A Motherhood Magazine for Edmontonians
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
04 EMPATHY IS EVERYTHING
06 BABIES PLAY?
14 WHERE DID I GO?
20 MADE YOU LOOK!
EAT + SLEEP
10 IT’S TIME TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT
13 THE GREATEST CHALLENGE: SLEEP
26 WHAT TO DO WITH TWO
30 TRAVELLING WITH BABY
INSPIRED | 01
A Motherhood Magazine for Edmontonians
From a family of passionate photographers, Lorraine grew up with
a camera in hand, photojournalistically capturing the world around
her. Since becoming a mother, Lorraine has lovingly witnessed family
histories, documenting lives, creating heirlooms to serve as family
legacies. Inspired was born of a desire to connect with and support both
mothers and local, independent entrepreneurs and businesses; Inspired
is Lorraine’s heartfelt offering to Edmonton’s motherhood community.
With the exception of advertisements and sponsored articles, Inspired’s
pages showcase Lorraine’s documentary style family photography.
All contents copyright © 2016 by the contributors
All Trademarks presented in this magazine are owned by the registered owner. All advertisements
appearing in this magazine are the sole responsibility of the person, business, or corporation
advertising their product or service. All content, photographs, and articles appearing in this
magazine are represented by the contributor as original content and the contributor will hold
Her Moleskine notebook forever in hand, Athena writes prose and
poetry, essays and articles on topics ranging from motherhood to
feminism to food. Also writing over at The Salty Almond, Athena
celebrates Edmonton’s food scene, community, and cooking with a focus
on supporting local. Athena’s addition to the Inspired team is a natural
collaboration that combines her writing, editing, and design skills.
As Inspired’s Editor, Athena curated and edited the articles within, in
addition to laying out the magazine and contributing her own work.
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
JENNIFER BLY is the author of My Kitchen, My Classroom: An Introduction to
Homeschool, creator of local blogs The Deliberate Mom and Deliberate Homeschooling,
and contributor to The Huffington Post. Jennifer writes about parenting, her faith,
and life with her husband and two girls. She has a Bachelor of Applied Human Service
Administration Degree with a specialization in Early Learning in Child Care.
CHRISTINE BRUCKMANN is the writer behind Just Another Edmonton Mommy
and a born and raised Edmontonian with a background in social work. As a trusted
voice for many families and passionate about supporting her local community, Christine
writes about things to see and do in Edmonton as a family, local events, DIYs, food, and
MARJORIE CAMPBELL is a bilingual stay-at-home mom with two children. From
Montreal, Marjorie has worked extensively as a volunteer in communications wearing
many hats: graphic designer, writer, and editor – most notably for the Glastonbury
Gazette. Married, she met her husband in London, England where she worked as the
graphic designer for the Canadian High Commission.
HANNAH HAMILTON writes at Edmonton blog, The Momoirs, where she shares her
honest and often hilarious take on motherhood. Dreaming of cultivating true community
wherever she happens to be, Hannah wants to live in a world full of creativity, where
naps are mandatory and good food is priority. When she isn’t writing you can find her
teaching yoga, taking pictures or sharing life with a friend over a bottle of wine when
not spending time with her husband and two mischievous little boys.
RACHEL JONES is the blogger behind Edmomton and is a new mother who recently
left the desk job of her dreams to parent full-time. A talker, connector, planner, and
community enthusiast, Rachel enjoys living in the heart of downtown Edmonton with
her young family. Learning as she goes, Edmomton centres on important places, news,
events, and resources for new parents in Edmonton.
CHELSEY KRAUSE is the author of novels Can’t Always Get What You Want and
All Shook Up. A nurse, wife, Starbucks addict, and mom to two girls, Chelsey can often
be found repurposing other people’s junk or considering whether or not the library will
let her move in. The rest of the time, she’s reviewing for Chicklit Club or writing.
CYNTHIA PRIEST was born and raised in Brunei, where co-sleeping is a cultural
norm, Cynthia is a cloth-diapering and baby-wearing first time mother, who loves to
cook and bake. Cynthia plays and teaches piano, develops recipes, maintains a food
blog, Cynful Kitchen, and aspires to write a cookbook in the near future.
SHAUNA ROUGHLEY is a photographer, writer, and mom to two boys. Her
photography business, Roughley Originals, is a partnership ran with her husband,
Gareth. When she’s not working, Shauna loves camping with her family and being
outside as much as she can. With a passion for travel, she hopes to continue to travel
the world with her family.
INSPIRED | 03
“As a mother, raising an empathetic child is my
primary goal. More than anything, I want my son
to approach and engage others with sensitivity and
EMPATHY IS EVERYTHING
BY ATHENA RAYPOLD
Unlike sympathy or compassion, which inevitably
place distance between two people – you feel sorry for
her loss, you feel compassion for his pain – empathy
requires that you understand and share another’s
feelings and respond in kind. It compels us to disengage
from our own thoughts and feelings in order to
engage in another’s; which can be extremely difficult,
particularly during a disagreement. But when we
willingly enter another’s emotional space with empathy
– be it frustration, grief, or elation –we find genuine
As a mother, raising an empathetic child is my primary
goal. More than anything, I want my son to approach
and engage others with sensitivity and kindness. When
he sees someone struggling, I want him to respond
with empathy, to be supportive, helpful, genuine, and
gentle with others. Because when we allow ourselves to
view a situation from another’s perspective, we truly
hear them. And being heard, being understood, is
paramount to creating trusting relationships and happy
people. Empathy is healing. Empathy is understanding.
Empathy is everything.
John Medina, author of Brain Rules for Baby, dubs
empathy “the glue of relationships” because it binds us
to each other. Medina argues that the seeds of empathy
are planted in parenthood. Through parents’ conscious
choice to practice empathy with each other, they not
only mitigate and reduce marital conflict, but they
also positively affect their baby’s development. Medina
notes that “Infants younger than 6 months old can
usually detect that something is wrong [when parents
are in conflict]. They can experience physiological
changes – such as increases in blood pressure, heart
rate, and stress hormones – just like adults.”
Stress hormones are detrimental to babies and can
increase risk of anxiety disorders, depression, lower
the immune system, inhibit focus, decrease emotional
regulation, and lower IQs. However, this doesn’t
mean that we should avoid conflict at all costs because
conflict is inevitable. What’s important is how we
engage in conflict, how we fight with each other,
and especially, how we make up. In conflict, then,
we should refrain from abuse and name calling, stick
to the “When you..., I feel...” statements and if your
baby is present, resolve that conflict in front of her.
Babies absorb everything: tone, body language, facial
expressions, but if they witness conflict followed by
healthy resolution, they will internalize and grow up
understanding that disagreement is normal, but that
through empathizing as a way to resolve conflicts,
relationships are nurtured instead of injured. Thus,
raising an empathetic child starts with practicing
empathy ourselves – with our partners, our families,
and our children.
For anyone, but particularly babies, empathy has a
calming effect. When your baby is teething and in pain,
respond with affection and verbalize what you imagine
your baby is feeling, “I know, honey, your mouth is
hurting you.” Medina says, “Your ability to move from
you to them, which is what empathy forces anyone to
do, makes all the difference to your child’s brain.” As
hard as it is to catch yourself when you’re frustrated,
when your baby is forcibly squirming away mid diaper
change, or melting down in a store, the more you
vocalize what he’s feeling, name his emotions, and
empathize with him, the sooner your baby will calm
himself. And the more you practice empathy, the more
you model it for your child.
Even as young as six months old, babies look to their
parents for how to respond and interpret the world
around them. How we engage and speak to our babies
and children matters, we must empathize with them,
especially when we feel frustrated by their behavior; we
must talk about other people’s feelings (ours, theirs,
their friends, their siblings, and even their pets); we
must give them examples of how to show empathy (i.e.
Sarah’s upset, let’s offer her a hug); and we must model
empathy for them in our interactions with others. As
Medina says, “The more empathy your child sees, the
more socially competent he’ll become, and the happier
he’ll be.” And what parents universally want more than
anything is happy children.
References: Medina, John. Brain Rules for Baby.
Seattle: Pear Press, 2014. Print.
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
“The brain is the only unfinished organ at birth”
(Schiller, n.d.). Isn’t that amazing? This means that you
can directly contribute to the formation of your child’s
brain. While secure, caring relationships are essential,
there are some other things that parents can do to help
nurture healthy brain development. Here are some of
my favourite brain-building activities for babies.
Cause and Effect
Babies learn through interactions with things in their
world. Set up activities that allow your infant to
experiment with cause and effect.
• Stack some soft blocks for your infant. Watch him
knock it down. Repeat.
• Place a soft ball by your infant, when it rolls away,
bring it back to her. Repeat. When your infant is
older, she will enjoy crawling over to the ball and
pushing it away.
• Shaking any toy that makes noise is a great cause and
• Set up shatterproof mirrors for your infant to
interact with. Wave at the mirror, make faces, smile,
• Place a lightweight piece of fabric on a chair or stool
by your baby. Allow your baby to pull the fabric off.
This is a wonderful time to expose your infant to a
variety of music. Classical, jazz, ethnic, contemporary…
make time to play music for your infant. Observe his
face as he hears the tunes. You can also dance with him
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
or play along with his favourite rattles.
Read. Read. Read.
I cannot over-emphasize the importance of reading
to young children. This key component of brain
development applies to babies as well! Short, repetitive
stories are wonderful for infants.
Allow your infant to interact with books too! Babies
learn so much by touching and putting things in their
mouths! My favourite books are the “Indestructible
Books.” The manufacturers claim that these books
are “chew proof, tear proof, non-toxic and washable.”
I also love that the nursery rhyme stories show
interesting, worldly “twists” on the rhymes.
Rhymes and Songs
Words are a big part of your infant’s brain
development. Sing to your infant – any simple song
will do! You don’t even have to be a good singer; your
baby doesn’t care if you can carry a tune. Simply make
eye contact with your baby and belt out those tunes.
Simple classics like Mary Had A Little Lamb, The
Wheels On The Bus, and the Itsy, Bitsy Spider will
surely delight your infant.
Infants learn about their world through their senses.
Expose your baby to a variety of sensory experiences.
Set up an environment which is safe for them to
explore, taste, and touch:
• Place a variety of different fabrics around your infant
and allow him to explore the different textures
and colours. You can extend this activity by using
descriptive words with your infant while he is
exploring the fabrics i.e. rough, soft, smooth, silky,
• Fill a large Ziploc bag with shaving cream and two
different colours of paint. Tape the opening closed
and secure it to your infant’s high chair with more
packing tape. Allow her to squish and squeeze the
bag. The texture is unique and the mixing of the
colours is fascinating. The bag can be filled with
other things as well… hair gel and glitter; water, food
colouring and oil; etc. Get creative!
• Allow your infant to finger paint. Afraid they’ll
eat the paint? Let them finger paint with food (rice
cereal, pudding, etc.).
• Infants are fascinated by water. Set up a small basin
of water and allow him to splash and play with it.
(Always make sure to be present when your infant is
playing with water).
• Cut shapes out of sandpaper, foil, and other
materials and tape the shapes to the tray of her
highchair. Your baby will love touching these
What baby doesn’t love Peek-A-Boo? You can also cover
baby’s favourite toy with a piece of fabric or a bowl,
then unveil it: now you see it, now you don’t!
Talk. Talk. Talk.
Your baby loves you and your voice delights him in
ways you can’t even imagine. You are his world! Talk to
your baby frequently.
• Let your baby know all the steps of her diaper
change, “Off come your pants; there’s your belly;
Mommy’s wiping your bum clean; here’s a fresh
• If your baby is in the early babbling phase, mimic his
• Extend her simple sounds into words (i.e. mmmmm…
mama; baaaaa… baby; duh… dada, etc.)
Playing with your baby creates special, precious
moments. It’s such a privilege to watch our babies learn
and grow. Enjoy this age and stage because it really does
go by quickly!
Schiller, P. (n.d.). Brain research and implications for
early childhood programs. Retrieved January 19, 2012,
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INSPIRED | 07
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IN-HOME SUPPORT WITH YOUR NEWBORN
BY APRIL FERMANIUK, EDMONTON AREA FAMILY DOULAS
“It’s tough having a tiny human full of demands in the house, let us
take care of the demands, so you can enjoy the tiny human.”
Providing Domestic In-Home
You’ve never heard of a Postpartum Doula, have you?
Hiring an Edmonton Area Family Postpartum Doula
can aid in transitioning a family who has just brought
home a brand new screaming, pooping, um I mean,
beautiful bundle of joy (that doesn’t sleep at night).
As a Postpartum Doula I will be the domestic servant
you didn’t know you couldn’t live without. Don’t
fret about that load of laundry you forgot to wash
(again) or the floors that still need to be swept. As your
Postpartum Doula I will sweep in and tidy everything
for you so you can enjoy quality time with your family.
It’s tough having a tiny human full of demands in the
house; let me take care of the demands so you can enjoy
the tiny human.
Personal culinarian at your service: you forgot to eat
breakfast today? Oh and maybe lunch too? Not to
worry! I will prepare you a healthy snack and bring
it to you while you feed your baby, or I can feed your
baby a bottle while you eat. I’ll even throw your lasagna
into the oven for supper. #postpartumdoulasdothat
Invite your Postpartum Doula for a sleepover! You
didn’t realize your tiny human could eat and poop
every two hours all night long, did you? Or only want
to sleep attached to you? When I spend the night, I
can help bring your baby to you when she is ready to
breastfeed, or I can bottle-feed him for you, so you can
sleep. Let me be the one to change his diaper, swaddle
her tight, or rock him back to sleep.
In all seriousness, we are postpartum professionals who
have undergone extensive training through ProDoula
in order to best support a mom and her family after her
baby is born.
INSPIRED | 09
EAT + SLEEP
“I wasn’t the only one who felt overwhelmed, guilty, or concerned
about feeding my baby.”
IT’S TIME TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT FEEDING
BY RACHEL JONES
As a first-time mom, feeding my baby was a constant
source of concern, but I’m realizing that, after fifteen
months, it didn’t have to be. While pregnant, I had read
and heard unfamiliar terms like lactation, let-down,
latch, supply, top-up, formula, donor milk, colostrum,
mastitis, expressing, engorgement, pumping, bottlefeeding,
solids, purees, infant cereal, and baby-lead
weaning. Feeding seemed to be a big topic, but nothing
I couldn’t handle.
When my baby was born, and breastfeeding began, I
started to experience what some of these words meant.
I felt overwhelmed. I wanted to give up. I sobbed to my
mom, telling her I didn’t have the strength to keep it up
for much longer. I wondered if I should be nursing on
a set schedule, if I was producing enough milk, or if I
was eating something that upset my baby. I thought my
son would miraculously sleep through the night if I fed
him formula, but I felt guilty if I gave it to him; it was a
time-consuming (and sometimes embarrassing) process
to get my boob out; trying to bottle-feed felt like more
effort than pumping; and my boy has a tongue and lip
tie, so we had to work at getting him to latch properly.
It felt like an endless struggle.
Once I’d met other moms who’d had difficulties,
my perspective changed. Some of my friends were
unable to breastfeed due to post-partum depression
and anxiety, physical pain, or an anatomical inability
to express milk. Some babies couldn’t latch. Some
babies were fed formula or donor milk from their first
day of life. Some mothers pumped exclusively just to
bottle-feed breastmilk. I wasn’t the only one who felt
overwhelmed, guilty, or concerned about feeding my
baby. I started to feel better – because it was tough
for everyone.After three months, my baby and I had a
routine down. At five months, he was trying solids. But
then the worry crept back again – this time, about food
variety. I would buy one of every vegetable, making a
puree for each. It was time consuming and sometimes
frustrating to have my baby reject it. But, I kept at it.
And it got better and better. Six, nine, twelve, and now
fifteen months have gone by, and guess what? We are
still breastfeeding, imagine that!
I wish I could rewind the clock and tell myself to keep
it simple. I’d tell myself to trust my instinct and mute
the opinions of others unless they were positive. I’d be
more confident in my choices and adapt when I felt the
need. I would reach out for more support, and I’d try
to feel good about my choices from the beginning - for
myself and for my baby.
Grey Nuns: 780.735.7346
Misericordia Hospital: 780.735.2577
Royal Alexandra: 780.735.4605
La Leche League facilities offer free group and oneon-one
breastfeeding support in your community.
Meetings are held by volunteers and are listed online.
go to www.lllc.ca and search your area for information
on the meeting date, time, and location. Call
1.800.665.4324 if you have questions.
Entrepreneur Mom Now supports members
like Kaye Burrows, owner of Core Love,
Prenatal and Postpartum fitness in Edmonton!
Visit her at corelove.ca
Kaye can take advantage of group mastermind
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Learn more at entrepreneurmomnow.com
Join our free Facebook Group for networking!
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
EAT + SLEEP
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
EAT + SLEEP
“ They don’t have to know that I bed-share. It’s our
dirty little secret.”
THE GREATEST CHALLENGE: SLEEP
BY CYNTHIA PRIEST
Babies are primal beings; they will wake up hungry and
cry. Sharing a room with my almost three-month old
son, Art, has been such a joy; I fall back asleep so much
more easily. As Art sleeps for four hour stretches or
more, it has been five nights since I have moved him to
the nursery. Nonetheless, we still bed-share when it is
time for his night time feedings.
Bed-sharing can be such a dirty word, can’t it? My
cousin who gave me the What to Expect books firmly
told me that sharing a room is fine, but I should never
bed-share for fear of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome
(SIDS). If you are breastfeeding, however, bed-sharing
is completely safe. The night I chose not to bed-share, I
woke up a few hours later in the rocker glider, instantly
panicking about whether or not I had dropped Art.
Worse, my husband once found me napping in a
recliner with Art rooting on my lap, edging towards the
foot of the chair, not in my arms!
When my husband and I were taking Hypnobabies
birth classes during pregnancy, the instructor
recommended that we read Sweet Sleep - Nighttime and
Naptime Strategies for the Breastfeeding Family by La
Leche League International (LLLi). The book outlines
the following requirements for safe bed-sharing: you
must be a non-smoker; you must be sober (not using
drugs, alcohol or drowsy medications); you must be
breastfeeding; your baby needs to be full-term and
healthy; your baby needs to be kept on his back when
he is not nursing; your baby needs to be unswaddled
and lightly dressed; and, both baby and mother need
to be on a safe surface. For a safe surface, since our
bed has a soft memory foam, we place yoga and rubber
mats on my side of the bed under fitted sheets, with
an adult-sized bed meshed rail, so that our baby will
not fall once he starts to roll (do not bed-share on the
sofa). Keep the baby at breast-level, expose one breast,
curl around your baby for sleep while laying on your
side and you will immediately form a protective frame.
LLLi calls this the “cuddle curl,” which is also known
as the side-by-side nursing position. Make sure you do
not use any nursing pillows as they can be a suffocation
hazard. Oh, and you want to make sure you place a
waterproof mattress protector under the mats for
potential blowouts and leaks.
As the weather starts to get chillier at night, to keep
myself warm, I wear a long sleeved nursing pyjama
top and a pair of long johns with socks. My hair is
usually up in a high ponytail bun. For comfort, I use
a tiny pillow wedged between both knees to maintain
a sideways position for a long time. It isn’t a foreign
position to sleep in since I have been trained to sleep
sideways with a Snoogle during pregnancy!
Babies are not easy to sleep with! Some babies don’t
like sleeping on their backs, but bed-sharing saved my
life as I was able to let Art sleep with his shoulders on
my arm in the cuddle curl. “How is the baby sleeping?”
I am often asked. I smile and say, “Good.” They don’t
have to know that I bed-share. It’s our dirty little
secret: I get decent sleep while getting cuddles with an
infant who seems to grow so fast by the day.
References: Wiessinger, Diane, Diana West, Linda J.
Smith, and Teresa Pitman. Sweet Sleep. New York:
Ballantine Books, 2014. N. pag. Print.
INSPIRED | 13
“Becoming a parent isn’t necessarily akin to drowning or walking
an endless desert (though, there are times, when it certainly feels
that way), but I feel like there’s this cultural expectation that
“good” mothers live their entire lives for their children. And this
pressure can make you feel like you’re the worst mother ever.”
WHERE DID I GO?
BY CHELSEY KRAUSE
To be honest, the first few months (with both kids)
are a blur. I’m so glad for photos, they captured the
months that I was too busy and frazzled to really
remember clearly. When I was pregnant for the first
time, I didn’t realize how fully and completely having
a baby would change me, change my life, my goals,
my worldview. Sometimes I wonder what the hell I
did with my time before I had kids; my day revolves
around them so much now, that it’s hard to remember
what life was like before them. Before kids, I worked
full time as a nurse on a busy acute care ward. I met
up with girlfriends, I read books, and I had sex with
my husband whenever we wanted, wherever we wanted
(can any of you relate? If not, I’m sure you’re laughing,
and that’s good).
And then, I had my darling baby girl and suddenly, my
entire life revolved around this beautiful, demanding
creature. Between feedings and naps and consoling her
cries, I rarely had time for myself. I was just so focused
on being a mom and keeping my baby alive that there
were days I’d forget to eat. And privacy? Pffft. Forget
privacy. For months, I’d set her up in a bouncy chair in
the bathroom with me so I could shower. (That doesn’t
go away, by the way! My four-year-old still loves to
barge into the bathroom just to say “I love you” or ask
what I’m doing).
Anyway. So had I this new baby. I loved this dear, sweet
little one more than anything. I loved cuddling her and
dressing her in cute outfits and talking to her. I enjoyed
taking her for walks, and playing with her, and giving
her baths. But there were many days (most days, in
fact), where I would cry and feel helpless and absolutely
lost when I couldn’t console her, no matter what I did.
And once I finally got her to sleep, and she slept for
three hours, I was convinced that she’d died then felt
guilty for wanting her to fall asleep at all.
I was in a body that I didn’t recognize, I felt
embarrassed that I had to wear maternity pants for
months after delivery because they were the only
thing that felt comfortable. My once clean, trendy
living room was peppered with gaudy toys and huge
battery operated swings and burp rags and wipes. My
pretty purses were replaced with ugly, squashy diaper
bags. My husband and I were usually too exhausted to
do much more than watch TV and go to bed. These
might sound like trite complaints, but damn, they
felt important! And though I absolutely loved being a
mom, I felt as though the things that made me me were
Life became more complicated when I had my second
baby. I was so excited to have a new baby girl. I loved
that my two girls were close in age, and envisioned
them being close sisters, but life got complicated fast.
My new baby projectile vomited at every single feeding.
She’d drink for a few minutes, and then wail loudly, as
through she were in extreme pain. She wasn’t growing
well. Changing her diaper and bathing her were
absolute torture because I could see each of her ribs,
so I consulted my midwife and doctor about possible
reasons and solutions. I tried feeding her upright. I
elevated the head of her bed, so she’d digest better. I
fed her in quiet, dark rooms, where she could focus
(because if the slightest sound or movement disturbed
her, she’d come off my breast, wailing). Nothing
seemed to work. My doctor thought it might be reflux,
but figured she’d grow out of it.
When she was older and I tried giving her solids,
she’d either choke or puke everything up, and cry
inconsolably. Every meal felt like going into battle. I
started to dread feeding her. It even got to the point
where I had to feed her with a syringe, a few millilitres
at a time, just to get something into her. At my request,
we finally got a swallowing assessment done, followed
by visits with dietitians and occupational therapists,
all of whom reassured me that I was doing everything
I could, and that she was probably just following her
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
own growth curve. But when I’d bring her into the
public health clinic, I had judgy nurses breathing down
my neck, accusing me of not feeding my baby properly,
sending fiery letters to my doctor. On top of this, my
husband was working a lot of overtime, including 12-
hour night shifts, and I was potty training my two-yearold.
My maternity leave was almost done, and I dreaded
going back to the stressful, understaffed environment
of hospital nursing, but I didn’t want to give up my
career. I was stressed beyond comprehension.
Now, this might seem like a weird time for me to start
writing a book, but that’s what I did. My youngest was
about nine-months old, as I recall. Looking back, it
seems so strange, but I’d always wanted to a be a writer,
and had this idea for a book. And one night, when my
husband was working and my kids were in bed, I just
decided to start. I used writing to explore my fears of
choosing the wrong career, and to wonder what my
future options might be. I used writing to enter a new
world for a while, and to forget about my own. It was
cathartic, soothing, exciting! And though it didn’t erase
or diminish any of the challenges I was facing in real
life, for me, writing became my lifeline. I felt like I got
a bit of myself back.
Now, my kids are four and six years old, I’ve written
and published two books (the first with Random
House in 2015, and the second this summer, with Tryst
Books), I’ve just done my first book signing and book
launch this summer, and I’m getting great reviews. I
love writing and I plan to do this for the rest of my life.
Being a writer is something I’ve wanted to do since I
was a child, and I feel like it’s an important part of me.
I imagine you’re thinking, “I can’t do that. Besides, I
don’t even know what I’d want to do!” Believe me, I
hear you. The challenges you’re facing right now are
real. Each family situation is different. And yet, I’d
venture that despite the varying details, every new
parent feels exhausted, overwhelmed, and drained. I’ve
been there, and I imagine that some days, dear reader,
you feel like you’re barely keeping your head above
the surface. You feel like you’re about to drown. I
don’t mean to make it sound more dramatic than it is.
Becoming a parent isn’t necessarily akin to drowning
or walking an endless desert (though, there are times,
when it certainly feels that way), but I feel like there’s
this cultural expectation that “good” mothers live their
entire lives for their children. And this pressure can
make you feel like you’re the worst mother ever.
For example, if I go out without my children, I can
guarantee that someone will ask “So, who has the
kids?” My husband is rarely asked this question (and I’d
wager, he’s only asked this when I’m with him). I could
go on and on about this point alone, but suffice it to
say that there is immense cultural pressure for women
to limit who they are and sacrifice their personal
identities in the name of family. But it’s important that
as women, we examine our lives and take stock of how
much we invest in ourselves, in our time, our interests,
our goals, our aspirations, and our dreams.
A pitfall we often fall into (myself included) is that we
take better care of other people than we do of ourselves.
That’s why having an identity, separate from being a
spouse or parent, is so important: it’s your lifeline, your
flotation device, your oasis in the desert. Your flotation
device doesn’t have to be anything big, it doesn’t have
to be something you’re passionate about (though, if
you do have something you’re passionate about, go
for it!), it merely has to be something that gives you
joy, something that piques your curiosity. It could be
anything: photography, writing, painting, running,
anthropology, car mechanics, starting a business,
traveling, or learning a new language. Anything you
want. Once you’ve decided on something, begin carving
out space for it. And I deliberately mean carve, because
that means you have to cut something out.
If you’re like me and struggle with the guilt of not
giving your family 100%, then here’s your homework:
Listen to Elizabeth Gilbert’s podcast, Magic Lessons.
Season 1, Episode 1 is about a mom blogger who wants
to write a memoir and devote more time to writing, but
she is struggling with the belief that she’ll somehow
take something away from her family if she does so.
Liz basically gives her (and all listeners) permission to
follow her curiosity and to be a “good enough mom.”
Oh, to be released from the pressure of perfectionism!
To let go of the expectation that we must do it all and
make it look effortless. I don’t know about you, but
that’s damn exciting for me. More than anything, I
want to lead my girls by example. I want them to do
things that give them joy. I don’t want to dissuade them
from being a wife or a mother because there is joy and
beauty in being those things, I just want them to know
that there’s so much more they can be.
MAKEUP ARTISTRY · MICROBLADING
INSPIRED | 17
“My dear old Mum said something back in 1975 that is even more true
for embattled parents today: it is way more important to seek out and
find people who lift you up, support and love you (in all your flawed
wonder), and say, ‘Tomorrow will be a better day, have a hug and your
favourite [beverage of choice]!’”
MADE YOU LOOK!
BY MARJORIE CAMPBELL
I have been gearing up for a return to the workforce
after a nearly ten-year hiatus, during which I was a stayat-home-parent.
If I can impart one piece of wisdom
from my time in the trenches, it is this: never, ever, ever
get involved in an online discussion with a friend based
on a click-bait parenting article they have shared online.
Everyone has fallen for clicking them – they are like the
kryptonite of the Internet. Click-bait articles usually
start with a screaming headline that targets your primal
outrage, and they have several things in common: they
are usually opinion dressed up as fact; they have little
or no verifiable sources or basis in provable fact; they
are an offshoot of an impossible-to-replicate-withoutstaff
celebrity lifestyle or fad; and they have a mean,
judgmental, and/or preachy tone. Following these links
is like traveling down a rabbit hole, delivering you to a
land where all commenters eventually resemble those
kids from Lord of the Flies!
We, as parents, are in a constant state of doubt and
anxiety over whether we are doing this thing right.
Like no other generation before, we have access to an
ocean of resources for advice on childrearing. Back in
the day, the odd book would come out, but your Mum,
smoking her fifth cigarette lit from the last, whilst
driving you in her no-car-seat car, would likely read
some of it, ignore most of it, and get on with her day
being mentally healthier for it. Back then, people just
got on with being insecure about things and didn’t
turn it in to a weekly article, competition, or try to
make everyone else feel bad about doing it differently.
People certainly judged, but they were far more discreet
about it. Ghosting – cutting someone off completely in
a social context – is not new. The virtue in this was that
it was based on people not telling you why you were
not invited to have your gin and tonic with the other
bad mums in the ‘hood – it was just that you didn’t fit
in. You would have known before the ghost and been
relieved that it happened. Eventually, you would find
your group of like-minded parents and all would be
well in the world.
We are the “say everything” generation. You know
what? Don’t. People (myself included) are not very
clever overall. Giving my opinion is not going to change
anything. I now carefully pick and choose who and
how I share my thoughts – and by not sharing every
single thing, I save my blushes. I don’t need everyone to
agree with me, and when I really am incompatible with
someone, I am okay with them drifting out of my life.
My dear old Mum said something back in 1975 that
is even more true for embattled parents today: it is
way more important to seek out and find people who
lift you up, support and love you (in all your flawed
wonder) and say, “Tomorrow will be a better day, have
a hug and your favourite [beverage of choice]”!
You won’t remember those times you got your pithy
point across in the comments section – but you will
remember that friend who showed up with a coffee and
an offer to give you a sanity break from your kid(s). Be
kind to each other and yourself – resist falling for the
click bait, or if you can’t, don’t pass that darkness on.
KIDS DECOR SHOP
Phone: (780) 953-9590
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
Blessed Grove Keepsakes
specializes in making memory
USING BREASTMILK, FIRST HAIR CURL,
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ARE CAPTURED IN A BEAUTIFUL WAY.
Providing professional photography services to
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photographer Rachel Melnychuk specializes in
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Phone: (780) 920-9877
classes workshops parties
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#3 1109 Summerside Drive SW Edmonton, AB
780-469-0280 • firstname.lastname@example.org
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Summerside Drive SW Edmonton, AB
780-469-0280 4cats.com/summerside • email@example.com
BY SHAUNA ROUGHLEY
I’m jerked awake from sleep once again. There is no
slow waking in this house, not anymore. My alarm
clock has barely been used in the last three years. My
days start when my kiddos decide it’s time to rise. Some
days, that’s a glorious sleep in (until 7 am), and some
days, I’m up before the sun.
Most of my days are theirs, so our mornings typically
centre around their moods. If they need to stay in their
pajamas and go play in the sand box first thing in the
morning, that’s what they do; if they need to run and
chase each other and shout at the top of their lungs,
that’s what they do. My coffee constantly goes cold,
I rarely eat my breakfast sitting down, and my plans
revolve around keeping them happy.
Our decision to keep our kids at home with us (only
using occasional child care) has been a choice I will
forever be grateful we made. I love that I get to spend
my days taking my sons on adventures and introducing
them to new experiences. I want to know my boys, and
I want them to remember the time we spend together.
It’s rare that parents can take their kids swimming on a
random Tuesday morning; I feel constantly lucky that
we’re able to.
Trust me, there are days that can’t end soon enough.
Some days, I’m grateful for Netflix and naptime, and
there isn’t enough coffee in the world. Some days, the
endless chatter and questions make my head feel like it’s
going to explode. This parenting gig is never, ever easy,
but most days I try to make it fun.
Most people don’t realize the flip side to trying to run
a business while having your kids at home with you.
My job as a photographer has unconventional hours
in which childcare isn’t available. My parents are my
biggest supporters, and without their help, there is no
way we could do our jobs.
I feel a constant nagging in my head trying to figure
out when to work, balancing the time with my kids and
time away from them, when to book shoots, when to
do the laundry, all the while wondering when the house
is ever going to be clean again. Because with our whole
family home all the time, the messes are endless. Most
days, I choose not to worry about the constant clutter,
the dishes that are always piling up, and the neverending
laundry. The house will be quiet and clean
soon enough, and I know I will miss the bustle. Some
days though, it eats me up and there is a whirlwind of
cleaning. And then it’s messy the very next day.
I’ve considered getting more childcare. I’ve thought
about the need to have more time to work and cultivate
this business, our passion, and the way we pay our
bills. But soon enough the boys won’t want us around
constantly. They will entertain themselves, be off and
busy with their friends, and I will miss these days.
So for now, I’ll put on pots of coffee at 8:00pm to keep
me up for late night work sessions, I’ll guzzle more the
next morning, and I’ll practice my truck sounds and
INSPIRED | 25
INTERVIEW: TARA TREMBLETT
BY ATHENA RAYPOLD, PRESENTED BY PAMPER & PLAY SALON AND SPA
What makes you passionate
about pampering parents?
Parents don’t generally put themselves first. And so we
have supplied them with an outlet where they can go
get their haircut or a beautiful pedicure or a facial or
anything they need, all while their children are being
well taken care of in the supervised playroom.
What is special about
Pamper + Play?
Pamper & Play Salon and Spa is Edmonton’s first and
only premiere salon and spa with a fully supervised
playroom that allows parents to regenerate and take
care of themselves while we watch their little ones. Our
goal is to give parents a space to nurture and replenish
their spirits, without the stress of having children in
tow. Our playroom is fully supervised with a capacity
of four little ones at a time. We change diapers, bottle
feed, and work around nursing schedules!
How do clients respond to
Our parents absolutely love our services! They thank us
when they find out that we even exist and love that we
allow them to go completely out of mommy and daddy
mode while they’re in the building, which gives them
a chance to basically start over and be ready to face
anything after they leave.
What advice can you offer
to parents with babies?
Do not forget about yourself and even though it’s very
difficult to put yourself first, you’re better able to take
care of your family when you practice self-care. I really
love seeing that tired, tired, tired first-time mom come
through the door, and by the time she leaves she has a
fabulous glow, she feels so good about herself, and she
is ready to deal with the next issue that arises.
I was that mom. I have two amazing little boys, Connor
(4) and Cameron (3). One day, when they were one
and two years old, I looked in the mirror and my hair
was horrible, my skin looked tired and gloomy, and
I just didn’t see myself. I thought if I felt that way,
so must other moms, which is why I opened Pamper
& Play Salon and Spa two years ago. Now, we have a
wonderful, amazing clientele, and I really look forward
to what the future brings for us.
INSPIRED | 27
“I noted how small he looked while he slept and how during
the day he seemed so big in comparison to his younger brother.
I tried to think of the last time I had spent any valuable oneon-one
time with him and none came to mind. ”
WHAT TO DO WITH TWO
BY HANNAH HAMILTON
I have a very strong bond with my firstborn. Like a
carefully sewn quilt, we are woven together in the most
intricate and intimate way. He gave me the title of
mother and taught me more about about love than I
ever knew was possible. Our relationship didn’t come
easy though; it was an unplanned pregnancy followed
by a traumatic birth, and a long, dark year suffering
with postpartum depression. We fought for each other,
my son and I, every success we greeted between us was
preceded by a mountain that we had had to climb. The
trust we built together was unspoken but powerful,
it echoed, “Even when it is really, really hard, I am
with you.” He was mine and I was his, and I couldn’t
imagine it any other way.
He was three when I found out I was pregnant with
our second. I clearly remember looking into his big
brown eyes and wondering how exactly our lives would
change by adding another person into our very tight
knit family of three. “When you have a second child,
your love is multiplied, not divided,” I heard this
phrase often when I was pregnant and I always nodded
in agreement. I did believe it, but I wasn’t sure how
exactly I would feel. I couldn’t fathom a multiplied
love, but I knew it must be true. What I wasn’t so sure
about was a multiplied interest. How is it possible to
be fully engaged with both children? How would I
navigate the hours in a day to equally give my attention
to both children, let alone my husband and myself? As
my due date approached, I took my son on fun dates,
frantically trying to soak in our last moments together
before our family dynamic was completely changed.
The birth of my second child was easier, lighter, and
less intense than that of my first. My seasoned body
greeted him with knowing. Within 15 minutes, he was
nursing with ease, something that had always been a
difficult, frustrating task for me and my firstborn.
My mood was light and happy, I felt in control (such
a foreign feeling for me with a newborn baby). I was
not fumbling through the day, emotional and unsure,
desperately wanting to bond with my baby and feeling
completely unable to do so. I thought I had been quite
confident as a first-time mom; however, this time I felt
graceful in mothering. I knew what cries demanded
my attention and which ones I could sleep through. I
was better able to recognize needs, and I cherished the
cuddles a little more because I knew how quickly they
would grow from sleepy infant to busy toddler. There
was a stark difference between my first experience with
infancy and my last. The result of this led me down a
road I hadn’t anticipated, and one that caused me a lot
of guilt in the coming months.
My husband started taking our eldest out on dates
to give me time to rest with the new baby. Because
our children are almost four years apart, this habit
continued on for quite some time. It seemed as though
our family split: my husband and my son on one side,
my baby and I on the other. I appreciated the one-onone
time I was getting with my youngest, I loved how
easy it felt to bond with my new baby. I noticed how
close my husband and my son were becoming, and felt a
mixture of joy and relief that they were growing closer
and giving me space at the same time.
Months went by, and on one particularly hard day that
ended with me quietly stepping into my eldest’s room
late at night to look at his peaceful face, it occurred to
me how much our relationship had changed. I noted
how small he looked while he slept and how during
the day he seemed so big in comparison to his younger
brother. I tried to think of the last time I had spent any
valuable one-on-one time with him and none came to
mind. I marveled how within a few mere months, the
pendulum had completely swung the other way. While
I was once worried I wouldn’t have the space for my
new baby, I now found myself realizing I hadn’t kept
enough space for my eldest.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned in having a second
child is that you must be intentional about your
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
desired family dynamic. It’s common to go through
seasons of life bonding more naturally with one child
than the other. I don’t think this is favouritism or a
reason to feel guilty. The challenge during these times
is to be aware of which child you might have to work
harder for, which one might need more intentional
love, and which one may need more thoughtful time
spent together. I now try to grab onto the small
opportunities that I have during the day to connect
with each member of my family. I’ve noticed that
these connections don’t have to be extravagant dates
that take a lot of time, they can be as simple as reading
books before bed, or conversations while you drive.
After all, it is a cumulation of small, thoughtful
moments that lead to a big, whole hearted life.
Offering a complete circle of support to enhance your
childbearing year. We understand the complexity of readying
for a baby and how busy life can be. We have a team of birth
related professionals, who are trained to assist families by
further preparing them with additional resources, classes and
complimentary services, uniquely setting our practice apart for
families in Alberta.
7903-14 Ave SW
Edmonton, AB.T6X 1H3
Office: (587) 521-2717
Mobile: (780) 708-0615
INSPIRED | 29
INTERVIEW: MELISSA APPLETON
BY ATHENA RAYPOLD, PRESENTED BY APPLETREE PHOTOGRAPHY
“At a birth, the moments after baby has arrived are so full, the
overpowering joy and relief are so tangible.”
What makes you passionate
about birth photography?
Being there for my families, whether it’s a first child
or the seventh. I photograph the moments that are
too easily forgotten with the surge of endorphins and
hormones that make remembering this exciting time
fuzzy. Sometimes that means quietly capturing their
story as it unfolds, and sometimes I’m more present:
holding a hand, grabbing a cold cloth between photos,
or lending support. Sometimes I am hired to capture
a successful VBAC where a momma feels redeemed
by having the birth she dreamed of but was denied
the first time. I capture first time parents that have
struggled with infertility and have finally matched with
a surrogate. Or, sadly, capturing the short life of a baby
who is not able to survive earth side, or a rainbow baby
to a mom who has lost a pregnancy. It’s meaningful
to visually offer a family the beginning of their child’s
What are your favorite
moments to capture?
Emotion. We (as humans) try to be perfect, we try to
hold everything together and have order and control
over every aspect of our lives including our emotions.
At a birth, the moments after baby has arrived are so
full, the overpowering joy and relief are so tangible.
Moms often drop their heads back and close their eyes
while clutching their new babe to their chest and you
can see the emotions playing over her face. I often hold
my breath (and some tears) in these magical moments
and I can almost hear them mentally shouting,” I did
Why do families choose
I hope it’s because they trust me, and connect with me,
and have fallen in love with my work. I think birth is
the most vulnerable and intimate style of photography;
my families are not only trusting me to capture images
and memories of their child, but also their rebirth
into someone new: a first time mother or father, or
expanding their family to add another child. It is not a
responsibility I take lightly.
How do clients respond to
My families are so excited to see their images and see
their child’s story from another angle, remembering the
fleeting moments they missed or forgot. I am humbled
by their gratitude when they express their joy to me.
Most parents would say the day their child was born was
the best day of their life; it was a day where everything
changed. I am truly blessed to witness these moments.
Some births do not go as planned, and moms have
told me the photos are both palpable and therapeutic.
One mom said after a difficult birth that ended in an
emergency c-section, “my photos helped me to reframe
my experience in a more positive light.”
What advice can you offer to
Don’t be afraid to reach out to a birth photographer, ask
questions and really determine if you want this “one of
a kind” experience captured. Many parents are hesitant
to be photographed during such a raw, vulnerable, and
admittedly graphic experience, but we can customize
your session so that it suits your comfort level. For some
that means I meet them for an hour in the first 48 hours
of the baby’s life capturing where he or she was born but
not the birth itself. For others, it’s an above-the-waist
session, shooting only the emotions and connections
between the parents and their supports and the new
baby. And still others want me to photograph everything
from every angle and we’ll cull the images they aren’t
comfortable with. I am here to tell their story in a way
that best represents them and means the most to them.
INSPIRED | 31
“Diapers are one thing you can’t compromise on and wipes are
multi purpose: sticky hands, spills, and other surfaces that you’re
not too sure have been wiped ever.”
TRAVELLING WITH BABY
BY CHRISTINE BRUCKMANN
Whether you’re travelling for the first time or are a
seasoned traveller, travelling with a baby definitely
requires some preparation and patience. Following
these simple tips will help make travelling with your
Use Ziploc Bags
Packing clothes in Ziploc Bags is a great way to organize
for travel. Simply get some large or extra large bags and
a permanent marker. Pack one outfit in each bag and
label it accordingly. Don’t forget to pack extra outfits
and put a few in your diaper bag for easy access! Ziploc
Bags are also perfect to have on hand to store clothes if
you’ve had to deal with a poop explosion or some other
sort of clothing mishap. Need to make an emergency
diaper change? They work great to contain the diaper.
Empty Ziploc Bags barely take up any room in your bag
and if you do have to store something in them you can
just seal it up and deal with it later.
Drinks + Snacks
If you’re little one is on formula, make sure you pack
enough bottles, formula, and water for the whole trip.
Having the formula pre-measured in easy to open
containers helps to make the process more convenient.
For the babies eating solids, pack baby food and other
snacks such as cheerios, crackers, fruit cups, cheese
strings, as well as bibs, a Sippy cup and spoons. If
they’re old enough, pack a few treats too as you never
know when they might come in handy!
Diapers + Wipes
Whether you’re on a plane or driving to your
destination, you do not want to be in the position of
not having enough diapers or wipes! Think of how
many diapers you usually use in a day and then pack
more. Diapers are one thing that you can’t compromise
on and wipes are multi purpose: sticky hands, spills,
and other surfaces that you’re not too sure have been
wiped ever. Wipes come in handy for a lot of things,
not just diaper changes. Also don’t forget a change pad!
Entertainment + Comfort
Small rattles, teething toys, board books, an iPad,
blankets, and soothers are just some things to
remember. Consider bringing a new toy or two that
you can take out during the trip – especially if times
are getting a little tough. There are many great apps
that you can download onto your device that are baby
friendly, and having comfort items on hand can help
make an unfamiliar or out of routine situation a little
Baby Carriers + Strollers
A baby carrier is a great way to get your little one from
point A to point B, especially if you are travelling
alone. They are easy to store in your carry-on bag when
not in use, and can also come in handy when you’re on
a holiday and exploring, not to mention if you have to
use the washroom! Strollers are also a must if you are
travelling for extended periods of time. A compact or
umbrella stroller is ideal because they are light and easy
to pack at the gate. A stroller can be a lifesaver when
you’ve spent the day exploring and your little one needs
to doze off.
You never know what you are going to experience with
your little one. Pain relievers and a change of clothes
for both of you, teething drops, birth certificates, and
passports are important. If you are flying, make sure
you pack it in your carry on bag, and if you’re driving,
make sure passports are easily accessible.
For air travel, always be sure to check with the airline
to find out their guidelines and rules are for travelling
with a baby.
Remember you’ve got this and enjoy your trip!
Volume 02 Fall 2016 Issue BABY
Art Supplies and Workshops
4 Cats Summerside 780.469.0280
Baby Equipment Rentals
One Tiny Suitcase 587.784.0212
Makeup Artistry and Microblading 780.907.9714
Pamper & Play Salon and Spa 780.440.7529
Full Circle Birth Collective 587.521.2717
Landmark Doulas 587.673.0365
Entrepreneaur Moms Now 250.616.3444
Moms Earning More 780.436.6272
Billy’s Detail 780.975.2225
Hot Mama Fitness 780.298.5888
Shelley Cronin Design 780.235.1800
Appletree Photography 780.953.5802
Bille Lang Photography 780.263.2722
Jessica Leanne Photography 780.940.5579
Lorraine Mare Fotography 780.690.0945
Luciddream Photography Inc. 780.919.6691
Pinkstar Photography Inc.
Then Now and Forever
Edmonton Area Family Doulas 780.966.6705
Full Circle Postpartum Doula Care 587.521.2717
Park City Doulas 780.446.8224
Modern Mama St. Albert North Edmonton
Modern Mama Edmonton
Enjoy Life, Mom’s Group 780.297.8510
Connections Family Travel 780.668.8292
Website Content and Blog Writing
Athena Raypold Freelance Writer
The Ruby Thursday Collective
QuikCard 780.426.7526 ext 2243
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House of Posie
INSPIRED | 33