normal) flu, never treated anyone with the (normal) flu, or
never heard of the flu you should look at this CDC Post for dealing with the Swine Flu. Note
that the advice is the exact same as for the Normal Flu.
[Edit: This Section Deleted, please refer to this post instead]
Also, watch the video below, see the long lines? That’s the Mexican health care system, it’s
no surprise that there is a high death rate (although we won’t know more for sure until we get
Further, you need to realize that (generally) the more rapid the spread of a certain strain of
the flu, the less deadly is that strain. (Think about it: would the strain spread very far if it killed
a high percentage of those who got infected?) Right now, the percentage of deaths for Mexico,
which is bound to be higher than in the U.S., is lower than the typical flu in the U.S. And, there
have been no deaths in the United States. So, panicking (besides not accomplishing anything
anyway) is really, really stupid.
But why, you ask, is this disease spreading so rapidly through Mexico and why does it seem
to be cropping up in certain places in the United States? Well, the outbreak started in Mexico
City, which is a densely packed population. All variants of the flu, like the common cold, are
‘crowd diseases.’ They cannot exist and generally do not spread if originating in isolated, rural
populations. That’s why new strains of the flu typically originate in Asia and South America,
where 3rd World conditions allow the propagation of the disease. Further, this variant of the
Swine Flu most certainly originated in a place where pigs and other farm animals are kept close
by humans, i.e. a 3rd World Style Pig Farm, which, as we know from the Avian Flu makes it
more likely for a human to catch a variant of a disease affecting primarily some other species.
It’s a sad but true fact that since the people who live there don’t understand the concepts of
basic sanitation and therefore don’t employ sanitation techniques that theirs is the place where
these diseases originate, rather than say, North America or Western Europe.
This all relates to the War on Drugs because the effect the Drug Cartels have had on the
development of Mexico and the Mexican economy. Half the Mexican economy is made of
informal sector (Black Market) jobs. While this is, in large part, street vendors, the Drug Cartels
rake in an estimated $30 billion a year. This money is dispersed as payoffs to police officers and
other drug enforcement officers, resulting in the military having to be used to combat the drug
trade. This, in turn, puts pressure on the Mexican government to fight them as well as find new
sources of revenue to help combat both the money and guns of the Cartels. Unfortunately, in
most places, the Cartels are more powerful than the government and thus violence breaks out
whenever the government tries to wretch back control.
This affects the Swine Flu because first, all drugs weaken the immune system (cold
medicines simply repress your immune system on purpose) and so the flu can spread more
easily. And, since Drug Cartels smuggle people over the border illegally (as side work) they can
also assist in the spread of the disease to various places in the United States.
Also, since the Mexican government is concerned with fighting the War on Drugs it
doesn’t have the extra funds necessary to improve Mexico’s infrastructure, health care or, really,
anything else. And, it’s not likely that the Drug Cartels are going to improve anything other
than what helps them funnel drugs to North America (primarily the United States).
adverTising Bryan Feir | tpburl.com/h5nksm
The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300
Shane Walsh | tpburl.com/rx47fw
iT’s like we’Re liVinG On THe
OReGOn TRAil exCePT nOne Of us
HAs DYsenTeRY YeT
By The Bloggess | 4/21/09 | TheBloggess.com tpburl.com/s5tpg4
Yesterday Hailey’s preschool called to tell me that she had a rash on her stomach and
back so I picked her up and I figured it was probably just a reaction from new detergent but I
thought I’d run her by the Readi-Clinic just in case because it was on the way home and also
there’s a pretzel shop right next to it but when I got there the doctor was all “Uh, this kid has
scarlet fever” and I’m all “The fuck?! Like what Beth died from in Little Women?” except I said
it quietly so Hailey wouldn’t hear me and the doctor was all “It’s very treatable now. Don’t
panic” and I’m all “You know, just because I’m at a Readi-Clinic doesn’t mean I don’t have
money. We have great insurance. I just came here because I wanted a pretzel” and the doctor
was all “No, really. Scarlet Fever isn’t a big deal anymore. It’s basically strep throat with a
rash. Calm down” and I’m all “I AM FUCKING CALM” but I just said that in my head because
I didn’t want to freak out Hailey. Then Hailey’s all “Can I have a Popsicle?” and I’m like “We
are going to set all your stuffed animals on fire when we get home” and then the doctor started
laughing and I’m all “I AM DEADLY SERIOUS” and Hailey said we couldn’t throw Donkey on
the bonfire because he’s her favorite and I’m all “Donkey is the germiest. We’re going to burn
him twice” and then Hailey and the doctor both looked at me like I’m the crazy one and I’m all
“Fine. He’s going in the washing machine. Like, for eighteen cycles.” Then the doctor gave us
a prescription for amoxicillin which is like the sad, weird kid of the antibiotic family and I’m
all “What is this, bush-league? I told you, I have money.” Then he made us leave and I was so
upset that I didn’t even remember to get a pretzel, so basically we’re all suffering.
PS. Hailey is fine and is running around like normal and everything in the entire house is
going in the dishwasher. Then I’m going to burn the dishwasher in an abandoned field. I may
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ReADinG is HARD. PiCTuRes ARe PReTTY. suBMiT YOuR
BReATHTAkinG PHOTOs TO PHOTOs@THePRinTeDBlOG.COM.
i Tried To make This PosT gender neuTral
By matt | 4/27/09 | a view from 5280ft tpburl.com/hbnycx
I learned something about myself Friday night.
I learned that, when I’m in an argument, I go for the kill right away. Meaning, if I am in
disagreement with someone and it’s totally obvious that we are going to get into debate, I will
deliver my best line first. Before the other person gets a chance to even think about his (or
hers, because I believe in equality) first argument, BOOM- I hit him or her with the low blow. A
verbal rabbit punch to the back of his or her head. Before they even expected it.
And when I say rabbit punch, please don’t picture a little bunny trying to punch someone.
Thats not what it means.
Him/Her: Waterboy was by FAR Adam Sandler’s best movie.
Me: Get the fuck out of here. Out of all four of Sandler’s movies (I don’t count most of his
movies as real movies), an ice skater turned golfer is by far the funniest thing he has thought
of. In all of his movies he pretty much takes a guy and turns him into something different. He
takes a drunk and turns him into a teacher, he takes a hockey player and turns him into a golfer,
he takes a waterboy and turns him into a football player, he takes an asshole and turns him into
a lawyer (I know, not much of a difference, right? HEY OH. Sorry lawyers out there… I was just
kidding). It’s the same shit over and over so I am going to go with the movie with the most cuss
words and call it the best. If there was any nudity, it would trump the cuss words but there’s
not. So there you have it.
Do you see what I did there? At the first sign of there being a debate ahead, I went in and
took care of bid-ness. This strategy is always sure to end an argument before it begins and it is
a sure way to win. If this strategy does not work for you, another strategy I use is to talk louder
than the other person. It’s pretty simple- whatever they say, just talk louder than him (or her)
while he (or she) is saying it. That way, people really only hear you.
So there you have it. I hope these strategies work for you as well as they work for me.
I didn’t count but I hope I got in like, at least 5 “him/her’s” in this post.
Chrystel garipuy | tpburl.com/rswmzh
if YOu Miss OuR THuRsDAY MORninG DisTRiBuTiOn Of THe
PRinTeD BlOG, VisiT www.THePRinTeDBlOG.COM TO DOwnlOAD THe
newsPAPeR fOR THe nexT 100 YeARs.
Janka Mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj
VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 3
inVesTinG in YOuR kiDs’ sTuff
By Jennifer openshaw | 3/31/09 | Blogher.com tpburl.com/hcxk51
Where do investment ideas come from? Something you read in the paper? Something your
broker, or maybe a friend, recommended?
Here’s a thought: What about trying to get some tips from your kids? It can happen.
Any parent who drives children around all day has an all-access pass to a special world —
the world of young consumers. If you listen, you’ll hear what they want, what they are buying,
and — of course — what they want you to buy them. Pay attention to what’s happening in their
world, and you might come up with some good investment ideas of your own (for more on this,
read Rogers Park Montessori School: New Kids on the Stock).
Smells like teen spirit: “Axe — I smell it everywhere,” the mother of a 14-year-old boy
told me. “Axe body spray, Axe body wash, Axe deodorant, Axe hair gel… you get the idea. They
make everything. And every teenaged boy wears that scent.” Axe is everywhere, but where
does it come from? It’s one of the myriad of products made by Dutch consumer products giant
Unilever (UL), traded in the U.S. as an ADR. You know Unilever — they’re the same folks who
bring you your SlimFast.
They wear it well: Under Armour’s (UA) aggressive marketing campaign has apparently
caught on with young boys on the field. Under Armour makes “performance apparel” for sports
like basketball, football, and soccer, and kids wear it with pride. The company recently entered
the running-shoe arena, setting its sights on Nike. Will it succeed?
School of Roxy: The girls who are watching the guys who smell like Axe and wear tight
Under Armour t-shirts are wearing Roxy t-shirts. Sounds like an eighties band, I know, but
it’s one of the many skate/snow board apparel labels owned by surf pioneer Quiksilver (ZQK).
Teenaged girls love Roxy’s tiny t-shirts and hoodies.
Betwixt and Be Tween: Aeropostale (ARO) is a mall store that mothers of tween girls know
all too well. The mother of three young girls told me recently that she’s there so often she’s
memorized the layout of the store near them.
So the next time you get dragged to the store by your children, think of it as research. Who
knows, your next great investment idea might just pop out of one of those shopping bags. It’s a
great example of investing in what you know.
THe wORlD is full Of inTeResTinG PeOPle. fOR eACH issue we PiCk A
uniQue PeRsOn TO PROfile. sHARe YOuR iDeAs ABOuT sOMeOne TO PROfile
BY wRiTinG PROfile@THePRinTeDBlOG.COM.
a passionate advocate for working
americans, Jennifer openshaw is cofounder
of stock education site weseed
(www.weseed.com), author of a new
book, The millionaire Zone, and a seasoned
expert in finance and investing. she appears
regularly on oprah, good morning america
and Cnn and has been featured in the new
york Times, usa Today and Business week.
Jennifer has lived her own “rags to riches”
story, getting her first job as a maid in a
motel when she was 14 years old to help
support her family. from these humble but
determined beginnings, she launched and
propelled her career in financial services,
with an mBa from uCla and a job as press
secretary for California’s state Treasurer.
Jennifer has since worked as vice president at Bank of america, senior vice president
of corporate marketing at Bank one, head of marketing for investment firm wilshire
associates, and chief executive of family financial network.
she has gone on to start several successful ventures. in 1999, Jennifer founded women’s
financial network, a financial services company created for women. she now serves as
president of weseed, designed to help people use their passions and professions to make
better investment decisions.
Jennifer also is host of aBC radio’s “winning advice,” aol’s family financial editor and a
member of the young entrepreneurs organization. The governor of California has appointed
her to the prestigious Commission on California state government organization and
as a proven entrepreneur and powerful voice for “the little guy,” Jennifer knows that
ordinary people often have limited resources but unlimited aspirations. her life’s mission
is to share her secrets of how successful people get ahead and empower middle-income
americans to reach their financial dreams.
GOOGle’s CeO GeTs An OffiCiAl
seAT AT PResiDenT OBAMA’s TABle
By adam ostrow | 4/27/09 | mashable tpburl.com/8zc3js
The close ties between Google CEO Eric Schmidt and President Barack Obama are welldocumented.
Schmidt endorsed Obama’s Presidential campaign, and in the months since he has
taken office, the leader of the world’s most popular search engine has also been a guest at the
White House to discuss policy alongside some of the country’s top economists and financiers.
Although Schmidt quickly took his name out of the running to become CTO of the USA
after Obama was elected, today, he’s been officially named to a new role: that of a member of
President’s Council of Advisors on Science and Technology.
That group, according to a statement issued today by The White House, will advise
the President on “[formulating] policy in the many areas where understanding of science,
technology, and innovation is key to strengthening our economy and forming policy that works
for the American people.”
It’s worth noting that Craig Mundie, Chief Research and Strategy Officer at Microsoft,
is also on the list of advisers, so fear of Google getting unfair sway with the nation’s Chief
Executive are probably a bit unfounded.
Nonetheless, it probably doesn’t sit well with those that think Google already has just a bit
too much power that the company’s CEO will now have a seat at the President’s table in a role
that will clearly help define tech policy going forward.
kATie COuRiC AnD CBs news GeT
CReATiVe wiTH fACeBOOk PAGes
By Jennifer van grove | 4/22/09 | mashable tpburl.com/43ymbn
Hi there, Facebookers! Katie Couric has a video challenge for you. The CBS Evening News
anchor is putting the upgraded Facebook Pages to good use.
In a 48 second video clip posted to her page, Couric explains that she’s going to be
taking stock of President Barack Obama’s first 100 days in office, and she needs your help (and
Facebook juice) to do it.
The challenge, should you choose to accept, is to create a 20 second video on what
Obama’s done wrong or right while in office, and post it to her Facebook Page. The best videos
will be included in a live broadcast from CBSNews.com on April 29 at 7pm EST.
Even though Couric acknowledges that she’s crossing into trendier territories by stating
“my daughters think it’s really funny I have a Facebook Page…funny weird,” we still think
that she’s doing a fantastic job combining her star power with social media savvy to raise her
profile on Facebook and grow the CBS audience through potentially viral channels. The power
of massive comments, likes, and user-created Facebook videos, is that the CBS message gets
dispersed to new audiences (friends of friends) with every act of sharing.
Oddly enough, we’re unable to share the video with you here due to Facebook’s archaic
video sharing limitations (you can only share videos with your Facebook network on Facebook).
But, should you be interested in participating in the challenge, you can watch the video and
She’s already hip to YouTube and Digg, now Facebook, so what’s next Couric? A 140
character Twitter challenge (she’s already tweeting as @katiecouric) perhaps? That sounds fun.
reCession gaming: Two hyPer-addiCTive free games
By danielle riendeau | 4/16/09 | gamertell tpburl.com/3n48vx
There’s nothing sweeter than finding fun
on the cheap - or better - for free, especially
when it comes to videogames. Now that
everyone is weary about spending (yes, the
economy is ruining everything, and no one
is immune), finding good, free web-based
games has become a hobby for many. I’m here
to point you in the direction of two that are
particularly compelling - for entirely different
The first, I have to admit, is something
I stumbled on while reading Kotaku. ScaryGirl, as it’s called is a robust, gorgeous platformer/
adventure game that looks and plays as if Psychonauts had a baby with Super Mario Brothers
and the old Beetlejuice cartoon was somehow involved. It’s as full-featured (and beautifully
animated) as a good full-priced game, so the fact that you can play it for free - and in your
browser - is pretty fantastic.
On the other end of the spectrum is the juvenile, hilarious Don’t Sh*t Your Pants, which is
a text-based adventure game (though the creators have dubbed it “survival horror”). It centers
on a very simple - and nasty - premise (don’t do number two in your pants) and stars a crudely
drawn dude who looks like he started out life in MS Paint, but no matter - the fact that there
are about nine “achievements” to earn will have you playing until you figure them all out. I
seriously could not stop playing this last night - though I’m not sure what that says about me.
I dare you to try these games and not feel gratified - and if you hate them, well, it didn’t
cost you a penny.
The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300
i do noT undersTand These words
By michelle woo | 4/23/09 | michelle woo tpburl.com/4195x3
J. Cook photography | tpburl.com/f67ngz
THe wAll PROjeCT
By Joshua karp | 4/30/09 | The Printed Blog tpburl.com/bp3w29
It’s no secret that communication technologies are bridging geographical and cultural gaps.
With a little creativity, they are also proving they have the power to do much more.
In the Phillipines, for example, large-scale demonstrations organized via cell phones and
SMS helped force President Joseph Estrada’s resignation, thus bringing about major political
change without violence.
At the Northwood School in London, students use video conferencing technology to
interact with pupils at primary schools in the U.S. and China. The children are quickly able to
develop more intimate levels of cultural appreciation as a result, learning about Thanksgiving
from children in Texas, and practicing Tai Chi with children in Hong Kong.
The service Videoletters.net captures video messages from former neighbors and friends
throughout the war-torn countries of the Former Yugoslavia, broadcasting them via public
access channels so those who lost contact during conflict can reconnect.
While remarkable and inspiring, these innovative examples lack the power and appeal of
firsthand, personal experience. We do not live in a world of avatars. Our facial expressions are
not emoticons. Existing interfaces for navigating the virtual world continue to evolve, but they
are no substitute for real world interaction.
But what if technology could be harnessed to bend the rules? What if there was an
innovative communications solution that could blur the line between virtual and real world
interaction? What if there was a way to enable large-scale, face-to-face interactions between
citizens all over the world…in real-time? It would be like opening a window into another part of
Well, that window exists. And that window is a wall.
The Wall is a groundbreaking new project that aims to tear down geographic and cultural
barriers like never before via the construction of monumental “smart” walls in locations around
the globe. Designed to serve as audio-visual gateways, citizens of the world will be able to
see, hear, and interact with their international ‘neighbors’ in an open forum that promotes
empathy, dialogue, and unprecedented human collaboration.
Sound like a lofty goal? The Wall’s inspiring and ambitious mission is founded upon
concrete, achievable pillars set forth by Joshua Karp – entrepreneur, optimist and founder of The
Printed Blog. Joshua believes that the greatest opportunities to change the world start with one
person, a single idea, and the belief that anything is possible.
In 50 cities around the world, 50 interactive video walls will be constructed in large,
open and accessible urban hubs. The walls will be approximately 1000 feet long by 50 feet tall
by 15 feet thick. They will be built using high definition monitors, video cameras, speakers,
and microphones. They will be constructed to be impervious to weather and vandalism, and
designed with respect to each individual city’s unique heritage and urban plan.
How will these walls work? They will interface in tandem with sister walls in other
cities according to a rotation of eight-hour intervals, with schedules made public through a
A man in Chicago will meet face-to-face and interact in real-time with a woman in New
Delhi. A boy in Mosul will play rock, paper, scissors with a girl in Amsterdam. Speeches,
lectures, rallies, protests, discussions, concerts, classes, field trips, commerce, games, love affairs,
arguments and more will occur across the wall…and across the world.
The Wall will inevitably bear witness to horrors and atrocities as well. Thus, it will ensure
we do not turn a blind eye to murder, theft, persecution and injustice. Imagine how much faster
violence would end and peace would come if people stopped averting their eyes.
The Wall presents an opportunity to dissolve barriers between cultures and create an
environment of global discourse on an unprecedented scale. A strong global community
begins with citizens capable of facing realities honestly – and those realities can only be fully
understood through real world interaction.
Where the Internet has facilitated virtual world interaction on a global scale, the Wall
will encourage real world interaction on the same scale. Something remarkable and inspiring,
THis jusT in: THe CuRRenT jOB MARkeT is Awful. we CAn HelP YOu finD
YOuR wAY OuT Of YOuR BATHROBe AnD inTO A GReAT new jOB. senD
A COuPle senTenCes ABOuT YOuRself, YOuR linkeDin PROfile, AnD A
PiCTuRe TO HiReMe@THePRinTeDBlOG.COM.
noTe To readers
Tim yuen / Copywriter
Went to new york to look for a job as a copywriter, came back to Chicago a few
months later due to the economic recession. now working out thanks to my p90x
routine but would rather write copy for advertising agency. Check out my work/
resume at www.timyuenportfolio.com
Bob Johnson / photographer
My photography and writing has been published in the new york times, Star
magazine, newsday, timeout/ny, the new york Resident, playbill.com and more.
My photos also have been featured on aBC’s the View and tMZ. i am seeking a
position that will combine my photography, writing and video skills so that i can
continue to follow my passions in life. http://www.linkedin.com/in/bittenbyazebra
Cover photo Correction
the printed Blog mislabeled the cover photograph
credit in the Chicago loop edition of Vol1 no13. the
correct photographer’s name is Michal Czerwonka. We
regret the error.
“like the internet, only flammable.”
this tagline was submitted by Marc Muszynski, a
runner-up in our tagline contest.
VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 5
CATCH A GReen fliCk AT A sOlAR
POweReD MOVie THeATeR
By stephanie rogers | 4/26/09 | earthfirst.com tpburl.com/v4fwsx
Next time you’re heading out to see the latest eco flick (hey, there’s a really Oscar-worthy
looking Val Kilmer movie due sometime this year!), you could see it in a solar-powered movie
theater. At least, you can if you live in Livermore, California. Livermore Cinemas has installed
an 18,000 square foot solar installation that will reportedly provide 35% of the theater’s energy
needs, and cut its electric bill by 45%.
Alternative Consumer reports that the system will provide about 190,000 kilowatts of
electricity over the course of a year, and that installation of the system isn’t expected to impact
But even if it did – would you pay extra? I think the willingness of consumers to spend
an extra fifty cents or so per ticket would encourage more theater owners across the country to
install their own renewable energy systems. I’d definitely go out of my way to patronize a movie
theater that cares enough to install such an impressive solar array.
right off the bat, allow me to completely alienate 75% of
our readers by stating that i’m a west Coast girl, born and
raised: long Beach by way of oregon. i’ll probably die out
here, in keruoac’s “ragged promised land,” buried under
a pile of unread books, taxidermied antlers and camera
equipment. death by The Big one – an earthquake, that
is. i think about earthquakes at least three times a day,
but come hell or high water, i’m sticking to my guns.
There’s no better place to explore wild unknowns than
here: the conquered desert, embittered metropolitan
constellations under a starless sky.
i was raised in the wild suburbs of oregon and picked up a Pentax k1000 in high school.
once i got my proverbial first taste of the stench that developer chemicals leave on your
skin, i was hooked. a pile of debt and a few years of education later, i’m still shooting every
wim wenders refers to photography as “an act in two directions.” as the shutter releases,
an image is created that contains not only the subject, but also a vague shadow of the
photographer. as The Printed Blog’s Photo editor, it has been my pleasure to cull the depths
of the interwebs to bring you the very best acts in two directions; both the images and the
artists who created them.
an act of defiance in the face of a whimpering economy deserves to be applauded, and
so i’m giving you a standing ovation, TPB, as well as you, the readers, who’ve made this
venture a success thus far. while i’m taking my final bow as Photo editor, i’m confident
that The Printed Blog will blaze right on ahead, exploring those ragged promised lands we
all long for.
Janka Mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj
If you want to see a story go popular, choose
your tweets wisely.
Be a leader and be the first to tweet breaking
news that will soon be heard around the world,
and go on to make history. Find a story,
website or resource with a funny or unique
angle that no one else has spread around yet.
Or, find interesting images that are sure to
captivate and inspire your audience.
Whatever the type of content that you choose
to tweet about, just make sure that it’s so -
awesome that it makes your followers feel they
absolutely have to share it with their friends
too, which brings us to the next point…
Read more from this guide and others at guidespot.com
The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300
it’s your spot in the universe
The Easy Guide To Making Your
Tweets Soar to Popularity
Twitter is about self expression and person-to-person communication, but its power lies in its
capacity as a broadcasting tool. A single tweet carrying the right message can make huge waves
across the Twitterverse, and also spread to other social channels on the Web. However, just
because a random tweet can go viral every once in a while, doesn't mean you can expect
everyone on Twitter to go nuts about everything that you tweet. By following these easy
recommendations, you can ensure that your tweets are of the highest quality and get the best
shot at going popular.
Make Your Tweet Count
Whether you’re a user with a moderate
following or a power user with many
thousands of followers, your tweets depend on
the community to go popular.
When you get retweeted, your story is exposed
to the networks of your friends, gaining more
potential to go popular as more users retweet
it. Not all users will be reading their timelines
at once, but it increases the chance of your
tweet being seen and clicked through.
Keep a steady flow of high quality and
interesting tweets and users will take notice.
You’ll gain a reputation for making great
tweets, get retweeted more often, and you’ll
also gain more followers.
Get Help From Your Followers
and Friends In High Places
You may be a user with a solid following who
has no problem getting retweeted, but you
would still like your content to get more
traction than 6-7 retweets and a few hundred
clicks. That’s where friends come into play.
Don’t make it a habit, but if there is something
that you are really passionate about, ask your
friends for some help.
Also, if you have a friend with a huge following
and your tweet fits their audience, ask if they
would consider a retweet. Occasionally you
may get lucky and won’t even have to ask,
especially if they follow you and take notice.
sTRAnGelY, THe MAn in THis
eleCTRifYinG PHOTO is
nOT DeAD TODAY
By Jack loftus | 4/19/09 | gizmodo tpburl.com/kpbz94
Meet Peter Terren. Inspired by The Thinker, he set
out to recreate that classic sculpture using electricity,
wire caging, a conductive foil suit, and a death wish.
Can’t forget the death wish.
Now, we’ve seen Terren and Tesla Down Under’s
work before here at Gizmodo, most notably when he
put his son in a car and zapped it with electricity.
This little project, however, put him in the hot
seat. Note the electricity shooting out of his sneaker.
Lucky for us all, Terren meticulously documented
the entire project with photos and safety-related
commentary (“The wig is not ideal and really needs
a haircut. I couldn’t light it with sparks so fire risk
dr. peter terren
Terren also outfitted some of the tests with a pentagram boundary, which had nothing to
do with Tesla coils or electricity, of course, but certainly heightened the sense of batshit insanity
surrounding this little venture.
quiCk BluB: sTake your soCial media name now
By Jack Peterson | 4/27/09 | marketing Juice tpburl.com/7wmyqv
Remember the circus of cyber
squatting domain names back in
the day? Everyone was scrambling
to own their domain names before
cyber squatters owned them and
held them for ransom $$$. A new
service called “knowem?” checks and registers your brand name, username or vanity URL in the
Social Media space (websites). I just registered my company. Register before the Social Media
land grab comes of age. Do it now or someone will hold you and your company hostage. It’s a
great service that will do all the time consuming username registering for you.
Brandon Showers | tpburl.com/b5cr3p
John parli | tpburl.com/v27zkb
ORGAn DOnOR DOlls ARe MORe
GORY THAn CuTe
By simon Crisp | 4/27/09 | newslite tpburl.com/06g2rp
An artist has created a set of vinyl figures which he hopes will encourage more people to
donate their organs.
David Foox came up with the idea for his ‘Organ Donors’ collection - dolls which
have hearts, lungs, eyeballs and brains for heads - after a family member had a double lung
While ‘Uncle Ken’ survived the op, David wanted to use his art to draw attention to organ
donation and started work on the 24 doll collection.
The £10 figures come in ‘blind boxes’ meaning the buyer does not know what they have
got until they open it ... and their gory nature could leave surprised heart attack victims needing
“Human body parts are interchangeable and as much as we know about the body, there is
so much more to learn,” said Foox from Denver.
“It is a conceptual way of dealing with our humanity - whether physical or spiritual. It is
also supposed to be a lighthearted approach to a serious, bloody, and gory issue.”
He says most people have reacted positively to seeing the figures though sometimes people
think they are “spooky” or “freaky.”
The collection can be ordered online.
THe TORTuRe PATH
By hunter | 4/21/09 | The daily kos tpburl.com/1yz8n6
I can only fathom that we are supposed to beg.
I think we are supposed to get down on our knees, even grovel for it, and beg that our
nation act in accordance with its own laws, with international laws, and with basic decency.
We among the more expendable classes are supposed to write passionate editorials; we are
supposed to form grass roots movements; we are supposed to make the usual dozens of phone
calls, and be ashamed, and debase ourselves - and then, perhaps, if we are very lucky, and if
we beg enough and with the right arguments and place enough pressure in the right, most
uncomfortable spots, then our own government will relent, and our laws will be followed, and
investigations conducted, and if warranted, those responsible will be prosecuted. And we will
finally as a nation, at long last, reject torture in practice as well as in words.
But they will not do it, unless they are bowed to it by the collective weight of their own
citizens. That seems to be, still, the message: they will not acquiesce unless bludgeoned into
doing it. It is ceded to us to decide if America will have the smallest shard of conscience, and
once again the voices of basic decency will be cast as the unreasonable ones, the foolish ones,
the troublemaking rabble pestering those that know better, and we shall have to rise above it yet
That is the only conclusion I can come to. It seems transparently obvious to Washington,
to the Obama administration and its allies, to the Republicans and the Democrats of Congress,
to all the very important people working very serious jobs, that while we can with great fanfare
and self-satisfaction no longer torture prisoners in our care -- a war crime, in any context not
involving ourselves -- it is far more challenging a proposition to think that we would actually
take steps to enforce the myriad laws and conventions against it.
And in that sense, torture by the United States of America is as good as legalized, because
we have all but declared that it will never be that illegal, the kind of illegal that leads to
investigations and punishment. It will merely remain a deplorable act -- a war crime, in any
context not involving us doing the torture -- that we will never, ever use, except when we
do, and without consequence. We will not condone it but, like in Serbia, or Guatemala, or
Cambodia, or the thugs of any one of a hundred pissant groups and countries that used the
practice to vicious effect, when to their advantage, we will ignore the laws, the treaties and
conventions, and we will not prosecute our torturers. Or, God forbid, those that specifically
ordered the practice. Or those that sought to legalize it, on pen and paper, with arguments
comprehensible only to sociopaths or monsters.
It apparently needs to be stated, yet again, that this is not a case of seeking vengeance.
When powerful people are caught in illegal acts, it is nearly always the case that they claim
prosecuting them would be “vengeance:” it never enters the minds of our leaders, whether
they be in government or in business, that perhaps the law should be applied to them simply
because it is the law. There always needs to be additional motive attributed; it goes nearly
without saying that, without the additional motives of vengeance, or revenge, or punishment
then naturally those in power are not held to the laws required of the rest of us. You know you
have arrived, in America, when you can break a law at will and have the government itself argue
against your prosecution on the grounds that doing so would be controversial or divisive.
Whether or not any of the parties involved are actually convicted, whether even a single
one of them see a day of jail time is not the question. Whether we preclude that possibility, as
policy of government, is the more damaging question. For in precluding even the possibility
of justice, we immunize the act, and if we immunize the act then it is not, in any meaningful
sense, actually illegal.
It is not about revenge: it is about demonstrating that even for the most powerful among
us, even for our own government, there are laws, and they are not optional. It is about
demonstrating that we are a country in which law has a substance that overrides the credentials
of the person breaking it. It is the brightest shining example of what we as a nation are or are
not: it is our moral measure.
Knowing that torture was condoned in our names is an abominable thing. This parlor
game of moving forward, not backward, of letting bygones be bygones, admitting error, and just
getting the hell on with our days is just as dismal, because this, finally, internalizes the message
that we citizens, our government, and other nations will take from this sorry affair, which is
that while we begrudgingly acquiesce to stopping, we will, even now, refuse to recognize the act
itself as truly criminal.
There is absolutely no pride to be gained in no longer torturing, but blocking justice in
those instances in which we have. It is no act of courage; it is no enlightened position. It is
merely the easiest path, and the one followed in nearly every instance by nations proven to
have committed foul acts. Sorry, but we’re not about to do anything about it. We’ll stop, but in
exchange for stopping we expect the episode to be forgotten. What would count as a war crime
for you other countries counts for us as an internal matter, and we consider it closed.
I do not feel like begging. After years of railing against the practice (to be largely ignored,
because in those days the majority of voices presumed torture to have positive effects, and
therefore be justified), after years of government denial that any such thing was happening (in
spite of clear and demonstrable evidence that it did), the last thing in the world that I feel like
doing is once again begging, at long last, and to the supposed reasonable people that replaced
the last reasonable people, that we actually follow our own goddamn laws, or treat crimes by
our powerful with the same grave manner as we do crimes by anyone else in the nation.
I am fucking sick of it, and I am fucking sick of hearing how we have entered a new age of
enlightenment merely because we have stopped a transparently abominable practice, one that
we condemn with vigor when undertaken by any other nation. I am fucking sick of myself,
my compatriots and the rest of the public having to act as collective conscience for all those in
power that, apparently, have long since evolved past even common sense, much less common
I know by tomorrow or next week I will relent, and I will start the cause anew, and I will
join all the others in penning yet another fervent message explaining why, at long last -- at long
fucking last -- we cannot simultaneously condemn torture and yet declare a casual, dismissive
amnesty for all those that ordered it, and planned it, and justified it, and executed it, under the
usual theory of the powerful that crimes by the powerful simply cannot be prosecuted lest chaos
or embarrassment ensue.
But for today, I can only say damn you all to hell. Damn you all for making us -- us, of all
people, average citizens with no positions of power, with no power at all save whatever we can
wring out of the thin air, and with nothing at stake but a sense of shared, basic, foundational
morality -- yet again rail for our own country to exercise a shred of the morality, the justice,
the national greatness that it professes for all to hear. I was once outraged; I was, after that,
ashamed; now I am only incredulous. With every passing day my nation acts less like a guiding
beacon, and more like a crook.
Johnny daigneault | tpburl.com/mhqcp2
VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 7
COVeR ARTisTs PlAYlisT
in the spirit of recycling, this week’s playlist features a selection of some excellent and
surprising covers. everything old is new again! For more song covers, check out www.
coversproject.com. and don’t forget to email your favorite song(s) to tpB’s Music editor
amanda nyren at anyren@theprintedblog.
“act nice and gentle” - Black Keys
Black Keys do the Kinks’ “Act Nice and Gentle” justice, adding a little
southern rock twang to the mix.
“Borderline” - the Flaming lips
The Flaming Lips’ cover of my favorite 80s Madonna hit is just as good,
if not better, than the original.
“i Poke her face” - Kid Cudi w Kanye West
Okay so this Kid Cudi/Kanye West rehash of Lady Gaga’s acoustic “Poker
Face” is really more of a sample than a cover. But when the track is this
good, why quibble?
“rave on” - M. Ward
M. Ward has covered David Bowie, Daniel Johnston and Billie Holiday,
but his fresh take on Buddy Holly’s classic “Rave On” is easily his best
“20 dollar” - M.i.a.
M.I.A. puts her electropunk warrior princess spin on The Pixies’ cult
classic “Where Is My Mind.”
“nobody does it Better” - Radiohead
Thom Yorke’s whiny vocals seem made for this yearning Carly Simon
hit. Plus, the song choice reassures us that Radiohead is not too elitist
to enjoy 70s soft rock.
“superstar” - Sonic youth
Featured in the lovable indie flick Juno, Sonic Youth’s rendition of The
Carpenters’ “Superstar” is a haunting twist on a saccharine power ballad.
“Take me to the river” - talking heads
Talking Heads’ version of “Take Me to the River” is arguably more
famous than the original, done by soul man Al Green. Just try singing
this song without picturing David Byrne in his boxy spongebob
we are hunTed
We are hunted aggregates social networks, p2p networks, music forums and blogs
to compile a chart of the most popular songs in the blogosphere based on sentiment,
expression and advocacy rather than a mere download count. it’s a smart and highly
addictive way to discover new music. here, this week’s top nine emerging songs.
(as of april 29, 2009)
Thank you god for
fixing The TaPe...
givin’ uP (don
Joe and will ask?
The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300
leT love rule 2009
xu xu fang
wAnT TO Tell OuR ReADeRs ABOuT YOuR Business? OuR ADs ARe
CHeAP AnD HYPeR-lOCAl. TO see AD RATes AnD HOw ADVeRTisinG
wiTH THe PRinTeD BlOG will HelP YOuR Business, wRiTe
By vmichael | 4/13/09 | Time Tells tpburl.com/twvpdc
I am reading Michael Meyer’s The Last Days of Old Beijing which is an excellent journal
about the death and life of a traditional Beijing hutong, which is a narrow lane of courtyard
houses. I was reading about how the planners and developers considered these areas slums even
though they functioned extremely well and served more as incubators of improvement and socialization
than harbingers of decay. Yet crime statistics that “proved” the area was overcrowded
were enough to mark it for demolition.
As Meyer described it, I thought immediately of Jane Jacob’s Death and Life of Great American
Cities and the story of Boston’s North End, which was statistically a slum but visibly NOT. I
only had to turn the page and Meyer told of Herbert Gans’ 1959 article on Boston’s North End
and Jacobs’ coverage of the same subject and her wonderful term for what was happening in
these traditional “stable, low-rent areas:” Unslumming.
Wow. There it is. For the last quarter century we have had only the term “gentrification”
but the problem with that term is that it describes something that can happen with old buildings
- like much of the near north side of Chicago or Wicker Park - OR with new buildings, like
those unprotected areas near Old Town and Wicker Park where the values rise so fast and high
that the developers are putting up $2 million Lollapallazzos on spec. Like this one on Burling.
Which is probably $5 million.
But “unslumming” DOESN’T happen with new buildings. It only happens with old buildings.
I had forgotten Jacobs’ term, but it exactly describes what happened in North Kenwood
and Oakland in the early 1990s, which I chronicled in Future Anterior four years ago ( http://
In Meyers’ Dazhalan hutong in Beijing, as in the 1950s North End and 1990s North Kenwood,
people with middle-class aspirations were unslumming their neighborhoods by rebuilding
them bit by bit and little by little and with the existing buildings. But - as Meyers quotes
Jacobs - such neighborhoods are doomed because no one is making a fortune on them. No
fortunes, no big plans, no developers, just tons and tons of incremental improvements in safety,
in socialization, in economic strength, in morality and education. A brilliant story of reclaimed
humanity and human progress, but one with no place in our limited, clumsy economy.
It’s funny. In politics this Spring, the LOSERS are whining about socialism but when it
comes to real estate development, it works the same under socialism and capitalism. I noticed
it when I first went to China in 2003: In communist China huge skyscrapers were built not
because they were needed but because there were pension funds that needed to invest in real
estate, whereas in capitalist USA huge skyscrapers were built not because they were needed but
because there were pension funds that needed to invest in real estate.
Neither country makes room for the aspiring middle class that wants to do what Jacobs
counseled: Save the people and fix the buildings. But in socialist China, that approach doesn’t
show enough progress fast enough for government officials and it doesn’t show enough profit
for wealthy developers. In capitalist USA, that approach doesn’t show enough progress fast
enough for government officials and it doesn’t show enough profit for wealthy developers. So
you see the difference, right? Right?
Preservation as we know it today derives from a postwar effort to rebuild with what was
already there. It was opposed to centralized planning in the form of urban renewal and it was
opposed to catastrophic development in the form of big projects. Preservation actually points
the way toward a third economics, a democratic economics that frees us from the clumsy hands
of the cadres and the equally clumsy hands of the hedge fund managers, from the destructive
tendencies of two outdated approaches to city building.
anna donlan | tpburl.com/pcr8s3
Kari otero | tpburl.com/qrz1sh
THe MeGHAn MCCAin GOP
By Tabitha hale | 4/21/09 | Pink elephant Pundit tpburl.com/c8zqs6
So if we learned one thing from Meghan McCain it’s that the GOP is like, so not relevant.
Her dad showed us that moderates are wholly ineffective because they never really know who
they are appealing to. What ends up happening is that they appeal to no one. When your
platform is murky, your ideals are blurry, AND you are uncool, you just don’t stand a chance.
People will choose the real thing over Democrat Lite.
Meghan McCain is the DEFINITION of a moderate. What she DOES do well is embody the
typical uninvolved voter. The masses thrive on superficiality, no matter how much those that
are paying attention bemoan the ignorance. Melissa Clouthier says it well:
Republicans need to do better. they need to be more principled and more defined and also appeal to
people who find smooth talking, fine suits, fabulous mascara and superficial trappings important. to
ignore either part of this puzzle will cause us to lose again.
That hurts, doesn’t it? However, the problem we’re running into is that we tried to appeal
to the superficial crowd without making sure they were prepared for the national spotlight.
Republicans have a propensity to devour their own - if they’re good at nothing else, they’re
good at self-destruction. Which is what they’ve effectively done.
I’m a conservative first. I ended up with the GOP simply because, like most conservatives,
I tend to vote with a lesser of two evils mentality. I think a lot of us are fed up with voting
AGAINST people. It’s high time we had someone to vote FOR. A GOP that represents McCain
style “big tent” Republicans does nothing but turn us into Democrats… and further alienate the
What the GOP seems to forget is that liberty is NOT a partisan issue. It is NOT something
that belongs to Conservatives - it transcends race, gender, sexuality, and politics. What we’re
seeing is the buy-in to the Democratic lie that liberty is a government issue, when it is truly a
human issue that the government in its current form infringes upon.
Rick Moran at Right Wing Nut House posted what should have been a depressing article.
Oddly enough, I was slightly energized by the end of it. The depressing part was that even under
the most conservative American President in history, government did not shrink. Reagan said
that once government is there, it never goes away. And it’s entirely too true. This is not a new
problem - this has been a long time coming. Pure logic - when something keeps growing, and
never shrinks, it is eventually going to get too big. And the GOP can stand around preaching
small government all day long, but the hard truth is that they have not EVER been able to make
it happen. The fact that their credibility has been completely blown away is not going to help
win elections. Moran refers to the GOP hope that Obama will in effect win the next election for
them the “illusion of opportunity”… and I have to admit that I don’t think he’s all wrong.
The reason I’m inspired? It kind of chased away my sense of fear. Why should our
principles be tied to a party? There is little logic to our fear of a GOP failure. As conservatives,
we should understand that no insitution is ever “too big” to fail. We’re willing to let bankers,
the auto industry, and everyone else fail in the name of capitalism… why are we any different?
Do we TRULY believe that in the absence of the GOP another would not rise up? The majority
of our country is center right. The hole left in the absence of the GOP WILL be filled - our
country is not going to just hand itself over to a one party system.
I had someone on Twitter tell me that if the GOP dies “America will be consumed by
neoleft darkness. The world will be a jungle. Civilization will be finished!” Can we say dramatic
much? It’s exactly this kind of fear that keeps us voting for McCains in the hope of hanging on
by a thread instead of starting over. It happened with the Whigs, and it can happen again.
I’m not saying that we should throw the GOP out the window. I’m not saying we should all
put on tin foil hats and start running around trying to run for Congress. All I’m saying is that
the death of the GOP does NOT mean the death of America - that if the recent conservative/
libertarian movements are any indicator, there will be a quick rise of another party. Maybe it
would be nice to have the GOP out of the way to give someone else a chance.
Just hypothesizing here folks. Liberty is non-partisan. I think that we should strive to be as
well… why would you hang on to a sinking ship when you can jump off and build a new one?
Tabitha hale is a new face on the political scene. a
25-year-old college grad, she is a recent addition to the
conservative political blogosphere. since returning to
her home state of north Carolina, she has made her
voice heard as the Pink elephant Pundit and gained
exposure for her unapologetic approach to political
commentary as well as for her self-proclaimed
obsession with social media. she holds a special
affection for Twitter, where roughly 20,000 followers
check her updates daily.
Chris Kitahara | tpburl.com/7z0tw6
although serious about her beliefs, Tabitha makes light of her addiction to all things political.
“i refer to myself as a future recovering political junkie,” she says. some of her current projects
include writing for Pink elephant Pundit and american issues Project and working as a board
member of smart girl Politics, an active grassroots organization supporting conservative
women. her most recent undertaking is an internet radio show launching this week on rfC
radio, aptly titled “raisin’ hale.” despite the rapid growth of smart girl Politics and the buzz
surrounding hale, grassroots politics doesn’t pay the bills just yet. she still juggles a 40 hour-aweek
job and active church life in addition to what she refers to as her “political alter ego.”
“There’s life outside of politics. That’s how i plan to keep it,” she says. This is just the beginning
for hale, who doesn’t plan on going anywhere. “i’m trying to be a voice and say things that need
to be said – it’s a passion. i’ll be around for a while.”
VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 9
BiG in jAPAn: enViROnMenTAllY
fRienDlY Bikinis MADe Of PlAsTiC
By serkan Toto | 4/17/09 | Crunchgear tpburl.com/4wn1c7
Tokyo-based chemical company Asahi Kasei, a corporate giant with 25,000 employees,
has announced an environmentally friendly product of the very special kind: swimsuits [JP].
The lovely ladies you can see on the picture (Ayumi Kura, 20, on the left and eighteen-year-old
Shi Weng Lu on the right) are wearing bikinis made of polyethylene tephthalate. Polyethylene
tephthalate (PET) is the stuff they use to make plastic bottles.
Asahi Kasei claims the swimsuits they make from PET (marketed under the brand name
Sunplay ECO) are very quick to dry and offer a high level of elasticity. I bet they do. The
company also says that compared to conventional swimwear, Sunplay products have a better
environmental footprint by using less oil and releasing less carbon dioxide in the production
Unfortunately, Asahi Kasei hasn’t said yet when the new swimwear will be sold and if it will
find its way outside Japan, too.
Too faT To fly (BuT noT Too Tall?)
By harriet | 4/18/09 | feed me! tpburl.com/ntxh4q
My daughter took a flight recently and sat next to a man who she guessed was over seven
feet tall. No lie. And because there was no elbow rest between their seats, she spent the flight
hunched into a corner of her seat.
You can be damn sure this gentleman was not charged for two seats. And yet anyone who
now flies United who takes up more than his or her allotted seat centimeters due to weight will
be charged for two seats. So flying fat will cost you double, but flying tall won’t.
I find United’s new policy offensive and discriminatory on many levels. If you do too,
consider following the directions in the form letter below, which was created by Marilyn Wann,
to protest. Because you better believe that if United gets away with this, all the major carriers
will start imposing a fat flyers’ penalty. And who’s to say what’s “too fat” to fly with a single
ticket? Down the line, could ticket agents be whipping out BMI charts when you get your
boarding pass? I put nothing past this fatphobic society (and the airlines’ desperation to turn a
united airlines is the last of the major carriers to announce proudly a policy of charging fat passengers
they say they received 700 complaints last year (out of 80 million passengers carried) from thin
people who did not like having a fat person sit next to them and perhaps take up some of their
i am convinced that the 700 fat seatmates who didn’t complain were not too happy about the situation,
either. people in the fat pride community have decided to try and beat that 700 complaints
i’m writing to ask you and the people you know to complain at united.com about this costly and
discriminatory targeting of one demographic group. if this policy stands, it means fat people have
less right to interstate air travel than other people. everybody deserves a safe and comfortable
chair on an airplane, at an affordable price!
here’s the link for Customer Relations.
expect to be asked to fill in some irksome required fields:
- if you don’t have a united frequent flier number, you can use mine: 00229870823.
- For flight info, i just put 4/15/2009 (the day united announced its policy).
- For departure and return cities, i put San Francisco in both slots.
please copy your complaint letter to my e-mail address, so we can keep count as we approach
and pass 700.
thanks tons! - [insert your name and e-mail address]
Janka Mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj
life wiTHOuT eVenTs is like A COOkie wiTHOuT CHOCOlATe
CHiPs. sO sHARe YOuR eVenTs wiTH THe wORlD, Be THeY leCTuRes,
COnCeRTs, PlAYs, sPORTinG eVenTs, ZePHYR lAunCHes, OR MARTY
MCflY fAn CluB MeeTinGs BY senDinG An eMAil TO eVenTs@
google kind of love or why TBid and i are going To The
By amanda | 4/27/09 | noisiest Passenger tpburl.com/xrpf3w
I’m really good at beginning relationships - open, adventurous, and unavailable enough to
The problem begins when I start to like the guy. Because people who really like and grow
to love each other tend to want to spend time together. Sometimes they want to hear each
other’s voices before they drift off to sleep or share the most banal details of their days and feel
captivating and supported. Occasionally, they just want to be around with no purpose but to
say, “I could do nothing with you all day, and it would be something.”
Over a year into dating TBID, I’m starting to get itchy. Some article I once read talked about
how new love is intoxicating, but lovers develop a tolerance over time. That explains those
moments when the person who made your heart skip a beat starts raising your blood pressure.
You realize your significant other has the potential to be significantly annoying.
“If he says ‘initiative’ in five syllables one more time,” you tell yourself, “I am so outta
Still, TBID rarely annoys me. (We’ll give that a few more months). What does bother me
is that I worry that we don’t spend enough time together. Then again, that may be why this
relationship is working. Is that a problem?
Do two committed people who live five express stops from each other normally talk
everyday? TBID and I don’t always. Because we both have our own creative and professional
pursuits outside of our jobs, we often spend one weekend day apart and one together. During
the work-week, we’ll generally see each other once.
This wasn’t the case in my previous relationship. Giddy goo-ga in the beginning, the
ex-boyfriend and I spent a ridiculous amount of time together. The fall I began tutoring and
freelancing, he started to complain that I always seemed distracted and that we didn’t spend
as much time together. But my new pursuits thrilled me. The relationship, for various reasons,
slowly gathered dust and eventually became something I used to be in.
Alone time is a godsend and a necessity, even more so for me than TBID. Yet I wish I could
demarcate what time is his, mine, and ours with ours somehow growing at the same time as our
creative output. It’s not balancing the national budget or anything, but it’s hard.
The latest initiative (that’s “initiative” in four syllables) in our relationship is a shared
Google calendar and list of stuff to do. This way, neither TBID nor I can ever shrug and resolve
that, “Nope. There’s absolutely nothing to do in NYC today.” The list includes boxes for who
thought of the idea, where it is, when it is, price, and why on Earth you’d want to do this
activity as a couple.
No one has used, “Because we’re dating, so you just have to” in that last box yet, though
I’m certainly considering it for this Make Your Own Yarn Animals workshop I heard about.
Events go on the calendar after we’ve officially IMed, emailed, or mentioned them to each
other and received a yes.
This new system has been successful so far. The best part of this is that TBID came up with
the system - not me, the control freak. No wonder he’s always toward the top of my to-do list.
TwiTTeR is THe new fACeBOOk. fOllOw OuR TweeTs AT
we weRe jusT kiDDinG, fACeBOOk. nO AMOunT Of TweeTs
CAn eVeR RePlACe YOu. BeCOMe A fAn Of THe PRinTeD BlOG BY
seARCHinG fOR us On THe BesT sOCiAl neTwORkinG siTe On THe
The PrinTed Blog is PrinTed By John s. swifT Co., inC. www.JohnswifTPrinT.Com (847) 465-3300
Kaisern Chen | tpburl.com/dkpsqg
kim shows off her sunBurn!
By liz | 4/17/09 | TheseBootsaremadeforstalking.com tpburl.com/mdfby8
Kim Kardashian needs some aloe vera asap!
The reality-TV star posted photos on her blog of her extreme sunburn from falling asleep in
the sun in Mexico.
“PLEASE HELP ME! I am so sunburned!” Kardashian wrote on her Twitter page. “I fell asleep
with huge glasses on yesterday! This tan line is not ok!!!”
She added, “I’m going to have to hide from cameras for days. I usually never get red, I
always get dark. It hurts!”
She then asks for some post-burning advice, “Do u guys have any remedies I can try to
help ease the pain and get rid of the redness? … I will never wear sunglasses when sunbathing
Go with the spray tan next time Kim!
wind-uP viBraTor gives greener orgasms
Zoltan Fodor | tpburl.com/rfzk0x
By simon Crisp | 4/27/09 | newlite tpburl.com/k35604
A vibrator powered by a hand
crank (no pun intended) has gone on
sale as the world’s first wind-up sex toy.
Makers say the ‘Earth Angel
Vibrator’ is made from recycled
materials and can give an hour of
eco-gasmic power for 8 minutes of
Users wind a built-in handle to
charge the £65 device and can select
from 4 speeds of vibration or store the energy for another time.
One user said: “It feels good to be doing my bit for the environment and now my husband
doesn’t keep asking what we need all the batteries for when we are at the supermarket.”
Bonny Hall of sex toy website LoveHoney added: “It may sound like a wind-up, but going green
has never been this sexy.”
“i Tell my husBand i’m going To The gym & insTead go To a
Pole danCing Class.”
By Brandy | 4/27/09 | it’s like i’m... mmmagic! tpburl.com/jhtsdg
It’s Monday, so you know the drill. Read past Monday (or Sunday!) posts in January,
February and March to get caught up. Also remember to keep the secrets coming and let other
people know about the project. I thought it was interesting that this week there were TWO
submissions (sent within hours of each other) both relating to the Vegas meet up!
1. I am secretly married. My family has no idea. They do not like my husband. We have a child
together. I have no idea how to break the news to them. I cannot live this lie anymore….
2. I’ve been having some gynaecological issues the past couple of years. I wouldn’t mind if it
turned out I was infertile, because then I would have a valid reason for not ever giving birth to
something without being judged for it. The whole pregnancy thing terrifies me.
3. I’m at a point in life where I feel like I have no friends. So many have moved away or simply
moved on. I’m lonely for girlfriends, and I wish I remembered how to make them.
4. I’d like to go to the Bloggers in Sin City meetup, but don’t think I’m cool enough.
5. In all my friendships, I am always the better friend. The one who tries harder, gives more,
listens longer. Telling someone they need to be a better friend makes me sound like I’m in
primary school but I’m exhausted.
6. I read the secret last week about someone admitting they had a blog crush. I have one too.
I’m 100% male with a crush on a female blogger and am not sure I should tell her. I wonder if
the girl from last week was talking about me?
7. I totally want to go to the blogging meet up in Vegas but I feel like everyone already is friends
and I’m the odd man (well, okay woman) out.
8. I never masturbate. Ever. I always hear about girls being shy about how much they get off, but
unless I’m having actual sex with someone else- it just doesn’t happen. I feel like such a freak
for admitting this but I have no idea how to make myself “happy”.
9. I’ve been blogging for six years and my blogroll is out of control. I want to delete it but feel like
I will hurt a lot of people’s feelings if I do. And I know someone will tell me that people really
won’t care if they are deleted if you explain why- and I have to say (here’s my second secret!!),
I’m always sort of bummed out when I’m deleted from someone else’s blogroll so I’m trying
to avoid making people feel how I felt.
10. I sometimes buy clothes, wear them (with the tags hidden!) and return them for cash.
For each issue we post a question on our twitter feed and these are your answers.
post your opinion to our questions and you might be featured in our next issue at
@THePRinTeDBlOG AskeD: if YOu COulD nAMe susAn BOYle’s fiRsT
AlBuM, wHAT wOulD YOu CAll iT?
@breeanelyse Songs From Behind the Paper Bag
@tjwrighter “Swan Song”
@edwarddomain Susan's 1st album: "I told you fu**ers I was good!”
@danielcollins “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful”
@rushbomb “Like a Fine Wine”
@Jayferris Boyle Poppin’: Susan re-imagines 13 Britney Spears classics.
@Braxtonmedia Susan Boyle: Hag to Riches
@msdarkstar The Melody of True Beauty
@hollywoodjane Scotch & Soda.
@clevelandsaplum “this record better get me bloody laid”
andreas de lara | tpburl.com/8r4063
Kaisern Chen | tpburl.com/dkpsqg
VieWS expReSSed in Content do not neCeSSaRily ReFleCt the VieWS oF the puBliSheR oR the pRinted Blog inC. 11
tinseltown tease: “tone it uP”
by Jessica | 4/24/09 | shady sadie tpburl.com/742xsp
Here’s a little story I’ve been wanting to share with you for some time. Not-so-little known
fact: this Jew is an on-again off-again exotic dancer, and when times get tough, the tough get
the girls out. And the times, friends, have indeed been tough.
We’re through the rough patch, but earlier this spring, I found myself assed-out and with
nowhere to turn but down.
DownTOWN, that is! And so, at 2 p.m. on a Wednesday, dressed in heels and a cleavagebearing
half-shirt (always keep it classy), I pulled into the parking lot of the Spearmint Rhino,
located in the lower asshole of downtown L.A.
If you’re unfamiliar with the world of exotic dance, you might be under the mistaken
impression that a place with the word “Rhino” in it isn’t the most upscale joint around. But
au contraire. It’s actually staffed by chicks with the bounciest breasts and fakest smiles in the
industry. I didn’t go in there with any misconceptions about my chances of getting hired, but at
the same time, I figured, why not aim high?
I went in coifed and made up. The bouncer directed me up a set of stairs to the dressing
room. I changed into my bikini, scoping the competition in the process (a MILF and an 18-yearold),
made haste back downstairs, and greeted the DJ. First song topless, second song naked.
I had never actually danced fully naked, by the way. I’ve been a titties and bikini kind of
gal thus far, thanks in no small part to the crippling laws surrounding Los Angeles strip clubs.
So half of it was new to a Jew. Song one, tits out. Song two; my bottoms came off and all I
felt was a cool breeze on my outer (and, briefly, inner) labia. Nothing different but the wind.
Anyway, I thought I did a nice little number. I worked in a few pole tricks (never putting
my lady parts on the pole though, I don’t know, that grosses me out). I moved slow, the guy
sitting at the stage wearing serial killer bifocals tipped me. Wonderful. I walked off the stage
butt-ass, stepped into my bottoms on the stairs and checked in with the very chubby DJ.
“Go get dressed and then wait for the manager.”
Pause for effect. If you think that the words “go get dressed” are a bad sign for a stripper,
you are correct.
For a second I tried talking him out of making me get dressed, but DJ’s don’t like to do the
manager’s dirty work, so finally I gave it up and did the Walk of Shame up to the dressing room.
I tried to avoid eye contact with the skinny MILF, who now represented all of my own personal
Dressed, packed, and walked back down.
Finally, the manager showed. The man was a sphere. A perfect sphere. A sphere with a
moustache, to be exact. He was short and round, like that chick from Willy Wonka who turns
into a fucking blueberry. Had I knocked him over and kicked him in the side, his fat ass would
have rolled out the door. And here’s what this motherfucker tells me:
“Right now, I’m pretty full, so I probably won’t be hiring for another few months (that’s a
classic strip club manager lie, btw). So, I had the chance to watch your first song from my office.
You move well, but you need to…you know…tone it up.”
Oh my fucking god.
“Tone it…tone what up? My body??”
“Yeah. So you know, if you want to work on that and then come back in a few months,
maybe we can see then.”
First of all, are you fucking kidding me?? Come back in a few months? If I’m going to be
building up job skills over the course of several months, it is not going to be so that I can try to
get hired at another strip club. I’ll kill you.
Second of all, I really wish that I had said, “How dare you,” because I’ve always wanted to
say that to someone and mean it. But I didn’t have my wits about me, and so instead I shook his
hand, thanked him, and left.
Walk of Shame, the sequel, out to the parking lot. At this point, my confidence was more
than bruised. What am I going to do - go to the reject’s club? The home for ugly strippers?
Couldn’t he have just told me they were full and sent me on my way?
The good news is that I didn’t let the Sphere’s comment throw me into a complete and
total downward spiral of self-hatred, which I would have at other points in my life. I think that
speaks to my maturity, my sense of self. And frankly, while this may seem like the time for a
feminist analysis of the sex industry, in fact it is not. It’s just too fucking obvious. Yeah, unfair
standards of beauty, narrow concept of what men want, etc. etc. The thing is that it all really
leads me back to one, simple sentiment: FUCK that guy.
As Julia Roberts once said, BIG mistake. HUGE! Let’s be real - I am an amazing dancer (Jew),
and I know how to hustle. As such, I was immediately snatched up (haha, no pun intended) by
a wiser strip club manager, one with far better taste.
And, p.s., I toned up absolutely nothing. Take THAT.
gaspar marquez | tpburl.com/5svywz
Kari otero | tpburl.com/qrz1sh
Red Ribbon Bake Shop
Location: 138 S. Vermont Ave, Los Angeles, CA 90004
See all Los Angeles reviews at www.yelp.com/la
thE PrintEd bLOg is PrintEd by JOhn s. sWiFt CO., inC. WWW.JOhnsWiFtPrint.COM (847) 465-3300
May W. says, “I've driven by this place so many times, but never knew it existed until yesterday.
Apparently, this location is really small compared to the other Reb Ribbons. I haven't been to
any other location so I can't compare, but this was definitely a really, really tiny shop. The
parking situation was really, really bad, but at least it was free.
Anyway, I had to pick up a giant 3/4 mango cake for an alumni event I attended last night and let
me tell you, everyone RAVED about the cake. I'm not usually a big fan of cake, but I had to
agree with all the compliments I heard. The cake was moist, fluffy, and had a nice subtle hint of
mango to it. It was not overpowering, but I wish they would have added slices of real mango to
it instead of just flavoring the cake with...uhh, I don't know (but it tasted like mango!!).
I don't know how much the cake cost so I can't speak about the price. However, I can tell you
about the service. Everyone in the bake shop was very friendly and greeted me the moment I
walked in. The manager even helped me bring the large cake to my car. I'm really glad he did
because that thing was huge and I have a poor vestibular system (I lose my balance for no
reason sometimes. Seriously.).”
Jason shannon and bob
keane, mat kearney
van morrison/astral weeks
LOs angELEs EvEnts
shiny toy guns
alela diane/mariee sioux
whisky a go-go
see what is happening in Los angeles at eventful.com/Losangeles
Janka mudrakova | tpburl.com/tf07rj