You also want an ePaper? Increase the reach of your titles

YUMPU automatically turns print PDFs into web optimized ePapers that Google loves.

SHE<br />


TALKS<br />

WOMEN<br />


Featuring:<br />

- - LAM HOANG MY<br />

“AMY”<br />


- KW FITNESS<br />



- MIND. BODY. META.<br />





AND MORE!<br />

Enjoy<br />







Shaneika Marie Ford<br />





mar/ap<br />


16<br />

12<br />

40<br />

182<br />

242<br />


edition<br />


87<br />



Evangela “Van” Stanley<br />

62 ALL ACCESS<br />


182 THE SAVVY ALLY<br />

194 I AM...<br />



Chloe Schnell<br />


308 IN HER OWN WORDS<br />


CORNER<br />

232 TEEN TALK<br />



276 B. MOR<br />

214 SAVON SPEAKS<br />




288 YOU MATTER<br />







Amy Houng<br />

KW Fitness<br />

A Rose Is Still A Rose<br />

Rumella Cameron<br />

Dewitt Styling<br />

Mind. Body. Meta.<br />

Angela Tewa<br />

Always Chasing Better<br />

Sacred Goddess Box<br />



The Cherry Pit<br />



282 WELL TRAIL<br />


190 SCALP NY<br />

174 ASK THE DOCTOR<br />



262 DR J’S BEAUTY<br />

274 WELLNESS 360<br />

292 HIP HEMP<br />

298 LADIOLOGY<br />



“Being powerful is like<br />

being a lady...if you have<br />

to tell people you are, your<br />

aren’t.” - Margaret Thatcher<br />

F<br />

or the “Women’s History” edition of Central NY<br />

Woman Online we are so excited to be able to bring<br />

you our latest cover woman, Shaneika Marie Ford.<br />

Visual Artist. Photographer. Entrepreneur. Mother<br />

and owner of S’Marie Photography in Syracuse<br />

NY. Read all about her inspiring story starting on<br />

page [16].<br />

Plus, you won’t want to miss all of the incredible features,<br />

women entrepreneurHERS in our SHE Hustles Talks section,<br />

new columns including “Ask Daniel Baldwin” and more that<br />

is filling the pages of this edition!<br />

For the Central NY Woman Online’s SHE Hustles Talks cover<br />

woman this edition, we have the amazing founder of Golden<br />

World Magazine, Goldenl World Group llc, Golden World<br />

pageants and all around quintessential woman entrepreneur<br />

and hustler, Lam Hoang My, but we just call her Amy. Amy<br />

Hoang is an ambitious, successful businesswoman who is a<br />

passionate innovator in the fashion, beauty and entertainment<br />

industries. Read all about this fashionista starting on page<br />

[87]. Then don’t forget to keep reading because there are so<br />

many other amazing enrepreneurs also joining us this month<br />

to tell their stories of how they are hustlin.<br />


T T<br />

On the cover of our March/April edition of Central NY Woman Online, we have<br />

visual artist, photographer, entrepreneur, mother and so much more... Shaneika<br />

Marie Ford photographed by Rob Daniels photography.<br />

Thank you for joining us for another amazing issue. Stay<br />

tuned as we launch our sister publication Buffalo Woman<br />

Online coming in April <strong>2021</strong>, atart back up with our Pop Ups<br />

in the CUSE on April 18th at the Craftsman Inn & Suites in<br />

Fayetteville. And you definitely won’t want to miss the launch<br />

of our She Hustles Talk Show on May 1st at OFC Creations<br />

featuring women from all over the country coming together<br />

to talk about business, how they are hustlin, and LOTS more.<br />

We will also be launching our semi-annual Influential Woman<br />

Online magazine where I will be sharing some of my story for<br />

the first time.<br />

This year is going to be amazing and filled with lots of new<br />

opportunities. Hope you will all join us for the ride!<br />

Kelly<br />

8 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>

{ A LOOK AT OUR TEAM }<br />









Kelly Breuer<br />

LS Jones<br />

Kelly Breuer<br />

Brody Wheeler<br />

KL Storyography<br />

Natalia Karpov<br />

S.Marie Photography<br />

Rob Daniels<br />

Sandy Arena<br />

Dr. Shanelle Benson Reid<br />

Kelli LaPage<br />

Dr. Pam Denton<br />

Angela Duncan<br />

Tammy Vreeland<br />

Tracy Simone<br />

Randy Agness<br />

Bonnie Floyd<br />

Savon Holt<br />

Rumella Cameron<br />

Jarrod Schoomaker<br />

Ellen Feldman<br />

Judi Swanson<br />

Ahlia Kitwana<br />

Dr Pebble Kranz<br />

Alexis Tearney<br />

Kirsten Soos<br />

Gabriella Rose Fiederlein<br />

Chloe Shnell<br />

Daniel Baldwin<br />

Christine Grandin<br />

Kristie Stumpf Rork<br />

Dr. Sarah F. Spiegelhoff<br />

Kelly Breuer<br />

Toni Natalie<br />

Network Rochester<br />

Devin Mack<br />

Devin Mack<br />

Kristin Bauer Gross<br />

Jeannie Gainsburg<br />

Rochester Woman ONLINE is the premier professional woman’s online publication in the greater Rochester area. Our feature articles address major topics that interest local<br />

women. Each issue includes articles on health, fashion, fitness, finance, dining, lifestyle and personal perspectives, as well as a spotlight on local area women. The electronic<br />

magazines are distributed freely through your favorite app store and will be in your inbox electronically by the first week of every month. The publication is available free of<br />

charge. Please feel free to contact publisher Kelly Breuer at 585.727.9120 or you can email us at networkrocqueen@gmail.com. Download our current media kit at www.<br />

rochesterwomanonline.com.<br />

The magazine is published 12 times a year by Rochester Woman ONLINE. Copyright © 2017 Rochester Woman ONLINE. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or<br />

republished without the consent of the publisher. Rochester Woman ONLINE is not responsible for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts, photos or artwork. All such submissions<br />

become the property of Rochester Woman ONLINE and will not be returned.

She Talks Law member perks:<br />

• Free legal education from award-winning<br />

attorneys on topics relevant to your business and<br />

life;<br />

• Industry leading panelists and presenters with<br />

special offers and opportunities to grow and<br />

succeed;<br />

• An exclusive forum to collaborate with the best<br />

women in the business;<br />

• Access to premier legal services for members of<br />

She Talks Law;<br />

• An opportunity to feature your business to other<br />

women, including being featured on Boylan<br />

Code’s social media and website;<br />

• And more!<br />

Powerful women empowering women<br />

in business and in life.<br />

She Talks Law Women’s Roundtable<br />

Join our Host and Attorney, Jennifer Aronson-Jovcevski, and a powerhouse group<br />

of women business owners, women entrepreneurs and women investors across all<br />

industries as we collaborate and empower one another.<br />

To join, RSVP by email to:<br />

jajovcevski@boylancode.com<br />

For a complete list of topics and real time<br />

information on presenters and upcoming<br />

roundtables, follow Jennifer on LinkedIn and<br />

SheTalksLaw on Facebook and Instagram.<br />

Boylancode.com<br />

Rochester | Newark | Canandaigua<br />

Attorney Advertising


}<br />



Visual Artist.Photographer. Entrepreneur.<br />

Recently, Central NY Woman Online<br />

had the pleasure of doing a Q&A with<br />

Syracuse photographer Shaneika Marie<br />

Ford, otherwise know as, S’Marie. Known<br />

for her incredible portrait photography,<br />

we were excited to know more about<br />

our latest cover woman and talk about<br />

everything that makes her such an<br />

amazing entrepreneur.<br />

Tell us about<br />

yourself...Where are<br />

you from? Tell us<br />

about your family<br />

and your background.<br />

My name is Shaneika<br />

Marie Ford and I was<br />

born and raised in<br />

Syracuse, NY. I have 3<br />

children (all boys) and<br />

one furry son named<br />

Max (Maltipoo). In<br />

addition, to being a<br />

mom and entrepreneur,<br />

I currently work as<br />

an Executive Director<br />

at a local non-profit<br />

agency. I started as the<br />

part-time receptionist<br />

straight out of high school and worked<br />

my way up. Throughout my years of<br />

being employed I also attended college<br />

on and off until I received my Master’s<br />

Degree in 2015.<br />

Leadership and entrepreneurship was<br />

always a part of my being. Being the<br />

oldest of 6 prepared me for leadership.<br />

I always felt I needed to be a good<br />

example/role model for my siblings, so<br />

I strived to be a great example for them.<br />

I am almost always able to get people<br />

to follow my lead.<br />

Entrepreneurship was something I always<br />

wanted to engage in. I remember so<br />

vividly at the age of 9 saying I wanted<br />

to be an entrepreneur. I was attending<br />

a youth program and the coordinator<br />

asked the class what we wanted to be<br />

when we grew up and I said “I want<br />

to be an entrepreneur”. So at a young<br />

age I already knew what professional/<br />

business journey I wanted to embark on.<br />

How and when did you start<br />

photography? Is it always something<br />

you wanted to do?<br />

Initially, photography started off as a<br />

hobby for me. It wasn’t something I<br />

wanted to do or even thought of. Back in<br />

2013, photography went from a hobby<br />

to an entrepreneurial endeavor when I<br />

received a lot of praise and recognition<br />

from some engagement photos I took<br />

of my sister. Once those pictures were<br />

released people were inboxing me for<br />

photo sessions. So a former business<br />

partner and I formed S&R Images. I<br />

am mainly self-taught, but I did take<br />

photography courses at OCM BOCES,<br />

Syracuse University Light Work and<br />

I attended and still do attend many<br />

online photography classes through<br />

various companies.<br />

How did you start S<br />

Marie Photography?<br />

S’Marie Photography<br />

came about in 2016<br />

when I decided to<br />

embark on my<br />

photography journey<br />

alone. S’Marie is<br />

actually just may<br />

name shortened<br />

(Shaneika Marie =<br />

S’Marie). I decided<br />

to brand my name.<br />

What is your<br />

favorite part of<br />

doing what you do?<br />

Capturing moments<br />

that will create a<br />

physical memory for families. I love<br />

to see the smile on people’s faces and<br />

the laughter they have while looking at<br />

their pictures. It also warms my heart<br />

when I see people share photos I took<br />

of their loved ones and even more so<br />

when they share photos I took of their<br />

loved ones that have passed away. I love<br />

that I was able to capture a moment in<br />

time for them that they can have and<br />

look at forever. When I realized how<br />

meaningful a physical memory was<br />

16 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 17

18 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“Entrepreneurship was something<br />

I always wanted to engage in. I<br />

remember so vividly at the age<br />

of 9 saying I wanted to be an<br />

entrepreneur.” I was attending a<br />

youth program and the coordinator<br />

asked the class what we wanted<br />

to be when we grew up and I said<br />

“I want to be an entrepreneur”.<br />

So at a young age I already knew<br />

what professional/business journey I<br />

wanted to embark on.”<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 19


“My biggest success personally was not succumbing to the statistics of teen moms. Being a<br />

teen mom presented some challenges but I prevailed.”<br />

that’s when my passion for photography<br />

turned into my purpose.<br />

Do you have any advice for other<br />

females wanting to jump in to the<br />

photography business and what the<br />

most important thing to remember is?<br />

Yes my advice would be: Don’t get<br />

discouraged about the saturated<br />

photography field. Everyone has their<br />

own lane and niche that will make them<br />

stand out from the rest. It doesn’t even<br />

have to be that you provide the highest<br />

quality images it could just be your<br />

personality that sets you apart. What<br />

God has for you is for you.<br />

Also, everyone is not your client! Never<br />

be offended or become discouraged if<br />

people do not like your work or prefer<br />

not to use your services. Some people<br />

will love it and some won’t- that’s life<br />

and its OK! I always say I prefer Aldi’s<br />

over Wegmans; Walmart over Target<br />

while others prefer Wegmans and Target<br />

(get where I’m going?). At the end they<br />

all have their preferred clientele and so<br />

will you! Thank goodness for options <br />

What has been your biggest challenge<br />

during the pandemic?<br />

The biggest challenge for me has been<br />

juggling work, homeschooling and<br />

making the tough decision to temporarily<br />

close my business. I closed for about 2<br />

months and then reopened on a limited<br />

and reduced basis.<br />

What has been your biggest success<br />

both personally and professionally<br />

and why?<br />

My biggest success personally was not<br />

succumbing to the statistics of teen<br />

20 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 21


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 23

30 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



}<br />

}<br />

“ S’Marie Photography came about in 2016 when I decided to embark on my<br />

photography journey alone.”<br />

moms. Being a teen mom presented<br />

some challenges but I prevailed.<br />

Professionally, Stepping out alone to<br />

start and grow my business. This was<br />

huge for me because I am the behind<br />

the scenes type of woman. Believe it or<br />

not I do not like attention . I’d rather<br />

be the mastermind behind the<br />

scenes . Stepping out on my<br />

own meant I had to come from<br />

the back to the front which took<br />

a lot of courage .<br />

Who has made the biggest impact<br />

on your life and why?<br />

Of course my children impact my<br />

life. It’s because of them that my<br />

strength, drive and determination<br />

to succeed is magnified. I value<br />

them and want to leave a good<br />

legacy for them. Additionally,<br />

I’d like to give recognition and<br />

credit to the environment I grew<br />

up in. My environment was a<br />

huge impact on my life. My<br />

environment (neighborhood,<br />

family dynamics, etc.) was one<br />

of such that I did not want to<br />

be like, live like, or live in! It was<br />

a huge motivator for me to stay<br />

focused and do what I needed to<br />

do to create a better life for me.<br />

What do you think is your<br />

strongest skill as a photographer?<br />

My ability to connect and build a rapport<br />

with my clients. This connection has<br />

led to referrals, returning clients and<br />

most important genuine friendships. I<br />

have met some beautiful souls whom are<br />

dear to my heart through photography.<br />

What do you know now that you didn’t<br />

know 10 years ago about yourself?<br />

How I will purposely find advantage in<br />

adversity. My life’s motto is “it is what<br />

it is” so with I always try to find some<br />

good and some opportunity in adversity.<br />

What was the biggest obstacle you<br />

faced in your life, and how did you<br />

overcome it?<br />

My biggest obstacle was presented in<br />

my teen years, when I found myself<br />

pregnant at 16. I just knew my life was<br />

“over”. When I say over I mean all the<br />

dreams and desires I had for myself were<br />

no longer obtainable. I was sure I would<br />

be everything I said I didn’t want to be<br />

and everything others around me said I<br />

would be because I was pregnant at such<br />

a young age (uneducated, on welfare,<br />

etc.). However!! As you can see I’m none<br />

of those! I always had confidence in<br />

myself. I always believed in me! I always<br />

bet on me! So no matter what I knew<br />

having a child wasn’t going<br />

to hinder me. My journey<br />

may have been altered by my<br />

vision was not. I graduated<br />

high school on time with my<br />

class. Class of 2000. I walked<br />

across that stage to where<br />

my baby was on the other<br />

side waiting for me. I went<br />

on to working full time and<br />

furthering my education. Now<br />

I presently sit in front of you<br />

as Ms. Shaneika Ford, MBA,<br />

Owner of S’Marie Photography<br />

and current Executive Director<br />

of a local non-profit which<br />

employs approximately 45<br />

employees and services 80<br />

individuals with intellectual/<br />

developmental disabilities.<br />

Are there any resources or<br />

even advice that someone<br />

has given you that have really<br />

helped you on your journey?<br />

The good ol’ practice, practice,<br />

practice advice! You cannot<br />

improve if you don’t get out there and<br />

shoot!<br />

What has been your biggest<br />

accomplishment in your career thus far?<br />

My biggest accomplishment thus far is<br />

receiving 2 construction photography<br />

contracts with a well-known and<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 31

32 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“Everyone has their own lane and niche that will make them stand out from the rest. ”<br />

prestigious company. My goal for<br />

S’Marie Photography in 2018 was to tap<br />

into larger revenue generating projects<br />

and this included receiving contracts.<br />

I put out a Facebook and Instagram<br />

New Year post and said I was looking<br />

for contracts of all sorts and lo and<br />

behold I received two not even a year<br />

apart . Construction photography<br />

also allowed me to venture into another<br />

form of photography.<br />

What is your favorite form of social<br />

media in <strong>2021</strong> and why?<br />

I tend to gravitate more towards Facebook.<br />

Facebook has been the most beneficial<br />

platform for me. It allows me to have<br />

my own business page, promote, sponsor<br />

to reach a larger audience, showcase my<br />

work, and so much more. I especially<br />

like that my clients can share the pictures<br />

that I took of them and I usually gain<br />

more followers and most importantly<br />

more clientele that way.<br />

Many people have unrealistic<br />

expectations and ideas about being a<br />

professional photographer and running<br />

their own business. How have you<br />

overcome these?<br />

I’m a realist so I wouldn’t say I had to<br />

overcome any unrealistic expectations. I<br />

didn’t have the unrealistic expectations<br />

that I would become a top photographer<br />

overnight or everyone would know my<br />

name nor did I expect that everyone<br />

would love my work. I knew it would/<br />

will take time for me to become one of<br />

the best and to be known so I knew I<br />

had to get out and put the footwork in.<br />

#17 Where do you see yourself 1 year,<br />

3years, 5 years from now?<br />

I have been saying this for the last couple<br />

of years and now I’m manifesting that<br />

I retire at 40 and go full fledge into<br />

self-employment/entrepreneurship.<br />

Along with photography, I am exploring<br />

additional wealth generating opportunities<br />

to help me reach this goal. So to answer<br />

your question, I see myself retired from<br />

working for others and solely working<br />

for me.<br />

What has been your key to successfully<br />

being in business this long and makes<br />

you not just a great photographer, but<br />

a female entrepreneur?<br />

A few things have been key to me being<br />

successful. First, I would say being a<br />

woman that is confident and eager<br />

to learn and grow has been key to my<br />

success as a photographer and female<br />

entrepreneur. Additionally, being able<br />

to achieve balance in all aspects of my<br />

life has helped as well. Lastly, being<br />

professional, open-minded, and having<br />

a positive mindset keeps me going and<br />

thriving.<br />

What makes Women’s History month<br />

special for you?<br />

Women shine 24/7-365 so we should<br />

be recognized all day every day but it’s<br />

nice to have a month solely dedicated<br />

and putting focus to recognizing our<br />

historic and present contributions to<br />

the world. Women are amazing and do<br />

amazing things. Women are killin’ it!!<br />

As a business owner, what would you<br />

say are your top priorities for both<br />

yourself personally and in your business?<br />

One priority I would share is self-care.<br />

It is so important that we take care<br />

of ourselves. We are no good to our<br />

business or our self if we don’t indulge<br />

in self-care.<br />

How do you market your business<br />

during the pandemic, and which<br />

avenues have you found to be most<br />

successful?<br />

I’m grateful for word-of-mouth<br />

marketing. A lot of business during<br />

the pandemic came from client referrals.<br />

Additionally, my social media accounts<br />

remained active so people were able to<br />

find me and view my work that way.<br />

Tell us about one event that has<br />

happened in your life that has changed<br />

you and why.<br />

Having a child at a young age changed me.<br />

I already felt I knew about responsibilities<br />

because I am the oldest child and often<br />

helped my mom but having a child<br />

of your own is a whole other level to<br />

responsibility. I was a typical teenager<br />

that liked to hang out with friends and<br />

didn’t always make the best decisions.<br />

Living in the type of environment I<br />

grew up in it was easy to get caught up<br />

in the wrong crowd. Having my son<br />

forced me to make the right decisions<br />

for my life and his life despite what my<br />

surroundings showed me. It forced me<br />

to be responsible at a higher level. I truly<br />

believe had I not had a child that no<br />

matter how determined I was to not<br />

fall victim to my environment I could<br />

have. It gave my life more purpose and<br />

drive to succeed.<br />

I want to make it clear that I’m not<br />

condoning teen pregnancy at all! I<br />

encourage all teens to wait until they<br />

are an adult to experience parenthood.<br />

Don’t take away the years you need to<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 33


“Leadership and entrepreneurship was always a part of my being. Being the oldest of 6<br />

prepared me for leadership.”<br />

experience and explore life. This is just<br />

an event in my life that changed me.<br />

This is the life plan that God has written<br />

for me to live.<br />

What have you found<br />

to be successful or a<br />

hindrance being in<br />

Central NY?<br />

A success and hindrance<br />

to being in Central<br />

NY is that it’s a small<br />

community. Everyone is<br />

connected to everyone<br />

in some shape or form.<br />

This is a good thing<br />

and bad.<br />

Do you think being a<br />

minority has helped<br />

or hindered you in<br />

business?<br />

I think it has both<br />

helped and hindered.<br />

The business as an<br />

entity may be eligible<br />

for several resources<br />

that are great even more<br />

so with having my<br />

MWBE Certification<br />

I’m afforded more<br />

opportunities but the<br />

hindering is being<br />

labeled a minority<br />

which does harm at<br />

times because of the<br />

bias and stereotypes<br />

that follow us within<br />

the system.<br />

Who has been your biggest influence or<br />

a mentor photographically and why?<br />

Again, photography was initially a<br />

hobby for me so I do not have a long<br />

standing history following photographers.<br />

However, I have been following the<br />

work of Shamayim. I also love the fact<br />

that photographer Polly Irungu created<br />

a space for black women photographers.<br />

Black women photographers is global<br />

community and directory where your<br />

work can be shared and featured for<br />

more exposure and recognition.<br />

Tell us about your most memorable<br />

photoshoot and why is stands out<br />

above others.<br />

My most memorable<br />

photo shoot was a<br />

maternity shoot that I<br />

shot at a local hiking trial.<br />

It stands out above others<br />

because the scenery was<br />

absolutely beautiful and<br />

the area the mother chose<br />

to stand held so much<br />

meaning. She choose to<br />

stand by a huge tree that<br />

roots were so visible. This<br />

tree, for her, represented<br />

the tree of life. Signifying<br />

strength, courage, new<br />

life and immortality. The<br />

roots were so prominent<br />

supporting this huge<br />

tree. For me it was very<br />

symbolic to a mother<br />

being the foundation,<br />

birthing, nurturing,<br />

raising, and forever<br />

supporting her child.<br />

34 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 35


(315) 516-0727 I VANDYKENOR



40 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />








Red is bold. Striking. The pigment of<br />

rich wines, or the color found in each<br />

dark, acidic bite from a cherry.<br />

In downtown Syracuse’s McCarthy<br />

Mercantile a new shop has<br />

found its home; the Cherry Pit<br />

Collective. The talented and<br />

creative minds of three local<br />

sellers have come together,<br />

making a splash in the<br />

underground shopping center.<br />

Despite the cool, industrial<br />

aura that encompasses the<br />

mercantile, the Cherry Pit<br />

caught my eye with its warm<br />

glow the moment I came<br />

down the stairs. Perhaps it<br />

was the cozy layout with a<br />

vintage room divider, carpets,<br />

and a record player. Or, the<br />

caring way each garment hung<br />

on the racks in harmony,<br />

echoing the cheerfulness of<br />

a rainbow. Maybe it was the<br />

seamless blend of three very<br />

distinct styles, ones that had<br />

me digging through the rows<br />

of outfits I adored and loved<br />

to mix and match. Whatever<br />

the reason, the eye for detail<br />

possessed by Abby Minicozzi,<br />

Michelle Pfaff, and Chloe<br />

Schnell has carved out an<br />

undeniable corner underneath<br />

the Wildflowers Armory.<br />

The three women met during<br />

their weekend popups and decided to<br />

take the plunge and open a shop. In<br />

addition to selling vintage pieces, each<br />

Cherry Pit designer is preparing to dive<br />

into upcycling, a realm of fashion in<br />

which they are all clearly capable. They<br />

have found a sense of togetherness in<br />

their goals, and this has translated to an<br />

overall approach toward their business<br />

model. Right away, the Cherry Pit<br />

has had its customers walking out the<br />

door with reusable tote bags, branded<br />

with a classy logo while promoting an<br />

ecological mindset. Not only that, but<br />

fifty percent of the proceeds for each bag<br />

are donated monthly to the Vera House,<br />

a foundation seeking to provide resources<br />

for victims of abuse, as well as education<br />

on its many forms. To give back to the<br />

community, and instill trust in their<br />

shoppers, the Cherry Pit<br />

girls will be posting these<br />

receipts monthly for full<br />

transparency.<br />

However, this emphasis<br />

on unity hasn’t stripped<br />

the personalities of Abby,<br />

Michelle, or Chloe away.<br />

Prior to this endeavor,<br />

each woman has<br />

dedicated themselves to<br />

their individual fashion<br />

brands.<br />

Michelle Pfaff is the<br />

founder of Fawnd<br />

Vintage. A tall, curlyhaired<br />

lady with a<br />

commanding presence,<br />

Michelle has always had<br />

ambition, and an interest<br />

in clothing, even at a<br />

young age. In high school<br />

she started a fashion club,<br />

winning a department<br />

award her senior year.<br />

Michelle went on to<br />

pursue an education at<br />

the Fashion Institute of<br />

Technology, graduating<br />

in 2018 with a Bachelor<br />

of Science Degree in<br />

Entrepreneurship and<br />

Ethics and Sustainability. Upon returning<br />

to Syracuse in 2020, Fawnd began,<br />

taking inspiration from Paris and<br />

Barcelona while integrating clothing<br />

from her own collection. Michelle<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 41




“Red is bold. Striking. The pigment of rich wines, or the color found in each dark, acidic<br />

bite from a cherry.”<br />

brings a romantic, bohemian style to<br />

the Cherry Pit, blending earth tones<br />

with feminine patterns and florals.<br />

This mesh of balanced colors and<br />

practical pieces doesn’t mean Michelle<br />

is afraid of the bright and the unique,<br />

however. Like her co-founders, she<br />

is a fan of red, her favorite shade<br />

being Persian.<br />

Abigail, Abby, Minicozzi is currently<br />

attending Syracuse University. Her<br />

love for clothing led her to collect<br />

more pieces than she knew what to<br />

do with. Abby has now launched a<br />

mini online business and fashion<br />

label within the Cherry Pit called<br />

Metamodernity. Drawn to movements<br />

from many different decades, Abby has<br />

always wanted to prioritize respect for<br />

tradition while gaining an instinct for<br />

what’s coming next. The very name<br />

of her brand encapsulates a style that<br />

renews bits and bobbles from the past<br />

while continuing to create and design<br />

outfits for an everchanging world.<br />

Pieces that are available for purchase<br />

46 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


}<br />

“ Despite the cool, industrial aura that encompasses the mercantile, the Cherry Pit caught<br />

my eye with its warm glow the moment I came down the stairs.”<br />

that are available for purchase through<br />

Abby’s line are great for a busy student,<br />

without sacrificing style or comfort.<br />

Imagine a satin long sleeve button-up<br />

with sixties-style flowers, but a modern,<br />

flattering cut; a retro, futuristic approach.<br />

Forward-thinking and enthusiastic, Abby’s<br />

youth has led to success in college and<br />

an optimism that is unlikely to slow,<br />

no matter what is thrown at her. Abby<br />

also has an affinity for red, though her<br />

preferred shade is maroon.<br />

Chloe Schnell has already had a<br />

substantial career in fashion, designing<br />

her first collection for a runway show at<br />

fourteen. Despite the ups and downs of<br />

the industry, Chloe has an unbreakable<br />

spirit that has at times dimmed but has<br />

never gone out. Her tastes, and her own<br />

contributions to the industry, can best<br />

be described as possessing a flair for the<br />

dramatic. Chloe has learned to thrive<br />

within unorthodox trends, without<br />

lacking knowledge on all the stylists<br />

that have come before her. Her favorite<br />

shade of red is scarlet.<br />

The Cherry Pit has had a very successful<br />

first month, and the founders only hope<br />

to continue growing, as well as providing<br />

opportunities for other artists.<br />

Photography by Natalia Karpov. @<br />

TheNatLens<br />

48 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>




In America alone, fashion is a multibillion<br />

dollar industry, as well as an<br />

artistic outlet for countless visionaries.<br />

However, it’s not all about the glitter.<br />

Clothing is first and foremost a<br />

necessity. Designers who<br />

want to survive within an<br />

ever-changing industry<br />

need to keep thinking<br />

about next steps. So,<br />

where do you find an<br />

artist who’s practical with<br />

textiles while daring to<br />

go against conventional<br />

trends? Look no further<br />

than Chloe Schnell.<br />

Ambitious, bright, and<br />

the personification of the<br />

avant-garde, Chloe Schnell<br />

has already had an eyeopening<br />

and successful<br />

start to her career; and,<br />

she’s only twenty-three.<br />

Schnell’s first step into<br />

the fashion world began<br />

at fourteen with her own<br />

runway show. Through<br />

this, she was introduced<br />

to Jennifer Diederich, a<br />

designer from Syracuse<br />

NY whose collections<br />

and time on Project<br />

Runway have earned her<br />

recognition. Through her<br />

experienced colleague’s<br />

support, Schnell ventured<br />

to New York City for an<br />

internship. Soon, she was knee-deep in<br />

fabric and garments, running errands,<br />

and even modeling in Diederich’s<br />

2012 collection, until her return to<br />

Syracuse.<br />

Schnell’s second collection was shown<br />

at a trunk show in Armory Square,<br />

consisting of six prom-style dresses,<br />

two of which sold right then and<br />

there. Her third collection, a tenpiece,<br />

all-white line, was showcased<br />

at the Oncenter in the winter of<br />

2013. Her love for vinyl fabrics<br />

and odd shapes began to play a role<br />

in her design approach. Two years<br />

later, the landmark theatre offered<br />

a first look at her EGG collection,<br />

utilizing spherical influences and a<br />

yellow, brown, and white palette. By<br />

eighteen, not only did she have six<br />

collections under her belt,<br />

they were all handmade<br />

and one-of-a-kind.<br />

Schnell has made it<br />

clear; “I work with single<br />

pieces. I have never massproduced<br />

my work. It feels<br />

more special that way.”<br />

After high school, where<br />

else would a young<br />

designer with clear talent<br />

and passion go than the<br />

Fashion Institute of<br />

Technology? This path was<br />

one Schnell had always<br />

dreamed of. With her<br />

body of work, it seemed<br />

she would be nothing<br />

shy of a shoo-in. Yet,<br />

Schnell’s excitement was<br />

soon crushed. FIT denied<br />

her application.<br />

However, Schnell’s<br />

optimistic flame was far<br />

from burning out.<br />

Moving to Brooklyn, she<br />

knew that the best thing<br />

she could do for herself<br />

was to continue working<br />

in any facet of fashion she<br />

could. Finding positions at vintage<br />

shops and artists’ markets kept her<br />

communication and sewing skills<br />

sharp. The disappointment following<br />

FIT’s rejection only made her work<br />

50 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


{ <strong>CNY</strong> INSPIRING WOMAN }<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 51

52 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“Clothing is first and foremost a<br />

necessity. Designers who want to<br />

survive within an ever-changing<br />

industry need to keep thinking<br />

about next steps. So, where do you<br />

find an artist who’s practical with<br />

textiles while daring to go against<br />

conventional trends? Look no<br />

further than Chloe Schnell. ”<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 53

54 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“Buy second hand, buy local. F*** fast fashion. Support your local designer.”<br />

harder. By Christmas, Schnell saw<br />

herself boldly posing in an advert<br />

displayed on New York’s L-train.<br />

The next opportunity she had to<br />

reapply, she did, and this time she<br />

received an acceptance letter from<br />

FIT. Schnell went on to design two<br />

more unique collections;<br />

the ZIG-ZAG in 2016, and<br />

the Teletubbies Collection<br />

in 2018.<br />

Unfortunately, despite the<br />

opportunities her dream<br />

school provided, Schnell’s<br />

time at FIT was not without<br />

its slew of challenges.<br />

Living in the city was<br />

expensive. Throwing<br />

herself into her work meant<br />

sacrifices. Coupled with<br />

the competitiveness of<br />

academia preparing her<br />

for an industry she was<br />

starting to lose faith in,<br />

Schnell was left feeling<br />

isolated and, at times,<br />

defeated. It was hard to<br />

find happiness in creating<br />

when the truth about the<br />

directions her career could<br />

take were laid out in front<br />

of her; “The ridiculous<br />

markups, the exploitation<br />

of workers, the praising of<br />

over-exaggerated egos. I<br />

spent a while processing the<br />

negative reactions from my professors,<br />

who I told I wanted to be ethical<br />

and sustainable. I came very close<br />

to giving up on fashion altogether.”<br />

Like many who want to make a<br />

difference, Schnell wanted to do<br />

what felt right in her heart. Yet,<br />

those who are most effective are not<br />

rule-breakers; they are instead those<br />

who learn the rules so they can make<br />

new ones.<br />

Chloe Schnell now has a new dream.<br />

She doesn’t just want to just sell<br />

her designs, she wants her business<br />

model to exemplify consideration as it<br />

confronts the established and orthodox<br />

approaches. Having always loved<br />

creating custom clothing, Schnell<br />

wants to someday open an in-house<br />

garment production store. A store<br />

that will have its own seamstresses,<br />

its own designers, its own team who,<br />

prior, “have been affected negatively<br />

by the garment production industry.<br />

I want to ensure a positive,<br />

safe, working environment<br />

where employees make a<br />

living wage.”<br />

Presently, Schnell is<br />

working with her clients<br />

to make custom clothing,<br />

continuing to shape this<br />

business model into a<br />

reality. Her mother, Pam<br />

Schnell, has a professional<br />

sewing service, whose<br />

first custom collection<br />

was designed by Chloe<br />

following her graduation<br />

from FIT. Idioms and<br />

Aphorisms<br />

was an eight-piece dress<br />

line, basing garments on<br />

phrases such as, all eyes on<br />

me, which is pictured here.<br />

While her love for fashion<br />

design has returned, and a<br />

renewed sense of optimism<br />

has been garnered, Schnell<br />

has one current request for<br />

designers and consumers;<br />

“Pay attention to tags. Where was it<br />

made? Whose hands participated in its<br />

construction? Is the price outrageously<br />

low? Buy second hand, buy local.<br />

F*** fast fashion. Support your local<br />

designer.”<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 55


}<br />

58 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>




It’s interesting the process of being<br />

in a magazine. You sit down and do<br />

an interview, or sometimes multiple<br />

interviews, then there’s the photoshoot<br />

and the many things we talk about<br />

and learn about each other on that<br />

day.<br />

As a reader, you don’t see all of<br />

the “behind the scenes” that<br />

goes on especially between<br />

the subject and writer, and<br />

you certainly don’t get to ask<br />

any of the questions. After the<br />

article comes out, boom...<br />

thousands of inquiries and<br />

questions follow.<br />

Because I live my life in<br />

service, I approached Kelly<br />

Breuer and asked her, “Could<br />

I write an article for your<br />

magazine monthly”? I want to<br />

give my experience, strength<br />

and hope to those who may<br />

be able to benefit from it.<br />

Kelly said, “yes”, so here we<br />

go! Ask away...don’t be shy, I<br />

will answer anything.<br />

So here we go. #1 Does he<br />

still plan on opening a rehab<br />

facility on the north shore?! If<br />

so how can I help? - Jennafer<br />

Kelly<br />

Daniel: Jennifer, the North<br />

Shore Rehab idea is still on the table.<br />

The problem is getting people behind<br />

it that live near where the rehab<br />

center would be.<br />

What I get is, “We dont want a bunch<br />

of druggies living near us.”<br />

Well guess what people, the same<br />

kids that are robbing your homes<br />

and cars who live on your block are<br />

the kids I would help in the rehab.<br />

It’s a bad problem. Let’s strap our<br />

boots on and clean it up.<br />

#2 Why are they’re so few actor’s<br />

and actresses with disabilities in the<br />

entertainment industry? And can<br />

you get me his autograph lol. - Tom<br />

Turner<br />

Daniel: Hi Tom, I think there are<br />

more actors and famous people with<br />

disabilities than you may realize. I<br />

believe the problem lies more with<br />

why it is not more publicized that<br />

they are challenged.<br />

How inspirational it<br />

is to see an individual<br />

overcome their<br />

obstacles.<br />

Hers a list of some<br />

of those who have<br />

achieved greatness.<br />

Including:<br />

- personality disorders<br />

(Billie Eilish)<br />

- famous people in<br />

wheelchairs (Stephen<br />

Hawking)<br />

- famous people with<br />

learning disabilities<br />

(Tom Cruise)<br />

- celebrities with<br />

physical disabilities<br />

(Stevie Wonder)<br />

- famous people with<br />

learning disabilities<br />

(Chris Rock)<br />

- other successful<br />

people with disabilities<br />

(Franklin Delano<br />

Roosevelt)<br />

#3 As a multi-award<br />

winning screenwriter, I’m starting to<br />

look for either an agent or a manager.<br />

I was just nominated for the 12th<br />

time in only 3 years for Best Original<br />

Screenplay (this time at the Beverly<br />

Hills Film Festival for a comedy I<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 59


“I want to give my experience, strength and hope to those who may be able to benefit from<br />

it. ”<br />

screenwriting awards in Burbank, LA and<br />

elsewhere. It’s time to find representation<br />

but I don’t know anyone. Can Daniel<br />

recommend someone? I am very serious<br />

about this as a professional move. -<br />

Bridgette Yaxley<br />

Daniel: Well Bridgette, congratulations<br />

on your success. It sounds like finding<br />

an agent shouldn’t be that hard for<br />

you at all.<br />

I can help you on your journey for<br />

sure. I’ll privately message you with<br />

an introduction or two if you like.<br />

Let me advise you and others on how<br />

you pick the right agent or manager. I<br />

think it starts like many relationships<br />

in life. Do you feel comfortable with<br />

this person? Do you like them? Can<br />

you communicate freely with them?<br />

Do they have the same vision and<br />

goals as you? Yes it sounds like dating<br />

a little bit but actually?<br />

This is an intense partnership that<br />

can often last for years and have a<br />

dramatic outcome on your career.<br />

You want someone who is going to<br />

say your name everyday.<br />

Ask Daniel at acemanhead@mac.com<br />

60 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 61

62 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />







Dr. Shanelle R. Benson Reid, President<br />

and CEO of the ACCESS Global Family<br />

of Companies, Devoted Educator and<br />

Serial Entrepreneur has spent her adult life<br />

encouraging others, cultivating relationships<br />

and advocating for the underserved.<br />


Dr. Benson Reid earned an Associate of<br />

Arts in Liberal Studies from San Bernardino<br />

Valley Community College, a Bachelor<br />

of Arts in Sociology from California State<br />

University, San Bernardino (CSUSB)<br />

and a Master of Arts in Education from<br />

CSUSB as well. Dr. Benson Reid earned<br />

her Doctorate in Organizational Leadership<br />

from the University of La Verne.<br />

Her academic achievements and life<br />

experiences, prepared her for a career in<br />

assessing, designing and implementing<br />

programs to address equity and social<br />

awareness in both public and private<br />

educational settings.<br />


However, her leadership extends beyond<br />

the schoolhouse to more recent feats of<br />

entrepreneurship as the President and CEO<br />

of ACCESS Global Group, where her<br />

mission remains grounded in relationship<br />

building and community service.<br />

ACCESS Global Group is a Consulting Firm<br />

that addresses organizational challenges in the<br />

areas of Management Consulting, Executive<br />

Coaching, Professional Development, Public<br />

Relations, Legal Analysis, Human Resources<br />

Compliance and Talent Acquisition. ACCESS<br />

Global Group specializes in meeting the needs<br />

of the organizations while simultaneously<br />

meeting the needs of the stakeholders.<br />

Possessing a fervent commitment to economic<br />

development, Dr. Benson Reid launched<br />

ACCESS Dental Laboratories with her<br />

husband, Mr. Todd R. Reid, Sr. ACCESS<br />

Dental Laboratories is a full-service dental<br />

laboratory that specializes in the design of<br />

crowns, bridges, partials, dentures, night<br />

guards, implants and veneers.<br />


Dr. Benson Reid’s unique connection<br />

to the City of Syracuse and District 14<br />

enables her to build bridges and empower<br />

stakeholders while advocating for resources<br />

and representation. Likewise, her passion<br />

for people and commitment to community<br />

has prepared her for this new journey.<br />

With a desire to advance Children and<br />

Family Services, Access<br />


to Healthcare, Equity<br />

in Education, Employment Restoration<br />

/ Opportunities and Environmental<br />

Sustainability, Dr. Benson Reid is poised to<br />

represent District 14 of Onondaga County.<br />


Children and Family Service<br />

From medical testing and vaccines to<br />

therapy and counseling, Dr. Benson Reid<br />

believes there must be equitable access to<br />

exceptional, comprehensive children and<br />

family service across Onondaga County.<br />


As a business owner, Dr. Benson Reid<br />

recognizes the benefit of economic<br />

development and realizes Onondaga County<br />

offers attractive incentives to local, regional<br />

and national businesses. However, she<br />

believes priority must be given to existing<br />

businesses.<br />


One of the many advantages of operating a<br />

business in Onondaga County is enormous<br />

tax incentives. As a business owner, Dr.<br />

Benson Reid recognizes the need for economic<br />

development but she also recognizes the<br />

need for a balanced economic plan that<br />

not only benefits corporations but also<br />

benefits constituents. Tax incentives should<br />

be contingent on the number of people<br />

hired with competitive salaries and benefit<br />

packages as well as the overall economic<br />

contribution to the community.<br />


As it stands, there is a disconnect between<br />

the people who live in District 14 and the<br />

decisions that are being made on behalf of<br />

District 14. This must change. The citizens<br />

must have access to information that will<br />

undoubtedly impact their current and future<br />

well-being, as well as the representative who<br />

is charged with speaking on behalf of the<br />

citizens of District 14. Transparent access<br />

and availability is the minimum.<br />


Redistricting has been and will continue to<br />

be an important discussion. Gerrymandering<br />

is typically used for gaining a competitive<br />

advantage. To avoid improprieties,<br />

redistricting should be in the hands of<br />

nonpartisan individuals, committees and<br />

/ or organizations.<br />


With open fields, distinctive wildlife and<br />

close-knit communities, Onondaga County<br />

is a great place to call home. Corporations<br />

that choose to do business in District 14<br />

must understand the need for environmental<br />

sustainability and commit to adhering to<br />

the highest environmental standards.<br />

THE TEAM<br />

Dr. Benson Reid is committed to serving the<br />

residence of District 14 as well as Onondaga<br />

County. Her personal motto is “inspire<br />

individuals to pursue self-discovery, empower<br />

them to be innovative, progressive and<br />

revolutionary in thought and motivate them<br />

to be global activists.” Dr. Benson Reid<br />

encourages self-analysis and self-assessment<br />

while promoting innovative and progressive<br />

designs for change and implementing<br />

strategies for sustained success.<br />

Looking to join the team? We would be<br />

honored to have you!<br />

From Door-to-Door Canvasing and Making<br />

Phone Calls to Candidate Meet and Greets<br />

and Campaign Fundraisers, Together, Let’s<br />

Make Our Next Day Our Best Day!<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 63





In this month’s “women’s history” edition<br />

of Central NYWoman Online, we have an<br />

incredibly inspiring woman, also known<br />

by many as a true Rochester “staple”. She<br />

has been helping others in her community<br />

and giving back selflessly for over 20<br />

years. She is the People’s Choice Kitchen<br />

owner, a single mom, a true<br />

woman entrepreneur and<br />

well, all around empowering<br />

woman...please welcome<br />

Evangela Stanley, but you<br />

can call her Van. She is<br />

the epitome of a strong<br />

and giving woman and is<br />

always hustling to help others.<br />

I am so excited that we have<br />

such an all-around amazing<br />

woman in the local Rochester<br />

community for you to<br />

stop in when you come to<br />

town. I had the pleasure to<br />

sit down and talk with her<br />

and find out just who she<br />

is. Her big smile greeting<br />

me when I walked through<br />

her doors and she was so<br />

excited for her cover shoot.<br />

After all she was celebrating<br />

20 years in business and<br />

just received the key to the<br />

city from Mayor Lovely<br />

Warren. It was heartwarming<br />

to see some of her friends joining us<br />

to support her, including her son<br />

Egypt that I had the pleasure to meet.<br />

We barely scratched the surface of this<br />

incredible woman ‘s journey and story<br />

during our interview, but we hope you<br />

enjoy what she had to tell us. Make sure<br />

to stop by 507 Chili Ave and say hi and<br />

while you are there, don’t forget to order<br />

their award-winning jerk salad! Did I<br />

mention she has the best Jamaican food I<br />

have ever tasted? All I can say is I may be<br />

addicted now and stopping in every week!<br />

So, you are known as a “staple” in the<br />

Rochester community having started<br />

your business in 2001 in the heart of<br />

the city of Rochester. Tell our readers<br />

a little bit about Evangela “Van”<br />

Stanley and you how this all started.<br />

Thanks for the huge compliment from<br />

the community. Being called a “staple”<br />

is truly more than I could have ever<br />

hoped for. Evangela “Van” Stanley<br />

(me) is a single mother of a 20-yearold<br />

son Egypt, a business owner, a<br />

people’s peron. After graduating from<br />

East High School, I achieved went to<br />

Bryant & Straton College for two years.<br />

I have always had a love for customer<br />

service and people; I worked for UPS for<br />

five years, Strong Memorial<br />

Hospital for three years, and<br />

also worked for Xerox for<br />

another four years as well.<br />

All my major jobs were based<br />

in customer service for large<br />

corporations with high traffic.<br />

What made you decide<br />

to open the People’s<br />

Choice Kitchen? Where<br />

did you come up with the<br />

name for the restaurant?<br />

I decided to open up a<br />

Caribbean Restaurant after<br />

numerous requests and pleads<br />

after friends and family would<br />

see and taste my fiancé’s<br />

island food. My fiancé grew<br />

up watching and helping<br />

his mother in her restaurant<br />

back in sweet Jamaica.<br />

I still laugh about the story<br />

behind finding the name<br />

for the restaurant “People’s<br />

Choice Kitchen”. We were<br />

inspired after watching the movie “Shaft<br />

“. My fiancé loved the character Peoples<br />

Hernandez. So, that is where People’s<br />

choice came in. It just seemed to fit.<br />

Tell us about what it was like<br />

starting a business 20 years<br />

ago as a minority female.<br />

Starting a restaurant in 2001 was<br />

66 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 67

“I honestly don’t believe I<br />

would change anything<br />

about my career path.<br />

I have learned so much<br />

along the way and the<br />

good out weighs the<br />



“I still laugh about the story behind finding the name for the restaurant “People’s Choice<br />

Kitchen”. We were inspired after watching the movie “Shaft”. My fiancé loved the<br />

character Peoples Hernandez.”<br />

very exciting but also nerve racking<br />

because we were warned it was<br />

extremely hard work. I took a couple<br />

of business classes in college, but now<br />

I was going into uncharted territory.<br />

What has been your key to successfully<br />

being in business for two decades?<br />

I believe the key to my success<br />

was growing up in a house with<br />

a father that was a very hardworking<br />

man that instilled in<br />

us integrity, family values and<br />

dedication and a praying mother.<br />

What is your restaurant’s<br />

specialty? What are you known<br />

for?<br />

My specialty at “People’s Choice<br />

is my jerk chicken; however,<br />

my restaurant is also known<br />

for our famous “Jerk Chicken<br />

Salad. It also allows you to be<br />

bad and eat healthy at the same<br />

time. Many of my clients shared<br />

with me that our Jerk Chicken<br />

Salad tastes better here at the<br />

restaurant than back in the<br />

islands of Jamaica. We take<br />

each herb and spice seriously.<br />

What made you decide<br />

to focus on Jamaican<br />

food at the People’s Kitchen?<br />

This is a very easy question for me;<br />

I decided on Jamaican food because<br />

my fiancé was born and raised in<br />

sweet Jamaica. When he arrived in<br />

the United States, he brought along<br />

all of his mother’s secret recipes<br />

with him from her restaurant.<br />

As a business owner, what would<br />

you say are your top priorities for<br />

both your personally and business?<br />

Some of my top rituals and priorities for<br />

myself are to always be considerate of<br />

other people’s time; being punctual and<br />

reliable is a must for me. Consistency is<br />

also a must for a restaurant business and<br />

being friendly should come naturally.<br />

How have you marketed your business<br />

during the pandemic, and which avenues<br />

have you found to be most successful?<br />

Keeping my restaurant in the forefront<br />

in a competitive market keeps me in<br />

the lab while others are sleeping or<br />

traveling. I am continually re-investing<br />

back into the restaurant. I constantly<br />

try to come up with creative ways to<br />

give back to my community. I love<br />

the response from using different radio<br />

stations and social media to captivate<br />

different types of people’s attention.<br />

Tell us about one event that has<br />

happened in your life that has<br />

changed you and why.<br />

This question is a little more<br />

challenging and very personal to<br />

my clients, family and myself; I<br />

am a survivor of an armed robbery<br />

at my restaurant and now dealing<br />

with a very broken system. I hope<br />

no other business owner has to<br />

experience that violating feeling,<br />

which motivated me to give back<br />

even more. The outpour from the<br />

community was surreal. Since then,<br />

we had to change and upgrade<br />

our system to some state-of-theart<br />

equipment inside and out.<br />

If you had the chance to start your<br />

career over again, would you do<br />

anything differently and why?<br />

I honestly don’t believe I would<br />

change anything about my<br />

career path. I have learned so<br />

much along the way and the<br />

good out weighs the bad. I have<br />

overcome challenges that did not<br />

seem possible, but my strong<br />

faith and belief system carried me<br />

through many storms. I will never let<br />

me circumstance define my destiny.<br />

Who has been your greatest inspiration?<br />

This question brings a huge smile across<br />

my face because my greatest inspiration<br />

happens to be my beautiful and sweet<br />

mother. “My mother has taught me to<br />

walk by faith and not by sight.”<br />

70 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 71

72 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“My specialty at “People’s Choice is my jerk chicken; however, my restaurant is known for<br />

our famous “Jerk Chicken Salad, it also allows you to be bad and eat healthy at the same<br />

time.”<br />

What is one thing that<br />

you feel defines success?<br />

Success for me is knowing God is in<br />

the mix and allowing others to see<br />

and witness the same joy so they too<br />

can pass it forward to someone else.<br />

Success for me and my fiancé was to<br />

build a strong foundation for our son<br />

by leaving him a legacy. But it was also<br />

breaking strong generational holds by<br />

passing on health and wealth to<br />

the next generation to follow.<br />

Tell us about “Soccer Sam<br />

Fantauzzo” and how you were<br />

able to get your sauces into<br />

Rochester’s famous Salvatore’s<br />

Old Fashioned Pizzeria’s.<br />

I thank God, and I’m grateful<br />

for Soccer Sam listening to Bob<br />

Lonsberry live talk radio show.<br />

Once he heard Bob mention how<br />

excellent our famous jerk sauce<br />

taste on Bob’s show; Soccer Sam<br />

reached out to me and indicated<br />

that he strongly believed my<br />

jerk sauce would be great at his<br />

Salvatore Pizzeria’s, which brought<br />

music to my ears. I am so glad<br />

he was tuned into Bob’s show<br />

that day to hear about People’s<br />

Choice Kitchen. The rest is history!<br />

Where do you see your<br />

business 5 and 10 years from<br />

now? Any plans to franchise?<br />

My 5-year plan consists of me opening<br />

another restaurant on the East side of<br />

the city where I was born and raised.<br />

I would also love to add more stores<br />

to carry my jerk sauces. My 10-year<br />

plan is to successfully train my son<br />

for the full operation so that I can<br />

confidently transition the business to<br />

him. As far as franchising goes, I have<br />

mentioned it to my sister in Florida<br />

for many years. I would definitely<br />

continue to entertain those thoughts.<br />

Do you think being a minority has<br />

helped or hindered you in business?<br />

Being a minority business owner<br />

definitely has not hindered me all. I have<br />

successfully operated my restaurant for<br />

20 years in the inner city. My clientele<br />

comes from all types of backgrounds<br />

and we treat them all the same.<br />

What is one thing you have done that<br />

not many people know about you?<br />

I enjoy going into the malls to see<br />

who I could randomly bless that day. I<br />

generally look for teenagers that I would<br />

offer to pay their bill or tell them to<br />

pick out more items so I could pay for<br />

them; the look on their faces is priceless.<br />

What is one piece of advice<br />

you have been giving that has<br />

helped shape who you are?<br />

I received a lot of advice from my mother.<br />

We have a very close and strong bond<br />

together. I cherish all of her strong<br />

values and most importantly,<br />

her advice to us to always<br />

put God first and he will<br />

lead me down the right path.<br />

What would be one<br />

word to describe you?<br />

If I had one word to choose to<br />

describe myself; it would be<br />

“compassionate.” I truly love to<br />

encourage and see others happy.<br />

Has the pandemic helped<br />

or hindered your business?<br />

How have you had to pivot<br />

to keep business going?<br />

Like so many other businesses<br />

and especially restaurants, we<br />

took a hard hit too. We are still<br />

feeling the pandemic’s impact,<br />

but we are so grateful we did<br />

not lose any family members<br />

or customers to Covid-19.<br />

We are thankful for our loyal<br />

customers continuing to support my<br />

business and helping us keep the doors<br />

open so we can also bless others to pay<br />

what they can afford.<br />

What would be one bit of advice<br />

you would give to young women<br />

wanting to start their own restaurant<br />

business?<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 73

74 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 75


“Success for me and my fiancé was to build a strong foundation for our son by leaving a<br />

legacy for Egypt and also by breaking generational strong holds by passing on health and<br />

wealth to the next generation to follow.”<br />

The advice I would share with a young<br />

woman would be to invest in their future<br />

and love what you do but most of all<br />

stay determined and focus. You have to<br />

be passionate about your business this<br />

might sound easy, but it is so important<br />

to be a people-person is just how it goes<br />

in order to succeed.<br />

What is the most favorite thing about<br />

what you do?<br />

My favorite thing I enjoy doing in my<br />

business is opening a customer’s tray in<br />

front of them and allowing the herbs and<br />

spices to speak for themselves. I love to<br />

witness the expressions and excitement<br />

of their face when they see their food.<br />

It brings great satisfaction to me<br />

What is the most favorite thing about<br />

what you do?<br />

My favorite thing I enjoy doing in my<br />

business is opening a customer’s tray in<br />

front of them and allowing the herbs and<br />

spices to speak for themselves. I love to<br />

witness the expressions and excitement<br />

of their face when they see their food. It<br />

brings great satisfaction to me.<br />

Other side notes...<br />

I forgot to mention that if it wasn’t for<br />

Soccer Sam, Palmer’s Market,, Bob<br />

Lonsberry, and Boss Sauce I wouldn’t<br />

have been able to feed 200 people for<br />

Thanksgiving for free.<br />

Plus, my Angel Tree during the holidays,<br />

we were able to provide over 200 toys<br />

to kids in need thanks to Soccer Sam<br />

and his generosity.<br />

I also do something called Sisters<br />

Giving Smiles. I reached out to several<br />

salon owners, to pamper women from<br />

Alternative for Battered Women and I<br />

catered the food.<br />

Van also works a lot with domestic<br />

violence organizations and victims.<br />

When I asked why, she said, “ My<br />

oldest sister Sandra Stanley whom has<br />

passed away. She suffered many years<br />

of abuse from her boyfriend. He once<br />

pushed her through a glass window at a<br />

hotel. Surgeons donated their services to<br />

reconstruct her face. That’s one reason I<br />

enjoyed giving back to battered women.<br />

I received several proclamations giving<br />

back for this cause and I will continue<br />

to do anything I can to help.”

80 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



}<br />


RORK?<br />


She is a 50-year-old Writer, Curve<br />

model, and Social Media influencer<br />

who was diagnosed with Breast Cancer<br />

in November 2020. She moved from<br />

New Hampshire back her hometown<br />

of Cape Vincent, New York in the<br />

fall of 2019 to help care for family.<br />

She lives with her husband in a large<br />

farmhouse next door to her parent’s<br />

home and farmland. Together, they<br />

have two beautiful scientific<br />

miracles, one born by IVF<br />

and the other FET, as well as<br />

an adopted rescue dog, and<br />

three cats.<br />

“Cancer During COVID-19:<br />

This is My Fight Song.”<br />

“Like a small boat<br />

On the ocean<br />

Sending big waves<br />

Into motion<br />

Like how a single word<br />

Can make a heart open<br />

I might only have one match<br />

But I can make an explosion.”<br />

Early morning, November<br />

18th, I sat alone in an<br />

examination room at the<br />

Women’s Wellness and Breast<br />

Care Center in Watertown, New<br />

York. Months of mammograms,<br />

MRI’s and a biopsy had led to this<br />

moment. I told myself I was prepared<br />

for whatever the outcome. And then<br />

my doctor and her nurse walked into<br />

the room.<br />

My doctor wasted no time getting<br />

to the point of the appointment. I<br />

had cancer.<br />

I was wrong, I was not ready and felt<br />

myself slowly disappear inside my<br />

brain. As she discussed the type of<br />

cancer I had, the stage, the treatments,<br />

all I could think about was if someone<br />

were there with me, to hold my<br />

hand, to wrap me in their arms. As<br />

the tears streamed down my cheeks,<br />

my doctor asked her nurse to fetch<br />

me some tissues. She returned with<br />

a small box, hard, and cold in my<br />

hands, with crisp, starchy tissues.<br />

As I continued to try to make sense<br />

of what my doctor was telling me,<br />

I kept thinking of the box in my<br />

hands and how it was like the whole<br />

experience: cold, hard, crisp. That box<br />

of tissues provided me no comfort.<br />

For twelve months, individuals<br />

across the country have sat alone in<br />

examination rooms, like me, hearing<br />

the devastating news that they have<br />

cancer, while no loved one is there<br />

to hold their hand or wrap them in<br />

their arms.<br />

These cancer patients have been<br />

abandoned in the front of hospitals,<br />

as ordered by COVID restrictions<br />

to walk in alone where they will face<br />

life altering surgeries without their<br />

loving family and friends. Then no<br />

loved one is there to see them<br />

when they get out of surgery<br />

or sit with them as they recover<br />

in their hospital room.<br />

These cancer patients have been<br />

dropped off at their radiation<br />

and chemo appointments<br />

with a wave and well wishes<br />

like students in front of an<br />

elementary school; however,<br />

instead of a crowded school, it<br />

is more like a prison and their<br />

time there is spent in solitary.<br />

“And all those things I didn’t say<br />

Wrecking balls inside my brain<br />

I will scream them loud tonight<br />

Can you hear my voice this<br />

time?”<br />

Navigating this cancer journey<br />

through the COVID shackles<br />

since November has been difficult;<br />

however, when I think about the<br />

hundreds of thousands of cancer<br />

patients throughout the nation that<br />

have had to endure appointments,<br />

procedures, surgeries, and treatments<br />

alone and in isolation due to the<br />

Pandemic, it breaks my heart!<br />

Emotional and physical support are<br />

important components of recovering<br />

from cancer! I want the world to<br />

know that cancer patients NEED<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 81


} }<br />

“Emotional and physical support are important components of recovering from cancer! I<br />

want the world to know that cancer patients NEED emotional support!”<br />

emotional support! I want to shout<br />

it from rooftops, rattle the chains,<br />

stomp on the floorboards, and make<br />

some noise! It has become my FIGHT<br />

SONG!<br />

Emotional support is not just wanted<br />

during a cancer patient’s revelations,<br />

biopsies, surgeries, procedures,<br />

and treatments, it is a necessity! A<br />

fundamental component of a person’s<br />

well-being is their emotional, social<br />

support, and mental health. If a<br />

person’s emotional well-being is<br />

supported, that resilience and positive<br />

emotions help in the healing process.<br />

According to Cure.com, the initial<br />

reaction to a cancer diagnosis is often<br />

shock and disbelief, followed by a<br />

period of distress characterized by<br />

mixed symptoms of anxiety, anger<br />

and depression. Huh?! And for the<br />

past 12 months, cancer patients like<br />

me, have had no one to share that<br />

initial reaction with due to COVID<br />

restraints. Let alone the following<br />

months of appointments, surgeries,<br />

and treatments!<br />

I found it validating that the American<br />

Cancer Society agrees with me! In<br />

their article, “Nurture Your Emotional<br />

Health: Coping with Anxiety During<br />

the Coronavirus Outbreak, published<br />

at the cusp of the Pandemic, they<br />

stated that cancer patients “need to<br />

take care of their emotional and mental<br />

well-being.” They suggest “keeping a<br />

good outlook, getting plenty of sleep,<br />

and trying new recipes.”<br />

But…wait!<br />

Myself, as well as the other cancer<br />

warriors that I have been fighting<br />

alongside, are not and were not<br />

comforted by a good night sleep<br />

when we learned of our diagnosis or<br />

by trying a new recipe before being<br />

dropped off for treatments. The<br />

emotional support that we crave, and<br />

need is physical. It is the gentle touch<br />

on the shoulder letting us know that<br />

we are supported and loved, or the<br />

hand holding ours when we just do<br />

not want to feel so alone.<br />

“This is my fight song<br />

Take back my life song<br />

Prove I’m alright song<br />

My powers turned on<br />

Starting right now I’ll be strong<br />

I’ll play my fight song<br />

And I don’t really care if nobody else<br />

believes<br />

Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left<br />

in me!”<br />

Like the lyrics to Rachel Platten’s<br />

“Fight Song” “I might only have one<br />

match, but I can make an explosion.”<br />

I have made it my mission to share<br />

my story and the story of all cancer<br />

patients during COVID. If enough<br />

people can hear our voice then we<br />

can make a difference, we can make<br />

a change, we can get the emotional<br />

support that is so necessary in the<br />

healing of our fellow warriors.<br />

“Can you hear my voice this time?”<br />

I am petitioning the CDC to<br />

CHANGE the COVID-19 Healthcare<br />

Plan and make an amendment for<br />

Cancer Patients that allows for either<br />

a person to accompany them to<br />

appointments and hospitalizations or<br />

the creation of a healthcare companion<br />

that would do the same, to maintain<br />

and support the emotional well-being<br />

of the patient which would ultimately<br />

improve their recovery.<br />

Sign the petition: http://chng.it/<br />

X9BTVsddxV<br />

82 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 83


$199<br />



INSERT<br />

WOMEN<br />

OWNED<br />


MEET<br />

Lam Hoang My ( Amy Hoang)<br />










Amy Hoang is the founder of Golden<br />

World Magazine and she holds multiple<br />

positions under the Golden World Group<br />

LLC, which includes the Golden Sea<br />

Corporation, Golden World Beauty<br />

Pageant, Golden Agarwood Jewelry,<br />

& Golden Health and Beauty Supply.<br />

She has been featured on the covers of<br />

Malvie Magazine and Gmaro Magazine.<br />

Also, she has been published in Vigour<br />

Magazine, Edith Magazine, Illumee<br />

Magazine, and many<br />

other publications<br />

in Vietnam. Amy<br />

Hoang is an<br />

ambitious, successful<br />

businesswoman who is<br />

a passionate innovator<br />

in the fashion, beauty<br />

and entertainment<br />

industries. She uses<br />

her artistic talent<br />

as a fashionista to<br />

promote luxurious<br />

couture, while<br />

leading a resplendent<br />

lifestyle exemplified by<br />

adventure, elegance,<br />

and altruism.<br />

Amy Hoang is a<br />

poised, graceful entrepreneur who<br />

is intelligent, empathetic, and openminded.<br />

She is an eloquent speaker who<br />

leverages her superb communication<br />

skills to build strong networks in the<br />

entertainment industry and to promote<br />

her philanthropic pursuits, especially<br />

during the COVID-19 pandemic.<br />

Under Amy Hoang’s leadership, Golden<br />

Health Supply provided high-quality<br />

medical equipment to customers in the<br />

U.S. and internationally. Specifically, her<br />

company provided many antibacterial<br />

mask products to help protect people<br />

from COVID-19 spread. Furthermore,<br />

the Golden World group kicked off <strong>2021</strong><br />

by donating masks to people in the city<br />

of Stanton, Southern California. Her<br />

organization handed out over 25,000<br />

boxes of medical masks and hand sanitizer<br />

to people in need.<br />

Amy Hoang is a generous and<br />

compassionate humanitarian who donates<br />

to a variety of charitable causes. Several<br />

of these causes include: The Golden<br />

World Group Charity Foundation,<br />

Shriners Hospitals for Children, “Pray For<br />

Vietnam” initiative to help flood victims,<br />

American Cancer Society, environmental<br />

preservation of the oceans, and retired<br />

military veterans in Massachusetts.<br />

In addition, her organization focuses<br />

on helping vulnerable, impoverished<br />

women and children throughout the<br />

world. She constantly gives back to her<br />

Vietnamese community and artists. The<br />

Golden World Group will help bring<br />

the blockbuster, Vietnamese movie<br />

“Sam Hoi” to the U.S. to reach a larger<br />

audience. Moreover, Amy Hoang believes<br />

that it is important to celebrate diversity<br />

using her Golden World platforms to<br />

promote inclusion and cultural awareness.<br />

She is committed to embracing diversity<br />

in the entertainment world. As the<br />

CEO of the Golden<br />

World Beauty<br />

Pageants, she brings<br />

together creatives and<br />

contestants from<br />

various cultures and<br />

nationalities, such<br />

as the Ms. Golden<br />

World events from<br />

2017 to present and<br />

Ms. Golden Sea<br />

Pageant in 2019.<br />

As the first runnerup<br />

of Ms. Vietnam<br />

International<br />

Pageant 2015, she<br />

wanted to create an<br />

inclusive pageant that<br />

welcomes all men<br />

and women. Her<br />

pageant emphasizes the importance of<br />

individuals who have heart and passion<br />

for their communities. Amy Hoang’s<br />

radiant, cheerful personality inspires<br />

others to see their own beauty and to<br />

make a meaningful difference in the<br />

world. She believes that acknowledging<br />

and honoring cultural diversity will lead<br />

to the creation of global citizens who are<br />

dedicated to making positive changes in<br />

their communities and abroad.<br />

90 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 91

92 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />


“Amy Hoang is an<br />

ambitious, successful<br />

businesswoman who is<br />

a passionate innovator<br />

in the fashion, beauty<br />

and entertainment<br />


94 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“Amy Hoang’s vision of inclusivity inspired the creation of the Golden World Magazine.”<br />

Amy Hoang’s vision of inclusivity<br />

inspired the creation of the Golden<br />

World Magazine. The magazine provides<br />

a unique opportunity for designers,<br />

photographers, models and artists<br />

from various cultural backgrounds to<br />

showcase their work to a larger audience.<br />

Additionally, this magazine will celebrate<br />

the creative teams and models who<br />

participated in the Golden World Beauty<br />

Pageants. It will commemorate the<br />

tremendous effort, time and diligence<br />

required to organize and to coordinate<br />

unforgettable beauty pageant events. Amy<br />

Hoang aims to inspire and to encourage<br />

other young talent organizations to<br />

submit their work for future publications<br />

in order to cultivate an international<br />

creative community.<br />

As a brilliant female CEO, Amy Hoang<br />

has successfully navigated the challenges<br />

of 2020 while changing business strategies<br />

to suit the times. She is optimistic that<br />

the future will be prosperous for the<br />

Golden World LLC with several major<br />

projects and collaborations currently<br />

under way. One of her company’s most<br />

important mottos is “Understanding<br />

- Loving - Caring – Sharing,” which<br />

continues to influence her progress<br />

into <strong>2021</strong>. Amy Hoang is not only an<br />

immensely gifted businesswoman and<br />

trendsetter in fashion, but a selfless<br />

leader devoted to diversity, inclusion,<br />

and philanthropy.<br />

Tell our audience about yourself and<br />

where you are from.<br />

My name is My Lam Diem Hoang<br />

kwown as Lam Hoàng My. I was born<br />

in Vietname and and graduated from<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 95


} }<br />

“ I love learning and sharing. I love to learn what I dont know and share what I do<br />

know .”<br />

the University of Tourism in VN.I moved<br />

too the US at the age of 20. I am the<br />

present CEO of Golden World Beauty<br />

/ CEO OF Golden Sea International<br />

/ chair women /Founder of Golden<br />

World Group Inc Charity foundation<br />

Co founder / owner of Golden<br />

Health Supply, the CEO at BOMOI<br />

Entertainment and the Owner of Beauty<br />

Times Salon and Spa.<br />

What got you into the pageant world?<br />

I love learning and<br />

sharing. I love to learn<br />

what I dont know and<br />

share what I do know .<br />

Promotion of a platform<br />

is a big one for me too.<br />

Being passionate about<br />

a cause and entering a<br />

pageant is a great way<br />

to share your platform<br />

and your enthusiasm<br />

for something that you<br />

strongly believe in.<br />

How did you become<br />

CEO of Golden World<br />

Group/ Founder of<br />

Miss Golden World<br />

/ Miss & Mr Golden<br />

Sea International?<br />

I love beauty and feeling beautiful.<br />

Making other confident in thier own<br />

skin. Beauty is from the inside out.<br />

Working on charity work , giving back<br />

to the society all helped me to become<br />

CEO. I am a good leader . I lead the<br />

company in the right direction . I help<br />

people reach their goals, and I am not<br />

afraid to hire people that are better<br />

than me, ass long as they are good for<br />

the company. I look out for others not<br />

just my own benefits.<br />

I love that the Golden World Group<br />

is about helping children in need,<br />

empowering women, understanding,<br />

caring and helping others. What made<br />

you start the organization with this<br />

mission?<br />

Children are our first priority. They<br />

are the future of the world. Being a<br />

minority woman, Ideaply understand<br />

the difficulties that women in Asia and<br />

in general arefacing. Racism, funding<br />

security, lack of capital, family, children<br />

and the list goes on.I can see myself in<br />

that world. So I am doing my best for<br />

myself and for others . Giving back is<br />

a beautiful action. The world needs it.<br />

Understanding, caring, loving and<br />

sharing is who I am. I just want to be<br />

able to help as many people as I can.<br />

It seems that you are really a true<br />

woman entrepreneur. Can you tell us<br />

about your other businesses?<br />

I loved doing business when I was a little<br />

girl. I helped my mom to manage her<br />

store after school. Growing up with that<br />

business mind, I can see opportunities<br />

everywhere. I Graduated from Bay Bath<br />

University for International Business and<br />

this was really the start of my crazy life.<br />

Long story short, our company has<br />

grown very large in different fields:<br />

like real estate, import/ export, sea food<br />

meat, the Entertainment<br />

industry :and more. We<br />

host two Pageants every<br />

year as well. I am also<br />

a special event planner.<br />

Plus, we help people<br />

in the fashion industry<br />

eith raising capital for<br />

investment. We Supply<br />

PPE products in big<br />

quantities.<br />

What gave you the<br />

courage to start your<br />

own businesses?<br />

I really dont know what<br />

one thing made me start<br />

my business ( insert laugh<br />

here). I born for this.<br />

My passion is working<br />

and making others happy.<br />

What is your current reigning status?<br />

How long have you been competing?<br />

I competed once 6 years a go and didn’t<br />

win, but I was a first runner up. I am<br />

short and petite, so maybe that was the<br />

reason why I couldn’t touch that crown.<br />

So, I said to myself, if I cant not win<br />

that crown for myself I will make myself<br />

the director of a pageant and lay it on<br />

96 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>



“ My favorite part of my job is seeing our contestants shine, gain confidence, lead them to<br />

other opportunities, and open their doors to the world.”<br />

others with special criteria for petite,<br />

but smart women like me to shine even<br />

if it was only once in their life.<br />

What is your favorite part<br />

about being in the pageants?<br />

What about coordinating<br />

the pageants?<br />

My favorite part of my job is<br />

seeing our contestants shine,<br />

gain confidence, lead them<br />

to other opportunities, and<br />

open their doors to the world.<br />

Coordinating a pageant is<br />

not easy, especially if it is an<br />

international one like Golden<br />

World Beauty Pageant. We<br />

welcome all races, ages,<br />

nationalities, different<br />

backgrounds , different level<br />

sof education, different shapes<br />

and sizes. We all unite on<br />

one platform to compte, to<br />

learn, to share, and to love<br />

each other.<br />

Who has been your biggest<br />

influence?<br />

Oprah Winfrey is my biggest<br />

influence. I read about her,<br />

listen to her, and my goal is to<br />

sit with her on her TV show<br />

one day. I want to talk and<br />

share everything with her.<br />

Who has been the biggest<br />

success story to come from<br />

the Golden World Pageants?<br />

On the younger side we have<br />

Jacqueline Paras, Miss Golden World<br />

2018 . She is from the Philippinesand<br />

she is now a great face in the NY fashion<br />

industry. She is a great model, singer<br />

and dancer. She goes a long with the<br />

Golden World Group in all of our<br />

charity works.<br />

For the more mature ladies, we have<br />

two that have had great success in their<br />

career.The first is Mrs Annie K Nguyễn<br />

who was crowned Mrs Golden Sea<br />

International in NY in 2018. She just<br />

successfuly singed a multi-millions<br />

dollar PPE contract for Golden Sea<br />

Corporation. Then, we have Mrs Golden<br />

World Entrepreneur 2019<br />

Ninh Nguyen who is very<br />

well known in Los Angeles,<br />

California for her chain<br />

PHO FILET. She is making<br />

million now in income and<br />

is very successful. Both of<br />

them are representatives for<br />

the Golden World Group<br />

501C3 charity foundation.<br />

What do you look for<br />

in contestants for the<br />

pageant? What about<br />

for the winners?<br />

We are more strict on<br />

contestants for Miss<br />

pageants then the others.<br />

They have to meet the<br />

requirements: beauty,<br />

education, community<br />

work , personally, height,<br />

weight, and even family<br />

background is checked.<br />

For Ms and Mrs contestants<br />

we look for the background,<br />

personally, education,<br />

and their passion. Most<br />

important is their goal<br />

in what do they want to<br />

achieve.<br />

For the winner of Miss<br />

they need to meet all the<br />

requirements to be the best. Ms/Mrs: is<br />

more about their great achievements in<br />

life, and something for others to learn<br />

and follow.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 99

100 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 101

102 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />


104 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“ Yes, we got hit really hard with the pandamic. We had to make several changes in order<br />

to rescue our business.”<br />

Have you had to make any changes<br />

during the pandemic to how you<br />

run the pageants?<br />

Yes, we got hit really hard with the<br />

pandamic. We had to make several<br />

changes in order to<br />

rescue our business.<br />

We are making PPE<br />

products, doing virtual<br />

shows, zoom shows, and<br />

even got creative with<br />

a livestream talk show.<br />

Where did you get your<br />

education, and what<br />

did you major in?<br />

I was graduated in VN<br />

for my first 4 years<br />

degree in Tourism. Then<br />

I moved to the US and<br />

continued my education<br />

at Springfield Technical<br />

Community College<br />

and graduated from<br />

Bay Bath University<br />

in Longeadow, MA six<br />

years later.<br />

Who has been the most<br />

influential in helping<br />

your career?<br />

That would definitely<br />

be my mom. She is my<br />

best friend ever.<br />

What do you have<br />

planned for <strong>2021</strong>?<br />

The coming back of<br />

the Miss Gokden Sea<br />

International <strong>2021</strong>,<br />

Miss Golden World Beauty Pageant<br />

<strong>2021</strong>and the Golden Legendary<br />

special Award.<br />

What is the one thing you cannot<br />

live without when competing?<br />

You can’t do anything without<br />

confidence.<br />

Who has been your favorite designer<br />

to work with and why?<br />

KhangLe and Jacky Tai because<br />

they are so creative, have a unique<br />

fashion style and are so amazing to<br />

work with.<br />

What do you think is the one quality<br />

that makes you a lady boss?<br />

+ being a people person<br />

+ hard working<br />

+ willing to learn<br />

+ confident<br />

+ understanding<br />

If you could use one word<br />

to describe yourself what<br />

would it be?<br />

Sweet but tough.<br />

If you had one piece of<br />

advice to someone just<br />

starting out, what would<br />

it be?<br />

My best advise to everyone<br />

would be to be yourself, be<br />

passionate, start while you<br />

are still employed, don’t<br />

do it alone, get your clients<br />

and customers lined up,<br />

and most importantly have<br />

a business plan in place.<br />

Make sure to do your<br />

research before jumping<br />

in and get professional<br />

help. Have a dream, dream<br />

big and work hard and be<br />

patient because success<br />

never comes that easy.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 105


“Have a dream, dream big and work hard and be patient because success never comes<br />

that easy.”<br />

106 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 107

110 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>





Please give a warm welcome to the<br />

latest She Hustles Talks cover woman,<br />

the “Diva” herself, Rumella Cameron.<br />

So you are a professional wrestler, a real<br />

estate agent, and a business owner of<br />

Conversance Business Solutions LLC.<br />

Plus, you are a mother. Tell our readers<br />

a little bit about Rumella “LaDiva”<br />

Cameron and your background.<br />

My name is Rumella<br />

Cameron. I am a mother of<br />

3, the CEO of Conversance<br />

Business Solutions, a real<br />

estate agent, and I am a<br />

community activist, where<br />

I served as the town leader<br />

in a political committee.<br />

Which of your 3<br />

professions came first?<br />

I actually started wresting<br />

in 2007. Two years out<br />

of high school, I began<br />

to pursue my wrestling<br />

career. I then started my<br />

business in 2015, and I<br />

became a licensed real estate<br />

agent last January 2020.<br />

Tell us about being a<br />

professional wrestler. How did you<br />

start? What made you want to do<br />

something like that?<br />

What got me interested in wrestling, my<br />

family and I would sit around the tv on<br />

Monday nights and watch it together.<br />

WWE, formally known as WWF during<br />

the Attitude Era was the best. I would<br />

see superstars such as the Rock, Lita<br />

& and the Hardy Boys, and Chyna.<br />

I thought it was cool. One day I was<br />

watching tv and saw a buddy of mines<br />

on a local channel wrestling. I called<br />

the network to get in touch with the<br />

promoter, and that’s how I got started. I<br />

signed up for training a few weeks later.<br />

Where did the wrestling name and<br />

persona “La Diva” come from?<br />

My wrestling persona is like my alter ego<br />

lol. She’s fierce and takes no mess from<br />

anyone. I have high standards, so LaDiva,<br />

which means The Diva transpired. In<br />

the ring, I am the heal, which in better<br />

terms, the villain. I love playing the bad<br />

girls. Brains, beauty, and brutality is my<br />

tagline. Being the only female wrestler in<br />

Upstate NY and becoming the women’s<br />

champion in just a few promotions on<br />

the east coast and in Canada, I was that<br />

chic. The majority of my opponents<br />

were men. So I had no issue going toe<br />

to toe with the guys. Hey, why not?<br />

What made you decide to start your<br />

own business and become a female<br />

entrepreneur in Real Estate and<br />

Conversance Business Solutions?<br />

I follow and a lot of<br />

successful entrepreneurs<br />

and business owners.<br />

Success millionaires say the<br />

key to success is to have<br />

seven streams of income.<br />

I whole-heartily believe in<br />

that. You can’t always rely<br />

on a basket, and you should<br />

never put all your eggs in<br />

one basket. But I do this<br />

strategically, of course.<br />

There’s only so much time<br />

in a day. But I was ready<br />

to go on my own and be<br />

on my boss. I founded<br />

Conversance in 2015,<br />

serving small to mid-sized<br />

businesses nationally,<br />

providing administrative<br />

support and business<br />

strategies. What got me<br />

into real estate, one of our clients was<br />

building their team, and we helped<br />

streamlined their processes and systems,<br />

and it just grew from there. Why not<br />

get into real estate. Real estate is the<br />

best way to make investments and build<br />

up your financial portfolio.<br />

What made you decide to start<br />

Conversance, and what is its mission?

112 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 113

114 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“ I love playing the bad girls. Brains, beauty, and brutality is my tagline. ”<br />

Our mission is to be the top virtual<br />

assistant firm in the US, providing<br />

administrative support and business<br />

services to small and medium businesses<br />

that are either starting up or expanding.<br />

Not too many entrepreneurs have the<br />

resources to hire a team, and we provide<br />

one at a fraction of the cost. We help<br />

with business planning, executing the<br />

plan, and building up your team to<br />

help you be successful in your business.<br />

As a business owner, what would you say<br />

are your top priorities for both yourself<br />

in the business and also for your clients?<br />

My top priorities are business<br />

development, sales, and client retention.<br />

I spend the majority of my time<br />

finding ways to be a resource to our<br />

clients and how we can help them<br />

grow their business. Their success is<br />

ours. Lead generation is a daily task.<br />

How do you market your<br />

business, and which tactics have<br />

you found to be most successful,<br />

especially during a pandemic?<br />

I market my business by networking<br />

with other businesses, introducing<br />

myself, setting up meetings, reaching out<br />

via social media, and cold calling. The<br />

most effective way we gain new clients is<br />

through reaching out on LinkedIn and<br />

following up with cold-calls and emails.<br />

Sometimes I would try snail mail, but<br />

that didn’t bring much success. The direct<br />

interactions have been very successful.<br />

What was your key driving force<br />

to become a real estate agent?<br />

The funny thing is, I love Millionaire<br />

Dollar Listing NY and I have been<br />

following Ryan Serhant for many years.<br />

Although the real estate market is not<br />

the same as it is in NYC or LA, I’ve<br />

learned so much that I have applied to<br />

my own real estate business. Another<br />

reason why I got into real estate is<br />

much bigger than me. Some people<br />

believe that they are not able to achieve<br />

buying a home, and I am changing<br />

that narrative. Everyone should be able<br />

to qualify for a home, understand the<br />

home buying process, and know there<br />

are grants and resources available to<br />

them. So I work with buyers and educate<br />

them on this. It makes me happy to<br />

get a buyer into their new or even first<br />

home. We are on the journey together.<br />

If you had the chance to start your<br />

career over again, would you do<br />

anything differently and why?<br />

No, every failure leads to success.<br />

In failing, you learn a lesson. My<br />

path is mine to take and made<br />

me into the person I am today.<br />

What would you say are the top<br />

three skills needed to be successful as<br />

both a professional female wrestler<br />

and a female business owner?<br />

Top 3 skills would be perseverance,<br />

determination, and patience.<br />

Who has been your greatest inspiration?<br />

My greatest inspiration has been the<br />

many women before me that went<br />

through struggles to carve a path for<br />

themselves and generations later. Mostly,<br />

my mother and grandmother. Strong<br />

black women who did everything on<br />

their own to provide and take care of<br />

their families. I wanted to prove to<br />

them that their hard work and the<br />

life they have provided weren’t in vain.<br />

How do you define success?<br />

Success means many things to many<br />

people. What success means to me<br />

and that I am surrounded by people<br />

who love and support me. Success<br />

to me is knowing that somehow I<br />

have inspired someone and/or made<br />

some type of impact on them.<br />

Do you spend more time lighting<br />

fires or putting them out?<br />

That’s a great question. I believe I<br />

am the fire. But I am really good<br />

at putting them out. What defines<br />

a person is how they can pressure.<br />

Tell our audience what<br />

makes you a hustler...<br />

Hustler is my middle name. What<br />

makes me a hustler is that no matter<br />

what life throws my way I always find a<br />

way to maneuver and get to my goals.<br />

Where do you see your businesses a<br />

year from now? What about 5 and<br />

10 years? Will you still be wrestling?<br />

In a year, I see my business with a<br />

huge team, helping businesses all<br />

over the world and providing jobs<br />

locally. I do plan on wrestling until<br />

my body tells me it’s time to stop.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 115

116 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“We are changing the trajectory. Black women represent 42% of new women-owned<br />

businesses.”<br />

Do you walk your talk?<br />

Always!<br />

Do you think being a minority has<br />

helped or hindered you in business?<br />

I don’t make it an issue, but I know for<br />

sure there are systems in place to keep<br />

us down. I don’t always get the same<br />

opportunities as my other counterparts,<br />

so I make the opportunity. It<br />

honestly shouldn’t matter. I see more<br />

opportunities coming because I am<br />

a minority women-owned business.<br />

We are changing the trajectory.<br />

Black women represent 42% of<br />

new women-owned businesses.<br />

What is one thing you<br />

have done that not many<br />

people know about you?<br />

After attending Brockport, I was<br />

actually a Criminal Justice Major and<br />

Business Administration and Military<br />

Science. I was planning on going into<br />

the Army as an officer. I decided that<br />

wasn’t the best choice for my family. So<br />

I decided I can still serve and did the<br />

RPD test and passed. But of course,<br />

life doesn’t always go as planned.<br />

What is one piece of advice<br />

you have been giving that has<br />

helped shape who you are?<br />

When I was attending Genesee<br />

Community College, I had a professor<br />

that I went to get advice from, and<br />

she told me, “Your life begins the<br />

moment you step outside your comfort<br />

zone.” She was right. Each year I find<br />

a way to push myself to the next level.<br />

Of your 3 VERY different career choices,<br />

which has been your favorite and why?<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 117

118 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 119


“I really feel as though the pandemic has helped my business. With companies going<br />

virtual, we were able to shine during this time by providing virtual assistant services. ”<br />

Professional wrestling. When I am<br />

in that ring, I feel alive. I feel free. I<br />

feel at home. It’s my passion. But I<br />

know putting my body on the line like<br />

that is not good for my family. I have<br />

my babies I have to come home to.<br />

Has the pandemic<br />

helped or hindered<br />

your business?<br />

I really feel as though the<br />

pandemic has helped my<br />

business. With companies<br />

going virtual, we were<br />

able to shine during this<br />

time by providing virtual<br />

assistant services. We’ve<br />

been trying to show<br />

businesses for years<br />

the benefits of doing a<br />

majority of the workflow<br />

virtually and how it saves<br />

them time and money.<br />

The crazy thing is I started<br />

my real estate business<br />

right before the pandemic,<br />

it was slow at first, but I<br />

was able to get my first<br />

three sales before the<br />

end of the year. I wish<br />

I was able to do more,<br />

but hey, that’s what life<br />

threw my way. Have<br />

to make the most of it.<br />

Do you have any<br />

big business plans for <strong>2021</strong>?<br />

Well, yes I do. We are going into<br />

year six, and we plan on doing a<br />

huge marketing push to increase<br />

awareness and reach more businesses.<br />

What would you say your clients<br />

think is your best quality?<br />

My interpersonal communication<br />

skills. I am to connect with my clients,<br />

and they like that. I understand their<br />

wants and needs and what they are<br />

looking to accomplish, whether<br />

they are a home buyer or a business<br />

owner looking to grow and expand.<br />

What does your family<br />

think about what you do,<br />

especially being a pro wrestler?<br />

My kids think I am a<br />

rock star. I don’t see it,<br />

but everyone always tells<br />

me how I inspire them.<br />

That makes me happy. I am<br />

just doing what I can and<br />

living to my full potential.<br />

What would be one bit of<br />

advice you would give to<br />

young women wanting to<br />

start their own business?<br />

START!!! Don’t let anyone<br />

tell you that you can’t, or<br />

talk you out of a decision.<br />

Keep your eyes on the prize,<br />

do what makes you happy<br />

and live your life.<br />

Make-up: Lamany<br />

Chanthavong<br />

Hair: Quanda Weaver<br />

Stylist: Latrice Brown<br />

Vyntage Junkie<br />

Skin care & Creative<br />

Director: Vaughan Pinckney<br />

120 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 121



My name is Angela Tewa, a 26-year-old<br />

New York City native currently living<br />

in Western New York. I have grown<br />

to be a woman of many hats. I am a<br />

proud boy mom of a precious oneyear-old<br />

son, associate’s and bachelors<br />

degree holder in Criminal Justice,<br />

and I graduate with my master’s<br />

degree in Social Work from the<br />

University at Buffalo this May<br />

of <strong>2021</strong>. I also intern with the<br />

NYS Department of Parole.<br />

Throughout my entire graduate<br />

program, I have been working<br />

as a caseworker and skill builder<br />

in child welfare for at risk youth<br />

and families in the system. I have<br />

recently resigned to dedicate my<br />

undivided attention and focus<br />

in school while preparing for<br />

post graduation.<br />

I am incredibly ardent in<br />

my line of work in the field.<br />

That is one thing that I’m<br />

sure will never change is my<br />

human rights perspectives,<br />

my compassion for people,<br />

and my genuine heart to help.<br />

In 2016, I took up a modeling<br />

offer and had not stopped since.<br />

Many people have asked me,<br />

“Why didn’t you make it into<br />

a business earlier?” I’ve always<br />

loved being in front of the camera,<br />

but telling stories and creating art<br />

through my pictures is such a fulfilling<br />

and inspirational deed to me. I’ve<br />

always had full-time work, money<br />

was never a motive, and no matter<br />

how many paid gigs I get, it never<br />

will be. It is my passion, and it is my<br />

self-care. Of course, after leaving a<br />

full-time job, yeah, it was time to<br />

cut down on so many collaborative<br />

projects. After all, I think I got quite<br />

a few years of building my craft and<br />

gaining experience in so many different<br />

aspects of the industry to be able to<br />

take the following steps. Still, up to<br />

this day, I love being active in the<br />

community, helping others create,<br />

helping others get experience and<br />

genuinely networking and making<br />

friends with like-minded individuals.<br />

What started off as a hobby then<br />

became a serious passion and money<br />

maker. I have been blessed with<br />

many opportunities such as runway,<br />

modeling for local brands, freelance<br />

photography, music videos, and extra<br />

roles in popular series such<br />

as Orange Is The New Black<br />

and SVU: Law and Order.<br />

I have gotten questions<br />

about the possible conflict<br />

of modeling and my career<br />

in criminal justice/social<br />

work. Now, as I am about to<br />

graduate with my master’s,<br />

my goal is to use my platform<br />

to advocate for human rights<br />

and combine the two!<br />

The climate that we are in<br />

in this country is intense<br />

on all levels, especially<br />

with the black lives matter<br />

movement, racism, police<br />

brutality, LGBTQ+ justice,<br />

gender inequality and the<br />

list goes on. I think it would<br />

be pretty negligent of me as<br />

a young black woman and<br />

black mother of a black son,<br />

to just continue to take pretty<br />

pictures, and that’s it. I’m<br />

not just a pretty face.<br />

There’s purpose behind my choices<br />

as a creative. There are so many<br />

ways that I have utilized my “social<br />

media presence” and will continue<br />

to, to speak out against issues and<br />

speak for those who never got the<br />

chance to or who simply can’t.<br />

Signing petitions, sharing stories,<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 123

124 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 125


“I’ve always had full-time work, money was never a motive, and no matter how many<br />

paid gigs I get, it never will be.”<br />

voting, getting involved in black lives<br />

matter campaigns, supporting black<br />

businesses, having those difficult<br />

conversations with others, simply<br />

telling someone, it is not enough to not<br />

just be racist, you have to be constantly<br />

anti-racist, so on and so forth.<br />

Be sure to check out and like, if you’re<br />

feeling generous, my modeling business<br />

page on Facebook, AngelaTewa, if<br />

you’d like to book me as a model<br />

for any commercial brands, creative<br />

portraits, videos, etc other modeling<br />

projects. You can also check me out<br />

on Instagram at @princesa_angiee<br />

to see all of my cool creations and<br />

also subscribe to my new YouTube<br />

channel that documents my modeling<br />

life, called “Off The Record”.


}}<br />



Tell us about yourself and what made<br />

you start Mind. Body. Meta...<br />

I began a different organic skincare<br />

business about 10 years ago in Auburn<br />

and I really fell in love with the holistic<br />

side of skincare then. I had taken<br />

schooling in Herbalism and Organic<br />

Chemistry in my training leading up<br />

to getting my Esthetics license. I started<br />

making my own skincare in 2013,<br />

taking all that I knew and fell in love.<br />

It was at that point that I realized that<br />

I didn’t want to work for anyone else<br />

in this arena. And it was all going very<br />

well. There was a point in my life where<br />

things were rock bottom. I could not<br />

figure how to right myself and I was<br />

emotionally damaged. I sought out<br />

a talk therapy approach and leaned<br />

very heavily into Cognitive Behavioral<br />

Therapy. It really helped me develop<br />

better coping skills and recognize<br />

the areas I still needed work. That<br />

pulled me in the direction of seeking<br />

my own certification in Cognitive<br />

Behavioral Therapy which I did in<br />

2018. Creating MindBodyMeta was<br />

a no-brainer to begin. If you’re truly<br />

setting out to help others take care<br />

of their own whole body and being,<br />

we’re really missing the point if we’re<br />

only coming part way. Skincare is my<br />

passion, emotional intelligence and<br />

stability is my passion and herbalism<br />

and aromatherapy are two things that<br />

helped me sustain myself through some<br />

of the most difficult times in my life.<br />

I’d be silly not to offer that amount of<br />

well-being to my clients.<br />

I know The Pali word Mettā means<br />

benevolence or goodwill and loving<br />

kindness. How did you decide on this<br />

as part of your business name?<br />

That’s so interesting! I’ve never known<br />

that! Ha! Actually, it’s just a shortened<br />

version of the word, Metaphysical. I’ve<br />

been a solitary practitioner of Herbalism,<br />

Tarot and Brujeria since I was about<br />

13. It’s been part of my life for over 30<br />

years and the marriage of Tarot and Talk<br />

Therapy was one the most wonderful<br />

assets to my growth. I wanted to be an<br />

educational resource in Metaphysics,<br />

addressing the many variations and<br />

ways people can be more spiritual. And<br />

spirituality is so individual, it’s important<br />

to understand what will work best for<br />

you in that journey.<br />

What made you decide to start your<br />

own business?<br />

Honestly, I didn’t like working for other<br />

people that weren’t truly invested in<br />

me. I really detest micromanaging. I do<br />

enough of that to myself, I don’t need it<br />

piled on. But the main reason is because<br />

I don’t think I’ll ever find a business or<br />

corporation as unique as mine where I<br />

would be happy. Marrying facial and<br />

bodycare with an herbal apothecary as<br />

well as a mental health talk therapy<br />

office seems like too much of an<br />

amalgamation, doesn’t it? But it works<br />

so well and seamless here.<br />

What is your favorite part of doing<br />

what you do?<br />

Wow, hmm, really all of it. I make 80<br />

out the 87 products that are sold on<br />

my shelves. That’s really the beauty<br />

of it. I get to put my energy, my hope<br />

and my expertise into everything that<br />

touches a client. I love Skincare and<br />

Histology and the Therapy. It’s so<br />

hard to choose.<br />

What types of services do you offer<br />

and what makes you different from<br />

other service providers?<br />

Firstly, we offer skincare services like<br />

waxing, facials and body treatments.<br />

All products used are made by me,<br />

so I can stand firmly behind them<br />

with the knowledge that they do<br />

what they say they’re going to as well<br />

as knowing each and every ingredient.<br />

I’ve also taken extensive continuing<br />

education in Oncology Esthetics and<br />

a heavy concentration on Melanated<br />

Skin, which is hard to come by in this<br />

area unfortunately. There are so many<br />

talented Estheticians of color. Seek them<br />

out. We offer Lash Services, especially<br />

for Sensitive Eyes, Cognitive Behavioral<br />

128 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


130 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“If you’re truly setting out to help others take care of their own whole body and being,<br />

we’re really missing the point if we’re only coming part way.”<br />

Therapy and a Women’s Educational and<br />

Healing Roundtable called Women&<br />

which focuses on healing through many<br />

of the issues Women face like Trauma,<br />

Stress, Sexuality and Societal Expectations.<br />

I love doing Tea and Tarot on Thursdays<br />

as well. I also run a Women in Horror<br />

night at the studio where women who<br />

love a good scary movie get to sit, watch,<br />

hang and eat some really great snacks.<br />

Another plate I spin is being a Horror<br />

Screenwriter so it’s let’s me flex that<br />

muscle and really enjoy it.<br />

What is mental health talk therapy?<br />

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy especially<br />

is a problem-solving therapy. Most folks<br />

that do well in CBT are that feel stuck<br />

in distress or bad behavioral patterns<br />

that they adapted to, those behaviors<br />

turn into negative, harsh, and extreme<br />

thinking patterns. When we really<br />

dissect those patterns, we discover that<br />

there are inaccuracies or distortions. In<br />

CBT, I teach clients to identify their<br />

negative thoughts and how to replace<br />

them with more accurate, adaptive,<br />

and helpful ones. It’s especially helpful<br />

for panic attacks, social anxiety, trauma<br />

and narcissistic recovery, and those<br />

stuck in painful feelings or unhealthy<br />

relationship patterns.<br />

What would you say is the mission<br />

behind Mind. Body. Meta?<br />

To help serve the entire human being.<br />

Mentally, emotionally, and physically<br />

and I suppose spiritually. If you’re a<br />

personal success but a spiritual mess<br />

we’re your best place to achieve that.<br />

If you’re struggling emotionally, we’re<br />

here to help walk you through better<br />

coping mechanisms, if you’re struggling<br />

physically, mostly through image and<br />

skincare, we’ve got you covered to be on<br />

your way to honoring yourself.<br />

Has being an entrepreneur and owning<br />

your own business affected your family/<br />

personal life?<br />

It’s been a tough balance for sure, but<br />

the rewards are well worth it. You think<br />

that owning your own business comes<br />

with a certain vein of independence: I<br />

can make my own hours and I go here<br />

and there. It’s a mix of being there for<br />

your clientele and working long hours<br />

to produce products, content, time for<br />

the people that seek you out and depend<br />

on your being there. My clients are such<br />

a driving force to be the best I can and<br />

my support at home is essential for my<br />

growth. I’m an incredibly independent<br />

person, to a fault actually, I have a need<br />

to do everything on my own. But it’s<br />

lovely to hear that I’m inspiring, I’m<br />

goal oriented and I’m nurturing from<br />

those that love me. A support system is<br />

important. Find those that champion you.<br />

What was your key driving force<br />

to become a female entrepreneur<br />

and opening a wellness center and<br />

combining mind and body?<br />

Really, my own experiences. I’m a<br />

bootstrap woman and fully grown latchkey<br />

kid. We learn to be self-reliant. But<br />

also, as a woman, it’s tough being given<br />

credit that you can build an empire on<br />

your own. Metaphysics and Therapy,<br />

Skincare and Herbalism, that’s all a part<br />

of me. It’s helped me grow and shape<br />

myself and when things weren’t going<br />

in the directions they needed to, all of<br />

that let me re-mold myself and go back<br />

to the drawing board. And I want my<br />

clients to know that when you step in<br />

here, feel free to be messy. To step in<br />

my studio unfinished, wondering, still<br />

figuring things out because that’s the<br />

beauty of women isn’t? We mold and<br />

shape and ignite and ember and bring<br />

the thunder and water new growth.<br />

We do all that AND build empires, all<br />

with two hands.<br />

Are there any services that are unique<br />

to your business?<br />

Our Herbal Pack Facial Massage utilizing<br />

plant extracts in a hot soak pack then<br />

massaged into the skin followed by a<br />

toxin drain.<br />

For Body, our Chakra Balancing Duo:<br />

it kicks up a LOT for people. We carry<br />

so much disharmony in the body when<br />

we’re stressed, it’s a real peek into what’s<br />

really going on inside.<br />

For Mind, our Women& Roundtable.<br />

It’s not your average support group.<br />

Women& is not your typical one and<br />

done meeting, nor is it a weekly venting<br />

session. Its learning how to successfully<br />

work THROUGH your issues. The<br />

work is pertinent. If you are in a place<br />

where enough is enough and you’ve had<br />

it with you own flip-flopping and you<br />

need that push to move forward to a<br />

more well-balanced life, than Women&<br />

is for you. It’s more of a workshop and<br />

it’s so necessary for women to know that<br />

there is a space to do that. Sometimes<br />

relying on your family and friends that<br />

are tired of hearing you vent isn’t helping<br />

you. You’ve got to move through it. I’m<br />

here to help you achieve that.<br />

For our Metaphysical, all of our herbal<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 131


“Spirituality is so individual, it’s important to understand what will work best for you in<br />

that journey. ”<br />

herbal tincures, blends, candles, spell<br />

and healing kits. Such an amazing array<br />

addressing lots of spiritual needs.<br />

Do you believe there is some sort of<br />

pattern or formula to becoming a<br />

successful entrepreneur?<br />

Oh not at all. We’re all tripping forwards<br />

and anyone who tells you they’ve got it all<br />

figured out I’m wary of. There’s always a<br />

pitfall, a misstep, something that legitimately<br />

will nwever work in your business.<br />

The only success that is tried and true<br />

for me in knowing my “why”. I’m a<br />

“why, why, why” person. Down to brass<br />

tacks. It’s been essential in my movement<br />

through the parameters my life’s path<br />

has put me through. It also is adjacent<br />

to my authenticity. Am I showing up<br />

in the right ways for myself? Why not?<br />

Is this bringing me peace? Why not?<br />

I’m feeling some kind of way about<br />

this por this person, why? Know your<br />

“why”. Simon Sinek, who is one of<br />

my favorite motivational speakers says,<br />

“People don’t buy what you do, they buy<br />

why you do it.” Not that I need people<br />

to be frequent buyers, but understand<br />

why I do what I do and hopefully that<br />

will resonate with someone.<br />

What has been your most satisfying<br />

moment in business?<br />

Recently, we were entered into “Best in<br />

the Region – Esthetician”, it was really<br />

surprising considering we’ve only been<br />

open 7 months. It let me know that my<br />

community appreciates me.<br />

How do you build a successful customer<br />

base?<br />

We have customers all over the globe,<br />

literally. You can’t sell yourself short and<br />

just market to those that like what you<br />

have. Let people get to know you, people<br />

buy you, not just your products. My key<br />

to that has been letting people know<br />

what I do in circles that don’t involve<br />

business. Most of my online and global<br />

clientele has come from my friends and<br />

colleagues in the screenwriting industry.<br />

We’re all going through a lot of the same<br />

things, if you’re not tapping into the fact<br />

that you can be accessed online, you’re<br />

missing out. Some folks are shy about<br />

asking, be accessible, I mean ALL your<br />

stock. It’ll be tedious but it’s so worth<br />

it. Also markedly reaching out to your<br />

existing base with a purpose. I tried<br />

newsletters that never got read. Give<br />

them something that pertains to them,<br />

research what services and products they<br />

purchased. Are you making something<br />

new in extension of that or a service that<br />

pertains to that with a discount? Make<br />

it personal.<br />

Tell our audience one thing they may<br />

not know about you.<br />

I’ve been a screenwriter for 12 years and<br />

an EP on iTunes.<br />

“What is your ‘why? ‘” Why do you<br />

do what you do?<br />

As a woman, a woman of color at that,<br />

I don’t have the liberty of not being a<br />

social activist. MindBodyMeta will<br />

always fight against Racial Injustice,<br />

Domestic Violence, Global Inequality,<br />

LGBTQ+ Discrimination and we’ll always<br />

champion Gender Equality, Human<br />

Rights, Movements for Racial Justice and<br />

Change and Mental Health Awareness.<br />

It hasn’t made me the most popular,<br />

especially in a caustic environment but<br />

it’s essential to me. It’s so important to me<br />

that my client’s feel safe and unjudged<br />

when they walk through my door and<br />

that’s why it’s so important to take care<br />

of every facet of a human being. I do it<br />

because I want to feel safe when I walk<br />

into a well-being atmosphere. I’ve been in<br />

places that didn’t make me feel welcome<br />

in this industry, I don’t want anyone to<br />

every feel like that in my “house”.<br />

When starting your business, did you<br />

ever ask yourself “WILL CUSTOMERS<br />


No not really. I started it with the<br />

intention of education. If you make<br />

people aware of the resources that are<br />

available in your location, they will<br />

eventually see the value in that and seek<br />

you out. Getting that info out there is<br />

key. You simply cannot come from “if<br />

you build it they will come” attitude<br />

and expect the flood gates to open.<br />

Educate, educate, educate!<br />

What are your plans for <strong>2021</strong> and<br />

beyond?<br />

I’m a big believer in keeping your<br />

hard work protected. We’re currently<br />

developing new trademarked stress relief<br />

products for our customers. Adrenal<br />

fatigue is commonplace now that we’re<br />

in a flight or fight response all the time<br />

whilst living through this pandemic and<br />

we want to educate you on how that<br />

can affect your body, mind and spirit<br />

and hopefully help you calm that.<br />

If you could write a book about yourself<br />

what would it be titled?<br />

132 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 133


“I get to put my energy, my hope and my expertise into everything that touches a client.”<br />

Funny enough, I currently am. It’s<br />

called “Catch 42 and 7 Lies Little Girls<br />

Are Told”.<br />

What is the best piece of advise that<br />

you have been given that has helped<br />

you in your business?<br />

“Know that your power will intimidate<br />

the ones that don’t seek their own.” It’s<br />

very easy to get caught in the loop of<br />

wanting everyone to like you or for<br />

them to understanding what you do<br />

and or doing. As long as you do and<br />

understand yourself and your mission<br />

and can stand behind it, you have to<br />

believe that what others say or think about<br />

you is none of your business. Don’t let<br />

those who don’t fully support you, tell<br />

you your journey is wrong. And don’t<br />

ask for directions from someone who<br />

doesn’t care to go where you’re headed.<br />

134 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>

...for whole body and being.<br />

MindBodyMeta<br />

100 Genesee Street, Ste. 11 Auburn, NY 13021 315-231-5065 www.mindbodymeta.com<br />

We offer these services with the purpose of<br />

challenging beliefs in reactivity and it's blockages<br />

Mind<br />

as well as trauma recovery to create a healthier<br />

mindset and trust in yourself.<br />

Women& - a safe space and educational roundtable<br />

discussion focusing on topics that women<br />

face. We cover stress, trauma and narcissistic<br />

recovery, grief, gender roles, & societal<br />

expectations.<br />

Chakra Balancing Duo - This body treatment<br />

focuses on blocked Chakra and clearing, deep<br />

relaxation and guided meditation.<br />

Guided Meditations - These can be sent to your<br />

email every week to set you on a better journey for<br />

health: Sleep Better, Stress Less, Reconnect, Align.<br />

Cognitive Behavioral Therapist,<br />

Master Herbalist, Women ' s<br />

Empowerment Counselor, Licensed<br />

Esthetician, Card Reader<br />

Mo Moshaty<br />

Mo has worked with several women's<br />

support groups across Western &<br />

Central NY as well as Eastern New<br />

Jersey. Her Therapy concentration is<br />

Trauma and Narcisstic Recovery,<br />

Mother Wound and Personal<br />

Empowerment.<br />

Esthetic Services, Herbal Education balance the body's central<br />

nervous system and integumentary system. Both carry means<br />

Body<br />

to detoxify the body to refresh and renew on a cellular level.<br />

Facials - Teen, Normal, Dry/Dehydrated, Sensitive, Againg,<br />

Hormonal, Hyperpigmented<br />

Body Treatments - Salt Glow, Mud Wrap, Chakra Balancing<br />

Herbs, Tea and Tinctures - Choose from 30 herbs and<br />

adaptogens in bulk.<br />

Lash Extensions - Perfect for anyone who loves length and<br />

fullness but no extra makeup.<br />

*Archetype Blends Adaptogen Tea coming in April*<br />

.<br />

Meta<br />

Metaphysical products and education for the<br />

purpose of expanding consciousness regarding<br />

our own spiritual path to remove blockages in the<br />

body, the spirit and relationships.<br />

Tarot & Oracle Card Readings - Perfect for anyone<br />

who feels a little lost, needs a boost or clarification<br />

on life, love, work and self.<br />

Dressing Oils, Herbs, Candles and Tinctures-<br />

Additions to your spiritual practice to enhance,<br />

calm, manifest and draw positives to you.<br />

Spiritual Counseling and Ritual Education- Learn<br />

more about your path and what you'd like to<br />

accomplish for yourself to live a more balanced<br />


136 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />






Tell us about yourself, your background,<br />

and how you started Always Chasing<br />

Better Coaching..<br />

I was an educator for almost 25 years,<br />

a teacher and administrator and spent<br />

a good part of my career creating<br />

transformation in school programs to<br />

provide better learning opportunities for<br />

students and professionals alike. After<br />

going through a personal transformation,<br />

I decided that it was time to help other<br />

women have the audacity to do<br />

the same.<br />

What is the mission behind your<br />

business?<br />

My mission is to design unique,<br />

individualized transformational<br />

support for women through<br />

training and resources while creating<br />

a diverse and inclusive community.<br />

What, in your opinion, is the<br />

most important quality in your<br />

business and the services you<br />

provide to your clients?<br />

The most important quality in my<br />

business in integrity. Who I am as<br />

a person is reflected in my business<br />

and that boils down to integrity.<br />

I stand strong in who I am and<br />

what my business is for women.<br />

Do you believe there is some sort of<br />

pattern or formula to becoming a<br />

successful coach?<br />

I think the beauty of entrepreneurship<br />

is that there is no one path to anything.<br />

My experience in developing coaching<br />

programs for teachers and administrators<br />

was one route, but there are as many<br />

different paths to coaching as there<br />

are women have the imagination and<br />

audacity to create their own way!<br />

What makes you “hustle” both<br />

personally and professionally?<br />

I hustle personally and professionally<br />

because I am a passionate feminist.<br />

I believe it the power of women to<br />

accomplish anything we set our minds<br />

to, and I love being a part of the success<br />

of my sisters.<br />

What fascinates you about helping<br />

others be the best version of themselves?<br />

I am so profoundly impacted by the<br />

uniqueness of every single woman and<br />

her journey. We all have really important<br />

stories to tell, and I believe that each<br />

of the women I meet is meant for my<br />

personal path as well.<br />

Why did you choose this profession?<br />

I am a transformer by nature. I walk<br />

into a room and want to rearrange it or<br />

redecorate it. It’s just my nature. When I<br />

began my own personal transformation<br />

a few years ago, I championed through<br />

it with a woman who coached me<br />

every step of the way. Although our<br />

transformations are often lonely and<br />

solitary work, I experienced the impact<br />

of having someone alongside me equally<br />

devoted to my success. I want to be that<br />

for others.<br />

What is the best piece of advice<br />

that you have been given that has<br />

helped you in your business, or<br />

dealing with clients?<br />

The best piece of advice I have<br />

received is to take care of myself<br />

first so that I am best equipped to<br />

run a successful business and bring<br />

my full self to my relationships and<br />

day to day life. What this means to<br />

me is that I need to take good care<br />

of my body, mind, spirit and learn<br />

something new every day.<br />

As a business owner, what are<br />

your top three priorities?<br />

I try to stay focused on three things:<br />

love, success, and abundance. These<br />

are pretty broad but every day I<br />

reflect on those areas with these<br />

questions:<br />

In what ways did I show up today<br />

leading with love?<br />

What steps did I take today toward<br />

ensuring the success of my business?<br />

How did I experience abundance today<br />

and is there a way to share that with<br />


140 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />


{<br />

{<br />

SHE<br />



}<br />

}<br />

“My mission is to design unique, individualized transformational support for women<br />

through training and resources while creating a diverse and inclusive community.”<br />

Would you do business with yourself<br />

if you were a client and why?<br />

Hell yeah! I am laser focused on helping<br />

women cross their own personal finish<br />

lines and no one celebrates BIGGER<br />

than me when my clients win!<br />

Is there one phrase or statement that<br />

you always remember and share?<br />

“Have the audacity…..” I love the word<br />

audacity. It implies a boldness, a little bit<br />

of sass and I think women who want to<br />

reinvent, evolve, or pivot in their lives<br />

need to have audacity to go get it!<br />

Do you find it helpful or hard being<br />

a female owned business?<br />

It is an amazing time to be a woman<br />

entrepreneur! Women are collaborating<br />

and coming together like we have so many<br />

times in history to show our economic<br />

and political power in numbers. This<br />

movement is different though…much<br />

more inclusive and diverse. I recognize as<br />

a white woman that I have a responsibility<br />

to all of my sisters to take them by the<br />

hand when a door opens for me. In<br />

the past, we weren’t as willing to take<br />

others along when we achieved success.<br />

Today, that is changing and it’s exciting<br />

to be a part of that dynamic. Some of<br />

the most successful, powerful women<br />

I admire are women of color who are<br />

champions for themselves, their families,<br />

and entire communities.<br />

What is your ‘why? ‘” Why do you do<br />

what you do?<br />

I have always been moved to help the<br />

underserved in our world and women<br />

are so full of amazing energy that is<br />

tapped unnecessarily. The journey of<br />

healing and growing is one of hope<br />

and victory. We can overcome any<br />

circumstance and become the woman<br />

we see inside our dreams. Living a full<br />

life to our capacity is a gift to ourselves<br />

and everyone that loves us. I want that<br />

for everyone.<br />

Who were some of the mentors that<br />

encouraged or inspired you on this<br />

journey?<br />

I have a network of women who I turn<br />

to for encouragement and inspiration;<br />

however, my wife, Anne Montreal,<br />

hands down navigates her life in such<br />

a way that I come everyday to my own<br />

life ready to be the best possible person<br />

I can be – for myself, for her and for<br />

our family!<br />

Who is your ideal client?<br />

My ideal client is a woman who has<br />

finally said, “I’ve had enough and because<br />

I’ve tried to fix this myself and because<br />

it means so much to me, I am ready to<br />

ask for help!”<br />

What are your plans for your business<br />

for the future both personally and<br />

professionally?<br />

I am in the process of building an online<br />

learning portal where a lot of the skills<br />

and strategies I use with clients will<br />

be accessible to women who are more<br />

interested in a “self-help” approach rather<br />

than a personalized coaching experience.<br />

My wife is adding an education consulting<br />

branch of the business, so I’m involved<br />

in that as well.<br />

My goal is to have both businesses<br />

sustainable and profitable while we<br />

manage them from any beach on the<br />

planet!<br />

When starting your business, did you<br />

ever ask yourself “WILL CUSTOMERS<br />


The challenge of a coaching business,<br />

especially life coaching, is that customers<br />

don’t know what it is, what it looks like<br />

or even if they would benefit from it. It’s<br />

exceedingly difficult for women to see<br />

that they don’t have to suffer and that<br />

coaching, quite different from therapy,<br />

is a doer’s way of improving your life in<br />

a relatively short period of time.<br />

Are you a born leader? Having a<br />

great idea is one thing. Being able to<br />

communicate that idea and convince<br />

others to jump on board is another.<br />

Do you feel you have what it takes to<br />

be successful?<br />

I’m the first-born child of four and<br />

always gravitate toward a leadership<br />

position. I believe that we all have what<br />

it takes to be successful, it’s whether or<br />

not we can outsmart our inner voice<br />

that’s trying desperately to keep us at<br />

our status quo. I am as successful as I<br />

let myself be!<br />

If you had the chance to start your career<br />

over again, would you do anything<br />

differently?<br />

If I had the knowledge that I’ve gained<br />

from my life’s experiences thus far, I would<br />

start my career over. At the same time,<br />

I am so grateful for the point at which<br />

I am in my life that to start over again<br />

would mean a lot of other things would<br />

be different too. I genuinely believe that<br />

I’m right where I’m supposed to be.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 141





528 PLUM STREET #108 SYRACUSE, NY 13204<br />



(315) 440-2147<br />


144 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />




Tell us about your background, and<br />

the history of Dewitt Styling Shop.<br />

I started working at DeWitt Styling<br />

Shop in 2005. It was shortly after<br />

Bob, my successor, became business<br />

partner with one of the original<br />

founders, Don. Don and Joe opened<br />

the shop in 1964. I had about 3 years<br />

of experience, mostly women’s styles,<br />

before I started there.<br />

#2 What makes you “hustle”?<br />

#3 What made you decide to<br />

become the owner of a barber<br />

shop that has over 50 years of<br />

history in <strong>CNY</strong>?<br />

#4 How do you stay abreast<br />

of the latest trends?<br />

#5 What is your signature<br />

and why?<br />

#6 What fascinates you about<br />

this line of work?<br />

#7 Why did you choose this<br />

profession of being a barber?<br />

#8 What is your most favorite<br />

service and why?<br />

#9 As a business owner now, what<br />

are your top three priorities?<br />

#10 Would you do business with<br />

yourself if you were a customer?<br />

#11 Do you walk your talk as a lady<br />

boss?<br />

#12 What changes can you make that<br />

would change everything?<br />

#13 “What is your ‘why? ‘” Why do<br />

you do what you do?<br />

#14 Who were the mentors that<br />

encouraged you?<br />

#15 What do you find is the best to<br />

promote your business?<br />

#16 What are your plans for the<br />

business for the future?<br />

#17 Do you find it hard or challenging<br />

to be a female boss in a male dominated<br />

field?<br />

#18 How do the other men treat you?<br />

#19 If you could time travel back to day<br />

one of your startup and have 15min<br />

with your former self to communicate<br />

any lessons you’ve acquired with the<br />

intention of saving yourself mistakes<br />

and heart ache, what would you tell<br />

yourself?<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 145

146 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />


{ { IN {<br />

SHE<br />


}<br />

} }<br />

“My daughter makes me hustle. Knowing I have a toddler daughter looking up to me.<br />

I need her to know she can accomplish anything she puts her mind to as well as she can<br />

have anything she desires”<br />

What is your favorite fashion<br />

accessory and why?<br />

I could not just choose one favorite<br />

fashion. LOL. I love shoes and I love<br />

me a nice purse. Both set the tone<br />

for your outfit. #13 What is your<br />

main goal for <strong>2021</strong>? My main goal<br />

for <strong>2021</strong> is to Pray, stay focused and<br />

watch all my manifestations come<br />

true. #14 What is your “must have”<br />

fashion item of the year? My must have<br />

fashion item of the year is outerwear.<br />

Must have a nice outerwear jacket/<br />

coat. My favorite coat right now is<br />

the ‘’ Color me” coat on my website.<br />

Check it out at www.Miracleslabella.<br />

com. #15 Tell us one piece of advice<br />

you would give to someone starting<br />

their own business in <strong>2021</strong>.<br />

Be yourself, do your research, don’t<br />

rush the process and never be afraid<br />

to ask for help if its needed and keep<br />

your faith.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 147

150 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />





Tell us about yourself, your background,<br />

and how you decided to open KW<br />

Fitness.<br />

I was born and raised in Syracuse, and<br />

graduated from CNS back in 2003.<br />

My background is in sales and marketing,<br />

and I’ve been an entrepreneur since I<br />

was 19! I moved down to Binghamton<br />

in 2009 to start a sales and recruiting<br />

business and successfully broke every<br />

record that territory previously held<br />

for that company.<br />

My husband Kevin is a Certified<br />

Personal Trainer, who graduated from<br />

the American Academy of Personal<br />

Training in Boston in 2011. He started<br />

privately training clients shortly after<br />

he graduated, and opened the doors<br />

to our first KW Fitness studio down<br />

in Vestal in March of 2014.<br />

When we were looking at our future<br />

together, we decided it would be best<br />

to close down the business I had at the<br />

time and work on growing KW Fitness<br />

together because it was more aligned<br />

with our objectives and family goals.<br />

What is the mission behind your private<br />

personal training and nutrition studio?<br />

Our mission is To Deliver Health and<br />

Fitness Results that Last a Lifetime. We<br />

do this by teaching people maintainable<br />

habits, with accountability and guidance.<br />

What, in your opinion, is the most<br />

important quality in your business<br />

and what you provide your clients?<br />

I would say our most important quality<br />

in our business is our culture. We are<br />

solely a Private Personal Training studio,<br />

so our clients like the comfortable, nonintimidating<br />

atmosphere. It’s not like<br />

a typical “gym” that packs classes and<br />

lacks support & accountability.<br />

Do you believe there is some sort of<br />

pattern or formula to becoming a<br />

successful entrepreneur male or female?<br />

I believe that it doesn’t matter someone’s<br />

background, upbringing, past, financial<br />

situation, or even education.<br />

To be a successful entrepreneur, the<br />

most common things that I’ve seen is<br />

having tenacity, drive, grit, persistence<br />

and resilience.<br />

What makes you “hustle” both<br />

personally and professionally?<br />

For me personally, I hustle because I know<br />

that the only person who can determine<br />

my future is me. I have the power to<br />

choose the effort that I put in every<br />

single day. Having an entrepreneurial<br />

spirit in corporate America or while<br />

working for someone else will only<br />

get me so far!<br />

What inspires you in doing what<br />

you do?<br />

I’m inspired by helping people to live<br />

longer, healthier, more fulfilling lives.<br />

I’m also inspired to lead by example for<br />

my children, to create a bright future<br />

for them, and to do Kingdom Work.<br />

I truly believe in what we do here at KW<br />

Fitness, so it makes it much easier to<br />

get out of bed in the morning!<br />

Why did you choose to open a<br />

private facility? You hold your clients<br />

accountable, but who does that for<br />

you?<br />

We chose to open a private facility<br />

because we want to be able to work<br />

with people on a personal level and<br />

help them achieve their goals hands on.<br />

Most of our clients are people who<br />

don’t like the “big gym” setting and<br />

want a more personal feel.<br />

For our own accountability, since<br />

day 1, we have always invested in a<br />

business coach.<br />

We believe that the only way to continue<br />

to grow, and to keep lifting our people<br />

up, is to keep growing ourselves.<br />

The most dangerous way to think is to<br />

think you know all there is to know as<br />

an entrepreneur. Surrounding yourself<br />

with people who have been there before<br />

and who can challenge your thinking is<br />

the way to continue improving!<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 151



“When we were looking at our future together, we decided it would be best to close down<br />

the business I had at the time and work on growing KW Fitness together because it was<br />

more aligned with our objectives and family goals.”<br />

What is the best piece of advice that<br />

you have been given that has helped<br />

you in your business?<br />

“Don’t look beside you to see what<br />

everyone else is doing. Don’t look to<br />

see who is ‘setting the bar’. BE the bar.<br />

Look to outlast everyone else. The only<br />

business you should be competing against<br />

is the business you were yesterday.”<br />

I can’t remember what book I read that<br />

in, and it’s not word for word, but it really<br />

resonated with us and has helped us to<br />

stay level-headed, even during such an<br />

unpredictable year.<br />

As a business owner, what would you<br />

say are your top 3 priorities?<br />

Top 3 priorities:<br />

1) Profitability (so we can be around<br />

long term)<br />

2) Taking care of our team<br />

3) Taking care of our clients<br />

Is there one story of triumph and<br />

accomplishment that stands out from<br />

the rest either with yourself or a client?<br />

For us as a business, I’ll never forget a<br />

terrifying moment that we had back in<br />

March of 2017. We weren’t correctly<br />

projecting our cash flow and it looked<br />

as if we were going to be in the red<br />

within a few weeks. Like, to the point<br />

where we couldn’t pay our team or our<br />

bills. I literally couldn’t sleep that night.<br />

The next day, we got to work. We were<br />

going to do whatever it took to make<br />

it happen and to never look back. We<br />

created a new campaign, threw what<br />

little advertising dollars we had behind<br />

it on Facebook, and got 27 clients that<br />

month (our goal is usually around 9 net<br />

clients). We learned our lesson and like<br />

I said, we have never had a moment like<br />

that ever again!<br />

Is there one phrase or statement that<br />

you always remember and has inspired<br />

you or stuck with you?<br />

My favorite quote of all time, and honestly<br />

I think it’s been my life mantra, is the<br />

following quote from Charles Swindoll:<br />

“The longer I live, the more I realize the<br />

impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me,<br />

is more important than facts. It is more<br />

important than the past, the education,<br />

the money, than circumstances, than<br />

failure, than successes, than what other<br />

people think or say or do. It is more<br />

important than appearance, giftedness or<br />

skill. It will make or break a company... a<br />

church... a home. The remarkable thing<br />

is we have a choice everyday regarding<br />

the attitude we will embrace for that<br />

day. We cannot change our past... we<br />

cannot change the fact that people will<br />

act in a certain way. We cannot change<br />

the inevitable. The only thing we can<br />

do is play on the one string we have,<br />

and that is our attitude. I am convinced<br />

that life is 10% what happens to me<br />

and 90% of how I react to it. And so<br />

it is with you... we are in charge of our<br />

Attitudes.”<br />

What services do you provide your<br />

customers that makes you a one stop<br />

shop for health and nutrition that is<br />

different from others?<br />

Personalized nutrition and exercise<br />

programs for our clients, customized<br />

to each individual. Not “cookie cutter”,<br />

one size fits all type-thing.<br />

“What is your ‘why? ‘” Why do you<br />

do what you do?<br />

My “why” is to make an impact on<br />

the world in whatever capacity that I<br />

can. I believe every person is here for<br />

a reason, and I personally believe that<br />

I’m here to help people live up to their<br />

full potential. As a person of faith, I<br />

do what I do as if I’m not working for<br />

myself. It’s not about me.<br />

Who were some of the mentors that<br />

encouraged or inspired you on this<br />

journey?<br />

My mom has always been an inspiration<br />

to me. She had me at a really young age<br />

and had to leave behind her dream of<br />

attending music school as a very young<br />

mom. She started out as a bank teller<br />

making minimum wage, to now being<br />

the Sr. Vice President of Retail Sales at<br />

Seneca Savings Bank. She has taught<br />

me the art of the hustle! Her leading by<br />

example has inspired me to not settle<br />

and always go after what you want :)<br />

What are your plans for your business<br />

for the near future and further out,<br />

let’s say 5 to 7 years?<br />

Our plans are to continue growing<br />

so we can create stable careers for our<br />

Personal Training staff. We’ll be starting<br />

the process of opening our 3rd location<br />

in about a year, and we want to continue<br />

helping our clients achieve their health<br />

& fitness goals!<br />

When starting your business, did you<br />

ever ask yourself “WILL CUSTOMERS<br />


I personally have never thought about<br />

this, but when we started to really narrow<br />

down our “client avatar” (target market)<br />

is, the question of “WHY does this<br />

152 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


“We are solely a Private Personal Training studio, so our clients like the comfortable, nonintimidating<br />

atmosphere.”<br />

person need us” came up, and we started<br />

clarifying what our “Mrs. Jones” (ideal<br />

client) really looked like.<br />

Are you a born leader? Having a<br />

great idea is one thing. Being able to<br />

communicate that idea and convince<br />

others to jump on board is another.<br />

Do you feel you have what it takes to<br />

be successful?<br />

I’ve been told that I’m a natural leader,<br />

so I started to believe it and I’m ok with<br />

that :) I work hard at every endeavor<br />

I get myself into. If (God forbid) our<br />

business closed tomorrow, I would find<br />

another avenue to be successful.<br />

If you had the chance to start your career<br />

over again, would you do anything<br />

differently?<br />

If I had the chance to start my<br />

entrepreneurial career all over, I would<br />

tell myself to act as if I couldn’t fail, and<br />

not listen to my own head trash! I used<br />

to overthink and overanalyze way too<br />

much. I once heard from a mentor of<br />

mine “don’t think, just work!”, and it<br />

was super helpful in helping me to get<br />

out of my own head!<br />

What is the one word you clients would<br />

use to describe you?<br />

They would probably say that I’m<br />

optimistic!<br />

154 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


Fayetteville's Premier Personal Training Studio<br />

PRIVATE.<br />

SAFE.<br />


RESULTS.<br />

Personal Training and Nutrition Coaching.<br />

Call for a complimentary consultation:<br />

315-400-3252<br />


156 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />





Tell us a little bit about yourself and<br />

how you started the Sacred Goddess<br />

Box, LLC.<br />

Greetings Goddesses! My name is Tracy<br />

Donaldson and I am a woman who wears<br />

many hats. I am a Mother, Daughter,<br />

Sister, Friend, Nurse, Goddess Steam<br />

Practitioner, and Entrepreneur. Rochester,<br />

New York is where I was born, raised<br />

and of course reside. Coming from<br />

a family of a Jamaican decent - the<br />

importance of family, hard work,<br />

and dedication has been instilled in<br />

me from a very young age which I<br />

owe to my parents. However, I have<br />

to give credit to attending The first<br />

HBCU, Lincoln University, for<br />

instilling in me great core values,<br />

being a woman of integrity, as well<br />

as a leader.<br />

What exactly is the Sacred Goddess<br />

Box, LLC?<br />

Sacred Goddess Box, LLC’s is a<br />

holistic practice focusing on feminine<br />

wellness. The highlighted service<br />

provided is using hydrotherapy<br />

through Yoni (vaginal) Steaming.<br />

Yoni steaming also known as V-Steam<br />

is a non-invasive, self-care, holistic<br />

practice where women sit over a pot<br />

of warm organic herbal steam. The<br />

warm (never hot) steam permeates<br />

the exterior of the vagina and up<br />

into the womb. Women find this<br />

service to be very relaxing. The vagina<br />

is porous like a sponge and because it<br />

is so porous, it can easily absorb the<br />

medicinal properties and oils of the<br />

organic herbs that are used. I blend my<br />

herbs so they are tailored to my clients<br />

needs rather it’s for a refresher to if she’s<br />

trying to conceive to everything else<br />

in between. Yoni steaming has a range<br />

of physical, emotional, and spiritual<br />

benefits such as:<br />

• Reducing menstrual cramping and<br />

symptoms of PMS<br />

• Helps with odor<br />

• Decreases heavy menstrual flow<br />

• Regulates irregular or absent periods<br />

• Helps with postpartum healing and<br />

toning<br />

• Helps with those suffering from<br />

idiopathic infertility<br />

• Aids with uterine fibroids, ovarian<br />

cysts, and endometriosis<br />

• Help with strengthening the pelvic<br />

floor and tightens the vaginal canal<br />

• Helps to restore natural “good” bacteria<br />

and ph balance to aid in prevention<br />

of yeast infections, bacterial vaginosis<br />

and odor<br />

• Relieves symptoms of menopause such<br />

as dryness or pain during sex<br />

• Detoxifies the womb and body<br />

• Helps to release stored emotions &<br />

anxiety<br />

• Helps to activate feminine energy<br />

by allowing women to tap into<br />

their creativity<br />

• Relieves tension and induces<br />

relaxation<br />

• Helps with insomnia<br />

• Can help aid in healing from<br />

past sexual trauma<br />

Other services that are offered<br />

here at Sacred Goddess Box, LLC<br />

are Womb Stimulation, Womb<br />

Clay pack, Ionic Foot Detox,<br />

Ear Candling, and Post-Surgical<br />

Lymphatic Drainage as well as Body<br />

Contouring will be available soon.<br />

The entrepreneurial journey<br />

is not an easy one. It requires<br />

determination, time, hard work<br />

and leadership. What motives<br />

you and keeps you going?<br />

What motivates me are the women<br />

I have thus far encountered on<br />

this journey. Many women have<br />

entered my suite with the weight<br />

of the world on their shoulders. To see<br />

that weight lifted by the end of their<br />

session and to see the smiles on their<br />

faces as they are leaving let’s me know I<br />

am walking in my purpose. I love doing<br />

this. It never feels like a work. It’s like<br />

I get to hang out with my girlfriends<br />

every day!<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 157

158 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“ Sacred Goddess Box, LLC’s is a holistic practice focusing on feminine wellness.”<br />

How do you find new clients? What<br />

has been your biggest success?<br />

Finding new clients isn’t an easy task.<br />

There are several women to my knowledge<br />

in the Rochester area who offer these<br />

services. So there is definitely a selection<br />

to choose from. However, by word of<br />

mouth, client testimonials, awareness,<br />

educating, and advertising on social<br />

media, the word gets around to other<br />

women. The women who are meant for<br />

me find themselves at Sacred Goddess<br />

Box, LLC.<br />

What made you decide to get into such<br />

a unique business?<br />

I’ve always wanted to be a business<br />

owner. In 2018, I was out of work for<br />

approximately 5 months. I used that<br />

time to research different successful<br />

small businesses. I learned that feminine<br />

wellness was on the rise. I recalled visiting<br />

a friend in Atlanta where we had a Yoni<br />

Steam. I really enjoyed the experience<br />

and wished there was something similar<br />

offered in Rochester. So I figured, how<br />

hard could it be to throw herbs in a pot<br />

of boiling water? Unbeknownst to me,<br />

it was way more than that. Since I was<br />

unaware of any actual businesses who<br />

provided Yoni Steaming, I decided to<br />

try my hand. I found a certification<br />

program in Atlanta that taught the art<br />

of Yoni steaming. It was a three day<br />

program and by the end I became a<br />

Certified Goddess Steam Practitioner.<br />

I opened my business to begin in my<br />

home and have since opened a suite in<br />

October of 2020.<br />

Where do you see yourself in five years?<br />

In 5 years, I see my business expanding<br />

to a larger location where I am able to<br />

offer services to multiple clients at at time<br />

without disrupting the sacred experience<br />

that I now provide to my clients.<br />

What kind of person do you feel makes a<br />

successful female entrepreneur especially<br />

in <strong>2021</strong>?<br />

In <strong>2021</strong>, a successful female entrepreneur<br />

first and foremost has to believe in herself.<br />

She has to believe in what she is setting<br />

out to accomplish before anyone else<br />

believes in it. To know that she will be<br />

knocked down a multitude of times and<br />

it’s up to her to picker herself up, brush<br />

herself off and keep pushing forward.<br />

To have the mentality to not be afraid<br />

to ask for help. To know that there may<br />

be many women doing the same thing<br />

she is doing but she has to remember no<br />

one has the same recipe that she holds.<br />

And her only competitor should be<br />

herself! Because who God has for her<br />

is for HER and no one else.<br />

What makes you hustle?<br />

There are 3 things that make me hustle.<br />

One, if I want to eventually run my<br />

business full time I have to work hard.<br />

I cannot get to where I want to be if I<br />

don’t put the work in. So knowing my<br />

vision and where I want to eventually<br />

take Sacred Goddess Box, LLC keeps<br />

the hustle going. Two, the women I<br />

encounter. I have learned since doing<br />

this, there are so many women dealing<br />

with reproductive ailments, lack of vision,<br />

sexual traumas - to be able to talk with<br />

them, set goals, come up with a plan<br />

pertaining to whatever it is they are<br />

going through in life - to help them set<br />

their intentions and watch it manifest is<br />

truly rewarding for me. Getting positive<br />

results makes me want to go harder for<br />

our women. And three, I have people<br />

who look up to me. I have to set an<br />

example. Mom/Godmom/Auntie is<br />

not a quitter. I’m going to finish what<br />

i started. I’m paving the way to show<br />

them anything can be accomplished<br />

if you put your mind to it and put in<br />

the work.<br />

Who has been someone who has inspired<br />

you in your profession and why?<br />

Tracey Bryant-Swint, Alchemist and<br />

Queen of the V-Steam, has played a major<br />

role in inspiring me on my professional<br />

path. She’s who I gained my knowledge<br />

from. She is absolutely amazing and a<br />

go-getter! She’s so knowledgeable; always<br />

seeking to learn more to heighten her<br />

craft so she can come back and educate<br />

her mentees. Because of her, we’re always<br />

up to date on the latest and greatest<br />

when it comes to feminine wellness.<br />

Watching her makes me want to do<br />

more, learn more, and be greater.<br />

What do you think are the top 5<br />

qualities of a great female entrepreneur<br />

are?<br />

• Life-Learner<br />

• Integrity<br />

• Vision<br />

• Confidence<br />

• Courage<br />

• Respect. Sorry I had to throw in an extra<br />

What is your favorite part of your<br />

business and why?<br />

I love meeting the different women I<br />

have encountered. They come from<br />

many walks of life ranging 14 to 75<br />

years of age. I love hearing their stories.<br />

I love learning from them. And I am<br />

honored to have have been able to help<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 159


{ HEIDI’S LAW }<br />


“Many women have entered my suite with the weight of the world on their shoulders. To<br />

see that weight lifted by the end of their session and to see the smiles on their faces as they<br />

are leaving let’s me know I am walking in my purpose.”<br />

What would you say are your strengths?<br />

My greatest strength is my ability to<br />

listen. Listening is to empathize. It gives<br />

the speaker a sense that I care about<br />

their well-being and I’m there to help.<br />

Listening is Power.<br />

If you could time travel back to day<br />

one of your startup and have 15min<br />

with your former self to communicate<br />

any lessons you’ve acquired with the<br />

intention of saving yourself mistakes<br />

and heart ache, what would you tell<br />

yourself?<br />

To not second guess<br />

myself. To tune out the<br />

naysayers and that my<br />

biggest supporters will be<br />

those I least expect. If I<br />

would have known this<br />

in the beginning, there<br />

would have been many<br />

thing I would not have<br />

taken personally.<br />

What would you say is<br />

your greatest professional<br />

accomplishment to date?<br />

My biggest accomplishment<br />

to date has been helping 4<br />

women who were told they would<br />

never have a baby, conceive and birthed<br />

beautiful beings.<br />

What’s the best advice you have received<br />

in business that you wish to pass on<br />

to our readers?<br />

All money isn’t good money. It’s okay<br />

to tell a potential client that you cannot<br />

service them. It’s important to protect<br />

your energy and your space.<br />

What did you do before opening the<br />

Sacred Goddess Box, LLC?<br />

Before opening my business I was and<br />

currently work as a Master prepared<br />

Registered Nurse for a local hospital<br />

here in Rochester as a coordinator for<br />

the Department of Surgery.<br />

How did you come up with the name<br />

for your company?<br />

In the art of Yoni Steaming, the word<br />

“Yoni” means “Sacred” space. A<br />

“Goddess” is a female deity. Goddesses<br />

have been linked with virtues such as<br />

beauty, love, sexuality, motherhood,<br />

and fertility. As women we must know<br />

and embrace that. So hence “Sacred<br />

Goddess” and then there is “Box”. It can<br />

mean one of two things: either a square<br />

object that can store items (in this case<br />

the throne or stool women sit over to<br />

steam) or woman’s vagina. And there<br />

you have it, Sacred Goddess Box, LLC.<br />

What’s your favorite thing to do in<br />

your free time?<br />

During my free time, I enjoy cooking,<br />

reading for knowledge as well as for<br />

entertainment, and I also enjoy traveling.<br />

Unfortunately, due to COVID traveling<br />

has been limited.<br />

What is Number One Business Goal<br />

you plan to accomplish over the next<br />

year?<br />

My number one goal is to begin<br />

gathering data for a research article<br />

on Yoni steaming. Where I am a firm<br />

believer and can testify on the benefits<br />

of Yoni steaming, unfortunately there is<br />

not a lot of research out there.<br />

Being a nurse educator, it is<br />

important for me to have the<br />

data to back what I preach.<br />

Tell our readers one thing<br />

they may not know about<br />

you.<br />

I am a woman who has<br />

experienced sexual trauma<br />

as a child. Childhood into<br />

my adulthood was extremely<br />

hard. I suffered from<br />

depression and insecurities. I<br />

made many poor decisions.<br />

But what saved me was being<br />

able to heal and release those<br />

demons that haunted me daily. Before I<br />

embarked on this business journey, I had<br />

to self reflect. I had to love myself again.<br />

I had to forgive my abuser knowing I<br />

would never get an explanation or an<br />

apology. There is no way I could provide<br />

my services to women if I didn’t address<br />

my personal issues first. I was able to<br />

accept what happened to me, forgive,<br />

and release. Once I came to a place<br />

of peace, everything fell into place. I<br />

had to heal first before being able to<br />

heal others.<br />

160 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 161

162 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />




Tell us about what A Rose Is Still A<br />

Rose Outreach...<br />

“A Rose Is Still A Rose”. (A.R.I.S.A.R.)<br />

is a non-profit organization created for<br />

young girls and women. We are made<br />

up of a group of committed women,<br />

injected with various community<br />

partners who are dedicated to the<br />

growth and development of young<br />

girls and women within the Rochester<br />

community.<br />

How did you start the non-profit<br />

and why?<br />

As a social worker<br />

I have worked with<br />

women and young<br />

girls for over 10 years’,<br />

experience advocating<br />

and serving historically<br />

underserved<br />

populations dealing<br />

with substance abuse,<br />

trauma, and mental<br />

health concerns. I<br />

worked for a great nonprofit<br />

organization<br />

which helped me to grow, but most<br />

of the organization had limitation on<br />

who they could serve and if they didn’t<br />

meet the criteria most was turned away.<br />

A Rose Is Still A Rose Outreach is<br />

designed to serve all young women from<br />

all walks of life. I started with a vision<br />

which help me move to planning. I<br />

enrolled into a Master’s program, Master<br />

of Science in Strategic Leadership at<br />

Roberts Wesleyan College. This gave<br />

me more understanding on how an<br />

organization is operated and as well<br />

helped me to identify what type of<br />

leader I am and strive to be.<br />

What challenges did you face when<br />

starting up a non-profit? Any advice<br />

for others in the same situation?<br />

There wear many challenges and still<br />

till this day. I’m finding out my vision<br />

is much bigger than I thought it was..<br />

My advice would be to stay the course<br />

for this is a marathon not a sprint. Be<br />

patient for there is a time and season<br />

for everything. Always leave room to<br />

grow and learn.<br />

What is the mission behind A Rose<br />

Is Still A Rose?<br />

Mission<br />

A Rose is still a Rose is a non-profit<br />

organization created for young girls<br />

and women. Our focus is to support<br />

young women in finding an optimistic<br />

approach in life. Through positive<br />

encouragement and cultivation of their<br />

vision and purpose (life goals), we assist<br />

by providing the necessary resources<br />

to assist them with overcoming the<br />

obstacles of life.<br />

Vision<br />

A Rose is still A Rose will be a consistent<br />

blossoming sisterhood and garden of<br />

support for young women within<br />

the Rochester community. Through<br />

outreach, empowerment and growth,<br />

we will help every rose bloom where<br />

they are planted.<br />

What has your organization<br />

accomplished to date?<br />

Due to the pandemic my organization<br />

could not fully fulfill its obligation to<br />

serve in the magnitude of which it<br />

would have like to. But we still was<br />

able to raise money and help four<br />

families during the<br />

holidays, as well as<br />

make donations to<br />

women which help<br />

towards schooling,<br />

starting up a business,<br />

shelter, clothing, and<br />

council.<br />

Can you share one<br />

or two stories of<br />

individuals whose<br />

lives have been<br />

changed because of<br />

your organization?<br />

There is a young women who came to<br />

me and used the services of me being her<br />

life coach. We have been connected for<br />

over a year now. But she recently came<br />

to me because she was struggling in<br />

many areas and needed help on finding<br />

her own way and purpose. With our<br />

services I was able to see her growth<br />

and dedication. She is now an intern<br />

for ARISAR, and she is flourishing<br />

and setting goals for herself.<br />

There was also other young women<br />

who was starting her own hair salon<br />

business. ARISAR was able to provide<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 163


“A Rose is still A Rose will be a consistent blossom<br />

women within the Rochester community. Through<br />

help every rose bloom wh<br />

164 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


ing sisterhood and garden of support for young<br />

Outreach, Empowerment and Growth, we will<br />

ere they are planted.”<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 165


“ A Rose is still a Rose is a non-profit organization created for young girls and women.<br />

Our focus is to support young women in finding an optimistic approach in life.”<br />

resources as well as money and help<br />

go toward her business which is now<br />

up and running.<br />

What makes you hustle?<br />

Knowing that there is so much<br />

more to see and experience<br />

in life. I want myself and my<br />

family to be in a position to<br />

live the fulfillment of life<br />

without limitations.<br />

What are your organization’s<br />

goals this year?<br />

To encourage women to<br />

become a part of the ARISAR<br />

sisterhood by registering<br />

for a free membership<br />

on our website. www.<br />

stillaroseoutreach.com<br />

Once registered in our free<br />

program, each rose will be<br />

eligible to receive support<br />

in the following areas below<br />

and so much more.<br />

Services<br />

o Building positive<br />

relationships/Sisterhood<br />

o Weekly newsletters<br />

o Tutoring, Mentorships<br />

and life & social skills<br />

development<br />

o Self-love/Healthy<br />

relationships<br />

o Community service<br />

o Parenting support<br />

o Goal setting<br />

o Financial literacy<br />

o Career Exploration & Professional<br />

Development<br />

o Skill Building (i.e. facing insecurities,<br />

rejection, abuse and anger.)<br />

How can donors help other than<br />

making financial contributions?<br />

Donors can help by volunteering their<br />

time and knowledge. If donors have<br />

free space available to host different<br />

workshops that would be helpful as well.<br />

What is one thing you have done that<br />

you do not regret?<br />

The one thing I have done that I do not<br />

regret is investing in myself. Whether<br />

that be financial, further education,<br />

seeking counsel and ect.<br />

What is most important<br />

to you and why at this<br />

point in your life?<br />

What’s most important to<br />

me right now is financial<br />

wealth, not just for myself<br />

but my family and my<br />

community. I grew up with<br />

a poverty state of mind,<br />

and I now understand<br />

the important of breaking<br />

generational curses.<br />

What is your favorite part<br />

of doing what you do?<br />

Motivating women who are<br />

willing to overcome their<br />

current challenges and are<br />

continuously encouraged<br />

to strive for independence<br />

as they are inquest to reach<br />

their current life goals. By<br />

Supporting them to ensure<br />

that they have the tools<br />

to be successful in their<br />

endeavors and will continue<br />

to have the support<br />

necessary. Ultimately,<br />

becoming effective leaders<br />

and change-agents within<br />

the community in which<br />

they live.<br />

As a business owner, what<br />

are your top three priorities?<br />

1.To continue to think futuristic,<br />

meaning staying current on the changes<br />

that happening around the world.<br />

166 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 167


“My plan is to be transparent as possible so my reader can see not only am I educated in<br />

these subjects, but I had to walk them out as well to get to where I’m at today.”<br />

2. Networking and utilizing valuable<br />

resources.<br />

3.To stay focused on the<br />

purpose.<br />

Where do you see A Rose<br />

is Still A Rose in the next<br />

year? What about 3 years<br />

from now?<br />

In the next year I would like<br />

to see ARISAR moving in full<br />

gear. Workers and volunteers<br />

in place. Weekly and monthly<br />

workshops being provided to<br />

give support to the women<br />

that we what it means to<br />

be free.<br />

What provoked you to<br />

start this book?<br />

I saw a documentary<br />

from Michelle Obama<br />

called ‘Becoming’, In her<br />

documentary she quotes<br />

“what seem like nothing<br />

to you is your power”<br />

this touch me because I<br />

questioned myself about<br />

writing a book about my<br />

life. Asking myself who<br />

would want to read about<br />

me? Not knowing that<br />

each of us has a story that<br />

can save or Inspire someone<br />

else. Its important for me to<br />

live in my purpose. Being<br />

a Life Coach is what I’m<br />

inspired to do. Helping<br />

other walk out their traumas, fears,<br />

grief, unforgiveness, and give them<br />

skills on leadership development,<br />

purpose, selflove, which will allow<br />

them to see their power.<br />

What are your intention with putting<br />

this book out?<br />

My intention is to promote my brand.<br />

Allowing my reader to see why I am<br />

qualified to be a life coach on these<br />

subject matters. My plan is to be<br />

transparent as possible so my reader<br />

can see not only am I educated in<br />

these subjects, but I had to<br />

walk them out as well to get<br />

to where I’m at today. And<br />

that I’m still doing the work.<br />

What do you plan for the<br />

readers to take from this<br />

book?<br />

I want my readers to<br />

understand you don’t have to<br />

live within the circumstances<br />

you were given if it doesn’t<br />

align with your purpose and<br />

who you are today. Make the<br />

changes and do the work to<br />

be better each day. The most<br />

important thing is to live your<br />

purpose to your best ability,<br />

within your constraint. A lot<br />

of time we allow our past<br />

traumas to keep us feeling<br />

Anger, a shame, sad, hopeless,<br />

which cause Anxiety, fear,<br />

unforgiveness. But when you<br />

decide I want better for me,<br />

or I know longer want to be<br />

in this place that is the first<br />

step towards your freedom<br />

and healing. I want my readers<br />

to feel ready and confidence<br />

to take on this journey and<br />

face that thing that has held<br />

them back from living in<br />

peace, joy, love, prosperity,<br />

most of all their purpose.<br />

168 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 169

A Rose Is Still A Rose Outreach LL<br />

A.R.I.S.A.R<br />

Tiffany J. Anderson, MSL<br />

Director of Program<br />

(585) 363-3311<br />

E-mail: aroseissillarose101@gmail.com<br />

Website: www.stillaroseoutreach.com<br />

Speaker | Mentor | Life Coach | Consulti

C<br />



“MY GOAL<br />

IS TO MAKE<br />

EVERY<br />



AND<br />



WWW.MONTIMAKEUP.COM I (315) 395-6793<br />


174 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />






As it has been over one year that we have<br />

been living through a pandemic, taking<br />

care of ourselves might be more important<br />

than ever.<br />

For the last 15 years as a psychotherapist,<br />

I have been drawn towards not only<br />

helping clients with mental health issues,<br />

but also empowering them to improve<br />

their overall wellness. My clinical work<br />

and research has shown me that we<br />

cannot only improve one area of our<br />

life if we want to see lasting lifestyle<br />

changes. Yet so many people do not<br />

fully understand the construct of<br />

wellness, rightfully so, because in<br />

today’s society wellness and self-care<br />

have become somewhat of a fad.<br />

Taking care of yourself should not<br />

simply be about buying the latest<br />

wellness supplements marketed on<br />

Instagram, expensive devices found<br />

on popular wellness blogs, and quick<br />

fixes that promise wellness with no<br />

lifestyle changes. Being well is a<br />

lifestyle. It involves finding harmony<br />

in life, rather than struggling and<br />

often not succeeding when trying<br />

to find balance in the everyday.<br />

Wellness is complex and dynamic,<br />

in that how we move through the<br />

world will always change. Some days we<br />

will feel great and ready to take on<br />

challenges, while other days we feel<br />

tired and may need to stay in bed a bit<br />

longer. Both are okay. It is necessary that<br />

we listen to our body and our mind to<br />

determine what is right for us.<br />

When I work with women, I help them<br />

explore how they understand their own<br />

personal wellness and how to create<br />

meaningful change. My approach is<br />

different from many other wellness<br />

practitioners because I do not only focus<br />

on the why, but more so the how. It is<br />

easy for blogs and wellness gurus to<br />

tell you why you need to improve your<br />

wellness - better health, better<br />

relationships, better strength, better<br />

performance, and so on. We all know<br />

why. The challenge that many people have<br />

is the how, especially when determining<br />

how to make lasting change. However,<br />

ask yourself the following two questions,<br />

“How do I understand my current state<br />

of wellness? How do I want to optimize<br />

my wellness?” These questions can be<br />

more difficult to answer, because it<br />

requires introspection and self-motivation.<br />

This is where my role as a holistic<br />

psychotherapist comes into play.<br />

Throughout years of scholarly research,<br />

I realized that overall wellness is robust.<br />

Many wellness experts speak about<br />

specific factors that affect wellness or<br />

specific habits that we should develop to<br />

improve our lives. Some only focus on<br />

diet and nutrition, some might include<br />

other aspects like mindfulness. Though<br />

these aspects for wellness are relevant,<br />

I have found that an element that is<br />

often missing from the discussion is<br />

identity. Identity is often overlooked in<br />

wellness models and wellness practices,<br />

but it is critical to how we understand<br />

our overall wellness and how we<br />

pursue lifestyle changes.<br />

As I continue to explore wellness<br />

and identity development, though<br />

my clinical work and research, I see<br />

that the two constructs intersect.<br />

I have seen this in several ways:<br />

1. How you think about yourself.<br />

First, how people think about<br />

themselves affects wellness. For<br />

example, if you are someone who<br />

wants to improve your physical<br />

health by exercising, it may be<br />

challenging for you if you are<br />

embarrassed by your weight and<br />

are ashamed to be seen exercising.<br />

Your perception of yourself will<br />

limit your ability to determine<br />

how you can make changes to that<br />

part of your life, which will ultimately<br />

improve your overall wellness. Again, it<br />

is easy for someone to tell you why you<br />

need to improve your physical health,<br />

but the how can be more complicated.<br />

2. How to make changes. It can also<br />

be difficult to understand how to make<br />

changes if you do not understand yourself.<br />

Today we hear about and read about<br />

so many examples of ways to improve<br />

our wellness. Case in point, blogs and<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 175

{ ASK THE DOCTOR }<br />

“As you can see, wellness is more than just a fad and it more than just the why. Wellness<br />

is also more than just the treatment (e.g., medication, therapies, mindfulness, exercise,<br />

diet, etc.).”<br />

social media often write about new<br />

diets that will improves our lives. One<br />

blog might give support for a Keto diet,<br />

another might recommend fasting, and<br />

a third might be in favor of a vegan diet.<br />

How do you choose? If you struggle to<br />

understand your own needs, whether they<br />

are physical, emotional, or ethical, you<br />

might jump around from one fad diet to<br />

another. In such cases, it is important<br />

for your to explore what is important<br />

to you and what do you need. Perhaps<br />

you have a job that is demanding and<br />

only allows a brief<br />

period of time to eat during the day,<br />

making a fasting diet challenging.<br />

Or perhaps you morally choose not<br />

to include animal protein in your<br />

diet, making a Keto diet difficult as it<br />

eliminates many of the central foods in<br />

this diet (e.g., seafood, cheese,<br />

poultry, and eggs). Understanding<br />

what your lifestyle needs and sense of<br />

self are helps you determine how to<br />

make changes.<br />

How to make commitments. One critical<br />

part of identity development is making<br />

commitments. If one does not explore<br />

their interests, it might hard to make<br />

commitments, or at least commitments<br />

based on what you actually want in life.<br />

If one does not take the steps above to<br />

determine how to improve wellness, it<br />

will be difficult to commit to change. Let’s<br />

consider mindfulness practices, something<br />

that I often discuss with clients. Research<br />

shows that mindfulness practices have a<br />

significant impact on stress reduction,<br />

lowering anxiety, improving focus and<br />

memory, improving<br />

relationships, and even immune<br />

functioning. For many, when they<br />

think of mindfulness practices they<br />

think of meditating in silence for an<br />

hour. But what if this doesn’t work for<br />

your schedule? What if you hate sitting<br />

in silence? Rather than deciding to start a<br />

mindfulness practice based on whatever<br />

the latest fad tells you to do, it is more<br />

important to determine what you enjoy<br />

and how that will work for you. If you<br />

are short on time, maybe your practice<br />

will be a few minutes of deep breathing<br />

guided by your smart watch. Or if<br />

you like movement, your mindfulness<br />

practice might be determining which<br />

form of yoga you are most drawn to and<br />

whether or not you practice from home<br />

or in a studio.<br />

As you can see, wellness is more than<br />

just a fad and it more than just the<br />

why. Wellness is also more than just the<br />

treatment (e.g., medication, therapies,<br />

mindfulness, exercise, diet, etc.). Instead<br />

wellness is a lifestyle practice that<br />

includes understanding your identity<br />

and thoughtfully determining how to<br />

make changes.<br />

After many years of working with clients<br />

and exploring wellness and identity, I<br />

began developing a model of wellness<br />

called the Optimum Wellness Model.<br />

This model of wellness is comprised of<br />

five wellness identities - physical identity,<br />

emotional identity, spiritual identity,<br />

relational identity, and performance<br />

identity - all of which make up your<br />

core holistic wellness identity. The core<br />

identity is how you identify with and<br />

understand your holistic self. From a<br />

clinical perspective, this refers to your ego.<br />

When working with clients at my private<br />

practice, I help them navigate what<br />

changes they want to make, how they<br />

understand who they are as a person<br />

and what barriers they experience, and<br />

to empower them to determine how<br />

they can make changes.<br />

The outcome of our work together is<br />

success, not only defined by me, but<br />

also defined by my clients. Together<br />

we identify the why and explore the<br />

how. Through this process, we look at<br />

the foundation and formation of self<br />

that create emotional and behavioral<br />

problems. Through a client-centered<br />

approach, we also consider how we<br />

can improve the client’s overall sense<br />

of well-being.<br />

If you are engaging in a new wellness<br />

journey, I encourage you to ask yourself<br />

not only “Why do I need to improve<br />

my wellness?,” but also “How can I<br />

improve my wellness?”<br />

Dr. Sarah F. Spiegelhoff is a licensed mental<br />

health counselor in private practice at Dr.<br />

Spiegelhoff & Associates. She specializes in<br />

holistic wellness and integrative health,<br />

adolescent and young adult mental health,<br />

and family counseling. In addition to her<br />

work with clients, Dr. Spiegelhoff is also<br />

a part-time professor for the graduate<br />

counseling program at SUNY Oswego. If<br />

you are interested in learning more about<br />

the Optimum Wellness Method, by signing<br />

up for the Dose of Wellness newsletter, you<br />

will receive a free Introductory Optimum<br />

Wellness Plan. For more, visit drspiegelhoff.<br />

com or contact her at sarah@drspiegelhoff.<br />

com.<br />

176 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>

178 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />







Why We Need the Female Form of<br />

Leadership to BE UNSTOPPABLE!<br />

You want to play bigger, be unstoppable<br />

and be a powerful woman! You want<br />

to embrace life, even with incredible<br />

challenges we are facing. You want more!<br />

What is the vehicle that will get you<br />

there? Leadership! But, I am not talking<br />

about “Old Guard” leadership, it is<br />

the Female Form of Leadership that<br />

will get you the success you deserve<br />

and desire.<br />

You may know that your leadership<br />

is the key to unlocking the door to<br />

success. And as you unlock the doors<br />

of change with leadership evolution,<br />

you can begin to move to the other<br />

side of where you are today and<br />

access what you want.<br />

Women have a contribution to<br />

make to leadership: the biggest<br />

contribution is in accepting and<br />

honoring that there can be a new<br />

way of approaching our leadership. In<br />

order for life and business to change<br />

and produce prosperity, we must<br />

invest in becoming powerful leaders.<br />

And reshape how we see modern-day<br />

leadership.<br />

In order to really change we have to face<br />

the reality of what is no longer working<br />

in leadership and make a choice to<br />

become the catalyst for change.<br />

This is where being UNSTOPPABLE<br />

comes in. We have to choose to break<br />

through past programming of leadership<br />

that is holding us stuck. This process<br />

takes an unstoppable attitude and inner<br />

strength.<br />

Women must choose a new<br />

paradigm of female leadership that is<br />

confident,courageous, successful, and<br />

prosperous.<br />

Once you have realized a new way of<br />

leading in the world is essential for success,<br />

then you can dive into releasing your<br />

stuck behaviors in a way that facilitates<br />

a new life that you desire.<br />

Ask yourself:<br />

Where am I today as a female leader?<br />

And where does the female form of<br />

leadership fit into your paradigm shift?<br />

Do you believe you can lead?<br />

These are important questions to answer<br />

in your journal because humans face<br />

some serious obstacles and in order to<br />

get through them we must reshape how<br />

we view leadership and begin to act in<br />

new ways. It begins with you!<br />

So let’s begin the process of reshaping<br />

your leadership so you can become<br />

super successful!<br />

The process starts with a reality check<br />

and a self exploration.<br />

Reality Check! Where are we<br />

today as leaders? And what is<br />

not working in leadership?<br />

In order to make fast changes<br />

that will reorganize healthier<br />

behaviors,we have to examine<br />

how we currently lead. Then<br />

we can understand where we<br />

need to go.<br />

Female Leadership has a specific<br />

form but it is rejected due to<br />

misunderstanding.<br />

In my trainings and coaching,<br />

women report:<br />

• Leadership is repulsive and<br />

not for her.<br />

• Leadership is aggressive and<br />

controlling.<br />

• They want nothing to do with<br />

leadership.<br />

• They have heard it all before about<br />

leadership.<br />

• Leadership is dry and boring. It is<br />

analytical.<br />

• Leadership is not for women.<br />

And, women tell me that they believe<br />

leaders of all kinds (and at all levels)<br />

have become aware that traditional<br />

leadership methodologies no longer<br />

serve us as humans.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 179


“You want to play bigger, be unstoppable and be a powerful woman! You want to<br />

embrace life, even with incredible challenges we are facing. You want more! ”<br />

Below, these women define leadership.<br />

Let’s call those who embrace the following<br />

qualities and styles as the most important<br />

leadership qualities “The Old Guard.”<br />

It’s a system that is the Patriarchy and<br />

has been severely masculinized:<br />

• Headstrong<br />

• Intellectual<br />

• Analytical<br />

• Masculine<br />

• Hierarchical<br />

• Non-feeling<br />

• Non-emotional<br />

• Pain IS gain<br />

• Put your head down and go<br />

• Suit and tie<br />

• Division between masculine and<br />

feminine<br />

• Who do I know<br />

• It’s a big boy’s club<br />

• Domination<br />

• Control<br />

• Feminism acknowledged but woman<br />

NOT accepted<br />

When you read these definitions, you<br />

can easily see how the descriptions and<br />

styles do not correspond with modern<br />

leadership or modern thinking and ways<br />

of life. Women have not really had the<br />

chance to rise up and achieve success;<br />

we are still being held back and held<br />

down in an Old Guard world. In order<br />

to rise up and achieve success, we must<br />

bridge the gap between all leadership<br />

styles and accept that there are new<br />

ways of leading that must be honored<br />

and respected!.<br />

The old guard taught women to put up<br />

and show up no matter what sacrifices<br />

needed to happen. They taught us drive,<br />

aggression, and ambition over feeling<br />

love and life/work balance. They taught<br />

us to drive to the point of breaking and<br />

then be FIXED! Instead of taking care<br />

of yourself along the way and investing<br />

in your preventative healthcare and<br />

authentic leadership style.<br />

To reclaim your female form of leadership<br />

and embody the power your desire, the<br />

first step is to realize and release the<br />

stress cycle, break through this habitual<br />

patterning and program a new form of<br />

EMPOWERED leadership into our<br />

daily lives.<br />

The empowered leader driven by<br />

female consciousness, will take time<br />

and dedication to create. And ultimately<br />

this process begins with YOU! We need<br />

YOU as the Female Form of Leader! In<br />

order to reset to a more relaxed, creative<br />

flow of leadership you have to let go of<br />

old stressful habits holding you down.<br />

This is a process of reshaping yourself<br />

into a healthy, empowered leader and<br />

it takes a totally new paradigm shift.<br />

Are you ready?!<br />

Modern-day, success driven women want<br />

to be emotionally present, dynamic,<br />

heart centered, community based,<br />

collaborative, connected and intuitive.<br />

And these women want money to flow<br />

to their businesses and lives. Women<br />

want to have it all!<br />

Beyond bridging the gap discussed<br />

above, the Female Form of Leadership<br />

is necessary to inspire other people to<br />

change. When we change, others will<br />

be inspired to do so; it’s an exponential<br />

factor, a domino effect.<br />

As you let go of the worn-out, stress<br />

induced, clunky patterns of Old Guard<br />

leadership you will begin to gain the<br />

prosperity and abundance that you<br />

desire. You will begin to reclaim your<br />

power from the negativity and disruption<br />

caused by old forms of leadership that<br />

no longer fulfill us. No matter what,<br />

the female form of leadership the one<br />

that is emotional, creative, and intuitive,<br />

will provide you with the unstoppable<br />

success you truly want.<br />

Start today! Embrace that there is a<br />

new way to lead and it begins with you!<br />

Being a successful female leader means<br />

that you are good with the fact that you<br />

might just have a mission, a destiny, or<br />

a purpose. That you want to tap into<br />

the deeper resources inside of your<br />

healthy body to access your real and<br />

authentic form of leading. That you<br />

want to tune into your core and listen<br />

to your intuition. That you want to<br />

thrive instead of merely survive. By<br />

reprogramming your leadership into a<br />

new female form of Core Intelligence<br />

(CQ) you will be able to access all the<br />

things you want in your life.<br />

This is where manifestation gets real,<br />

with the Female Form of Leadership!<br />

Be Unstoppable and develop your true<br />

female leadership with CQ!<br />

Dr. Pam Denton coaches leaders and<br />

businesses in the new era of leadership.<br />

Driving new business success with Core<br />

Intelligence (CQ). Visit Dr. Pam for her<br />

business coaching at www.supercorefit.<br />

com/executive-coaching<br />

180 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 181

182 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />


{<br />







With LGBTQ+* terms, identities, and<br />

cultural norms constantly changing, it’s<br />

difficult for allies to keep up. We may<br />

feel intimidated by all the changes and<br />

silenced by the fear that we’ll accidentally<br />

say something that will offend someone.<br />

We probably will. We all do.<br />

People often think I’m joking when<br />

I say that being an ally is an ongoing<br />

journey of messing up, but it’s true.<br />

We mess up with somebody (for<br />

example, we might accidentally use<br />

the wrong pronoun). We make an<br />

appropriate apology (more on that<br />

in a moment). We forgive ourselves<br />

(not always as easy as it sounds). We<br />

put in the work to get it right the<br />

next time (savvy ally tips for that are<br />

coming up). We share what we know<br />

with others (non-judgmental ally-toally<br />

conversations are so important).<br />

Repeat (oops…we mess up again in<br />

some other way).<br />

I’ve been actively messing up as an<br />

ally to the LGBTQ+ communities for<br />

two decades now, so I’m an expert.<br />

Formerly the Education Director at the<br />

Out Alliance (Rochester’s LGBTQ+<br />

center), I now run my own small business<br />

called Savvy Ally Action. My goal is to<br />

increase people’s confidence in having<br />

respectful conversations with each other<br />

and to jumpstart even the most tentative<br />

LGBTQ+ ally.<br />

So, let’s look more closely at the process<br />

of how to mess up properly, as this is key<br />

for being a great ally to any marginalized<br />

community.<br />

The Blunder: We may blunder by<br />

accidentally using an offensive, outdated<br />

term (for example, the “gay lifestyle”),<br />

making assumptions by using gendered<br />

language (for example, “Take this<br />

form home to mom and dad.”), or<br />

misgendering someone by using the<br />

wrong pronoun, as mentioned above.<br />

Since I recently made the pronoun<br />

blunder myself during an interaction<br />

at Starbucks, I’ll use this as my example<br />

as I walk through the process.<br />

The Apology: The first thing that needs<br />

to happen after I blunder is that I need<br />

to make an appropriate apology. The best<br />

way to do this is to imagine that I just<br />

bumped into the person on the street. I<br />

wouldn’t walk past the person without<br />

saying anything, because that’s rude. But<br />

I also wouldn’t make a huge deal out<br />

of it, begging them for forgiveness and<br />

sobbing on their shoes. I would simply<br />

say something like, “Oh, excuse me” or<br />

“I’m sorry.” When I misgender someone<br />

I feel terrible, and my tendency is to<br />

over-apologize. Here’s the problem with<br />

that. Even though apologizing profusely<br />

may make me feel better, it’s likely to<br />

make the person I messed up with feel<br />

worse. It will draw a lot of attention<br />

to my blunder. It can also pull<br />

the focus of the conversation<br />

on to me and how badly I feel.<br />

Then I can end up in situations<br />

where the person I messed up<br />

with is trying to make me feel<br />

better. Awkward! So, a quick<br />

and simple, “I’m sorry,” is best.<br />

Forgiving Yourself: Oh, it sounds<br />

so easy, doesn’t it? I find that I<br />

can beat myself up for weeks<br />

over an incident like the one I<br />

described above. What I try to<br />

do when I mess up is remind<br />

myself of three things. First,<br />

that I’m human. Second, that<br />

mistakes make me think about<br />

issues, make me more aware<br />

of my language, and help me<br />

become a better ally. And third, that my<br />

mess-ups help me connect with others<br />

when they make the same blunder.<br />

Getting It Right the Next Time: Here’s<br />

the big moment that separates the eagles<br />

from the slugs! (How’s that for getting<br />

creative with ungendered language ?) I<br />

can either forget all about this incident<br />

and write it off as “no big deal,” or I can<br />

do the work to get it right the next time.<br />

Here are a few tips that have helped me.<br />

1) Try again right away. If I’m still in a<br />

conversation with the person I messed<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 183


{ THE SAVVY ALLY }<br />

“People often think I’m joking when I say that being an ally is an ongoing journey of<br />

messing up, but it’s true.”<br />

up with, I make a point of using the<br />

correct pronoun right away. This helps<br />

to cement it in my brain and shows<br />

the person that I’m actively working<br />

to get it right.<br />

2) Practice in my head. Running what<br />

I’m about to say through my head<br />

before it comes out of my mouth has<br />

proven a very successful strategy for<br />

fixing my errors.<br />

3) Write it down. When I write<br />

things down I’m more likely<br />

to remember them. So, for<br />

example, I might write, “Jo<br />

(they/them),” somewhere where<br />

I see it often. Adding people’s<br />

pronouns after their name in<br />

my phone contacts also helps.<br />

4) Practice on your pet: If<br />

you struggle with nonbinary<br />

pronouns, like singular they,<br />

you’re not alone. Lots of folks<br />

find these and other nonbinary<br />

pronouns difficult to master.<br />

One way you can become more<br />

proficient at using nonbinary<br />

pronouns is to use them when<br />

talking about your pet. Most pets don’t<br />

mind being referred to as they as long<br />

as you remember to feed them on time<br />

and occasionally scratch their heads.<br />

(Tip credit goes to my friend, Kayden.)<br />

5) Imagine a mouse. Another tip for<br />

getting singular they right is to imagine<br />

the person has a mouse in their pocket.<br />

“They are coming to dinner. Get out<br />

the mini cheese tray!” (Tip credit goes<br />

to my friend, Eridan.)<br />

Sharing What We Know: A great role<br />

for allies is to step in, with patience<br />

and kindness, when we hear someone<br />

blunder and share what we’ve learned.<br />

Members of marginalized communities<br />

should not have to be the ones always<br />

educating others. A great strategy for<br />

starting a conversation with someone<br />

who’s just blundered is to demonstrate<br />

your vulnerability by using a connecting<br />

statement like, “I used to use that word<br />

too” or “I also messed up their pronouns<br />

last week.” Then go on to share why<br />

you changed your language or tips that<br />

have helped you get pronouns correct.<br />

Blunder Again: Yup. It’s going to happen.<br />

Here’s an inspirational story to help you<br />

embrace the journey.<br />

Years ago, my friend Sean, who was<br />

assigned “female” at birth, began his<br />

transition to male. Early on in his<br />

transition he and I would often get called<br />

“ladies” at restaurants, and it would bum<br />

him out for hours. One day, Sean and I<br />

were at a racquetball club and we were<br />

asked by a staff member for our driver’s<br />

licenses, in order to borrow racquets.<br />

She looked at the licenses (probably<br />

noting Sean’s name and “M” gender<br />

marker), finished our paperwork, and<br />

then looked up and said, “Okay ladies!<br />

Let me show you the courts.” Her face<br />

immediately turned red, and she said,<br />

“Oh! I mean guys.” Then she looked even<br />

more embarrassed and said, “I mean…<br />

friends.” And then she put<br />

her head down and scurried<br />

off ahead of us to the courts,<br />

looking like she wanted to run<br />

out the nearest door. When<br />

we got to the court and the<br />

woman left us, Sean turned<br />

to me with a big smile on his<br />

face and said, “I love her for<br />

that. I love that she worked<br />

so hard to get it right.”<br />

* Lesbian, gay, bisexual,<br />

transgender, queer/<br />

questioning, plus so much<br />

more!<br />

Jeannie Gainsburg is an awardwinning<br />

LGBTQ+ educator, consultant,<br />

and author. If you’re seeking more<br />

ally tips and information on how to<br />

create LGBTQ+ inclusive spaces, please<br />

check out her book, The Savvy Ally: A<br />

Guide for Becoming a Skilled LGBTQ+<br />

Advocate, available on Amazon and<br />

through the Monroe County Library<br />

System. To schedule a workshop or to<br />

access free educational goodies, go to<br />

www.savvyallyaction.com.<br />

184 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 185

188 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />






Every once in awhile I get to experience<br />

some amazing sights and meet the most<br />

friendly folks you could imagine. As a<br />

kid, me and brother and sisters would<br />

enjoy a few days in Vine Valley staying<br />

with my father’s parents summer cottage<br />

on the southern tip of Canandaigua<br />

Lake near the town of Naples New<br />

York. It was uncomplicated time<br />

where we would spend the morning<br />

either swimming in the shallows or<br />

attempting to gather minnows along<br />

the shoreline beach.<br />

If we had the luxury<br />

of having a little bit<br />

of loose change, then<br />

it meant we could<br />

venture into the<br />

penny candy store<br />

which was a short<br />

walk away where<br />

we could spend an<br />

amount of time<br />

staring at the options<br />

of ordering lengths of<br />

dot candy, stranges<br />

of thin licorich, a<br />

pockets full of gum<br />

balls, or jaw breakers<br />

to munch on or trade<br />

between ourselfs.<br />

When our grandfather saw us getting<br />

restless he would pack the five onto<br />

the motor boat for a tour of the lake<br />

front where we would wave at anyone<br />

hanging out on the summer afternoon<br />

before arriving back ahead of dusk<br />

to find long straight sticks to roast<br />

hot dogs over the oven pit fire under<br />

cooked to what seemed like perfection,<br />

but most likely more undercooked as<br />

soon as one of us felt their dog was<br />

ready we all decided to eat together<br />

smoothing the buns with ketchup and<br />

mustard along a plastic glasses filled<br />

from pitchure of ice cold kool aid or<br />

lemonaid and a helping of macroni or<br />

potato salad. It was a real treat to go<br />

into the town of Naples to the most<br />

favorite restaurant where we could all<br />

find individual stools at the counter<br />

to order a delicious cheese burger and<br />

French fries. There wasn’t much talking<br />

until the meals disappeared while my<br />

grandparents ate at a booth. It was<br />

a place where the summer residents<br />

pretty much knew each other after<br />

years of repetitions.<br />

I traveled down thru Naples and notice<br />

the Bob and Ruth’s sign and quickly<br />

decided to stop in reminisce about<br />

the days gone by and broke into a<br />

conversation with the owners while<br />

eating my favorite meal. I’m not sure<br />

if it was the chatting about the past<br />

or the quality of the Riesling, but I<br />

wanted to have this restaurant and the<br />

wonderful staff serve my wine. Either<br />

way they didn’t hestitate to buy a case<br />

and they showed me the lounge area<br />

called The Vineyard appropriately<br />

where I’m sure the locals would have<br />

con gengated on the weekend nights<br />

to soci alize. But everytime I pass thru<br />

it’s a must stop.<br />

This time it was closed for the season as<br />

my trip designation way focused was a<br />

business meeting at the Pleasant Valley<br />

Wine Company in Hammondsport<br />

NY located on the<br />

bottom of Keuka<br />

Lake. When first<br />

starting into<br />

winemaking I<br />

was hired by Mel<br />

Goldman at Keuke<br />

Lake Vineyard<br />

known at KLV.<br />

I was working<br />

thirteen hour days<br />

in the winery on<br />

weekends helping<br />

out prior to their<br />

bottling run. I<br />

would stay in the<br />

winemakers loft<br />

overnights and<br />

would complete all<br />

the duties in the winery preparing the<br />

batches of wine including transferring<br />

the wine between tanks “racking” and<br />

thoroughly cleaning the tanks before<br />

returning the wine. KLV received<br />

the first 90 point rating with Wine<br />

Spectator for their vintage of Dry<br />

Rieslings. When you visit be sure to<br />

spend a few minute longer to learn<br />

about the steep vineyard slopes of the<br />

property that create the wonderful<br />

grapes..<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 189


“Every once in awhile I get to experience some amazing sights and meet the most friendly<br />

folks you could imagine.”<br />

Pleasant Valley Wine Company is located<br />

a bit further south of the Hammondsport<br />

and is the oldest winery in the Finger<br />

Lakes as the first bonded winery in<br />

the nation in 1860. I had no idea<br />

about the storied history of Pleasant<br />

Valley and the American Champagnes<br />

brands produced on the campus of<br />

buildings including Gold Seal and<br />

Great Western among many others. I<br />

was escorted into the main office and<br />

up the stair to the gorgeously wooded<br />

conference room.<br />

Agness Wine<br />

Cellars arrived to<br />

discuss options of<br />

working together.<br />

It was simply me<br />

flanked by the<br />

Doyle’s Mike<br />

the President and<br />

his son Patrick,<br />

the sales director<br />

Matthew Healy.<br />

Mike Doyle was<br />

interested in<br />

Agness Riesling<br />

made in the<br />

Finger Lakes so<br />

I offered a sample<br />

of our Riesling to<br />

share at the meeting, after generous<br />

compliments, then the real discussions<br />

began in how we could work together<br />

on a new wine project.<br />

Once completed, I was offered a<br />

a real treat - a personal tour of the<br />

sprawling facility and interconnecting<br />

production areas over many floors,<br />

buildings by Matthew Healy. Along<br />

the way, I viewed the rows upon<br />

rows of absolutely huge winemaking<br />

tanks of various sizes. As we ventured<br />

further on the tour, I was simply<br />

amazed at each and every turn of<br />

winemaking spaces and architecture<br />

along the way over many levels. This<br />

is a must see tour and wine tasting<br />

which is able to support hundreds<br />

of visitors daily. Even the pictures<br />

stunning photos can’t portray the<br />

size emormany of the operations and<br />

the simply beautiful historic spaces<br />

where visitor are able to drink wine<br />

for special events supported by the<br />

numberous consecutive kitchens to<br />

needed for various events thoughout<br />

the year. Eight of the original Great<br />

Western buildings are actually listed<br />

on the National Registry of Historic<br />

Places. Their wine caves with bricked<br />

arched ceilings may have been all lost<br />

if it wasn’t for the efforts of Doyle<br />

Family when purchased and restored<br />

the winery and vineyards. Beyond<br />

the massive number of cases of<br />

Champagne finished annually, Sherry<br />

and its processing is a sight not to<br />

be missed by both the serious wine<br />

enthusiast and those wanting to see<br />

the working history of winemaking on<br />

a grand scale. When first started 100<br />

gallons of wine was produced, now<br />

having the capacity of 14 millions<br />

gallons with 500 vineyard acres.<br />

The name Great Western received its<br />

name from a pronouncement as “the<br />

Great Champagne<br />

of the Western<br />

World.” I could go<br />

on and on about<br />

the transitions of<br />

ownership which<br />

is now back under<br />

local control of the<br />

Dolye Family, but<br />

this is a destination<br />

requiring a<br />

personal visit to<br />

truly appreciate<br />

finishing in the<br />

Pleasant Valley<br />

visitor tasting room<br />

for some Great<br />

samples.<br />

192 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


AGNESS<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 193


}<br />



Fearless: is the absence of fear. Are you<br />

allowing fear to stop your growth? If<br />

so, why? Fear is simply an emotion<br />

that can be controlled by changing<br />

your mindset, but many people let fear<br />

consume them. It can paralyze your<br />

body and stop you from becoming<br />

the best version of yourself.<br />

Imagine yourself living a fearless<br />

life, going after everything you<br />

dreamed. You’re setting goals<br />

and executing them one by one<br />

and setting realistic timeframes.<br />

Your boldness, brave heart,<br />

and courageous spirit set you<br />

apart from others.<br />

Life can throw us curve balls.<br />

Those unexpected circumstances<br />

can cause us to worry, stress,<br />

have anxiety or even depression.<br />

However, when we learn to<br />

be fearless on our journey, we<br />

overcome our fears. Facing<br />

our fears can be simple as<br />

confronting our concerns, the<br />

obvious, and or hidden demons.<br />

It includes facing those fears<br />

that are too embarrassing to<br />

confess (like the fallout from<br />

a dumb misunderstanding or<br />

the consequence of making bad<br />

choices) and those symptoms of<br />

fear that we may not understand<br />

(like change in our sleep<br />

patterns, eating habits, or panic<br />

attacks). However, the biggest<br />

downfall of fear is its hinderance to<br />

fulfilling our purpose.<br />

Have you ever heard the saying<br />

that one of the wealthiest places<br />

on earth is the cemetery? Well, it<br />

is true. Various studies have shown<br />

that 98% of people die with their<br />

dreams. Only two percent of people<br />

die with their dreams fulfilled. I can’t<br />

help but imagine that fear plays a<br />

huge factor in people dying with<br />

unfulfilled dreams. Just think of<br />

how many people die having these<br />

great ideas that they never pursued,<br />

it only made it to the idea stage. An<br />

idea with no action behind it is just<br />

a thought. They saw the vision but<br />

never created the reality. Imagine<br />

how many had dreams to be doctors,<br />

lawyers, teachers, dieticians, models,<br />

writers, or public speakers but feared<br />

they weren’t good enough, worried<br />

about what others would think, or<br />

didn’t have the money to pursue their<br />

dreams, etc. Don’t allow fear to stop<br />

you from serving your purpose.<br />

If you had told me five years<br />

ago, I would be an author and<br />

speaker I probably would have<br />

thought you were crazy. Heck,<br />

if you would have told me I<br />

would graduate college and<br />

become a columnist, I would<br />

have laughed. I always wanted<br />

to be a speaker, but I was too<br />

shy, lacked confidence, and told<br />

myself my vocabulary wasn’t big<br />

enough to become a speaker. I<br />

always wanted to write a book,<br />

I even started writing an urban<br />

book when I was younger, but<br />

fear discouraged me. I wrote<br />

between10–30-page papers that<br />

would be ripped apart by my<br />

professors in college, making<br />

me feel like I wasn’t a strong<br />

writer, but I graduated with a<br />

B average.<br />

Now I write monthly columns,<br />

and I am entering into grad<br />

school. I tell you this because if<br />

I had allowed fear to stop me, I<br />

wouldn’t be where I am today,<br />

inspiring others to do the same; be<br />

fearless. I could have given up, but<br />

where would that have gotten me?<br />

Being fearless is about perseverance<br />

and being ready to face anything<br />

that comes your way. Those little<br />

194 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


}<br />

“We are brave, strong, limitless, courageous, bold and FEARLESS.”<br />

hiccups on your journey are just<br />

strength testers that show you how<br />

strong you are.<br />

The first step to any recovery process<br />

is admitting there is a problem (I am<br />

scared). The second step is identifying<br />

the issue (like I fear heights, but why<br />

do you fear heights?). Admitting<br />

your fears helps, it shows you are<br />

self-aware. Journaling helps a lot too.<br />

Write down the woman you would<br />

be or how life would look for you if<br />

you didn’t have fear in the way. Then,<br />

write down your goals (in black pen),<br />

after, write down what’s stopping you<br />

from achieving those goals (in red pen<br />

next to each goal), next write down<br />

(with a green pen) how you would<br />

accomplish those goals.<br />

For the first three days, review your<br />

goals and fears. On the fourth day,<br />

cross out everything you wrote in<br />

red pen, so now all you are focused<br />

on are your goals and how you will<br />

execute them. You should have a shift<br />

in your mindset. After that, nothing<br />

to it but to do it! After 21 days, this<br />

will become a habit. Remind yourself<br />

each day of your goals and how<br />

you will accomplish them. Nothing<br />

happens overnight, so take your time<br />

and embrace your journey. Fear will<br />

creep up and make you feel helpless<br />

and as if you’re not enough. Just<br />

know, you are enough and more<br />

than capable of becoming the woman<br />

you are destined to become. Work at<br />

your goals daily, stay persistent and<br />

consistent. Us women hold so much<br />

power. We are brave, strong, limitless,<br />

courageous, bold and FEARLESS.






Too much to do and too little<br />

time…. always! It’s the story of<br />

our lives, because well... the more<br />

responsibilities we have, the more<br />

life demands of us.<br />

If you want to look at what’s<br />

demanding straight in the eyes,<br />

send me your address, and I will<br />

ship you a 42 inch, 42 pound four<br />

year old child and a<br />

bowl of candy for a<br />

weekend.<br />

I ASSURE YOU…..<br />

sweeter than the tooth<br />

of a child, are their<br />

will, dedication and<br />

relentless persistence<br />

to get what they desire.<br />

We all once were<br />

children ourselves,<br />

so what the hell<br />

happened?<br />

If you’re physically,<br />

emotionally and<br />

mentally exhausted<br />

by the end of your<br />

days, chances are your attack on<br />

your demands has become a little<br />

less intensified. Life becomes a<br />

big squeeze, and often the things<br />

we care most about suffer.<br />

Perhaps it’s time to re-route?<br />

What brings life fulfillment is not<br />

completing a daily checklist of<br />

to-dos. What we desire more of<br />

in our lives deserves to be tended<br />

to, and it’s time we make the time!<br />

Balancing, breathing and stretching<br />

are crucial to our personal and<br />

professional development. Without<br />

balance we have no stability,<br />

without stretching we are unable<br />

to see how limitless our potential<br />

is, and without taking a moment<br />

to breathe, we lose sight of who<br />

we are.<br />

Demand what’s right for you, by<br />

asking “What more do I want”<br />

and consider how the choices you<br />

make today will affect your future.<br />

Time and space are limited, so it’s<br />

wise to be conscious of how you<br />

delegate each of your precious<br />

moments, and let go of what no<br />

longer positively serves your life.<br />

Set loose that relentlessly persistent<br />

child within, and take steps towards<br />

pursuing the life you’ve always<br />

dreamed.<br />

Happiness and accomplishment<br />

await and YOUR happiness is<br />

forever WORTH<br />

demanding.<br />

- Amanda Ashley<br />

Live Videocast every<br />

M/W/F livestreamed<br />

and archived at<br />

w w w .<br />

afternooncocktail.show<br />

Subscribe to Afternoon<br />

Cocktail on Youtube!<br />

Available on Itunes,<br />

Spotify, I heart Radio,<br />

Stitcher, Amazon<br />

Music, Google Music,<br />

Alexa, etc, so catch up<br />

on your inspiration<br />

and keep spreading good energy<br />

to those around you!<br />

200 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 201

202 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



}<br />





Let’s face it, no one gets married to<br />

get divorced. It is the death of a<br />

dream. If you or someone you know<br />

is going through a divorce, it’s time<br />

to get prepared for emotional and<br />

financial challenges.<br />

Even the most amicable<br />

divorce brings major<br />

life changes. Having the<br />

guidance of a qualified<br />

team will put the odds in<br />

your favor to emerge from<br />

divorce in a financially<br />

stable place where both<br />

parties believe the divorce<br />

settlement was fair. There<br />

are three key professionals<br />

you may want on your<br />

divorce team – A therapist,<br />

divorce attorney and/or<br />

mediator, and financial<br />

planner who specializes in<br />

divorce planning, preferably<br />

one who is a Certified<br />

Divorce Financial Analyst®<br />

practitioner.<br />

A CDFA® practitioner is<br />

skilled at analyzing the<br />

financial issues of divorce.<br />

His/her role is to help the<br />

client and attorney understand how<br />

financial decisions made today will<br />

impact the client’s financial future. The<br />

process provides an objective view of<br />

settlement offers and counterproposals<br />

and may suggest a different way to<br />

negotiate vs. taking matters before<br />

a judge.<br />

What are the realities of divorce?<br />

• Plan to live on less income: Divorce<br />

often results in going from a twoperson<br />

income in one household to<br />

two households with one income each.<br />

It is important to understand what<br />

your household budget was while<br />

you were married and be prepared<br />

for what it will look like post-divorce.<br />

Your attorney and CDFA® practitioner<br />

work as a team to determine what<br />

income to each is fair and equitable.<br />

• Not all assets are equal: The taxation,<br />

liquidity, and future growth potential<br />

of an asset all need to be considered<br />

in the division of assets. One spouse<br />

generally wants to keep the family<br />

home. Think twice about that. The<br />

family home has upkeep/maintenance,<br />

property taxes and consumes cash<br />

flow for daily living. There may be<br />

a vacation home or cottage as well<br />

as pre-tax IRA or 401(k) accounts.<br />

Understand that different assets may<br />

be taxed differently. Take this into<br />

account when dividing assets.<br />

• Don’t let emotions rule: Be<br />

thoughtful about your financial future<br />

and that of your children,<br />

if applicable. Knowledge<br />

and rational thought are<br />

key to negotiating a fair<br />

and equitable settlement.<br />

By working with a CDFA®<br />

practitioner (a neutral<br />

third party), it becomes<br />

easier to treat your<br />

settlement in a thoughtful<br />

manner.<br />

• Wait, we had more assets<br />

than this! It is common<br />

for one spouse to try to<br />

hide assets. Gather at least<br />

three years of tax returns<br />

to look for differences<br />

compared to what is being<br />

disclosed today. A CDFA®<br />

practitioner is trained to<br />

take a deeper dive.<br />

• QDRO? What’s that? A<br />

QDRO (qualified domestic relations<br />

order) is a judicial order used to divide<br />

employer retirement plans in a taxfree<br />

manner. Be sure to confirm with<br />

the plan provider that QDROs are<br />

allowed. It is important that QDROs<br />

are transacted properly or taxes and<br />

penalties may apply.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 203


}<br />

“Let’s face it, no one gets married to get divorced. It is the death of a dream.“<br />

• Don’t rush to sign: It took years<br />

to accumulate your wealth. Take<br />

enough time to question if your final<br />

divorce decree is equitable (does not<br />

necessarily mean equal).<br />

• Make sure your interests are insured:<br />

If spousal and/or child support are<br />

being paid as part of the settlement,<br />

consider life and disability insurance as<br />

a requirement. This ensures payments<br />

will continue to be made in the event<br />

of pre-mature death or disability of<br />

the payer.<br />

The goal is to make informed<br />

decisions while going through the<br />

divorce process and yield the best<br />

financial outcome possible. As CDFA®<br />

practitioners, we are happy to meet<br />

with you (virtually or in person) to<br />

review your options. Please contact<br />

us today.<br />

*Securities and insurance products are offered<br />

through Cetera Investment Services LLC,<br />

member FINRA/SIPC. Advisory services are<br />

offered through Cetera Investment Advisers LLC.<br />

Neither firm is affiliated with the financial<br />

institution where investment services are offered.<br />

1816 Penfield Rd, Penfield, NY 14526<br />

Investments are: *Not FDIC insured *May lose<br />

value *Not bank guaranteed *Not a deposit<br />

*Not insured by any federal government agency.<br />

Donna L. Cator, CFP®, CDFA®, is Vice<br />

President, Wealth Advisor, CNB Wealth<br />

Management, Canandaigua National Bank &<br />

Trust Company. She can be reached at (585)<br />

394-4260 x50623 or by email at DCator@<br />

CNBank.com. Margaret M. Whelehan,<br />

CDFA®, is Vice President, Financial Advisor*,<br />

CNB Wealth Management, Canandaigua<br />

National Bank & Trust Company. She can<br />

be reached at(585) 394-4260 x42129 or by<br />

email at MWhelehan@cnbank.com.<br />

204 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>









Our people apply their unique expertise<br />

to meet your distinct goals.<br />

At CNB Wealth Management, we’ve assembled a team of experienced,<br />

noncommissioned, and highly credentialed professionals, working in your best<br />

interest to meet your needs.<br />

Everyone looks at wealth differently—each with their own goals and dreams.<br />

That’s why ourur CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER professionals, trust and estate<br />

attorneys, investment advisors, and the region’s best trust officers work closely<br />

with you—and with each other across their areas of expertise—to develop a<br />

comprehensive wealth solution to achieve your goals now and for the long term.<br />

rochester<br />

600 East Avenue<br />

canandaigua<br />

72 South Main Street<br />

basin park<br />

1150 Pittsford-Victor Road<br />

And no matter the size of your relationship, you’ll receive concierge-level service,<br />

backed by our proprietary Pledge of Accountability*—our commitment to deliver<br />

the service and experience you deserve.<br />

CNBank.com/WealthManagement | (585) 419-0670 | Trust powers since 1919<br />

*To see the full version of our CNB Pledge of Accountability, visit CNBank.com/Pledge. Investments are not FDIC insured, not bank deposits, not obligations of, or guaranteed by, Canandaigua National<br />

Bank & Trust or any of its affiliates. Investments are subject to investment risks, including possible loss of principal amount invested. Investments and services may be offered through affiliate companies.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 205

<strong>APRIL</strong> <strong>2021</strong> TRAIN TO LEARN<br />


































OF OVER $1200)<br />





208 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



{ SCALP NY }<br />


FEMALE<br />




You rarely see women getting bald unlike<br />

men. Although the data shows males<br />

have a higher percentage of hair loss<br />

(alopecia) compared to females, they<br />

do get them, even looking for solutions<br />

cosmetically like scalp micropigmentation<br />

services for ladies.<br />

The content of this article is to<br />

thoroughly discuss what every woman<br />

must know about receding hairline,<br />

its symptoms, causes, preventions,<br />

and treatment, to ensure healthy hair<br />

follicles keep growing in long term.<br />

In other words, here’s what you can<br />

do if you have uneven hairlines or<br />

hair loss.<br />


Losing hair is an everyday occurrence<br />

that happens as part of a normal<br />

conditions for most people; it is normal<br />

to lose approximately 100 hairs a day.<br />

The hair thinning slowly and gradually<br />

falls out, then new hair grows back<br />

again. But some circumstances may<br />

point to a possibility that receding<br />

hairline in women is problematic<br />

when it exceeds the normal count.<br />

Signs and symptoms of hair loss may<br />

include:<br />

Gradual thinning hair on top of head.<br />

This is the most common type of hair<br />

loss, affecting people as they age. In male<br />

pattern baldness, hair often begins to<br />

recede at the hairline on the forehead.<br />

Women typically have a broader thinning<br />

hair all over their head.<br />

Circular or patchy bald spots. Some<br />

men and women lose hair in circular<br />

or patchy bald spots on the scalp, beard<br />

or eyebrows. Your skin may become<br />

itchy or painful before the hair falls out.<br />

Sudden loosening of hair. A physical or<br />

emotional shock can start hair to loosen.<br />

Handfuls of hair may come out when<br />

combing or washing your hair or even<br />

after gentle tugging. This type of hair<br />

loss usually causes overall hair thinning<br />

but is temporary.<br />

Full-body hair loss. Some hair loss<br />

conditions and medical treatments, such<br />

as chemotherapy for cancer, can result<br />

in the loss of hair all over your body.<br />

The hair usually grows back.<br />

Patches of scaling that spread over the<br />

scalp. This is a sign of a ringworm. It<br />

may be accompanied by broken hair,<br />

redness, swelling and, at times, oozing.<br />


These are multiple causes of receding<br />

hairline or thinning hair in women and<br />

each condition are followed by their<br />

respective treatment.<br />


A very common cause of hair loss<br />

which is another term for male or<br />

female pattern baldness. Men tend<br />

to lose hair from the temples and<br />

center part of the head. In women,<br />

hair usually becomes thinner all over<br />

the head. If one has a family history<br />

of male and female pattern baldness,<br />

chances are high you have too.It is<br />

more likely to happen as a person<br />

ages but can start at any point after<br />

puberty. Many females who experience<br />

androgenetic alopecia develop it after<br />

going through the menopause. This<br />

means that hormones may have<br />

something to do with hair loss in<br />

women.<br />

Treatment:<br />

It is possible to treat this condition<br />

with a medication for hair growth,<br />

namely minoxidil twice every day.<br />


Telogen Effluvium causes more hair to<br />

fall out, sometimes in handfuls, this is<br />

an estate where the hair remains in the<br />

natural shedding phase of the growth<br />

cycle. Usually, telogen effluvium is<br />

a temporary form that resolves over<br />

time, such as, surgery and childbirth.<br />

It is advisable to see a doctor to find<br />

out the cause.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 209


“This psychological toll affected the woman more that men, obviously. Female pattern hair<br />

loss may lead to depression, anxiety, and social phobia.”<br />

Treatment:<br />

A doctor will need to treat any underlying<br />

causes of telogen effluvium. If a physician<br />

suspects that specific medications are<br />

causing hair loss at any form, they may<br />

change them.<br />


Anagen Effluvium causes large amounts<br />

of hair to fall out rapidly during the<br />

growth phase of the hair cycle. The<br />

condition may cause hair to fall out<br />

from the head, as well as from other<br />

parts of the body, including eyebrows<br />

and eyelashes, just like chemotherapy<br />

treatment.<br />

Treatment:<br />

Treatment for this condition depends<br />

on the cause but can include a topical<br />

solution of minoxidil. If a person has<br />

anagen effluvium as a result of undergoing<br />

chemotherapy, cooling the scalp during<br />

the procedure may help. Hair will often<br />

grow back 3–6 months after stopping<br />

chemotherapy.<br />


Alopecia areata is an autoimmune<br />

condition that causes hair to fall out<br />

suddenly. The immune system attacks<br />

hair follicles, along with other healthy<br />

parts of the body. Hair from the scalp,<br />

as well as eyebrows and eyelashes, may<br />

fall out in small chunks.<br />

Treatment:<br />

If a person has this state of being, they<br />

should see a physician. A doctor may<br />

prescribe medication to help the hair<br />

grow back.<br />


A receding hairline due to hairs being<br />

pulled back into tight hairstyles. Traction<br />

alopecia causes it to break and come loose.<br />

Include:<br />

Tight buns or ponytails<br />

Braids<br />

If traction alopecia continues, a person<br />

may develop bald spots and thinning<br />

of the hair.<br />

Treatment:<br />

In terms of self-care, avoiding tight<br />

hairstyles will usually prevent further<br />

damage.<br />


Some medications have side effects that<br />

can start hair to fall out. Examples of<br />

such medications include:<br />

blood thinners, such as warfarin<br />

Accutane, to treat acne<br />

antidepressants, including Prozac and<br />

Zoloft<br />

beta-blockers<br />

cholesterol-lowering drugs, such as Lopid<br />

Treatment:<br />

If a person thinks hair loss may be due<br />

to a medication they are taking, they<br />

should consider seeing a physician for<br />

an assessment. The doctor might be<br />

able to reduce the dosage or switch the<br />

person to a different medication.<br />


Frontal fibrosing alopecia typically occurs<br />

in a receding hairline pattern and may<br />

also result in hair loss in the eyebrows<br />

and underarms. Frontal fibrosing alopecia<br />

most commonly affects post menopausal<br />

women.<br />

Treatment:<br />

Certain medications can manage<br />

symptoms and stop the progression<br />

of the disease. The cause is unknown.<br />

Birth control pills<br />

Hair loss while using birth control<br />

pills may be a bad experience to some<br />

people. Others might suffer hair loss<br />

several weeks or months after they<br />

stop taking them. If people are taking<br />

birth control pills, they can choose one<br />

that has a low androgen index. This<br />

may help to lower the risk of hair loss.<br />

Other forms of birth control that give<br />

hormonal changes, such as implants and<br />

skin patches, may also cause hair loss.<br />

Treatment:<br />

The American Hair Loss Association<br />

recommends that people who have an<br />

increased risk of genetic hair loss opt for<br />

a non-hormonal type of birth control.<br />


Ringworm is a fungal infection that can<br />

start hair loss. Ringworm on the scalp,<br />

or tinea capitis, can cause temporary<br />

bald areas on the head, its symptoms<br />

include: itchy, red patches of skin, small<br />

spots that get bigger and many more.<br />

Treatment:<br />

If ringworm does not heal by itself,<br />

then a doctor may prescribe an<br />

antifungal medicine. Alternatively,<br />

they may prescribe an antibiotic, such<br />

as Griseofulvin.<br />


(PCOS)<br />

A condition that affects a woman’s<br />

hormone levels. Women with PCOS<br />

210 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


212 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



{ SCALP NY }<br />

“Female pattern hair loss (FPHL) typically presents as a diffuse thinning of the hair across<br />

the entire head.”<br />

produce higher-than-normal amounts of<br />

male hormones. This hormone imbalance<br />

causes them to skip menstrual periods<br />

and makes it harder for them to get<br />

pregnant. Its symptoms include hair<br />

loss, depression, and acne. Its risk factors<br />

infertility, diabetes, and obesity.<br />

Treatment:<br />

There is no cure for PCOS, but you can<br />

manage the symptoms of PCOS with<br />

the help of your physician.<br />


There are a lot of ways to regrow<br />

hairlines from scalp massages to taking<br />

supplements, and eating a healthy diet.<br />

Here are the best and advance methods<br />

of the doesn’t require much patience:<br />

Hairline lowering/advance procedure<br />

The hairline lowering/advancement<br />

procedure is performed by your surgeon<br />

making a trichophytic incision along the<br />

natural hairline and then carefully moving<br />

the scalp forward and downwards on<br />

the forehead. The hair-bearing tissue is<br />

then moved forward and sutured into<br />

its new lower position. After suturing,<br />

the individual hair follicles may also be<br />

transplanted to fill in gaps and to ensure<br />

that the hairline is natural.<br />


The use of hair transplantation also<br />

works to normalize the shape of the<br />

new hairline and also to minimize<br />

the appearance of any scarring as hair<br />

growth manifests through and over the<br />

incision line. In most cases, after the<br />

hair transplants surgery, there are only a<br />

very minimal, barely visible scars at the<br />

hairline. This scar will eventually fade<br />

to become nearly invisible over time.<br />


Here’s one we hadn’t heard of before.<br />

Platelet-rich plasma injections (PRP) have<br />

been used in other fields of medicine<br />

for over a decade but have only reached<br />

dermatology within the last five years.<br />

Simply put, Blood is extracted from<br />

the person with hair loss and ‘growth<br />

factors’ are extracted from the blood,<br />

then injected back into the scalp in the<br />

area where hair loss is occurring.<br />


During the scalp micropigmentation<br />

process (SMP), specialists apply an ink<br />

to a balding area with microneedles,<br />

which create micro impressions to<br />

give the illusion of hair. The ink helps<br />

replicate the appearance of thicker hair<br />

and each formula is mixed to match a<br />

person’s natural hair color as much as<br />

possible. The best people to ask, how<br />

scalp micropigmentation help hair loss<br />

is the Scalp International Hairlines, for<br />

they are the best professional to choose<br />

for your receding hairline problem and,<br />

every client that is treated will not leave<br />

the final session of treatment without<br />

being 100% satisfied – guaranteed!<br />


In male pattern hair loss (MPHL), the<br />

hair loss typically presents itself as either<br />

a receding front hairline, loss of hair<br />

on the crown (vertex) of the head, or a<br />

combination of both. Female pattern<br />

hair loss (FPHL) typically presents as<br />

a diffuse thinning of the hair across the<br />

entire head.<br />

Either way, there is no doubt that hair<br />

loss or even receding hairline affects<br />

both men and women’s psyche. This<br />

psychological toll affected the woman<br />

more that men, obviously. Female pattern<br />

hair loss may lead to depression, anxiety,<br />

and social phobia.<br />

For more information about Scalp<br />

International Hairlines and how we<br />

can help both men and woman with<br />

hairloss, please visit our website www.<br />

scalpny.com.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 213

214 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />











2851 MILTON AVE SOLVAY, NY 13209<br />

(800) 236-6792<br />


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 215


216 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />





Let’s talk about eyebrows. The<br />

eyebrows main function is to prevent<br />

sweat, water, and other debris from<br />

falling down into the eye socket but<br />

they are also important to human<br />

connection and facial expression.<br />

Another function of eyebrows is to<br />

prevent moisture from flowing into<br />

the eye. Of course, so that we do<br />

not get chemicals into the eye that<br />

doesn’t belong there. In the beauty<br />

industry, the eyebrows are a huge<br />

part of the whole look! It is common<br />

for people to modify their eyebrows<br />

by means of hair removal<br />

and makeup.<br />

Fashion in eyebrow<br />

shape continues to<br />

change throughout the<br />

ages and eyebrows have<br />

always featured heavily<br />

in fashion often a part of<br />

cultural demands made<br />

on women about body<br />

hair. Did you know that<br />

eyebrows in different<br />

cultures and decades symbolized<br />

someone’s power? Japanese women<br />

and men from the eighth century<br />

practiced a look called “hikimayu”<br />

where shaving or plucking of the<br />

eyebrow hair was in and painting<br />

smudge like brows higher on the<br />

forehead happened. This practice is<br />

comparable to an era where women<br />

who shaved their eyebrows were<br />

symbolized as high class women.<br />

Starting in the 1970s are when doctors<br />

started injecting patients with botox<br />

to raise the brow instead of having<br />

them naturally sag as we age. Now<br />

during the 21st century, injections<br />

are the most popular trend as well as<br />

plastic surgery to prevent the look of<br />

aging, and stay looking younger! Who<br />

doesn’t want to stay looking young?<br />

I certainly would love to look young<br />

forever. Another few trends in the<br />

skincare and beauty industry today, to<br />

keep up a clean look with brows are<br />

now brow lamination, brow tinting,<br />

and microblading. Some people even<br />

permanently tattoo their eyebrows<br />

as a way to permanently achieve and<br />

maintain the color and shape. What<br />

are eyebrow lamination, brow tinting,<br />

and microblading? Eyebrow lamination<br />

is a relatively new procedure that<br />

focuses on creating shiny, smooth,<br />

and natural brows. Brow Lamination<br />

is also known as an eyebrow perm<br />

just like lash lifting is known as an<br />

eyelash perm. This service is great for<br />

people who want a more clean and<br />

shiny look to their brows. For people<br />

who have very messy brows, or thin<br />

brows and need more of a uniform<br />

look, this is great to schedule for<br />

yourself. Unlike microblading, needles<br />

and coloring are not involved unless<br />

you add a tint which is a temporary<br />

dye added to the brows that last up to<br />

eight weeks depending on the brand.<br />

Brow Lamination is temporary and<br />

lasts up to six weeks.<br />

The process of microblading, also<br />

called cosmetic tattooing, involves an<br />

eyebrow technician to use a machine to<br />

create small precise cuts that match the<br />

strokes of hair naturally. Microblading<br />

does involve needles, and goes down<br />

one to two layers underneath the skin,<br />

which is why it is not permanent.<br />

A permanent tattoo lasts forever<br />

because it goes much deeper into the<br />

layers of the skin. The brand that I<br />

use to microblade<br />

my clients lasts 1-2<br />

years.<br />

Microshading<br />

is a part of the<br />

microblading<br />

process where a<br />

tattooing technique<br />

occurs in which<br />

a small handheld<br />

tool made of several<br />

tiny needles is used<br />

to add semi-permanent pigment to the<br />

skin. Microblading itself is a tiny blade<br />

used to create similar texture brow<br />

strokes to add more hairs, definition,<br />

and shape. You might be asking, “well<br />

since it is a tattoo...does it hurt?” I<br />

apply a numbing cream on for ten<br />

minutes before starting the actual<br />

service which creates no pain. It is<br />

more of a sensation where you don’t<br />

feel much but you hear a sound that<br />

clients might not like. Microblading<br />

and Microshading is definitely worth<br />

the money for how long they last<br />

and the fact that you do not need<br />

to fill them in as much anymore!<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 217


“Did you know that eyebrows in different cultures and decades symbolized someone’s power?”<br />

There is a pre and post process for<br />

each microblading/shading service<br />

that you need to prepare yourself for<br />

which will be included during the<br />

consultation. Microblading isn’t only<br />

reserved for thin, sparse brows even<br />

if you’ve been blessed with naturally<br />

full ones, microblading can enhance<br />

what’s already there. But the results<br />

are especially remarkable on those<br />

with thin brows (and can be nearly<br />

life-changing for people who suffer<br />

from alopecia or cancer).<br />

Last but not least there is eyebrow<br />

tinting which is the application of<br />

a semi permanent eyebrow dye to<br />

enhance, shape, and more so define<br />

the brows. This service is great for<br />

anyone. The more you learn, the<br />

more questions you might have and<br />

the more interested you become in<br />

trying one of these amazing services.<br />

Well, you can. Contact and book<br />

with BeautifyMe today and you<br />

will get a discount off of your first<br />

service! Contact BeautifyMe so we<br />

can Beautify you.<br />

Instagram: @beautifyme247<br />

Email: gfrose12@gmail.com<br />

218 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 219

220 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



}<br />



The relationship we have with<br />

money is a direct reflection of the<br />

relationship we have with ourselves.<br />

Being Unapologetically Authentic<br />

means valuing your time and energy.<br />

As we gain a higher value for ourselves,<br />

we become much more particular<br />

about what we spend our time and<br />

energy on. Everything in our life is a<br />

domino effect of the value we place<br />

on our time. It took me years to gain<br />

a strong, healthy relationship within<br />

myself. I would work extremely hard to<br />

spend my money<br />

on frivolous things,<br />

with no concern<br />

of saving or my<br />

credit.<br />

In my last column,<br />

I discussed the<br />

types of unhealthy<br />

relationships I had<br />

in my life, these<br />

behaviors being a<br />

direct reflection of<br />

the lack of value<br />

I placed on my<br />

time. Along your<br />

journey of becoming Unapologetically<br />

Authentic, you will begin to realize<br />

that certain people, places, and things<br />

are not worth your time. I cannot<br />

possibly value my time if I spend it<br />

around people who drain my energy<br />

or just do not simply add value to<br />

my life.<br />

Value comes in many forms, such as<br />

spiritual, emotional, mental, physical,<br />

and financial. I choose not to watch<br />

much television, as I feel it is not a<br />

good time spent. We all must do<br />

things that bring us peace, for some<br />

people, that is a television, and that<br />

is perfectly fine. Once I began to<br />

gain control of my life, I had to dig<br />

myself out of a hole. I was in debt, I<br />

had no savings, and I lost everything<br />

due to my work injury and poor<br />

choices. My credit score was in the<br />

400 range.<br />

Until this time, I never cared about my<br />

credit. I slowly started working to pay<br />

off debt and build my credit. In just<br />

one year, I was able to raise my credit<br />

score to over 700 points. I was able<br />

to accomplish this by changing the<br />

way I viewed money. Once I looked<br />

at how much I valued my time, I<br />

had to make a direct connection to<br />

how I spent my money. This allowed<br />

me to know the difference between<br />

spending my money and investing it. I<br />

began investing time and money into<br />

paying off debt, starting a business,<br />

mentoring, advertising, books/reading,<br />

classes, and more.<br />

With the learned and applied<br />

knowledge, my time became even<br />

more valuable. I do work a full-time<br />

job that is currently helping me grow<br />

my business until I can comfortably<br />

leap into full-time entrepreneurship.<br />

I had to correlate my time and what<br />

I find acceptable to be paid for my<br />

time and not settle for anything less.<br />

The goal is to consistently increase<br />

the value of my time by expanding<br />

my knowledge and skills. I am 38<br />

years old, I was never taught to value<br />

myself, let alone my time or money.<br />

However, it is never<br />

too late to turn<br />

your life around.<br />

I do not want my<br />

son to get caught in<br />

the cycle of living<br />

in debt. Statistics<br />

say that 80% of<br />

Americans live in<br />

debt. If I do not<br />

break the chains,<br />

the process will<br />

continue.<br />

You do not have to<br />

make an excessive<br />

amount of money to build wealth. You<br />

must have a good relationship with<br />

money and genuinely value your time.<br />

I will always be a work in progress,<br />

I just purchased containers and<br />

food for meal prep to save time and<br />

money when life gets busy, it’s easy<br />

to grab food on the go. Food is one<br />

is the most significant expenses per<br />

household, that about doubles when<br />

eating out often. Consistent small<br />

changes equal big results.<br />

I recently joined the YMCA. This is


“Being Unapologetically Authentic means valuing our time and energy. As we gain a<br />

higher value for self, we become much more particular as to what we spend out time and<br />

energy on.”<br />

an investment into the health and<br />

overall well-being of my son and me.<br />

Some people say investing in certain<br />

things is too expensive, but if you take<br />

a good look at what you truly spend<br />

your money on and adjust according<br />

to placing value on your time, you<br />

will see that you can afford much<br />

more than you think. If it does not<br />

help me grow and add value to my<br />

life, I do not have time for it.<br />

I am too busy growing, glowing, and<br />

living Unapologetically Authentic!<br />

222 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 223


{ I AM... }<br />

I AM A WOMAN<br />



Women are fearless. Women are brave.<br />

Women are courageous. Women are<br />

superheroes. Women can wipe their<br />

tears with one hand and conquer<br />

the world with the other. Women<br />

are the matriarch of their family. A<br />

woman doesn’t have to say anything<br />

to hear her strength. A woman’s<br />

characteristics can be loud and clear<br />

by simply being a woman. Without<br />

women, how would the world exist?<br />


When you talk about history be sure<br />

to mention the part that some of<br />

the most influential change-makers<br />

were women. Looking back on where<br />

women started and where they are<br />

today leaves me in amazement thinking<br />

about all the phenomenal attributes<br />

the women in the past must have<br />

possessed to make such a change.<br />

Women went from not being able<br />

to: vote, be in political office, run a<br />

business, have a voice, get a credit card<br />

in our name, no paid maternity leave,<br />

take legal action against workplace<br />

sexual harassment, and the list<br />

continues.<br />

Fast forward to now, women are<br />

able to do all of the above and more.<br />

Today’s change allowed women to<br />

be Physicians, vote, run their own<br />

business, have a voice, First Vice<br />

President Kamala Harris in office, first<br />

woman’s NFL official, Photographers,<br />

Realtors, women with credit cards their<br />

name and property in their name.<br />

Do you understand your privilege?<br />


Women weren’t recognized beyond<br />

the stereotypical role of society. A<br />

women’s role was to cook, clean,<br />

and be a caregiver. Women were<br />

undervalued and unnoticed. Women<br />

were penalized for being a woman.<br />

Men didn’t need to obtain a title<br />

or document of ownership to have<br />

possession over women. Being a<br />

woman gave consent to inequality.<br />

How is this fair? Can you imagine<br />

the hurt and disappointment women<br />

experienced during this time?<br />



Beyond March<br />

Celebrating women does not begin<br />

or end in March. Celebrating women<br />

deserves a lifestyle. We must let go<br />

of our very own biases to continue<br />

celebrating all women by addressing<br />

and acknowledging our unhealthy<br />

conditioned behaviors to demand<br />

cultural change. Understand your<br />

privilege, continue to bring awareness<br />

to the achievements of women because<br />

what we have become accustomed<br />

to; would not exist if it wasn’t for<br />

the women who fought for equality.

226 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 227

{ I AM... }<br />

“Women are fearless. Women are brave. Women are courageous. Women are superheroes.”<br />

We are paving the way for the next<br />

generation.<br />


A FIGHT... HOLD ON...<br />

As Helen Reddy said, “I am woman,<br />

hear me roar, oh yes, I am wise but<br />

it’s wisdom born of pain yes, I paid<br />

the price, but look at how much I<br />

gained.” Our right was given with a<br />

fight, let’s make the fight meaningful<br />

by continuing to break barriers.<br />

International Women’s day celebrates<br />

EQUALITY!! We cannot celebrate<br />

the change in inequality if we do<br />

not change our perception. Equality<br />

is celebrating beyond the color of<br />

our skin, friendships, and our very<br />

own biases. Equality is diversity and<br />

inclusion!<br />


Women empowerment is beyond<br />

empowering the women within your<br />

circle. Women empowerment is no<br />

discrimination. I don’t need to know<br />

you to empower you. You shouldn’t<br />

need to know me or anyone else to<br />

empower them. This is mindset.<br />



We are now in positions to empower<br />

one another, what will you do with<br />

your power? What will you do with<br />

your voice? What will you do to<br />

celebrate women’s equality outside<br />

of your race, social, and economic<br />

norms?<br />

I envision a world of International<br />

women shamelessly exemplifying<br />

diversity, inclusion, and empowerment<br />

celebrating beyond the color of our<br />

skin & comfort zone. It’s demonstrated<br />

we have endless opportunities because<br />

we are:<br />




WE ARE BOLD!<br />










Let’s continue to celebrate social,<br />

economic, political, & CULTURAL<br />

achievements.<br />

Happy International Women’s Month!!<br />

Here’s to US!!!<br />

IG: I_am_shameless_shawny<br />

FB: Shawny Cox-Ashford<br />

Stay YOU, Stay TRUE, Stay SHAMELESS<br />

Own it, embrace it, Face it Shamelessly<br />

~ Shameless Shawny


{<br />

{<br />



WITH<br />


KRISTIN } B.<br />

}<br />

}<br />





I’m standing in front of my closet<br />

panicked!<br />

What to wear?<br />

What to pack?<br />

How to style hair and make-up?<br />

I start to try on clothes. It quickly<br />

becomes overwhelming and time<br />

consuming, I’m not loving any of the<br />

looks. My favorite dress doesn’t fit. That<br />

pair of pants that fits perfect needs to be<br />

dry cleaned. The button came off that<br />

pretty blouse a year ago and still needs<br />

mending. I sift through a mountain<br />

of clothes and then consider perhaps<br />

I should buy totally new outfits.<br />

I decide to go work on something<br />

else and procrastinate this photoshoot<br />

preperation for later.<br />

Fast forward to the day of the<br />

photoshoot. I show up frazzled and<br />

unprepared and worse yet, I’m running<br />

late. End up picking out clothes last<br />

minute, the morning of the shoot and<br />

everything is disjointed.<br />

This ever happen to you? Can you relate?<br />

Today I show up relaxed and happy.<br />

But back then, I had no strategy around<br />

planning, preparing and packing for<br />

photoshoots.<br />

Hundreds of photoshoots later,<br />

I’ve developed a strategy and clear<br />

preparation plan and share with you<br />

here my step-by-step process. If one<br />

tip transforms how prepared you feel<br />

leading up to your next photoshoot,<br />

then my heart will sing.<br />

Let’s say, a photoshoot or life event<br />

you want to capture is coming up.<br />

This can be any type of photoshoot:<br />

engagement, maternity, wedding,<br />

graduation, holiday family photos,<br />

actor headshots, updating portfolio<br />

for your modeling agent, images for a<br />

re-branded business website, imagery<br />

for social media content.<br />

STEP #1: Get clear on the intention<br />

of the photoshoot:<br />

Getting clear on the purpose of the<br />

shoot and how the photos will be used,<br />

I’ve found truly helps with being happy<br />

with the outcome. Also it is helpful in<br />

determining what photographer to<br />

hire, what to wear and how to plan<br />

the shoot.<br />

Consider your goals for the shoot.<br />

Write out the goals down.<br />

Think about how the images will be<br />

used: online, websites, social media,<br />

e-commerce or actual tangible photos<br />

such as hanging on a wall, sending<br />

prints to family, cards, keepsakes for<br />

yourself or someone special, an album,<br />

or printed headshots.<br />

STEP #2: Research photographers:<br />

You wouldn’t call a podiatrist with<br />

questions about heart health, right?<br />

Photographers are the same way. Most<br />

photographers have a specialty or a<br />

few specialties.<br />

When researching photographers<br />

look carefully at their recent work<br />

and portfolio on their website,<br />

Instagram and/or Facebook. Look for<br />

a photographer who specializes in the<br />

type and style of photos you are seeking.<br />

Planning a wedding? Research wedding<br />

photographers. New baby? Infant and<br />

family photographer. Getting started<br />

as a commercial actor, a photographer<br />

whose niche is commercial acting<br />

headshots.<br />

I often see people disappointed when<br />

they hire someone for something outside<br />

of their niche or area of expertise.<br />

As a model and talent coach, I frequently<br />

see aspiring models or actors shoot<br />

with someone who does not specialize<br />

in the type of photos that are actually<br />

needed to be taken seriously by agents<br />

or that would get them booked on paid<br />

assignments. Finding a photographer<br />

who is an expert in their niche will get<br />

you leaps and bounds ahead and make<br />

you look like a million bucks.<br />

Have a conversation with the<br />

photographer and ask questions.<br />

• Discuss what will be included for the<br />

price point quoted?<br />

• Is editing included?<br />

• For how many images?<br />

• How are images delivered?<br />

• When will they be delivered?<br />

• Who provides make-up and hair?<br />

• Does the photographer direct you<br />

with moving and posing?<br />

• Do they assist with wardrobe?<br />

• How long is the shoot?<br />

• Inside or outside (on location)?<br />

STEP #3: Who is responsible for what<br />

on shoot day?


“Hundreds of photoshoots later, I’ve developed a strategy and clear preparation plan and<br />

share with you here my step-by-step process.”<br />

After talking things through with the<br />

photographer, I like to make a list of<br />

what I’ll be responsible for on shoot day.<br />

I recommend outlining what needs to<br />

be done and approximately how long<br />

it will take to accomplish each task.<br />

For example, if purchasing a new outfit<br />

is necessary, think about the time it takes<br />

to shop, and when you’ll do that, be it<br />

virtually or in person. Consider when<br />

the items will arrive by and if they don’t<br />

fit or don’t work for the look you’re<br />

going for, what is the plan B?<br />

Think about other errands that might<br />

need to be done prior to a photoshoot,<br />

such as mani/pedi, waxing, setting up<br />

childcare, blocking off time in schedule<br />

for shopping, taking the shoot day off<br />

from work or getting a haircut.<br />

STEP #4: Preparing for photoshoot day:<br />

Make a list and check it twice!<br />

Make your own list or grab my FREE<br />

“Photoshoot Prep Checklist”<br />

Having a packing checklist makes<br />

preparing for photoshoots stress free!<br />

Grab my free checklist by visiting:<br />

https://linktr.ee/kristinbauergross<br />

STEP #5: Show up feeling your best:<br />

On the day of a photoshoot nothing<br />

can replace feeling refreshed, confident<br />

and prepared.<br />

• Pack the night prior – or sooner<br />

• Eat a healthy early meal the night before<br />

a photoshoot that is low in sodium and<br />

sugar. Sodium, sugar, alcohol or late<br />

night meals leave us feeling bloated,<br />

heavy, tired, swollen and lethargic the<br />

next day.<br />

• Bring water and pack snacks<br />

• If the shoot is outside think about<br />

the weather: sunscreen, umbrella, or<br />

winter gear<br />

• Try on all the clothes you bring. Yes<br />

try on everything.<br />

• I repeat, try on everything. This helps,<br />

knowing exactly what fits and what<br />

doesn’t and to attend to any mending<br />

or clothes that need to be cleaned or<br />

pressed.<br />

• Trying all wardrobe on also allows us<br />

to get to know which items work with<br />

what accessories, undergarments, socks<br />

and shoes. Sometimes we “think” we<br />

know what something will look like but<br />

once we arrive and realize oh wow the<br />

only bra packed looks all wrong with<br />

the blouse that was planned. Having<br />

tried on all wardrobe would alleviate<br />

these snafu’s.<br />

STEP #6: SHOOT DAY<br />

Have fun! All the hard work is done.<br />

When a shoot day arrives I try to focus<br />

on being present, in the moment and<br />

enjoying myself as much as possible.<br />

• Allow plenty of extra time for<br />

traffic, delays, bad weather, or other<br />

unforeseeable problems while traveling<br />

to the photoshoot location.<br />

• Being prepped early allows you to not<br />

arrive in a panic and instead enjoy every<br />

minute of your photoshoot<br />

• How the subject feels shows through on<br />

camera. If you feel relaxed and happy this<br />

is how the final photos will be reflected,<br />

if you are unprepared, arrive late, didn’t<br />

eat breakfast, missed your morning<br />

coffee, or whatever other mishap this<br />

too will show in the subject’s face.<br />

Make prepping for your next photoshoot<br />

a breeze with my free checklist!<br />

Snag the free photoshoot prep checklist<br />

here:<br />

https://linktr.ee/kristinbauergross<br />

Enjoy this article? Love to connect on<br />

Instagram.<br />

Follow<br />

@KristinBauerGross<br />

@KristinBCoaching<br />

232 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 233

234 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



MARKETING IN <strong>2021</strong><br />


Spring signifies a renewal, new<br />

beginnings and growth. As we move<br />

into the next season of <strong>2021</strong>, Voices<br />

For Impact podcast is dropping new<br />

episodes that center around this<br />

‘rebirth’ theme. The ladies behind<br />

EmPowered Nutrition and Always<br />

Chasing Better Coaching share<br />

empowerment tips and advice on<br />

living your best life in two of the<br />

new episodes to hit the podcast.<br />

I don’t know about you but January<br />

and February are the hardest months<br />

of the year for me to get through<br />

each year. The cloudy and short<br />

wintery days make life a bit more<br />

of a struggle but as soon as March<br />

hits — I am revitalized and the<br />

hope and excitement for the future<br />

kicks in. This could also be because<br />

March is also my birthday month.<br />

The first day of Spring (March 20)<br />

to be exact! My birthday always<br />

feels extra special because it is the<br />

first day of Spring. I feel like I am<br />

being reborn into a new year and<br />

a new season all at once. This year<br />

in particular, I feel this sense of<br />

excitement for a new beginning more<br />

than years past. Especially since last<br />

year, around March 20th was the<br />

when the pandemic hit America<br />

and so began the beginning of a<br />

shut down… but it does not do to<br />

dwell on the past, I think collectively<br />

we are all looking forward to this<br />

new year.<br />

Are you the type of person always<br />

looking to improve themselves? A<br />

life-long learner? Do you look for<br />

inspiration and motivation on how<br />

to begin the self-love journey? Do<br />

you want to start your own business<br />

but do not know where to begin?<br />

I am so excited to share all new<br />

episodes of Voices For Impact this<br />

year. At the start of <strong>2021</strong>, Voices For<br />

Impact has already dropped some<br />

episodes with incredibly talented<br />

guests that are sharing their stories<br />

and advice, just for you.<br />

Spring is a great time to harness the<br />

energy of the season and allow your<br />

mindset to move away from dreary<br />

winter doldrums into the fresh new<br />

energy of spring. Life moves quickly,<br />

but spring can be a reminder that<br />

there’s always time to start a new<br />

beginning on our goals, plans, and<br />

dreams. The transitions between the<br />

seasons offer a great metaphor with<br />

which to view our lives, incredible<br />

change moves at a slow pace but<br />

with patience and persistence, our<br />

efforts will allow us to live the lives<br />

we seek.<br />

I hope you feel motivated to take on<br />

the day after reading this article and<br />

for more daily inspiration listen to<br />

Voices For Impact on Apple, Spotify,<br />

and iHeart Radio podcast platforms.<br />

Subscribe and stay connected on<br />

Instagram, Facebook, YouTube and<br />

LinkedIn @VoicesForImpact.<br />

DID YOU KNOW? Podcasts are<br />

really effective at selling, spreading<br />

awareness, and building good<br />

reputations for companies. It’s an<br />

intimate medium where listeners<br />

develop real relationships with hosts,<br />

so when hosts recommend products<br />

in their own voices, audiences are<br />

more likely to try their product.<br />

Voices For Impact has attractive<br />

demographics for advertisers, with<br />

listeners that are more of an affluent,<br />

educated consumer than average,<br />

according to Edison Research. My<br />

current list of sponsors include JAB<br />

Online Services, Kefi Marketing,<br />

EmPowered Nutrition, among others.<br />

Email voices4impactcuse@gmail.<br />

com if you would like to get your<br />

message out to a new audience by<br />

sponsoring an episode or sharing<br />

your story to help encourage people<br />

to find their passion and purpose.<br />

Danielle is a Nazareth College alum<br />

and is currently pursuing her MBA.<br />

Currently she works as the Senior<br />

Director of Development for a local<br />

nonprofit. In addition, she volunteers<br />

for several organizations in the<br />

community and is a Board Member<br />

for Association for Fundraising<br />

Professionals and a Central New<br />

York Business Journal’s 40 Under<br />

Forty honoree.


“Spring signifies a renewal, new beginnings and growth. As we move into the next season<br />

of <strong>2021</strong>, Voices For Impact podcast is dropping new episodes that center around this<br />

‘rebirth’ theme.”<br />

236 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>





Revolutionary innovation has always<br />

been a key part of what makes Animal<br />

Care Sanctuary special. As one of<br />

the first no-kill shelters in the nation<br />

when we were founded over 50 years<br />

ago, being on the cutting edge of new<br />

ideas to save more lives is a part of<br />

our roots.<br />

We’ve carried that with us over the<br />

years by working hard to be<br />

on that forefront. Nearly 10<br />

years ago, we launched our<br />

own low cost community<br />

veterinary clinic, which<br />

has been a vital part of our<br />

operations and still relatively<br />

uncommon for an animal<br />

shelter. Additionally, our<br />

pre-vet intern program is<br />

one of extremely few in the<br />

country.<br />

And now, we’re looking to<br />

be on the cutting edge to<br />

save more lives once again.<br />

Over the last couple of years,<br />

our cattery began looking at<br />

FIV and FeLV positive cats<br />

more closely. FIV (feline<br />

immunodeficiency virus)<br />

and FeLV (feline leukemia<br />

virus) are similar retroviruses<br />

that only affect cats. In years past, a<br />

cat that tested positive for either of<br />

these viruses was essentially euthanized<br />

automatically – partly because many<br />

shelters generally don’t have the<br />

space to quarantine sick felines with<br />

contagious viruses. These viruses affect<br />

a feline’s immune system, making it<br />

easier for them to get sick – at least<br />

theoretically.<br />

Fortunately, ACS had the space in<br />

our then-recently renovated cattery, so<br />

we started taking in these supposedly<br />

ill cats and housing them in their<br />

own area. However, after months of<br />

caring for these cats, not only did our<br />

staff notice that the felines seemed<br />

perfectly healthy, they showed no<br />

symptoms of any illness at all.<br />

So we slowly started looking for<br />

adopters for these cats. Being as<br />

transparent with potential adopters as<br />

possible, we informed them honestly<br />

about their conditions – that the cat<br />

tested positive for FIV or FeLV and<br />

what that means. But because of the<br />

stigma surrounding these viruses,<br />

finding homes for these otherwise<br />

extremely sweet and adoptable felines<br />

was proving difficult.<br />

But more is being learned around<br />

the country about these viruses. And<br />

the biggest takeaway is how little is<br />

actually known about the viruses. A<br />

recent research article published by<br />

the Humane Society of the United<br />

States helped us confirm what we<br />

were already learning: that these<br />

viruses are not necessarily<br />

deadly, not exceptionally<br />

contagious, and infected cats<br />

are capable of living long,<br />

happy lives. In fact, even<br />

the testing process itself is<br />

not reliable in diagnosing<br />

these viruses.<br />

Armed with this new<br />

information, we’re setting<br />

out to battle the stigma<br />

that FIV and FeLV cats are<br />

deathly ill and unadoptable.<br />

In fact, the three FeLV<br />

felines that we’ve had up<br />

for adoption for months,<br />

have all found homes in<br />

February, including 10-yearold<br />

Pawdme and sevenyear-old<br />

Lando, the latter<br />

of which was with us since<br />

August of last year and even<br />

spent time as our office cat.<br />

So if you’re out looking for a new<br />

feline friend and come across a cat<br />

that is FIV or FeLV positive, don’t<br />

pass them by. In our experience, FIV<br />

and FeLV kitties have been some of<br />

the sweetest felines that have come<br />

through our doors. Give them a<br />

chance.<br />

238 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 239

{ THE ACS CORNER }<br />

“As one of the first no-kill shelters in the nation when we were founded over 50 years ago,<br />

being on the cutting edge of new ideas to save more lives is a part of our roots.”

242 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />






If you’ve been exercising for a<br />

substantial amount of time, you know<br />

and value the importance of your<br />

routine. Have you given much thought<br />

to your recovery and rest? Many<br />

people think that the “work” is in<br />

the workout. And while<br />

that is true, the real<br />

growth and building of<br />

strength is in your rest<br />

and recovery time. If<br />

you haven’t built<br />

in enough time for<br />

recovery, you may<br />

end up burned out or<br />

injured. This is because<br />

your body isn’t getting<br />

adequate time to repair<br />

itself.<br />

Strength building is<br />

a repetitive process<br />

of breaking down<br />

muscles, and repairing<br />

them. Tiny micro tears<br />

occur, which is normal<br />

and healthy in building<br />

muscle. When balanced<br />

with sufficient time to<br />

rest and recover, the<br />

muscles then rebuild<br />

themselves to a stronger<br />

version of what they<br />

once were.<br />

So how much rest and recovery do<br />

you need? This may vary from one<br />

individual to the next. If we are<br />

discussing sleep, adults need an average<br />

of 7-8 hours per night. Athletes<br />

might need a little bit more. If we are<br />

talking about rest days, that depends<br />

on the person, their routine, their<br />

age, etc. 1-3 rest days per week is<br />

generally a good rule. This rest day<br />

might be a complete day of rest. For<br />

some people, it might include foam<br />

rolling. Others may benefit from a<br />

relaxing walk, gentle stretching, or<br />

yoga.<br />

For longtime athletes who are in a<br />

vigorous program, a complete week<br />

off once every 3-5 weeks might be<br />

necessary. For me personally, I greatly<br />

benefit from this. I usually spend<br />

this week doing plenty of yoga and<br />

Pilates. After my week off, I can<br />

return to my usual routine feeling<br />

excited and strong.<br />

What are the key signs that a rest<br />

recovery period are needed? Here<br />

are some signs:<br />

- an elevated resting heart rate.<br />

- difficulty sleeping.<br />

- feeling burned out,<br />

unmotivated (especially<br />

if this isn’t normal for<br />

you).<br />

- nagging muscle fatigue<br />

and soreness.<br />

Get in tune with your<br />

body and check in every<br />

once in awhile. Knowing<br />

what is normal for you<br />

will help you get the most<br />

out of your routine, while<br />

avoiding injury. This will<br />

set you up for long term<br />

success. And no, a week<br />

or two off will not derail<br />

your efforts. Stay well!<br />

Alexis Tearney Kuhl<br />

owns and operates<br />

Tearney’s Martial Arts.<br />

Since Covid-19, she<br />

has pivoted her karate<br />

and kickboxing classes to an online<br />

virtual format.<br />

She teaches both adults and children<br />

(ages 5 and up). Together with her<br />

husband Jordan, Alexis also owns the<br />

online vintage store Lhük Vintage. You<br />

can follow her in Instagram @<br />

alexistearneykuhl.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 243

FOR<br />

ANN<br />

SAVE TH<br />





E DATE<br />

ER 26, <strong>2021</strong><br />

THE<br />

UAL<br />





246 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />




TO SEX<br />


For many women, and men, sex with<br />

a partner is less about exhileration<br />

and more about intimacy, partnership,<br />

role fulfillment, and perhaps even<br />

reducing anxiety about how they<br />

think they are supposed to want sex.<br />

Contrary to popular belief, these<br />

are PERFECTLY NORMAL ways<br />

of thinking about sex. Some may<br />

consider themselves to be demisexual<br />

(a sexual orientation in which one<br />

is attracted to only those to whom<br />

one feels close), or having responsive<br />

desire (feeling desire after feeling<br />

sexually aroused), and some may<br />

even identify as asexual (a sexual<br />

orientation in which people feel little<br />

or no attraction to others).<br />

Many people like all the “extras” from<br />

sex: closeness, intimacy, relaxation,<br />

release, security, comfort, relational<br />

satisfaction, and feeling good about<br />

nurturing and caring for their partner.<br />

If all goes well, a sexual experience that<br />

starts out from a place of willingness<br />

rather than wanting may end up with<br />

that sexual kick of sensation— but it<br />

is like the cherry on a sundae or extra<br />

pepperoni on pizza - it’s an option<br />

one might enjoy (perhaps really, really<br />

enjoy) but not the reason for sitting<br />

down to eat.<br />

You may have been taught that having<br />

an orgasm is the best thing in the<br />

universe. Or, that if you don’t crave<br />

sex, you are not normal. Maybe things<br />

started out the other way— you<br />

could not keep your hands out of<br />

your partner’s pants (or your own).<br />

Sex was exciting and desireable.<br />

You felt satisfied and you satisfied<br />

your partner. But now you feel like<br />

a rotary dial phone, a VHS player,<br />

a dried flower.<br />

You may be the person in a relationship<br />

who feels like this, or you may be in a<br />

relationship with someone who feels<br />

like this. Some “want to want” sex.<br />

Some are desperate to feel wanted.<br />

Some may be old enough to know<br />

the Cheap Trick song “I want you<br />

to want me” and believe this is the<br />

ONLY way to be in a relationship:<br />

everyone feeling equally wanted.<br />

I call this the “Tyranny of Reciprocity”.<br />

This is the idea that unless the balance<br />

is perfectly even at any given moment,<br />

the relationship is unfair or inadequate.<br />

When it comes to sex this manifests as:<br />

“I had an orgasm. Now you need one<br />

too.” Or “you had an orgasm, now I<br />

get one.” Or, “I wanted sex/initiated<br />

sex last time, now its your turn.”<br />

Let’s compare it to other domestic<br />

activities: Do your bodies sleep the<br />

same number of hours? If you had<br />

4 scoops of ice cream and I’m full<br />

after one, do I need to eat 3 more?<br />

I just sneezed and I feel great, now<br />

it’s your turn?<br />

Many couples have what we call<br />

“discrepant desire”— one partner<br />

wants more sex and the other wants<br />

less (or, at least, they want to not<br />

feel bad about wanting less.) Some<br />

couples feel that they get along in<br />

every way except sex. They try to<br />

be happy with this lack of sexual<br />

contact but they want more. This<br />

is common. For many couples, sex<br />

is like a vitamin: you need a certain<br />

amount for the relationship to be<br />

healthy and even if neither of you<br />

wants to take that vitamin, its still<br />

good for both of you in the long<br />

run. In a recent large study of the<br />

factors that contribute to relational<br />

satisfaction, sexual satisfaction was<br />

rated as one of the most influential.<br />

Some strategies people take to address<br />

this:<br />

● Compromise: Jane want sex 4<br />

times a month, Alex wants sex just 1<br />

time a month at a maximum, so they<br />

will try for every other week. (Hint,<br />

not going to work well). Unwanted<br />

sex is unwanted sex whether its with<br />

a husband, a wife, a stranger or a<br />

politician.<br />

● Give up on sex together and try<br />

other partners: This requires lots of<br />

conversation and consent and for<br />

some folks it might just work but<br />

for others it breaks what most people<br />

consider the primary agreement of a<br />

long term relationship— the two of<br />

us together forever. Feeling pushed<br />

into an agreement like this is rarely<br />

helpful.<br />

● Give up on sex altogether: Some<br />

couples will navigate a sexless marriage<br />

well, but many will find that sex is a<br />

key ‘vitamin’ and without it all the<br />

love, compassion, and emotional<br />

intimacy is not enough. All couples,<br />

no matter their age or health status,<br />

can create sex worth having. (A quick<br />

medical note especially for women:<br />

sex should never hurt. If sex is painful,<br />

medical interventions are available.)<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 247


“People looking to enhance their sexual relationships need skills, tasks, a mental attitude,<br />

and practice to have more satisfying sex (please note: we are not aiming for “more sex” — we<br />

are going for more satisfying sex.)”<br />

) ● Bully and demand your partner<br />

have more sex because that is<br />

the unspoken expectation of the<br />

relationship/marriage agreement:<br />

this never works. Meaning, while<br />

there may be sex, this is not the way<br />

to feel closer, get more intimate,<br />

or have each party be satisfied. If<br />

the goal is to make just one person<br />

happy, this may make for a peaceful<br />

kingdom. However, somewhere in<br />

there is pain and dissatisfaction, if<br />

not worse— trauma.<br />

There is hope and a better way. At the<br />

Rochester Center for Sexual Wellness<br />

(and other clinics around North<br />

America) there is a new therapy called<br />

Optimal Sexual Experience Groups.<br />

This is a research proven method<br />

for couples with desire discrepancy<br />

or with low/no sex relationships to<br />

improve their sexual relationship. The<br />

Optimal Sexual Experience method<br />

recognizes that everyone is OK just<br />

the way they are. People looking to<br />

enhance their sexual relationships<br />

need skills, tasks, a mental attitude,<br />

and practice to have more satisfying<br />

sex (please note: we are not aiming<br />

for “more sex” — we are going for<br />

more satisfying sex.) Bad sex leads to<br />

a mental attitude of expecting bad<br />

sex which — no surprise — leads<br />

to bad sex.<br />

“Great lovers are made not born.”<br />

Great lovers are similar to great<br />

chefs who learn through dedication,<br />

training, trial and error, and the<br />

addition of their own special sauce.<br />

Some people ARE born with a flair<br />

for flavors — but no great chefs are<br />

made without devoting significant<br />

time and dedication to the practice.<br />

What if you were able to interview<br />

people who felt that they had amazing,<br />

intimate sex and figure out how they<br />

did that? What if you could unleash a<br />

team of researchers to identify exactly<br />

what these folks had in common:<br />

how they talked about sex, felt about<br />

their bodies, experienced in their<br />

bodies, minds, and spirit, what skills<br />

they had, what they thought about<br />

during sex?<br />

Well, this study has been done and<br />

the findings are different from what<br />

you might expect. In Magnificent<br />

Sex, Peggy Kleinplatz and A. Dana<br />

Menard, along with their research<br />

team, decode the components,<br />

facilitators, and pathways to optimal<br />

sexual experiences for couples. Dr.<br />

Kleinplatz has trained teams of group<br />

leaders all over North America to<br />

deliver a carefully crafted group<br />

treatment. At the Rochester Center<br />

for Sexual Wellness, we are honored<br />

to be a part of this ongoing research<br />

into enhancing sexual relationships by<br />

offering Optimal Sexual Experiences<br />

Groups. The 8 session group for<br />

couples is private, confidential, and<br />

includes education, discussion, and<br />

instructions for homeplay. Rochester<br />

Center for Sexual Wellness’ first series<br />

of groups, led by Mr. Rosen and Dr.<br />

Kranz, concluded in December 2020,<br />

with great success. The 6 couples in<br />

the group emerged with new direction<br />

and hope for enhancing their sexual<br />

relationships. The next session is<br />

forming now, are you ready for more<br />

satisfying sex in your relationship?<br />

If you are interested in learning<br />

more about Optimal Sexual<br />

Experiences groups at the Rochester<br />

Center for Sexual Wellness,<br />

please visit our website at www.<br />

rochestercenterforsexualwellness.com<br />

or call (585) 865-3584 to arrange for<br />

an initial assessment to find out if the<br />

groups are right for you. You can find<br />

more information about the Optimal<br />

Sexual Experiences research team and<br />

other pairs of trained therapists at<br />

www.optimalsexualexperiences.com.<br />

Daniel Rosen is a licensed clinical<br />

social worker and an AASECT certified<br />

sex therapist. He is the Behavioral<br />

Medicine Director at the Rochester<br />

Center for Sexual Wellness where he<br />

sees individuals, couples, and provides<br />

group therapy as well as supervising<br />

sex therapists in training on their<br />

way to AASECT certification. He is<br />

a lifelong Rochesterian who nurtures<br />

plants, builds things, and is continually<br />

learning to play the guitar..<br />

248 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


250 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />





Vicarious means to feel how someone<br />

else is feeling through our imaginations.<br />

In Sanskirt the word Muditā “means joy;<br />

especially sympathetic or vicarious joy, or<br />

the pleasure that comes from delighting<br />

in other people’s well-being” as defined<br />

by Wikipedia.<br />

As I was meandering along my life I was<br />

reflecting upon recent joys of people<br />

around me. On Friday, one of the students<br />

I counsel, with the assistance of her<br />

school counselor, applied for college. The<br />

background of this student is rough stuff.<br />

Tons of trauma, hardship, and hurdles to<br />

overcome. You would not know this if<br />

you met her. She comes to school every<br />

day with a smile on her face, does her<br />

work, and gives it her all. A few years<br />

ago she was not sure she would see this<br />

day as she had been suicidal. Her joy,<br />

her Sukha, was pure and heartfelt in this<br />

moment. I felt it and celebrated with her.<br />

“We’re stronger when we cheer each other<br />

one.” Serena Williams<br />

There have been times in my life, too<br />

many, where I did not fully embrace or<br />

experience someone else’s joy. Perhaps<br />

it was because they were experiencing<br />

something I wanted and my unhealthy<br />

envy kicked in, I did not feel they deserved<br />

whatever goodness was occurring (which<br />

reflected my insecurities and ego) or other<br />

reasons I did not totally understand.<br />

What I do know is as I worked on myself,<br />

became more whole and in love with<br />

who I am, I could celebrate someone<br />

else’s joy completely. Even when there<br />

were times I was feeling some envy or<br />

ego, I would cheer the other person on<br />

will all of my gusto. To my surprise, when<br />

I moved beyond my negative feelings<br />

to celebrate someone else, I felt better,<br />

happier, confident.<br />

“How you make others feel about themselves<br />

says a lot about you.” Kushandwizdom<br />

Lately I have been reading “Think Like<br />

A Monk” by Jay Shetty. In one part He<br />

talks about “Reverse Internal Energy”,<br />

how envy, and “Schadenfreude” which<br />

means “taking pleasure in the suffering<br />

of others”. Jay says “When we derive<br />

joy from other people’s failure, we’re<br />

building our houses and pride on the<br />

rocky foundation of someone else’s<br />

imperfection or bad luck.” Think of it<br />

this way as Jay states it “The more we<br />

define ourselves in relation to the people<br />

around us, the more lost we are.”<br />

You know what happens when you<br />

celebrate the joys and accomplishments of<br />

others? It is freeing, beautiful, connecting.<br />

Just imagine if we all began to acknowledge<br />

and support the joy of others with no<br />

negativity? We could have “joy flash<br />

mobs” where we are joyous because of<br />

the accomplishments of someone else.<br />

“When we seek to discover the best in<br />

others, we somehow bring out the best in<br />

ourselves.” William Arthur Ward<br />

Too often in our “comparison culture”<br />

today we rank ourselves by comparing<br />

to others. Relationships, grades, jobs,<br />

vacations, clothes, cars, homes and more.<br />

Guess what? This way of thinking is<br />

destructive to us. Our envy feelings<br />

don’t build us up. They bring us down.<br />

A Psychology Today article states “Envy<br />

has to do with feeling unhappy about<br />

the success of someone else, or about<br />

what they have and, at the same time,<br />

secretly feeling inferior yourself. Instead of<br />

finding success for yourself or improving<br />

yourself, you may be envious and want<br />

what another person has or find yourself<br />

wishing that the other person would<br />

lose that quality or possession in order<br />

to make things seem fair.”<br />

The way to feel better about ourselves<br />

will always be doing the work to like,<br />

and love, ourselves. To combat the voices<br />

of negativity in our heads with ones of<br />

strength and capability. Build on our<br />

confidence and strength. To work towards<br />

what we want to accomplish. To give a<br />

big WAHOO to celebrate the joys of<br />

others. When we expand our joyousness<br />

to beyond ourselves by feeling our Muditā<br />

for others, joy radiates into a world where<br />

more joy needs to be celebrated.<br />

We are not born with low sense of self<br />

and lack of confidence. How life comes<br />

at us, and how we are impacted by life<br />

events, affects us. The great news is we<br />

can change how we feel about ourselves.<br />

An article in Zen Habits states “I strongly<br />

believe that you can do things to increase<br />

your self-confidence. It is not genetic<br />

and you do NOT need to be reliant on<br />

others to increase your self-confidence.<br />

And if you believe that you are not very<br />

competent, not very smart, not very<br />

attractive, etc…that can be changed.”<br />

We all have the power and ability to<br />

change what we believe to be our truth<br />

if we are willing to do the work. We are<br />

worth the work.<br />

You and all of your amazing skills and<br />

talents matter. Let’s Muditā for others<br />

and create flash mobs of joy. Celebrate<br />

each other with gusto. To view others<br />

achievements as inspirations, because if<br />

they can accomplishment something it<br />

means you can too. To see the success of<br />

others as a moment in time to be joyous.<br />

That is the type of world I envision for<br />

all of us.<br />

May your Muditā be with you.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 251

252 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />





When was the last time you danced<br />

in the rain? Although it may sound<br />

a bit cliché - have you ever danced<br />

in the rain? Thrown caution to the<br />

wind? With April coming up and<br />

bringing showers, this could be your<br />

perfect opportunity!<br />

Most of us may see the rain as<br />

depressing. A grayness that envelopes<br />

us. A longing to see the sun and feel<br />

its warmth to re-energize us.<br />

We need and crave the sun, no doubt.<br />

But without our April showers, there<br />

could be no May flowers. Touché,<br />

right? Yes - without the rain, there<br />

is no true appreciation for the sun.<br />

So, instead of longing for what is<br />

coming. Embrace the now, knowing<br />

it will make the latter - that much<br />

sweeter! No one ever said we could<br />

not enjoy both sides of a yin and<br />

yang situation.<br />

Yin and yang, yet another cliché<br />

saying? Or is it? Is it, as the definition<br />

for cliché goes, a phrase that is overused<br />

and betrays a lack of original thought?<br />

I think not, for when you look at<br />

what yin and yang represent, it is far<br />

from not being original! It is a concept<br />

of opposites that complement each<br />

other. In this case, take our April<br />

showers that will complement our<br />

May flowers.<br />

No fooling, dancing in the rain can<br />

give you just as much enjoyment<br />

as skipping in the sun. Speaking of<br />

fooling, I’d be remiss in acknowledging<br />

another thing April is well known<br />

for... April Fool’s Day! April 1st is,<br />

of course, April Fool’s Day! A perfect<br />

excuse for tomfoolery, but what is it?<br />

Or should I say, who is it? The origin<br />

of tomfoolery seems to come from a<br />

man named Thomas Skelton. Around<br />

1600, he was a jester or a fool for the<br />

Pennington family at the Muncaster<br />

Castle in Britain. He was known<br />

as Tom Fool. It is said he was even<br />

possibly the model for the jester in<br />

William Shakespeare’s play, King<br />

Lear of 1606.<br />

Unfortunately, it seems he wasn’t a<br />

very pleasant man! Tales of him sitting<br />

under a tree by the side of the road<br />

with weary travelers asking him for<br />

directions. Depending on whether he<br />

liked you, he would either tell you<br />

one way or send you on a treacherous<br />

way to the marshes!<br />

Even though that origin seems to be<br />

the most well-known, Tom Fool is<br />

actually centuries older! He started<br />

appearing around in the 1300s as<br />

Thomas Fatuus. The first part, Thomas,<br />

a common name like what we use<br />

today with Tom, Dick or Harry. The<br />

Fatuus part means stupid or foolish.<br />

And yet, how could any of this possibly<br />

tie into our April Fool’s Day? Surely,<br />

April’s Fool Day is a fairly modern-day<br />

made-up celebration? Actually no, it’s<br />

not! Although its exact origins remain<br />

a mystery, some historians speculate<br />

it dates back to 1582. This was when<br />

France switched from a Julian calendar<br />

to the Gregorian calendar.<br />

People who were slow to get the<br />

news continued to celebrate the New<br />

Year during the last week of March<br />

to April 1st. They quickly became<br />

the butt of jokes and pranks for not<br />

knowing the calendar had changed.<br />

One prank was to put paper fish on<br />

their backs, for it meant they were<br />

“easily hooked” or as we may know<br />

as a “gullible” person.<br />

In 1700, English pranksters began<br />

popularizing it by playing practical<br />

jokes on each other. By the 18th<br />

century it had spread. In Scotland,<br />

it became a two-day event, starting<br />

with “hunting the gowk”. Gowk is a<br />

word for cuckoo bird or a symbol for<br />

the Fool. The first day, people were<br />

sent on phony errands. The next day,<br />

Tailie Day, involved pranks played by<br />

pinning fake tails on people’s backside.<br />

I suppose you could say a pre-cursor<br />

to the modern-day version we know<br />

as “kick me” signs!<br />

So, there you have it, the history<br />

of April Fool’s Day. But what is the<br />

future of April Fool’s Day? Some<br />

may think it’s not a good holiday<br />

to take part in. That it can be mean<br />

and even lead to bullying. And yet,<br />

isn’t something - what we make of it?<br />

My point is, of course, April Fool’s<br />

Day should NOT be about being<br />

mean or humiliating. Instead, it<br />

should be a fun day! I think the safest<br />

and most fun way of participating<br />

in April Fool’s Day is to not simply<br />

target one person. A day to make<br />

your co-workers and family smile.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 253


“We need and crave the sun, no doubt. But without our April showers, there could be no<br />

May flowers. Touché, right? “<br />

When planning a prank, always think<br />

about how you would like it if it was<br />

done to you. Would you laugh it off and<br />

enjoy it, or is it something you would<br />

take to heart and may upset you?<br />

Doesn’t have to be mean, it simply is a<br />

day to have fun and smile. Saying April<br />

Fool’s afterwards may seem foolish to<br />

say, but I guarantee<br />

you it brings a smile<br />

and reminiscence of<br />

when we were kids<br />

trying to fool ole<br />

mom and dad.<br />

Even one of my<br />

favorite writers,<br />

Mark Twain, said,<br />

“The first of April<br />

is the day we<br />

remember what we<br />

are the other 364<br />

days.” There you go,<br />

a perfect example.<br />

Sometimes laughing<br />

at ourselves is the<br />

best joke! Sure, old<br />

holidays may not be<br />

what we want for<br />

this day and age, but<br />

we can make them<br />

what we want.<br />

So, what’s it going to be this year<br />

for you? To be the fool or to play a<br />

fool? Whichever the case, it’s all in<br />

good fun!<br />

And now this brings us to our five<br />

random National April Holidays. A<br />

couple of days to put us in the mood<br />

for the month coming up:<br />

254 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />

April 3rd - National Find A Rainbow<br />

Day - What better way to celebrate<br />

Spring than while dancing in the rain<br />

and look for our rainbow. Some of you<br />

may roll your eyes at the thought but<br />

seriously do you want to go through<br />

life never being able to say you danced<br />

in the rain? That you did not search<br />

for rainbows? Doesn’t matter what<br />

your age is, this is obtainable - go<br />

out and do it!<br />

April 12th - National Big Wind<br />

Day - Maybe a good day to go fly a<br />

kite? Yet another thing that has no<br />

age restriction. This is more fun than<br />

you may realize. Pack up and go to<br />

the park. Soar your kite high in the<br />

sky and soon your troubles will float<br />

away too.<br />

April 14th - National Look Up At<br />

The Sky Day - So yes, we definitely<br />

have a theme going on here. Whether<br />

it’s dancing in the rain, looking for<br />

rainbows, flying kites on a blustery day<br />

or simply staring up and making shapes<br />

out of the clouds. April suddenly<br />

becomes more than just a rainy month!<br />

April 24th - Arbor<br />

Day. Arbor Day is<br />

a special day that is<br />

set aside throughout<br />

the world to raise<br />

awareness of trees<br />

and the important<br />

role that they play<br />

in our environment.<br />

All fooling aside,<br />

we need to do our<br />

part so that the<br />

joke won’t be on<br />

our future! Do your<br />

part - go plant a tree<br />

or find an event that<br />

encourages this day<br />

to be celebrated!<br />

April 30th -<br />

National Honesty<br />

Day. Seriously, how<br />

funny is this? April<br />

you start out as a fool only to end<br />

up honest, you are a wild and crazy<br />


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 255


}<br />




Perimenopause is referred to as the final<br />

cessation of your menstrual cycle and<br />

the time in which you will start the<br />

journey of menopause and menopausal<br />

symptoms. Mood swings, hot flashes,<br />

weight gain and vaginal dryness are just<br />

a few of the signs that you are heading<br />

towards the big change.<br />

Perimenopause is a different journey<br />

for every woman, but on average, it<br />

takes about a year to complete if you<br />

are heading into menopause naturally<br />

(not medically forced). The average age<br />

occurs between 45-55, after which time<br />

you are postmenopausal.<br />

Common signs and symptoms of<br />

perimenopausal include the following:<br />

• Missed Periods<br />

• Hot Flashes<br />

• Weight Gain<br />

• Sleep Deprivation<br />

• Mood Swings<br />

• Sore Breasts<br />

• Chronic Headaches<br />

• Night Sweats<br />

• Memory Problems<br />

• Changes to skin and hair (pH balance<br />

changes)<br />

• Incontinence<br />

As if these symptoms are not enough,<br />

there are a few others that I really want<br />

to focus on.<br />

Vaginal Dryness is an unfortunate<br />

and uncomfortable early warning sign<br />

of menopause. Estrogen is needed to<br />

keep moisture in the skin, hair, eyes<br />

and vagina. Vaginal dryness can cause<br />

uncomfortable and painful sex but<br />

can also lead to other issues such as<br />

vaginal atrophy, which is when there is<br />

thinning of the tissue and even shorting<br />

and tightening of the vaginal canal. It is<br />

important to deal with vaginal dryness<br />

right away. Sex should not be painful<br />

and there are options available to make<br />

sure it never is.<br />

Primary care doctors or gynecologist<br />

may prescribe a type of gel, prescription<br />

medication or a vaginal ring to help with<br />

dryness. Hormone replacement therapy<br />

(HRT) is another option but not all<br />

women can or want to add hormones<br />

back into their body. There are organic<br />

solutions available and it is important to<br />

do your research about those products.<br />

In The Pink moisture drops and intimate<br />

massage oils are estrogen free but work<br />

amazing at putting the moisture back<br />

into the vagina.<br />

Chronic Urinary Tract Infections (UTIs)<br />

are a type of bladder issue that can<br />

affect women in perimenopause. UTI<br />

symptoms include urinating more<br />

frequently which can be painful, dark, or<br />

bloody. Hormone changes are the culprit<br />

to frequent UTIs during menopause.<br />

These changes can cause vaginal bacteria<br />

to change, which increases your risk of<br />

not only getting a bladder infection but<br />

also experiencing them on a chronic basis.<br />

Studies show that menopausal women<br />

tend to have a higher pH measurement,<br />

which can lead to the risk of developing<br />

UTIs. A UTI does not cause a higher<br />

vaginal pH but having a high pH can<br />

increase a person’s risk of developing a<br />

UTI. Reduced estrogen levels during<br />

perimenopause and menopause can<br />

put a person at risk of developing more<br />

infections. In The Pink’s vaginal moisture<br />

drops are designed to provide moisture<br />

which in return helps to keep the pH<br />

in balance.<br />

Decreased Sex Drive can be a symptom<br />

of perimenopause. Studies show that as<br />

women head towards the big change they<br />

often feel one of two extremes. Some feel<br />

sexually liberated now that they are no<br />

longer able to get pregnant, while others<br />

may become self-consciousness and<br />

feel undesirable. The sudden hormone<br />

changes can often lead to feelings of<br />

depression and anxiety as well. For<br />

women it often takes both physical<br />

and mental stimulation. If she is in a<br />

depressed state or lacking self-confidence<br />

because of menopause it can be difficult<br />

for her to become aroused.<br />

Experiencing vaginal dryness and<br />

tender breast can also have an impact<br />

on sexual desires. The idea of pain and<br />

not enjoyment from sex can keep a<br />

woman from being turned on and ready<br />

to go. Hip Hemp’s intimate massage oils<br />

are a great organic solution to vaginal<br />

dryness and pain during intercourse.<br />

With only a few ingredients these plantbased<br />

lubricants are estrogen free and<br />

packed with antioxidants and nutrients.<br />

Although these products are not designed<br />

to increase sex drive, a side effect from<br />

feeling more lubricated and not in<br />

pain can help bring back the desire to<br />

be intimate.<br />

Changes to Skin and Hair are a common<br />

side effect heading into menopause. The<br />

lack of estrogen will soon cause a loss<br />

to fatty tissue and collagen which will<br />

make skin drier and thinner and will<br />

affect the elasticity and lubrication of<br />

256 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


}<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 257


“Mood swings, hot flashes, weight gain and vaginal dryness are just a few of the signs that<br />

you are heading towards the big change.”<br />

the skin near your vagina and urinary<br />

tract. Hair can become brittle and may<br />

even start to fall out. During this time<br />

skin may be more prone to developing<br />

wrinkles as well as acne blemishes and<br />

eczema flare-ups.<br />

Hip Hemp’s In The Pink intimate<br />

massage oils are great to be used from<br />

head to toe and as a lubricant. Hemp<br />

Seed Oil is used as the base or the<br />

carrying oil of these massage oils. This<br />

anti-inflammatory, detoxifying oil and<br />

analgesic properties closely match skins<br />

lipids. Hemp Seed Oil is packed full of<br />

Omega 3 and Linoleic Acids which has<br />

been proven to help with skin elasticity.<br />

The essential oils that are added to the<br />

base oil offers their own benefits of<br />

moisturizing and calming along with<br />

many other satisfying results.<br />

Hip Hemp’s line of In The Pink products<br />

are all estrogen free, organic, and free of<br />

soy, nuts, dairy, fillers, gluten, chemicals<br />

or GMO’s. It is always important to speak<br />

with your doctor about any questions<br />

or concerns related to your health. It is<br />

also a good idea to keep track of your<br />

symptoms you may experience when<br />

you start the journey of menopause<br />

and make sure to communicate those<br />

with doctor as well. There are options<br />

available to help feel comfortable and<br />

confident during this journey of life.



} }<br />

262 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


} }<br />


Tell us about your business. What<br />

product or service do you provide and<br />

who is your target audience?<br />

My main business is called The Purple<br />

Painted Lady and it is a paint boutique.<br />

In other words, I own a paint shop that<br />

offers products along with support,<br />

advice and workshops. We have sold a<br />

couple of special high-end furniture and<br />

cabinetry paint lines for over 12 years<br />

here in western NY. We like to have fun.<br />

Life is short, so why not enjoy being<br />

at work! My target audience<br />

is anyone who has a piece of<br />

furniture that needs a facelift, or<br />

those who look at their kitchen<br />

cabinets and wish they could<br />

change their look. I can help<br />

these people make their home<br />

look beautiful, but on a budget.<br />

The Purple Painted Lady’s main<br />

store is in Macedon, NY. We<br />

have a showroom, and we also<br />

ship all online sales orders daily.<br />

We also have a second location<br />

of a satellite spot at the Shops<br />

on West Ridge in Greece. We<br />

sell online and, between our<br />

website and social media, have<br />

around 2,000,000 unique visitors<br />

monthly. I have a few products<br />

that are private labeled through our<br />

business also such as brushes. The<br />

Purple Painted Lady has taken on a<br />

life of its own. I play a role in it, but<br />

truly - I am part of a team of some<br />

amazing women that make it what it<br />

is, and I am very grateful....and lucky to<br />

have them because The Purple Painted<br />

Lady would not be what it is without<br />

all of us. My husband Steve is a key<br />

part of some of the technical support<br />

and all of the emotional support he<br />

gives. At The Purple Painted Lady we<br />

sell cabinet and furniture paint, host<br />

workshops and try to provide the best<br />

customer service possible. We carry<br />

a few fantastic paint lines, but it all<br />

started because of Chalk Paint® by Annie<br />

Sloan. It is a flat paint that adheres to<br />

virtually any surface without sanding or<br />

priming. Once painted and dried, we<br />

use a furniture wax or brush on top coat<br />

to seal it. I found this product about<br />

12 years ago and was so blown away<br />

with it after using, I quit my day job<br />

to open a shop...and the rest if history.<br />

Our target audience is anyone who wants<br />

to unify a room by painting a piece<br />

of furniture or is in need of updating<br />

their cabinets in their bath or kitchen.<br />

Besides having our shops - I am the<br />

promoter of the annual market called<br />

The Purple Painted Lady Festival. We<br />

host that the third weekend of September<br />

and have around 350 artist and vendors<br />

from architectural salvage, upcycled<br />

items and painted furniture. It attracts<br />

around 14,000 people and is a lot of fun!<br />

And then lastly- I am in the process of<br />

opening a wedding/event venue focused<br />

on agritourism in Wayne County. It is<br />

called Fig Hollow Barn and we hope<br />

to be formally launched by late <strong>2021</strong>.<br />

When did the<br />

entrepreneur bug bite you?<br />

I have always been a<br />

fan of small businesses.<br />

Most of my careers since<br />

graduating college were for<br />

small businesses. I love the<br />

excitement of it - the ups<br />

and downs, the way to make<br />

it grow in unlimited ways<br />

compared to a traditional<br />

job where you work for<br />

someone else and need to<br />

get approval. Honestly,<br />

most of the businesses I have<br />

worked at in my past were<br />

more conservative. I have<br />

always had ideas on how to<br />

make a business better...now I<br />

get to have fun making things happen.<br />

How did you come up with the<br />

name “The Purple Painted Lady”?<br />

I remember when I started out after<br />

my daughter was born in 2005 - it was<br />

initially painting murals. It is funny<br />

how you start in one direction and<br />

then, things have a way of taking on a<br />

life of their own. But anyway- I needed<br />

a business name and I had wanted<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 263

264 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 265


“My main business is called The Purple Painted Lady and it is a paint boutique...<br />

in other words, I own a paint shop that offers products along with support, advice and<br />

workshops.”<br />

The Painted Lady because I live in this<br />

beautiful, colorful Victorian farmhouse<br />

and painted murals in the beginning.<br />

The previous owners of our home were<br />

fun and when we had moved in back in<br />

2003, it was already painted in shades of<br />

periwinkle and then - from a different<br />

angle, I paint for a living. However, the<br />

url was already taken. So, one late night<br />

around midnight my husband and I<br />

were just brainstorming names and<br />

he threw out, “The Purple Painted<br />

Lady.” At first, I wasn’t in love with<br />

it but now, I could not imagine the<br />

business be anything else. It is also<br />

a great name because if you Google<br />

it we are the only business with<br />

that name. Maybe that is because<br />

I ultimately trademarked it, or also<br />

because it is unique. A pretty big<br />

thing when starting a business is to<br />

make sure you choose a name that<br />

there are not already 1000 of.<br />

Are You Happy in what you do<br />

And What Would You Change if<br />

anything?<br />

I live, breathe and dream my business.<br />

Am I happy? Well, I know I may be<br />

a bit insane and sometimes I have a<br />

“love/hate” ralationship with it and<br />

it does get overwhelming. I find for<br />

me, my businesses become like another<br />

child in my life. But yes, I truly love<br />

what I do and there is not one thing I<br />

would change.<br />

Please tell us what being a business<br />

owner means to you and why you<br />

became an entrepreneur in the first<br />

place?<br />

Being a business owner for me is freedom.<br />

I had been in roles working for others<br />

throughout my life and have had ideas,<br />

but working for someone else, there was<br />

not total freedom to create, or to take<br />

chances. Being I am my own boss, the<br />

sky is the limit. Not one idea is too crazy<br />

for me to try if I believe in it. I love<br />

how also, being a business owner allows<br />

me to meet so many different people,<br />

to collaborate with other businesses,<br />

and also support them in helping make<br />

their dreams come true. I do quite a bit<br />

of coaching to other artists and small<br />

businesses. I often think about that<br />

saying, “rising tides raise all ships.” It<br />

is 100% true. Building relationships<br />

with people and other businesses is so<br />

important. I believe that in this world,<br />

you get, what you give. It ultimately<br />

comes full circle.<br />

What or who has been your greatest<br />

influence in business and why?<br />

This is going to sound silly but one time<br />

I was watching a tv show called Flipping<br />

Out on Bravo which is all about this<br />

guy named Jeff Lewis who is a designer.<br />

Back in 2004, I remember watching this<br />

one specific episode where Jeff, who is<br />

the focus of the reality show was having<br />

lunch with his dad. His father said to<br />

him something like, “find a business<br />

where you can make money when<br />

you’re sleeping.” That saying made an<br />

impact on me and I have considered<br />

that in choices and navigating my<br />

business. Being part of the online<br />

sales world was something I decided<br />

to do since in <strong>2021</strong>.<br />

What would you say is your greatest<br />

professional accomplishment to date?<br />

Hmm, probably starting and<br />

coordinating our annual art festival and<br />

the way it allows us to help so many<br />

charities and volunteer organizations<br />

through it. Not to mention, creating<br />

a platform that brings people together<br />

with artists. And artist make this<br />

world a much better place to live in!<br />

What kind of person do you<br />

feel makes a successful female<br />

entrepreneur?<br />

This is just my opinion, but a person<br />

who has grit. A person who knows<br />

and believes above all other things, that<br />

their purpose is worthy and so are they<br />

and are willing to role up their sleeves<br />

and dig their heals in . Plus, work more<br />

hours than most people believe exist<br />

in a single day to make dreams into a<br />

reality. A person who is dedicated and<br />

understands that every decision they make<br />

should continuously direct them toward<br />

266 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 267

268 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />



“A pretty big thing when starting a business is to make sure you choose a name that there<br />

are not already 1000 of.”<br />

a goal. A person who understands, that<br />

every new encounter with a new person<br />

may be an opportunity. That sounds<br />

like I am embellishing, or writing for<br />

some Hallmark movie, but at the end of<br />

the day, if a person doesn’t have what it<br />

takes to stay on path and keep the pace<br />

for days, months and years on end they<br />

will drop off. I always tell my daughter,<br />

and anyone I am business coaching, that<br />

there is nothing between you and success<br />

except for yourself. Guaranteed there<br />

will be obstacles, set backs, and mistakes<br />

but perserverence, the ability to pivot,<br />

be open to changes and to learn from<br />

all of that will only help you.<br />

I know you created a festival that has<br />

grown substantially over the years.<br />

Tell us about it, and what you think<br />

has been the key to making it a success<br />

year after year.<br />

Keeping it fresh and focusing ultimately<br />

- on the customer service experience<br />

that guests will have when they attend.<br />

We have artist and vendor meetings<br />

through the summer just so we can<br />

convey how important the interaction<br />

with guests attending is. Our artists and<br />

vendors - I believe are the best of the<br />

best. I recruit the artists and believe I<br />

am pretty selective. I have always said<br />

that I want people to leave thinking to<br />

themselves they need to save the date<br />

for the following year because it was so<br />

good they do not want to miss it.<br />

What’s the best advice you have received<br />

in business that you wish to pass on<br />

to our readers?<br />

Yikes, hard to pick just one thing. I<br />

would say, believe in yourself and don’t<br />

over analyze making decisions! Start<br />

small, don’t get in debt to launch a<br />

business. Whatever you choose to do<br />

- be the best at it!<br />

What are the 5 top qualities of being<br />

a successful woman entrepreneur?<br />

Hmm, this is interesting. I think these<br />

qualities are important no matter who<br />

you are, but I would say, being driven<br />

is a must. You need to be willing to put<br />

in the many, many hours of hard work<br />

seven days a week to grow your business.<br />

You need to be flexible and resilient<br />

because change and setbacks are going<br />

to happen. Being a female business<br />

owner can be tough. Believe it or not,<br />

people can have prejudices.<br />

Being positive and grateful is extremely<br />

important.<br />

And depending on the line of business you<br />

are in, being outgoing and friendly. My<br />

business has grown due to relationships<br />

I have built with people that I have met<br />

through the years.<br />

What has been the most effective<br />

marketing initiatives or programs you<br />

have used to promote your business?<br />

Basic old, free social media. The internet<br />

is an amazing thing and has built my<br />

business to where it is today.<br />

What would you say are your strengths<br />

as an entrepreneur?<br />

I think my instincts and being able<br />

to make smart business decisions and<br />

see my future and the growth for my<br />

business and not being afraid to make<br />

it happen. I am a people person. I<br />

love meeting people and networking.<br />

And, I am a risk taker. I like to make<br />

things happen.<br />

What meet ups, local entrepreneur<br />

events, and accelerators do you<br />

recommend that have helped you grow?<br />

Bad question for me - I do not do any of<br />

this. I have found the best mentors for<br />

me are found outside of these types of<br />

groups. I look to other business owners<br />

that I feel have “made it” and who I<br />

respect. Those are the people I like to<br />

learn from. Sometimes, organizations<br />

and events become a bit showy. I want<br />

to get right to the meat and potatoes. If<br />

you have a business idea. Look around<br />

your community or your industry<br />

and find someone who is slaying and<br />

watch how they run it. There is always<br />

something to be learned.<br />

What one thing have you learned as a<br />

small business owner that has served<br />

you well over the years?<br />

So, my response is from the perspective<br />

of a small business owner. Personally,<br />

I have never over extend my credit. I<br />

always paid for everything at the time<br />

I purchased versus taking terms with<br />

another business. I do not ever like<br />

owing money and only grew my business<br />

when financially, I could do it myself.<br />

This theory can differ among people,<br />

but it has served me well.<br />

#Are there any resources or tools you’d<br />

like to share with other small business<br />

owners that have helped you run your<br />

business?<br />

If yes, please describe (and include links<br />

if available). Let me introduce you to<br />

Facebook. LOL My 16 year old daughter<br />

jokes that she remembers when I was<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 269


“I truly love what I do and there is not one thing I would change.”<br />

so excited for my business to hit 500<br />

followers. Now we are approaching<br />

70,000.<br />

Do you have any new projects coming<br />

up (or have you just completed a big<br />

project ~ reached a milestone, etc.)?<br />

If so, please tell us about it. Yes! I<br />

am starting a new<br />

business called Fig<br />

Hollow Barn. It<br />

is an old barn that<br />

we have renovated<br />

on 40 acres focused<br />

on agritourism here<br />

in NY and being a<br />

flexible event space.<br />

We will be hosting<br />

weddings in 2022<br />

and hosting various<br />

farmers markets. It<br />

is extremely exciting<br />

and so much fun<br />

launching this!<br />

What do you do<br />

for fun/relaxation?<br />

Making my dreams<br />

come true. Sorry,<br />

but that is true. But<br />

I also love to paint.<br />

I really love painting<br />

furniture! I love<br />

hosting gatherings<br />

and cookiing dinner<br />

at my home for<br />

friends and family.<br />

What do you do for encouragement<br />

or to be motivated ?<br />

I find networking with other business<br />

owners really encourages me and<br />

sparks a new fire. When I travel<br />

(or did travel prior to 2020- LOL)<br />

See a beautiful curated space is so<br />

inspirational!<br />

How do you balance your<br />

entreprenuer life with family/friends<br />

that don’t understand the challenges<br />

we experience? Honestly, I have<br />

weeded them out of my circle. Joking,<br />

not joking. But seriously, my business<br />

is my life. It is my heart. My small<br />

business is not a hobby. It supports<br />

my family and employs others and<br />

helps them support their families too.<br />

I find that my close circle of friends<br />

and family are very supportive. I<br />

am very grateful for them. If you<br />

have people in your life who are not,<br />

you might need to re-evaluate those<br />

relationship. (not joking)<br />

What is your Number One Business<br />

Goal you plan<br />

to accomplish<br />

in <strong>2021</strong>? To up<br />

my social media<br />

game.<br />

Is there anything<br />

else you’d like to<br />

share with our<br />

readers?<br />

Just that 2019 and<br />

2020 have been<br />

hard, difficult<br />

years for so many.<br />

Grant some grace<br />

to others and ....<br />

be as supportive as<br />

you can for your<br />

local businesses.<br />

Yes, Amazon is<br />

convenient and<br />

quick, but if<br />

possible and it<br />

makes sense, try<br />

to support some<br />

of the shops and<br />

restaurants in your<br />

community. They<br />

need you!<br />

270 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 271



274 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong><br />






In this article, I will come back to a<br />

health topic that affect many people,<br />

including many women. I would like to<br />

talk about insulin, insulin resistance and<br />

how to become the opposite of insulin<br />

resistance which is much healthier,<br />

becoming Insulin sensitive.<br />

You probably have heard about insulin<br />

when spoken in regards to diabetes,<br />

pre-diabetes, etc.<br />

But insulin is a very important hormone.<br />

It is released by the pancreas, one of the<br />

organs involved in digestion but also is<br />

responsible in releasing this important<br />

hormone that allows glucose (sugar) to<br />

enter cells which then reduces blood<br />

glucose (blood sugar).<br />

I will try to explain it in a simple way.<br />

This is how the process goes: when we<br />

consume carbohydrates or any food (for<br />

example rice, pasta, starchy vegetables,<br />

etc.) our bodies break down these foods<br />

into its simple forms: glucose, proteins,<br />

fats, etc. Most of the mentioned foods,<br />

are high in carbohydrates and hence will<br />

be broken down into high amount of<br />

glucose, which is a simple sugar used for<br />

energy in our bodies. There are other<br />

types of simple-one molecule sugars such<br />

as: fructose, galactose and ribose. Once<br />

we have broken down these foods into<br />

simple forms of sugar, insulin is released<br />

by the pancreas in response to those<br />

carbohydrates consumed. Insulin then<br />

acts as a train and take the broken down<br />

and digested glucose from the blood<br />

stream and transports it to the liver and<br />

stimulates the making of glucogen in<br />

the liver. Glycogen is a molecule that<br />

stores glucose in the liver. Think of it like<br />

a group of glucose stored, now called<br />

glycogen- like big sugar bags.<br />

In states of insulin resistance, the same<br />

amount of insulin does not have the<br />

same effect on glucose transport and<br />

blood sugar levels. Therefore, blood sugar<br />

levels may appear high. This is caused<br />

when bodies either do not release the<br />

same amount of insulin to take away<br />

the extra-glucose in the blood or the<br />

process is not efficient enough. There are<br />

many causes of insulin resistance. Some<br />

risk factors for insulin resistance include<br />

obesity, little or no physical activity, family<br />

history of diabetes, low vitamin D levels,<br />

various health conditions, and certain<br />

medications. But also, insulin resistance<br />

could be a precursor for a person to<br />

develop diabetes. Insulin resistance- or<br />

the inability of insulin do its function<br />

has been link to many conditions such as<br />

PCOS, hormonal imbalances in women,<br />

infertility, non-alcoholic fatty liver disease<br />

and may increase the risk of cardiovascular<br />

conditions, cancer, arthritis, Alzheimer<br />

and other neurodegenerative diseases and<br />

Autism. Therefore, it is our best interest<br />

to find out more about it and how to<br />

do the opposite. The opposite is to help<br />

our body so that insulin becomes very<br />

efficient in taking the extra glucose from<br />

our blood stream and this will decrease<br />

our risk of diabetes and may improve<br />

our hormone levels.<br />

First, let’s explore signs and symptoms<br />

of insulin resistance.<br />

1. If our fasting glucose (blood sugar<br />

before eating anything in the morning<br />

or after not eating for 12 hrs.) is over<br />

95 mg/dL<br />

2. If our A1C levels are over 6. These levels<br />

are measured through a laboratory test<br />

in the blood and measures the average<br />

sugar in the blood in the past 3 months.<br />

3. If waist circumference (measure<br />

around your body at the level of your<br />

belly buttom) is bigger than hip/buttocks<br />

circumference (this is the measurement<br />

around your hips at the largest/widest<br />

part).<br />

4. If you are constantly feeling tired and<br />

need coffee, energy or sugary drinks to<br />

stay awake and feeling with brain fog<br />

and difficulty concentrating.<br />

5. If you consume a diet high in refine<br />

carbs, or foods with high glycemic<br />

index such as: rice, pasta, potatoes,<br />

cereals, breads, etc. In addition, if you<br />

consume little amounts of Omega 3,<br />

found in fish, nuts or consume high<br />

amounts of alcohol or nitrates (found<br />

in salmi, bologna, cheeses etc)- this can<br />

be another pre-disposing factor.<br />

6. If you have taken for an extended<br />

period of time steroid medications, you<br />

may be more prone to develop insulin<br />

resistance.<br />

In summary, if you have one or several of<br />

those signs and symptoms and suspect<br />

you may be insulin resistance, you should<br />

consult with your medical doctor or health<br />

provider to further explore these signs.<br />

Meanwhile, you should also consider<br />

implementing these recommendations<br />

that will improve the insulin response<br />

and may help to decrease the blood<br />

sugar levels, improve your hormonal and<br />

energy levels, and overall quality of life.<br />

First of all, let’s consider sleeping.<br />

CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 275

{ LADIOLOGY }<br />

“You probably have heard about insulin when spoken in regards to diabetes, pre-diabetes,<br />

etc. But insulin is a very important hormone. ”<br />

Catching up with sleep will help insulin<br />

resistance, but meanwhile you work on<br />

getting your good nights of sleep, do<br />

not depend of caffeine. Instead, hydrate<br />

properly by first thing in the morning<br />

drink 12-16 onz. of water or “gel” water<br />

-soluble fibers (that is by juicing carrot<br />

juice, celery juice etc.) these will help<br />

with insulin response.<br />

Secondly consider adding a routine of<br />

regular exercise. When we exercise on<br />

regular basics this helps to move glucose to<br />

glycogen storage for energy and improve<br />

insulin sensitivity and response. According<br />

the Deborah Weatherspoon PhD. RN<br />

from the Medical News Today – when<br />

we exercise, our muscles become more<br />

sensitive to insulin therefore helping to<br />

possibly reverse insulin resistance by<br />

changing into a more active lifestyle.<br />

In addition, it is essential to reduce your<br />

stress levels and decrease or remove<br />

stressors. In a prior article, I mentioned<br />

the effects of stress in our bodies and<br />

how our bodies under chronic stress may<br />

increase the levels of cortisol, therefore<br />

further aggravating the insulin resistance.<br />

Cortisol is a hormone that acts exactly<br />

the opposite of insulin. In the presence<br />

of stress, we release cortisol, and will<br />

make sugar/glucose more available just<br />

in case we need to run or fight to save<br />

our lives.<br />

In our bodies, our response to stress<br />

will be the same, whether the stress is<br />

emotional (like a stressful relationship)<br />

or physical (running away from a lion),<br />

whether is it perceived or real, the body’s<br />

response is the same. In case of stress the<br />

heart rate will increase, glucose levels in<br />

the blood will also increase in case your<br />

body needs more energy to fight that<br />

lion or run away or if you need to think<br />

more rapidly to figure out a situation.<br />

Therefore, it is imperative to decrease<br />

those stressors and improve our response<br />

to those emotional, physical real and<br />

perceived stresses. Meditation, yoga,<br />

prayer, counseling, talking to a good<br />

friend and other forms of stress relievers<br />

will help to decrease cortisol levels and<br />

improve insulin response. Chiropractic<br />

care may help with decreasing your<br />

stress response and regulating your<br />

nervous system.<br />

Other ways to improve your insulin<br />

sensitivity would be to reduce sugar<br />

intake. Reduce added sugars, sugary<br />

drinks, process foods or boxed/canned<br />

foods that often contain preservatives<br />

and may be high in corn syrup.<br />

Consuming Omega 3 fatty acids found<br />

in fish and nuts will also help because<br />

these will decrease inflammation in the<br />

body and improve insulin response.<br />

Adding herbs and spices such as<br />

cinnamon, may help to decrease blood<br />

sugar levels, turmeric (curcumin),<br />

ginger and garlic that are powerful<br />

anti-inflammatories and may help reduce<br />

insulin resistance and improve function.<br />

Along with the already mentioned dietary<br />

changes, consuming fiber, eating plenty<br />

of fruits and vegetables and start juicing<br />

vegetables such as carrots, spinach and<br />

celery will help with the regulation of<br />

gut friendly bacteria which has proven<br />

to help with insulin function.<br />

In addition, if necessary, loose couple<br />

pounds – according to an article published<br />

in Medical News Today, loosing 5.7%<br />

of body weight (this is for a person that<br />

weights about 200lbs. losing about<br />

10-14 pounds – can reduce the risk<br />

of diabetes by 58% and may increase<br />

insulin sensitivity giving the individual<br />

a better function of insulin and less<br />

risks of cardiovascular disease, diabetes,<br />

hormonal problems etc.<br />

Lastly, there are several supplements that<br />

may also help with insulin sensitivity such<br />

as chromium. It is important to consult<br />

with a health provider before starting<br />

the use of this or any supplements.<br />

In conclusion, many of our body’s<br />

responses and hormones are dependent<br />

on how well we balance glucose and<br />

insulin responses, hence making the<br />

goal of becoming insulin sensitive is<br />

paramount in our quest for overall health.<br />

As always, have an amazing month and<br />

until the next one.<br />

276 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>



CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 277





A conversation is happening between<br />

two parties: the speaker and the listener.<br />

Each one plays a very important part<br />

in this ‘dance’. If we truly listened,<br />

we would hear more than just the<br />

words of our opponent. We would<br />

hear what was not said. We would<br />

hear the true meaning behind the<br />

spoken words.<br />

Let me tell you a little story: a couple<br />

of weeks ago, my son came into our<br />

bedroom at night – it must have been<br />

around midnight. This was unusual.<br />

Normally, he would just go to the<br />

bathroom and then straight back to<br />

bed. Well, he did not say anything<br />

while standing next to me, then turned<br />

around and went to the bathroom<br />

and then back to sleep. Still, it was<br />

a bit strange.<br />

The next day, he did not remember<br />

the incident, as I had expected. That<br />

evening though, when my husband<br />

brought him to bed, he suddenly<br />

erupted into a panic. He started<br />

to cry and scream hysterically that<br />

he did not want to go to sleep and<br />

dream about him dying again. So he<br />

must have had a nightmare the night<br />

before about him being dead. My<br />

husband could not calm him down<br />

and our son called for me.<br />

Seeing my son in such distress was<br />

heartbreaking. Normally, I would<br />

have held him and hoped that his fear<br />

would disappear and that he would<br />

calm down, but I would probably not<br />

have been able to shift his mindset.<br />

I would not have known what to<br />

do in that moment. Well, thanks<br />

to my coaching education, I was<br />

trained for situations like this one.<br />

When I held my son in my arms, I<br />

instinctively went into ‘coach position’<br />

and just listened. I heard him repeat:<br />

“I do not want to dream about dying<br />

anymore!” So, I asked: “Well, what<br />

do you want to dream about?” That<br />

was the million-dollar question. That<br />

was the question that moved him<br />

out of his terrified mindset almost<br />

instantly. He said: “I want to dream<br />

about something fun.” So I asked him<br />

to tell me about a time when he had<br />

fun and he started talking about the<br />

playground the other day, and the kids<br />

he played with and he laughed and<br />

was happy again. This happened in<br />

a matter of less than 3 minutes after<br />

I took him into my arms.<br />

He went to sleep happily that night,<br />

hopefully dreaming about his time<br />

on the playground.<br />

What happened here was, that I was<br />

solely focusing my attention on him.<br />

Generally, we focus our attention to<br />

the problem and try to find a solution,<br />

so focusing our attention within<br />

ourselves to find the answer. In this<br />

case, I did not focus on myself at all,<br />

I was just listening to my child and<br />

responded to what he was telling me.<br />

The thing with listening is that for the<br />

most part, we listen with an agenda.<br />

We listen to either reply, we listen to<br />

give advice, we listen to talk about<br />

ourselves. But we hardly ever listen<br />

just to listen. Which means that<br />

while the other person is talking, we<br />

are only half listening because in our<br />

mind we already work on the reply.<br />

Many people feel that they are being<br />

misunderstood or that people receive<br />

what was said in the wrong way.<br />

Well, as a speaker, we can bend over<br />

backwards all we want to get our<br />

message across. If a person comes with<br />

a specific mindset, they are bound to<br />

misunderstand since they are guided<br />

by their emotions, limiting beliefs,<br />

self-sabotaging behavior, or current<br />

state of mind.<br />

And yet most people are afraid to ask<br />

whether what they heard was truly<br />

what the speaker meant. And so we<br />

rather feel hurt – often for no reason<br />

at all, than having our fears confirmed<br />

that the person who talked said what<br />

we understood on purpose.<br />

So, what can we do to resolve<br />

a brooding dispute over spoken<br />

words before it can manifest itself in<br />

resentment? We have to overcome our<br />

fear and ask the speaker if what we<br />

understood is what he/she meant to<br />

say. In most cases, the answer will be<br />

no. Don’t assume that someone who<br />

tells you something is trying to hurt<br />

you. Most of the time, it is your own<br />

mind that creates this assumption.<br />

Our emotions can become a tricky<br />

part in conversations. Therefore, don’t<br />

focus on how you feel, but solely on<br />

what the other person is saying. Don’t<br />

shift your thoughts toward what you<br />

want to reply. You can do that after<br />

you heard every word.<br />

Truly listen to what is said. You will<br />

hear so much more!<br />

278 CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong>


CENTRAL NY WOMAN ONLINE :: <strong>MARCH</strong>/<strong>APRIL</strong> EDITION <strong>2021</strong> 279





What if you had to leave your house<br />

in a hurry? Would you be ready?<br />

So many people would not know<br />

what to do if the power were out<br />

for more than a few hours.<br />

Whether there is a<br />

major storm coming, a<br />

government lockdown, or<br />

even civil unrest, we need<br />

to always be prepared. We<br />

cannot afford to assume<br />

that something cannot<br />

happen where we live.<br />

Years ago, the police came<br />

through my neighborhood<br />

knocking on all the doors<br />

and making everyone<br />

evacuate because there<br />

was a gas leak in the area.<br />

In many areas all over<br />

the country, there are<br />

power lined that are above<br />

ground. This leaves them<br />

vulnerable to wind or<br />

ice storms, felled trees,<br />

vehicles hitting poles and<br />

transformers, and even<br />

damage from animals.<br />

When a storm is coming,<br />

you do not want to be in<br />

the crowd that rushes to the store.<br />

You want to already be ready for most<br />

things that could happen.<br />

Of course, we can never predict<br />

every possible type of incident, but<br />

each of us can have a basic level of<br />

preparedness. Most people have a<br />

couple of flashlights and extra batteries<br />

and candles. That, however, will<br />

not keep you warm if it is winter and<br />

there is a multi-day outage. Make<br />

sure at a minimum that you have<br />

a way to create electricity. This is<br />

especially important if you or someone<br />

in your household takes medication<br />

that requires refrigeration.<br />

In fact, food, water and any needed<br />

medicine are the must haves that you<br />

should make sure to keep on hand.<br />

We do not want to break the bank<br />

preparing, but it makes great sense<br />

to pick up a few extra cans of food<br />

and things for hygiene each time we<br />

go out. Before you know it, you will<br />

have built up a decent stockpile of<br />

required items. Water is the most<br />

important because you cannot live<br />

without it. You can last longer with<br />