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6 months ago

Comfortable Madness First PDF 4-13-18

Nothing Changed Cherry

Nothing Changed Cherry blossoms came apart in the wind, pink and white petals twisting in the air before settling on cars, gathering in gutters, sticking to windows. Cigarette smoke hung for a moment in the air before falling apart. I felt sick. Something stuck to the back of my throat, gagging me. I choked on the very air. Down behind the greenhouse, stoners got stoned. Out in the parking lot, skinny chicks and geeks shuffled into school. I didn’t fit in. I had nothing in common with these people. Miss Tris and Tad showed up in pink. They laughed and joked until they saw me and not Tayla. Things were getting awkward with everyone. “You look miserable,” Tad said. “I am.” “What’s up?” Miss Tris asked. “Things,” I said. I thought for a moment. It was time to talk. They needed to know. I knew they worried about me and I knew they worried about Tayla. They just didn’t know what was happening or why. “I have something to tell you,” I said. I stopped for a moment and put the words together in my head before letting them fall to my mouth and out into the world. My skin crawled and sweat sprung out all over. “Guys,” I said. “Tayla and I…I’m pregnant.” It hung there for a moment. “How’d that happen?” Miss Tris asked. “Don’t know,” I said. “Jesus,” Tad said. “No kidding.” The bell rang but none of us moved. This was more important than class. They had questions just like everyone else. Only, with these guys, I was willing to answer some of them. “So that’s why Tayla’s all bent,” Tad said.

“She thinks I cheated,” I said. “Well…” Miss Tris said. “It was Gid,” I said. “The guy from your dreams?” Tad asked. “Exactly.” Disbelief and pity fought for dominance. They frowned and thought and tried to not seem too judgmental. “I didn’t cheat,” I said. “You did something,” Tad said. “It’s not like that.” “What’s it like then?” Tad asked. “I didn’t want this.” “No doubt,” Miss Tris said. “There’s just one way to get pregnant,” Tad said. “I swear,” I said. “I didn’t fuck anyone.” A swirling wind lifted a few petals in the air. “It doesn’t matter,” Miss Tris said. “We love you. It doesn’t change anything.” They came and hugged me and the weight of their arms brought me back from the edge of madness for a moment. Now all I had to do was figure out how to get Tayla to believe me too.