8 to West Texas, then to Whittier, California, then Ventura, Bakersfield, Compton, then back to Midland. Then, 8-10 years later to Houston, then to Washington, but never a complaint, never a selfish word. What has she meant to me—everything!” 6 Be a Servant Pattern your marriage after the inspiring example of Jesus, who did not hesitate to wash His disciples’ feet (John 13). His action is a reminder that we ought to have the same humility toward others that Jesus had toward His disciples. Do not neglect to be of practical service to your partner—fill her car with gas when the tank is empty; warm his car up on a cold morning; bring her a cup of warm tea when she is feeling discouraged; bring him a small gift to simply celebrate your love; send flowers to her office or home after she has completed a major project. 7 Turn Negatives into Positives Because no one of us is perfect, there are bound to be personality traits, which we may find exasperating from time to time. Rather than allow yourself to be frustrated by this, try
to turn a negative into a positive. Train your mind to automatically turn a weakness into a strength. This is something which relationship authority Gary Smalley often recommends for couples. In his book, Secrets To Lasting Love, he says it is easy to reframe a mate’s negative traits into positive perceptions. He charts the process this way: 9 Negative Trait Nosy Touchy Manipulating Stingy Talkative Flighty Positive Trait He or she may be overly alert or sociable. He or she may be very sensitive. He or she may be a very resourceful person with many creative ideas. He or she may be very thrifty. He or she may be very expressive or dynamic. He or she may be an enthusiastic person with cheerful vitality.