JAVA-NOV-2018

WHYLD ASS
Vegan Delights - By Sloane Burwell
About a year ago, a new vendor appeared at the Uptown Farmers Market. I had
no idea what they were selling, but when I saw their banner in my early morning,
pre-caffeinated haze, my brain read their name as Wyld Stallyns, the intergalactic
band made famous in Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. Alas, no Keanu Reeves or
air guitars were to be found in their charming booth: instead, it was an outpost of
the Flagstaff vegan restaurant WHyld Ass. Since then, their stand has regularly
stocked some of their greatest hits, including what have become two staples in
my kitchen – carrot habanero hot sauce and sprouted grainy mustard.
They’ve recently expanded their vegan empire to include another brick-and-mortar
location, nestled into a tiny spot just south of Camelback on 7th Street. WHyld
Ass (I will never tire of saying their name) seeks to serve tasty food with a focus
on health, without pretension or faux meat analogues. You won’t find any Impossible
Burgers; no faux wings anywhere in sight. What you will find is very affordable,
flavorful and healthy plant-based food, served with a touch of sass.
WHyld Ass packs about 10 tiny tables inside a cheery, well-lit box. Outside, you’ll
find space for maybe another six people. This means it’s pretty easy to make a
friend or at least overhear some interesting conversations around you. The pastry
case always sports a couple of berry cobblers, their exceptional banana bread and
my favorite – the Pepita Chocolate Brownie ($3.50). About the size of a dollar bill,
this brownie is light, moist and pretty close to a cake. Whole pepitas are stirred in
and scattered on the top. It’s incredibly tasty, and in a blind taste test, I wouldn’t
have known this was vegan. I adored my huge slice of Maple Cinnamon Cake
($3.75), an explosion of fall flavors that I can’t wait to taste again. Expect a rotating
selection of baked goods, with a nod toward the seasons.
Everyone is served chlorophyll water in lieu of tap or filtered water. Each visit,
the mix was a bit different. On my first visit, it was so light that it made the glass
appear slightly green. I preferred this version, since the taste was more umamilike.
On my last visit, it was nearly the color of lime Kool-Aid. Still interestingly
flavored, this version had a taste that was distinctly grassy. Not bad, but not my
favorite. Evidently, chlorophyll is a powerful antioxidant.
On a chalkboard, you’ll find the current flavors of kombucha listed. I absolutely
adored the Watermelon ($3.50/small), which tastes like liquid Jolly Rancher, but
slightly less sweet. For an extra 35 cents, go for the jalapeño upcharge. It cuts the
sweet and is an interesting counterbalance.
Breakfast is a treat. Maybe one day I’ll try a coffee smoothie, but instead I opted
for the Spicy Stabilizer ($6.50), a kicky mix of celery, cucumber, lemon and cayenne.
Once their espresso machine is up, expect a litany of coffee drinks, but
today drip coffee will suffice. I absolutely adored the Stuffed French Toast ($12):
two slices of gluten-free bread loaded with Danish cashew cheese and smothered
in berry compote. The sweet potato hash served alongside is crispy perfection,
made even more perfect when dunked in a dollop of their house-made sprouted
grainy mustard. Fair warning – this condiment packs a punch!
Everyone loved the Biscuits and Gravy ($8.50). A massive rosemary and orange biscuit
is split and covered in black pepper chipotle gravy. It’s warming and hearty, and
the smattering of Southern-inspired kale collard greens on top cuts fat like a knife.
For fun, we ordered the Zucchini Bacon ($3.50). While no one is going to mistake
it for the real thing, it was salty, charming and delicious swirled into the sweet
French toast and savory biscuits and gravy. I’d order it again – probably on their
BLT next time.
Expect their early opening menu to be fluid. This week’s selections were mostly
greatest hits from their Flagstaff location. That will expand as they get their
bearings. However, no matter what is added, I don’t want to miss their Avo Melt
($11.50). A panini is loaded with their potato cheese (is it cheese? I’m not sure, but
it is creamy and enjoyable), fresh avocado and black beans, and grilled until hot and
crispy. The heat does something to the fat in the avocado, so when it’s delivered via
bread, crunchy from the press, it’s just about perfect. The accompanying side salad
is fresh and flavorful, topped with their kicky, herby and refreshing vinaigrette.
I also loved their Farmers Warm Veggie Salad ($11.00). I’m assuming this gets its
name from the seasonal veggies they find in the markets. This time it was carrots,
zucchini, mushrooms, onions and garlic, tossed with that kicky vinaigrette and
served over a large mound of warm quinoa, which covers fistfuls of spring mix salad
greens. It’s literally a plate of healthy goodness. While I wouldn’t call the walnut
parmesan actual cheese, it does lend a salty, savory and creamy component that
lifts the dish. Good for you isn’t always this good.
You’ll find their Superfood Guacamole all over the menu. Our new server wasn’t up
to speed on all the ingredients that made it superfood, but we did detect chia seeds
in the mix, adding a slightly crunchy element. We asked for just a scoop, which was
precisely what we got – served neat, without any scooping mechanism, like chips.
We didn’t miss them. We ate forkfuls of superfood guac until it was super gone. I
love gauc, and this is a good one: minimal cilantro, lots of crunch from onions and
tomato, and loads of lime juice. Superfood? Not sure. Super good? Absolutely.
WHyld Ass clearly has a sense of humor and a mission. They are bringing fresh,
flavorful, plant-based food with a nod toward the environment to central Phoenix.
Printed all over the menu, WHyld Ass proclaims, “Excited to be here!” I believe
them. And with food this tasty, I’m excited too.
WHyld Ass Phoenix
4810 N. 7th St., Phoenix
whyldass.com
JAVA
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