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Superman and the<br />
psychiatrist<br />
Scene: A psychiatrist's consulting<br />
room<br />
Characters: A psychiatrist, Angela (the<br />
psychiatrist's receptionist), Mr.<br />
Wilkins, Superman<br />
The receptionist comes in.<br />
Psychiatrist: Who's next, Angela?<br />
Receptionist: There's a man to see you, doctor.<br />
His name is Wilkins. He<br />
says he can't talk quietly. He<br />
can only shout.<br />
Mr. Wilkins: Can I come in?!!<br />
Psychiatrist: Hmm. Yes, I see. Ask him to<br />
come in.<br />
Receptionist: Come in, Mr. Wilkins.<br />
(He comes in. The receptionist<br />
goes out.)<br />
Mr. Wilkins:<br />
Thank you! Hello, doctor. Sorry<br />
to trouble you.<br />
Psychiatrist: That's all right, Mr. Wilkins. Do<br />
sit down. Now... what seems<br />
to be the trouble?<br />
Mr. Wilkins: Er...Well, doctor, I can't talk<br />
quietly, I can only shout.<br />
Psychiatrist: (Shouting) How long have you<br />
been like this?<br />
Mr. Wilkins:<br />
Psychiatrist:<br />
Mr. Wilkins:<br />
Psychiatrist:<br />
Mr. Wilkins:<br />
Pardon?<br />
(Back to normal) How long<br />
have you been like this<br />
About a week.<br />
Well, don't worry. I think<br />
you've got a very nice shouting<br />
voice.<br />
But I can't go on like this. I'll<br />
lose my job.<br />
Psychiatrist: What is your job?<br />
Mr. Wilkins: I'm a librarian. I work in a<br />
library. I can't shout at work,<br />
you know.<br />
Psychiatrist: In that case, Mr. Wilkins, I<br />
think you should change your<br />
job.<br />
Mr. Wilkins: But what can I do? No one<br />
wants a man who can only<br />
shout.<br />
Psychiatrist: You could get a job as an<br />
English teacher.<br />
Mr. Wilkins: An English teacher?<br />
Psychiatrist: Yes, they shout all the time.<br />
Mr. Wilkins: All right, doctor. I'll do that.<br />
Goodbye.<br />
Psychiatrist: Goodbye, Mr. Wilkins.<br />
Mr. Wilkins:<br />
(He leaves, still shouting.)<br />
Hey, you! Write down this<br />
verb!<br />
Receptionist: Goodbye, Mr. Wilkins.<br />
The receptionist comes back<br />
into the room.<br />
Receptionist: Is Mr. Wilkins all right, doctor?<br />
Psychiatrist:<br />
Yes. He's going to be an<br />
English teacher.<br />
Receptionist: Oh.<br />
Psychiatrist: Who's next?<br />
Receptionist: Superman.<br />
Psychiatrist: Superman?<br />
Receptionist: Yes.<br />
Psychiatrist: Oh, I see,. someone who<br />
thinks he's Superman.<br />
Receptionist: No, doctor. He really is<br />
Superman.<br />
Psychiatrist:<br />
What? The big, strong man<br />
who flies through the air?<br />
Receptionist: Yes.<br />
Psychiatrist: Oh, I see. Ask him to come in.<br />
Receptionist: Yes, doctor. (To Superman)<br />
Come this way, please.<br />
(Superman comes in, very<br />
tired and out-of-breath.)<br />
Superman: Thank you.<br />
Psychiatrist: Thank you, Angela.<br />
(The receptionist goes out.)<br />
Psychiatrist: Good morning, Mr...er...<br />
Superman: Superman.<br />
118 SKETCHES
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