Why Become a Parent?•Pressure from family and/orsociety•Desire to perpetuate family line•Self-fulfillment•Provide sibling for otherchild/children
Desire to Perpetuate FamilyLine•Want someone to carry on familyname•Desire to make parentsgrandparents
Pressure from Family•Parents want to BecomeGrandparents•Brothers and Sisters want toBecome Aunts and Uncles•To Provide Cousins for Niecesand Nephews
Self-Fulfillment•Want the warmth and closeness of afamily•Feel life is not complete withoutchild•Want to share love with a child•Think a child will expand my life•Feel children will strengthenrelationship
To Provide Sibling forOther Child/Children•Do not want a child to be an onlychild but to have brothers andsisters to grow up with•Want the family atmosphere ofmultiple children
Children and Relationships• Having a child to save a marriage orrelationship is NOT the right reason• Relationships must be stable and BOTHpeople in agreement that they want andchild and when they want a child.• Having a child in an unstable relationshipcan destroy the relationship.
Life Without Children byChoice
Financial•Do not feel they canfinancially provide for a childat present or ever
Heredity/Birth Defects•Family heredity of genetic birthdefects•Both parents carry therecessive gene for a specificbirth defect or health problem
Health Problems of Parents•One or both persons have a healthproblem that will make caring for achild difficult or impossible•One or both persons have a healthproblem that requires extensive andexpensive medical treatment
Not Parent Material•Limited or No Patience•Life style does not allow time forchildren•Material things more importantthan children•Focused on social time withfriends
Career Focused•Do not want to put career on holdbecause of children•Want to achieve career goalsbefore considering having children•Does not want to have time takenaway from work with children
Personal Feelings aboutEnvironment and Society•Feel society as a whole is bad anddo not want to bring a child into it•Feel that our environment isstretched and it is not able tosustain itself if population continuesto expand
Self-Centered•Do not want to give up time,money or choices for children –want to be able to do what theywant when they want and spendmoney on whatever they choose
Marriage Stability•Problems in marriage either inthe past or at present –recognize that adding a child toa marriage that has problemsadds to the problems ratherthan resolving them
Roles•Traditional Roles – mother stayshome and father works outsidehome•Both parents work outside home•Father stays home and motherworks outside home•One or both parents work fromhome
Meeting Needs of Children
Responsibilities of Parenthood•Provide Unconditional Love•Meet Physical Needs – food, clothing,shelter•Nurturing Environment•Provide for Social Needs•Instill Positive Character Traits•Encourage Independence
Provide Unconditional Love•Loving children regardless of theirbehavior – making sure they understandthat it is the behavior you do not likebut that you still love them.•That there is nothing they can do thatwill cause you to stop loving or to notlove them.
Meet Physical Needs•Food – Provide adequatenourishing and nutritionallydense foods.Children that are overweightare at risk of obesity anddiabetes due to unhealthy foodsand eating habits.
Clothing• Clothing should be age and size appropriate.• Easy care – washable• Does not have to be a certain brand or style –but peer pressure may influence child’s likesand dislikes in clothing. Letting them have asay in clothing choices will increase their selfesteem and their independence. They arealso more likely to wear it if they had achoice in selection.
• Young children my not be left at homealone – legal intervention will occur ifdiscoveredShelter• Housing of some type• There is no specific legal criteria becausethere are many children who are homelessand live in shelters and even cars. Whenthe health of the child is an issueintervention by an agency may occur.
Nurturing Environment• Provide a safe and secure environmentthat allows the child to grow anddevelop.• Child feels accepted and encouraged• Child is able to express their selfwithout fear of criticism or ridicule
Provide for Social Needs• Allows child to develop healthy relationshipswith other children• Involves child in age appropriate activitieswith other children• Encourages child to participate in appropriateactivities that they enjoy
Instill Positive CharacterTraits• Be a role model to child to demonstrate thebehavior you expect from them.• Make sure child understands right from wrongand consequences of improper behavior orchoices.• Model your values and morals and discuss withchild as age allows them to fully understand
Encourage Independence• Allow child to do things for their self - this ishow they learn and will improve over time and withrepetition.• Encourage child to keep trying when they becomefrustrated – show them how to perform task again• Do not be critical of attempts - better to saynothing than to criticize