August 2011 - OutreachNC Magazine

August 2011 - OutreachNC Magazine

Aging Outreach Services


Vol. 2 ISSUe 8

utreach NC

OutreachNC • April 2010 1

Navigating all your aging needs


‘Bless her heart’

Southern humor of

bestselling N.C. author

Celia Rivenbark

2 OutreachNC • April 2010

OutreachNCAugust 2011 3

4 OutreachNCAugust 2011

August, for many, marks those last, long days of

summer that may be savored with a trip to the

coast, mountains, somewhere in-between or simply

rocking in the porch swing as the sun begins to set.

This month, we make the quick trip to Wilmington to

set a spell with North Carolina bestselling author Celia

Rivenbark, whose latest book, “You Don’t Sweat Much

for a Fat Girl,” epitomizes Southern humor at its best.

Southerners may be known for their drawl, but

assuredly for their cuisine. The Moore County Chamber

of Commerce sets the table with its annual fund-raiser

in the Culinary Showcase where businesses compete

for top honors. With good food in mind, the Apex Rotary

works with Carrabba’s Italian Grill to add more flavor to

local Meals on Wheels deliveries. And all of this savory

food might leave you thirsty

Aging Outreach Services

utreach NC

Navigating all your aging needs

PO Box 2478

676 NW Broad Street

Southern Pines, NC 28388

(910) 692-9609 Office

(910) 695-0766 Fax

PO Box 2019

101-A Brady Court

Cary, NC 27512

(919) 535-8713 Office

(919) 535-8719 Fax

OutreachNC is a publication

of Aging Outreach Services, Inc.


Carrie Frye

Advertising Sales

Shawn Buring

(910) 690-1276

(919) 909-2645

Editorial Assistant

Jessica Bricker

Marketing & Public Relations

Susan McKenzie

The entire contents of OutreachNC are

copyrighted by Aging Outreach Services.

Reproduction or use, without permission,

of editorial, photographic or graphic

content in any manner is prohibited.

OutreachNC is published monthly

on the first of each month.

Cover Photography by Mollie Tobias

From the Editor

Inside this Issue...

Ask the Expert.......................5

Back Care............................37

Caregiver Awards.................7

Caregiver Spotlight............50

Consumer Beware...............46

Continuum of Care..............13

Cooking Simple..................12

Creative Retirement............21

Gadgets & Good Finds..........6

Grey Matter Games.............26

Guiding Lights....................49

Hospital Health...................32

Independent Living............11

Literary Circle......................17

Long-Term Care..................27

Medicare Update.................16

Mental Health Minute..........38

Money Matters.......NEW!......8

Over My Shoulder..............20

Planning Ahead...................25

Senior Moments..................24

Senior Shorts Guest

Writer Celia Rivenbark

from her new book,

“You Don’t Sweat

Much for a Fat Girl”


Sentimental Journey........48

Spirituality & Aging.............50


Volunteer Opportunities.....33

for some North Carolina wine like the muscadine and

other fruit variety of Adams Vineyards in Willow Spring,

where the family legacy grows deep on this century farm.

With all good things in moderation, stay alert and be

aware of the latest scams to avoid their negative impact

in recognition of National Fraud Awareness.

We also accentuate the positive with the pets in our

lives and the veterinarians like Diane Schaller, DVM,

who find honor in caring for our furry best friends.

Welcoming friends and guests is what three couples

do best at their respective bed and breakfast inns:

Knollwood House, A Bed of Roses and Rosemary

House, all of which could provide a perfect late summer

getaway. Each was kind enough to share a scrumptious

breakfast recipe, too. Until next month...

—Carrie Frye

Celia Rivenbark

page 34


with pets

page 30



page 18

Culinary Showcase

page 10

Meals on


page 22

page 14

Life as Innkeepers

page 39


: It seems like

every time I turn

around, something bad

happens. I am 82 years

old, and I can’t seem to

get away from bad news,

terrible things happening

around me or just my

family not being helpful.

I find myself being really

negative about everything

and I shouldn’t feel this

way. Can you offer some



: Everyone must learn to manage both the

stresses caused by major life events and the

routine stresses of day-to-day life. Too much stress

may adversely affect physical health, your ability to

deal with problems, as well as your mental health

and overall happiness. Perhaps it is time to try a few

coping strategies that might help change your view.

I am sure like most people you have dealt with

loss and grief, money issues, challenging health

issues, social role changes and family frustrations.

You are the rule and not the exception. So, first of

all—you are not alone! As we gracefully age, we

are faced with a diverse array of new opportunities

to overcome. That being said, here are a few things

to consider:

• Learn to be positive about social interactions

and relationships by getting involved, volunteering,

helping others or contributng to a cause. Sing in a

group, play music and relax with beautiful melodies

enjoyed by friends and family. All of these things

may help improve your self-esteem.

• Learn to be positive with your spiritual beliefs,

and exercise that expression with others who support

those beliefs such as church groups and civic groups.

• Learn to be positive with your physical capabilities

and focus on a healthy lifestyle. Perhaps walking

with friends, a water aerobics class or a seated yoga

session will help to change your perspective.

• Learn to cope with frustrating people and

circumstances with a positive spin by asking yourself

how you can turn lemons into lemonade. Helping

others will always help you.

• Learn to focus on the things you do well, and

Ask the Expert

Our experts will answer

any aging questions

you might have.

E-mail your questions to

or fax to (910) 695-0766.

Wayne Davies, MA, MS

Geriatric Care Manager

AOS Care Management

OutreachNCAugust 2011 5

do them often. Perhaps

it is better to cut down

on activities that are not

your “cup of tea.”

• Learn to surround

yourself with positive

thinkers and people with

can-do attitudes. Positive

perspectives of positive

people are contagious.

Finally, the best way

to cope with all kinds of

stress is through a strong

belief in yourself and your ability to positively

deal with situations. Believing in yourself has

many positive effects on your physical and mental

health. Moreover, others receive that benefit

through your sympathy, empathy, encouragement

and positive example.

Support yourself by also seeking out

professional help and counsel. Reach out to

trusted relationships for assistance, too. You still

matter, and you still count. Your own experience

and wise counsel comes with age. I am positive

you are still relevant.

3 Moore County Locations: Pinehurst, Carthage & Southern Pines

Call 910.295.2124 today!

6 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Hot enough for you? I do not like the heat, the

sun, the heat, the humidity, the heat; you get the

idea. However, I am fortunate that I do not have an

underlying condition or illness that makes tolerating the

heat even harder. Many are not so lucky, and this time

of year can be extremely debilitating.

Diseases that cause heat intolerance such as Multiple

Sclerosis (MS), make functioning in hot weather

difficult. I am not sure exactly how it happens, but I

have read in the literature that even a small increase

in body temperature of one-half of a degree can be

enough to cause problems. Imagine what these hot

days of summer can do.

Suggestions on ways to beat the heat are many.

Misting the patio, deck or pool area can lower the

outside temperature up to 20 degrees, and swimming

has been considered one of the best exercises for

those suffering from MS, because the pool water keeps

body temperature low. However, these solutions can

be expensive. Some commercial body coolers, such as

neck and wrist coolers are relatively inexpensive, but

may not be completely effective for users with MS.

The most common way to keep the body’s

temperature regulated is to use a body vest.

There are many styles of body vests

available, but they are basically broken

into two groups: active and passive


The active cooling vests have

systems that push cool liquid

through the vest via a motorized

cooling unit. There is a definite

advantage, because the cooling

is very effective. The major

disadvantage is the bulk and

weight. An active cooling vest

Cooling vests can help beat summer heat

usually requires not only

the vest, but also a separate

cooling unit. Portability may

not be practical. However,

studies suggest that even

after removing the vest, a

person’s temperature may

remain lower for about

an hour.

Passive vests (pictured),

on the other hand, use

Gadgets & Good Finds

Connie Hess

ice or gel packs placed in pockets. They can be worn

under clothing or on top of it. Because the styles differ

greatly, it is vital to do your homework before investing

in one of these vests. I have seen them used very

effectively. The prices vary widely, and it is important

to know that there are resources for those who may not

be able to afford the vest otherwise. For example, the

Multiple Sclerosis Association of America has a program

that will supply these vests to qualifying MS sufferers

who qualify. (The application can be found on their web

site,; if you

don’t have access to a computer, call me at

(910) 246-5155, and I will mail an application

to you.)

I urge every person with MS, or

anyone debilitated by the heat,

to consider the purchase of this

assistive device. With the proper

vest, even a person with MS can

more easily face these hot days

of summer.

Hess, a certified Assistive

Technology Professional at Health

Innovations Pharmacy, can be

reached at (910) 246-5155.

Rejuvenating Fitness Services

Allister Coleman

Personal Trainer/Fitness Instructor

In-Home Personal Training Services

If you canʼt or donʼt want to go to the gym, but still want to be fit...

We will bring the gym to you!

Using Nationally Certified Personal Trainers to assist you in all fitness areas

Serving the Sandhills with

Senior Exercise & Restorative Programs

910.528.1408 |

Moore caregiver nominations due Sept. 9

The 2nd Annual Moore

County Caregiver

Awards offer the opportunity

to honor caregivers and

volunteers who work with

seniors. Day after day

in the life of older adults,

there are people who work

and sacrifice to make sure

that each senior has the

opportunity to have a better

quality of life.

Nomination forms are

available at right or online


Completed forms should be

submitted by Sept. 9, 2011.

Caregivers need only work,

volunteer or live in Moore

County to be nominated.

Each nominee will be

honored at a reception in

October, and the top three

finalists will be featured in

the November edition of


Gold level sponsors

are Sandhills Community

College, Penick Village and


Angel sponsors include

FirstHealth Home Care

Services, Fox Hollow Senior

Living Community, Moore

Registry, Elmcroft of Southern

Pines, and Garner Law Firm.

Helping Hands sponsors are

Health Innovations Pharmacy,

Liberty Home Care & Hospice,

Four Oaks Bank, Community

Home Care & Hospice, Mollie

Tobias Photography, Davis

Video Productions, Prime

Time Limousines, Uniquely

Chic, Better Health Massage,

AOS Hospitality House,

Carolina Eye Associates and

Crescent State Bank.

For more information on

the 2011 Caregiver Awards,

contact Rhonda Priest at

(910) 692-2434.

Sponsored by:

2nd Annual Moore County


Honor the people who make your life easier, better and longer. Day after day in the life of older

adults, there are people who work and sacrifice to make sure that each senior has an opportunity to

have a better quality of life. Now is the time to make sure those people finally get the recognition that

they deserve. Nominations are open to the Moore County community. Simply download the

nomination form at and fax, e-mail or mail the completed form to:

Caregiver Awards c/o Moore Registry, P.O. Box 2478, Southern Pines, NC 28388

Fax: 910-692-4436 or e-mail to

NOMINATION DEADLINE IS: Friday, September 9, 2011

The Winner & Finalists will be featured in the November Issue of OutreachNC

A selection committee of community peers will review all nominees and announce the three finalists at the

caregiver appreciation reception/ceremony, October 28, 2011. The finalists will win a makeover and photo

shoot to be featured in the November issue of OutreachNC. All nominees will be honored at the reception.


1. To be eligible for the award, the nominated person must be working or volunteering on a regular basis

with senior adults in Moore County.

2. All nominators must complete the nomination form and attach an essay describing why this nominee

deserves the award.

NOTE: Portions of the essay may be published in the November issue of OutreachNC

3. All nominations must be received by September 9, 2011.

4. Once the nomination has been received, you will be mailed/emailed a confirmation of receipt. It is your

responsibility to notify the person you nominated about the nomination. If you have not received a

confirmation two weeks prior to the deadline (September 9, 2011), please notify us immediately. Please

keep copies of all nomination materials submitted, as they will not be returned.

Sponsored by:

OutreachNCAugust 2011 7


2nd Annual Moore County

Fax form to (910) 692-4436, e-mail to

or mail to Caregiver Awards, PO Box 2478, Southern Pines, NC 28388.

Nomination deadline is September 9, 2011.


Honor the people who make your life easier, better and longer. Day after day in the life of older

adults, there are people who work and sacrifice to make sure that each senior has an opportunity to

have a better quality of life. Now is the time Fine Assisted to make Living sure those people finally get the recognition that

they deserve. Nominations are open and to the Memory Moore Care County community. Simply download the

nomination form at 190 Fox Hollow Rd. and Pinehurst, fax, NCe-mail or mail the completed form to:


Caregiver Awards c/o Moore Registry, P.O. Box 2478, Southern Pines, NC 28388

Fax: 910-692-4436 or e-mail to

8 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Debt, deficit and default

think almost everyone has re-evaluated their own

I financials in the last couple years. A little financial

hardship is a good incentive to correct excessive

spending, set goals to pay down debt and ensure

adequate savings.

It may get more difficult when your numbers are in

the billions and you’re making decisions for an entire

country but it’s not necessarily much different.

It was impossible to miss the discussion on

government deficit last month; from downgrading

United States Debt to not paying Social Security

checks, the reports were severe and ubiquitous.

For once all the politicians and reporters agreed on

something: fiscal policy must be changed.

Currently, spending is higher than earnings, meaning

each year’s deficit increases the overall debt. The

quick solution is to raise the debt limit, currently

$14.29 trillion. If the debt limit does not get raised, the

government may be forced to choose between items

such as defense or social security income, either of

which would be detrimental to our economy.

So if all we have to do is raise the debt limit, what’s

all the debate about? Congress has authorized

raising the debt ceiling ten times already in the

past decade, and eventually, tax revenue won’t

be enough to pay off the interest on that debt, not

to mention other expenses like Social Security.

So raising the debt ceiling also increases our

expenses. It does not take budgeting brilliance to

see that is not a good solution.

Although raising the debt limit is not a permanent

solution and could worsen our current financial

condition, Congress will most likely include this as

part of the solution because it is the quickest way to

avoid default.

When we cannot make

payments, we go into default.

Standard and Poor’s, a bond

rating agency, has given U.S.

Debt a AAA rating (the

highest safety rating

possible) for 70 years

which has allowed us

to borrow from other

Money Matters

Taylor Clement

countries at minimal cost. During a default, interest

rates we pay tend to go up to counterbalance the

risk of investment. Even a one percent increase in

our debt would increase the interest due by $140

billion each year, causing innumerous other financial

difficulties for the country.

The only long-term options are to increase tax

revenue or substantially decrease government

spending, and we have two political parties arguing

which is the lesser of two evils. In all likelihood, the

solution is not either/or, it’s both.

Like all the families who have faced financial

difficulty in the last couple years, diligent budgeting

and some sacrifices have made it possible to

overcome the problems. There is no easy solution

nor will it be fun, but part of being financially

responsible is making the prudent decisions for a

better future.

Clement is a financial planner with Clement Capital

Group. She offers securities and advisory services as

an investment adviser representative of Commonwealth

Financial Network(R), a member firm of FINRA/SIPC a

Registered Investment Advisor. She can be reached at

(910) 693-0032 or at

OutreachNCAugust 2011 9

10 OutreachNC OutreachNCAugust 2011August 2011 Retirement

community defends Culinary Cup

Chicken, potato and pumpkin. For Penick

Village, a continuing care retirement

community in Southern Pines, it came

down to these three ordinary ingredients for their win in

the 2010 Culinary Showcase in Southern Pines.

Of course, the chicken was a Cornish hen in an applecranberry

compote, and the potatoes —a crispy wrap

zinged with horseradish— were mere dressing for the

dish’s star, perfectly seared scallops. A moist pumpkin

cake frosted generously with cream cheese icing topped

off Penick Village’s entry into the contest.

Started in 2007 and organized by the Moore County

Chamber of Commerce, the Culinary Showcase brings

area restaurants together under a single roof for one night.

Through this event, the chamber hopes to entice new

customers for its members – one taste bud at a time.

“The quality of restaurants in Moore County is

astounding,” says Linda Parsons, vice president of the

chamber. “The showcase gives the community a time to

come together and sample all their foods while enjoying

a fun night out.”

The competitive aspect of the showcase adds to the

event’s appeal. Chefs whisk their best creations to the

judges, who are food professionals and local people of

note. They rate the dishes on taste, presentation and

originality. Awards are given for best entrée, appetizer

and dessert with the Culinary Cup going to the eatery

with the highest score in all three categories.

Last year’s win for Penick Village came as a surprise to

many. Penick’s win against formidable opponents shows

how far institutional food has come.

“You just don’t think of a rest home, for lack of a better

word, as having that kind of cuisine,” says Tom Cruce,

a Pinehurst man who enjoys the showcase every year.

“The dish was excellent. I’d order it at a restaurant.”

Jeff Hutchins, chief executive officer of Penick

Village, says the showcase gave executive chef Scott

Margolis a chance to put his creations up against

“amazing restaurants.”

“They’ve got great vision,” Hutchins says of Margolis

and his team. “Scott is committed to making sure our

residents get a great dining experience. I was thrilled the

dining team got that honor.”

On top of the official judging, everyone who attends

the showcase gets a chance to weigh in on the best

food. The People’s Choice award goes to

the eatery with the most votes. In the event’s

first year, Rhett Morris of Rhett’s Restaurant

in Southern Pines, took

home that prize. Last year,

his chicken cordon bleu

By Melanie Coughlin

Special to OutreachNC

with collard greens received rave reviews from the more

than 300 guests.

“It’s fun to compete against the big boys,” Morris says

of the larger restaurants that participate in the showcase.

Indeed, the challenge of going up against renowned

chefs like those at the Carolina Dining Room and Elliott’s

seems to be part of the appeal for smaller restaurants to

compete. Bonnie Black, owner of The Market Place in

Southern Pines, is entering the Culinary Showcase for

the first time this year.

“I’m a competitive person,” says Black, who is

known for her chicken salad on a croissant. “I want to

get the word out that we’re not just a sandwich shop.

We have really good food, and we can compete with

the big restaurants.”

Due to its growth, the Culinary Showcase moves to the

Carolina Hotel this year. It will cap off Pinehurst Resort’s

23rd annual Labor Day weekend Food and Wine Festival.

“They (the Moore County Chamber of Commerce)

have established a brand for the Culinary Cup and have

a really great format to showcase some of the better

restaurants in the area,” says Kerry Andrews, director

of marketing communications for the resort. “We felt it

would be a great fit.”

The Carolina Dining Room will still showcase its dishes

but has bowed out of the competition this year because

of its home turf advantage.

Bonnie Black is ready no matter who the competition is.

“Yeah, we can hang with the big boys,” she says


This year, the “big boys” will include Penick Village, no

doubt eager to hold on to its shiny Culinary Cup.

The showcase will be held on Sunday, September 4 from

6 to 8:30 p.m. Tickets are $50 per person and available at or by calling (910) 692-

3926. A portion of the proceeds go to scholarships for

students in Sandhills

Community College’s

culinary arts program

with the remaining

proceeds supporting

member programs.

Penick Village executive chef Scott Margolis will have

to top last year’s cornish hen to hold on to the Culinary

Cup at the 2011 Culinary Showcase on Sept. 4.

Photos courtesy of David Nicoll Photography

Make time for activities that mean most


This time of the year I am always reminded of going

back to school and those extracurricular activities

that came with it. Once the responsibilities of career

and children have passed, there is more time for the fun

things of life again.

I see my Dad, who is retired, playing cards with friends,

attending church breakfasts, gardening and eating out

with friends on a regular basis.

My grandmother, at 85 years old, has a social group

that gathers once a month. They take turns meeting

at someone’s house or going out to eat. They all have

different life experiences and are at different places in

their lives too, but they remain close and supportive.

Extracurricular activities

add spice and meaning

to our lives. Most include

spending time with

other people. As people

age, isolation may occur.

Isolation can cause

depression. The symptoms

of depression affect every

aspect of life, including

energy, appetite, sleep,

interest in work, hobbies

and relationships.

Interaction with people

and getting the support

you need plays a big

role in lifting the fog of

depression and keeping it

away. You may not feel like

reaching out, but make an

effort to connect to others

and limit the time you are

alone. If you cannot get

out, invite loved ones to

visit you, or keep in touch

over the phone or e-mail.

Lots of group activities

are available for seniors to

attend. Local park systems

often have different

groups offering a variety of

activities. Churches, travel

agents and community

centers are also places to

start the search for what

group activity fits your

needs best.

Whether you are attending a

church meeting, a garden club

or joining a bus tour to see

major league baseball games

all over the United States,

enjoy your extracurricular


OutreachNCAugust 2011 11

Independent Living

Jill Murr

Murr, Community Educator

at Preferred Living Solutions,

a care management team, can be

reached at (919) 535-8713 or

12 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Cooking Simple

Rhett Morris

Nothing says summertime

quite like a ripe and juicy

tomato. I can remember

as a child having them all day

long. At breakfast, we would

have grits, eggs, bacon and sliced

tomatoes. Then for lunch, it

was a tomato sandwich, and

dinnertime brought stewed

tomatoes with squash and

onions. I did not particularly

like tomatoes as a child, but if they were growing in

the garden, we were eating them. As I got older my

taste for them developed, and now I look forward to

them each year.

Tomatoes are really a simple food. You can eat

them raw, grilled, broiled, boiled, canned, sautéed

or fried. They also happen to be healthy and have

many nutritional qualities. They actually are better

for you than apples. They are low in calories and fat,

but are a rich source of dietary fiber, minerals and

vitamins. Tomatoes help control cholesterol, aide in

weight reduction, supply great antioxidants, contain

lycopene which helps protect your skin and are very

high in potassium and vitamins A and C.

There are over 1,000 varieties of tomatoes grown

by local farmers as well as home gardeners. Tomatoes

are one of the easiest and most common things you

can grow at home. All you need is a small bed or

flower pot, and a little attention. At the restaurant,

local growers provide us with a range of tomatoes

How ‘bout them tomatoes

including: Heirloom, Early Girl, Primo Red, Goliath, Trust,

Geronimo, Sun Sugar, Plum, Better Boy and my favorites,

German Johnson or Cherokee Purple. Another popular

Southern dish is fried green tomatoes. These are simply

any variety of tomato picked before they turn red, then

sliced, battered and fried.

This month we will highlight a very simple, but

delicious Southern recipe. It is my version

of the perfect tomato sandwich.




2 pieces of your

favorite white bread

(very lightly toasted)

2 slices vine ripened

tomatoes, peeled

Salt and Pepper to taste

Dukes Mayonnaise

Lay tomato slices on a paper towel,

lightly salt and pepper, and let rest. Lightly toast bread

and spread mayonnaise on both slices. Place sliced

tomatoes in the middle and enjoy! Or for an upscale

taste, add fresh mozzarella cheese and basil.

Do you have your own version of the perfect tomato

sandwich? Share your special recipe by e-mailing

Morris, owner of Rhett’s Restaurant, Personal

Chef & Catering in Southern

Pines, can be reached

at (910) 695-3663.

Fresh grown


provided by

David’s Produce

in Ellerbe and

Millstone Farm in


Never too early to have life in order


On a daily basis, it is evident that so many of us

have not thought about the “what if” of life. Or

we have thought about it, but we probably have

not put the appropriate documents in place or spoken to

our loved ones about it.

What would happen to your estate? Who would take

care of you, your spouse or your family? I cannot

stress the importance of having life in order regardless

of age.

An advance health care directive (also known as a living

will, personal directive, advance directive or advance

decision) are instructions given by individuals specifying

what actions should be taken for their health in the event

that they are no longer able to make decisions due to

illness or incapacity. It also appoints a person to make

such decisions on their behalf. A living will is one form

of advance directive, leaving instructions for treatment.

Another form authorizes a specific type of power of

attorney (POA) or health care proxy, where someone is

appointed by the individual to make decisions on their

behalf when they are incapacitated.

People may also have a combination of both.

Professionals often encourage having both documents to

provide the most comprehensive guidance regarding their

care. A POA is a written authorization to represent or act

on another’s behalf in private affairs, business or some

other legal matters. If a loved one is diagnosed with any

memory condition, it is even

more important to immediately

act on these decisions and

have all requests documented

legally. Choosing the perfect

individual can be difficult as you

want to choose someone who

would respect your wishes,

not theirs. Typically a child,

relative or friend is able to

fulfill the duties; however,

OutreachNCAugust 2011 13

Continuum of Care

Elizabeth Ragsdale

an attorney or geriatric care manager can also act as the

responsible party.

Throughout my everyday encounters working with

seniors and their families, there are some important

things to think about. Discussing lease agreements,

managing funds and making life changing decisions such

as a move to senior living are tasks that require proper

thought and guidance.

Although these discussions are not easy, I strongly

encourage you to think about the “what if” and have plans

in place before undue burdens are left. Each day we are

sure to have a situation that is uncontrollable, but your

end of life care should not be one of them.

Ragsdale, marketing director at Fox Hollow Senior Living,

can be reached at (910) 695-0011 or




14 OutreachNCAugust 2011

You answer the phone...

“Hi Grandma, this is John. I’m in a bit of trouble

and need some help from you. Could you send me a

Western Union money transfer for $500 right away?”

It’s the middle of the night. The call woke you from

a deep sleep. You cannot find your glasses. You want

to help your grandson. As hard as it is to say ‘no’ to

him, that is exactly what you should do. Ask him to

call back in the morning, or to give you a number

where you can call him. More than likely, this caller

was not your grandson but instead a fraudent attempt

to take money. This type of fraud is being perpetrated

on seniors nationwide.

Unfortunately, this is just one type of telephone

and electronic fraud designed to get money and

information from unsuspecting people. Fraud does

not just happen to senior citizens, but they are by far

the largest group being targeted.

The Computer Protection Division of the North

Carolina Attorney General’s office received 21,879

complaints from state residents last year. The

complaints included health care, lending, Do Not Call

violations, telemarketing fraud, collections and credit.

Unwanted telephone calls and telemarketing fraud

were the third and fourth most common complaints.

The Federal Communications Commission has

designated Aug.1-7 as National Fraud Awareness

Week to bring attention to the many kinds of fraud

going on via both telephone and computer.

David Kirkman, assistant Attorney General for North

Carolina, is the manager of the elder fraud prevention

project. Asked if fraud was increasing, he says that

complaints to the Attorney General’s office were

“holding steady,” but that many incidents of fraud

go unreported. He offers these suggestions to help

seniors be aware of fraud and to avoid it:

• Never share your personal information (such as

your Social Security number, bank account number

or credit card information with anyone you don’t know

who contacts you, no matter whom they claim to be

• Never agree to deposit a check from someone

you don’t know and wire money back to them. While

the check may look real, it is a fake.

• Always read paperwork carefully before you sign

it or pay any money.

• Say no to “now or never” offers, and walk away

from high pressure sale pitches.

• Be very cautious about responding to telemarketers,

e-mail pitches or door-to-door sellers.

Seniors often target of fraud

• Be skeptical about

upfront fees. North Carolina

law makes it illegal to

collect advance fees for some types of work such as

foreclosure assistance and debt settlements help. In

other cases, such as for home repairs, paying the full

bill in advance is never a good idea. If you must pay

upfront, use a credit card when possible to protect

yourself in case things do not go as expected.

• It is best to do business with a company you know

or has been recommended to you by friends and

family. Check out a company before you do business

with them by calling the Consumer Protection Division

at 1-877-NO-SCAM.

Many calls involve donations to a charity. Before

you donate, Greg Tanner, AARP associate director

for AARP North Carolina, recommends the following:

get the charity’s full name, address and telephone

number; ask how much of your donation goes to

fundraising costs; check with the state attorney

general or secretary of state to see if the charity

is registered; check a charity’s rating by the Better

Business Bureau Wise Giving Alliance online at

Other types of telemarketing fraud include offers for

credit cards with lower interest rates, free grants, or

debt consolidation services. Many of these pitches

are made using illegal robo-calls which

ask consumers to press a number to

speak with a representative. To cut

down on such calls, sign up at or call (888)

382-1222 from the number

you wish to register.

The Federal Trade

Commission estimates

that $40 billion a

year is taken from

u n s u s p e c t i n g

c o n s u m e r s .

Caution and

common sense

can keep you

from being

a victim. If

s o m e t h i n g

sounds too good

to be true, it

probably is.

By Ann Robson

Special to OutreachNC

OutreachNCAugust 2011 15



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16 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Almost weekly, I deal with a client who is retiring

and has questions about when to take out

Medicare Part B. Most people get Part A automatically

at age 65, or before age 65 after a 24-month waiting

period on disability. When to take Part B is particularly

confusing if you are on or coming off a Group,

Retirement or Cobra Insurance from an employer. Let’s

briefly consider each one.

Group Insurance: Typically, you would take out

Part B coming off group insurance at age 65, if you

retire then. These days, many people are working

beyond age 65 to get full Social Security Benefits or

to keep a spouse covered until they reach age 65.

This was the case with my own parents. At age 65,

my dad was still working. He had a group insurance

plan with his employer, and my mother was covered

under his plan. At age 65, my mom and dad opted

out of Part B. At age 66, when dad retired and lost

his group coverage, he applied for his Part B as did

mom at age 69. There were no penalties for them

since they had creditable coverage with dad’s group

insurance and applied within eight months of losing

this coverage. (I would suggest applying three months

before losing this coverage.) They also purchased a

Medicare Supplement and Part D prescription drug

coverage at this time.

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When to take out Medicare Part B

Retirement Insurance: Some

people get insurance from their

employer after they retire, and it could

continue beyond age 65. It also often

covers the spouse of the retiree. In this

case, both would take out Part B at

age 65. Original Medicare (Parts A

and B) would become the primary Medicare Update

insurance with the retirement Terri Powell Herlica

insurance being secondary

coverage, assuming both are 65. At this time, you may

also want to compare the cost and benefits of: 1) Original

Medicare, a Medicare Supplement and Part D prescription

drug coverage or 2) Medicare Advantage Plan as opposed

to Original Medicare and Retirement Insurance.

Cobra Insurance: Under federal COBRA law,

companies with at least 20 employees enrolled in a

group plan must allow former workers to buy into the

group health plan for up to 18 months. This is typically

for people under age 65 since COBRA would become

secondary insurance to Medicare after age 65. With this

plan, the former employee pays the entire premium

themselves. In this scenario, at age 65, you should take

out Part B to avoid possible late penalties associated

with delaying enrollment. Every situation is different,

but I have not had a client where it was beneficial for

them to stay with COBRA at age 65 and beyond. Instead,

they utilized Original Medicare (Parts A and B) with one

of the other Medicare choices mentioned above. COBRA

may be able to protect a spouse for up to 36 months in

certain circumstances.

Of course, this is just touching the surface of these

issues, but I hope it offers some direction in making your

choices and planning.

Herlica of the Professional Service Group, LLC is a Retirement

Healthcare Specialist and can be reached at (336) 987-2372 or

Literary Circle

OutreachNCAugust 2011 17

Book Review: Remarkable Creatures by Tracy Chevalier

At first, I was not too interested in this book, which

was written by the author of “Girl With a Pearl

Earring,” which I had enjoyed

reading. I had little interest in

fossils, either hunting for them

or reading about people who do.

However, we can always learn

something new, and in this book

I did.

Set in the early 1800s on

the cliffs of the south coast of

Book Review

Cos Barnes

England, the book describes

at great length, Mary Anning,

a poor, uneducated and rather

strange young woman who

was hit by lightning as a baby. Mary has the gift

for spotting fossils no one else can see. To make

a livelihood for her family, she cleans them and

prepares them for sale or display. Daily, she scours

the cliffs near her home, looking for specimens.

One day, she and her brother hit the jackpot — they

uncovered the fossilized skull of an unknown animal,

which they identified as a crocodile although it had a

huge bulbous eye. This discovery leads to some fame

and fortune for Mary, along with some romance,

although she was treading in male-dominated waters

and was barred from the academic community, who

considered themselves superior to her.

Running interference for her is a new friend, Elizabeth

Philpott, a spinster newly come to Lyme Regis from

London and who shares her interest in searching the

beaches for fossils. Although Elizabeth, a collector of

fish fossils, is somewhat

of a prude, the two

have their interests in

common. Although

they clash over several

things, they eventually

realize their friendship

is stronger than the

pettiness of society.

You will be

captivated by the

picture of the two on

the front cover of the


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Family at heart

of vineyard

By Carrie Frye

Staff Writer

North Carolina

Century Farms

in themselves

harvest a family legacy with

“100 years of continuous

agricultural heritage.’ One

particular century farm in

Willow Spring, just outside

Fuquay-Varina in Wake

County has been in the

Adams family since the

1700s established with a

land grant from the King

of England. Over 100 acres

once produced fertile fields

of tobacco. Although the

family still leases out land

for tobacco farming, the family patriarch,

John Adams, grew his dream of having a

vineyard into a reality in 2006 by planting

muscadine grapes, the grapes first found in

North Carolina.

“Muscadines grow here and are drought

tolerant. If you walk out in the woods, you

wouldn’t have to walk 10 feet without seeing

a muscadine vine,” explains Quincy Adams,

John’s son, who now runs the family vineyard

with his mother Joyce.

John passed away unexpectedly last

October, leaving the vineyard as a labor of

love for the family to plow ahead with. Quincy,

41, has always shared his father’s love for the

land and agriculture.

“Quincy’s heart is here on the farm,” says

Joyce, 69, who manages the tasting room,

greeting visitors with her contagious smile

and offering tastings of the family’s wines and

her own homemade jams and jellies.

“We grow all the fruit. If it doesn’t grow

on the farm, it doesn’t go in a bottle,” adds

Photos by Mollie Tobias

Joyce Adams and her son, Quincy, welcome visitors to Adams Vineyards

off N.C. 42 in Willow Spring Tuesday through Sunday to taste the family’s

collection of wines, three of which have taken honors at the North Carolina

State Fair Wine Competition. For more information, call (919) 567-1010 or

visit the web site at

Quincy with a grin.

Not only is all the fruit grown on the family’s

land, it is also tended and picked by hand.

Adams currently bottles a variety of dry, semisweet,

sweet and fruit wines as well as a red

muscadine grape juice.

“Muscadines are typically better younger,

whereas vinifera are better aged. Timing can

be crucial. One day off in fermentation can

cause too much residual sugar,” describes

Quincy of the winemaking process. “All the

fruit wines are done by hand, which makes

them extremely labor intensive.”

Since October, Quincy has had to pour

himself into winemaking, as his father did not

leave behind any recipes for the family wines.

“My flavors are totally different. I’m

much more meticulous. So it is chemistry,

horticulture and agriculture,” laughs Quincy,

who teaches viniculture or winemaking at

Wake Technical Community College as well

as viticulture, the study of grapes, at Johnson

Technical Community College.

continued page 19

OutreachNCAugust 2011 19

He has been able to

implement a cold stabilization

process to remove tartrates

from the wine and reinvent

all the family wines as well

as adding four new ones,

including a dry White Oak

and Scarlett Oak, a sweet

Clara Breeze, named for his

grandmother, and a blueberry fruit wine.

Knowing the vineyard and winery processes are the

legacy that Quincy is sharing with his wife Robin, his

9-year-old daughter Regan and 10-year-old stepson TJ,

who get to participate in the picking process this year.

“Dad wanted to establish something here for future

generations,” says Quincy.

Picking the grapes leads up to the vineyard’s annual

Grape Stomp Festival, which attracted over 500 visitors

last year. This year’s stomp is set for Saturday, Sept. 17

and sure to be barrels of fun. Three rounds of stomping

produce winners that end with a stomp off with the

previous year’s winner until a new winner is declared.

“Women have won every year,” declares Joyce. “And

no, we don’t keep the stomped juice,” she adds laughing,

“we just let the kids play in it.”

The stomp kicks off a busy fall season for the vineyard

hosting monthly wine and cheese pairings and

participating in the N.C. Muscadine Harvest Festival,

Sept. 24 in Kenansville, the N.C. Seafood Festival, Sept.

30 – Oct. 2, in Morehead City and RiverFest, Oct. 7-9, in


“Right now, we are getting inventory up,” says Quincy.

Adams unique bestsellers right now are Wine Freezers,

which come in margarita, Mojito, sangria, strawberry

and peach flavors. A half bottle of wine gets added to

a small bag or a whole bottle to a large bag with water,

then frozen and poured for a refreshing summertime

wine treat. For colder months, Adams offers a bag of

mulling spices to mix with wine in a crock-pot and

served hot to warm wine drinkers from the inside out.

Aside from the winery, Adams wines are available

at the Cleveland Draft House in Garner. And now that

Joyce has secured a wholesale permit, the mother

and son team is working on

growing their niche market.

“Within two months, we will

have wines going down the

road across North Carolina,”

says Quincy. “We’re slowly

expanding the vineyard.”

The winery and tasting room

welcomes patrons, most of

whom find the vineyard on the North Carolina wine

map, to sample wines Tuesday through Saturday from

10 a.m. to 6 p.m. and Sunday from 2 to 6 p.m.

“I really enjoy meeting the people that come in to

taste the wines,” says Joyce, who along with Robin

highly recommends the Papa Johnny’s White Bliss as

their current favorite. “I’m hoping to expand and retire

all in the same year and give it all to Quincy,” Joyce adds


“I always wanted to farm,” says Quincy, “and be here

on the farm.”

“Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your

plans will succeed.” Proverbs 16:3

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20 OutreachNCAugust 2011



Over My Shoulder

Ann Robson

It is a sad state of affairs

when things have gotten

so bad that we need

to declare a “Happiness

Happens” month in August.

How do you define


There is a Secret Society

of Happy People that

encourages the expression

of happiness and discourages parade-raining. Paraderainers

are those who do not want to hear your happy


The Society wants to “help people recognize more

happiness and encourage them to talk about it.” The

desired side effect of this is contagious happiness.

It is not easy to define happiness. What makes

me happy may drive another person to distraction.

However, since the idea is to spread the word about

happiness, I am pleased to share my happy things.

A beautiful sunset takes my breath away and

makes me happy that I have witnessed one of

nature’s many wonderful sights. Over the years, I

have taken more sunset pictures than I can count.

Now, sunrise is another thing. I have one sunrise

picture. As a non-morning person, I do not usually

watch the sun come up.

A young child’s smile brings happiness, particularly

if the smile is meant for me by a member of my

family. There is something so innocent and trusting

about that smile. I see no reason to tell them that life

is not going to be all smiles.

Having things in my universe in a happy alignment

is always heart-warming. Sure, we all encounter

some less than happy times, but when everything

seems to be perking along the way it should; that


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is happiness. It would be a super-happy event if we

could spread happiness to those who need it most.

There is so much strife, violence, fear and hunger in

the world. We cannot fix it all, but we could fix one

person or family.

My family brings happiness to our home. We are

fortunate to be able to enjoy life, and we do try to

spread some of that good feeling around.

But let’s face it, many people will have a tough time

telling you what happiness means to them. Asking a

few questions may help:

What was your happiest moment recently?

What song makes your toes tap?

What TV show makes you laugh?

What is your favorite childhood food?

Who makes you smile just thinking about them?

Where was your favorite vacation?

What is your favorite holiday?

If you find happiness tough to describe, here

are 31 other words that might help get you to

a more positive state: amaze, amuse, anticipate,

borrow, celebrate, cheer, compassion, contentment,

delight, enthusiam, exuberance, fun, give, gladness,

gratitude, hope, humor, inspiration, joy, love,

nostalgic, optimistic, peace, play, relief, satisfaction,

spirituality, spontaneity, surprise, sweetness and

vitality. Share any of these feelings, and you will

add happiness to both yourself and someone else. An

idea like that could catch on!

We have a tattered copy of the Charles Schulz book

“Happiness is a Warm Puppy,” which is one of my

favorites. It lifts my heart just to leaf through it and

smile at the pictures.

Happy Happiness Month!

E-mail Robson at


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Creative Retirement

The 5th Annual Summer Academy: The War Between

the States—150 Years Since Fort Sumter at

Sandhills Community College (SCC) began on a Monday

and ran through Thursday entertaining a record number

of attendees. College President Dr. John Dempsey

engaged the audience and enlightened the participants

of the politics leading up to the Civil War. Actress and

storyteller, Joan Leotta portrayed the aunt of Belle Boyd,

a Confederate spy during the era leaving the audience

spellbound with her humorous rendition of the aunt’s

perception of Belle’s exploits. Professor Tim Haley

provided a musical tribute of the era’s patriotic tunes in

the pack house of the Malcolm Blue Farm and the event

closed with Chef Warren Lewis’ culinary interpretation

of a period meal during the with Johnny cakes, chicken,

rice, swamp cabbage and blueberry cobbler.

“This mentions just a few presentations. The list goes

on,” says Lori Williams, director of community education

and outreach and coordinator of the event.

The Summer Academy has an advisory committee

consisting of Connie Atwell, Kay Bozarth, Florence

Fick, Pat Green and Rosemary Zuhone, all from Moore

County. The committee meets in December to begin

brainstorming for the summer event.

OutreachNCAugust 2011 21

Summer Academy participants declare program a success

“ A c c o l a d e s

expressed on the

evaluations were


positive,” adds


“The session

entitled Economics

Rampant by

Professor Kirk

Lynch supported

what every speaker

seemed to elude to

that the Civil War

was fought over

politics and money,

and Lynch was the perfect closing to a wonderful week,”

says Lois Holt of Southern Pines.

For more information, contact Williams at (910) 246-

4943 or A photo gallery of the

event can be found at www.sandhillscommunitycollegece. and video clips at

SCCCONED. View the entire SCC Continuing Education

fall semester schedule at

22 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Rotary serves up

thrills on wheels

By Melanie Coughlin

Special to OutreachNC

Once a month, Ethelene

Lassiter eats a nice

nine-ounce centercut

tenderloin and salad from

Carrabba’s Italian Grill in Apex. It

is delivered right to her house by

two chipper men, both members

of the Rotary Club of Apex. The

dinner is a pleasant change from

the everyday meals delivered by

Meals on Wheels of Wake County.

Ethelene appreciates every

meal —foods she likes such as

collard greens, ribs, barbecue and

beans— but she likes the food

from Carrabba’s best. That one

special meal was the brainchild

of Rotarian John Cicero. Members

of his Rotary regularly delivered

dinners for Meals on Wheels,

and Cicero was the club’s most

enthusiastic volunteer, taking

more shifts than any of his peers.

He says he takes seriously Rotary’s

edict to put service above self, and

he saw a way to do that in Meals

on Wheels.

The organization dates back to World War II, when

the first meals were delivered in canteens to British

servicemen. In the United States, Meals on Wheels

formally launched in Philadelphia in the 1950s. Today,

all 50 states have some sort of Meals on Wheels. Though

not every program is affiliated with the official Meals on

Wheels Association of America, all provide free or lowcost

meals to seniors daily. Meals on Wheels of Moore

County delivers not only to seniors but to anyone who

needs food.

“As good a program as it is, the food is kind of bland

because it is going to people who can’t handle a palate

of spicier foods,” Cicero says. “After delivering for a while,

Photo by Mollie Tobias

Carrabba’s Italian Grill proprietor Andrew Craft, left, hands off Carrabba’s meals to Apex

Rotary Club members, Jason Rackley and John Cicero, for their monthly Meals on Wheels

deliveries, which allows both entities to give back to the Apex community.

I thought, ‘I’d love to take these people some real food.’”

Cicero approached Carrabba’s then-manager Eric

Anderson about donating a meal one time. It was a

natural place to make the request because the Apex

Rotary has its weekly meetings at Carrabba’s. Anderson

shocked Cicero by saying he would not donate just one

meal but would instead do it once per month. Anderson’s

own grandmother was involved with Meals on Wheels,

and he understood how the program changed seniors’

lives. After Anderson was plucked to manage a different

Carrabba’s, the new manager, Andrew Kraft, embraced

the idea immediately.

continued page 23

OutreachNCAugust 2011 23

“We as a company have a commitment to our

neighbors to have an active presence in our

community,” says Kraft. “John approached me.

After he explained it, it was definitely something I

wanted to get on board for.”

Kraft makes his entire menu available to Meals on

Wheels clients. They may choose anything on the menu,

even a three-course dinner if they like.

Alan Winstead, executive director of Meals on Wheels

of Wake County, says the unique partnership between

Carrabba’s and Rotary is the only one of its kind out of

the several communities the organization serves.

“It’s certainly a partnership that could be duplicated,”

he says with a note of optimism.

It takes 125 volunteers

for Meals on Wheels of

Wake County to deliver

1,300 meals per day.

That adds up to more

than 300,000 meals

delivered each year.

The organization is

a not-for-profit with

about one-half of its

operations supported

by the government and

the other half coming

from fundraisers and


“Volunteers are the

very soul of our program,”

Winstead says. “They

contribute about threequarters

of a million

dollars in in-kind support

in a year.”

Cicero’s delivery

partner Jason Rackley

says the pair visits with

the people on the route

for a few minutes. They

enjoy hearing about

their grandchildren and

checking in on their


Sherri Lassiter,

Ethelene’s niece, notices

the volunteers’ kindness.

Her mother also receives

dinners from Meals on Wheels. Sherri says

the volunteers are kind and always make a

point of asking if her mother needs anything.

Winstead says he thinks the volunteers get as

much out of the relationships as they give, and

Rackley agrees.

“It’s very rewarding for us, too,” says Rackley.

Meals on Wheels serves multiple areas in the region.

For more information, call (919) 708-4181 in Lee County,

(910) 692-6384 in Moore County, (910) 272-5055 in

Scotland County and (919) 387-6336 in Wake County.

Volunteers are always needed. Learn more by visiting

24 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Senior Moments

Barb Cohea

Once again, I am

adding to the

long list of things I

should no longer try at home.

Mountain biking. I’m sure on

hardpacked trails of . . . say,

a mile or so and FLAT, it

can be fun, but like many

other of life’s activities,

there is a fine line between

a good time and wishing you were dead. Day before

yesterday, I crossed that line.

It was a cool day, no breeze, and both my husband

and I had the day off —a combination for disaster,

especially the part where we’re both off.

My husband is a thrill-seeker, which means he

always looks for trouble. So much so that if there was

a king of thrill seeking he would be it. When we go out

to have fun, if he doesn’t see the bright lights and hear

the dead relatives calling, it hasn’t been a good time.

For me, a near death experience in no way enhances

my day off, and mostly, that’s due to the possibility of


Some people have memories of walks on moonlit

beaches. I remember the time we slid down a mountain


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until tree branches stopped us just short of a cliff. Then

there was the offshore trip. We ran into the Pacific

Ocean’s version of the perfect storm. Thirty-six hours

of screaming winds, raging 30-foot seas while we

drifted toward Japan, and I hurled the entire contents

of my colon. Ah . . . the good life.

And so we got out the mountain bikes, whose use

had pretty much been, up to this point, restricted to

city streets (and not ones in the mountains either).

Our destination was a lake four miles down a one-lane

sand track into the wilderness. Note: the use of the

word “sand.” Maybe I should add “dry” sand, very dry,

in several long stretches. And the sand was thick, very

thick and loose like the kind you walk through up by

the dunes and your legs ache. That kind.

It was fun for about the first 15 seconds. I had the

thrill of moving and birdsong and dappled shade

surrounded me. I felt powerful, and then it started

getting hard to move the pedals in a circle, which

would also move the tires in a circle and propel me


As my bike wobbled, my husband yelled, “Put it in

the lowest gear.”

Besides the fact that I don’t know what that means

as I just flip the gears all over the place until it’s easy

to pedal, I believed it was in the “lowest gear.” Unless,

of course, “lowest” means harder to pedal, and he was

trying to kill me.

My legs finally got “warmed up.” They were really

burned up, but what with the heavy breathing, and

sweat pouring off my person, what’s the difference?

“See? It’s getting easier now,” My husband said,

sucking air.

I would’ve responded, but the options were breathe

and pedal or speak and fall off bike, which did happen

every time the sand got thick enough and the pedals

wouldn’t move at all. We actually had to walk. Did you

know it takes longer to walk a bike than to simply

walk? Scientifically proven.

I would have quit and walked back to the starting

point, but my beet-colored husband, sweating like a

large piggy in the 90 degree heat, proclaimed he was

having fun. Got to the lake, got back and I remember

nothing in between. My legs sure do, but they ain’t

talking. Ah, good times!

Cohea, a freelance writer, can be reached by e-mailing

Five important estate planning documents

It may be the subject matter —death, incapacity and

taxes— that causes us to avoid estate planning.

However, the fact is that, no matter what your age or how

much wealth you’ve accumulated, you need an estate

plan to protect yourself, your loved ones and your assets

— both now while you’re still active as well as after your

death. Having an effective estate plan is one of the most

important things you can do for your family.

Being organized may make your meeting with your

attorney more productive and may expedite the planning

process. But before visiting with your legal counsel, you

need a basic understanding of the documents he or she

may recommend for your plan.

1. Will. A will simply provides instructions for distributing

your assets to your family

and other beneficiaries

upon your death.

2. Durable power of

attorney. A power of

attorney is a legal document

in which you name another

person to act on your behalf.

This person is called your

agent or attorney-in-fact.

You can give your appointed

agent broad or limited

management powers.

3. Health care power of

attorney. A durable power

of attorney for health care

authorizes someone to

make medical decisions for

you in the event you are

unable to do so yourself.

4. Living will. A living will

expresses your intentions

regarding the use of lifesustaining

measures in

the event of a terminal

illness. It expresses what

you want but does not give

anyone the authority to

speak for you.

5. Revocable living

trust. By transferring

assets into a revocable

trust, you can provide for

continued management of

your financial affairs during

your lifetime (when you’re

incapacitated, for example),

at your death and even for

generations to come.

Once you have executed the

appropriate documents for your

planning needs, you should

review them periodically to

ensure they remain up to date.

Baker, a financial advisor with

Wells Fargo Advisors in

Pinehurst can be reached at

(910) 692-3000.

OutreachNCAugust 2011 25

Wells Fargo Advisors does not provide legal or tax

advice. Be sure to consult with your tax and legal advisors

before taking any action that could have tax consequences.

Any estate plan should be reviewed by an attorney who specializes in estate planning and is licensed to practice law in

your state. Trust services available through banking and trust affiliates in addition to non-affiliated companies of Wells Fargo

Advisors. Investments in securities and insurance products are: NOT FDIC-INSURED/NOT BANK-GUARANTEED/MAY LOSE

VALUE. Wells Fargo Advisors, LLC, Member SIPC, is a registered broker-dealer and a separate non-bank affiliate of Wells

Fargo & Company. ©2010 Wells Fargo Advisors, LLC. All rights reserved.

State-of-the-art wound healing centers

in Pinehurst & Rockingham

Every wound has its unique set of circumstances. FirstHealth of the Carolinas’ Wound Care

& Hyperbaric Centers are equipped and staffed to address them all, with most treatments covered

by Medicare/Medicaid, HMOs, and other private insurance plans. We are experts at caring for people

whose open sores have resisted traditional treatment.

For more information, call (910) 715-5901 in Moore County or (910) 417-3636 in Richmond County.

Planning Ahead

James Michael Baker


26 OutreachNCAugust 2011

There are a few things you can do to specifically ward off

memory loss. Most importantly, EXERCISE YOUR BRAIN!



• Every row of

9 numbers must

include all digits

1 through 9

• Every column

of 9 numbers

must include all

digits 1 through 9

• Every 3 by 3

subsection of the

9 by 9 square

must include all

digits 1 through 9

Grey Matter

See Grey Matter Puzzle Answers on Page 28


Rearrange the letters in each word

below to spell the names of words

pertaining to National Dog Day.






1. Takes off

6. Gillette product

11. Hug

13. Styled with


15. Pigeons’ housing

16. Animal fat

17. Barely get, with


18. More disgusting


20. ___ v. Wade

21. Actress Sorvino

23. Safari sight

24. Oil source

25. Cavern, in poetry

27. ___ and outs

28. Feasts

29. Thong

31. Carbon residue (pl.)

32. Mass of developing


34. Sing like Bing

36. Malady

39. Bake, as eggs

40. Action film staple

41. Pound sounds

43. High school dance

44. Jalopy

46. Anger, with “up”

47. “Baloney!”

48. Summertime (2


50. ___-Atlantic

51. Picture

53. Hawser

55. Child’s movable

walking assist (pl.)

56. Internet seller

57. Eye sores

58. Doesn’t ignore


1. Tobacco use

2. Turns to show other


3. “___ we having fun


4. R-rated, maybe

5. Use elbow grease on

6. Isuzu model

7. Gulf V.I.P.

8. Blast

9. Fragrant

10. What a cobbler


11. Swelling

12. Print using metal

plate and acid

13. Nuisances

14. Considers

19. Extra large

22. Painting, for one

(2 wd)

24. Panasonic rival

26. Overthrow, e.g.

28. Soft

30. Carbonium, e.g.

31. “Do the Right

Thing” pizzeria owner

33. Folded like a fan

34. Colored


35. Mob disbursement

law (2 wd)

37. Vilely

38. Slats

39. Bit of parsley

40. Impulses

42. Exodus


44. Habits

45. Former capital of


48. Acute

49. Q-Tip

52. Chipper

54. Deception

An alternative to traditional LTC insurance

Fortunately, many seniors have saved a nest egg for

retirement, some of those dollars specifically set

aside for late-in-life health care needs. And deservedly

so, as the most recent reported cost of Assisted Living

facilities in North Carolina is $32,000 per year and

average Nursing Home costs are $72,000 per year.

Current statistics provided by the U.S. Dept. of Health

and Human Services reveal that about 70 percent

of individuals over age 65 will require some type of

long-term care (LTC) services during their lifetime and

over 40 percent will receive care in a nursing home.

Men are averaging a 2.2-year stay and women about

a 3.7-year stay. Take these figures and calculate an

expected rise in health care costs and ten years from

now, each of us may be looking at a potential total LTC

health care bill of $200,000 or more.

Despite the fact that someone might tell us we have

a 70 percent chance of needing LTC services, as an

individual, our chance of needing LTC will be either 0

percent or 100 percent. We will either need assistive

long-term care, or we won’t. For this reason, one of

the biggest objections to purchasing any type of LTC

coverage is the aspect of, “What if I pay premiums

for years and never use the coverage? Then I’ve lost

all my money.”

Well now, for those that have set aside savings for

a possible LTC event, there is a solution. Due to the

Pension Protection Act of 2006 and taking effect in

January 2010, a significant advantage is available to

an account owner, who chooses to reposition a portion

of their financial assets into this relatively new product.

It is an annuity that offers expanded coverage for LTC

costs. This annuity offers a fixed, tax-deferred rate

of return (currently in the two to three percent range)

and should the need for LTC occur, the policy offers a

benefit to double, triple or quadruple the initial deposit

depending upon the insurance carrier and the amount

of time the policy is owned. Possibly the most beneficial

aspect of this product is when LTC services are never

needed; the account holder (or their beneficiary) simply

receives their initial deposit back, plus interest.

Most people who are purchasing these types of policies

are ones who have indeed saved for the potential LTC

event. They are taking deposits from their savings

(possibly a Money Market or Certificate of Deposit/CD)

and repositioning those dollars into an annuity with LTC

benefits. There is a minimum deposit into these types

of annuities, typically $25,000 to $50,000 depending on

the insurance carrier.

Another popular funding option for the LTC annuity

is through a 1035 rollover provision. The “1035

exchange” of cash value

in a current annuity,

rolled to the new annuity,

allows cash value to be

preserved and placed into

a new LTC annuity without

tax implications or loss in

value. The account

holder still has an

annuity, but now with

the added benefit of

OutreachNCAugust 2011 27

doubling or tripling their dollars in case they are

needed for LTC health care.

Granted it takes significant dollar amounts to fund the

LTC annuity, but many people have already set aside

dollars for possible health care costs. By repositioning

assets into a LTC Annuity, if long-term care is needed,

your dollars have the potential to increase significantly,

but just as importantly, when LTC is not needed, you

don’t risk losing your hard-earned money.

Donner, CRPC, is a Chartered Retirement Planning

Counselor, has a Bachelor of Science in Nursing, is licensed

in LTC and is NAIC Partnership Certified. She can be reached

at (919) 460-6076 or .

Please note that the information given here should not be construed as tax

advice and that you should consult your own personal tax advisor for your

particular situation.

Do you need help caring for a

spouse or parent?

Personal Care | Private Duty

Household Chores


Respite Care

No Contracts

Long-Term Care

Elizabeth Donner, CRPC

Our caregivers are experienced, self-employed, independent contractors.

We interview each applicant and do reference, education & background checks.


28 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Remember when you were

first learning how to drive

a car? One of the first things you

possibly did was listen to your

friends, family or other advisors

to determine the simple rules of

the road. Perhaps before you took

your final test you went down to

the Department of Transportation,

and obtained a rulebook and

read through it just once. I would

suggest that you have almost followed the same basic

steps when you learned to play bridge. You learned

from your friends and other advisors, but I bet you never

even cracked open the “Laws of Duplicate Bridge”.

Knowing some of the basic laws of bridge can be

helpful, as your more “road tested” opponents will

know them. Those more experienced opponents will

invariably call the director when you happen to step

over the line. Don’t worry, we all do it, and we’ll all

do it again –all we can do is be prepared for when

it happens.

One of the rules that often enters into play is Law

16 that deals with “Unauthorized Information.” Here’s

an example: You open Two Hearts, weak. Your left

hand opponent passes. Your partner passes, and your

right hand opponent decides to balance on their 9 high

card points. Your right hand opponent COULD (but not

necessarily) be guilty of acting on the information that

your left hand opponent wanted to bid, but could not

really decide on what to bid. They must pretend their

partner passed in tempo, and they need to be equally

sure that the call they made would have been made in

the absence of any break in tempo. Call the director

Bridge Club

Nancy Dressing

Playing bridge by the laws

when there has been a significant break in the tempo

of the auction followed by a PASS.

Another rule that you should be familiar with is a

lead out of turn –Laws 53 through 56. Whether at the

beginning of the play, or in the middle of the hand, you

should all be familiar with the procedure that follows

that infraction.

Laws 29 and 30 deal with “Calls out of Rotation”

covering infractions like opening out of turn, or making

a bid in the middle of the auction when it wasn’t your

turn to bid. You will always have the right to accept

these bids, and it is most often the wrong decision to do

so. Law 27 deals with insufficient calls, and before you

request your opponent to make a bid sufficient, you may

choose to accept the call, and perhaps make a bid at

a lower level than you may have otherwise needed to.

Sometimes, but not always, infractions at the table

can help you, and you are within the laws to benefit

from your opponents mistakes. Unfortunately, you

may not benefit from your own mistakes, such as your

partner’s hesitation, making you choose an alternative

action from the logical one.

Bridge is a timed event. The laws state that you

should not prolong play with tactics such as playing the

tricks out when you know you have all the remaining

tricks. Do your best to claim (after stating a line of

play) and get onto the next hand as expediently as

possible. It is all in the “Laws of Duplicate Bridge.’ The

2008 edition of this rulebook is available at the web


Be sure to have a look.

Have a bridge question, ask Nancy Dressing of

Nancy’s Game in Southern Pines. She can be reached

by e-mailing

Grey Matter Answers







Regular check-ups best medicine in women’s health


Living life as a woman comes with

plenty of perks such as great fashion

and a fantastic sense of intuition,

among other things. On the other hand, being a

woman also means having specific health needs. From

heart disease, cancer and osteoporosis to issues as a

result of autoimmune diseases, women need to be

educated about gender-specific health issues.

Women and men share many of the same diseases,

but have very different experiences with them. Women

also tend to suffer from certain diseases at a higher

rate than men. These diseases include osteoarthritis,

obesity and depression. In fact, women are more prone

to autoimmune conditions like lupus or polymyalgia

rheumatica (PMR) than their male counterparts.

Perhaps one of the reasons that women struggle with

health-related issues more than men has to do with

the fact that they tend to be the caretakers of others,

especially their families. Some women may ignore

a health challenge, because they have too much to

do or most likely because someone else’s needs take

precedence over their own.

Following a healthy eating plan, getting plenty of rest

and exercising regularly as well as receiving regular

checkups with a physical every year are all ways women


Rita Pena

OutreachNCAugust 2011 29

can help themselves stay healthier. Early

detection is also the best weapon in fighting

many health issues women face such as:

• Pap smear and pelvic exam: A woman should

have exams annually. If prior results were normal for

three years, then consider going every other year.

• Colonoscopy: Beginning at the age 50, once every

10 years UNLESS there is a family history of colon

polyps. Then it may be recommended at an earlier age.

• Skin cancer screening: Annually after the age of 50

or sooner if you notice discolored moles, beauty marks

or other abnormalities.

• Thyroid Hormone test: Every five years beginning

at the age 35 or sooner and more often if you have

symptoms of a thyroid condition or a family history

of it.

• Bone mineral density test: At the onset of

menopause or the age of 65. This test will be repeated

at your doctor’s discretion.

Women should celebrate their uniqueness by

ensuring they are addressing health issues in a timely

manner to lessen the risks of disease.

Pena, community rehabilitation director at Quail Haven

Village, can be reached at (910) 215-9667.

Walter’s wife called and said this:

“ Walter, don’t forget your swimsuit – water’s just fine! ”

Walter heard this:

“ Just forget your swimsuit...

won’t have mine! ”

Catch every word with CapTel® 800 or CapTel® 800i,

and you’ll never be caught with your pants down.

A free service provided by CapTel North Carolina is the solution for people with a hearing loss.

A CapTel® phone allows them to hear and read everything the person on the other line says to them!

CapTel is a registered

trademark of Ultratec, Inc.

For more information about the service

or to get a CapTel® 800 or CapTel® 800i

phone, contact:

- (800) 233-9130



30 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Puppy love good

for all ages

Pets, like people, have

stories. The Foushee

family of pets is no

By Carrie Frye

Staff Writer

exception, with five cats and five dogs that were all

found or rescued.

Simon, a black and brown dachshund, is a puppy

mill rescue, but now acts as top dog to his mom, Gail

Foushee, 53, co-owner with her husband John of

Big Bloomers Flower Farm in Sanford. At their house

just across the road, there are two fenced garden

sanctuaries, one for the cats and one for the dogs,

where Simon can often be found chasing his playmate

Carly, a long-haired dachshund, or trailing behind Gail.

“He’s my shadow,” she says holding Simon lovingly

tucked in her arms. “When we first got him, he had

zero personality, but he had only lived in a box. When I

would leave him, he would just sit at the door. Before I

had my children, my pets were my children, and after I

had children, they are still my children,” Gail adds with

a quick laugh. “As my children have grown and become

more independent, these are the little faces that are

waiting and so happy to see me when I get home. It is

the best of both worlds to be able to work in the yard

and have my pets with me.”

With his family’s love, Simon has blossomed into one

healthy, happy dog, which Gail also attributes to her

veterinarian Diane Schaller, DVM, whose role in rescuing

animals from the puppy mill is the reason she has Simon

in her life.

“Dr. Schaller is a blessing to animals and their owners

in Lee County,” declares Gail. “She has even come out to

the house when we had a kitty with cancer.”

Schaller, 43, opened her own clinic, Willow Creek

Animal Hospital, three years ago, serves as the

Photo by Carrie Frye/OutreachNC

Gail Foushee loves her dachshunds, Carly, left, and Simon as well as

the rest of her pet family with three more dogs and five cats, and

the joy they bring to her life.

veterinarian on the Lee County Board of Health and is

still willing to make a house call when needed.

“When I was growing up, vets came out to see

livestock. Veterinary medicine is certainly changing. Ten

years ago, pets were like family, but now they are family.

Sometimes, it is just easier on the owner and the critter

to make the house call,” says Schaller smiling.

Although pets house calls are not completely out of

the ordinary, Schaller believes them to be an especially

beneficial service for a senior pet owner or an owner

with a senior pet. As family members, pets age alongside

their owners and often deal with similar aging issues.

“Getting out and walking is great for the human/

animal bond, not to mention good for the cardiovascular

health of the pet and the owner,” she says.

continued page 31

OutreachNCAugust 2011 31

Photo by Mollie Tobias

Dr. Diane Schaller, DVM, owner of Willow Creek Animal Hospital in

Sanford, gives Lucy, a rescued beagle mix, a check-up. A few of her

other happy patients are seen below on page 30.

Recent studies agree, indicating that seniors who

own pets may have a reduced risk of developing heart

disease, lower blood pressure and better mental health.

“Emotional attachments with pets are amazing. They

are living our lives with us, in the kitchen with us and

sleeping where we sleep,” says Schaller, herself a mother

to four sons, three rescued dogs, three cats as well as

some exotic pets, too.

Just as with people, preventative veterinary medicine

is often key. Parasite control as well as dental care may

prevent later heart, lung and kidney diseases. Schaller

also encourages owners to learn first aid for their pets

and teaches a course in partnership with the Lee County

American Red Cross.

“For people, you call 9-1-1, but in the animal world,

owners are the first responders and can make the

difference,” says Schaller.

Schaller stays well versed in the stories of her clients

be it human, feline, canine or otherwise. She also

partners with other vets for clients who split their

retirement time between North Carolina and Florida to

have continuity of care.

“Helping keep a family member healthy is important,

and I truly enjoy my role as part of a health care team.

Hopefully, I have made a positive impact in someone’s

life.” she says. “I never forget for me that it is an honor to

be a part of people’s lives.”

32 OutreachNCAugust 2011

According to the Centers for Disease Control

and Prevention, African-Americans are

more than twice as likely to have a foot or

leg amputated due to diabetes than non-Hispanic


“Many studies have shown that African-Americans

have a higher prevalence

of medical conditions that

affect healing rates, including

wounds often related to

diabetes,” says David Strom,

M.D., medical director of the

Wound Care and Hyperbaric

Center at FirstHealth Moore

Regional Hospital.

Dr. Strom and the staff of

the Wound Care & Hyperbaric

Center offer these tips to help

Dr. David Strom reduce their risk of underlying

conditions for chronic wounds:

Be informed: Twice as many African-American

adults are diagnosed with diabetes by a doctor, and

Hospital Health

Ethnicity plays role in risk for chronic wounds

they are twice as likely to die from the disease as

compared to non-Hispanic whites. Talk to your doctor

about your family history and other risk factors.

Feet first: Nearly eight out of 10 African-

Americans ages 40 and older with diabetes had a

foot examination in 2006. It is especially important

for diabetics to perform foot inspections daily and to

have their feet examined at least once a year by their

health care provider.

Step it up: Only 26 percent of African-Americans

over the age of 17 participate in a regular leisure

physical activity. Exercise and physical activity can

lead to better circulation, and improving the flow of

oxygen to wounds is an important factor in healing.

Go slow: Extra pounds can worsen conditions

that hinder wound healing and more than half of

all African-American women over the age of 19 are

categorized as obese while 37 percent of African-

American men of the same age fall into this group.

Since it takes our stomachs 20 minutes to tell our

brains that we are full, consider using teaspoons,

salad forks, children’s utensils or even chopsticks to

help you take smaller bites and eat less.

Bring it down: About 40 percent of African-

American men and women have hypertension. Help

control your blood pressure by setting aside “me”

time every day to stop multi-tasking and relax even

if it is just taking a long bath, enjoying a favorite

television show or listening to calming music.

Put it out: While cigarette smoking has declined,

nearly one in four African-American men smoke

compared to 18 percent of African-American women.

Smoking can lead to hardening of the arteries and

higher glucose and cholesterol levels in the blood.

Have it looked at: Seek treatment if a wound has

not healed in 30 days or shows signs of infection

such as an increase in pain, redness or swelling,

foul wound odor or a change in color or amount of

drainage from the wound.

For more information, contact FirstHealth Moore

Regional Hospital’s Wound Care and Hyperbaric Center

at (910) 715-5901 or visit

Reap health benefits of volunteering

Many of us 50 years of age or better have

been raised with the view that there are

things greater than self —one of them being

community— and we have always tried to stay true to

that principle. But as we grow “better” the world keeps

getting bigger, we often feel disconnected in the midst

of our modern high-tech, social networking, facebook,

LinkedIn and tweeting cyberspace “communities.”

The good news is that each of us can still make

a difference in a very personal way, in our own

sphere, in our own backyard. Volunteering provides

this opportunity to help, to make an impact, to positively

change lives and share our gifts and talents.

Retired Senior Volunteer

Program (RSVP)

volunteer, Paul Newnam

does just that by being

a volunteer instructor at

the Moore County Senior

Enrichment Center

teaching a bi-weekly

stretching class. His

classes are based on

modified Hatha yoga and

therapeutic stretching.

Former director of Udine

Boat Club and Philadelphia

Triathlon Club, he also

competed in masters

rowing and strength

training. Keeping himself

and others in shape is a

big commitment for Paul,

and volunteering is how

he continually shares his

exuberance for life.

What talents and

passions would you like

to share? No matter what

you are good at or what

your interests are, there

is a volunteer opportunity

waiting for you. RSVP

has hundreds of unique

opportunities The choice

is yours.

Like Paul, over 600

RSVP volunteers are

actively giving back to

their communities and

reaping the dividends.

Stay true to the principles of your

life and consider volunteering!

For information on available

volunteer opportunities in Moore

and the surrounding counties,

contact Sheila Klein, director for

Moore County RSVP, at (910)

215-0900 or e-mail sklein@ or in

Wake County, contact Kristi

OutreachNCAugust 2011 33


Shiela Klein

Tally, Interim Volunteer Coordinator at the City of Raleigh’s

Community Services Department - Senior Corps Programs

Office at (919) 996-6295 or

34 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Bless Her Heart:


musings from

bestselling author

Celia Rivenbark

By Melanie Coughlin

Special to OutreachNC

North Carolina writer Celia

Rivenbark is one-half

cultured Southern Belle and

one-half hillbilly country girl. She has

strong feelings about issues as varied

as the environment and the size of Kim

Kardashian’s engagement ring. A veteran

Methodist Sunday school teacher, she

can nonetheless cuss up a red streak.

The dualities of this bestselling Southern humor writer

whose new book, “You Don’t Sweat Much for a Fat Girl,”

comes out this month, add up to 100 percent hilarious

for her readers.

“She is laugh-out-loud funny without being vulgar or

political, and nothing and no one escapes her humor,”

says Audrey Moriarty, executive director of Pinehurst’s

Given Memorial Library. “She reminds me of a female

Jerry Seinfeld with a touch of Jill Conner Browne.”

Rivenbark is often compared to other humorists.

She has been called “Dave Barry if he were a woman”

and “Erma Bombeck if she were from the South,” but

comparisons fail to peg a writer who muses on Southern

life in a way that appeals to people everywhere. Her

weekly column is syndicated across the nation, including

Raleigh’s “News & Observer,” but surprisingly, one of the

biggest fan bases for her column is in Sacramento, Ca.

From her five books –among them bestsellers, awards

and many accolades– and decades of columns, readers

will learn things like why Miss North Carolina is too nice

to hate and how “The Sopranos” characters could never

survive in the South.

“You can’t shoot a guy full of holes on okra and

tomatoes and spoon bread,” she writes of the notorious

Photo by Mollie Tobias

Celia Rivenbark launches her book tour for “You Don’t Sweat Much for a Fat Girl” at

Quail Ridge Books in Raleigh, Aug. 16, and at McIntyre’s Books in Pittsboro, Sept. 24.

See her website for new dates.

Italians in her 2004 book ‘We’re Just Like You, Only

Prettier.’ “No, you eat Southern food, and you just want

to hug your mama.”

Rivenbark, 54, is a pixie of a woman who looks twenty

years younger than she is. She lives in a purple cottage

near Wilmington’s Riverwalk with her husband Scott

and their daughter Sophie, 14. She grew up in a tiny

N.C. town and is true blue to North Carolina treasures

like Tar Heels basketball, Krispy Kreme doughnuts,

Cheerwine and vinegar-based barbecue. Gracious and

charming, Rivenbark can get by with saying things like

“Listen, darlin’… and by ‘darlin,’ I mean b----” and still

be positively adorable.

“I have a terrible potty mouth,” Rivenbark


She warns that “You Don’t Sweat Much for a Fat Girl” is

a little edgier than her previous five titles.

“With each book, I get a little rowdier so this is more

of a hard PG-13, borderline R in places,” Rivenbark says.

On the day of the book’s release, Rivenbark is giving

her premiere reading Tuesday, Aug. 16 at 7:30 p.m. at

Quail Ridge Books and Music in Raleigh. Nancy Olson,

owner of Quail Ridge, is thrilled to have the nationally

bestselling author kick off the book tour at her store.

continued page 35

OutreachNCAugust 2011 35

“Having Celia Rivenbark here is like hitting a home

run!” she says. “Her books are well-written, very funny

and relevant. They absolutely sparkle.”

On book tours, Rivenbark hits all the media with

television appearances, radio interviews and signings

where she enjoys meeting her readers.

“Book tours are such a treat. I get to actually meet the

people who read my stuff, and it just feels good to know

that I gave them a chuckle,” Rivenbark says. “I’m just so

grateful for everyone who takes the time to come to a

signing because I know how many other things they

could’ve chosen to do. It’s humbling.”

Rivenbark’s life is not all glamorous media tours,

though. She balances writing with her roles as wife and

mother while also being the primary support person for

her 83-year-old mother. She and her mother, who lives

only three miles away, eat lunch together every day.

“When you’re the go-to person for an elderly

parent and a teenage daughter, it can be draining

and rewarding,” Rivenbark says, citing as an example

the time she juggled picking up her mother from

the emergency room with getting her daughter to

play rehearsal on time. “I am the poster child for the

sandwich generation. I balance it the same way every

woman does. A second at a time.”

Last year, Rivenbark’s balancing act was even more

treacherous when her husband went through six

months of chemotherapy for lymphoma. She took a

break from writing regularly for the first time in 30 years.

“I just couldn’t find ‘the funny,” Rivenbark says of that

dark time. “Thankfully, he’s well now, and he doesn’t

even care if I joke about the cancer thing. He’s simply

the best.”

Though her husband, who she calls “duhhubby”

in her books, and daughter “Princess”

Sophie are prime fodder for new writing

material, both are good sports about it.

“They’re very supportive. They know that

they’re going to be recurring characters and

never protest, oddly enough,” she says.

Perhaps it is because they relate to the

creative process. Scott was a sports writer

for the same newspaper as Celia when the

two met, and he went on to author a true

crime book. Sophie enjoys writing, too,

though she prefers fiction. She does not object to her

mother’s work, even when it deals with delicate topics.

Likewise, readers are rarely rankled, probably because

they know Rivenbark’s style. As for the rare criticism,

Rivenbark takes it in stride with one exception. A

woman wrote a scathing review of a Rivenbark book on

Amazon, concluding her comments with, “I can’t believe

I wasted my time checking it out at the library.”

“You know, if you pay money for my book and you

hate it, that’s ok, but if you got it for free, shut the hell

up,” Rivenbark retorts tongue in cheek.

Rivenbark is currently writing her first fiction book, a

serious tale of a mother in her 80s who is grappling with

arranging care for her Down’s Syndrome son before

she dies. It is a surprising turn for a writer who is also

working on her seventh humor book. Tentatively titled

“That’s Not a Salad Fork, You Stupid ----,” it is an etiquette

book that promises to be as side-splittingly funny –and

just as clever– as her previous works.

“One of the things that I try to get across to readers,

particularly those outside the South, is that just because

we speak colorfully in the South, it doesn’t mean that

we’re stupid,” says Rivenbark.

With the brainy, savvy Celia Rivenbark representing

the South, there is little chance of readers thinking

badly of the South. And if they do, Rivenbark knows just

the way to win over skeptics.

“If they just bite into a hushpuppy,” she says, “they will


Bless their hearts.

Read freelance writer Melanie Coughlin’s blogs at

Photo by Mollie Tobias

Humor writer Celia Rivenbark dotes on her

daughter Sophie, who is also the subject of many

stories in Rivenbark’s bestselling books.

36 OutreachNCAugust 2011 Taking the Class Out of Yoga


never saw myself as a yoga-type person but

then I read “Eat, Pray, Love,” whose author,

the glowy, flowy Elizabeth Gilbert, described

how her deep and intense voyage of self-discovery,

which included dumping her perfectly nice husband

and visiting several different continents, led her to

realize that she could eat nine pizzas at one sitting

in Italy and still feel good about it if she was headed

to India to do some yoga.

I think there was a little more to the book than that,

but that was my favorite part.

Yoga just sounds so cool. Our teacher, a young

woman fairly bursting with good health, meets us

where we are, so to speak.

“You can rest when you need to,” she said on the

first day of class, seeming to look at me for a long

time—perhaps because I was the only one who had

never had so much as a smidgen of yoga before. She

knew this because I announced it, repeatedly, so she’d

set the bar pretty low.

I was delighted that she understood, and so I did rest.

For an hour. Just lay there on the purple yoga mat my

friend Christy Kramer got at a yard sale for fitty cent

and loaned me when I told her I didn’t want to invest a

whole lot of money into this yoga stuff until I was sure

I’d like it.

Sure, some of the other women looked puzzled when

I lay down and stayed down, but what can I tell you?

It was the first time in for-freakin’-ever that I’d had

some me-time, phone off, panties granny, and it felt


Laying there while the others practiced some serious

deep breathing and challenging poses, I understood

why everybody loves yoga. I went to sleep.

And was awakened an hour later by the instructor

gently kneading my thigh. My perfect, enormous thigh.

“Uhhh, trying to sleep

here,” I mumbled, but she

just smiled one of those

real peaceful yoga-induced

smiles. “We want to keep

the muscles as relaxed as


Was she high? If I was

any more relaxed, I’d be

in an urn on somebody’s

mantel. I was deliciously

relaxed and now

understood why people

who take naps in the

middle of the day always

feel so refreshed. At this rate, I’d be one of those

irritating people who has a license plate holder that

reads: my other car is a yoga mat! OK, maybe not.

Yoga is going to be a much better fit for me than,

say, Pilates, which, because I was raised Southern

Baptist, I mispronounced for a really long time until my

unchurched, heathen friend told me it had nothing to

do with Pontius Pilate.

“It’s pronounced puh-lot-eez,” she said with clear

irritation. She is one of those snooty types who talks a

lot about how all the hypocrites are in church and she

believes that God is everywhere around her.

Not meaning to be cruel, I hope for His sake this

wasn’t true the day she seriously cut one in yoga class.

That’s the dirty little secret about yoga. All the pooting

that goes on. Sure, you can try to sneak it out in low

gear, so to speak, but everybody still knows. So while

you’re in your Loving Warrior Stance when you should

be breathing deeply and feeling the life force gum up

your chakras or whatever, you’re just worried to death

that the whole class is going to hear you fart out loud.

I’m not sure how Elizabeth Gilbert dealt with that

because there’s no way you could eat nine pizzas for

lunch and then go to yoga, even if it was a few days

later. You’d still be floating up in the air like that idiot

balloon boy.

The instructor says that all of this openness to the

will of the universe takes time. One doesn’t just leap

into meditation. It can takes years of practice, even

Elizabeth Gilbert said that. But, in the meantime, while

I’m waiting for that to kick in, I’ll continue to eat pizza.

Just for the sake of my heart, you know.

From “You Don’t Sweat Much for a Fat Girl” by Celia

Rivenbark. Copyright (c) 2011 by the author and reprinted

by permission of St. Martin’s Press, LLC.

Senior Shorts

Celia Rivenbark

Excerpt from her new book,

“You Don’t Sweat Much

for a Fat Girl”

Celia Rivenbark was born and

raised in Duplin County, N.C., which

had the distinction of being the

nation’s number one producer of

hogs and turkeys during a brief,

magical moment in the early 1980s.

Her new book comes out August 16.

Latest treatment for degenerative disc disease

OutreachNCAugust 2011 37

Millions of Americans suffer from severe back and neck pain as a result of Degenerative Disc Disease.

DDD, as it is often referred to, is not really a “disease” in the common sense of the word, but rather a term

used to describe a process or condition that develops

gradually and worsens over time. DDD indicates

that the cartilage-like discs between the spinal

Back Care

Michael L. Hall, D.C.

vertebral joints are the primary

cause of the symptoms, and

that the degenerative changes

are rather advanced. To some

degree intervertebral discs lose

their flexibility, elasticity and

shock absorbing characteristics

as we age.

The most common

symptom of degenerative

disc disease of the lumbar

spine is lower back pain

(lumbalgia). If the cervical spine is affected, the most

common symptom is neck pain (cervicalgia). When

degenerative disc disease causes compression of the

cervical nerve roots there may be shoulder pain, arm

pain, and pain in the hand/fingers (neuritis, neuralgia,

radiculitis), and may be associated with numbness

and tingling (paresthesia). When degenerative disc

disease causes compression of the lumbar nerve

roots there may be butt pain, hip pain, leg pain and

pain in the feet or toes.

In the past, a patient suffering from disc problems

was usually given pain medications, instructed to

refrain from physical activities and referred for physical

therapy. When they did not improve, they were sent

for spinal surgery or simply told to learn to live with

it. Since 2001, when the FDA approved non-surgical

spinal decompression therapy, things have changed.

Spinal decompression therapy is a non-invasive, nonsurgical

treatment performed on a special, computercontrolled

table similar in some ways to an ordinary

traction table. A single disc level is isolated and by

using specific traction and relaxation cycles throughout

the treatment, along with proper positioning, negative

pressure can actually be created within the disc. It

works by gently separating the offending disc five to

seven millimeters creating negative pressure inside

the disc to pull water, oxygen and nutrients into the

disc, re-hydrating a degenerated disc and bringing in

the nutrients needed to heal the torn fibers and halt

the degenerative process. Thus, the shock-absorbing

properties are restored and a normal life can be


Hall, D.C. of Triangle Disc Care in Raleigh can be

reached at (919) 571-2515 or

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38 OutreachNCAugust 2011

was recently traveling with my 12-year-old nephew, and I was apparently ranting

I about some squirrel or bird that ate my blackberry. To but this in perspective, this is

the first year I have started a

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Are we speaking the same language?

real garden and have found it

to be very enjoyable except

for the pesky squirrels and

birds. I now have a love/hate

relationship with these

cute, little creatures,

because of having to race

them to get to the berries

first. I must admit it was

psychologically fulfilling to watch the fruits of my labor

ripen and to know that the next day I would pick the

blackberries and eat them. The next morning, I went

to get the blackberries, but they were gone. I was very

disappointed and even a bit mad.

So, I’m driving with my nephew ranting about a

squirrel that ate my blackberry. He looked at me

incredulously and said that it was not possible. When

he realized that I was telling the truth, I saw him

reflect for a moment, and then in a very serious tone

state that I could by a new one.

When I heard this it became apparent that we may

not be talking about the same thing. I asked him what

could I buy? He told me a phone. My wife and I started

laughing, as we both realized that I had been talking

about a blackberry fruit, and my nephew had been

talking about a BlackBerry phone.

In that we were talking about two totally different

things, we both got frustrated because neither of

us could understand why the other one would not

believe the other person.

While this example is based on a misunderstanding

of the same word with two meanings, I would suggest

that the same kind of “negative” experience can

happen around other circumstances. While we ended

up laughing about this experience, there are other

misunderstandings that can become very problematic

if everyone is not speaking the “same language.”

eSocialWorker Tip: Make sure you are

speaking the same language. Try gardening,

but be prepared for those cute, little


Marquez, of eSocialWorker

LLC, can be reached at (910)


Mental Health

Mark Marquez

OutreachNCAugust 2011 OutreachNCAugust 2011 39

Life as innkeepers...

Three couples share their stories and delicious gourmet recipes

40 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Love keeps

harmony at

Knollwood House

Photos by Carrie Frye/OutreachNC

Proprietors Joe and Lyndee Radigan of Knollwood House Bed & Breakfast in Southern Pines call anyone who ever stays with them “family.”

Joe and Lyndee Radigan are

“The girls got a little tired of it,” Lyndee

in love. It’s a good thing, too, By Melanie Coughlin says of the couple’s daughters, Megan

Special to OutreachNC

since their retirement career as

and Kerry, “But I said I’ve got to make

proprietors of Knollwood House Bed and Breakfast has sure I have tried-and-true recipes.”

them spending lots of time together.

Now she has an impressive repertoire of breakfast

“Because he’s my best friend, working with him is dishes including Grand Marnier French Toast that was

just a fabulous experience,” says Lyndee, 60. “This is a featured on UNC-TV. She enjoys the challenge of

good business if you really and truly like your partner.” preparing three courses —fruit, entrée and sorbet— at

Joe, a retired health care executive who spent much each breakfast.

of his career traveling to Europe two to three weeks of “I feel like I’m having a tea party every day,” Lyndee

each month, is happy to have more time with his wife says with an ear-to-ear smile that shows her sincerity.

of 23 years.

She enjoys using different China patterns and linens

“We haven’t been able to spend that much time every day and is always on the hunt for new serving

together in a while,” Joe, 57, says. “Working with her pieces that will titivate the table. Her guests notice. One

has been a lot of fun. Plus we complement each other guest wrote on TripAdvisor that Lyndee’s breakfasts

very well.”

“not only taste wonderful, they are a work of art in

The couple has established a good division of appearance.”

responsibilities since taking ownership of the Southern “Breakfast is sort of a lost art,” Joe says with pride in

Pines property in 2007. Lyndee handles food and his wife. “Lyndee makes it really special.”

housekeeping, and Joe manages the marketing and Joe does his part to give the guests a memorable stay

concierge aspect of the business.

by catering to their needs. He stays on top of what is

Joe gets the day started at Knollwood House. After happening in the community and keeps in close contact

rising at 6 a.m., he walks to work, a mere 22 steps with area restaurants and golf resorts. He is also

down the back stairway, a fact he enjoys telling available to meet any impromptu requests.

people. Over the next hour and 15 minutes, he feeds “He is like Pavlov’s dog. He hears the (door) chime

the couples’ cats and dogs, walks the dogs, turns the and he jumps up and runs to the door to see what he

horses out to pasture, puts coffee out for guests and can do for them,” Lyndee says of Joe’s service. “Joe will

showers. Then he –and this is real love– takes coffee do anything for anyone at any time.”

up to his wife in bed.

Lyndee calls Joe’s desire to serve guests his greatest

Lyndee begins cooking breakfast at 7:30, having strength. And she has experience analyzing his

prepped all her ingredients the night before. Learning to strengths. She hired him more than two decades ago

cook breakfast was an adjustment for Lyndee.

when she was the human resources director at a health

“I never was a breakfast person. I cook really lovely care company in California. After he was hired, she

dinners from ‘Bon Appétit,’ but when we decided to do this, noticed from his resume that he was from Connecticut,

I realized I needed to learn to cook breakfast,” she says. where her parents lived. She mentioned it to him, and

To master her recipes, Lyndee served nothing but the two learned their parents lived only 20 minutes from

breakfast food to her family at dinner for an entire each other.


continued page 41

“I thought, ‘This could work,’” Lyndee says laughing

at her pragmatism in the face of a budding romance.

“I’m very much the planner.”

It was she who spurred Joe to make a career change.

He had just managed the sale of the company where

he was CEO, the same company that was taking him

out of the country so often.

“I said, ‘I don’t want to do this anymore. Let’s do

something fun,’” Lyndee recalls.

Shortly after, the two visited North Carolina to look

at colleges with their daughter Megan. They stayed

at Knollwood House Bed and Breakfast and learned

the owners were about to retire. It was the perfect

location to be near Megan, who had decided on St.

Andrews Presbyterian College in Laurinburg. Plus, the

Radigans loved the house.

Built in the 1920s and converted into a bed and

breakfast in 1990, Knollwood is a secluded spot on the

15th fairway at Mid Pines, a Donald Ross golf course.

Four years in, they are still thrilled with their decision.

“It’s a really good option for people who aren’t

necessarily looking to make a lot of money but to

have a great lifestyle,” Joe says of running a bed and

breakfast. “It’s a great way to be in a location you want

to be in and interact with the community.”

“It was a natural transition,” Lyndee says. “And who

wouldn’t want to be in Pinehurst?”

As for spending almost every hour of the day

together, Joe has a stealthy way of smoothing out

potential conflicts with Lyndee.

“The secret is I always make sure Lyndee wins

employee of the month award,” he says with a laugh.

To book a stay at Knollwood House Bed and

Breakfast, visit or call (910)


Joe and Lyndee



guests to play

the piano at


House Bed &


Grand Marnier

French Toast

1 tsp sugar

1 tbsp orange liqueur

(recommended: Grand

Marnier) - can substitute

orange juice

2 extra-large eggs

1/2 cup milk or halfand-half

2 tsp honey

½ tsp pure vanilla


⅓ tsp grated orange


⅔ tsp kosher salt

2 slices homemade day

old bread (3/4 inch slices)

cut in half (substitute any

thick cut bread)

Unsalted butter

Vegetable oil

¼ cup (¾ ounces)

sliced blanched

almonds, toasted

Confectioners’ sugar

In a large bowl, whisk

together the eggs, milk,

honey, one teaspoon of

sugar, one tablespoon

orange liqueur, the vanilla,

orange zest, and salt.

Pour the egg mixture into

a large shallow plate and

soak the bread for four

minutes, turning once.

Heat one tablespoon

each of butter and oil in a

very large sauté pan over

medium heat. Take each

slice of bread from the egg

mixture, dip one side in

the toasted almonds, and

place in the sauté pan,

almond side down. Cook

for two to three minutes

on each side, until nicely

browned. Sprinkle with

confectioners’ sugar.

Serves two.

OutreachNCAugust 2011 41

Join us for


Lunch or

Afternoon Tea

Open Tues-Sat

8am to 5pm

21 Chinquapin Rd

Village of Pinehurst



Drug Co. Inc.

311 Teal Drive




Night: 910-875-4186

42 OutreachNCAugust 2011

B&B idea

plants couple in

A Bed of Roses

By Carrie Frye

Staff Writer

Orange stuffed French toast

brushed with melted butter,

dusted with confectioners’

sugar and topped with real maple

syrup accompanied by vanilla scented

fruit and two links of turkey sausage

is served on an ornately-patterned

china plate and set before each guest

at a regally adorned dining room

table complete with lit candlesticks.

Mango orange juice waits in glasses

as freshly brewed coffee is poured

from a silver pot into fine china cups.

It might be a sweet morning dream,

but then a cheerful hostess describes

the gourmet meal, so that breakfast in

all its glory and morning conversation

can commence.

“Breakfasts are my favorite thing. I

never dreamed I would get to stay home and cook and

bake every day,” declares Emily McIntosh of A Bed of

Roses Bed and Breakfast in Asheville.

Emily, 59, shares the inn keeping duties with her

husband of 24 years, Bill, 62. The duo performs this

elaborate and tasty breakfast production every morning

that the rooms of their Queen Anne Victorian home

welcome overnight guests. Having purchased the house

at 135 Cumberland Avenue a year ago, the couple is

completing a plan that was years in the making out of

a love for antique houses and historic preservation that

began in Boston.

“We planned a career change and researched B&Bs

for 10 years,” says Emily, a former medical illustrator.

“We always liked entertaining and loved to cook. We

Photos by Carrie Frye/OutreachNC

Bill and Emily McIntosh purchased A Bed of Roses Bed and Breakfast in Asheville a year

ago and have dedicated themselves to their new roles as innkeepers. Their newest guest

package, the Montford Park Players VIP Package, offers a unique theatre experience with

reserved seating and a walk-on role in a scene of the latest Shakespeare production. For

more information, visit or call (828) 258-8700 or (888) 290-2770.

even took a two-day B&B seminar. We took yearly trips

to B&Bs in Colorado, Oregon, Virginia, North Carolina…

Visiting them all was the fun part. Then, this place

became available in Asheville.”

“We listed our house in Boston, and it sold in a matter

of hours, so we kind of knew we had to make a decision,”

adds Bill, a former biomedical photographer.

They planned one last trip to visit inns in Georgia and

North Carolina. They immediately fell in love with the

architecture of the 1897 Victorian in Asheville and close

proximity to Emily’s family. So the couple decided to

plant new roots in Asheville at A Bed of Roses.

“Everything just seemed right. It was just a matter

finding the right place at the right time,” says Bill.

“As soon as we came to Asheville, we felt at home,”

says Emily with a wide smile. continued page 43

OutreachNCAugust 2011 43

Although Bill and Emily do not have children of their

own, they have two beautiful, 9-year old cats, Nadia

and Sasha, who are the official greeters of the B&B. A

Bed of Roses offers five guest rooms, all endowed with

antiques and stately furniture like a French Louis XV bed,

clawfoot soaking tub or turn-of-the-century armoires

alongside the modern day amenities of a whirlpool tub,

lush linens, cozy robes and flat-screen televisions.

The husband and wife team developed a new web site

for A Bed of Roses ( and use it

along with TripAdvisor and their membership with the

Asheville Bed and Breakfast Association to help market

the inn and entice travelers to visit western N.C.

“When we first started this, I was afraid I would become

cynical about people, but it has been just the opposite.

The more I do this, the more I like people. Our guests are

fantastic, and we have met so many people,” says Emily,

who makes every effort to cater to any special needs or

requests of guests.

“There are just so many great personalities,” adds Bill.

Pleasing guests and providing the full B&B experience

is at the top of Bill and Emily’s ‘to do’ list. Mornings start

early and find both Bill and Emily in the kitchen by 7

a.m. preparing a two-course breakfast side by side and

serving it to their guests at 9 a.m. The small window

of time between the 11 a.m. checkout and the 3 p.m.

check-in is filled with clean up, menu setting, shopping

and gardening.

“I didn’t realize how much time gets taken up. There’s

also the baking,” Emily says of the freshly baked cookies

that are a staple and a sweet reward for visitors to the

kitchen. “We are never bored,” she says laughing.

“That’s the only thing I promised Emily,” adds Bill

smiling, “was that we would never be bored.”

With a sparkle in her eyes, Emily grins and says, ” They

say growing old isn’t for sissies; neither is running a B&B.

It is an amazing experience.”

Leave the landscaping to us...


· Commercial · Residential

· Landscaping · Lot Blowing

Tater Baker, Owner



Emily McIntosh prepares

chocolate chip cookies for

guests and also shares her

French toast recipe below.


French Toast

1-2 long loaves of

French Bread, sliced

at a diagonal

½ to 1 package

of cream cheese,


4 large eggs

½ cup milk

Orange zest to taste

Orange marmalade (our favorite is Mackays, imported

from Scotland and made with champagne)

Melted butter for brushing

Confectioners’ sugar for dusting

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray two 11”x17” metal

baking pans with cooking spray. Using two adjacent

pieces of bread per person, lay each pair open like a

book. Spread one piece with softened cream cheese.

Spread the opposite piece with orange marmalade.

Press the two pieces together firmly but gently enough

that the filling doesn’t ooze out. Repeat for eight

“sandwiches.” Whisk together the eggs, milk and orange

zest. Dip each “sandwich” in the egg mixture, turning

to coat. Place in prepared pan so they don’t touch one

another. Brush with melted butter. Bake at 350 degrees

for 20 minutes. Dust with confectioners’ sugar and serve

with real maple syrup.


Belinda Bryant, Vallie Goins,

Kate Tuomala, and Ruth Jones

PHONE (910) 692-6422

1902-K N. Sandhills Blvd., Hwy. #1 • Longleaf Medical Center • Aberdeen NC 28315

44 OutreachNCAugust 2011

No mystery to

Rosemary House’s success

Karen Pullen, 67, writes mysteries, teaches

memoir writing and operates Rosemary House

Bed and Breakfast in Pittsboro. And this is her

retirement career from engineering.

“I had a corporate job, and I had a really good income,”

says Karen. “But I was tired and didn’t want to do it just

for the money anymore.”

Pullen and her husband Mac opened Rosemary

House in 2000. The couple found Pittsboro particularly

charming during visits to see their daughter at the

University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.

“Pittsboro is just such a nice little friendly town but

still close enough to Chapel Hill, Raleigh and Durham,”

Karen says.

Karen had always thought of operating a bed and

breakfast but had another reason for choosing it as a

new career.

“I love old houses. I love the way they’re laid out, the

woodwork, the floors,” she says. “But there’s no

logical reason to buy a big old house. Saying

you’re going to have a B&B gives you an excuse

to have one.”

She and Mac bought the 1912 Colonial Revival

home and spent seven months doing upgrades

before opening to guests. Mac worked the whole

summer on repairing the double-hung windows

that were broken or painted shut. The couple

added bathrooms and used, by Karen’s estimation,

about 100 gallons of paint. The refurbished inn

has five rooms, among them the popular Retreat

Room featuring a fireplace and a two-person

therapeutic tub. The Pullens named their bed and

By Melanie Coughlin

Special to OutreachNC

breakfast for the herb of friendship and remembrance.

The name is working; a recurring theme among guests

comments is how memorable the stay was.

A feature that distinguishes Rosemary House from

its peers is its all-vegetarian breakfasts. The dishes –

ranging from sweet potato pancakes to eggs benedict

with asparagus and even vegetarian meats– satisfy

both meat and veggie lovers.

“I try to make a breakfast that is different from

something someone would make at home,” Karen says.

The upsides of owning a bed and breakfast outweigh

the downsides. Karen has been amazed by the people

she has met. Of thousands of guests, there have been

only two or three she says were difficult.

“That’s an incredible number of nice people to meet,”

she says. “They’re perfect strangers. You don’t know

anything about them besides a name and credit card

number, and I’m always struck by how really, really nice

people are.”

Karen cites only one disadvantage to her chosen


“With a B&B, you don’t make a lot of money. It’s a

lifestyle choice,” she says.

She says an inn with five rooms or more is ideal for

getting enough bookings to provide a livable income. As

in real estate, choosing the site for a bed and breakfast

is “all location, location, location,” Karen says, because

the destination must be appealing for guests. She

advises people considering running a bed and breakfast

that it is helpful to have a part-time job. Mac is a high

school math teacher. Karen would not trade her inn for

her old job as an engineer. continued page 45

“I like having my own business after spending 20

years in the corporate world. Even though my income is

greatly reduced, I enjoy having that control,” she says.

Today, the couple lives offsite, and an employee lives

in an onsite apartment, freeing time for the couple to

both live their dream and pursue other interests.

Karen received her master’s of fine arts in popular

fiction in 2008. She helped launch the creative writing

program at Central Carolina Community College, where

she also teaches. She has written two mystery novels,

and she is one of the contributors to the book “Fish

Tales: The Guppy Anthology,” a collection of 22 short

stories. Karen will be reading her mystery story at

McIntyre’s Books in Fearrington Village, Pittsboro,

on Aug. 19. She took second place in a “Spinetingler

Magazine” contest for a story that chillingly hits at the

½ stick unsalted butter, melted

¼ cup light brown sugar, firmly packed

2 tbsp crystallized ginger, finely

chopped plus additional for garnish

2 tbsp currants or raisins

2 large Anjou pears, peeled, cored

and sliced thin

1 tbsp fresh lemon juice

½ cup all-purpose flour

½ tsp double-acting baking powder

¼ tsp salt

½ tsp cinnamon

OutreachNCAugust 2011 45

hearts of mothers. Though Rosemary House does not

have any ghosts to inspire Karen’s writing, she admits

guests are sometimes the

muses for characters in

her stories.

All Karen’s pursuits

create a busy life.

“I like to have a lot of

things going on. I wouldn’t

call this retirement,” Karen

says with a laugh.

To learn more about

Rosemary House, visit

or call (919) 542-5515 or

(888) 643-2017.

Pear Ginger Upside-Down Cake

2 large eggs

¼ cup plus 2 tbsp granulated sugar

½ tsp vanilla

Whipped cream or vanilla ice cream

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Into

an eight-inch round cake pan, pour the

butter, swirling the pan, and sprinkle it

with brown sugar, two tablespoons of

ginger and currants. In a small bowl, toss

the pear slices with the lemon juice and

arrange them evenly over the currants.

Into another small bowl, sift together the

flour, baking powder, salt and cinnamon.

In a bowl with an electric mixer, beat the

eggs with the granulated sugar and the

vanilla for three to five minutes, or until

the mixture is thick and pale and forms a

ribbon when the beaters are lifted. Fold

in the flour mixture gently but thoroughly,

pour the batter over the pear slices, and

bake the cake for 20 to 25 minutes, or

until a tester comes out clean. Run a

sharp knife around the edge of the pan,

invert the cake onto a serving plate, and

serve it warm with the whipped cream

or ice cream, and then sprinkle with the

remaining chopped crystallized ginger.

Photos by Mollie Tobias

Serving tea to guests is just one of the many

job perks for Karen Pullen, owner of Rosemary

House Bed and Breakfast in Pittsboro.


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and personal care

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assistance with bathing,

ambulation and

incontinence issues.

Meal preparation

Light housekeeping

Transportation Services


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46 OutreachNCAugust 2011

The Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) is a

partnership between the Federal Bureau of

Investigation, the National White Collar Crime

Center, and the Bureau of Justice Assistance. IC3

receives in excess of 300,000 complaints a year about

fraudulent activity. IC3 reported that 2.5 percent (7,500)

of these complaints originate from N.C. residents. Ask

these seven simple questions before buying online.

Have you ever heard of the business you are

1 dealing with? If not, try doing a search online. If

you can’t find any customer reviews of the business,

a company web site, official business filings or Better

Business Bureau reviews, it might be a scam.

Are you being offered something for free? A large

2 number of Internet scams start with a “free” offer,

but then you have to buy something else to get what

was advertised as being free. The word “free” should

always make you suspicious.

Is the price of what you are looking to buy

3 unusually low? If you feel like you are getting too

good of a deal, be careful. Most scams look too good to

be true because they are.

Are you being asked to provide personal

information by e-mail? You should never send


credit card information, passwords or social security

numbers over e-mail. Credit card information should

be entered into secure Internet billing sites. It is

Ask right questions to avoid Internet fraud

important that this internet

billing site start with “https”,

not “http”. The additional “s”

stands for secure.

5Does the company you

are considering

purchasing from accept Consumer Beware

credit cards? Almost Bob Temme

all credible businesses

accept credit cards, especially if they are based online.

6Did you log on to the web site, instead of “linking”

to it from an unsolicited email? Often, a link in an

unsolicited e-mail will bring you to a web page for a

business that looks to be legitimate, but in reality, it is

a site that was created to steal your money once you

place an order and enter your credit card information.


Where is the business located? Businesses that

have a physical location and mailing address rather

than a post office box are less likely to victimize Internet

users. Avoid dealing with businesses outside the U.S.

since both investigation and prosecution become

extremely difficult. Incidentally, the statistics published

by IC3 for 2010 indicated that the No. 1 state that had

the most identified perpetrators was California. N.C.

was No. 15 on the list with 2.1 percent.

For more information, contact the Community Services

Unit of the Southern Pines Police Dept. at (910) 692-2732.

Wake up with the

WIOZ 550 AM Morning Show

& Billy Bag-O-Donuts

from 6-9am...

OutreachNCAugust 2011 47

48 OutreachNCAugust 2011

One of my childhood loves

is “The Wizard of Oz” and

Judy Garland singing “Over

the Rainbow.” I never thought

there was anyone comparable

to the way she sang it. While

visiting with a client who loves

music, he requested I bring a

copy of Jane Monheit for him

to listen to. He told me “no one

has ever sung ‘Over the Rainbow’ so

sweetly or with such a vocal range.”

So I downloaded a CD by Jane Monheit that

contained her version of “Over the Rainbow.” I heard

the voice of an angel sing those well-known lyrics,

including words that were never used in the screen

version sung by Judy Garland.

“When all the world is a hopeless jumble and the

raindrops tumble to the ground, heaven opens a

magic lane. When all the clouds darken up the skyway.

There’s a rainbow highway to be found leading from

your window pane. To a place behind the sun. Just a

step beyond the rain...”

What an amazing intro to the famous lines,

“Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high. There’s a

land that I heard of once in a lullaby. Somewhere over

the rainbow, bluebirds fly. Birds fly over the rainbow,

why, then oh why, can’t I? Someday I’ll wish upon a

star and wake up where the clouds are far behind me.

Where troubles melt like lemon drops and way above

the chimney tops, that’s where you’ll find me.”

Fortunately, I am not the only one with an indelible

memory of “The Wizard of Oz” and Judy Garland

singing, “Over the Rainbow”. Over the last few weeks,

I tested my hypothesis in a variety of settings.

With a rate of 100 percent, all encounters ended

There’s no place like home

with a mutual sing-along.

No wonder the song is

No. 1 on the “Songs of the

Century” list compiled by

the Recording Industry

Association of America

and the National

Endowment for the

Arts. The American

Film Institute also

Sentimental Journey

Jennifer George

ranked “Over the Rainbow” the greatest movie song

of all time on the list of “AFI’s 100 Years...100 Songs”.

So what was the draw that Dorothy had throughout

the movie’s storyline of wanting to go home? No matter

where life leads us, there is a desire to be home, the

metaphorical home where we are comfortable, safe,

accepted and known. Those struggling with memory

loss are constantly looking to “go home” and leave

wherever they are at to travel “home.’” Reality can

serve as a stumbling block when family members and

caregivers strive to remind them that they are home or

that they cannot leave to go back to a certain place.

Home is not a place; it is a feeling. Yes, you can go back

home again. Through stories, songs and memories, we

can remember who we are and that we are loved.

The next time I hear someone say they wish they

could go home, I will link their arm in mine, join their

journey and say, “Tell me about your home? What was it

like growing up in your family? What’s your favorite food

from childhood?” The list of questions will continue and

for a moment, I will be with them remembering, “There’s

no place like home. There’s no place like home.”

Contact Jennifer George to share music memories at

(910) 692-0683 or

Asking for help can reduce caregiver guilt

When it comes to

caregiving, emotions

linked to obligation, or a sense

of owing or giving back, may lead

to resentment, anger and guilt.

Caregiver guilt is an emotion that

conceals resentment, anger or

simply exhaustion. Taking care of

a loved one is not an easy

task, whether it is a child or

an elder.

Caring for an aging parent

may demonstrate a role reversal with the adult child

becoming parent-like to the elder which is disconcerting

to both parties. The adult child/caregiver is now in a

position to make decisions for the benefit of the elder,

which may provoke feelings of anxiety and agitation. If

there are siblings involved, resentment sets in when,

perhaps, a particular adult child is the one to make

decisions. Then the guilt sets in, leaving a sense of

obligation to care for them.

Guilt is debilitating. It is exhausting, haunting,

troublesome and profound. It can interfere with marriage

and family life. It is not an easy emotion to extinguish

despite the praise and appreciation from other family

members whose intentions are well-meaning. For some

caregivers, guilt is relentless.

Taking care of a loved one should not hinder your

needs. Just like having children, parents may feel they

need some time alone, and when this is the case, they

call in a helper for some relief. As a caregiver, you can

do the same thing. And if you feel guilty for taking time

away from your loved one, make sure you give him or

her some fun time, too. Create a balance. Your loved

one might feel resentful, if they sense you are burdened

by them.

Here a few tips to help relieve caregiver guilt:

• Don’t be a martyr. Know that you are a good person

for taking on such an enormous responsibility. Forgive

Guiding Lights

Lauren Watral, MSW

OutreachNCAugust 2011 49

yourself for being human.

• Consider relaxing or meditative outlets such as

yoga, Tai Chi, hiking or long walks.

• Look to your faith or spirituality for strength. You must

have a strong mind and body to be a good caregiver.

• Find a support group or therapist with whom to

share your feelings and experiences.

• Confide in family and close friends.

Watral, MSW, is owner of Raleigh Geriatric Care

Management and on the Board of Directors for Guiding

Lights Caregiver Support Center in Raleigh. Have a

question? E-mail or

call (919) 371-2062.

In addition to providing education

and training for college students,

we have many offerings for

senior citizens. Our Center for

Creative Retirement, Community

Enrichment and Computer classes

are very popular. Find all the

information you need at:

or call 246-4943.

50 OutreachNCAugust 2011

Spirituality & Aging

Archie Stevens

Find hope in last days of summer

The end of summer is

drawing nearer. Growing

up along the beach

in South Carolina, Labor

Day Weekend was the last

getaway to the beach for

boating and water skiing

along the Intercoastal Waterway with family and

friends. It was a carefree time before returning to the

routine of school and anticipating cooler temperatures

as the days became shorter. Take a moment and think

of those last end of summer adventures you have had.

As the season begins to change from the sweltering heat

of summer to the much anticipated cooler temperatures

of autumn, I begin to notice the changes from lush green

to reds, yellows, tans and browns taking place all around.

Many see the change of seasons as a time of hope. Hoping

that things will be better. We are reminded that things

do change as we live our daily lives, some things for the

better and some things for worse. We don’t know what

the changes of seasons will hold for us. The one thing that

makes a difference is attitude. How a person responds to

Out of town guests?

Need a place for your upcoming event?

Check out our

new rates!

1900’s Two Bedroom Cottage

Accommodations for 6

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change is what makes the difference.

Some people go through life without hope for tomorrow.

God’s word speaks of this hope as “an anchor for the soul.”

It is often that unspoken strength that allows individuals

to rise each day and face the uncertainties of life. In the

midst of our losses and let-downs, we can anchor our

souls with divine strength. The Bible is more modern than

tomorrows’ newspaper and tells us what is before us.

The scripture says that: “All things are possible with God.”

He is the hope for our tomorrows, and we need not have

any fear —no matter what comes our way. May each of

you be blessed in the coming change of seasons.

Stevens, Chaplain/Volunteer Coordinator at Liberty Hospice

Services, can be reached at



oore County Joint Nursing Home/

Adult Care Home Community Advisory

Committee will hold a Public Business

Meeting on Tuesday, Sept. 6 at 10 a.m.

at the Senior Enrichment Center, 8040 US

Hwy 15-501, West End. There will be an

informational session regarding Long-Term

Care Issues. Public welcome.

Caregiver Spotlight: Severa Gorbounov

I started doing home health

about 15 years ago in Texas.

I am a people person and

enjoy helping others. I like

working as a home health

provider, because it gives the

opportunity to meet other

people and help them with

whatever I can. Having worked

in hospitals and nursing

homes, it makes me feel good

at the end of the day to know

that I have done something to

change someone’s life, even if

only a little bit. To me, this is

all that matters.

— Severa Gorbounov,

Connected Care-Cary

OutreachNCAugust 2011 51

OutreachNC • April 2010 3

52 OutreachNCAugust 2011

4 OutreachNC • April 2010

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