Views
2 months ago

Covey - The 7 habits of highly effective people

lasted so long. Until we

lasted so long. Until we worked and communicated on the level of our essential paradigms, the chronic underlying problems were still there. When we began to work from the Inside-Out, we were able to build a relationship of trust and openness and to resolve dysfunctional differences in a deep and lasting way that never could have come by working from the outside in. The delicious fruits -- a rich winwin relationship, a deep understanding of each other, and a marvelous synergy -- grew out of the roots we nurtured as we examined our programs, rescripted ourselves, and managed our lives so that we could create time for the important Quadrant II activity of communicating deeply with each other. And there were other fruits. We were able to see on a much deeper level that, just as powerfully as our own lives had been affected by our parents, the lives of our children were being influenced and shaped by us, often in ways we didn't even begin to realize. Understanding the power of scripting in our own lives, we felt a renewed desire to do everything we could to make certain that what we passed on to future generations, by both precept and example, was based on correct principles. I have drawn particular attention in this book to those scripts we have been given which we proactively want to change. But as we examine our scripting carefully, many of us will also begin to see beautiful scripts, positive scripts that have been passed down to us which we have blindly taken for granted. Real self-awareness helps us to appreciate those scripts and to appreciate those who have gone before us and nurtured us in principlebased living, mirroring back to us not only what we are, but what we can become. There is transcendent power in a strong intergenerational family. An effectively interdependent family of children, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins can be a powerful force in helping people have a sense of who they are and where they came from and what they stand for. It's great for children to be able to identify themselves with the "tribe," to feel that many people know them and care about them, even though they're spread all over the country. And that can be a tremendous benefit as you nurture your family. If one of your children is having difficulty and doesn't really relate with you at a particular time in his life, maybe he can relate to your brother or sister who can become a surrogate father or mother, a mentor, or a hero for a period of time. Grandparents who show a great interest in their grandchildren are among the most precious people on this earth. What a marvelous positive social mirror they can be! My mother is like that. Even now, in her late 80s, she takes a deep personal interest in every one of her descendants. She writes us love letters. I was reading one the other day on a plane with tears streaming down my cheeks. could call her up tonight and I know she'd say, "Stephen, I want you to know how much I love you and how wonderful I think you are." She's constantly reaffirming. A strong intergenerational family is potentially one of the most fruitful, rewarding, and satisfying interdependent relationships. And many people feel the importance of that relationship. Look at the fascination we all had with Roots some years ago. Each of us has roots and the ability to trace those roots, to identify our ancestors. The highest and most powerful motivation in doing that is not for ourselves only, but for our posterity, for the posterity of all mankind. As someone once observed, "There are only two lasting bequests we can give our children -- one is roots, the other wings." 205

Becoming a Transition Person Among other things, I believe that giving "wings" to our children and to others means empowering them with the freedom to rise above negative scripting that had been passed down to us. I believe it means becoming what my friend and associate, Dr. Terry Warner, calls a "transition" person. Instead of transferring those scripts to the next generation, we can change them. And we can do it in a way that will build relationships in the process If your parents abused you as a child, that does not mean that you have to abuse your own children. Yet there's plenty of evidence to indicate that you will tend to live out that script. But because you're proactive, you can rewrite the script. You can choose not only not to abuse your children, but to affirm them, to script them in positive ways. You can write it in your personal mission statement and into your mind and heart. You can visualize yourself living in harmony with that mission statement in your Daily Private Victory. You can take steps to love and forgive your own parents, and if they are still living, to build a positive relationship with them by seeking to understand. A tendency that's run through your family for generations can stop with you. You're a transition person -- a link between the past and the future. And your own change can affect many, many lives downstream. One powerful transition person of the twentieth century, Anwar Sadat, left us as part of his legacy a profound understanding of the nature of change. Sadat stood between a past that had created a "huge wall of suspicion, fear, hate and misunderstanding" between Arabs and Israelis, and a future in which increased conflict and isolation seemed inevitable. Efforts at negotiation had been met with objections on every scale -- even to formalities and procedural points, to an insignificant comma or period in the text of proposed agreements. While others attempted to resolve the tense situation by hacking at the leaves, Sadat drew upon his earlier centering experience in a lonely prison cell and went to work on the root. And in doing so, he changed the course of history for millions of people. He records in his autobiography: It was then that I drew, almost unconsciously, on the inner strength I had developed in Cell 54 of Cairo Central Prison -- a strength, call it a talent or capacity, for change. I found that I faced a highly complex situation, and that I couldn't hope to change it until I had armed myself with the necessary psychological and intellectual capacity. My contemplation of life and human nature in that secluded place had taught me that he who cannot change the very fabric of his thought will never be able to change reality, and will never, therefore, make any progress. Change -- real change -- comes from the Inside-Out. It doesn't come from hacking at the leaves of attitude and behavior with quick-fix personality ethic techniques. It comes from striking at the root -the fabric of our thought, the fundamental, essential paradigms, which give definition to our character and create the lens through which we see the world. In the words of Amiel: Moral truth can be conceived in thought. One can have feelings about it. One can will to live it. But moral truth may have been penetrated and possessed in all these ways, and escape us still. Deeper even than consciousness there is our being itself -- our very 206

  • Page 1 and 2:

    THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIV

  • Page 3 and 4:

    These principles, however, are like

  • Page 5 and 6:

    Stephen Covey adds great value to a

  • Page 7 and 8:

    I have a forceful personality. I kn

  • Page 9 and 10:

    This personality ethic, I began to

  • Page 11 and 12:

    long-term relationship they have, w

  • Page 13 and 14:

    The professor then asked one studen

  • Page 15 and 16:

    ingenuity, and creating a standard

  • Page 17 and 18:

    Shortly after dark, the lookout on

  • Page 19 and 20:

    The more closely our maps or paradi

  • Page 21 and 22:

    So I first tried a simple request.

  • Page 23 and 24:

    There's so much to do. And there's

  • Page 25 and 26:

    But from my own experience -- both

  • Page 27 and 28:

    interdependent, that there is an ec

  • Page 29 and 30:

    Understanding the sequence will hel

  • Page 31 and 32:

    training, the communicating, the re

  • Page 33 and 34:

    trust, and lost the asset of custom

  • Page 35 and 36:

    disappear. Those you teach will see

  • Page 37 and 38:

    "You're never on time." "Why can't

  • Page 39 and 40:

    instincts and conditioning and cond

  • Page 41 and 42:

    such personal freedom and the effec

  • Page 43 and 44:

    you to act. If you wait to be acted

  • Page 45 and 46:

    "Think hard. What do you think woul

  • Page 47 and 48:

    Because of position, wealth, role,

  • Page 49 and 50:

    So these executives focused on find

  • Page 51 and 52:

    We can decide to be dishonest in ou

  • Page 53 and 54:

    Knowing that we are responsible --

  • Page 55 and 56:

    When I look upon the tombs of the g

  • Page 57 and 58:

    Whether we are aware of it or not,

  • Page 59 and 60:

    Because we already live with many s

  • Page 61 and 62:

    Succeed at home first. Seek and mer

  • Page 63 and 64:

    so-called mental and emotional illn

  • Page 65 and 66:

    When we are dependent on the person

  • Page 67 and 68:

    Innocent pleasures in moderation ca

  • Page 69 and 70:

    Because the church is a formal orga

  • Page 71 and 72:

    If you are Money Centered... SECURI

  • Page 73 and 74:

    WISDOM You see the world through a

  • Page 75 and 76:

    We can depend on them Principles do

  • Page 77 and 78:

    POWER Your power is limited only by

  • Page 79 and 80:

    Fourth, you can communicate to your

  • Page 81 and 82:

    many different kinds of thought pro

  • Page 83 and 84:

    We would try to get him in a very r

  • Page 85 and 86:

    I inspire: I teach by example that

  • Page 87 and 88:

    When we plan our family goals and a

  • Page 89 and 90:

    "Everybody," he replied. "Everybody

  • Page 91 and 92:

    Application Suggestions 1. Take the

  • Page 93 and 94:

    Management, remember, is clearly di

  • Page 95 and 96:

    with the bath water," reverting to

  • Page 97 and 98:

    was to enforce the contract -- to c

  • Page 99 and 100:

    There are many people who recognize

  • Page 101 and 102:

    Coherence: Coherence suggests that

  • Page 103 and 104:

    mission statement, you may want to

  • Page 105 and 106:

    all day. Remember, frustration is a

  • Page 107 and 108:

    it! -- Don't take it!" I was afraid

  • Page 109 and 110:

    "You, Dad?" "No, not me. You're the

  • Page 111 and 112:

    I bit my tongue and waited until af

  • Page 113 and 114:

    Application Suggestions: 1. Identif

  • Page 115 and 116:

    "Well, you'd like to take a screwdr

  • Page 117 and 118:

    And this is in the most intimate, t

  • Page 119 and 120:

    Our tendency is to project out of o

  • Page 121 and 122:

    "I thought you meant that the quali

  • Page 123 and 124:

    you are honest and open and kind wi

  • Page 125 and 126:

    When we violate the primary laws of

  • Page 127 and 128:

    deep personal affection which added

  • Page 129 and 130:

    Habit 4: Think Win-Win TM -- Princi

  • Page 131 and 132:

    "My parents don't love me as much a

  • Page 133 and 134:

    I know of a divorce in which the hu

  • Page 135 and 136:

    "In other words, you lost." "That's

  • Page 137 and 138:

    worked to set up a Win-Win Agreemen

  • Page 139 and 140:

    High courage and consideration are

  • Page 141 and 142:

    communication process. You listen m

  • Page 143 and 144:

    people be able to do when they fini

  • Page 145 and 146:

    guidelines, and resources to make s

  • Page 147 and 148:

    40. The spirit of win-win had signi

  • Page 149 and 150:

    Roger Fisher and William Ury, two H

  • Page 151 and 152:

    Habit 5: Seek First to Understand,

  • Page 153 and 154:

    and influence, I don't feel safe en

  • Page 155 and 156: You're listening to understand. You
  • Page 157 and 158: Sandra described the symptoms and h
  • Page 159 and 160: esults in communication. To many, s
  • Page 161 and 162: "I know you've sacrificed, Dad. But
  • Page 163 and 164: What a difference real understandin
  • Page 165 and 166: I remember writing one time in a ro
  • Page 167 and 168: trust of another person's communica
  • Page 169 and 170: Habit 5 is something you can practi
  • Page 171 and 172: Habit 6: Synergize TM Principles of
  • Page 173 and 174: hit-or-miss, trial and error. And u
  • Page 175 and 176: very open and authentic and simply
  • Page 177 and 178: Synergy means that 1 + 1 may equal
  • Page 179 and 180: arrange for some help at the first
  • Page 181 and 182: "I know," he replied with a forced
  • Page 183 and 184: He also developed charley horses fr
  • Page 185 and 186: scheduled payments were met. It was
  • Page 187 and 188: Application Suggestions 1. Think ab
  • Page 189 and 190: "Sharpen the Saw" basically means e
  • Page 191 and 192: If you haven't been exercising, you
  • Page 193 and 194: This is why I believe a personal mi
  • Page 195 and 196: centered on the principles of perso
  • Page 197 and 198: diminishes us. It increases us beca
  • Page 199 and 200: create negative force field resista
  • Page 201 and 202: closer we align ourselves with corr
  • Page 203 and 204: The children looked forward to the
  • Page 205: Sandra and I were amazed at what we
  • Page 209 and 210: Again, T. S. Eliot expresses so bea
  • Page 211 and 212: * * If your center is Pleasure... S
  • Page 213 and 214: This is the way you may tend to per
  • Page 215 and 216: Many third-generation time managers
  • Page 217 and 218: Preparing the media budget. Regardi
  • Page 219: produce interesting and creative wa
Nine Habits of Effective Data-Driven Performance Management
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People - IEP Karachi Centre
Leadership and The Seven Habits of Highly ... - Nebraska FBLA
“Designing a Green America: 7 Habits of a Highly Effective Nation ”
UNDER DEVELOPMENT The six habits of highly effective ...
Ten Effective Habits of Indispensable IT Departments [PDF] - Kaseya
the-7-habits-ofhighly-effective-people
THE 7 HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People® - Franklin Covey
website The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey ...
Stephen R Covey The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People ...
THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens - Ltc-intl.com
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People®
Utilizing Covey's Seven Habits of Highly Effective People to Implement
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People® - IACLEA
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People For Educators
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Arts Organizations - Arts Consulting ...
Review: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People - Bulls Eye
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Students
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens - Olentangy Local Schools
7 HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE - Ranching For Profit