WWomen Mag 2019 pages

Dear Winning Woman,
God laid this theme on my heart because I believe He wants us all to
manifest and show His glory to the world. God wants to use us to show the
world what He is truly like and draw those who do not know Him, closer for
salvation.
To manifest means to be readily perceived by the eye or the understanding;
to be evident, obvious, apparent, plain, to prove and to show beyond doubt
or question.
The people around you, your family, friends and peers, they are all waiting
for the real you to manifest. You cannot hide or put things off anymore.
You were created to be blessed and to a blessing.
But we cannot do anything on our own, we need Christ to be the source of
power in our lives. Only then will we be able to run and not be weary and
walk and not faint. If we are going to be the original versions of ourselves,
and not a copy; we need to allow the Holy Spirit to work in us.
This year’s convention will provide the platform to step out in faith and trust
that as God has called you, He will make His greatness manifest through
you.
Yemisi Ashimolowo
Inside this issue
About the
Winning Women
5 Ministry
Born to
Manifest
6 His Glory
Prayer to make God’s
power Manifest in
10 your life
Parenting
13 Feature

Yemisi Ashimolowo is the Resident Pastor of
KICC Prayer City (the Headquarter Church),
and the President of KICC’s Winning Women
ministry, Pastor Yemisi oversees the spiritual lives
of thousands. Her passion and determination to
equip people with the necessary knowledge, gifts
and talents to enable them to reach their potential
in Christ continues to drive her to do greater
exploits for the Lord. As the Head of the Women’s
ministry, Pastor Yemisi provides spiritual counsel
and empowerment programmes to help women be
all that God ordained them to be.
Her philanthropic work has seen her tirelessly and
sacrificially commit to supporting orphanages and
other charitable work. Pastor Yemisi is married to
KICC Senior Pastor Matthew Ashimolowo and
they are blessed with two sons and grandchildren.
Pastor Dolapo is an Associate Pastor at Victory
International Church, Nigeria. She oversees the
Palace Pillars Fellowship, a forum for all women
in ministry, and she is the convener of Dolapo
Adelakun Mentoring Ministry (DAMSEL), a
school of ministry for women and young ladies
around the world.
A down to earth teacher and practitioner of
God’s Word, Pastor Dolapo is also a prolific
writer and her ministry’s Director of Schools and
Co-Promoter of its recently licensed Dominion
University, Nigeria. She is married to Bishop T.V.
Adelakun and they are blessed with two sons.
Kimberly Jonespothier, known as Real Talk Kim,
travels the world fulfilling her passion and purpose
of loving people back to life. She is a wife, mother,
pastor, entrepreneur, best-selling author, entertainer
and most importantly a worshiper after God’s own
heart. Pastor Kim and her husband Mark Pothier
are the Senior Pastors at Church of the Harvest in
Fayetteville, Georgia and together they have four
sons.
She is a human rights advocate with a passion for
giving back and believes in the compassion of the
Holy Spirit, delivering it to those who need it most.
Pastor Kim is an advocate partner with Rock Paper
Scissors Foundation, a Non-profit Organization,
which exists to foster healing and give a voice to those
who have been silenced from all forms of abuse and
human trafficking.
Rev. Christina is one of God’s anointed end time
prophetic preachers, with a strong mandate to preach
the Gospel of the Kingdom and of Christ Jesus with
simplicity and clarity as God intended. Rev. Christina
is a Pastor’s Pastor, and has raised many leaders in this
capacity.
Her mandate is to promote and challenge saints to
grow, leading them into their God assigned destinies
and inheritance in Christ. She is married to Pastor
Ken Obeng and together they are Co-founders and
Senior Pastors of Anchor City Church International.
They are blessed with two children.
Pastor Fola Achudume is a dynamic woman of God with
a burden to see women of all ages and classes occupy their
places in destiny and fulfil their purpose.
Pastor Fola is the President of Victory Women International
(The Women Arm of Victory Life Bible Church), and the
President and convener of several recognised national and
international organisations. She is also the founder of
The Save Her Project established to rescue and rehabilitate
abused ladies for a better life.
She is married to Apostle Lawrence Achudume, the General
Overseer of Victory Life Bible Church International, and
they have four children.
Born in Lagos, Nigeria, Monique started in the choir
leading God’s people in songs of praise and heartfelt
worship. Since then, she has gone on to receive
nominations and win several awards, including the Nigeria
Entertainment Awards in America, AGMA in the United
kingdom and the All Africa Music Awards, AFRIMA. Her
aspiration is to help build altars of worship in every heart
and every home.
Monique is married and with children.
By Pastor Matthew Ashimolowo
The word Manifest is
very profound. It has its
root in the Greek word
‘Apokalupsis’. It conveys the
message of the removal of
a cover to expose what is
hidden.
The other words which derive
their roots from apokalupsis,
and mean the same thing
as Manifest are: disclosure,
revealing, revelation and
appearing.
To manifest is to lay bare;
making naked; a disclosure of
the truth. It is making known,
things that are previously
unknown
Manifest is used for events and
things hitherto withdrawn from
view, now made visible to all.
Having considered all of the
above, and having an indepth
look at the meaning
of manifest and the other
words that derive their root
from apokalupsis, it is clear
that there is more to you than
meets the eye.
The Bible says it is the glory of
God to conceal a matter, it is
the glory of kings (and queens)
to reveal it. Greatness, destiny,
your calling and purpose were
concealed from when you were
a thought on the mind of God.
The degree of your manifestation
is dependent on the
pressure you put on yourself.
Diamonds remain crude until
pressure is put on them to
shine.
Everything you go through is
part of your revealing. Esther
lived in the slave quarters until
it was time to manifest her
destiny. The challenges her
people faced revealed her
even more. When there was
trouble for the Jews in exile
Esther manifested queenship.
When there was war against
her people, Deborah became
a gallant warrior.
Ruth put bereavement behind
to manifest as the great
grandmother of King David.
We are waiting for YOU.
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5

BORN TO
MANIFEST
HIS GLORY
To manifest means to exhibit,
prove, confirm, declare,
demonstrate, display, express,
parade, personify and proclaim.
The purpose of man is to
manifest the glory of God.
Moreover whom He
predestined, these He also
called; whom He called, these
He also justified; and whom He
justified, these He also glorified.
Romans 8:30 (NKJV)
We came short of the glory
while we were yet sinners but
the gift of God is eternal life in
Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans
6:23 (NIV), Therefore, glory
comes by a reconciliation to
God.
By Pastor Yemisi Ashimolowo
Glory is an
expression of the
limitless, boundless,
infinite nature of God.
In the Hebrew and
Greek languages,
it is called KABHOD
meaning the dignity of
God and an exalted or
prosperous state. It is a
thing that brings renown, a
special distinction, fame and
honour
The word glory also conveys the
following meanings:
1. ABUNDANCE
When a believer resides in
the place of glory, through an
intimate relationship with Jesus
Christ, she lives in the place where
there is abundance. John 10:10
2. HONOUR
Glory means to Honour.
“for your shame ye shall have
double; and for confusion
they shall rejoice in their
portion: therefore in their
land they shall possess
the double: everlasting
joy shall be unto
them.” Isaiah 61:7
You shall
be become
an honourable
person. It may not
be the choice of people
but it will certainly be
recognised by them.
3. RICHES
You come into the wealth and
riches that God has foreordained
for your life.
4. SPLENDOUR
Glory means great splendour, to
be taken out of ashes and called to
a place of God’s Glory.
Glory goes beyond immaculate
dressing, and a shiny new car or
big house.
You were created to show all that
God is.
THE RESULT OF GLORY
The result of glory is to be
glorious.
1. It means “Hphara” – to
be adorned. God adorns
you and beautifies your life
with your heart’s desire.
“Then adorn yourself with glory
and splendour, and clothe yourself
in honour and majesty”. Job 40:10
2. It means beautiful or beauty.
God wants to beautify you. The
word “Glorious” is from the
Hebrew “Dipharah” a place of
beauty.
“To appoint unto them that
mourn in Zion, to give unto them
beauty for ashes, the oil of joy
for mourning, the garment of
praise for the spirit of heaviness;
that they might be called trees of
righteousness, the planting of the
LORD, that he might be glorified.”
Isaiah 61:3
3. Dipharah means to boast
God will bring you to a place
where you can boast of what He
is doing and the goodness of the
Lord. You are a trophy of His grace.
“Therefore as it is written, let him
who boasts boast in the Lord.”
1 Corinthians 1:31
THE HOLY SPIRIT AT
WORK IN US
Isaiah 61:1-7 explains what
happens when we manifest God’s
glory. The Holy Spirit works in us
to change us into agents of good
news in a bad world. We become
healing ministers because the Spirit
of the Lord anoints us to preach
the Good News to the poor.
However, only the free have the
ability to release captives. Have
you traded your sorrows for the joy
of the Lord? Have you accepted
His beauty for your ashes?
God is working to make you a
better version of yourself; one that
you never dreamed possible.
“But you shall receive power
(ability, efficiency, and might) when
the Holy Spirit has come upon
you, and you shall be My witnesses
in Jerusalem and all Judea and
Samaria and to the ends (the very
bounds) of the earth.” Acts 1:8
“Truly, the earnest expectation
of the creature waiteth for the
manifestation of the sons of God.”
Romans 8:19
You are made to carry glory and
honour. It’s time to arise to new
heights and places of significance.
This article is based on the message
Born to manifest His Glory
© Yemisi Ashimolowo
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7

About The Winning Women Ministry
The Winning Women ministry
at Kingsway International
Christian Centre fulfils an
essential function within the
church. Since its establishment in
1996, the ministry has consistently
pressed towards its overall goal to
challenge women to become the best
that God has ordained them to be.
Headed by Pastor Yemisi Ashimolowo,
the Resident Pastor of KICC at the
Winning Women ministry brings
women together and aims to create
a refreshing, renewal and re-focus to
the vision of God’s daughters through
the Spirit of Jesus Christ our Lord. The
Winning Women ministry’s mandate,
through fellowship, interactive
seminars, counselling and mentoring,
is for women to do exploits for the
Lord as Ruth, Esther, Deborah and
other women did in Biblical times.
THE VISION
As 21st century women our vision for
every woman who comes into contact
with the Winning Woman ministry is
for them to experience God in a new
dimension, fully aware that when you
encounter the joy releasing barrier
breaking power of God, you are able
to lead a life of excellence and be
empowered to make a positive impact
in your families, church communities
and the world.
Winning Women is open to women
of all age groups, nationalities and
backgrounds. This is reflected through
our regular meetings for women from
all walks of life.
CURRENTLY, WINNING
WOMEN MEETINGS ARE HELD
FOR:
• Mothers in Waiting (wives believing
God for the fruit of the womb)
• Ladies in Waiting (single ladies)
• Successful Wives (married women)
• Senior Sisters (aged 50 and above)
• Annual general meetings
THOUGH WORD-BASED
PREACHING AND TEACHING,
WE SEEK TO:
• Encourage women to have more
confidence in what they can
achieve through God’s power, in
order to reach their potential for
Christ.
• Help women to move beyond
the personal, environmental and
societal limitations to becoming
winning women for Christ.
• Encourage women to develop Godly
self-esteem and a God-glorifying
confidence.
• Help women feel successful and
fulfilled, whether married or single.
• Encourage women to excel by
challenging them to be focused and
to be the best they can be.
IT IS OUR GOAL TO:
• Hold bi-monthly meetings covering
topics of relevance to women and
the challenges they may be facing in
today’s society.
• Hold annual conferences that seek
to empower women to reach their
potential.
• Work with other women’s groups
and ministries to continue to share
the Gospel.
• Help women to develop a deep faith
and belief in Jesus Christ.
• Conceptualise and implement
creative, social and educative
opportunities for women to
fellowship together, share the Word
of God, encourage each other with
testimonies and form productive
partnerships.
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Prayers To make God’s glory
… The heartfelt and
persistent prayer of a
righteous man (believer)
can accomplish much
[when put into action
and made effective by
God—it is dynamic and
can have tremendous
power].
James 5:16 (AMP)
PRAYERS FOR FAMILIES
Thank the Lord for what He is doing in
your family in the name of Jesus. Pray
that the Lord will show you loopholes in
your family life that can hurt you.
Exercise dominion over every spirit that
tries to break the peace of God in your
family.
Claim the Lord’s promise that all your
children will be taught by Him.
Pray for the outpouring of the Holy
Spirit on your children.
Pray that the children the Lord has given
us will carry the mark of His favour.
Pray that the Lord will fight the battles
of your children.
manifest in
your life
Pray that the Lord will bring godly
friends and role models in your children’s
lives.
Ask the Lord to bring godly satisfaction
into your marriage in the name of Jesus.
Pray that you would not be tired as a
parent but able to persevere until your
children win.
Prophesy into the lives of your children,
that they will manifest God’s blessing.
Thank the Lord for making His love
manifest in your marriage.
Pray that God will give a miracle to
those trusting Him for the fruit of the
womb; that they will be joyful mothers of
children.
Pray that God will give the kind of favour
that will let your children rise and call
you blessed.
Pray for the grace to remain pure as you
wait.
In the name of Jesus break the power of
the spirit of loneliness in your life.
Pray that the Lord will reveal the person
He has chosen for you.
Pray for the Lord’s deliverance from
every form of pressure and refuse to be
pressured or rushed into marriage.
Pray that your spouse will be a born
again Christian and will trust in Him.
Pray for God’s healing in your emotional,
physical and sexual life.
CAREER & BUSINESS
Decree the blessing of God over every
plan and goal for your career and
business.
Welcome the Holy Spirit to be your
senior partner and ask Him to make all
the decisions for you.
Pray that the Lord will be totally
enthroned in your heart and business to
prosper you.
Continue on page 22
Manifestation is an event,
action, or object that clearly
shows or embodies something
abstract or theoretical.
It also means the action or fact of showing
something. Two scriptures come readily
to mind. Romans 8:19 says ‘For all creation
is waiting eagerly for that future
day when God will reveal who his children
really are.’
John 1:14 tells us about Jesus. ‘So the
Word became human and made his home
among us. He was full of unfailing love and
faithfulness. And we have seen his glory, the
glory of the Father’s one and only Son.’
In verse 12 which precedes this verse, we
are told that as many as received Christ, he
gave power to become sons of God.
Nothing is of importance if it is only known
theoretically or abstractly. It will only be
useful and impactful when its influence is
visibly and tangibly felt.
The concept of the Trinity--- Father, Son
and Holy Spirit will be weakly received if it
remained an abstract or theoretical concept.
But when the Son came and they saw his
glory as of the only begotten of the Father
full of grace and truth, it settled all doubts
and questions in the heart of the inquiring
THE WORD
BECAME FLESH
[MANIFESTATION]
disciples. We as the sons of God in our days
owe it to the world and our generation to
manifest the attributes of the Father to a
dying and confused world.
This will be expressed no doubt in the fruit
of the Spirit and the Gifts of the Spirit.
The fruit of the Spirit clearly demonstrates
the character and nature of our God as
it reveals supernatural love, joy, peace,
longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
meekness and temperance.
The Gifts of the Spirit on the other hand
reveals the power of God and His dynamic
function in the affairs of men as evidenced
in the word of wisdom, word of knowledge,
faith, gifts of healing, working of miracles,
prophecy, discerning of spirits, divers kinds
of tongues and interpretation of tongues.
The disciples of old began to function
along this line because they understood
that as Jesus was, so were they also called to
function.
We must not neglect our regular
fellowshipping in church as the scripture
demands, but we have not been called to
just function within the four walls of our
churches. The whole of creation is waiting
for our contribution as sons of God.
God has given us potentially all things that
pertains to life and godliness, the onus is
on us to go out there and let the whole of
creation experience his love, his mercy and
his power.
There is no better time than now, in this
generation to come out as the light to a
dark world ridden with destructive human
philosophies and ideas. There is no better
time than now to show we are the salt of the
earth and we will not be trodden under foot
by men. This is our calling.
We are to express his nature and power
in all spheres of life, morally, financially,
in business, in government, in politics, in
education and in every community we find
ourselves. Let us live the life we have been
called to live and occupy till he comes and
then there will be a full revealing of our
sonship.
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11

Taking A Stand
Against Bullying
and cyberbullying may
Bullying be prevented with intentional
parenting. However if it does occur,
there are some ways that parents
can respond to help their kids cope.
Communicating
With Your Teenager
Allow your teen’s feelings
to touch you, and then
help him see that you truly
understand his feelings.
Preventing Bullying and Cyberbullying
Everyday, kids are bullied at school,
while engaged in extracurricular
activities and online. Therefore,
learning about preventing bullying and
cyberbullying is important. Face to face
bullying can take the form of threats,
intimidation, name-calling, spreading
rumors or excluding someone from a
group. Aggressive behavior typically
needs to be recurring in order to qualify
as bullying. However, the fear that a
single incident of brutish behavior might
happen again can extend the impact on
the victim.
Cyberbullying is a form of bullying
that’s carried out in social media
and smartphones. While not faceto-face,
it can be just as harmful. It
is very public, so word travels very
quickly. Furthermore, once images and
comments are posted, they can exist
virtually forever online. In addition,
online bullies wreak havoc anonymously,
often with little fear of being discovered
or punished. Their harassing comments
may even include recommendations that
victims harm or kill themselves.
Responding to Bullying and
Cyberbullying
The effects of bullying and cyberbullying
can be dramatic. They demolish selfesteem
and lead to depression and
anxiety that can last into adulthood.
Neurobiological research confirms that
social pain is equivalent to physical pain.
Consequently, in the most tragic cases,
teens and preteens may feel driven to
self-harm or suicide. If your teen is being
bullied, she needs help immediately.
Some things you can do include:
• Give her some tips about how to
deal with a bullying incident. For
example, use humor to defuse a
tense situation, use straightforward
language (“That’s enough!”) or, if
possible, walk away.
• Rehearse with your teen where
she can go at school if she ever
feels threatened. State a specific
location or a person such as a school
counsellor, a trusted teacher, or
administrator.
• If your child is being bullied, you
might be tempted to give free reign
to strong emotions, especially in
a meeting with school officials.
Resist the urge. Yelling or reacting
explosively may embarrass your child
and cause her to NOT tell you about
future episodes. Calm, measured
action is more likely to lead her to
want to tell you.
• Encourage your child to talk with
you or another adult when she feels
intimidated or afraid. This will help
her get help and perspective on the
other person’s behaviour to help her
end the bullying. In some situations
she may feel emotionally trapped in
feelings of fear. Therefore, talking
can sometimes help her break out of
the “loop” of fearful emotions.
© 2019 by Focus on the Family
Good communication with
teens is vital during conflict.
When we asked 5,000 adults
what they wished their parents
had done differently during times
of conflict, they gave these three
responses most often:
1. They wished their parents had
listened more.
2. They wished they could have
talked about feelings more.
3. They wished they had talked to
their parents more.
It’s interesting that all three
of those involve aspects of
communication. And as this list
suggests, good communication
during parent-teen conflict
begins with listening and not with
searching for solutions.
Emotional Communication: Listen
with Your Heart
Do you want to know one
particularly nasty myth that keeps
many people from experiencing the
tremendous benefits of effective
communication? Somewhere
along the way, they have come to
believe that real communication
occurs when they understand the
other person’s words. They equate
effective communication with
accurately parroting back the words
and phrases they hear.
But, in fact, good communication
is more than that. True
communication usually does
not occur until each partner
understands the feelings that
underlie the spoken words. People
generally feel more understood,
cared for, and connected when the
communication first focuses on
their emotions and feelings rather
than merely on their words or
thoughts.
Consider this the magic of effective
communication. Our goal must go
beyond understanding the spoken
words to grasping the emotional
nugget underlying the words. It’s
far more important to discover and
address the emotions beneath the
situation than to parrot the words
we hear. Ask yourself, “What is the
emotional impact of these words?”
not merely, “What exact words did I
just hear?”
Suppose a teen says, “I hate my
school. Everyone ignores me and I
want to be home schooled.”
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THE WINNING WOMEN MAGAZINE | MANIFEST 15

What did she mean? Consider
carefully her two sentences. The
teen used no “feeling” words but
all “thinking” words. So if you
reply,
“So what you’re saying is that
you don’t want to go to your
school any longer and you’d
rather be home schooled,” you’ve
completely missed the point.
You’ve accurately reflected to her
the words she just spoke, but you
remain completely in the dark
about her real concern — you
remain in the “head” and we want
you to move to the “heart.”
But what if you listen for the
emotions beneath the words by
listening with your heart? What if
you said, “Are you saying that you
feel ignored by the teachers and
the other students, that you don’t
matter?” Presto! This time, you’ve
“got it.” You listened beyond your
daughter’s words to her heart, to
her real concern. You’ve tapped
into her emotional message — her
fear of being ignored.
A lot of us (especially men) struggle
with this skill. Men tend to think in
a linear way: cut to the chase, get to
the bottom line. We want to solve
a problem and complete a task, not
deal with emotions. We want to figure
out how to “fix it.” Without listening
for and responding to the emotions,
however, all of the problem solving
in the world won’t get us to the real
problem.
Effective communication comes down
to listening and speaking with your
heart. When people feel understood
emotionally, they feel cared for. This
is very different from listening to
someone from the head — that is,
looking merely for the content of
the person’s words, without paying
attention to the feelings. The goal
of effective communication is to
understand the emotional message of
the speaker. You have to ask yourself,
what is this person feeling?
Taken from The DNA of Parent-Teen Relationships:
Discover the Key to Your Teen’s Heart published by
Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Copyright © 1998
and 2005 by Gary Smalley and Greg Smalley,
Psy.D. All rights reserved.
16
THE WINNING WOMEN MAGAZINE | MANIFEST

Nurturing Your Child’s
Gifts And Talents
Children need to discover
an ability or a skill they
can be good at and achieve
competence. And it’s our job
as parents to help them find it.
Look for interest in school subjects. Work with
teachers and come up with creative ways to
encourage your child to learn more about his
favourite subject. Then ask him to sample a variety
of school extracurricular activities: scouting, music,
drama, dance and horseback riding.
Activities explore an area of competence
Every child needs to be involved in an area that
interests her. Don’t over-involve her, of course, but
help her get involved in at least one area that she
enjoys. She must choose something and give it a
decent trial, sticking with it for at least a few months
to see if things will click. If they don’t, choose another
activity and try again.
The total truth about what they’re good at
A major part of competence is knowing oneself.
Your child needs to know who he is — strengths,
weaknesses and personality traits — to have
confidence and a healthy self-esteem.
Why an area of competence matters
If we fail to uncover our children’s skills,
their confidence may suffer and they’ll be
much more likely to make mistakes that
will cripple their lives.
In my practice, I see many kids who
are lazy and unmotivated. They’re not
putting forth much effort in school,
activities, healthy hobbies or their
spiritual lives. They demonstrate an
“I don’t care” attitude. The frustrated
parents tell me their kids aren’t achieving
their full potential.
A root of laziness
It can be painful to hear, but most
kids are lazy because they have no
area of competence, and therefore no
confidence. And it can become a cycle:
They’re scared of failure, so they don’t
try.
But when a child has a skill, he grows in
confidence in himself. This confidence is
infectious and will spread to other areas
of his life. It will give him the courage to
try hard in other areas where he is weak.
Perhaps a child’s skills in baseball or
science class compel him to try harder in
math, and if he doesn’t do as well there,
he still is confident because he knows
he excels in the other areas. He feeds
off that strength, and it gives him the
intestinal fortitude — the guts — to give
other life experiences his best shot.
A healthy or negative area of
competence
Kids who act out or make other terrible
decisions often haven’t found an area of
healthy competence. If your kid doesn’t
find an area of positive competence, I
guarantee he’ll find an area of negative
competence.
It’ll be easy for him to waste the precious
hours of life surfing the internet, playing
video games or watching TV. He may
find it easy to be good at drinking, drugs,
stealing and cheating. Your kid will find
something he’s good at, something he
can use to draw attention to himself and
earn approval from peers.
When children are good in a healthy
pursuit, they don’t need to be good at a
life-wasting activity. Kids who discover
a skill often discover the motivation to
work hard, developing protection from
temptation and a good understanding of
where they can contribute in our world.
‘God made you special’
How do you begin this process? First,
start telling your child that she has an
ability. The find-a-skill process takes
longer with some kids, but it’s important
that you never waver in your confidence
that there is an area in which she will
excel. Don’t say, “Well, Susie, it doesn’t
look promising. I’m not sure if you’re
good at anything.” No! Here’s what you
say: “You’ve got an ability, Susie. I know
it. We just have to find it.”
God gives every person
talents and gifts. At the point
of becoming a Christian,
each person also receives a
spiritual gift (1 Corinthians
12:7-11). We are also given
natural human abilities
and skills, and it is our
responsibility to use these
abilities in the service of
Christ (1 Peter 4:10-11).
Emphasize these truths to
your children. A child who
may express doubts that she
has abilities can recognize
God’s words affirming that
she is specially created for a
purpose. It’s not you saying it;
this is God talking.
ENCOURAGE
There are many activities
you can nudge your child
into. Sports are a great path
toward many skills. There are
school teams and city leagues
and all sorts of opportunities
in more individual sports such
as golf, tennis and martial
arts. Or introduce him to a
hobby or two: mechanics,
woodworking, sewing,
computer programming,
crafts.
To help your child paint this accurate self-portrait,
you must consistently give her the truth about
herself in all areas. Just be realistic. Don’t lie or
exaggerate. If she can’t sing, she can’t sing! I’ve seen
parents encourage their child to be a soloist when it’s
painfully obvious she doesn’t have the pipes.
So yes, this accurate view of self includes weaknesses.
Your child has weaknesses and must learn how to
deal with them. Handle these areas very carefully and
in private.
Some weaknesses, like in a particular sport, don’t
need to be worked on or corrected. Certain things are
just not that critical, and you’ll simply direct your child
to a sport or activity in which he can enjoy success.
Other weak areas, like personality traits, will need to
be addressed. Character is important, so you’ll work
with your child to help him be aware of, and change,
negative aspects of his personality.
By David Clarke
© Focus on the Family
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Speaking Your Child’s
Love Language
Children express and
receive love in different
ways — some through acts
of service; others through
affirming words; still others
through gifts, quality time
or physical touch. Each
of these expressions of
love represents a different
‘language.’
“Children receive love emotionally,”
Chapman said, “but because they are
all different, we must pay attention to
their individual needs. We must learn
to speak our children’s [love] language
if we want them to feel loved.”
We often try to pour all our children
into the same mould, Chapman said.
We go to parenting conferences
and read books. We are inundated
with great ideas that we want to
use with our children. We fail to
remember, however, that each child
is different. What works with one
may not work with another. And what
communicates love to one child may
not be received the same way by
another child.
By understanding the five love
languages, we can more easily discern
the emotional needs of our children.
Here is a brief description of each
love language:
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
Compliments such as “Your hair
really looks nice today!” or “Great
game tonight!” go a long way with
the child who thrives on praise. Your
words can focus on personality,
accomplishments, outward
appearance or anything else that
affirms. Giving a monetary reward to a
child who seeks affirmation will leave
him feeling empty.
ACTS OF SERVICE
In the early stages of life, we do
things for our children that they
can’t do for themselves. As they
get older, our love is expressed by
teaching them how to do things for
themselves. For a child with this love
language, we need to know which
acts of service are important to him.
Does he feel loved when you help
him with homework? Or teach him to
throw a ball? Once you’ve discovered
the acts of service your child most
appreciates, perform them often.
GIFTS
Children with this love language
treasure gifts as a tangible token of
affection. Unfortunately, they also
interpret a lack of gifts as a lack of
love. Your gifts don’t need to be
expensive, and they don’t need to
be given every day, but recognizing
that a child prefers to be rewarded
with a pack of gum rather than a
hug is an important step in building
communication.
QUALITY TIME
Children who speak this love
language seek undivided attention.
When they’re infants, we play on the
floor with them and roll balls back
and forth. As they get older, that
quality time is found in conversations,
bedtime stories or backyard sports.
The activity is not important; the time
together is. For a child with siblings,
it may be difficult to get one-on-one
time with Mom or Dad. He needs
to know that he is worthy of your
undivided attention.
PHYSICAL TOUCH
We’ve long known the emotional
power of physical touch. Infants
who are held fare better than
those who are not. As children
get older, they still long for
physical affection — something
as simple as a touch on the arm,
a pat on the back, a hug. These
gestures are especially important
to the child with this love
language. He wants to literally
feel your love.
Chapman recommends that as
we focus on our child’s primary
love language, we remember
to use the other four as well.
Though children receive love
best from one language, there’s
no doubt they benefit from all
expressions of unconditional
love.
Copyright © 2009 Heidi Krumenauer.
https://www.focusonthefamily.com/
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Continued from page 10
Prayers To make God’s glory
manifest in
your life
Reject every form of
discouragement even when
things don’t seem to be going
right.
Decree prosperity, increase and
life to the work of your hand.
Ask the Lord to give you a
teachable spirit; one that is
willing to learn for God given
mentors and advisors, and
one that will change where
necessary.
Bless the name of the Lord for a
vision for your own business.
Pray the Lord will use you as a
financial promoter of His work.
Ask the Lord for employees
who will portray the spirit of
excellence in everything they do.
Pray that every aspect of your
business will yield fruit in
abundance.
CAREER & BUSINESS
Pray that you will be a lender
and not a borrower in Jesus’
name.
Pray that your business will fulfil
the purpose of God.
Ask for boldness to face
interviews when taking steps
concerning you career.
Pray for your steps to be ordered
to the right people who will give
you the right counsel related to
your field.
Ask the Lord to fill your heart
with wisdom and clear direction.
Give every career battle to the
Lord and ask Him to fight for
you.
Thank God because He will
reward your pursuit with favour
and breakthrough.
Confess that you will be the
head only and not the tail in your
business and career.
SELF ESTEEM
Thank the Lord by faith that
He has set you free from the
bondage of insecurity
Thank God for creating you for
good works
Pray that you will find your true
self-worth in Christ Jesus
Ask the Lord to loose you from
every bondage of self-pity, selfishness and selfrighteousness
Thank the Lord for declaring that you are His
child and for making you complete in Him
Confess that you have dominion over any
challenge you face
Pray that the things you go through will not affect
how you perceive yourself in God
In the Name of Jesus, take authority over the
things trying to belittle you
Pray that your relationship with the Holy Spirit will
grow more intimate every day.
HEALING & HEALTH
Declare that in spite of what you see and hear
you are standing on the Word of the Lord - “By
His stripes you are healed.” (Isaiah 53:5; Matthew
8:17)
Declare that no matter what the sickness is called,
the name of Jesus is above it. (Mark 16: 17-18,
Phi 2: 9-10, Acts 3: 16)
Break the curse of sickness and disease and
command all hereditary spirits of sickness to
leave your life in the name of Jesus. (Galatians
3:13)
In the name of Jesus, cast out every spirit of
infirmity that has attacked your body. (Exodus
15:26, Psalms 91:16; 103:2-3)
Declare and affirm that you have an unbreakable
covenant with Jehovah-Rapha the Great
Physician. (Exodus 15:26) Speak healing and
strength to every part of your body in the name
of Jesus.
FASTING AND PRAYER
Get your copy of the December 2019 Prayer &
Fasting Prayer Points booklet from kicc.org.uk
(Galatians 3:13)
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