Kingstown College Coaching Magazine vol.5 2019/2020

www.kingstowncollege.ie
21
When the tree flowers and bear fruits, all of
its branches receive mineral sap. Mineral
sap comes from the Earth, it is water and
minerals that are absorbed through the
root system. In the leaves, the process of
photosynthesis transforms it in organic
sap, containing sugars that are enabling
the tree to grow. Each part of the tree is
essential to its life. They are connected
and each has a purpose. A single branch
cannot live on its own.
In order to become the best we can be it is
crucial to define and be aware of the core
of who we are, the me, from whom comes
all of our likenesses. Me is my anchor, the
conscience of who I am as an individual.
My true self. My true self feeds from
some of the energy/experience gathered
in some likenesses and redirect some
energy/experience to other likenesses.
This give and take has the purpose of
creating balance.
It would be very difficult to be truly fulfilled
if one decides to rather be a single likeness
and forget the rest of what he/she is. This is
going into denial, into denying that we are
many in one and that it is the source of our
complexity as human beings.
A tree is well anchored in Earth, it has
balance in its roots and branch system
in order to stand straight, its crown
symmetrical.
In the same way we have to have balance
between the different parts of us and it
can be done by acknowledging core and
likenesses.
How does the concept of the tree of life
and core can be useful for a coach?
The concept is powerful tool of self
reflection.
Core means who we really are. It is about
coming back to our bone marrow, to our
essence, to take the time to reflect and
define the “me“. It is about finding the
balance between the likenesses around
our core. The core is our anchor.
How do we achieve that?
The coach has a huge treasure box to sort
out as the knowledge of who the person
is can be completely non existent if the
person is lost into the most important of
her ‘now likeness‘.
For example, some women thrive to be
moms. Once they are moms they forget
to be the wife to their husband, the friend
to their friends, the colleague at work, the
daughter, the aunt...Everything becomes
secondary after the child. They are lost
in their now likeness, which is, being
mom. Yet, being mom is only a branch
of her Tree of Life. Not her whole tree.
It’s like looking at something through a
microscope. Enhanced, clear, intense, but
also a distortion of reality.
The coach has to lead the person through
his questions to the self discovery journey
of herself, in other words to define her
core, her likenesses. See if she has the
consciousness of either.
Start with writing down a list of adjectives
that the person feel define her at the
beginning of the session.
(The coach can double check that list later
on with the key words that came up during
the self discovery journey: Is there ‘par‘
between the first list aka feeling of who
the person think she is and what appears
to be her core? Or is the ‘par‘ happening
more with what appears to be one of her
likenesses, probably her ‘now likeness’?)
Some of the following powerful
questions could help Identify the
likenesses and the core:
• How would you describe who you are
now?
• Is it different from whom you were?
How?
• Is it different from whom you thought
you would be?
• Can you get a sense of who you are as
a person and describe it?
• How does it feel?
• What is fully contented for you?
• How do you define contentment?
• What is the picture of happiness for
you?
• Who is in that picture?
• Has the picture changed? How?
When?
• If tomorrow you could be whatever
you want to be what will it be? With
who? Where? How would it feel?
• What would be missing?
• What is whole for you?
The challenge for the coach is to grow the
understanding of the person about herself
in terms of core and likenesses.
What are her likenesses? Identify them,
explore them.
Which are the common parts between
these likenesses as they get together to
form her core? (Here we work backwards in
a way as it is from the core that likenesses
branch out).
Through intuition and listening skills,
the coach will be able to get the mental
picture projected by the person. He can
write down the key words which can be
names of likenesses, their respective
attributes (among which lay values,
strengths, beliefs), or/and pieces of core,