Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes


Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes

Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes

qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

insideJan. 7-20, 2012Vol 26 No 1812a&e / life&style8 Naked Twister15 From farm to fork16 Tell Trinity17 Out in the Stars19 Q events calendar19 Dharma Loungepresents party11news & features6 News Notes: Regional Briefs10 Y alternatives a bonus11 New TOY director12 Local PFLAG honored13 State org opposes amendmentopinions & views4 Editor’s Note4 General Gayety5 Transilluminations9 QPollcharlotteobserver.com/1166/a local news partner ofThe Charlotte Observerconnectgoqnotes.comtwitter.com/qnotescarolinasfacebook.com/qnotescarolinasSign up for our weekly emailnewsletter at goqnotes.com/subs.contributors this issueARAContent, Matt Comer, Eva Hayward, CharleneLichtenstein, Lainey Millen, Leslie Robinson, DavidStout, Trinityfront pageGraphic Design by Lainey MillenPhoto Copyright: Jimmie Cobb, JC DigitalPhotography WorksPride Publishing & Typesetting, Inc.P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222, ph 704.531.9988 fx 704.531.1361Publisher: Jim YarbroughSales: x207 adsales@goqnotes.comNat’l Sales: Rivendell Media, 212.242.6863Editor: Matt Comer, x202 editor@goqnotes.comAssoc. Ed.: David Stout, editor2@goqnotes.comProduction: Lainey Millen, x205 production@goqnotes.comPrinted on recycled paper.Material in qnotes is copyrighted by Pride Publishing & Typesetting © 2012 and may not be reproduced in any manner withoutwritten consent of the editor or publisher. Advertisers assume full responsibility — and therefore, all liability — for securingreprint permission for copyrighted text, photographs and illustrations or trademarks published in their ads. The sexual orientationof advertisers, photographers, writers, cartoonists we publish is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of namesor photographs does not indicate the subject’s sexual orientation. qnotes nor its publisher assumes liability for typographicalerror or omission, beyond offering to run a correction. Official editorial positions are expressed in staff editorials and editorialnotations and are determined by editorial staff. The opinions of contributing writers and guest columnists do not necessarilyrepresent the opinions of qnotes or its staff. qnotes accepts unsolicited editorial, but cannot take responsibility for its return.Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity.Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes

VIEWSThree… two… one… Happy NewYear! Yes, it’s time for well wishes, resolutionsand new beginnings. I do it. You do it.We all partake in the annual wish-makingand dreaming that is New Year. With a newcalendar comes hopes for change, progressand success. And, as much as we each wishbetter for ourselves, here’s to new hopes thatour community and world experiences betterdays as well.2011 was a rocky year. Bad news seemedconstant. The economy was and remainsin shambles. Politicians and civic leadersseem deadlocked in constant disagreement.Dysfunction abounds. Despite it all, ourcommunity saw its fair share of successeslast year — accomplishments I hope we canbuild on for bigger and brighter goals in 2012,a year that will prove historic for Charlotteand North Carolina.Our city’s and state’s LGBT communitieseditor’s noteby matt comermatt@goqnotes.comA New Year for change and growthwill be handed a once-in-a-lifetime opportunityto shine on a national and world stage thisyear — the highlights, of course, being the impendinganti-LGBT constitutional amendmentvote in May and this September’s DemocraticNational Convention in Charlotte.In the next few months, the campaign todefeat the proposed amendment — whichwould forever ban recognition of samesexmarriages, civil unions and domesticpartnerships — will heat up. Both sides willbegin fundraising ferociously (if they haven’talready) and TV ads, radio spots, billboards,yard signs and mailers will soon become ascommonplace as the Carolina pine trees thatstand tall in nearly every single backyard inthis state.The amendment will be an uphill fight.Thirty states across the country have passedsimilar constitutional measures, thoughNorth Carolina’s is one of the most draconian.Fortunately, Tar Heels have a long, progressivetradition and history to draw upon, givingus a firm foundation for building coalitions andworking toward the defeat of the amendment.And, regardless of the amendment’s eventualfate, the organizing and grassroots work undertakenwill leave an indelible mark on LGBTcommunities in every single city and town, nomatter their size.This fall, LGBT community members inCharlotte — and even those across thestate — will have the opportunity to engagein a conversation that could prove usefulfor creating more progressive and inclusivemovement at the local level. Thousandsand thousands of LGBT and LGBT-friendlypoliticians, activists, lobbyists, DemocraticParty workers and media representativeswill pour into the Queen City for the 2012Democratic National Convention and becomeour captive audience.For the week the convention is here, andfor the several weeks preceding it, localLGBT community leaders and members willmeet and mingle with some of the nation’smost influential LGBT leaders and visionaries.Such access, I hope, will serve as aboon to efforts to increase our visibilityand credibility as an active, politically andsocially dynamic constituency.I sincerely hope my fellow communityleaders will take this opportunity and use itfor its maximum potential benefit. A wastedopportunity such as this would be quite sad,indeed. I envision speaking engagements andleadership discussions and public projectsand initiatives to increase our visibility. Weall know our community is culturally vibrant— now it is our turn to become politicallydynamic and viable. We’ve been ignored forfar too long, hidden away in the Queen City’sdusty closet.Our community’s continued journey out ofCharlotte’s proverbial closet is, perhaps, mymost ardent and heartfelt wish for our localcommunity this new year. We had a glimpseof the possibilities during Pride Charlotte’sUptown 27,000-plus extravaganza in August.We are a large and powerful community— but only if we choose to be, such asrecent efforts to engage the Charlotte CityCouncil in continued conversations on anon-discrimination ordinance and domesticpartner benefits.Pride Charlotte’s 2011 theme — “StandUp. Stand Out. Stand Proud” — was perfectlysymbolic and it’s a message we should take toheart as this new year unfolds and we beginto face the amendment’s challenges andDemocratic Convention’s many blessings. : :VIEWSI’ve taken the liberty of composing NewYear’s resolutions for individuals who are justtoo busy to do it themselves.Newt Gingrich:1. Lose weight.2. Win the Republican nomination.3. Win the presidential election.4. Gloat.Mitt Romney:1. Win the Republican nomination.2. Win the presidential election.3. Sentence Newt Gingrich to Devil’s Island.Herman Cain:1. Land a gig on Fox.2. See a marriage counselor with Gloria.3. Find a new piece of chicken on the side.Rick Santorum:1. Lose the Republican nomination.2. Sulk.Michele Bachmann:general gayetyby leslie robinsonqnotes contributorHelping out on the resolution front1. Win the Republican nomination.2. If that fails, angle for the vice-presidentialnomination.3. Confront Marcus once and for all.4. Introduce legislation removing all gaypeople to Key West — at least Marcus willbe warm.Marcus Bachmann:1. Reconcile my faith, my orientation and mychoices.2. Not.Rick Perry:1. Burn the jacket I wore in the antigay video.2. Remain firmly ignorant about everything.Ron Paul:1. Lose the Republican nomination.2. Declare Houston a new libertarian nation.3. Deny foreign aid to Dallas.Jon Huntsman:1. Come from behind, way behind, and win theRepublican nomination.2. Failing that, accept a cabinet post — in theObama administration.Fred Karger:1. Be denied entry to the Republican NationalConvention.2. Lose the Republican nomination.3. Start planning for 2016.Sarah Palin:1. Get Todd his own reality show on snowmobileracing.2. Win the Arizona Senate seat.3. See Russia from Scottsdale.Donald Trump:1. Convince the world I’m the most importantperson in it.Barack Obama:1. Recapture the White House.2. Work on my place in history.3. Resume smoking, no matter what Michellesays.Michelle Obama:1. Campaign like crazy.2. Urge America to support Iraq veterans.3. Rotate my crops.Bo Obama:1. Locate an irreplaceable White Houseantique and eat it.John Boehner:1. Do my part to get a Republican in the WhiteHouse.2. Perfect my tan so Sports Illustrated has toask me to model in the swimsuit issue.Barney Frank:1. Serve effectively in Congress until my finalterm in finished.2. Try not to laugh when people suggest I leadthe HRC.Tammy Baldwin:1. Win Wisconsin’s tough Senate race.2. Publicly downplay that I’m the first openlygay U.S. Senator.3. Privately tingle all over.Angela Merkel:1. Save the European Union.2. Vacation anywhere but Greece.Pope Benedict XVI:1. Continue leading the Church backwards.2. Convince God I’m too valuable to becalled home.Grethe Cammermeyer:1. Make sure certain persons know I’m availableto serve on the Joint Chiefs.Steve Jobs:1. Reveal to the world that my consciousnessnow resides in Apple’s latest product, thesee General Gayety on 9SUBSCRIBE!These rates only cover a portion of our true cost,however, our goal is to serve our communityMailed 1st class from Charlotte, NC, in sealed envelope.Subscription Rates: ☐ 1 yr - 26 issues = $48 ☐ 1/2 yr - 13 issues = $34Mail to: P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222______________________________________________________name: ______________________________________________________address: ______________________________________________________city: ______________________________________________________state: zip:credit ______________________________________________________card – check one: ☐ mastercard ☐ visa ☐ discover ☐ american expresscard ______________________________________________________#:exp. date:signature: qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

VIEWStransilluminationsby eva haywardqnotes contributorTransgenderism and transsexualismare expressions of life-loving inventionA love affair broke out between a transsexualwoman — male to female — and atransgender man — female to male.I have lived as a woman for years and hehad recently transitioned from female to male.I define as transsexual — someone who feelsan essential need to modify her body — andhe is transgender — not necessarily wantingsex reassignment. I always desired menand he always women. While sex and genderidentity do not define one’s sexuality, wemoved across cultural categories of gay andlesbian, man and woman. Neither of us waslooking for a transgender lover, but we foundeach other and became a different kind ofheterosexual couple.Although relationships can be complicated,love is often quite simple. In many ways,our relationship is no more or less convolutedthan any other: Do you desire me as much asI desire you? Has this relationship changedme, or not? And, in other ways, the couplingfeels novel.Transgenderism and transsexualism areexpressions of life-loving invention. Simply,transgender people, like all people, are part oflife’s exuberance, the planet’s investment inchange and potential. Even a casual readingof Charles Darwin reminds that organismsflourish because of their ability to transformor adjust, not because of their capacities forstrength or intelligence. And, a more carefulreading of Darwin invites us to see hownon-reproductive members of a species arenot detriments, but advantages. So, might it betrue that variation in sex, sexuality and genderis indeed “natural”?What makes this male-to-female andfemale-to-male couple fresh is that bodiesshift across seemingly inherent culturalcodes. Rather than suggesting the apocalypseof society (although I confess that on someMonday mornings I long for nothing else),this couple expresses elasticity in identitiesthat most Americans assume are true andenduring. Bodies are potentials rather thanabsolutes. The interest in Chaz Bono, ThomasBeattie (“the pregnant man”), “America’sNext Top Model” candidate and transwomanIsis King and author Jennifer Finney Boylandemonstrates this as a cultural truth. If youneed more proof, watch the Oprah WinfreyNetwork for a few hours.Transpeople define themselves innumerous ways. There is probably no singleterm that adequately conveys this diversity.Self-identifying language in the trans communityis rapidly changing. What worked acouple of years ago — for example, “tranny”— is suddenly wrong or misrepresentative.“Tranny” is now viewed as offensive, a slur.These changing definitions are not arbitrary,but indicate a people finding their voice in alarger context.It’s common to read about why peopletransition genders — it seems some researcheris always searching for somebiological code or psychological event thattriggered it — but, the question is oftenirrelevant. How do any of us know how webecame gendered? Or, why we desire aparticular gender or sex? Perhaps too muchmisguided time and money is spent on defininga genetic code or a traumatic experiencethat will account for all the ways transgenderpeople become transgender.The real question is why we pose thesequestions. Are they meant to secure betterhealth care or to foster social justice for apolitically-disenfranchised population? Or,are their purposes less altruistic? Behavioristpsychologist John Money studied why transsexualsfeel an innate need to change theirsex and concluded that such feelings areindicators of mental illness. Consequently,the American Psychiatric Association listed“Gender Identity Disorder” in the 1994 revisionof the diagnostic manual, which has sinceimpacted the lives of transsexual and transgenderpeople.Usually transgender people are writtenabout. Their stories are interpreted by sometimessympathetic writers, but more oftenthan not by insensitive journalists, interviewers,academics or health care providers. Thisisn’t to dismiss our political allies; they arecrucial for solidarity projects and culturalchange. But, even allies should give voiceback to a community that has for too longbeen named, defined and pathologized.Even the inclusion of “T” in LGBTQ(Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender,Queer) pays only lip service and lesbianand gay organizations ignore issues thatare unique to transpeople. The EmploymentNon-Discrimination Act (ENDA) introducedin Congress would prohibit discriminationagainst employees on the basis of theirsexual orientation. In 2007, The Human RightsCampaign Fund, one of the largest lobbyistsfor the lesbian and gay community, refused toextend ENDA’s protections to include genderidentity: transgender and transsexual.A lot of education is needed, even inlocal news reporting. Sam Peterson, a localartist and activist who organized ChestFestat The ArtsCenter in Carrboro, described anencounter with a local person who “lookedlike a man.” The interviewer told Sam thathe didn’t look like a man to him. The irony ofcourse is that all men try to look like men,but without the assumption that they are notactually men.In general, news stories constantly referto transpeople using the wrong pronouns— “A man dressed in women’s clothing wasfound murdered,” read a Baltimore newsarticle, or “She tricked this other woman intothinking she was a man,” a British publicationreported. But, it is not just disrespectfulmisrecognition that is the problem, but theway transpeople are either criminalized orrepresented as deserving victims of violence.Far from resembling the character BuffaloBill in “The Silence of the Lambs” or NormanBates in “Psycho,” transgender women asa group risk being assaulted and killed at amuch higher rate because of who they are. TheTransgender Law Center conservatively estimatesthat one in every 900 homicides in theU.S. is an anti-transgender hate-based crime.As for claims of deceit, there is nothingabout having sex with someone that requiresdisclosure about one’s trans status. Don’t we allsee Transilluminations on 9Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes

BRIEFSnews notes:from the carolinas, nation and worldcompiled by Lainey Millen :: lainey@goqnotes.com | David Stout :: david@goqnotes.com | Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.comCarry the torch!CHARLOTTE — Unity Fellowship Church Charlotte has initiated a fundraising effort to allow them to provide more for its congregational ministry.The Lighthouse Project enables the church’s efforts to renovate its facility, as well as construct a new multi-purpose building to reach intothe community through athletics, conference and office space. Evenmore, it will provide more opportunities for local and national collaborations.Contributions may be made in the following categories: $100, stoneblock; $250, eco-friendly rainwater basin; $500, youth and communitygym; and $1,000, elevator for the “differently-abled.” Recognition willbe made through the church’s Torchbearer Wall in the new facility.Send contributions made payable to UFCC, earmarked forLighthouse Project, to Unity Fellowship Church Charlotte, P.O. Box37131, Charlotte, NC 28237.For more information, ufccharloattenc.org.— L.M.CharlotteFilm to benefit national organizationCHARLOTTE — “Legalize Gay!” will beshown on Feb. 9 and 11 as a benefit to supportCampus Pride.The film is a documentary that capturesthe courage and conviction of a new generationof activists — gay and straight — as theycampaign, often in parts of the country hostileto gay and lesbian rights, for LGBT equalityin marriage, non-discrimination in sports andat work, standing up to bullying and forginginclusive college campuses. “Legalize Gay”follows LGBT and ally young activists as theyput their words into action.Screenings will be held at Petra’s PianoBar, 1919 Commonwealth Ave., on Feb. 9 witha reception at 7 p.m., and film presentationfollowing at 7:30 p.m. and at The LGBT Centerof Charlotte, 820 Hamilton St., on Feb. 11 witha reception at 2 p.m., followed by the filmpresentation at 2:30 p.m.The event is free. However, contributionsin any amount will be accepted to benefit localscholarships for LGBT and ally youth whowish to attend Camp Pride from July 17-22 inNashville, Tenn.The film will air on Logo later in the year.For more information, visit campuspride.org/camppride/.— L.M.Chorus unveils giving programCHARLOTTE — One Voice Chorus ended2011 with a call for contributions to supportits work.Since the economy may make it difficult tomake lump sum donations, a budget-minded,monthly giving program, Encore Circle, makesit simple to “keep the music and mission ofthe chorus thriving throughout the year.”For those who make a pledge of $30 ormore each month, One Voice will send twofree tickets to their April 13 “Dreamscapes”concert at Club Marigny, 1440 S. Tryon St.The chorus is extending an invitation tothe community for those enjoy singing to jointhem. Rehearsals begin Jan. 17 at UnitarianUniversalist Church of Charlotte, 234 N.Sharon Amity Rd., from 7-9:30 p.m.For more information or to make a contribution,visit onevoicechorus.com.— L.M. qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012EasternIt’s movie night!GREENVILLE — The Greenville AreaClassic GLBT Film Night will be held onthe third Friday of each month at 7 p.m. atthe Unitarian Universalist Congregation ofGreenville, 131 Oakmont Dr.Features for the first quarter are: Jan. 20,drag comedy; Feb. 17, lesbian love stories;and March 16, documentary shorts (marriageequality theme).The screenings are preceded by a refreshmentand social gathering at 7 p.m., withthe movie beginning at 7:30 p.m.Admission is free. Refreshment sales helpto fund local LGBT organizations.For more information, email richerichnc@gmail.com or visit facebook.com/glbtmovienight/.— L.M.WesternMountain group formsBAKERSVILLE — The Mitchell County GayStraight Alliance had its first public meetingon Nov. 15 at the county library amidstprotest. Since then it has been the focal pointfor working “toward ensuring equal rightsand justice for lesbian gay bisexual andtransgender (LGBT) people” in this mountaincommunity.Formed by Allison Bovée and Amy Waller,its inaugural meeting met with resistance, accordingto The Mountain Xpress. The organizerswrote in an opinion piece in the Ashevilleweekly that there were religious, homophobicprotesters who threatened the meeting.YouTube videographer “lifeinmitchellcounty” posted a short documentary atyoutube.com/watch?v=YfUf56lTcKI. He interviewedseveral protesters and got commentsfrom them. One person said that he did notlike gays.The group was formed outside the normalschool environment. They told the XPress thatthey formed the alliance to be the voice ofgay and straight people who wished to worktogether for equal rights and justice for gaysin Mitchell County. They hope to make thecounty more welcoming.Support for the group has landed thempositive comments on their Facebook page.Ted Allen, a noted food critic and former castmate from “Queer Eye on the Straight Guy,”said “Thanks for doing what you’re doing!xoxo.” Equality North Carolina Board ChairDan Gurley has offered to come speak at anevent. He is a native of the county. Othersfrom as far away as San Francisco andCanada tipped their hat to the group as well,saying that they had read a recent post onAndy Towle’s towleroad.com and wanted tocongratulate them.At their Dec. 12 meeting in Spruce Pine,the group netted 30 attendees.They encourage their members to becomeactive in the anti-gay constitutional amendmentbattle, as well as expanding awarenessand visibility in the county.For more information, emailMitchellCountyGSA @gmail.com.— L.M.Legendary activist at ASUBOONE — “An Evening with AngelaDavis” will be presented on Jan. 24, 2012,at 7 p.m. at Appalachian State University’sFarthing Auditorium.She is being broughtin for the school’s26th annual Dr.Martin Luther KingJr. Commemoration.A renownedpolitical activistand scholar, Davis(pictured, creditWikipedia) has authoredeight books.She has lecturedthroughout the U.S.,as well as in Europe,Africa, Asia, Australia and South America.The university public relations office saidthat in recent years, a persistent theme ofDavis’ work has been the range of socialproblems associated with incarcerationand the generalized criminalization of thosecommunities that are most affected bypoverty and racial discrimination. Throughher activism and her scholarship during thelast decades, Davis has been involved in thenation’s quest for social justice. Her work asan educator — both at the university leveland in the larger public sphere — emphasizesthe importance of building communities ofstruggle for economic, racial and genderequality.The Diversity Lecture Series is co-sponsoredby the school’s Office of MulticulturalStudent Development, Department ofGovernment and Justice Studies, Women’sStudies Program, Office of Equity Diversityand Compliance, and Arts and Cultural Affairs.This event is free and open to the public.For more information, call Augusto Peña at828-262-6252 or email penaae@appstate.edu.— L.M.RegionalInternships opportunity announcedWASHINGTON, D.C. — Have a hankeringto spend time on Capitol Hill? Are you acollege student who wants to gain valuableskills, insight and perspective by working without elected officials? Then apply for a spot atthe intensive summer Gay & Lesbian VictoryInstitute’s Congressional Internship program.The program brings at least five outstandingLGBTQ college students to Washington,D.C., for an intensive semester-long leadershipprogram, including an eight-weekCongressional internship and a structuredcurriculum to learn about the legislativeprocess and careers in the policy-makingprocess. The Victory Institute intern will helpcoordinate logistical aspects of this program.A byproduct of participation is obtaining developmentas a future out public leader. Theywill work with members of the LGBT EqualityCaucus and be involved with a communityservice project.Qualifications include a demonstrationof strong written and oral communicationskills, attention to detail, creative thinkingand independent project management, aswell as a solid grasp of Microsoft Word,Excel and Outlook.The internship requires a creative thinkerwho enjoys the challenge of organizinginformation in a concise and understandablemanner and can find solutions to problemsas they arise in the course of maintaining asystem of gathering and organizing data.Housing accommodations in downtownand a stipend of $1,000 will be made availableto cover other living expenses. Airfareto and from the capital at the beginning andend of the program will be provided and more.Academic credit may be obtained, dependingupon each participant’s college or university.Deadline for application is Feb. 6.To apply or for more information, email acurrent resume and cover letter to careers@victoryinstitute.org, or visit victoryinstitute.org/vci_application to make online application.— L.M.National/GlobalArchbishop’s KKK remark condemnedCHICAGO, Ill. — Chicago ArchbishopCardinal Francis George ignited a firestormwhen he compared advancing LGBT equalityto the Ku Klux Klan in a television interviewwith Fox Chicago a few days beforeChristmas. Cardinal George said: “You don’twant the gay liberation movement to morph

into something like the Ku Klux Klan, demonstratingin the streets against Catholicism.”Rev. Eric Lee, executive director of theSouthern Christian Leadership Conference,spoke strongly against Cardinal George’s remarks:“I am insulted by the comparison of theKlan to the current LGBT movement. When wedistort the history of terror for cheap politicalaims, we only inflict pain on those whose liveshave been scarred by the Klan.”— D.S.Equality pioneer Lawrence has passedHOUSTON, Texas — John GeddesLawrence (pictured), a co-defendant inLawrence v. Texas, the monumental 2003 legalcase that ultimately overturned all U.S. sodomylaws, died Nov. 20 at home his partnerrevealed in late December. He was 68.In 1998,Lawrence andTyron Garner(anotherheroic man,who passedaway in 2006)were arrestedin Lawrence’s Houston home and jailedovernight after officers responding to a falsereport found the men having sex. They wereconvicted of violating a Texas state law thatbarred consensual sexual contact betweenpeople of the same sex.Lambda Legal litigated the case throughthe Texas court system and eventually tothe U.S. Supreme Court. In a stunning victory,all state sodomy laws in the countrywere found unconstitutional. The decisionestablished for the first time that gays andlesbians are entitled to fundamental libertyand privacy rights under the Constitution.Courts nationwide have cited Lawrence v.Texas more than 600 times to date, and thisdecision continues to shape the evolution ofLGBT civil rights law.— D.S.CDC guidelines increase gay donorsATLANTA, Ga. — The U.S. Centers forDisease Control is updating guidelines fororgan donation established in 1994 that willminimize the risk of transmission of HIV andviral hepatitis while maximizing the supplyof organs available for transplantation frommedically qualified donors. The current rulesdisqualify potential male donors who havehad sex with a man within five years. Underthe new policy the “look-back period” will beshortened to 12 months.HIV health experts lauded the change butsaid it is still longer than medically necessarybecause current tests can detect HIV infectionsthat occurred more than six months priorto donation.— D.S.National summit on LGBT elder housingWASHINGTON, D.C. — On Dec. 7, theNational Center for Lesbian Rights co-hosteda day-long summit on LGBT elder housingissues with the Department of Housingand Urban Development (HUD) and theDepartment of Health and Human Services(HHS). This was the first-ever national eventto address housing, health and long-term careissues for LGBT elders. More than 90 peopleregistered for the event, and the list of attendeesincluded three U.S. assistant secretaries.The invite-only event brought together activists,academics, and government officials todiscuss a broad range of issues affecting LGBTelders in housing, including discrimination inlong-term care facilities, the economic impacton LGBT elder housing models, and how toensure LGBT elder housing efforts are inclusiveof transgender elders and elders of color.HUD and HHS will use the information gatheredto work with NCLR and other groups todevelop new initiatives that will improve LGBTelders’ access to housing and health care.— D.S.HIV+ man alleges outrageous biasDETROIT, Mich. — Lawyers for JamesWhite, a 26-year-old recently diagnosed withHIV, have called his case the worst exampleof alleged HIV-related job discrimination theyhave ever handled. According to White, whowas an office assistant at Great ExpressionsDental Center (part of a national chain), his superiorsleaked news of his HIV-positive statusto fellow coworkers, several of whom beganspraying White with Lysol, prohibiting him fromtouching doorknobs, and wiping down officefurniture and equipment after he used it. Finally,during a stint in the hospital to seek care for hisHIV, Great Expressions allegedly called Whiteand told him not to return to work.The Detroit chapter of the EqualEmployment Opportunity Commission has alreadydetermined that there was “reasonablecause” to believe White was discriminatedagainst because of his HIV-status. However,at press time Great Expressions has continuedto ignore the ruling made by the EEOC.— D.S.U.N. guidelines will aid refugeesGENEVA, Switzerland — Last month,the U.N. Office of the High Commissioner forHuman Rights issued a first-ever report documentinghuman rights violations against LGBTand intersex individuals around the world. Thereport made special mention of vulnerableLGBTI refugees and asylum seekers.As part of the document, the Office of theHigh Commissioner:• Urges governments to recognize persecutionbased on sexual orientation andgender identity as grounds for refugeestatus, and calls for better training for asylumadjudicators and government officialsto grasp the unique challenges faced byLGBTI refugees.• Recognizes the extreme vulnerability toviolence of LGBTI refugees both before theyflee their homelands and during the refugeestatus determination and resettlementprocess. It also calls for a more consistentapproach to safeguarding the human rightsof LGBTI refugees.• Asks governments not to return LGBTIrefugees to countries they have fled wheretheir freedom will be threatened because oftheir sexual orientation or gender identity.ORAM, the Organization for Refuge,Asylum & Migration, an international nongovernmentalorganization helping refugeesfleeing sexual and gender-based violence,welcomed the report.— D.S.Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes

LIFENaked Twisterqnotes writer strips down for the inside storyby David Stout :: david@goqnotes.comYoga instructor Joey Barnes enters the room where his class is set to begin in just a fewminutes. He drops his bag and opens his folded notes, making a last mental record of themovement and balance poses he has planned for this afternoon’s session.After a quick scan he puts the paper in his pocket and removes his jacket, shoes andsocks. He is left wearing a tank top and track pants. An agreeable uniform for the practice ofyoga — in most instances anyway.In a moment these items are also peeled off and Barnes is nude. He turns his attention tothe similarly unclothed assemblage of men resting cross-legged before him. I sit nervouslyamong them. Following a genial exchange of hellos and how have you beens, Charlotte’sfirst and only naked yoga class for men gets underway.I take a deep breath and try to relax. “Why in the world do people want to do this,” Iwonder silently.In no time my muscles are burning and my mind is solely focused on the practice. Theearlier awkward awareness of my own nakedness is completely wiped away. Time passesquickly and when the class is over, like most, I mill around the snack table making smalltalk.If not for the fact that we are all undressed, this could be any mixer I’ve ever been to.It occurs to me how comfortable I have become with my own naked body in such a shortperiod of time. It’s one of those wonderful “a-ha” moments.According to publicity materials, the goalof the group known as Charlotte Nude Yoga“is to provide an opportunity for male communityand holistic social interaction betweensupportive, centered individuals who enjoythe practice of yoga as well as the companyof other naked men.“We strive to provide an atmosphereof camaraderie, body-acceptance, andsensuality (not sexuality). Although sensualityis an intrinsic part of this group practice,it should be clear that this is not a sexualvenue. You will work…you will sweat…andyou will love it.”The group’s genesis can be traced to aone-off, clothed yoga class held at CharlotteYoga one evening in early October 2010.The event was a special Takeover Fridayoffering that drew a roomful of gay men anda few women. Barnes, who is gay and aninstructor at Charlotte Yoga, led the class,which I attended.I had taken a number of yoga classesprior to that one, but none with Barnes. I wasimmediately drawn in by his broad smile andopen spirit — not to mention his gay discomusic selection that eschewed sitars andtablas for Gaga, Beyonce and Rihanna.To accommodate the wide range offitness, flexibility and familiarity with yogaamong the participants, Barnes kept thepractice pretty basic that night. Still, we wereall focused and wiping sweat inside of 10 minutesand that’s usually a good sign. Afterwardthe buzz was uniformly positive.Howard, a friend of a friend, mentionedto me that he and a few other participantsbelonged to a loosely organized group ofgay and bi male nudists who were hoping toorganize a regular naked yoga class underBarnes’ direction.I’ve never been too comfortable beingnaked in front of people — a feeling broughton by any number of middle school gymclass traumas, I’m sure. Still, I was intriguedenough to give Howard my contact info.He said he would let me know if the effortled anywhere.A few weeks later, I was emailed a messagethat the first class had been scheduled.Interested parties were instructed to replyASAP because demand outstripped the availablespaces. Only those who made the cutwould be sent the location, the email noted.On Nov. 13, nine guys gathered in themeeting room of a massage studio on TyvolaRoad for the inaugural Charlotte Nude Yogaclass. I wasn’t one of them — my nerves havinggotten the better of me. I felt foolish for myreticence and vowed to attend the next one.The second class, held a couple of weekslater in a member’s finished garage, wasmy introduction to naked yoga. As I said,participating changed my self-perceptiontremendously. According to the group’s website,charlottenudeyoga.com, that’s one of theprimary goals of practicing without clothes.“[Naked] yoga provides a great wayto deepen body acceptance. Also, beingnaked can bring up many of our vulnerabilities.By facing these fears in the context ofa safe and supportive community of men, qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

we naturally become more grounded andcomfortable with ourselves.”Beyond my own interior growth, throughCharlotte Naked Yoga I have been introducedto a great group of men who represent a varietyof ethnicities, ages (must be at least 18),orientations and — for you larger men whoare no doubt wondering — body types.In fact, the website directly states, “Byno means do you have to have a perfectbody to attend our classes. Our yogaclasses are about the journey of enrichmentof our bodies and minds, not a pursuit of theperfect form.”Charlotte Nude Yoga met for 36 classesin 2011. For most of the year they rotatedbetween the massage clinic and a yoga studioin NoDa. Due to their respective sizes thenumber of men who could attend classes waslimited to 12-17 per session.In all, around 120 guys attended one ormore classes. They came from all across thegreater Charlotte area, as well as other NorthCarolina cities including Raleigh, Asheville,Transilluminationscontinued from page 5Greensboro and Winston-Salem. SouthCarolina was represented by men from RockHill, Columbia and Charleston. Out-of-stateattendees were from Vermont, Ohio andCalifornia.A resource listing at NakedYoga.Netreveals just how widespread the nudeyoga movement is, with groups meetingin more than 30 U.S. cities. Interntionally,naked yoga groups have been establishedin Canada, Mexico, England, France, Russiaand Australia.Now that a large permanent space hasbeen secured for Charlotte Nude Yoga,organizers are working to increase awarenessof the group’s existence through itswebsite, promotional flyers and word-ofmouth.Attendance is expected to growsubstantially in 2012.Interested men are encouraged to visit theCharlotte Nude Yoga website where they canregister to receive via email the monthly list ofclass dates and times. A fee of $15 is collectedat each class to cover expenses.: :risk some self-discovery when we are intimatewith another person? Is the anxiety of nontransgenderpeople that they will be trickedactually a fear that sleeping with a transgenderperson could affect their own identity?By living their lives, transpeople inviteeveryone to question his or her assumptions.The invitation is a reminder to us allthat change is what we are. We don’t sustainourselves because we are intact or perfect,but because we embody the reach and possibilityof our experiences. Our sense of selfis created out of ingenuity and necessity. Weshould not only want to live and love accordingto variation, but we must. : :— We are proud to welcome Eva Haywardas a new qnotes columnist and contributor.Her monthly column in Raleigh’s IndependentWeekly will be sydnicated to us everyother issue. This column first appeared inIndependent Weekly on June 1, 2011.GeneralGayetycontinued from page 4iMback.Kim Kardashian:1. Become a spokesperson for gay marriagerights, even if they don’t want me.Chaz Bono:1. Appear on several reality shows.2. Question reality.Tinky Winky:1. Haunt Rick Perry by being Photoshopped inwith him as often as possible.Jerry Sandusky:1. Go down fighting.2. Go down lying.Ian McKellen:1. As “The Hobbit” is edited, check to makesure I’m not being upstaged by Bofur, Bifurand Bombur.Jane Lynch:1. Write another book.2. Host more awards shows.3. Star in “Glee” and appear in other shows.4. Continue doing ads.5. Throw in a movie.6. Avoid a nervous breakdown.info:lesarobinson@gmail.com . generalgayety.comqpoll Would you everparticipate in a nude yogaor other exercise program?See the options and vote:goqnotes.com/to/qpollJan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes

NEWSY alternatives bonusfor communityStill some Ys across the state embrace diversity, inclusionby Lainey Millen :: lainey@goqnotes.com10 qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012DURHAM — qnotes reported on July 9 ina News Notes brief, “Protections top concernin merger” (goqnotes.com/11730/) andupdated on Aug. 6, “YMCA alternate recommended”(goqnotes.com/11936/) that seriousconcerns were expressed that some of theYMCAs in the area would no longer be LGBTfamilyfriendly and that alternatives had beenrecommended by community members.Discussions are on the table betweenthe Triangle YMCA and Chapel Hill-CarrboroYMCA to merger into one.Since then, more discussion has beencirculating on the subject among LGBT communitymembers.Cheri Patrick said, “I was at a gatheringof lawyers last night and one of thoseattending took the floor to pitch their firm’sinvolvement in the Durham Y’s campaign toraise funds for summer camps, etc. After shespoke, I responded with a statement summarizingtheir history towards our communityand mentioned that there was currently adiscussion going on regarding that issue andthat until they recognized all families, I wouldnot give them my $. I asked her to please notein her final report to the Y that the funds shewas able to collect were reduced due to theirpolicies toward LGBT families, which sheagreed to do.”Chantelle Fisher-Borne has made plansto meet with the Durham director, GordonSinclair, to discuss the matter more thoroughly.Her reaction to their disparity betweenstraight and LGBT families is based uponher work within faith communities and shehas little tolerance of those who hide behind“Christian values” as a rationale for discriminationagainst gay/lelsbian families, sheshared. She suggested that interested partiescontact Sinclair at gordon.sinclair@ymcatriangle.org.Lee Coggins reported that her family leftthe Y and are membersof Hollow Rock,which has been“very welcoming,”she said. “We evenhad our daughter’sbirthday party thereand it was justnormal. … For meto come back to theY, they’d need tochange their policiesand have their staffoffer a welcomingenvironment. You canfeel the disdain andjudgment just fillingout the application.I’m not spending money there to be ‘tolerated.’I did for a while because our daughter lovedthe indoor pool so much, but after a while, Ijust couldn’t stomach it. Also, nowwe love Hollow Rock and wouldn’tleave them.”Carrboro Mayor Mark Chilton(pictured) totally opposes the possiblemerger. According to Raleigh’s TheNews & Observer, he stated that hefelt it was a big mistake, even if thefinancial benefits were enticing. Thearticle also reported that on Dec. 14the Chapel Hill-Carrboro YMCA voted“to form a committee to discuss howand if the two organizations couldshare resources.” Two models arebeing reviewed, one that consists ofa management services agreement and theother as a full merger.Other officials who agree with Chilton areCarrboro Alderwoman Lydia Lavelle, ChapelHill-Carrboro City Schools board memberMia Day Burroughs and Chapel Hill Councilmember Penny Rich.The national YMCA’s website policy ondiversity and inclusion states: “The Y is madeup of people of all ages and from every walkof life working side by side to strengthencommunities. Together we work to ensureeveryone, regardless of gender, income, faith,sexual orientation or cultural background,has the opportunity to live life to its fullest. Weshare the values of caring, honesty, respectand responsibility — everything we do stemsfrom it.”In Charlotte, YMCA PR Director MollyThompson shared that there is no languagethat is in their membership application thatwould be discriminatory. She shared thatthey have a multitude of “families” amongits members. She indicated that in thesedays that a family is more than a mother andfather and children. A household family intheir terminology can consist of two adults(who may or may not be related), a parent,grandparent or aunt and children or a host ofother combinations. Families today, she said,come in all shapes and sizes. Charlotte has19 branches and two residential camps andserve 271,000.Greensboro’s Customer ServiceRepresentative Gordon Smith said thatfamilies consist of two adults, two adults andchildren or one adult and children and, as longas both adults live in the same household,they can be either two men, two women or aman and a woman. YMCA of Northwest NorthCarolina (which serves Winston-Salem andsurrounding areas) has a similar policy. (Forother YMCAs across the state, visit or calltheir facility to inquire about similar membershipopportunities.) : :

NEWSNew TOY director wants to providevoice of support, advocacyRodney Tucker comes to organization with experience, educationby Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.comCHARLOTTE – In December, Time Out Youth(TOY) hired a new executive director, RodneyTucker. Long-known for his involvement andwork with the community in a variety of ways,Tucker says he’s looking forward with optimismand excitement for TOY’s future growth.“I see the history of Time Out Youth as 20years to build on,” he says. “It’s exciting forme to come to an organization that has beenaround and sustained for 20 years.”Tucker is a native of nearby Oakboro,N.C., and a former employee of the RegionalHIV/AIDS Consortium. He’s also a formerdevelopment director for the Regional AIDSInterfaith Network and most recently servedas executive director for the Hickory-basedAIDS service organization, ALFA.Tucker holds degrees from the Universityof North Carolina-Charlotte and the SouthernBaptist Theological Seminary, including amaster’s degree in Christian education with afocus on child and family development. Startinghis career as a minister to homeless and at-riskyouth in New York City, Tucker says the opportunityto work at TOY brings him full circle.“It fits more clearly with my educationthan other jobs have,” he says. “A core partof me will always be a minister and my goalin seminary was to work in the inner citywith disenfranchised youth and homelesspeople. I’m back doing what I wanted to dowith my career.”With Tucker’s hire, TOY’s staff gets a bumpin expertise.“Everyone is a master’s-level clinician,”he says. “We have two program staffers whohave master’s degrees in social work and mewith my degree in counseling. It automaticallyups the bar with the types of services thatyouth will receive when they come throughthe doors here.”TOY’s services and connections with thebroader social service community in Charlottehave grown tremendously over the past fewyears. Tucker’s predecessor, Steve Bentley,shepherded the group through a period of rebuilding,rebranding and re-growth, includingoutreach to other professional child welfareorganizations and an involvement in countywidechildren’s initiatives.“The board is ready for TOY to be a stateleader and national model,” Tucker says.Already, TOY’s youth and staffers aretraveling the state with their speakers’bureau program and talking to organizationsand community leaders about gay-straightalliances, safe zones and how TOY’s supportservices function.Locally, TOY’s direction will take a decidedlymore advocacy role with increased outreachto schools and LGBT student leaders.“Working with the school system is abig push you’ll hear more about from TOY,”Tucker says.The group is already forging ahead withrelated plans. One full-time staff person,shared with the GayMen’s Chorus ofCharlotte, is workingto help develop andsustain LGBT highschool student leadersand LGBT studentorganizations.“One of theirfirst events was adance for all thegay-straight alliancesin MecklenburgCounty,” Tucker saysof the recent fallactivity. “We had 45youth together for anight to meet each other and to start buildinga network across school boundaries.”In all, students from eight different highschools attended the event.Helping to shape future community leadersis an important part of TOY’s mission. Itwill require more community involvement,Tucker warns.“Part of me is shocked that the gay communityhas not been as involved as volunteerswith TOY,” he says. “I want more people tocome into the doors and meet these kids. OurLGBT community has to be the ones to be thementors and provide example leadership tohelp our youth grow into the next set of leaders.Photo Credit:Roger PlasterWith big plans, Tuckersays TOY will need to uptheir ante on fundraising. Hispredecessor and the boardhave provided solid financialfooting with a six-monthcash reserve on hand.An increase in programmingcapabilities will takemore, though, and amongthe many items on Tucker’swish list is the potential forfuture partnerships andfunding from local, stateand federal agencies.Beyond fundraising andprogramming, Tucker’s chiefmission remains with the welfare of the youthhis group serves and ensuring that LGBTyoung people and their need to have a placeand voice at the table.Tucker says, “Part of the work that I wantto do is in the areas of people working withchildren and youth, to be the voice of the LGBTand to make sure that someone keeps bringingthat to the forefront in professional settings.” : :info: Want to learn more about Time OutYouth and how you can get involved?Visit their website at timeoutyouth.org or call704-344-8335.Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes 11

NEWSLocal PFLAG receivesnational honorSalisbury-Rowan chapter awarded at national conventionSALISBURY — The Salisbury-Rowan chapter ofParents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays(PFLAG) received the PFLAG National Chapter Awardfor Advocacy recently at the organization’s annualconvention in Washington, D.C.Pete Bonneau, a Food Lion executive and memberof the PFLAG National Board of Directors, acceptedthe award on behalf of the local chapter. The awardrecognizes a chapter’s contributions in the area ofadvocacy, one part of PFLAG’s threefold mission of support,education and advocacy. During the presentation,the chapter was cited for its successful scholarshipprogram, having awarded 15 separate $1,000 scholarshipsto Rowan County LGBT students and/ortheir straight allies, as well as having producedSalisbury’s first LGBT Pride celebration as primaryconsiderations for the award.“We are excited, and at the same time, humbledto receive this award”, said Mike Clawson, presidentof the local chapter. “With so many PFLAGchapters across the country doing such incrediblework in the areas of support, education and advocacy,we are honored to be recognized in this way. I’dlike to thank our Executive Committee, our membership,supporters and benefactors for their continuedcommitment to PFLAG’s mission and vision.”Local leader Pete Bonneau, a Food Lion executive and member of the PFLAG National Boardpresents an award to Salisbury-Rowan PFLAG President Mike Clawson.12 qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

Members of PFLAG chapters from acrossthe country traveled to the nation’s capitalfor the 2011 PFLAG National Convention. Theactivities during the four-day event includedlobbying members of the U.S. House andSenate to support and advance the SafeSchools Improvement Act and the StudentsNon-Discrimination Act, federal legislationthat will help build safer schools for theirLGBT loved ones.In addition to a day of advocacy onCapitol Hill, PFLAGers from around the countryenjoyed networking and attending workshopsand plenary sessions on a wide arrayof topics, including building safer schools,fundraising strategies, dialoguing aboutLGBT people in faith communities, and more.Speakers and guests for the conventionincluded Betty DeGeneres (mother of comedienneEllen DeGeneres), who receivedthe Betty DeGeneres Advocate Award andtalked about her work as a straight ally andher life as a mom to a lesbian daughter, Dr.Jill Biden, wife of Vice President Joe Biden,Massachusetts’ U.S. Rep. Barney Frankand Caitlyn Ryan, director of the FamilyAcceptance Project.“I am extremely proud of the many accomplishmentsof the Salisbury-Rowan PFLAGchapter” said Linda Stroupe, PFLAG SouthAtlantic regional director. “With over 300 chaptersnationwide, the receipt of the AdvocacyAward is a tremendous honor. I am so thankfulfor the many successes of this chapter.”PFLAG was founded in 1973 with thesimple act of a mother publicly supportingher gay son and is the nation’s foremostfamily orientated ally organization. PFLAG iscommitted to securing full civil rights for lesbian,gay, bisexual and transgender peopleby providing support, education and advocacy.PFLAG National has grown to includemore than 200,000 members and supportersin more than 350 chapters throughout theUnited States.To learn more, please visit pflag.org orsalisbury-pflag.org. : :— Compiled by qnotes staff from releaseNEWSState organizationopposes amendmentSame-sex marriage denial damaging to mental healthRALEIGH — The North CarolinaPsychological Association released an oppositionstatement on the Defense of Marriageamendment in September. Equality NorthCarolina lauded the position.They assert: “There is no empiricalevidence that supports the denial of marriagerights to people in same-sex relationships.… There is empirical evidence that denialof marriage rights to people in same-sex relationshipsis damaging to their psychologicalhealth. … There is empirical evidence thatopposing denial of marriage rights initiativeshas beneficial psychological effects. … Froma social justice perspective, significant benefitsaccrue to all of us when diverse familiesare legally and socially sanctioned.”Care2 writer Steve Williams recentlysaid, “This policy statement is a powerfulresponse to the North Carolina GOPwho have been widely criticized for claimsthat gay marriage will damage so-calledtraditional marriage in the state, and that gaymarriage will hurt children. Legislators havealso claimed that gay marriage would be thesame as legalizing bestiality and polygamy.”To read the entire statement, visit care2.com/causes/nc-psychology-associationopposes-gay-marriage-ban.html.— Compiled by Lainey Millenqomunity qonexions uJan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes 13

14 qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

LIFEFrom farm to fork:Five ways to eat localthroughout the yearEating locally-grown food has personal,community benefitsFresh food is harder to come by once the last leaves fall and the frost setsin, but there are still a number of ways you can keep your commitment to eatinglocally alive year round.Engaging people who are interested in living healthier and greener, GoodHousekeeping recently partnered with LG Electronics this fall on a “LivingGreener” initiative, showing consumers across the country how to make themost of local produce and other healthy foods. The program encourages agreener lifestyle, providing consumers with tips and ideas for efficient products,such as LG’s new refrigerator, which the company says helps to maintainsuperior humidity and temperature levels to help keep food fresh longer.Susan Westmoreland, food director of the Good Housekeeping ResearchInstitute offers these tips to keep eating local even after the growing seasonis done:• Support year-round community support agriculture (CSA) projects and farmersmarkets.• Make good use of your refrigerator and freezer.• Can and preserve.• Stock up on hearty vegetables that last longer.• Patronize restaurants that focus year-round on the freshest, healthiestingredients. : :— ARAContent‘Farm-to-fork’ restaurants in CharlotteCharlotte is blessed with an abundance of restaurants that have taken on the local foods challenge.These below, and we’re sure many more, make an effort to include locally- or regionally-grown foodsand ingredients whenever possible.Bistro La Bon1322 Central Ave.704-333-4646bistrolabon.comBonterra1829 Cleveland Ave.704-333-WINE (9463)bonterradining.comCarpe Diem1535 Elizabeth Ave.704-377-7976carpediemrestaurant.comGood Food on Montford1701 Montford Dr.704-525-0881goodfoodonmontford.comHalcyon500 S. Tryon St.704-910-0865halcyonflavors.comHarvest Moon GrilleThe Dunhill Hotel235 N. Tryon St.704-342-1193harvestmoongrillecharlotte.comLuLu1911 Central Ave.704-376-2242luludinewine.comMimosa Grill327 S. Tryon St.704-343-0700harpersgroup.com/mimosa.aspNew South Kitchen8140 Providence Rd.Suite 300704-541-9990newsouthkitchen.comRevolution Pizza & Ale House3228 N. Davidson St.704-333-4440revolutionpizza.comTable 274274 S. Sharon Amity Rd.704-817-9721table274.com— Compiled byMatt ComerJan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes 15

A&Etell trinityby trinityqnotes contributorMeeting someoneoutside The GLBT BoxTrinity Dear,I’m 36, fun, good-looking and very educated. I just can’t go toGLBT bars, chat rooms or any other ridiculous place GLBTpeople go to meet each other. So, how can I meet my matchwithout dumping my self-respect?Roaming with Respect, Tulsa, OKDear Roaming,In GLBT life, gay bars,chat rooms and othermeaningless acts aresomewhat cultural andactually meaningful. It’swhere gay people werefirst allowed to be gay.However, darling, it’s2012, so you now canjoin a spiritual, political,educational or sportsgroup in the GLBT community.Many GLBT folksexclusively go to theseevents. It will give youthe self-respect you needand introduce you tomany GLBT’ers who havefound alternative meetingsituations. And, lastly,when you’re at these events, talk, socialize and act interested.Being gay is really great, so sell your fabulousness like a newcar, not a used one.Hey Trinity,When I was single, I had lots of freedom. Even though I waslonely at times, my life was all mine. Now, I feel like I’m aslave to my relationship. Is my dissatisfaction all in my mind?Trapped, Providence, RIHey Trapped,The way you see life is all in your mind, knowing that factshould give you freedom. So, honey, change in your mindwhat you can’t accept and accept in your mind what youcan’t change! (My cartoon shows you how I handle theharem issue.)Hello Trinity,Is it always proper, even in gay dating situations, to hold thedoor, stand up when someone is leaving the table and walksomeone to their house?Proper, South Beach, FLHello Proper,Yes it’s always proper, but establishingwho’s the leader or follower takes timeor, at least, a drink. Straights typicallystick to the established rules. But, untilyou know who’s who, go ahead, beproper, be courteous and be yourself.Yet, pumpkin, in those head-buntingsituations where both are leaders, taketurns and take videos…and send themto me!Dearest Trinity,I went on two blind dates last monthand everything went wrong. Mycompliments ended up as insults andeverything else I said turned to unintelligiblebabble. I want to sound likea poet, but I end up sounding like an idiot. I’m truly afraid toface another disaster.First Disasters, St. Louis, MODearest First Disasters,Yes, you do need some help, especially being yourself on firstdates. However, sweetie, don’t be too much yourself if it’s toobeat poet without a job, hint, hint. Even better why not read:Trinity’s Poetic Tips For DestroyingA First Date1. Looking sloppy, unkempt or like you just got over theflu means planning a second date is not gonna happenfor you!2. Laying all your cards on the table at first, leaves a waterloggedfirst date, with no chance of thirst.3. Discussing your financial, emotional or relationshiptroubles is like placing your dentures along side thechampagne bubbles.4. Being false, pretentious or telling over inflated lies, is a bigno-no unless you like short goodbyes.5. With charm, good attitude and a dose of intent, you can restassured this first date won’t end in lament.6. Planning future trips together or expressing spousal needscan turn any first date into a meal you want to heave.7. Going to a strip club, bathhouse or your favorite pickup barwith a new first date is the biggest faux pas!8. Having too many sexual needs or needing money to payyour way, is like violently murdering the bride on her beautifulwedding day.9. If you have anything “special” that your first date mightcatch, sharing this information should come from yourwords, not your snatch!10. And, lastly, expecting this date to be “everything youever wanted” is like forcing a child into a house thatis haunted! : :— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity washost of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama,and now performs globally.info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.comSponsored by: Provincetown Business Guild800-637-8696 . www.ptown.org16 qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

A&Eout in the starsby charlene lichtensteinqnotes contributorJanuary 7-20Sisyphus was a king who spent eternity pushinghis rock uphill only to have it roll back down overhis toes. Ah, if he were around, he could harnessthe energy of Mercury conjunct Pluto trine Jupiterand conjure up a way for the rocks to propel ontheir own steam. Push your dreams to the limitand stay out of falling rock zones.CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) There is too much goingon in your life as events will add a bit of surpriseto the choices. Pink Caps are goaded into makingsnap decisions and later find that these decisionsare based on very changeable facts. Smile forthe camera and make your debut as graceful andcharming as possible. They adore you today andforget your foibles tomorrow. You hope.AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) If you have been daydreamingthrough life, this time period delivers aclarion wake up call. Pow! All that you have cometo expect and know suddenly shakes, rattles androlls. Weak structures fall. Strong ones get stresscracks. But, when the dust settles and garbagegets hauled away you may just see the sunny skypeek through. Now, get to work, Aqueerius!PISCES (02.20-03.20) What is a friend? Certainlysomeone with whom you can share a laugh, whowill be there for you when the chips are down andwho tolerates even your most disgusting habits.Pals may surprise you, Guppie. Your social listundergoes revision. Potential pals gravitate toyour orbit like so many asteroids…or is it cosmicdebris? I guess we will soon find out.ARIES (03.21-04.20) Are you confident thatyour careful political maneuvering will pay offprofessionally? Let’s see how the organizationalchart shifts to fill the potholes in your corporatesuperhighway. Are you fated to middle management?Heck no. Be flexible, keep a good sense ofhumor and carefully invest your money. Then youcan buy the company and “clean house.”TAURUS (04.21-05.21) Queer Bulls cannot resttheir cases. There are suddenly too manyobjections to overcome. The best thing to do isto focus on any legal wranglings with an eyeto making a fresh and compelling argument.You shine in center stage and can even enlistexpert help. Sequester yourself in some far offhideaway and seek a friendly habeas corpus.Is the jury still out??GEMINI (05.22-06.21) Flirty pink Twins have arocket in their assorted pockets. You begin to boilover with an excess of sexual energy that needsto be released. But, are you in it for the long haul,lover? Right now, things may favor short bursts ofardor rather than luxuriously long stints and quantityrather than quality. Hmm, so why is it differentfrom any other time?CANCER (06.22-07.23) Even serene relationshipshave moments of explosive intensity.Prepare fora few skirmishes on the relationship border andextra stress along with the passion. As fast as itcomes is as fast as it goes. Real soon you mightsettle back into a dull routine. It is a shame thatyou can’t bottle all this intensity for an occasionalpick me up. Or, can you?LEO (07.24-08.23) There has never been a bettertime to make changes in your day-to-day workpattern. Nothing goes as planned in anything routine.Good! Proud Lions need more spice in theirlife. Look at the world with fresh eyes by paintingthat gray cubicle a hot pink. They’ll be talking forweeks. So, give them something to talk aboutbeyond small paint swatches and memos.VIRGO (08.24-09.23) Queer Virgins become knownfor their electric, eclectic passion. You are aptto feel charged to the point of being overloaded.There are too many places to go and people tosee. The dance music speeds up and the fun becomesfun, fun, fun. How much can you withstandbefore your wires fray and cause a fire? Wear anasbestos suit just in case and party on!LIBRA (09.24-10.23) Your domestic agenda getssidelined. Nothing that you plan to do around thehouse pans out in the expected way and thatgoes for projects and family interactions. Thingsthat go bump in the night also bump and grind inthe day. This can be good — you can see thingsin a new way. Just have plenty of cleaning materialat hand for the aftermath, proud Libra. Oops!SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) I just read an articleabout creating new words like “bagriculture.”Okay, here’s another one: “scorpionious” — adesperate attempt to stabilize ones world ascosmic forces wreak havoc with every word. Youhave some great thoughts and just need to sugarthe message. Avoid any scorpionious fallout byspeaking softly and carrying a big stick. Oh, youtease you.SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) In financial situationssometimes you’re up and sometimes you’redown. This is especially so now when your fiscalwindmill tilts with every breeze. Big money canbe gained or squandered — it is up to you. Myadvice is to avoid major purchases and contentyourself with window shopping. Perhaps, the bestthings in life are free? Oh, don’t make me laugh. : :© 2012 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All RightsReserved. Entertainment.info: Visit www.TheStarryEye.com fore-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry. Mybook “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology ForLesbians” from Simon & Schuster isavailable at bookstores and major booksites.Jan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes 17

Positive PostingsKnowledge is POWER!by Dale Pierce ~ Practice Manager/Ryan White Program DirectorIn this installment of our series we thought itwould be good to go back to a basic HIV 101 forall of us. If you are reading this and you don’t knowyour status, if you are sexually active, if you havebeen positive for a long time, this article is still foryou. Knowledge is power. When battling a diseaselike HIV, we all have to get back to the basicssometimes and remember that this is a disease thatis 100 percent preventable. Share this article withfriends and family and let’s educate and re-educatethe community.Thanks to the CDC, HRSA, and AMFAR fortheir resources in gathering this information foryou all.What is HIV?HIV stands for Human Immunodeficiency Virus.It is the virus that causes AIDS. A member of a groupof viruses called retroviruses, HIV infects human cellsand uses the energy and nutrients provided by thosecells to grow and reproduce.What is AIDS?AIDS stands for Acquired ImmunodeficiencySyndrome. It is a disease in which the body’s immunesystem breaks down and is unable to fight offinfections, known as “opportunistic infections,” andother illnesses that take advantage of a weakenedimmune system.When a person is infected with HIV, the virusenters the body and lives and multiplies primarily inthe white blood cells. These are immune cells thatnormally protect us from disease. The hallmark ofHIV infection is the progressive loss of a specifictype of immune cell called T-helper, or CD4, cells. Asthe virus grows, it damages or kills these and othercells, weakening the immune system and leaving theperson vulnerable to various opportunistic infectionsand other illnesses ranging from pneumonia tocancer. A person can receive a clinical diagnosisof AIDS, as defined by the U.S. Centers for DiseaseControl and Prevention (CDC), if he or she hastested positive for HIV and meets one or both ofthese conditions:• The presence of one or more AIDS-related infectionsor illnesses;• A CD4 count that has reached or fallen below200 cells per cubic millimeter of blood. Alsocalled the T-cell count, the CD4 count ranges from450 to 1200 in healthy individuals.How many people are affected byHIV/AIDS?The Joint United Nations Program on HIV/AIDS(UNAIDS) estimates that there are now 33 millionpeople living with HIV/AIDS worldwide. Mostof them do not know they carry HIV and may bespreading the virus to others. In the U.S., approximately1.1 million people are living with HIV/AIDS;about 56,300 Americans became newly infectedwith HIV in 2006. And the CDC estimates that onefifthof all people with HIV in the U.S. do not knowthey are carrying the virus.Since the beginning of the epidemic, AIDS haskilled more than 25 million people worldwide, includingmore than 583,000 Americans. AIDS rankswith malaria and tuberculosis as one of the top threedeadliest infectious diseases among adults and is thefourth leading cause of death worldwide. More than15 million children have been orphaned by HIV.How is HIV transmitted?• Unprotected sexual intercourse (either vaginalor anal) with someone who has HIV. Anal sex(whether male-male or male-female) poses a highrisk mainly to the receptive partner, because thelining of the anus and rectum is extremely thin andis filled with small blood vessels that can be easilyinjured during intercourse.• Sharing needles or syringes with someone whois HIV infected. Laboratory studies show thatinfectious HIV can survive in used syringes for amonth or more. Other types of needles, such asthose used for body piercing and tattoos, can alsocarry HIV.• Infection during pregnancy, childbirth, or breastfeeding(mother-to-infant transmission). Anywoman who is pregnant or considering becomingpregnant and thinks she may have been exposedto HIV — even if the exposure occurred years ago— should seek testing and counseling. In the U.S.,mother-to-infant transmission has dropped to justa few cases each year because pregnant womenare routinely tested for HIV. Those who test positivecan get drugs to prevent HIV from being passedon to a fetus or infant, and they are counseled notto breast-feed.• Unprotected oral sex with someone who has HIV.There are far fewer cases of HIV transmissionattributed to oral sex than to either vaginal or analintercourse, but oral-genital contact poses a clearrisk of HIV infection, particularly when ejaculationoccurs in the mouth. This risk goes up when eitherpartner has cuts or sores, such as those causedby sexually transmitted infections (STIs), recenttooth-brushing, or canker sores, which can allowthe virus to enter the bloodstream.It is our hope at Rosedale Infectious Diseasesthat this article sparks conversations around thecommunity and by educating the population, wecan decrease stigma and the spread of this disease.If you need an appointment to find your status, thelocal health department and almost any primarycare doctor can run an HIV test for you. If you findyourself in need of HIV services, PLEASE call us atRosedale ID at 704-948-8582 or visit or website atwww.rosedaleid.com.Don’t forget to visit on Facebook forcommunity and clinical updates.— Sponsored Content —18 qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

Qqnotes eventsgoqnotes.com/qguide/eventsarts. entertainment. news. views.Jan. 8 • Winston-SalemFirst Sunday Tea DanceWinston-Salem’s montly Sunday Tea Dancewill be held on a special New Year date onJan. 8. No cover, free food, drink specials andmusic by DJ Clash. A percentage of the drinksales will benefit Equality Winston-Salem.Blue, 271 W. 4th St. 5-8 p.m. 336-918-0902.outatthemovieswinston.org.Jan. 11-15 • Chapel Hill‘No Child…’Nilaja Sun brings her exuberant, insightful,critically acclaimed portrait of life at fictionalMalcolm X High School to the PRC2 stage.“No Child…” has been showered withawards, including the Obie Award, OuterCritics Circle Awards for Best New AmericanPlay and Best Solo Performance and the USComedy Arts Festival Award for Best SoloShow. Elizabeth Price Kenan Theatre, Centerfor Dramatic Art, 150 Country Club Rd. Varioustimes. playmakersrep.org/nochild/.Jan. 14 • Winston-SalemFilm screeningOUT at the Movies Winston-Salem screens“Going Down in La-La Land” on the campusof the University of North Carolina School ofwe want yourwho/what/whereSubmitting an event for inclusion in ourcalendar has never been easier:visit goqnotes.com/qguide/events/submitthe Arts, 1533 S. Main St. 7-8:45 p.m. Ticketinformation call 336-918-0902.outatthemovieswinston.org.Jan. 14 • RaleighOpen mic nightExpress yourself on the second Saturday ofevery month as the LGBT Center of Raleighopens its doors to let you have your say atCenter OpenMic. We suggest the generaltopic of the month and hand you the microphone.Express yourself through dramaticreading, spoken word, scripted presentations,free expression. Coffee and refreshmentsprovided. Sign up to speak as you come in thedoor. LGBT Center of Raleigh, 411 HillsboroughSt. 7:30 p.m. Free. 919-832-4484.lgbtcenterofraleigh.com.Jan. 15 • Charlotte‘Queer As Folk’ DJ spinsFresh to the Charlotte scene, DJ Peter Prestaof “Queer As Folk” fame joins opening DJsJason Fotizo and Brittany Gaston with hostDan Mauney for a special “Queer As Folk”Circuit Party at Dharma Lounge, 1440 S. TryonSt. 704-334-8336. dharmacharlotte.com.Jan. 15 • Winston-SalemMr. Don’t H8Celebrity Jason Dottley of “Sordid Lives” willappear at the first national Don’t H8 pageant.Featuring Mr. Don’t H8 2011 Stone Parqueand Mr. Don’t H8 2010 Chip Matthews. ClubCO2, 4019 Country Club Rd. 9 p.m. facebook.com/event.php?eid=203536659715229.Jan. 17 • CharlotteMeet the DunnsThe Charlotte Business Guild hosts a specialmonthly meeting with local transgenderactivist and civic leader Roberta Dunn andher wife, Jay. LGBT Community Center ofCharlotte, 820 Hamilton St., Suite B11. 5:30-8p.m. $20 admission includes dinner. Cashbar available. charlottebusinessguild.org.gaycharlotte.com.Jan. 19 • CharlotteMiss Gay South CarolinaThe Miss Gay South Carolina U.S.ofA.Pageant, themed “Year of the Drag-On,” willbe held at Scorpio, 2301 Freedom Dr. 6 p.m.704-517-4009. info@scusofa.com.scusofa.com.Jan. 19-22 • Blowing RockGay Ski WeekendThe 4th Annual NC Gay Ski Weekend takesover Blowing Rock. Organizers say the eventwill be bigger and better than ever with morehost properties and more events, includingappearances by Logo’s “A List New York”star Rodiney Santiago and comedian FortuneFeimster from “Chelsea Lately.”ncgayskiweekend.com.Jan. 20-Feb. 5 • Charlotte‘Doubt’Theatre Charlotte presents 2005 PulitzerPrize and Tony Award winning play “Doubt:A Parable” by John Patrick Shanley. In theplay, Sister Aloysius, a Bronx school principal,suspects that the young Father Flynn has hadan inappropriate relationship with a malestudent. Theatre Charlotte, 501 Queens Rd.Days/times vary. Prices vary. 704-376-3777.theatrecharlotte.org.Jan. 21 • SalisburyBrent ChildersBrent Childers, executive director of Faith inA&EDharmaLoungepresents QAFcircuit partyAmerica, will speak at a regular meeting ofthe Salisbury-Rowan PFLAG. Haven LutheranChurch, 207 W. Harrison St. 10 a.m.-noon.Free. salisbury-pflag.org.Jan. 27-March 24 • CharlotteExhibit: CONVERGE“Converge” features renowned artistsQuisqueya Henriquez and Sonya Clark andthe pieces they created while in residenceat the Center. Exploring themes of identityand inclusion, the work showcased in theexhibition will represent a convergence ofart, history and diverse cultures. McCollCenter for Visual Art, 721 N. Tryon St. Hoursvary by day. 704-332-5535.mccollcenter.org.Feb. 5-7 • CharlotteCommunity HIV trainingThe Communicable Disease Branch ofthe N.C. Division of Public Health andother community partners present thefirst MAI/MSM Community and ProviderTraining Conference, bringing togetherrepresentatives from HIV care, treatmentand providers, along with members of thecommunity that are affected by HIV disease.Registration is free but required and coversall training conference meals. Seating andattendance is limited. Charlotte City CenterMarriott, 100 W. Trade St. Register online atnorthwestahec.wfubmc.edu/mura/www/#/event/36019.Charlotte’s Dharma Lounge will welcome with stylenationally renowned DJ and recent Charlotte newcomerDJ Peter Presta of “Queer As Folk” fame at their Jan. 15“Queer As Folk” Circuit Dance Party featuring host DanMauney of Takeover Friday and DJs Jason Fotizo andBrittany Gaston.Presta became well-known for his anthem “Proud,”the theme song for the hit Showtime series “Queer AsFolk.” The song will also be featured as the 2012 LondonOlympics theme song. Peter has produced over 400 recordsand worked with artists like Duran Duran, Rihanna,Sade and Usher.Doors open for the Jan. 15 special event at 9 p.m. to those 18 and up. Cover is $10. DharmaLounge is located at 1440 S. Tryon St., Suite 105. For more information, visit dharmacharlotte.comor call 704-334-8336.Meetings: Third Tuesday of every month, except whenthere is specialized programming, plus monthly socials topromote networking and friendshipProgram: A wide variety of topics of interest to appeal to thediverse LGBT communityTime: After work with a cash bar social and heavy hor d’oeuvreswith dinner and program followingMembership: Visit the website for application options and benefits.Information: Call 704.565.5075or email businessguild@yahoo.comfor more details or write toThe Charlotte Business GuildP.O. Box 33371 | Charlotte, NC 28233www.charlottebusinessguild.orgJan. 7-20 . 2012 qnotes 19

20 qnotes Jan. 7-20 . 2012

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