Deer Falls, Volume 1
Autumn hates her mother and the poverty they live in. She is ashamed of both but her hate defines her. If only her mother would tell her about her father or at least his name! When Autumn’s mother needs surgery, she opts to care for her rather than go to a foster home. It is during this time she finds her mother’s journals and her father. This reversal of mother/daughter roles renders insight to both sides of their relationship. Chris’s twin brother is murdered. He battles grief and doubts of his own sanity due to seeing and hearing his dead brother. He struggles with the transition from ‘Chris n Craig’ to ‘Just Chris’. It is the nightmares that finally reveal the awful truth. Ian is brutally abused by his alcoholic father. He develops empathic tendencies from being constantly alert to his father’s moods. He stays in a cave when things get really bad. Ian’s ability gets him into trouble with the law when he rescues a girl from being raped. It is then that Ian fears he is turning into his father. These three teens each find their way through unavoidable circumstances that life throws their way. Through these difficulties, they learn what is important to them, realize their own potential and who they are in the world.
Autumn hates her mother and the poverty they live in. She is ashamed of both but her hate defines her. If only her mother would tell her about her father or at least his name! When Autumn’s mother needs surgery, she opts to care for her rather than go to a foster home. It is during this time she finds her mother’s journals and her father. This reversal of mother/daughter roles renders insight to both sides of their relationship.
Chris’s twin brother is murdered. He battles grief and doubts of his own sanity due to seeing and hearing his dead brother. He struggles with the transition from ‘Chris n Craig’ to ‘Just Chris’. It is the nightmares that finally reveal the awful truth.
Ian is brutally abused by his alcoholic father. He develops empathic tendencies from being constantly alert to his father’s moods. He stays in a cave when things get really bad. Ian’s ability gets him into trouble with the law when he rescues a girl from being raped. It is then that Ian fears he is turning into his father.
These three teens each find their way through unavoidable circumstances that life throws their way. Through these difficulties, they learn what is important to them, realize their own potential and who they are in the world.
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<strong>Deer</strong> <strong>Falls</strong><br />
Her head drops as she mumbles, "I can't take care of you." Her voice cracks, but she continues.<br />
"You have to go. I'm so sorry, honey." I watch tears fill her eyes.<br />
In that instant, my whole world of security, my place in the universe is gone. The room goes<br />
surreal and whitish. I have a sensation of floating without ties to anything real. There's no one to<br />
reach out to, no one to chase after me. I am totally and utterly disconnected. I find Mother's face<br />
and stare in disbelief. My surroundings are reduced to slow motion, while my thoughts are in<br />
hyper-speed. I've never considered losing my home before. I mean, sure, when I'm eighteen, when<br />
I choose to storm out and leave her behind, but not like this. Home is a given, a place that is always<br />
there no matter how bad I act. Memories of the morning flash through my head. I see Beehive<br />
hair lady standing with crossed arms and a smirk on her face. Her voice floats through my mind,<br />
'adoption or something' and 'can't even put food in that girl's mouth.' Next, I see my tears of<br />
humiliation and frustration about my old clothes. Then the angry, electric arrows whiz by that<br />
were aimed at Mother only minutes ago. As the images and emotions swirl in chaos around and<br />
through me I wonder; how did I not see this coming?<br />
Everything begins to catch up with time again. Mother's voice becomes audible, but I miss<br />
most of what she is saying. I look at my hands, they still clutch the PB & J sandwich. This surprises<br />
me, it seems almost funny. My throat closes, so I toss the sandwich on the coffee table. The table<br />
wobbles in protest. I would laugh at its weakness if I weren't so weak myself. I slump down into<br />
our battered couch in defeat. I am suddenly exhausted. The only thing I have a grip on is the reality<br />
of my unknown dad and my miserable life.<br />
So, what will a foster home really be like? I've heard that the state buys those kids school<br />
clothes. Mother won't be around to embarrass me anymore. Do I want to go? Would it be better?<br />
Can I detach myself from her this easily? Do I actually hate this woman enough to cast her aside?<br />
Is this really hate that I feel or just anger and disappointment? I think of times that I've<br />
disappointed her, and on purpose at that. Can I rebuild 'me' from this? Alone?<br />
I watch Mother wipe tears from her eyes. She sniffs. Her world is destroyed too. My heart<br />
hurts for her sadness and for my destined loneliness. All of this, while my life-long anger at her<br />
refusal to tell me about Dad still burns deep inside. It's part of me, that anger, and I've created<br />
who I am around it.<br />
Guilt creeps in from my selfish thoughts of being free from her. I look at her through my guilt,<br />
my anger and our shared sorrow. My heart answers me; No, I can't detach my life from hers that<br />
easily. The comparison of my home to a foster home brings more clarity. Both are humiliating,<br />
but at least at my home, I'm familiar with our beat-up relationship. I have to fight for my home,<br />
this home. It is the only tolerable part left in my world. If this is gone, then I will melt into nothing.<br />
I'll just be dead air floating out there. A ghost girl haunting the streets of <strong>Deer</strong> <strong>Falls</strong>.<br />
Anger builds at the injustice of it all. The more I think about how easy it is for the law and<br />
agencies to push families into oblivion, the angrier I get. It no longer matters to me what is fair or<br />
right or just. This is about survival. And the world doesn't know how hard I can fight! I'll start<br />
with Mother. I'll fight in the way that I know best; by appealing to Mother's guilt and sympathy.<br />
I sit up on the edge of the couch. Mother's eyes watch me. "Mother, hear me out. You don't<br />
understand. There is only one foster home in town that takes teens. Janey Freeze's house. Janey<br />
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