E-Book of Articles - World Federation of Music Therapy

Schulberg, Cecilia: Many Vioces In One ...
“periphery” of life; and she also realized how this prevented her from living
life fully.
She wasn’t able to attend the 2 nd . 2 nd . generation GIM group meeting. In
the 3 rd . individual session, she expressed a great deal of sadness over not
being able to have children due to having uteran cancer 3 _ years earlier.
This is a double-edged sword being the child of Holocaust survivors and not
being able to regenerate what was lost, and this produces guilt as well.
Now she’s with a partner who wants to adopt a child and she’s ambivalent.
She took all these feelings into her 3 rd . and final GIM experience. At this
time, I had been experimenting with the soundtrack to “Schindler’s List,”
and felt the 2 nd . selection, “krakow Ghetto” matched her mood.
#1 - [Pause] it feels like I’m going down into the layers of my soul - (What
do you notice there?) it’s pretty heavy - dark - it’s wants to be held and
nurtured - (what?) my soul, my child, my core - (can you do that?) yeah, I
can do it - my core feels very vulnerable, the music_s deep and heavy and
melancholy - my soul feels very fragile, not real strong - it_s real sad - limp
- [pause] I also hate that image - (what do you hate about it?) want to see
myself as strong and tough, maybe I_m not, think my mother wants me to
be that kind of person and Itry to be for her, I admire that she_s that way,
I_m softer (be with that softness) - yeah, I think I am, I had a killer nature
in competition but I_m really a push-over and I don_t want anyone to know
that, learned that from my mother, not let anyone hurt you, but that_s not
who I am, I like that warmth, think that_s neat -
#2 - [“With Our Lives, We Give Life”] I have the memory of my mother
saying, you make your own life and world, and I guess that_s what she did -
and I haven_t done that [tears] - part of being a Jew is family, education,
pointed out by non-Jewish friend, realizing how important family is - at
some level I felt I wasn_t going to do it but I_m getting in touch with that
now - part of the culture, having a family - always really wanted to have
relationships with friends, can_t have the same thing - maybe looking in
the wrong places - my mother said to me, “You_ll be sorry one day,” could
hear that - (what about now?) you_re nothing without a family (let yourself
be with that) - [pause] I don_t think it has to be that way, that_s more my
mother_s voice (doesn_t have to be that way) -
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