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M
IT'S
BETTER
Gender travelers share their stories and tips on how to
succeed together on their gender journey.
TOGETHER
Y O U R G U I D E T O Y O U R G E N D E R J O U R N E Y
Sonder
MAY 2017 | P200

My Gender Expedition
By: Alyssa Quiaoit
As a child, I was always sheltered from
The “cool kids” bullied a lot of the kids that
certain things and worldly influences. My family
they thought were “weird” or anyone that they
is very close-knit and I always grew up close to
thought would be fun to make fun of. Luckily, I
my cousins and other relatives, so they all played
was never one of those kids and I just flew under
a huge role with who I am today. Our family was
their radar, but I felt really bad for the kids that
also very religious and conservative and in
they targeted. I disliked the bullies, but a part of
addition to that, my parents were also very strict
me was always curious of what it would be like
and overprotective of me and my sister when we
to be part of their “cool” clique. But in order to
were growing up. Since I was so sheltered from
blend in in school, I had to wear certain clothes,
a lot of things, I became a little spoiled and I
act and talk a certain way. I felt pressured to
became too dependent and overly attached to
succumb to the herd mentality, which I think
my family. I was scared to try new things without
developed in me this people-pleasing attitude.
my family there and I never did anything that
The only good thing about grade school was
was out of my comfort zone.
that I was able to make friends who were just
like me, which is also a bad thing since they
When I entered grade school, I was the
were quiet and timid and scared to leave their
timid, meek and shy girl. It was the first time I
comfort zone.
was going to be on my own and the idea of
having to adjust and make friends was a scary
I was finally able to escape grade school,
thing for me. You could say I was like a
not unscathed of course. I came out of there
wallflower; I preferred to blend in and be
with some self-esteem issues and my ever
invisible. I was also very self-conscious of how I
present fear of leaving my comfort zone. But
looked. Generally I was just a super awkward girl,
then that changed when I entered high school. I
like a fish out of water-a girl who was clearly not
finally got a chance to become popular when I
in her element. I guess it also didn’t help that I
befriended the cool girls in my school. I guess it
didn’t really get along with a lot of the kids in
was all surreal for me that they would even
school. Most of them were your typical,
notice me. Unfortunately, they were also kind of
pretentious spoiled rich kids (waaaaay worse
mean to some other girls they thought were
than me) with a common case of the superiority
weird and sometimes I would go along with
complex.
their teasing. I felt terrible that I finally got what I
wanted, but at the cost of becoming like one of
the bullies I disliked when I was in grade school.

OVERCOMER

It was also during this time that I was
confused, lost, and rebelled against my parents
over something I never thought could happen
to our “perfect” family. During these difficult
times, I leaned more on my friends than my
family and looked for love and validation from
them. I seemed happy but I was an absolute
mess on the inside. But thank God, during my
senior year in high school, I went on a school
retreat that was life-changing for me. It was
then that I truly surrendered my life to God and
it was honestly the best thing that has ever
happened to me. It was also during my senior
year that I started becoming more open to
people and new experiences, from becoming
class president and prom queen, joining the
varsity, and even finding romance (which
unfortunately died out when I entered college).
Now that I’m down to my last week in
college, I could honestly say that college has
been the best years of my life and has had the
biggest impact on me. It was here that I really
felt and believed that I actually am a strong and
independent woman, who is capable of
conquering things I never knew I could do. I
made plenty of amazing friends, I joined the
debate circle, I won Miss Behsciyad, I finally got
to experience what it’s like to get drunk, I got to
experience going home at 3 am, and all the
crazy things that’s happened to me these past
four years. All those were things that my grade
school and high school self would cower away
from and it’s crazy to think that I was able to
conquer those fears and issues. College has
brought out this whole new side of me, and I
even think it has brought out the best in me. I
am no longer the same girl that felt bound to
following the crowd or the girl who felt like she
needed to find her self-worth in people. I can
just be ME. And even though I don’t have it all
figured out, I’m still excited for the greatest
expedition of my life, which is exploring more
of who I am and who I can be.

GENDER
MY
JOURNEY
do I start? How do I even begin writing
Where
tale that I have always been so interested
the
myself? My gender, the roles that I have
about
and the particular type of road I have
taken
to venture into, how would I write
decided
Well, maybe it’s more than just right and
them?
cross road. But yes, it was confusion
another
brought me here and dissonance it was
that
fueled my inner being to finally let go of
that
doubts, fears and apprehensions and just
the
find the answers to the queries that have
finally
me bugging all these years.
left
a young age of three, I have a gut feeling in
At
depths of my being that I am different from
the
else. Clearly, I don’t belong to the
everybody
of girls just because my physique and all
group
externalities that come with it are totally
the
from theirs. Girls had long hair and
different
skirts and dresses. Meanwhile, I had a
wear
hair and was always wearing pants and
short
told that pink was a color I was forbidden of
was
Indeed, I should be part of the opposite
liking.
the boys; I do belong, if you were to look on
sex,
outside. But on the inside, there’s an eerie
the
through your own personal struggles
Navigating
never easy. My family is composed of my
was
Daddy who’s always out of the country
valiant
to the nature of his occupation so my
due
Mom and my four incredible sisters
affectionate
my companions most of the time. Because
were
this very feminine atmosphere at home, I
of
more comfortable hanging out and
became
friendships with girls. This evidently
building
when I started entering school. The
manifested
and ease can be explained by the
comfort
when it comes to interests and
similarities
in the field, running and playing video
out
that most boys would do with their free
games
School was the real battle and it was a
High
to be reckon with. Belonging to certain
force
was basically the norm and you wouldn’t
cliques
to be seen eating lunch alone on your
want
The divide between boys and girls
table.
and my feeling of indifference
intensified
It took me more than 3 years to find the
quest.
that I treasure the most in High School.
people
B y : K e n t O c t a v a
to begin with an honest question,
proper
truly I am confused and situated at yet
because
I am more of a talker, watching
hobbies.
dramas and reading books than going
television
time.
to a whole new level of extremity.
escalated
a bunch of people was an absolute
Finding
at that time that’s quite unexplainable.
feeling
a very early age, I discovered confusion. The
At
desire to belong but simply cannot.

free spirit

n t e r i n g t h e U n i v e r s i t y w a s
E
r u l y a k a l e i d o s c o p e , a n
t
x p e d i t i o n t h a t I h a v e n e v e r
e
h o u g h t I ’ l l u n d e r t a k e b u t w a s
t
e f i n i t e l y t h e b e s t t i m e o f m y
d
i f e . I t w a s t h e p h a s e o f m y l i f e
l
h e n I h a v e n e v e r f e l t m o r e
w
r e e a n d c o n f i d e n t a b o u t
f
y s e l f . T h e c u l t u r e t h a t U P
m
m b i b e s o p e n e d m y m i n d a n d
i
e a r t t o t h e p o s s i b i l i t y o f
h
e i n g a c c e p t e d f o r w h o I a m .
b
t m o t i v a t e d m e t o g o b e y o n d
I
o r d e r s a n d f r e e d m y s e l f f r o m
b
h e c l o s e t t h a t c o n s t r a i n s m e
t
r o m e x p r e s s i n g t h e r e a l m e .
f
o l l e g e w a s a t i m e o f f i n d i n g
C
r i e n d s o f g o l d , o f f a l l i n g i n
f
f d i s c o v e r i n g w h o I r e a l l y a m
o
n t h e m o s t h o n e s t m a n n e r i n
i
h i s w o r l d o f f a c a d e s a n d
t
l l u s i o n s .
i
n m y t w e n t y y e a r s o f
I
a n d e r i n g t h r o u g h t h e w i l d
w
r b a n j u n g l e s , s u r f i n g a l o n g
u
h e w a v e s o f t h e j u d g m e n t a l
t
c e a n a n d f l y i n g a c r o s s t h e s k y
o
f s t e r e o t y p e s , I f o u n d a n o a s i s
o
h a t i n v i g o r a t e d m e w i t h
t
t r e n g t h a n d h o p e t o c a r r y o n
s
x c i t e d a n d j o y f u l . I c a n s a y
e
h a t I h a v e g o n e t h r o u g h a l o t .
t
h e r e w e r e o b s t a c l e s t h a t h a v e
T
o b e s u r p a s s e d , b o u l d e r s t h a t
t
e r e n e c e s s a r y t o b e m o v e d
w
n d t h e r e w e r e t r u t h s t h a t
a
e r e m e a n t t o b e d i s c e r n e d . I
w
m K e n t a n d I c a n p r o u d l y s a y
a
h a t I f i n a l l y b e l o n g , w e l c o m e
t
o m y h a v e n , t h e L G B T
t
o v e a n d b r e a k i n g o n e ’ s h e a r t ,
l
f b e i n g o p e n t o m y f a m i l y a n d
o
n d f i n i s h w a s h a s t o b e d o n e .
a
h a v e n e v e r f e l t m o r e f u l f i l l e d ,
I
C o m m u n i t y .
M Y G E N D E R J O U R N E Y

inside and out
Beautiful

GENDER
MY
CRUISE
2, 1996 – the day a pale and droopy-eyed
August
girl was born. She is 20 now. When she was 5,
baby
remembers going with her pregnant mother to
she
Sto. Niño festival. Her mother was praying to be
the
with a son this time. Her prayer was
granted
A cute baby boy was born and everyone
answered.
happy. Fast forward to the time when the girl
was
curious and asked her mother, “If I were born a
got
boy, would you have my little brother?”. The mother
by that incident, I already thought that a lot
Just
definitely change if I were born a boy. Aside
would
my younger brother no longer existing, the
from
and rules that are taught and applied to me
values
also differ as a reflection of the gendered
would
of my environment. When I was younger, I
culture
being so conscious as to how I should
remember
or behave – my grandparents were always
look
me out as a child. They point out that I am a
calling
and that I should act and speak meekly and
girl
from men; that I should not be playing
attention
men alone. Aside from that, I was enrolled in a
with
school for 11 years where I only had female
Catholic
and where we were taught about
classmates
chastity, and purity. I was clueless and
simplicity,
I simply followed what they taught me
compliant.
fully understanding why they should be
without
done.
of that, I learned to repress my sexuality. As
Because
woman, I learned that having crushes already
a
being a flirt. I learned not to express interest
meant
men who like me because I should be “hard to
in
I am a temptation to men and so I should cover
that
myself and act in a way that no one would notice
up
I learned to be afraid. I learned to hide myself. I
me.
confined within the hypocrisy of the system I
was
I was 4, or 5, or 6, I could not remember, my
When
and vulnerability were taken advantage
innocence
What did I get from that experience? I was told to
of.
guys because they will be guys. I was told to
avoid
more fabric. I was told to restrain myself so as
wear
to provoke men. I was told to stay at home if I
not
no business outside. I was given curfews. I
have
confused about men – I am attracted to
became
my teenage years in High School, I could not
During
stable friendships or relationships with
develop
Sunset M A Y 2 0 1 7
by Sandra Libunao
I learned that sexual desires are impure and
get”.
having them would mean being dirty. I learned
that
replied, “Probably not anymore.”.
belonged to. I was unhappy.
them, but at the same time I am afraid of them.
all the time; that I should dress decently,
gracefully
and ladylike but not in the way that will invite
pretty
There were men who approached me and
them.
to woo me, but I would always be afraid of
tried
doubt their intentions, and reject them even
them,
I really like them. I was feeling so conflicted.
though
I was miserable at best.

in college, I noticed that I have
However,
more open and happy about who I
become
and what I want. The open and accepting
am
in UP, especially the friends that I had,
culture
me out of my shell. I was allowed to
pulled
however I want, speak without worrying
wear
censors or being judged, behave
about
too much caution, like whoever I
without
and just be a woman. I became
want,
I have already brought out my
empowered.
the entirety of my gender cruise so far, I
In
that my environment played such a
believe
role. From an innocent and clueless
significant
I became an overly-conscious, “Maria
girl,
façade, and then I became a
Clara”-esque
but empowered woman who now has
flawed
can freely express myself and my gender
I
thinking too much what others
without
say. I have yet to fully recover from the
would
that was brought to me but I am
conditioning
to say that I am actively trying to
proud
myself – I explore myself and my
improve
more, I socialize with others more, I
interests
not as afraid of being myself and making
am
and I influence my previous
mistakes,
towards more progressive
environment
Sunset M A Y 2 0 1 7
flaws. I became free. I became happy.
idea of who she is and what she wants.
better
am now more confident and happy because
I
thinking.

CONFIDENCE
PROBLEMS?
1. Know yourself
2. Love yourself
3. Do not focus too much on what others would think
4. Surround yourself with reassuring people
like? What are you good at? What are the things that
so, you will have better chances of succeeding in
Sunset M A Y 2 0 1 7
by Sandra Libunao
PROBLEM!
NO
Do you often find yourself doubting your abilities,
1. Know yourself. The first thing in achieving
confidence is to know who you are. What do you
strengths, intellect, and beauty? Do you often wish
that you were somebody else? If you do, worry not
because you are not alone! In fact, having
are easy for you to learn? What are your flaws? How
confidence issues is quite common to everyone –
are you going to enhance your flaws? How do you
whether you are a male, a female, or a part of the
identify yourself? You have to focus on knowing who
LGBT community, no matter what age you are or
you really are because that way, you can better
status you come from, confidence can be an
gauge yourself and your abilities. Knowing yourself
intractable quality to attain. Fortunately, confidence
would mean engaging in activities you perceive you
issues are not chronic. You can actually do
can manage and avoiding activities that you are not
something to gain confidence! Here are the tips in
so good at or you are not passionate about. In doing
order for you to become a more confident gender
traveler.
your activities which will build up your confidence
and at the same time, you will not plunge yourself
into activities and situations that you know you
could not yet handle – thus saving you from
inevitable risks and breakage of confidence and
morale.

2. Love yourself. After knowing who you are and
betterment. You do not need to change yourself
have. Be honest with yourself, love yourself, and all
yourself, the things you do, the things you say, and
improvement, and you would develop more healthy
3. Do not focus too much on what others would
think. It is important to note that no matter what
scared; unaware of what
confidence. Just be true
love. Be happy with what
Sunset M A Y 2 0 1 7
what you are good at as well as what you are not so
you do, you can never please everyone. You may be
good at, learn to love and accept all of them – they
are a part of you! Make them an instrument for self-
lacking the confidence to get out there and be who
you are because you are afraid that people would
entirely – you just have to make do with what you
judge you negatively. Do not mind them. Whatever
you do, there will always be people who will look
your good characteristics will shine through – you
down on you or judge you. If you keep on minding
and being affected about
would not even have to think about it, trust me.
Loving and accepting yourself would also highlight
what others would think,
you would just be left
your best characteristics. Also, when you love
there stagnant and
how you interpret your surroundings would reflect
that love – you would do your tasks more
to do and lacking
passionately because you are motivated to live, you
would take criticisms more constructively because
to yourself. Do what you
you know you have so much potential for
you are doing. What
and stable relationships with others because you are
matters is that you are
happy with yourself and
confident in yourself, you appreciate yourself, and
you know your worth – just as much as you know
you are not hurting
others’ worth as well.
anyone.

started”. Confidence is essential in people’s success and happiness. As gender travelers, it
Sunset M A Y 2 0 1 7
4. Surround yourself with reassuring people. Sure,
you should not focus too much on what others
would think. However, you would also need people
to provide you both reassurance and reality check.
Let us face it – there will be times when our
perceptions would be distorted. Our confidence
may be at an all-time low where we think we
cannot do something that we actually can. These
people will help redirect your thinking and attitude
into something more realistic. They will remind you
about what you can do and how beautiful and
valuable you are as a person. They will make you
genuinely feel better about yourself because what
they say are true and they are also not afraid to
point out your flaws because they know that it will
make you a better person.
As quoted by Marcus Garvey, “With confidence, you have won before you even have
is our confidence that enables us to take on the roles that we laid for ourselves, and it is
confidence that will make us express who really are, what we want, what we can do to
get what we want, our confidence will carry us into success and happiness throughout
the entire process. Now gender traveler, chin up, bust out, and confidently sashay away to
your gender journey.

TIPS FOR
BEAUTY
GENDER
BETTER
Sunset M A Y 2 0 1 7
by Sandra Libunao
EXPRESSION
Beauty is extremely important – not just
because we want other people to look at us
and admire us, but because beauty is a
manifestation of self-appreciation! As
gender travelers, beauty is gender
expression! It is through our appearance
that we express ourselves and give others a
glimpse of who we are. Beauty is essential
because it brings out our feelings and
identity; beauty will always say something
about us – and we want everyone to see the
beauty of our inner selves radiate by also
being beautiful on the outside. With that in
check, here are some tips on how to look
even more beautiful:

Sunset | 2 3 S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 9
2. Chapped lips are a no-no. Again, regardless
1. Practice a good skincare routine. Having a clear,
glowing, and radiant skin is probably the barest
if you are a male or a female, having chapped
lips are painful, unpleasant to look at, and
necessity to physical beauty, regardless if you are a
male or a female. A clear and radiant skin manifests
uninviting for a kiss. Make sure to slather some
youth, freshness, and cleanliness. It shows that you
lip balm or petroleum jelly on your lips every
night to keep them moist and luscious. Also
are put together, that you are not letting yourself go
despite of all the stress in your gender journey. In
bring them with you for those extra cold and dry
moments. Like they say, if the eyes are the
achieving and maintaining a clear and radiant skin, a
skincare routine must be followed: be sure to wash
window to the soul, then the lips are the window
to passionate kisses – so make sure your lips are
your face every morning and every night with a
cleanser that works well with your skin. After
always ready when the time comes. You would
washing, use a moisturizer of your preference to
not want to blow away a good kiss encounter by
bring some hydration back to your skin that the
having chapped lips, do you?
cleanser might have stripped off. If you have oily face,
always bring oil-blotting paper or powder with you to
avoid oil and dirt build up that could lead to acne.

Sunset M A Y 2 0 1 7
3. Put on
some
makeup
This step is entirely up to you. You may or may not do it; it
does not really matter as long as you feel beautiful and
confident about yourself. Before going further, it is
important to note that there are people who like using
makeup because it is fun, it boosts their self-confidence,
it emphasizes their assets, and it helps them express their
gender. Meanwhile, there are also people who do not like
using makeup because makeup requires skill, it is high-
maintenance, and not putting on makeup is also an
expression of their gender. Just as much as we should
learn to respect various genders, we should also learn to
respect people’s preferences when it comes to putting
on makeup – more specifically, men should not be
judged for liking and wearing makeup while women
should not be pressured to put on makeup. Now that we
have our disclaimers out of the way, here are some tips
about how to do your makeup au naturale style:

MAKEUP 101
a. Define eyebrows. In this time and age, it is as if people
could go away with not wearing any makeup except for the
brows because the brows shape and define the frame of the
face. In creating natural-looking browse, grab a brow powder
and lightly brush the powder on your brows, following its
natural shape and pattern.
b. Put on base makeup. Be it primer, foundation, BB
cream, CC cream, etc., a good base makeup would even out
the skin tone and fill in the pores so that the skin would look
smoother and the other face makeup such as blush and
bronzer would adhere better and last throughout the day.
c. Put on blush/bronzer. Putting on blush, bronzer, or both
would give back the color, warmth, and definition to your
skin. You can also use the bronzer to contour the shape of
your face to make it look more hollow and feminine if you
would like.
d. Lengthen and volumize eyelashes. Using a mascara,
make your eyes pop and look awake by brushing it through
your lashes. Having thick and long lashes also adds a little bit
of effortless sexiness to your look especially if you are feeling
a little friskier.
e. Paint them puckers. Lastly, use a lipstick of your choice
to finish up your look. Lips can tell a lot about how you are
feeling. If you are feeling sweet and feminine, opt for a light
pink shade. If you are feeling wild and dangerous, wear a
dark red shade. If you are feeling flirty, but you want to be
subtle about it, wear a nude shade. Indeed, colors are fun
and meaningful!

4. Spritz
on some
scent
How a person smells also affects that person’s beauty
and gender expression. There are scents that are simply
clean and fresh and more androgynous. There are also
scents that are sweet and innocently feminine. There are
scents that are cool and sporty and masculine. There are
also scents that are seductive – there are seductive
feminine scents and seductive masculine scents. In trying
to be beautiful, and in gender expression, a scent can
actually say a lot.

covered. I understood where my mom was
struggle. But then I realized it’s not just a
society, especially in conservative cultures. I’m sure
Fashion and
Gender: What
does your
clothing style say
about your
Gender?
Written by: Alyssa Quiaoit
As a teenage girl, my mom would always
tell me to avoid wearing short skirts or shorts
because it was safer for a girl to be more
coming from, but it was just saddening to be
reminded that women have to go through this
woman’s issue, but even men and other genders
go through this issue too. Fashion has always
been a gender binary, either you shop in the
women’s section or the men’s section, either you
buy from a women’s size or a men’s size.
For some heterosexual males, maybe
wearing pink or floral prints are seen as girly, or
wearing really tight jeans were labeled as gay.
Because God forbid that straight men would
ever like something as “feminine” as fashion; all
they should be interested in are sports, cars and
women. Very masculine stuff.
"Fashion has always been a
gender binary"
The LGBT+ also have to deal with the
constant pressure of how they should dress in
there are plenty of transgenders who feel
uncomfortable in having to wear clothes that don’t
match with their gender identity; all because there’s
a dress code that needs to be followed or for fear of
ridicule and discrimination. A lot still needs to be
done in this area, especially with so many stories
about transgenders not being allowed to enter
certain places because of how they look.

want. Your clothing style should be a
SLAY
FASHION
gender. In the end, just be confident and slay
Aside from the expectation to be
But even though there are times that you
more modest in clothing. Some women
may have to compromise in what you wear,
are also required or expected to wear
society will never be able to dictate your
certain clothes, such as dresses and
skirts because it is seen as more
whatever outfit you wear.
feminine and appropriate for a woman.
Because according to society women
That’s actually the only tip you’ll need to
need to wear feminine clothes to be
be your confident and fashionable self.
considered attractive.
Gender is not solely defined by clothes and
appearances, but what you make it to be.
Well this article is to give you some tips
Because fashion would never be able to fully
on how to dress appropriately for your
capture the fluidity and complexity of gender
gender:
and the amazingness that is you.
Tip #1: Wear whatever the hell you
form of self-expression, and not
something that defines who you are
and what your gender may be. I could
be a straight woman who doesn’t care
about wearing dresses or being girly,
and yes, still be into dudes. Or you
could be a straight male and be into
wearing pink, floral prints and even
wear skirts [Look up Jaden Smith’s
gender-bending style because he can
totally rock a skirt].

GENDER AND MEDIA: USING
YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS
IN GENDER EXPRESSION
By: Alyssa Quiaoit
Why is social media such a huge part of
Or a gay couple may be able to post cute
our lives today? Maybe for some it’s to stay
couple photos of themselves, but are unable
updated on the current events and to follow
to hold hands and kiss in public for fear of
their favorite celebrities. Maybe for others it’s
judgment. No one should have to feel judged
to stay connected with friends and loved
for expressing their gender. And whatever
ones. And let’s admit it, social media is also a
their reasons may be, everyone is entitled to
great way to stalk your crush. But probably
have control on how they want society to see
the best thing about social media is that it
them. Social media has this protective veil
becomes an extension of ourselves. A
that the real world doesn’t always have, but
platform where we can truly express
these platforms gives us numerous
ourselves, to show others who we really are,
opportunities, in many different ways, to
or maybe for some, to show a version of
display ourselves however we want to. For
ourselves that we wish to be. Yes, there’s
some people, this may be an escape from
always a caveat to using social media, but
realism, and it may be the only platform they
this isn’t one of those articles. Social media is
have to be themselves.
a great avenue where we can control the
image we put out and maybe even create a
2. Social media helps us find other people
whole new persona in the cyber world. It has
like us or who are going through the same
become a powerful tool in self-expression,
thing. It’s always comforting to know that
more specifically in our gender expression.
there are people out there who share the
same experiences as us or who went through
1. Social media allows us to be ourselves
the same struggles. Some of the people you
or even a version of ourselves that we want
meet on social media can become like a
others to see. Yes, there will always be
support system for people who may not
bullies, haters and trolls online, but
necessarily have one in real life. Maybe a
nonetheless, it’s a free space for us to not
closeted gay guy might find comfort and
feel as restricted by society. Like how a
courage in other people’s coming out stories.
transgender woman may be able to take a
Some may even use social media to come
photo of herself in a dress and post it on her
out as LGBT+. In addition to that, it's always
Instagram, but she may not feel able to
easier to talk to people who have gone
freely put on the same dress and walk down
through the same thing, because they’ll be
the street.
the ones who will understand you best.

3. Social media can be a platform for discussion.
Even though we live in a more accepting and
inclusive society, there’s no denying that there
are still plenty of bashers online. Freedom of
expression does not equate to hateful speech
towards certain groups of people and
bullying/discriminating/objectifying people. So
when these people start posting hateful and
sexist comments online, it’s our job to speak out
against it. A common scenario would be when
a girl posts a sexy photo of herself, there will
definitely be plenty of comments about how
slutty she is or even about “fucking her” and all
these other nasty comments. We shouldn’t just
ignore such sexist comments, but we should
use it to spark discussions on the issue. Allowing
those comments to slide will just make other
people think it’s okay to say those things and is
just further perpetuating the patriarchy we live
in. Social media is a powerful tool that can
reach millions of people, which is why it should
be used to shed light on important gender
issues, such as the gender wage gap, rape,
domestic violence, etc. When people start to
notice these issues and come together to solve
them, we will be able to see real change and
real action towards a more gender accepting
society.
We use social media every single day that
sometimes it’s easy to forget what a powerful
tool it is. Social media allows all people,
regardless of orientation, race or gender, an
opportunity to express their own unique selves
in whatever way they are most comfortable. It
allows us to find like-minded people and to find
comfort and support in one another. But more
importantly, it becomes a platform for
something that is even bigger than ourselves. It
is an avenue for us to come together to fight
against gender issues and gender
misconceptions. Hopefully, more people will use
social media to give a voice to those who are
silenced and ignored in society.

TWISTING
Romance
IDENTITY
Gender
Ever since I was in High School, I have always
been so fascinated about love stories. The tales
you read in novels written by Nicholas Sparks
or films like The Notebook starred by Ryan
Gosling and Rachel McAdams would make you
think that life would complete its ever majestic
meaning by finding that someone whom you
would love with all your heart, mind and soul
and who would love you back as much and ‘till
do you part. I was enchanted by this kind of
notion while growing up and would always
have a dream to finally know what love is, to
feel the sensation it brings about to one’s body
and to finally say the three words to the person
I would wish to share my entire life with. Until
it finally did happen, meeting the boy in the
most unexpected time and for all the most
bizarre reasons.

school. When I finally engaged
experience, from the jolt that my
were once the perfect duo, a couple
We
shared the same dreams and
who
in life. A partnership that was
passions
forged to stand against
supposedly
and hurricanes. However, not all
odds
stories end in a happy note and as
love
old yet still very relevant quotation
the
“People come and go”, we parted
goes,
and went to our own separate
ways
Even though things did not work
paths.
as much as I would have wanted
fine
imagined it to be, never once in my
and
did I regret that I grabbed and
life
that opportunity to be in a
seized
for there were so many
relationship
that I have learned not only
things
LOVE
GOES
BEYOND
IS
WHAT
first relationship was another
My
in my gender journey. It was
milestone
inevitable pit stop to be landed and
an
before I could finish my journey
visited
finally reach my destination. The
and
has proven a lot of things
relationship
myself. First, I was able to truly
about
that I get attracted to the same
confirm
This was a question that I was
sex.
curious of knowing because of
always
complexity that it would entail and
the
issues that I would stumble upon if
the
leads to the second realization,
This
are issues that I have yet to fix
there
myself like insecurity, confidence
upon
maturity. There were moments in
and
relationship when I was too
the
of myself to my partner, I
comparative
so pressured to portray a
felt
that would impress
characterization
and would make me worthy of
people
respect and admiration. I have
their
that there is no way to interact
learned
other people by being yourself,
with
your true colors,
showing
honesty by displaying
demonstrating
flaws and weaknesses and the
your
of respect that you expect from
kind
Eighteen was the age when I have
finally encountered the force that
drives people out of their sanity.
Falling in love is something that you
would never understand unless you
yourself have gone through it.
There are small details that usually
meant nothing before that now
means everything like the voice of a
fellow human being, the smile that
goes along with his laughter and
it were to happen.
even the simplest of statements
like a greeting in the morning or a
goodbye after a long tiring day at
about love but also about myself.
myself into a relationship, there
were more to discover and
body experiences from the strand
of my hair down to my toenails
whenever I see him, the countless
of hours over the phone talking
about the tales I have never wished
to discuss with anyone, endless
laughter over simple funny things
to going out for dates and
exploring the restaurants and
people will come naturally.
cuisines we’ve always wanted to try.
KNOWN.

knows no gender
"Love
for all these and
love would reasons,
win." always
unbelievable. The words of
self-discovery. Love observes
The third thing that I can take
away from this experience
was truth and honesty. The
relationship opened the
opportunity for me to finally
discuss to my family the other
side of me which I think they
are already familiar of but has
always been hidden under
dubious whispers. For the first
time in forever, I had the
bravery to smash the truth
and share to my sisters my
true being. The result was
love and encouragement
were more than enough to
sustain me with power and
confidence that I have place
in the world, that my
non-conforming gender and
my unconventional
difference will never be
barriers as to what I can do
and who I could be someday.
Relationships are avenues for
growth and development. It
is something that I think
almost all people would find
themselves in no matter what
they do. It is a field of
self-exploration and
no boundaries; it goes
beyond what is known. Love
knows no gender and for all
these reasons, love would
always win.
Issue 27 | 234

will never run out of doing
You
for the very first time. First
something
to tell someone a secret you have
time
keeping since forever. First time to
been
in a relationship after having a crush
be
that boy since you first bumped into
on
in the cafeteria. First kiss you have
him
under the spell of the magical
shared
and the very first time you
moonlight
said that you are finally ready to
have
Sex,
Gender
The City
&
feel each other.

article would contain 2 snippets of sex confessions
This
people around the college. They would be sharing
of
action and how they reached nirvana when
pounding
fluids have finally come into an explosion.
the
was a tiring week. There were so many things that
It
to be done, papers to write and exams to be
had
that would definitely excrete all forms of
Something
from my system. Unexpectedly, one of my
stress
decided to throw a party in celebration of her
friends
and so I went home drunk. Despite having all
birthday
fun of dancing and drinking, there is still a part of
the
that craves for more, something that couldn’t be
me
easily thrown off by a solitary up and down touch
just
so I did my own hunting, finding someone that
and
satisfy my cravings. I went online and found the
would
who would give me one of the best sexcapades I
guy
ever had. He invited me over to his place. He
have
the lights into a dim, we finally kissed, licked
turned
other and finally did the routine. I was on top all
each
way, going inside and out, kissing him every now
the
into bliss. What a volcanic eruption have we both
burst
I showered and finally bid my goodbye with
made,
- Alex, 21
couldn’t imagine doing what I have done. As of this
I
I feel like some sort of rebellion is finally
moment,
through my veins. You know why? I have done
flowing
very awfully wrong at school premises.
something
that shouldn’t be done and would
Something
to be most inappropriate. If I were to be
considered
flip-flop in the sexiest way possible and when he
and
on social media, he’ll send some emojis that
chats
have double meanings. This afternoon, I was
clearly
my hands in the comfort room when I saw
washing
going out of the cubicle. Our eyes caught each
him
sight and locked for a few seconds, he came
other’s
is a central part of anyone’s gender journey. It
Sex
be at its complete state without having an
wouldn’t
of it. It’s magical and horrific both at the
experience
time. Something worth trying. Do not kiss and
same
tell, what you read in this magazine, stays in this
different ways on how they got into the moment,
the
rush of emotions that come along with the
the
Confession 1
I was just feeling so stressed so when Friday
studied.
came I was looking forward to do something.
finally
Confession 2
then, until finally the moans started to get louder,
and
motions began to be more passionate until we
the
I might even get a suspension. Yes, it was that
named,
and I think you already know what I did last
serious
and yes you’re right, I don’t regret even a
summer,
bit of it. This guy was someone I met few days
single
he would look at me giving me chills along the
ago,
of my spine. When he talks, his tongue would twirl
back
another French.
grabbing a cheek of my butt, nipped a kiss on
forward,
nape. Few moments later, I didn’t realize we’re in
my
cubicle already. Our tongues battling each other’s.
the
knelt down and unzipped me and that’s when I saw
He
the light. - Ashley, 19
magazine.

Ineffable
TOO GREAT OR EXTREME TO BE EXPRESSED OR
DESCRIBED IN WORDS.
definition