Focus on the Family Magazine - October/November 2020

NEW FROM
FOCUS
I feel betrayed!
Now what?
In Aftershock, an experienced
counselor and a therapist
share hope—and a practical
recovery plan—based on
biblical principles and leading
clinical wisdom. Find strength
as you confront infidelity and
deal with betrayal.
You can heal.
You can recover.
After the shock, what’s next?
This guide from experienced
counsellors will help women
who have discovered their
husband’s struggle with
pornography take positive,
biblically informed steps that
help them find healing for
themself, their husband and
their marriage.
<strong>Focus</strong>OnTheFamily.com/aftershock
Order online at
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or call 1.800.661.9800
TM
your marriage. Even if his record is
imperfect, you can be assured that
your relationship is important to
him if he is sincere and consistent
in following through with his recovery
plan as soon as struggles arise.
Moving toward
reconciliation
If you are not open to forgiveness
or reconciliation, your spouse’s
work in earning your trust will not
be meaningful to you. Likewise,
if you don’t take care of yourself
physically, emotionally and spiritually,
you will be unable to recognize
or receive even your mate’s best
efforts of reconciliation. You will
not have the energy to see the
changes in behavior. At that point,
both of you will be more likely to
give up on your marriage.
Of course, you’ve been through
a lot. You will need time to process
your pain and loss before you can
expect to reconcile. But when you
are ready to move toward recovery,
your steps should include nourishing
your spiritual life, working
with a professional counselor, taking
care of your physical needs and
seeking the help of a specialized
support group.
You’re facing a difficult but potentially
rewarding road ahead. With
patience, the process of rebuilding
trust is doable. As a couple matures
through recovery, they often witness
each other’s hard work and dedication
to repair the relationship, and in
turn experience hope. Restoration of
a marriage is truly possible—perhaps
even building a relationship better
than it was before! •
*Names have been changed to protect
identities.
Joann condie is a retired counseling
professional and served as a licensed
professional counselor at <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family. Geremy F. Keeton is a marriage and
family therapist at <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family. this
article is adapted from their book, Aftershock:
Overcoming his secret life with pornography,
a plan for recovery, a <strong>Focus</strong> on the Family
resource published by tyndale House
Publishers. copyright © 2020 <strong>Focus</strong> on the
Family. All rights reserved.
FREEDOM NO PORN FROM
MARRIAGE PORNOGRAPHY PODCAST
Whether In this six-part you have video struggled series, Nick with
pornography Stumbo and his or have wife, been Michelle, hurt
share by your honestly spouse’s about addiction, his cycle this of
slip-up, series hosted confession by Dr. and Greg promise, and
Erin and Smalley explain what will help eventually you start led a
journey Nick to toward find freedom healing from and his find
freedom pornography in God’s addiction. grace.
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