Happiful October 2019

TRUE LIFE
levels when they followed
her finger with their gaze.
If your brow is deeply
furrowed right now, you
wouldn’t be alone. How
can my eyes following
a stranger’s finger help
me? So, in my own nontechnical
way let me try to
explain…
The brain is like a filing
cabinet, and the majority
of memories throughout
your life are filed in
sequence, and in the
Kerry with her mum, Doreen
Kerry with her children
The black hole I was living in was
becoming deeper and darker
right order. It’s believed
that traumas or painful
memories may have been
filed incorrectly, and are
buried deep down in the
wrong place. Your brain
might never have fully
processed or made sense
of them. EMDR helps to
unlock these, and lessen
the distress felt when
recalling such painful
memories.
On my first session I
had to list five of my most
painful memories, and it
would be these that we’d
work on, one by one, as
the weeks progressed.
The lovely psychologist
I’d been referred to would
note down the negative
connotations I felt around
each event – I’m a failure,
I feel guilty, I’m a bad
mother etc. We’d then
write down the positive
connotations of what
I wanted to feel about
myself – I’m worthy, I did
the right thing, I’m a good
mother.
I’d close my eyes while
thinking about one of
my painful memories,
scan my whole body and
say out loud what I was
feeling or thinking, and
give the level of distress I
felt a score. Interestingly,
many of my memories
impacted my stomach,
and often my chest would
feel really tight, like
something was pressing
on it, and my breathing
became very fast. I would
then open my eyes and
follow her finger as it
went from side to side,
still thinking about the
initial event. >>>
October 2019 • happiful.com • 53