2021 Issue 4 Jul/Aug - Focus Mid-South magazine

Serving the Mid-South LGBT+ Community and its Allies | JUL+AUG 2021 

Body 

Beautiful 

MISS COCO PERU 

OUR MISS MOTHIE GOT THE INTERVIEW 

OF HER LIFE! MEET THE HILARIOUS 


THE HEALING 

POWER OF YOGA 

ACCIDENTS AND AGING AFFECT OUR 

BODY’S CONDITION. LEARN HOW TO 

MEDIATE PAIN AND STRESS WITH YOGA 

OPIOIDS VS 

CHIROPRACTIC 

TREATMENT 

OPIOIDS POSE A SERIOUS THREAT OF 

ADDICTION. CHIROPRACTIC 

CARE IS A SAFE ALTERNATIVE

Let’s get Memphis to ZERO. 

Together, we can reach our goal 

to get Memphis to ZERO 

new HIV infections 

by 2030. 

endhiv901.org

CONTENTS 

JUL+AUG 2021 

50 

44 

29 

18 

6 MEET OUR CONTRIBUTORS 

7 THEME: BODY BEAUTIFUL 

8 ASK ALLIE 

Understanding teen who chooses to go 

au naturel when it comes to body odor. 

12 FOCUS SOCIAL MEDIA 

See what others are saying about us. 

14 FAITH+SPIRITUALITY 

In any religion, your body is a temple. 

18 PET FOCUS 

Learn the strategies to overcome the 

perils of traveliing with your pet. 

20 TRAVEL 

‘Hotlanta!’ Our favorite gay travel guru 

reveals where to go when in Atlanta. 

22 TRAVEL 

Get off the over-traveled country road to 

Nashville with three music city choices. 

24 ARTS+ENTERTAINMENT 

Real news and gossip from a real 

Hollywood Tattler! 

26 HEALTH+WELLNESS 

Follow the journey of one woman using 

yoga to heal her body and mind’s pain. 


Miss Mothie meets her idol, Miss Coco 

Peru, in a fabulously fun Zoom call! 


From Publisher Ray Rico: choose kind 

words when speaking to yourself. 

33 LGBT CROSSWORD PUZZLE 

This week: Temporal Warp 

34 LIFE 

With crisp black line work and subtle 

shadows, tattoo artist Clover Faulhaber 

brings some real skin to their game. 


Using ancient practices, Pavo Salon treats 

guests to Earth-friendly experiences. 


Oh COVID pandemic. How you’ve 

sidelined our workouts, but local trainer 

Nikki Veit shows us how to beat you! 


Conquer trauma’s lasting effects with 

trauma-focused counseling. 


Local video producer, Savannah Bearden, 

tries Reiki for a chance to heal her stress. 


When misused, opiods can be deadly. 

Get the same pain relief through 

chiropractic manipulation. 


Pop culture staff picks! 

50 LIFE 

Losing a loved one to COVID brings a 

special kind of anger and grief. 


Learn how to love your body. 

52 MUSIC 

Meet up and coming LGBT musician, 

Lana Blue. 

ON THE COVER 

The fabulous Miss Coco Peru! 

Story on page 29 

BODY BEAUTIFUL / JUL+AUG / focuslgbt.com / Page 3

team 

PUBLISHER 

Ray Rico 

EDITOR/ 

CREATIVE DIRECTOR 

Joan Allison 

EDITORIAL DESIGN 

Joan Allison 

ADVERTISING DESIGN 

Daphne Butler 

INTERACTIVE 

+ SOCIAL MEDIA 

Chellie Bowman 

Tracy Love 

ADVERTISING+FINANCE 

Leila Hinkle 

info@focusmidsouth.com 

901.800.1172 

DISTRIBUTION 

+ SUBSCRIPTIONS 

Randall Sloan 

Leila Hinkle 

RE:FOCUS PODCAST 


Goldie Dee 

Allysun Wunderland 

contributors 

Joan Allison 

Joey Amato 

Sheena Barnett 

Savannah Bearden 


KeOnte Criswell 

Tricia Dewey 

Sarah Rutledge Fischer 

Sarah Hogan 

MothMothMoth 

Robin Beaudoin Ownby 

Ray Rico 

Scot Robinson 

Olivia Roman 

Nikki R. Veit 

Chris Reeder Young 

Focus ® Mid-South is all about LGBT + people and their allies…their work, play, 

families, creativity, style, health and wealth, bodies and souls. Our focus is on you. 

Focus ® Mid-South is published bi-monthly and distributed free throughout the 

greater Mid-South area. Focus reserves the right to refuse to sell space for any 

advertisement the staff deems inappropriate for the publication. Press releases 

must be received by the first of the month for the following issue. All content of 

this magazine, including and without limitation to the design, advertisements, 

art, photos and editorial content, as well as the selection, coordination and 

arrangement thereof, is Copyright ©2020, Focus ® Mid-South. All Rights Reserved. 

No portion of this magazine may be copied or reprinted without the express 

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BE PART OF OUR NEXT PUBLICATION 

‘YOUR BEST LIFE’ 

SEP+OCT 2021 

Submit story ideas: editor@focusmidsouth.com 

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Page 4 / focuslgbt.com / JUL+AUG / BODY BEAUTIFUL

TAROT 

READINGS 

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Bus: 901-767-7744 Cell: 901-550-5852 

www.teamkte.com 

As your local agent, I’m here to 

help life go right. ® That’s why I 

take time to get to know you and 

understand what you really need. 

LET’S TALK TODAY. 

Learn more about 

HIV prevention at 

Planned Parenthood. 

866.711.1717 

PlannedParenthood.org/Tennessee 

State Farm 

Bloomington, IL 

1706841

FEATURED WRITERS IN THIS ISSUE 

FOCUS® CONTRIBUTORS 

We rely on community contributors for 

Focus magazine news and stories. 

A huge thanks to these dedicated writers! 

Got a story that needs to be told? Pitch your 

story ideas to Joan at editor@focusmidsouth.com 

Chris 

Tricia 

Robin 

Savannah 

Olivia 

KeOnte 

Sarah 

MothMothMoth 

LB Photography 

Savannah Bearden is a 

writer/performer/video 

editor/producer/LGBTQ+ 

ally/bon vivant who was 

born and raised in Memphis. 

She daylights as the 

Director of Communications 

for Planned Parenthood 

of TN and & North MS and 

moonlights as a content 

creator for the people and 

organizations she loves. 

KeOnte Criswell is a retired 

Air Force sergeant and 

fabulous 40-something 

mother and grandmother 

who is passionate about 

feminism, equality, and 

brunch. When she’s not out 

organizing chaos, she can 

be found sitting in stillness. 

Tricia Dewey is a longtime 

Memphis transplant, who 

has grown to admire the 

grit and grind. She is also a 

mom, wife, runner, reader, 

recovering lawyer, tree 

hugger, and ally. 

Sarah Rutledge Fischer is a 

native Memphian currently 

living near the Gulf Coast. 

When she isn't penning 

advice as Allie or writing 

other pieces for Focus, 

Sarah runs a local chapter 

of Prism United, a nonprofit 

focused on serving the 

needs of LGBTQ+ youth. 

She is also an artist and 

art teacher, specializing 

in intuitive paintings and 

figurative drawings. 

MothMothMoth AKA 

Magical Miss Mothie is a 

happy groovy little bug who 

bakes, writes, and twirls for 

a living! She’s the leader of 

the Joy Nation! And your 

best friend. 

Robin Beaudoin Ownby 

is a lifelong Memphian 

by choice. She attended 

Memphis College of Art 

where she received a 

B.F.A., and studied Special 

Education at the University 

of Memphis, working in 

education and nutrition 

before finding her calling in 

parenting and journalism. 

She is a regular contributing 

editor with Memphis Health 

+ Fitness magazine. When 

not on the Memphis scene 

for work, Robin stays busy 

traveling and enjoys every 

moment with her two 

children, two rescue dogs, 

and husband. She also 

enjoys gourmet food, live 

theatre, writing reviews, and 

reading. 

Olivia Roman is a student 

at the University of 

Memphis who loves a good 

story. If she’s not reading 

five books at once while 

writing five more, you can 

find her at Shelby Farms or 

playing cornhole in Overton 

Square. 

Chris Reeder Young is an 

applied anthropologist and 

has lived in Memphis for 16 

years. 


theme 

Body 

Beautiful 


life 

Dear Allie... 

by Sarah Rutledge Fischer (she/they) 

My sister asked 

me to talk to her 18-year-old son 

about his hygiene, and I’m not sure 

exactly what to say. He has cultural 

beliefs about personal hygiene and 

refuses to use deodorant. When 

my sister has tried to talk with him 

about it, he has been very sensitive 

and reacted badly. 

He is a clean kid, but he is 

also a growing boy. Recently he 

expressed a desire to move up into 

a new role at work that would put 

him around more of the public. His 

mom is concerned that his aroma 

will be seen as unprofessional. I 

have only ever noticed it once, and 

to be fair, we had just finished a 

4-mile hike, so I probably smelled 

too. LOL. 

Anyway, what do I say? I 

understand why he would feel 

sensitive about this. I don’t want to 

hurt his feelings, but I also want to 

help. 

Yours, 

Perspiring Uncle 

Dear P.U., 

Can you imagine anything 

more uncomfortable than talking 

with your mother about body 

odor? It must be right up there 

with conversations about sex 

and puberty. As parents, we 

cannot let awkwardness keep us 

from important conversations, 

but when it comes to hygiene, 

as with sex and puberty, we 

must work to separate facts 

from misinformation, and biased 

assumptions. 

Dear 

P.U. 


We can’t talk about 

deodorant and antiperspirant 

without first talking about 

body odor. Sweating is a 

healthy function of temperature 

regulation in the body that, on 

its own, does not create any 

odor. Body odor is actually 

caused by a surface bacteria 

that consumes our sweat 

secretions and releases a 

sulfurous molecule called 

thioalcohol (the odor created 

by this process can vary 

depending on things like 

hormone levels, diet, illness, or 

medication). 

Antiperspirants use 

aluminum salts to block 

sweat producing pores, which 

deprives the bacteria of their 

meal. Most deodorants use 

chemicals to prevent odor by 

killing the bacteria. Most natural 

deodorants kill the bacteria 

using antimicrobial ingredients 

like sage and/or neutralize 

the thioalcohol odor using 

ingredients like charcoal and 

baking soda. 

The actual value of 

antiperspirant and deodorant 

is up for debate. There is 

evidence that use of aluminumbased 

antiperspirants can 

cause a buildup of aluminum 

in the body (though no 

conclusive evidence that this 

buildup causes problems). Even 

deodorants, both chemical 

and natural, change the body’s 

external microbiome, a complex 

system of helpful bacteria that 

act as the skin’s first line of 

defense. 

The prevalence of daily 

deodorant and antiperspirant 

use in the modern United 

States is largely a function 

of marketing. There is an old 

business aphorism that you 

should sell the problem you 

solve, not the product you 

make. Nowhere is this practice 

as evident as in the marketingfueled 

American obsession 

with sanitizing the body. In 

the early twentieth century, 

Edna Murphey struggled to sell 

her antiperspirant, Odorono, 

because people thought 

preventing sweat and natural 

odors was unnecessary at best 

and unhealthy at worst. So, 

in 1912, she hired a marketing 

team that undertook to exploit 

the fears and insecurities of 

its target demographic. Ad 

campaigns with bylines like 

“The most humiliating moment 

in my life,” convinced American 

women that sweat and body 

odor were embarrassing 

faux pas that could ruin a 

woman’s social life without 

her even knowing why. Sales 

of Odorono sky-rocketed and 

other deodorant brands quickly 

jumped on the shame-based 

advertising bandwagon. A 

couple of decades later, when 

advertisers tapped into men’s 

depression-era insecurities to 

further expand their market, 

our nation’s daily deodorant 

habit was solidified. 

These days, many people are 

choosing to ditch antiperspirant 

and deodorant altogether with 

success. Some people report 

an increase in body odor 

for a couple of weeks as the 

body’s microbiome returns to 

its natural equilibrium. After 

that, most people find body 

odor manageable with basic 

cleanliness and hygiene. As 

for your nephew, since you 

mention having only noticed 

his body odor after a 4-mile 

hike (an exertion that would 

challenge the sturdiest of 

deodorants), I would bet that 

he is managing just fine. 

But let’s talk about the 

cultural context of body 

odor and why his decision 

might make your sister 

uncomfortable. Throughout 

time and cross cultures, 

scent has been used by 

dominant groups as a way 

of othering subordinate or 

disfavored groups. Whether 

in ancient Greece, modern 

America, or indigenous Brazil, 

dominant classes consistently 

characterize their own scent 

as pleasant or nonexistent and 

everyone else’s as foul. 

You don’t specify your 

sister’s culture but given that 

her son’s hygiene beliefs are 

culturally based, I assume 

she and your nephew are of a 

culture or race that has been 

marginalized or discriminated 

against in our country. Nonwhite 

populations in the 

United States have long fought 

prejudiced messaging that 

they carry an unpleasant odor. 

And it has been the job of a 

responsible parent to help their 

child navigate these prejudices, 

often without even realizing 

that they are doing so. 

If this is the case, your sister 

may be feeling an intensity 

around this issue that might 

make it hard to consider any 

alternatives to the one she 

feels is most safe for her son. 

When you sit down to discuss 

hygiene with your nephew, it 

might help to start by putting 

his mother’s fears into context. 

It may be that he will never 

have a supervisor accuses him 

of being unclean based solely 

on his race or identity. But fears 

that he might would not be 

unfounded. 

Once you’ve talked about the 

cultural context of his decision, 

and before you tell him what 

you know, ask him to share 

his thoughts about hygiene 

and deodorant. You may be 

surprised to find that they are 

researched and well-reasoned. 

And if you and he feel like 

your sister needs a little more 

assurance that he is making a 

responsible decision, you could 

work with him to make a plan 

for any worst-case scenarios. 

After that, maybe take him 

out for another one of those 

4-mile hikes. That should get 

you started. 

Your friend, 

Allie 

Submit a question; email Allie 

Allie@focusmidsouth.com. Focus 

Mid-South reserves the right to 

edit letters for length and clarity. 


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faith+spirituality 

YOUR BODY 

IS A TEMPLE 

The Philosophy Uniting Religions 

by Olivia Roman 


The phrase “your body is a temple,” plucked from the New Testament of the Holy Bible, has stood the test of time at 

the expense of having its meaning forgotten by society at large. It was Saint Paul who scorns the parish for their 

physical immorality, asking “…do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you...”(NKJV, 

1 Corinthians 6:19). He continued, saying that God has gifted us this physical life for a short time, and that our bodies 

are vessels; believers are obliged to give God a suitable place to reside, which extends to how we conduct and care for 

ourselves physically. This idea isn’t exclusive to Christianity and can be found in other religious texts, with specific 

emphasis on three areas: 

DIETARY CLEANLINESS 

Fasting is practiced in order to grow 

closer to the divine by distancing oneself 

from worldly dependencies, such as food 

and other pleasures. 

Christianity: Lent is the forty-day 

Christian fast in which followers give alms, 

fast from meat on certain days, and 

completely abstain from another selected 

food or activity. This spiritual cleansing 

through physical deprivation 

commemorates the forty-day period in 

which Jesus wandered the desert, fasting 

and refusing temptation. 

Judaism: The Jewish fast of Yom Kippur, 

or the Day of Atonement, is the culmination 

of a ten day penitential period in which one 

abstains from physical pleasures in an 

effort to atone for their wrongdoings and 

purify their spirit. 

Islam: Ramadan, a sacred month of 

intense fasting, is observed by Muslims 

commemorating the revelation of the 

Qur’an. No food is consumed during sunlit 

hours, encouraging increased selfreflection, 

spiritual revitalization, and 

strengthening one’s relationship with Allah. 

Other religions: Buddhists and Hindus 

also participate in fasting in an effort to 

cleanse their spirits. While Sikhs do not, it 

should be noted that they’re highly 

encouraged to practice moderation in 

every aspect of their lives year-round. 

EXERCISE 

Most religions promote strengthening 

one’s physical fitness as long as it doesn’t 

take precedence over the individual’s 

relationship with God. Below are teachings 

for followers seeking spiritual enrichment 

through exercise: 

Christianity: “For physical training is of 

some value, but godliness has value for all 

things, holding promise for both the 

present life and the life to come.” 1 Timothy 

4:8 

Judaism: “So long as one exercises and 

exerts himself vigorously . . . no illness will 

befall him and his physical powers will be 

strengthened.”—Maimonides, Jewish 

philosopher 

Islam: “The strong believer is more 

beloved to Allah than the weak believer, 

but there is goodness in both of them.”— 

Hadith, Sahih Muslim 2664 

Other religions: Yoga, an exercise 

strengthening one’s physical, mental, and 

spiritual health, is one of the six schools of 

Hindu philosophy that is also observed by 

Buddhists and Jainists. 

ABLUTIONS 

Religious ablutions are ceremonial 

washings viewed as acts of reverence that 

aid spiritual purification through physical 

cleansing. 

Christianity: Baptism, a rite in which one 

is partially or fully submerged in water, 

symbolizes the dedication of one’s life to 

Christ. Foot-washing is also practiced in 

commemoration of Christ stooping to wash 

the feet of his Apostles. 

Judaism: The two main forms of Jewish 

ablution are full-body immersion, or tevilah, 

and washing hands with a cup, or halakha. 

While the majority of occasions 

traditionally involving tevilah are only 

observed by Orthodox Jews, all converts 

must be immersed. 

Islam: Muslims turn towards Mecca five 

times each day in prayer. Before doing so, 

they’re required to perform wudu—ritual 

washing of the hands, mouth, arms, nostrils, 

and feet. If water is unavailable, sand is an 

approved alternative. 

Other religions: Buddhists, Hindus, and 

followers of Shintoism all practice ablution 

before engaging in worship. 

It appears that the universal truth all 

religions uphold is that our bodies truly are 

temples—gifts from God that we are tasked 

with detoxifying, strengthening, and 

cleansing physically before inviting Him in 

spiritually. 

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pet focus 

TRAVELING 

WITH DOGS 


Not all dogs that act nervous 

when they get into a car feel 

that way out of fear or anxiety 

resulting from a traumatic 

experience. It could be 

something as simple as having 

an accident in the car once 

before and the driver scolded 

the animal. Such an event can 

cause anxiety. Something more 

serious like a crash could also be 

the culprit. If the nervousness is 

from fear and anxiety, the 

animal can be retrained to 

accept the ride as a good thing. 

But it does take time and 

patience to help the animal. 

On the other hand, some 

dogs and cats actually get 

nauseous from motion sickness. 

As a result of the sickness they 

associate the car ride with 

feeling ill. Some recognizable 

signs of motion sickness include 

the obvious reactions such as: 

• Heavy drooling 

• Strings of saliva hanging from 

the mouth 

• Hanging their heads, tucking 

their tail or looking distressed 

• Pacing 

• Whimpering 

Dogs or cats that suffer from 

motion sickness will most likely 

require medication to travel 

comfortably. Consult with your 

veterinarian about an antinausea 

medication such as 

Cerenia (maropitant) which is 

one of the best on the market 

since it works on the nausea 

center of the brain. You can get 

an injection for 24-hour relief or 

tablets if your journey will 

require more than one day of 

travel. 

You may also wish to consider 

alternative treatments such as 

Rescue Remedy which some 

people think acts like the 

equivalent of a small alcoholic 

drink to calm the nerves. Or the 

use of a pheromone collar such 

as an Adaptil which will give off 

soothing hormones to help 

reduce anxiety. 

The one option you should 

always avoid, without first 

consulting your vet, is to assume 

a human over-the-counter 

medication will work. Dogs 

metabolize drugs differently so 

there is good possibility human 

drugs won’t be effective. Plus 

these drugs are not licensed for 

use in animals so the side 

effects are unknown. Some 

human drugs can be deadly to 

animals. 

If you are not sure if your dog 

will get sick from their 

nervousness, it’s a good idea to 

be prepared for it anyway. You 

can make the trip easier on 

everyone, yourself included 

since you will be the one 

cleaning any messes, with a few 

proactive moves prior to the 

trip, such as: 

• Avoid giving your pet a meal 

just before leaving. Feed the 

dog at least 3 hours prior to 

leaving or wait until after the 

trip. 

• If possible take the dog for a 

walk before leaving. This may 

help get him to empty his 

bowels which is also good 

before a trip with a nervous 

dog, or to burn off some 

energy and help him relax. 

• Designate a certain place or 

seat for your dog. A spot 

where they can see out the 

window will help. If you have 

small dogs consider 

obtaining a dog car booster 

seat to raise them up to 

window height. 

• Covering the area with a 

familiar blanket will provide 

some comfort & familiarity of 

home. Or even bringing along 

a favorite toy. 

• If your dog is a chewer, 

consider bringing along his 

bones or chew sticks to help 

him handle his stress. 

• Confine your animal to a 

crate in the backseat. Line 

the crate with his favorite 

towel, or use puppy pads to 

catch messes. Should you be 

involved in a traffic accident, 

having your pet crated 

provides the best protection 

for your furbie. 

During your travels you can 

also help reduce the anxiety or 

nervousness by following a few 

simple tips such as: 

• Never shout or scold your pet 

should he or she have an 

accident. This will only 

increase the anxiety. Speak 

to your pet in a calm, soft 

and reassuring voice. 

• Avoid overheating the car 

interior, smoking in the car or 

excessively loud music. All 

these things can cause 

nervousness or nausea in 

even the seasoned traveler 

let alone the nervous one. 

• Offer plenty of breaks. Not 

just for potty breaks but 

allow the dog some time to 

stretch his legs, relax or burn 

off some nervous energy. 

During each break offer your 

dog some fresh water, but 

continue to withhold food. 

• Most of all, when you arrive 

at your destination, do what 

you must to reassure your 

dog he has been a good boy. 

Try to end the journey with a 

happy ending. You can use 

treats, one on one play time , 

a game of fetch or a nice long 

walk. Whatever it is that will 

make your dog happy. Treat 

him to something that offers 

pleasure to him so he 

associates the travel as a 

good and rewarding event. 

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Almost everyone has been to 

Atlanta at some point or 

another. Whether for a 

conference or just passing 

through the Hartsfield-Jackson 

airport, the busiest airport in the 

world, Atlanta sees more than 

100 million visitors per year. As 

the largest city in Georgia and 

one of the largest in the country 

by population, Atlanta has 

exploded to become an 

economic powerhouse. 

Skyscrapers are popping up 

throughout the city and many 

Fortune 500 companies have a 

presence in the region. Of 

course, the city is known for 

their hometown favorites: 

Coca-Cola, Delta Airlines and 

Turner Broadcasting System, 

which was founded by none 

other than Ted Turner, who’s 

name is everywhere in Atlanta. 

Turner has a downtown street 

named after him as well as 3 

namesake restaurants – Ted’s 

Montana Grill – just in the 

Atlanta city limits. 

Not too far from the 

downtown restaurant is 

Centennial Olympic Park, home 

of the 1996 summer Olympics. 

The park is adjacent to three 

other incredible attractions: the 

Georgia Aquarium, World of 

Coca-Cola and National Center 

for Civil & Human Rights. 

On this visit, I decided to first 

swing by World of Coca-Cola, 

which gives visitors a wonderful 

overview of the history of the 

brand, talks about the secret 

formula and of course offers the 

opportunity to sample Coca- 

Cola products from around the 

world. If you time your visit right, 

you may even get a chance to 

take a picture with their mascot, 

the Polar Bear. 

Next, I stopped by the 

National Center for Civil & 

Human Rights, a museum I had 

visited in the past. This time I 

was given a tour by the 

Executive Director for the 

LGBTQ Institute at the museum. 

Although the Center doesn’t 

have a specific LGBTQ 

exhibition, it does talk about the 

fight for LGBTQ rights 

throughout the years. The 

Center also houses the largest 

collection of papers and 

artifacts of Dr. Martin Luther 

King, Jr., and has recently 

expanded their offerings to 

include a human rights training 

program for law enforcement 

officials as well as Diversity, 

Equity and Inclusion (DEI) 

experiences for workplaces. 

One of my favorite things 

about Atlanta is MARTA, their 

public transportation system. It 

is one of the most efficient and 

inexpensive in the country, easily 

connecting travelers from the 

airport to all parts of the city 

including Buckhead, where I was 

staying for this visit. 

While the Buckhead 

neighborhood isn’t known for its 

LGBTQ nightlife, it is however 

known for its abundance of 

luxury shopping. Lenox Square 

is one of the most upscale malls 

in the country and boasts retail 

boutiques including Fendi, Louis 

Vuitton, and Prada. Don’t forget 

to bring your credit card! 

The reason I chose to stay in 

Buckhead is because I wanted to 

check out the brand new 

Kimpton Sylvan Hotel. The 

mid-century modern property is 

a short ride, or 20-minute walk 

to the MARTA station and 

ATLANTA 

PRIDE 

travel 

JOURNEY 

by Joey Amato 

features a rooftop bar, daily 

social hour with complimentary 

wine as well as a 24-hour fitness 

center with Peloton bikes for 

those looking to work off some 

calories. Speaking of food, I 

would highly recommend the 

Charred Cauliflower + Cucumber 

from Willow Bar located just 

outside the hotel lobby. 

The Kimpton brand is known 

for being one of the most 

LGBTQ-inclusive hotel brands in 

the country so whenever I have 

the chance to stay at one of their 

properties, I usually do. They are 

also a global partner of IGLTA. 

This September, Atlanta will 

host the IGLTA Global 

Convention. The International 

LGBTQ+ Travel Association will 

welcome guests from around 

the globe to midtown Atlanta for 

possibly the first in-person 

LGBTQ convention since the 

start of the COVID-19 pandemic. 

Registration is now open 

through the IGLTA website. I’ve 

been to this convention 

numerous times and can’t wait 

to see all my friends and 

colleagues in the same room 

once again. 

Midtown Atlanta is the 

epicenter of LGBTQ culture and 

nightlife in Atlanta. There is no 

lack of bars and restaurants 

here. Some standouts include 

Joe’s on Juniper, Blake’s on the 

Park, and My Sister’s Room, a 

two-story lesbian-owned dance 

bar which has become a favorite 

among Atlanta’s LGBTQ 

community. 

The Midtown neighborhood is 

also known as the cultural hub of 

the city with over 25 different 

arts and cultural venues and 

more than 30 permanent 

performing arts groups residing 

in the area including the 

Grammy-winning Atlanta 

Symphony Orchestra, and the 

world-renowned High Museum 

of Art. 

Not too far away is Zoo 

Atlanta, an AZA accredited 

facility home to over 1,000 

animals. Having a deep love for 

animals, I decided to take the 

elephant encounter, a one-hour 

experience that gives visitors a 

behind-the-scenes look at how 

zoo staff care for these majestic 

animals. During the program, we 

learned about the elephant’s 

behaviors and even had the 

opportunity to feed them. In this 

case, Tara was especially fond of 

the lettuce that I was giving her. 

After touring the zoo, head 

over to Guac y Margys, an 

LGBTQ-owned restaurant 

located along the Atlanta 

BeltLine’s Eastside Trail. 

Everything I tried here was on 

point, from the house made 

guacamole to the slow roasted 

pork tacos. If you are in the 

mood to sample a variety of 

different cuisine, check out 

Ponce City Market, located in 

the historic Sears, Roebuck & 

Co. building. The indoor/outdoor 

market offers dozens of dining 

and retail options including my 

favorite, Botiwalla Indian Street 

Food. 

Atlanta is truly a multi-cultural 

destination that needs to be 

explored in its entirety. Venture 

away from the tourist-focused 

neighborhoods and meet the 

locals. You are sure to find 

surprises around every corner. 

To learn more, visit https:// 

discoveratlanta.com/ 


travel 

DAY TRIPPIN’ TO 

NASHVILLE 

story and photos courtesy of Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum 

We’ve waited patiently, masked, and 

gotten vaccinated (this editor hopes 

you’ve gotten vaccinated). 

The numbers are headed in the right 

direction, and finally, we can enjoy some 

travel (with COVID precautions, of 

course...it ain’t over just yet)! Nashville is 

always a quick car-ride away. Consider 

seeing these historic sites. Tickets are 

timed on all, so advance ticket purchase 

is recommended. 

Historic RCA 

Studio B 

Built in 1957, 

Historic RCA Studio B 

operated for 20 years 

as the recording home 

of popular music 

titans. Approximately 

18,000 sessions were 

recorded within its 

walls, including more 

than 200 songs by 

Country Music Hall of Fame member Elvis Presley. Today, 

the studio is both a classroom for Nashville-area students 

and a popular cultural attraction. Tours are available to 

Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum visitors and 

depart from the museum. April 27th is the 

50th anniversary of Dolly Parton recording “Coat of Many 

Colors” at the Studio. 

Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum 

One of the largest 

history museums in the 

United States, the Country 

Music Hall of Fame and 

Museum collects, 

preserves and interprets 

country music and its 

history for the education 

and entertainment of 

diverse audiences. In 

exhibits, publications and 

educational programs, the 

museum explores the 

cultural importance and enduring beauty of the art form. The 

museum takes visitors on a journey through country music history 

through its permanent and temporary exhibitions. 

Sing Me Back Home: Folk Roots to the Present—the museum’s 

core, permanent 

exhibit—tells the story 

of country music from 

its pre-commercial 

roots in the 

nineteenth century 

through its vibrant life 

today. The exhibit 

immerses the visitor 

in the history and 

sounds of country music, its meanings and the lives and voices of 

its honored personalities. Rotating temporary exhibits taking place 

throughout the year, include the annual American Currents: State of 

the Music, focusing on the most significant developments in 

country music over the previous year. Other temporary exhibits on 

display at the museum this summer include The Station Inn: 

Bluegrass Beacon, We Could: The Songwriting Artistry of 

Boudleaux and Felice Bryant, Brooks & Dunn: Kings of 

Neon (through July 26, 2021), Kacey Musgraves: All of the 

Colors and Outlaws & Armadillos: Country’s Roaring ’70s. 

Hatch Show Print 

Hatch Show Print is a thriving letterpress poster and design shop creating and 

printing 500 to 600 poster jobs every year for clients ranging from Mumford & 

Sons and Willie Nelson to brands such as Fossil, Taschen and the U.S. Postal 

Service. Tours of Hatch Show Print begin in the production shop, allowing visitors 

to listen to the presses crank as they learn about the history. Participants will end 

in the Hatch Show Print Space for Design, where they can print their own keepsake 

piece. 

Founded by brothers Charles and Herbert Hatch, Hatch Show Print opened in 

Nashville in 1879. For much of the 20th century, the shop’s vibrant posters served 

as a leading advertising medium for Southern entertainment and included work for 

many members of the Grand Ole Opry such as Bill Monroe, Minnie Pearl and Ernest 

Tubb, and for rock & roll greats such as Elvis Presley and Chuck Berry. Thousands 

of posters and billboard-size advertisements were printed for traveling vaudeville 

and minstrel shows, circuses and carnivals barnstorming across the country. In 

1992, Hatch Show Print became a historic property of the Country Music Hall of 

Fame and Museum. 


lgbt arts+entertainment 

senior 

INSIDE 

story by Romeo San Vicente 

Mj Rodriguez joins Maya 

Rudolph for Apple+ comedy 

“Pose” is gone, so long live the careers of its luminous cast of 

trans women. That’s the collection of Pride Month wishes we 

sent out to the universe, and already one of those wishes has 

come true: Mother Blanca Evangelista, aka Mj Rodriguez, has a 

new series ordered at Apple+ that will co-star Maya Rudolph. 

The untitled comedy (sometimes known as “Loot”) from 

Emmy-winning creators Alan Yang (“Master of None”) and Matt 

Hubbard (“30 Rock”) follows Rudolph’s character as her 

husband leaves her 87 billion dollars. Rodriguez will play the 

executive director of the non-profit funded by her obscenely 

rich boss. That’s all we know, but we’re in. And until we get to 

lay eyes on it ourselves, we’ll be content with Rodriguez’s debut 

summer single, the Earth Wind & Fire-ish “Something to Say.” 

Oh, did you forget she sang on “Pose”? Well, catch up, because 

she can do this. 

‘Ailey’ dances into theaters this 

summer 

A towering figure in the world of dance, the legendary black 

choreographer Alvin Ailey formed the Alvin Ailey American 

Dance Theater and blazed a trail through contemporary dance 

before his death from AIDS in 1989. Now a fitting film tribute, 

the documentary “Ailey” from 

director Jamila Wignot, will 

see its post-Sundance Film 

Festival arrival this summer 

from Neon Releasing. Built 

around a treasure trove of 

archival footage, much of it 

featuring Ailey’s own words, 

as well as interviews with 

colleagues, the doc covers 

Ailey’s life and career, from 

the lack of opportunities for 

work due to racist practices in 

the dance world, to the 

formation of the AAADT and 

the fight to break down 

barriers for Black dancers and 

Black choreography. This 

immersive look at the man 

behind the legacy comes to 

theaters July 23 and deserves 

to be seen on the biggest 

possible screen. 

photo: Denis Makarenko 

‘John Wick 4’ gets a vital dose 

of Rina Sawayama 

If your 2020 pandemic listening habits involved relying 

entirely on the disco-dominated albums from Dua Lipa and Kylie 

Minogue to get you through it, then you slept on queer 

Japanese-British pop star Rina Sawayama and her critically 

acclaimed full-length debut, “Sawayama.” You have time – such 

as right now – to correct this lifestyle error, and when you fully 

absorb her witty, stylish, assertively feminist music, you’ll be 

even more pleased to learn that your new favorite wickedly 

talented artist who writes love songs to women is joining the 

cast of “John Wick: Chapter 4.” And if you’ve also still not 

caught up on the thrillingly violent “John Wick” series – it’s 

about a man named John Wick (Keanu Reeves) who’s very 

angry that bad guys killed his dog – then you have time to fix 

that, as well. We don’t know who Sawayama will be playing, but 

we hear it’s a major supporting role, and her casting 

announcement hit just before the inclusion of martial arts 

superstar Donnie Yen to the cast. There hasn’t been a dud in the 

“John Wick” series and our excitement for this next installment 

just grew by a hundred percent. 

‘Pray Away’ to focus on the 

persistent harm of Ex-Gay 

movement 

Exodus International has been dead and gone for eight years 

now – in other circumstances we’d say RIP but this deserves 

more of an LOL – and if you don’t know what they were, well, 

you actually do. Exodus was an umbrella organization of 

affiliated ex-gay “ministries” that sought to put queer people 

back in the closet by any means necessary. And now a new 

documentary coming to Netflix, “Pray Away,” the debut of 

filmmaker Kristine Stolakis, will explore the history of the group 

and the ongoing legacy of its oppressive, destructive mission. 

Exodus was formed in the 1970s by five queer men who formed 

a Bible study to support each other in their mutual decision not 

to form romantic relationships with other men. What grew from 

that was a monster of an organization that was seen as the only 

hope for Evangelical adults fighting their identity and as a 

punishment of choice for straight parents who wanted to erase 

the queerness from their kids. What changed? The leaders of 

the organization fell away one by one, realizing it had all been a 

colossal, dehumanizing mistake. So while many ex-gay groups 

still exist, this story, at least, has a happy-ish ending. Watch 

“Pray Away” when it drops this August. 


health+wellness 

YOGA’S 

HEALING 

POWER 

by KeOnte Criswell 


If you’d said to me a couple of years ago 

that I’d be the kind of person to say things 

like, “I feel disconnected from my body” or 

“connect to your breath”, I would have 

responded with a full belly laugh. 

Furthermore, if you’d told me I’d become 

the kind of person who could exist without 

coffee running through her veins I 

would’ve assumed that you also saw tiny 

green men in spacesuits. Then on a cool, 

crisp Monday morning in November 2019, 

that coffee-loving skeptical diva got into 

her car, left for work, and never came 

back. On that fateful day, the driver of a 

black Ford F150 changed everything 

about her when he crashed into her car. 

Even now, I can still hear the sound of 

metal crunching and glass bursting. After 

the boom came the blessed silence. I 

didn’t realize its significance at the time. 

From that moment on, silence has been 

there for me with the same warmth and 

comfort of a security blanket. 

The accident itself is a lost memory, 

extinguished by its trauma. But I was hurt 

with physical damage that even four 

months of physical therapy couldn’t fix. 

The right side of my body was practically 

useless. Halfway through my physical 

recovery, I caught COVID. In spite of 

everything I was going through, I didn’t 

feel overwhelmed. In his 1922 novel 

“Siddhartha,” Hermann Hesse wrote, 

“Within you, there is a stillness and a 

sanctuary to which you can retreat at any 

time and be yourself.” I didn’t know it at 

the time, but I had gone within myself to 

the stillness that Hesse described. The 

silence in my mind was like medicine. I was 

going through one of the worst 

experiences of my life however, I could 

find a way to soothe myself by going back 

to that place of silence. This sacred, silent 

place was giving me strength and the 

courage to honor myself in every area of 

my life. I started by quitting a job where I’d 

experienced constant microaggressions 

and pursuing my dream of becoming a 

certified yoga instructor. 

Even though my practice over the years 

had been sporadic, I never fell out of love 

with it. One of my favorite sayings is 

“when the student is ready, the teacher 

appears.” That’s exactly how my 

instructor, Megan, came into my life - via a 

random Instagram post about an 

upcoming Yoga Teacher Training (YTT) 

session. That post was more than a sign to 

me, it was a light. I met with Megan 

through a Zoom call and our connection 

was immediate and strong. We were two 

Libras vibing, each of us one half of the 

same Libra scale. I told her about the 

accident and my injuries and she said four 

words that would push me through some 

of the toughest challenges then and now: 

“You can do this.” 

In the spirit of full disclosure, at the start 

Just a few years ago, this pose would 

have been impossible. Words from 

my yoga instructor helped make this 

happen: “You can do this.” 

of YTT I was not only injured but 

overweight as well. To say that the 

physical aspect of training was a challenge 

would be an understatement. In my head, 

I’d pictured a nice slow vinyasa class with 

a lot of deep breathing. The reality was a 

much more intense (and hot) Power Flow 

class. Even though I’ve given birth four 

times and spent nearly 20 years on active 

duty in the Air Force, I can honestly say 

I’ve never pushed my body harder. 

Nevertheless, she persisted. I think back 

on all the days I wanted to quit, the days I 

was hyper-aware of just how many 

muscles it takes to roll over in bed, the 

times I actually shed tears on my mat and 

through it all, I could hear Megan’s voice in 

my head saying, “you can do this.” I’d also 

hear “KeOnte, pull your belly in” A LOT. 

Many times I wanted to respond, “Girl, I 

am! I’m just fat!” but even thinking it took 

more energy than I had. 

Thankfully I had a much easier time with 

the history and philosophy section of 

training. Even now I can rattle off the 

yamas and niyamas (and their meanings) 

like the lyrics to my favorite song. As we 

were studying the eight limbs of yoga (the 

guidelines on how to live a purposeful life), 

one in particular stuck out for me: 

pratyahara - withdrawal of the senses. 

‘This is a thing??’, I wondered. Teach me, 

Yoda. Of all the eight limbs, this one spoke 

to my heart the loudest. It became my 

personal challenge. 

At the end of every class, I would work 

on withdrawing all my senses during 

corpse pose. Later on I realized I was still 

chasing that one moment from my 

accident where I’d felt absolute peace; the 

moment where I was formed. During the 

rest of our training, I would incorporate 

pratyahara into my life off the mat as well. 

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned 

with fully practicing yoga is that no part of 

it is easy initially. Everything requires you 

to be fully present and in the moment. If 

you forget to breathe or don’t keep your 

eyes on your drishti (focal point), you’ll be 

thrown out of your practice. At best, you 

reset your focus, take a deep breath, and 

begin again. At worst, you fall down. If 

that happens you get up, find your drishti, 

take a deep breath, and start again. In the 

beginning, I had to start by focusing solely 

on the sound of my own voice. 

Coincidentally, this was also an issue in my 

real life. Anytime you try to consciously 

create a moment of stillness, your mind 

will become active and resist. Simply 

acknowledge and observe any thoughts 

that enter your mind and let them go. The 

more I worked at it the easier it became to 

truly remove myself from the environment. 

Because of the trauma I carried, even from 

before the accident, I never knew what it 

was to feel connected to my body. 

Learning to withdraw into myself wasn’t 

just a new skill, it was a gift. It taught me 

to be fiercely protective of my whole self. 

After graduation, I felt confident and 

powerful. Then one day during a soul flow 

class, my left knee gave out. An injury 

that’s plagued me for years flared up in a 

new and vicious way. I was devastated. My 

dreams of teaching were over. How can I 

teach if I can’t practice? Those were the 

exact words I said to Megan after a 

disheartening doctor’s visit. True to form, 

she repeated the words that have become 

my mantra: you can do this. How, Megan? I 

need my knees to do everything but 

corpse pose. By coming to class and 

pulling back to 50% or even less. That’s 

exactly what I did. I went back to class full 

of fear but also determination and 

intention. The knee injury caused me to 

lose my drishti and I’d fallen. It was time to 

get back up, find my focus, take a deep 

breath, and begin again. When the voices 

of doubt start to become louder than my 

own, I go back to the place of silence and 

find the strength I need to continue. It 

doesn’t get any easier but I consistently 

get stronger. 

One of the most important lessons I’ve 

learned through practicing yoga is that it 

teaches us how to ‘show up’ for ourselves 

and the people in our lives, despite our 

reluctance. We learn to connect to our 

breath to move through things that are 

difficult. We become quite adept at going 

to that place inside to find the will and the 

power to endure what’s ahead. We learn 

to surrender to stillness and reach 

pratyahara. It may not feel good at first 

but you’re strong and you can do this. 

Deep inhale in, deep exhale out. Beautiful 

job, yogis. Thank you for sharing this 

space and this journey with me. The light 

and love in me sees and honors the light 

and love in you. Namaste. 


arts+entertainment 

COCO 

PERU 


SHINE ON, 


story by Miss Mothie | photos by Peter Palladino 

How does one begin to write 

about someone so writerly as 

Coco Peru? 

If you are a long-time fan of 

Coco, you’ll get where she and 

I are coming from. If you are 

just meeting Coco, then allow 

me the honor of introducing 

her to the stage of your heart 

and imagination. And if you 

ARE Coco Peru, girl prepare to 

blush. 

A theatrical child from the 

Bronx bloomed on the silver 

screen and became canonized 

through her wit and beauty 

into the super gay American 

imagination and heart. 

Through performances, 

appearances, activism, 

and literally the best 

YouTube channel ever, 

Coco Peru has 

continued to shift the 

world and shift our 

perspectives on humor, 

love, and drag. 

Her crafting of a show is 

keen. Meticulous. And to say 

the least, impressive. When 

booking a show she spends 

three months writing the script 

and practicing. 

“People see my suitcase and 

see how organized I am. Or 

when I give my script to the 

tech person - and they’re like 

‘Wait, you have a script?’ 

- and then they realize Oh my 

god she’s got this down 

word for word. And the 

show is the same every 

single beat, boom boom 

boom.” 

We were both out of 

drag for our meeting. 

She appeared tidy and 

together, though 

warmed by the 

California heat. I had a 

hickey on my neck 

and flour on my 

glasses from baking 

earlier. She was 

polite as to not 

mention either. 

[We spoke over 

video call.] 

Coco’s image 

was burned 

into the American imagination 

in movies such as To Wong 

Foo, Trick, and Girls Will Be 

Girls, but she was burned into 

my imagination as a young 

lonely gay kid. I was never 

exposed to much film growing 

up. YouTube was my comedic 

education instead. I can’t 

remember when I first came to 

know of Coco. It seems, in my 

memory, she was always there. 

This sarcastic comfort. 

Whether playing Grand Theft 

Auto 5 or perusing markets for 

panettone, Coco could be 

summoned to brighten any 

grim morning before a barista 

job or any night of finals. 

When I asked her where her 

layered and complex sense of 

sarcasm comes from she said, 

“When you are younger and 

you are living outside that box 

- it’s terrifying, but then it also 

allows you to become the 

observer (and so I became this 

observer). I also grew up 

around a lot of funny people in 

my neighborhood. And my 

parents have a lot of funny 

friends that I used to imagine 

were celebrities because they 

reminded me of the people 

that I loved on television. So 

this sense of comedic timing 

was developed. But I was also 

deeply obsessed with Bea 

Arthur as a kid (and so there 

weren’t a lot of distractions in 

the 70’s; you were either 

playing outside or you were 

inside watching your favorite 

TV shows). With Bea Arthur 

there was a wit and honestly it 

was a craft that these people 

had worked years on. So I was 

absorbing their craft. And then 

developing through years in 

college and – even in high 

school – my craft.” 

I’ve always identified with 

Coco. Until we spent some 

time together, I was never sure 

just how much so. She’s an 

independent and layered 

aspiration. Her talents for 

writing and delivering 

monologues aren’t paralleled 

by many. The sharp tongue 

and the sharp sense of 

goodness. 

“I grew up on a small island 

in the Bronx, City Island, very 

nautical, lots of boats, 

everybody knew each other’s 

business, working class 

neighborhood – Dad worked 

as a truck driver and mom 

worked when we needed 

money. And so it was simple, 

but we got by. But struggled. 

Had some privileges as well. 

But being gay in that kinda 

neighborhood at that time 

which I was born in – ‘65 so 

we’re talking about the first 10 

years of my life – it was not 

easy being an effiminate little 

boy. And even though I wore 

boy clothes and had a short 

haircut, I was mistaken for 

being a girl all the time.” 

Even early in life, people 

could sense the glitter in 

Coco’s spirit. She continued, 

“The bullying was 

devastating for me. Early on I 

had a sense that I was very 

special. My ‘otherness’ made 

me feel very special. I knew I 

was different from other kids 

and I was happy about it. And 

then as I realized that 

difference, that otherness, was 

going to make my life 

miserable and it was a bad 

thing, – it was devastating.” 

That specialness is 

something many of us across 

the queer diaspora can 

connect with. To grow up 

feeling freaky and somehow 

transmute that feeling into art 

and success. 

But there is much more to 

Coco. A sense of warmth 

cultivated through her image 

and audience. Though oft 

perturbed as a character, there 

is a lovingness that shines 

through Coco. 

“When you walk out on 

stage and the spotlight hits 

you, you’ve entered this other 

realm of ‘you’re on the spot. 

You have to deliver.’ There’s no 

turning back. You’ve taken 

that leap of faith and so you 

have no other choice – there’s 

no choice now – you have to 

deliver. And lo and behold, you 

do. And that is how people 

should enter every day.” 

I remarked about the peace 

of the stage, and the 

sometimes addictive natural of 

the spotlight, Coco said, “The 


space of the stage puts you in 

the moment. It’s how we’re 

supposed to live every day of 

our lives. In the present. That’s 

why it’s addictive and 

dangerous, too. Some people 

only feel alive when they’re on 

the stage; you’ve got to learn 

to bring some of that into your 

everyday life...That’s why 

sometimes I would go out in 

full drag – into the world. I 

would go food shopping in 

drag or do my chores, stop at 

the post office then I’ve gotta 

go here and I would do it in full 

drag because it keeps me very 

present. I’m aware of my 

surroundings, I’m just 

hyperaware. When people are 

reacting to you, you are 

hyperaware of yourself. And 

suddenly your average 

ordinary day of just doing 

chores becomes very magical. 

I love it.” Coco says, “I love it.” 

I catch a sly glint in her eyes. I 

can almost see all of those tiny 

stories she created in that 

look. All the people she’s 

talked to. 

Coco says that some of the 

moments brought her into the 

creation of her stage act and 

persona, and while many 

moments are magical, others 

are born from discomfort and 

a feeling of being lost. 

“There was so much rage in 

that room and infighting and 

government wasn’t doing 

anything, and as a young 

person who was just dealing 

with my sexuality and coming 

out – it was way too much for 

my brain to even be in that 

room. And I left so sad 

because I thought, I’m not big 

enough to take that on. But I 

thought, what do I do well? I’m 

really good at telling stories. 

And I’m really good at making 

people who don’t think they 

like me end up liking me just 

by being myself and telling my 

story. 

“So I decided I’m going to 

own it. I’m going to do drag, 

gonna be totally honest, 

gonna tell autobiographical 

stories, and I’m gonna change 

the world by making the 

audience look at me and think 

they can’t relate to me 

because of the drag or 

whatever they perceive that to 

be and then by the end of the 

show they are gonna forget 

that it’s a man wearing a dress 

and they are going to be 

totally invested in my story. 

And that’s how you change 

people.” 

I myself, have had similar 

experiences. I believe that 

sometimes drag can be a way 

for certain (ones) of us to 

express a second self that 

never got any love or attention 

or magic from the world 

previously. I felt very shaken 

by Coco’s story. 

After that, the conversation 

meandered and became more 

intimate. Our mothers came 

up. Coco explained to me that 

her Mother had come into 

being a true ally, and at 94, 

remains a tremendous source 

of love and support. 

“My mother had a pair of 

fuzzy slippers that I loved 

because they were like a shoe. 

And I used to love to sneak 

into my mother’s bedroom and 

put on her earrings and then 

shake my head so I could hear 

them make that noise – that 

clinking – and she had 

beautiful scarves and I used to 

take the scarves out and wrap 

them around my head or let 

them hang over my arms. I’d 

wear my favorite blanket or 

towel on my head with 

a baseball 

cap to 

hold it 

on so 

that I 

would have 

long ‘hair’. And I 

always made sure 

to take a mental 

photograph of her 

drawer. So I knew 

exactly where to put 

things back... 

“What’s funny now is 

my mother is like ‘you 

like this ring, here take it.’ 

She’s my biggest fan! My 

mother always says, ‘I’m 

so lucky to have a gay 

child. Every parent 

should have a gay child,’ 

and by gay she means 

the whole rainbow. 

One time I asked her, 

“why do you like gay 

people so much?” And she 

said, “Honey, they notice the 

details.” 

And notice the details we 

do, Mamma Peru. 

If you notice all the details of 

Coco Peru, a story unfolds. 

“I told my Mother once, ‘I’m 

giving up Coco’ and she said 

‘oh no no – you better be good 

to Coco because she’s been 

very good to you,” and I 

thought, you know that’s true. 

I need to start being better to 

Coco. And my husband tells 

me to remember why I created 

Coco in the first place. And as 

soon as I get back to the core 

of why I created this character, 

all the comparisons and show 

business, all of that stuff kinda 

disappears when I get back to 

why I’ve created Coco, which 

was to change the world.” 

Amidst all of the writerly 

and actorly craft, and nuclear 

work ethic, there is something 

else. There is a cool girl who 

over and over and over has 

changed the world. From the 

monologue in Trick about eye 

irritation, to raising 

tremendous amounts of 

money through her activism as 

a friend to all. 

“When I see someone like Lil 

Nas X being self-expressed 

starting with this brooding 

kind of performance style, and 

now he’s flaming it up and 

shaking his hips a bit more, it 

just lights my fire because this 

is everything that I’ve worked 

for. This kid being able to be 

himself. And the more people 

push back on him the more he 

shoves it in their face. That is 

drag!” 

As an artist who has 

watched and listened to and 

emulated Coco at many a 

dinner table, I found myself 

starstruck during our time 

together. Her philosophical, 

sassy (and utterly dear) way of 

being goes far deeper than the 

flip and tone of her wig. A 

dazzling, irrepressible 

presence, there is something 

warm in Coco Peru’s eyes that 

never leaves. A kindness and 

sense of humanity that has 

inspired loyal fans the world 

over. 

An American treasure and 

an inspiration. Shine on Miss 

Coco Peru! 



AFFIRMATIVE 

WAYS TO TALK 

TO YOURSELF 

by Ray Rico 

We are always our own 

worst critics and oftentimes 

can be most critical of our 

actions. The way we manage 

those critiques and how that 

voice in our head guides us 

can sometimes be 

encouraging – and sometimes 

not. 

These thoughts are valid 

intellectual insights to our own 

true self. The way we talk to 

ourselves can either tear us 

down or build us up. Over the 

past year, I’ve learned to focus 

on growth and to motivate my 

actions by encouragement. 

How good are you to 

yourself? 

I’ll bet there’s a similar voice 

in your head that can be 

counterproductive. It may say 

things like, “I can’t do this,” 

“I’m falling apart.” Or, “This is 

simply just too much for me to 

manage.” When we serve 

ourselves detractor 

statements, it can be very 

discouraging and limiting. 

But why? We manage 

to meet the needs of so 

many other aspects in 

life. Like your job, your 

partner, your pets, your 

children. Why not allow 

ourselves the same 

respect that we serve 

others when we speak to 

them? 

The fact is we are 

experiencing it. There are 

ways to train yourself to 

rethink how that voice in 

your head guides you. 

Start noticing how you 

handle things and 

understand the things you tell 

yourself. Choosing positive 

words improves mindset and 

performance. 

Here are a few tips to help 

you. 

• Avoid negative or 

discouraging language. 

• Choose positive and 

encouraging words. 

• Focus on what is possible. 

Be realistic with yourself. 

• Suggesting solutions or 

alternatives also is a game 

changer. 

• Stay positive. 

At the end of the day if you 

think you can you can. If you 

think you can’t, you’re 

probably right too. You have 

the power. 

NOW 

YOU TRY 

These statements 

will get you started: 

I am doing my best. 

I am proud of myself. 

I am worthy of good things. 

I am inspired by… 

I can do this. 

I am enough. 

I am heard and I matter. 

I am committed to having 

a positive mindset. 

I love myself. 

I am learning 

valuable lessons everyday. 

I am allowed to make mistakes. 

I am human. 

I am in charge of today and 

how I handle it. 


CROSSWORD 

TEMPORAL WARP 

ACROSS 

1 Start of a quote referencing 

temporal warp 

9 Gives out some queens, maybe 

14 Saint of Hitchcock movies 

15 Stan’s sidekick 

16 Wide open 

17 Cultural critic Edmund 

18 Singer Fure 

19 More of the quote 

21 Buck it, with “the” 

24 Lose oomph 

25 Keanu’s role in “The Matrix” 

26 Lyricist Gershwin and others 

28 Money back from Intl. Male 

30 End of the quote 

36 Alexander who was under Nixon 

37 Egypt and Syr., once 

38 Tickle pink 

40 Latina writer Castillo 

41 Gay and Lesbian Victory ___ 

43 Oklahoma native 

44 Playing taps, for example 

46 Become a tenant’s tenant 

47 Nobel prize winner John 

48 Start to climax 

49 “Game of Thrones” star and 

source of the quote 

53 Bottomless 

54 “Romeo and Juliet” and others 

56 Muse to George Chauncey 

57 Higher-learning org. 

58 Buffalo’s lake 

59 Sound like Harvey Fierstein 

60 First word from Robin 

61 Tony-winning musical 

DOWN 

1 Big tops, for example 

2 Merchant’s partner 

3 Cock and bull 

4 Putting out 

5 “___ Spartacus!” 

6 Bombay title 

7 Trivia 

8 Checks for STDs 

9 Violet of “Downton Abbey,” e.g. 

10 K-12 

11 Adjust, as car wheels 

12 Like a ballerina 

13 Take care of 

20 Pinker, to meat-eaters 

22 It may come before long 

23 Spring month for Vivien 

27 Wounded by a wasp 

29 “Querelle” director 

30 Moby Dick chaser 

31 Half of Mork’s good-bye 

32 Conclusion by Alex Landi 

33 Was in bed with 

34 Eat it 

35 “Bus Stop” playwright 

39 NYPD rank 

41 Porgy and bass 

42 Disconnect, as a trailer 

43 Really queer, to heteros 

45 Portable PC 

46 How skinny jeans fit 

48 The least bit 

49 Room for Frida 

50 Ending with switch 

51 Land of Sinead O’Connor 

52 Strap on a stallion 

53 Remote target 

55 Go down 

SOLUTION IS ON PAGE 41 


life 


ON CLOVERS 

AND GOLDFISH 

story and photo illustration by Moth Moth Moth 

No matter where you go in 

Memphis, odds are you have 

been in the room with a certain 

tattoo. About the size of a silver 

dollar, an image of a content 

goldfish in a bag tied with string. 

A lucky goldfish. 

Clover Faulhaber, oft referred 

to by their screen name 

@straydogthey, has been on 

everyone’s lips and skin around 

the 901 for years. 

If the name is unfamiliar then 

most certainly the style and 

impish wit of their drawings on 

people’s skin will prove 

unforgettable. 

I bring a modicum of bias into 

the writing of this piece. Clover 

and I have been friends for a 

long time. When they came to 

sit for an interview it was a 

conversation filled with Saturn 

returns, anime references, and 

an unprofessional amount of 

giddy giggling on my side. 

The first time I got poked by 

Clover was about four years 

ago. I had about three other 

tattoos from other artists. In 

that first session I was taken by 

how different Clover’s energy 

was. The thoughtfulness of the 

flash tattoo designs on the wall. 

The candor moving between 

silence and conversation. What 

struck me most was the quality 

of the scratch. Crisp black line 

work with subtle shadows. 

Hyper intentional. I thought their 

eyes might burn through my 

arm. Always with a gentle 

strength behind the pain of the 

tattoo gun. By the time we 

finished it was like the mark had 

always been there. I hardly bled. 

As a draftsperson, Clover’s 

drawing talent is paramount to 

their successful and remarkable 

style. Cultivated through a 

lifetime of scribbles, media 

consumption, and 9AM art 

school critiques. Furthermore 

their talent has developed to 

match their tattooing career. A 

propensity for the hand drawn, 

the dear, the clever, and the 

clean are all present. 

Clover spent some time with 

me to catch up and share 

portfolios of designs from the 

past few years. Every design an 

idea that landed on someone’s 

skin. A moment that Clover 

acted as a satellite between 

another human and their own 

epidermis. 

It begged the question: “Can 

a tattoo be a source of 

comfort?” 

Clover’s answer was simple, 

“People change in the chair.” 

A discussion about 

permanence and intention 

ensued. Anything can be lasered 

off, but it doesn’t change the 

fact that time, intention, and 

pain were spent to inject an 

image into the skin. 

Some folks need a tattoo to 

act as a magic spell. A release 

from something. An image to 

make you feel stronger. 

Sometimes a good luck charm. 

But there are plenty of people 

that show up and just want to 

have an experience. Which is 

equally valuable. 

This line of thinking lead 

Clover and I into discussions of 

Friday the 13th tattoos they have 

designed over the years. 

To clue in the clueless, every 

Friday the 13th tattoo shops and 

artists will run specials on 

themed tattoo designs. Images 

of black cats, ladders, and 

horseshoes come to mind. A mix 

up of good luck and bad luck 

motifs. 

But here is where we get to 

explore Clover’s mind corners a 

little more. 

The idea of not using a sad 

face to express sadness was 

huge for Clover. Using objects 

to stand in for emotions was 

cooler and delivered emotion 

and message with a crisper wit. 

There is also a theme of warm 

yet sardonic wit, they reference 

“The Phantom Tollbooth” as an 

introduction to sardonic wit. 

Clover’s images are clean, 

clever, and often complex. Also 

super f**king cool. 

One tattoo was a three leafed 

clover with a bloom subtly 

creating the number 13 from an 

unremarkable clover. Thus 

making it feel lucky in its own 

way. 

Another was a mysterious 

envelope with chains below it. 

“Oh, that one is chain mail.” 

Clover remarked. 

“That’s the most cursed 

image I’ve ever encountered.” I 

replied 

At the bottom of the page I 

found something familiar, the 

previously mentioned goldfish 

tattoo. Something about the 

image really does feel lucky. A 

goldfish in a bag is a hopeful 

image. A prayer that the fish will 

get home safe and into a happy 

habitat and live with you for a 

long happy life. The luck of 

bringing a smaller life in your 

orbit. Luck is a thing you feed 

fish flakes too. It set my 

imagination on fire, 

Clover made the remark 

about this one, “I’ve done that 

one a hundred times, I’m happy 

to do it a hundred more.” 

I find myself longing for a 

goldfish. 

An intrinsically magical nature 

is carried through the lines 

created by Clover. A spell for the 

skin. 

Clover is now at a more free 

and independent point in their 

career than ever before. Their 

journey has been one of scrappy 

determination behind the 

scenes, all the while filling our 

brains with starkly darkly clever 

images. 

To say that Clover has 

changed the stylistic and 

cultural imagination of tattooing 

in the Mid-South is one thing, 

but I think I would like to go 

farther. 

I believe that Clover is an 

archetype for the future. From 

they way they lovingly draft 

work to the elbow grease that it 

takes to get the ink fused to skin 

to the bravery and candor it 

takes to negotiate their own 

name and space. A true genius 

if ever I’ve come to know one. 



Local salon spa looks 

to ancient organic ingredients 

for wellness – and a better Earth 

by Scot Robinson, Owner, Pavo Salon 

Pavo is a locally owned AVEDA Lifestyle 

Salon created by co-owners Scot Robinson 

and Shawn McGhee. Serving Memphis for 

more than 20 years, they are committed to 

bringing wellness through the Art of Hair 

combined with the balance of Skin and 

Body. Pavo partnered with AVEDA in 1997. 

Looking to separate themselves from the 

typical salon visit, they aligned themselves 

with a company that shared values that 

were important to them. 

Enter AVEDA. The mission at AVEDA is 

to care for the world, from the products 

they make to the ways in which they give 

back to society. AVEDA strives to set an 

example for environmental leadership and 

responsibility, not just in the world of 

beauty, but around the world. 

AVEDA’S AYURVEDIC ROOTS 

AVEDA’S earliest roots lie in ayurveda, 

the Indian healing tradition based on the 

knowledge of life and the 

interconnectedness of all things. It has 

been proven, over 5,000 years, that 

treating the whole person leads to greater 

balance and well-being, so Aveda 

considers the effects of their products not 

only on hair or skin, but on body, mind and 

emotion. 

HORST RECHELBACHER, FOUNDER 

Following a retreat in India in 1970, 

founder Horst Rechelbacher (1941 - 2014) 

integrated Ayurveda in his lifestyle and his 

salon business model. He adopted a 

holistic thinking, the belief that individual 

beauty is directly linked to the beauty of 

the world around us. His were ideas that 

would revolutionize the beauty industry. 

“We are the earth,” he said. “We are soil. 

We are water. We are everything. So go 

organic if you can. So become a farmer. 

Grow in your own house. Grow peppermint 

and make your own tea. Celebrate life.” 

Aveda salons were born in 1978 with the 

vision to bring beauty professionals 

botanical products that would be good for 

them, their guests, and the Earth and its 

communities. Horst’s foresight is a 

testament to how far ahead of his time he 

was, and although no longer living, his 

legacy lives on in countless ways, from the 

signature ritual of a neck and shoulder 

massage that Aveda salons are known for, 

to an ecologically-minded way of doing 

business, one that celebrates companies 

with a conscience. Most importantly, Horst 

taught us that: “Every day presents every 

one of us with the opportunity to create 

positive effects. Even the simplest, 

seemingly insignificant choices we make in 

our daily lives—what to eat, what to wear, 

what to use on our bodies and in our 

homes—have a ripple effect that reaches 

far beyond us personally.” 

THE FIVE TENETS OF AVEDA 

ANIMALS AND AVEDA 

Aveda is a cruelty-free brand. We do not 

test on animals and never ask others to do 

so on our behalf. Our products are 

“people-tested” 

INGREDIENTS 

At Aveda, The Art and Science of Pure 

Flower and Plant Essences, we believe that 

Nature is the best beauty artist of all. This 

is why we continually strive to increase our 

use of naturally derived ingredients 

whenever possible. 

SCIENCE OF AROMAOLOGY 

We believe every beauty product should 

make you feel as beautiful as you look. 

That’s why aroma is at the heart of every 

Aveda experience. To help promote your 

sense of well-being, our products feature 

aromas formulated through the art and 

science of aromaology. Created in our 

Botanical Aroma Lab, our Pure-fume 

Aromas are artful blends of flower and 

plant extracts distilled to their very 

essence, their spirit, to awaken your senses 

with nature’s power. Experience them 

yourself; your sensory journey awaits. Only 

at Aveda. 

RESPONSIBLE PACKAGING 

We are proud to have been the first 

beauty company using 100% post 

consumer recycled PET. Now more than 

85% of our skin care and hair styling PET 

bottles and jars contain 100% post 

consumer recycled materials. With every 

package we develop, we’re mindful of our 

environmental footprint and work to 

minimize our packaging and maximize our 

use of recyclable and post consumer 

recycled materials. 

RESPONSIBLE MANUFACTURING 

Aveda supports the development of 

renewable wind energy to help offset our 

carbon footprint over time. We are proud 

to be the first beauty company 

manufacturing products with 100% wind 

power (in our primary facility). 

When you choose Pavo you are 

choosing much more than a great haircut 

or color. We are a Salon Today Top 200 

salon six times over. We have been 

recognized for our continued growth, our 

philanthropy, our technology, our 

compensation and benefits. We are a top 

100 AVEDA Salon in North America. We 

are committed annually to raising 

awareness and money for access to 

CLEAN WATER. Aveda guests, artists, 

employees and leaders have raised nearly 

$65M since 1999 for local and global 

organizations. 

We define wellness by creating a 

sustainable business, by supporting 

community, by surrounding ourselves with 

a team of diverse individuals, by having 

authentic experiences with our guest. Last 

but not least, using the most innovative 

and environmentally conscious products in 

the industry. 

Visit pavosalon.com for a complete 

listing of our services. 

Page 36 / focuslgbt.com / JUL+AUG / BODY BEAUTIFUL 


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A BRIEF GUIDE TO CREATING 

AT-HOME WORKOUTS 

by Nikki R. Veit 

SHUTTERSTOCK 

When’s the last time you 

walked into an actual gym and 

took a group class or lifted 

some weights on your own? If 

you’re thinking “March 2020,” 

you’re not alone. In fact, 

maybe you can specifically 

pinpoint that moment you got 

an email from your local gym 

that told you it was closing its 

doors indefinitely. Maybe you 

were someone who frantically 

worried about how you were 

going to stay on top of your 

weekly workout routine or 

maybe you were entirely too 

busy focusing on taking care 

of your children, let alone 

yourself, to even think about 

the gym. As a full-time 

personal trainer, my first 

thought was, “damn, how am I 

going to train my clients?” I 

was less concerned about 

keeping my actual job and 

more concerned about the 

physical and mental well-being 

of my clients because being 

someone’s trainer is so much 

more than telling them how to 

work out. 

As soon as the pandemic 

started sweeping the globe, I 

knew I needed to come up with 

fast and creative ways to 

support my clients. 

Transitioning my business from 

in-person sessions to virtual 

sessions was a no-brainer, but 

convincing my clients to do the 

same took some convincing. I 

knew that most people would 

push back on the idea of 

working out at all but I also 

knew they needed something 

to help them maintain some 

semblance of a normal routine, 

not to mention the famous 

saying, “exercise gives you 

endorphins, endorphins make 

you happy…”. 

When it comes to working 

with my clients, I’m not just an 

endorphin dealer. I take it upon 

myself to educate and 

empower my clients to feel 

confident in their abilities. 

When the pandemic hit, I knew 

I had a unique obstacle to 

overcome with my clients 

because I ultimately wanted to 

teach them that they can 

always workout from home. Of 

course, I heard the line, “I’m 

stuck at home and have zero 

gym equipment, there’s no way 

I could workout here” time and 

time again, but what they were 

failing to realize at the time is 

that gym equipment is all 

around them. Anything can be 

a weight: detergent bottles, 

heavy pots (especially when 

filled with water), milk gallons, 

even chairs and footstools! 

Furthermore, furniture makes 

for great surfaces to do 

push-ups, rows, squats, and 

plank variations. I suddenly 

realized the space wasn’t the 

obstacle, the mindset to 

workout was the obstacle. Cue 

the “ding, ding, ding” as I 

launched into re-educating my 

clients on how to transform 

their home into a fully 

equipped gym. 

By writing this article, I want 


to bring that education to the 

page. What it takes to write an 

effective and efficient workout 

from home starts with knowing 

what each exercise’s purpose 

is and how to strategically 

place it in a workout. Once you 

have the workout written out, 

it’s time to get creative with 

the furniture and objects you 

have within reach, and then… 

get to work! Let’s start from 

the top. 

I like to break down all the 

exercises I come across into 5 

unique movement patterns 

(think of these as “exercise 

categories”) because it allows 

me to focus on each exercise’s 

purpose and it helps me to 

write better programs for my 

clients. Not to mention, 

everyone loves a category— 

without them, we’d never be 

able to separate our work life 

from home life, and that’s 

gotten increasingly more 

difficult in this yearlong 

#workfromhome lifestyle. The 

5 movement patterns consist 

of press, pull, knee-dominant, 

hip-dominant, and core 

exercises. Now let’s break 

down each category by 

description and exercise 

examples. 

Press movements are upper 

body focused exercises and 

consist of your chest press, 

shoulder press, and push-up 

variations. Anytime you are 

pressing resistance away from 

your body, you are performing 

a pressing movement. You can 

press away resistance from 

both vertical and horizontal 

angles (think of your shoulder 

presses as vertical and your 

chest presses as horizontal). 

You can also include tricep 

exercises in this category as 

you are typically pressing 

weight away from you when 

doing tricep work. 

Pull movements are the 

other side of your upper body 

movements and include your 

row and pulldown variations. 

The opposite of press 

movements, pull movements 

are performed when you are 

pulling resistance toward you. 

You can also pull resistance 

from both vertical and 

horizontal angles (think of lat 

pulldowns or chin-ups as 

vertical and dumbbell rows as 

horizontal). You can also 

include bicep exercises in this 

category as we are typically 

curling weight toward us when 

performing bicep exercises. 

Knee-dominant movements 

are the meat of your lower 

body movements and consist 

of your squat and lunge 

variations. Any exercise that 

requires full flexion of the knee 

joint (aka bending your knees 

to their fullest extent) is 

included in this category. But 

be careful! When I say “knee 

joint,” I don’t want you 

over-loading your knees and 

causing pain in that area, I 

specifically mean to bend your 

knees and load the resistance 

onto your quad muscles that 

are on the front of your thighs 

above your knees. 

Hip-dominant movements 

are also lower body 

movements and are your 

deadlift and Kettlebell swing 

variations—you can even 

include some jumping 

movements in this category. 

Consider this category the 

opposite of the knee-dominant 

movements: anytime we are 

hinging the hips back (literally 

moving the pelvis backward in 

space), we are loading weight 

into your hips, glutes, and 

hamstring—opposite to 

loading weight into your quads 

and knees. 

Finally, we have everyone’s 

favorite category: core 

movements! These are your 

plank variations and various 

rotational/anti-rotational 

exercises and are most often 

performed with just 

bodyweight. However what a 

lot of people don’t realize is 

that in order to perform any of 

the movements listed above, 

you must brace your core! 

Bracing your core, aka tensing 

your ab muscles as though you 

are about to be punched in the 

gut, helps resist force or weight 

when performing exercises. 

Your core is also what helps 

maintain your posture in most 

movements, for example 

squatting a heavyweight with 

proper technique simply can 

not be performed without 

bracing the core as hard as 

possible. Think of this the next 

time you squat ;-) 

For maximal efficiency of 

your time and workouts, 

full-body workouts are the way 

photo courtesy Nikki R. Veit 

I get core and lower body engagement with a simple squat; 

adding a weight increases the difficult for my entire body. 

to go. They work every muscle 

in the body and you can get 

great results by doing fullbody 

workouts 3-4/week. Now 

that we’ve broken down each 

of the 5 movement patterns, 

let’s see how they would fit 

into a full-body workout: 

1a. Squats (knee-dominant) 

1b. Rows (pull) 

1c. Plank (core) 

x 3 rounds, resting 60s 

between movements 

2a. Deadlifts (hipdominant) 

2b. Push-ups (press) 

2c. Plank (core) 

x 3 rounds, resting 60s 

between movements 

Boom! There’s a full-body 

workout, certainly not the only 

one but one of my go-tos. 

Notice how I alternated the 

lower body and upper body 

movements and always finish 

the circuit with a core exercise. 

By picking one movement 

from each category, you 

always ensure you are using 

every muscle in the body, and 

core work can always be 

doubled. Lower body exercises 

typically move more weight 

and recruit bigger muscles 

than upper body exercises, so 

they usually go first due to the 

amount of energy required. 

Using this template, you can 

simply pick different exercises 

from the 5 movement 

categories and create a 

plethora of different workouts. 

Get creative with using 

different household items as 

weights or simply use your 

bodyweight! 

I hope this guide helps 

resolve the obstacles around 

working out from home. 

Sometimes the simplicity of 

having a plan and reasons for 

its design is enough to go by. 

Be confident in your mindset 

and space and trust that you 

can create full gym workouts 

from the floor of your living 

room. 



Mental Health: 

Glow from the Inside 

by Robin Beaudoin Ownby 

with Beth Duke Rushing, Licensed Professional Counselor, LPC-MHSP, NCC 

Thanks to recent vaccine 

success in controlling the 

COVID-19 virus, work and social 

ventures are slowly returning to 

“new normal.” Many Americans 

struggled with the anxiety and 

uncertainness of the pandemic, 

and now emerging into the 

public is causing social anxiety. 

Relationships changed; people 

learned more about themselves 

with time to focus inward over 

the past year. Memphis 

therapist Beth Rushing, like 

many mental health 

professionals, has seen an 

uptick in business since 2020. 

“Straight from COVID anxiety 

to social anxiety,” Rushing 

describes her workload’s 

transformation. 

A lifelong Memphian, 

Rushing’s midtown office is 

located at Broad and Collins, in 

a repurposed home her group 

of independent therapists calls 

“Autumn House.” She is 

grateful for her new location, 

which allows her to serve as an 

ally to the LGBTQ+ community. 

“The reason I went into 

counseling is because I love 

people. I love getting to know 

them, hearing their stories. It’s 

exciting to see people do hard 

things, get through to the other 

side and have a great story to 

tell, and feel good about their 

choices,” says Rushing. “Some 

things are difficult and sad. But 

it’s great to be in that moment 

with those people, to know 

they aren’t going through it 

alone. Seeking community and 

support is the opposite of 

weakness. I love my job, and 

I’m thankful to be on this side 

of COVID-19.” 

Rushing’s focus clientele is 

people who have survived 

trauma, specializing in 

codependency, traumatic 

relationship, family issues, 

religious trauma, interpersonal 

conflict. She is also qualified to 

work with people who are 

transitioning. “I have a fairly 

high clientele of LGBTQ+ 

people. Many have experienced 

adverse circumstances. I treat 

adults, 18+. I can use EMDR 

(eye movement desensitization 

and reprocessing), allowing us 

to desensitize the physical and 

emotional response to 

traumatic memories. I also do 

experiential bodywork, such as 

breath work in groups.” 

Rushing answers some 

common questions about 

therapy: 

To whom do you recommend 

therapy? 

Anybody and everybody. My 

biggest piece of advice is that 

going to therapy doesn’t have 

to be only in a time of crisis. Of 

course, one can and should, 

but sometimes you’ve made a 

difficult choice or have a 

difficult relationship or issue 

with family. You take that to a 

therapist and you’re already 

used to the process of therapy 

so that when things do come 

up you have someone to call. 

Anybody can benefit from 

getting feedback from a 

professional, and some people 

do it just to be a better version 

of who they already are. 

What should someone expect 

in a first session? 

Most therapists will send you 

email paperwork to fill out, 

history. Asking questions about 

your goals for therapy, the 

priority of what you want to 

work on. Mostly it’s getting to 

know each other so the client 

can decide if they want to work 

with the therapist. It’s like an 

interview to see if you want to 

work with that therapist. Do 

they like your energy, the way 

you communicate, the way you 

ask questions. 

How does mental health affect 

a person’s physical health and 

pain? 

When we experience a 

traumatic event (major or 

minor), our body remembers 

things that our brain does not 

(fight, flight, or freeze), even 

when our brain doesn’t want to 

remember how that feels. Over 

time years of trauma can cause 

chronic stress, hormonal issues, 

tightness in your muscles, 

indigestion, stomach issues 

(your gut is your second brain). 

When we don’t address our 

trauma, the body holds it all in. 

It will manifest every which way. 

We use somatic/breath work to 

help address this. 

Tips for finding the right 

therapist? 

We refer in-house, to help 

find the right therapist for 

someone or a couple. I usually 

tell people that finding a 

therapist is a little like dating. 

You don’t go on a first date 

expecting to marry that person, 

so coming into the first session, 

you don’t have to go in with the 

mindset that you’re making a 

huge commitment to this 

person. You have every right to 

say, “that didn’t work for me, I 

need to go to somebody else.” I 

think the best way is by word 

of mouth- who your friends 

used and liked or didn’t like. On 

the web, Psychologytoday.com 

is where most independent 

therapists are listed, and 

prospective clients can reach 

us by phone or email and learn 

insurance information. It’s like a 

website about your practice. If 

you know anyone in the mental 

health community at all, usually 

they are willing to help connect 

the right therapist to the 

patient. 

How confidential is our 

session? 

100% protection with HIPAA. 

No information is shared 

outside of session. The only 

exception is potential harm to 

self or others or child/elder 

abuse, or if the patient signs a 

release to share with other 

medical personnel. 

Common LGBTQ+ issues that 

come up frequently? 

I find people come to me 

when they’re first coming out, 

asking how to tell people, etc. 

They may be religious and 

don’t want to lose their 

community or family, and 

sometimes they do. I help them 

create community through 

being a trusted person on their 

team- no matter what, giving 

practical first steps, and 

helping them find community. 

I’ll refer them to groups or find 

friends to support them and 

health care (chronic illness, HIV 

care, PrEP, doctor’s offices, 

getting people on medication, 

and getting them a solid 

psychiatric referral). In the last 

few years, I’ve been doing 

more LGBTQ+ couples’ 

counseling. There are things 

they have to navigate that 

straight couples don’t, and in a 

marginalized group, you will 

use word-of-mouth advice to 

find a trusted person. 

Rushing adds, “I love my job. 

It has informed every choice in 

my life. I feel grateful and it is 

also a lot of responsibility. My 

clients have been so resilient 

this last year. The human spirit 

has always blown me away. It’s 

so encouraging to see people 

already go through a difficult 

time in life and a global 

pandemic. 

Beth Rushing Counseling | Autumn House | 2610 Autumn Ave., 38112 

(901) 209-4795 | Counseling901@gmail.com 

Vaccinated patients may be seen in person. 


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ENERGY HEALING 

by Savannah Bearden | photos courtesy of Healing Panther 

“Hey Savannah, what would 

your interest level be in 

covering a story on energy 

healers?” 

This email from Focus 

popped into my inbox on a 

recent Monday morning, one I 

would politely describe as “the 

Monday-iest of f#@ing 

Mondays.” Work emails and 

texts were already going 

berserk, I had the rumblings of 

a migraine, and there was 

someone hammering very, 

very, very loudly on the 

wooden siding outside my 

window, as we were getting 

our house ready for a 

tremendously exciting, but 

tremendously sudden and 

stressful house move. I could 

best be described that 

morning as “manic AF” and 

“comically unshowered.” 

So I kind of surprised myself 

when I immediately responded 

back to this story request with 

an enthusiastic “yes!” knowing 

that I did not have the time nor 

the energy to take on yet 

another proverbial plate to 

spin. But I found myself 

intrigued to find out what 

exactly energy healing was 

and, quite frankly, see if it 

could help chill my ass out a 

little bit. 

I was soon contacted by 

Catherine Evans, a Reiki Master 

& Spiritual Intuitive and the 

founder of Healing Panther, a 

Reiki practice which recently 

opened on Summer Ave. 

Pronounced “ray-key,” Reiki is 

a Japanese energy-healing 

technique based on the 

principle that the practitioner 

can channel energy into the 

patient, to activate the natural 

healing processes of the body 

and restore mental and 

physical well-being. 

Fast forward to Friday and 

I’m walking into a building on 

Summer Avenue, one that I’ve 

driven by thousands of times, 

but never really noticed 

because it’s a 100% Generic 

Office Building. This building 

is the home of Healing Panther, 

where I was to receive a 

complimentary “soul 

coaching” session by Catherine 

herself. I’ll admit that the 

location initially threw me a 

bit—like, how can you get all 

“zen” in a fluorescently lit 

reception area that’s next door 

to a law firm? But the second I 

stepped into Healing Panther’s 

space, I felt truly transported. 

Stepping into Healing 

Panther almost feels like 

stepping into a small 

planetarium. The light is 

soothingly dim and there is 


astral music softly playing in 

the background—it’s almost 

womb-like. Catherine greeted 

me with such warmth and 

calmness that I was instantly 

aware of how sweaty and 

frazzled I was in comparison. 

But she instantly put me at 

ease, inviting me to take off my 

shoes and get comfortable so 

we could chat before the 

session began. Of course, my 

first question for her was: why 

the name Healing Panther? 

“Well, my first name is 

Catherine, but people call me 

Cat,” she explained. “And 

growing up, I didn’t have a 

huge backbone—I let people 

walk all over me. So I kinda 

thought of myself as like a 

kitten. But as I was growing my 

backbone, the image of a 

panther really came into my 

mind. My mentor had a statue 

of a panther on her altar, which 

represents strength. And just 

looking into its eyes just made 

me feel powerful. It made me 

feel like it helped grow my 

backbone because I saw 

myself in it.” 

Evans explains that she 

didn’t grow up spiritual or 

religious—quite the opposite, 

she said. 

“I actually was agnostic, 

almost atheist, at one point in 

time, like, I just thought that 

we were born and then we 

became worm food,” she 

laughed. “I didn’t believe in 

anything.“ 

That was until she met her 

mentor, Tara, and learned 

about energy for the first time. 

“She taught me to put my 

hands together and just rub 

them and be able to feel 

energy in between my hands. 

So when I did it, it just blew my 

mind because it was like—oh, 

wow, there’s, there’s something 

more to life than what I 

previously thought,” says 

Catherine. 

That’s when she began 

researching energy and ways 

to use it in her life. With a 

simple Google search, 

Catherine discovered Reiki and 

hungered to learn more. She 

then happened to meet a Reiki 

Master at a local metaphysical 

shop and begged the woman 

to teach her the technique. By 

2011, Catherine was a Reiki 

Master herself. When I asked 

Catherine what all is involved 

with a Reiki session, she 

suggested that we jump in and 

start the session. 

“I could tell you all day what 

I do. But when you feel it, that 

right there is gonna explain it 

all,” she said. 

She invited me to lay on the 

BioMat, a specialized amethyst 

heating pad that was draped 

across a massage table. As my 

body began to warm up on the 

BioMat, she shifted the lighting 

from “planetarium” to “I feel 

like I’m in actual space right 

now,” which honestly felt 

pretty magical. As she 

coached me through clearing 

my mind and becoming aware 

of my breathing, I realized just 

how much I hadn’t relaxed or 

been present with myself in 

god knows how long. I needed 

this. 

Catherine then asked me if I 

was comfortable with 

proceeding with our Reiki 

session. According to Healing 

Panther’s website, the 

purported benefits of Reiki 

include stress reduction, deep 

relaxation, and improved focus 

and since I was seeking all of 

those things, I gave an 

enthusiastic thumbs up to 

starting the session. She 

explained that Reiki can be 

done with touch or no-touch 

depending on my comfort 

level. I opted for touch. 

The physical and mental 

experience of the Reiki session 

is unique and one that I found 

surprisingly—but pleasantly— 

intense. Catherine began by 

talking to me about chakras, 

which are the seven main 

energy points in our bodies. 

She then placed her hands on 

my solar plexus chakra—the 

chakra that represents 

personal power, such as 

self-esteem and confidence— 

which was where she sensed 

the most energy blockage in 

me. While she kept her hands 

gently on my abdomen, she 

walked me through a guided 

meditation to help get to the 

root of this blockage. 

At first, I was anxious to let 

myself be this vulnerable, but I 

just leaned into it. The next 

thing I knew, tears of release 

and relief were streaming 

down the sides of my face. (A 

quick look at Healing Panther’s 

website will show you that this 

sort of reaction is not 

uncommon on Catherine’s 

table—there are many video 

testimonials that avow the 

exact same experience.) 

She then let me meditate on 

my own for a while, which 

allowed me to process what I 

was feeling and then very 

nearly fall asleep. By the end of 

the Reiki session, my body and 

brain were Jello. It felt 

AMAZING. 

When I finally managed to 

roll myself off the BioMat, we 

sat down and Catherine gave 

me a full assessment of what 

energy she had picked up 

during the Reiki session. I 

gotta say, it was pretty 

unbelievable how dead-on she 

was about the personal traits 

and events that may have led 

to this energy blockage she 

sensed. (Like, seriously, the 

woman could tell that I am a 

pathological perfectionist with 

family estrangement issues 

just by touching my stomach 

for a few minutes. WTF.) She 

then talked me through 

specific practices and 

meditations I could incorporate 

into my everyday life to 

continue to clear out these 

blockages. I’ve been doing 

these exercises for a few 

weeks now and I can definitely 

say that it’s made a noticeable 

difference in my ability to work 

through personal discomfort, 

frustration, or anxiety. 

If anything about my Healing 

Panther experience piques 

your interest, you’re in luck— 

Catherine offers a free BioMat 

session for first-timers. 

“Even for the non-believers, 

they don’t lose anything by 

coming to see me for the first 

time,” she says. “If you need a 

little bit of healing, a little bit of 

relaxation, any type of anxiety 

release.—and everybody does 

right now in this pandemic. All 

I need you to do is just step in 

this room. Because you don’t 

just feel my space. You feel 

me.” 

I like to think of myself as an 

“optimistic agnostic,” meaning 

that I have zero idea if there is 

cool stuff that exists outside of 

what I can see, but I sure as 

hell hope there is. That pretty 

much sums up how I feel about 

my experience at Healing 

Panther. I have no idea if it was 

the energy from Catherine’s 

hands that made my mind and 

heart open up more that day... 

but I really hope it was. 

Healing Panther 

3540 Summer Avenue. 

Visit healingpanther.com 

to make an appointment for a 

free consultation with 

Catherine. 



OPIOIDS 

vs. 

CHIROPRACTIC CARE 

...the most impactful studies show a 50% reduction 

in opioid use among patients getting chiropractic care, 

and patients who see a chiropractor are 30 times less 

likely to end up having back or neck surgery than if 

they don’t receive chiropractic care. 

by Sarah Hogan, Memphis Spine and Sport | photos bcourtesy of MSS 

It is safe to say that the 

general public’s awareness of 

health concerns has exploded 

over the past year. As Covid-19 

swept the world into chaos, all 

public health initiatives were 

forced to take a back seat and, 

as a result, time, attention, and 

resources have been drawn 

away from other health 

concerns. One of the most 

devastating public health 

threats that we continue to 

face is the raging opioid 

epidemic. According to CDC 

data, in 2019, 70,630 drug 

overdose deaths occurred in 

the U.S. Many Americans don’t 

appreciate the danger of this 

epidemic because drug 

overdose typically has a 

negative connotation. It is 

associated with lower socioeconomic 

status, or only 

affects certain populations that 

are more prone to having drug 

problems. Most people don’t 

appreciate the manner in which 

the American medical system 

is structured to manage pain is 

actually the root of the issue. 

The American Society of 

Addiction Medicine states that 

4 out of 5 heroin users started 

with prescription painkillers. 

There is a systemic flaw in 

which our medical system 

manages musculoskeletal 

issues (back/neck pain, 

headaches, etc.) that has 

allowed this opioid epidemic to 

fester to the point we are losing 

130+ Americans per day due to 

opioid overdose. 

To shed some light on this 

issue, let’s make sure we are on 

the same page about what 

opioids are, and how their 


usage came about. Opioid 

drugs are prescription 

painkiller narcotics. The most 

commonly prescribed opioids 

are hydrocodone, oxycodone, 

morphine, codeine, and 

fentanyl. The main nonprescription 

opioid is heroin. 

Prescription opioids serve a 

purpose for severe pain in 

emergency situations, surgical 

pain, and sometimes for 

cancer-related pain. However, 

what has spurred a majority of 

the opioid crisis is the 

acceptance and prevalence of 

opioid pain killers for 

musculoskeletal issues; mainly 

back pain and arthritis. A small 

degree of inappropriate 

utilization of opioids as a 

painkiller can be due to poor 

understanding of the dangers 

of the substance. It is the same 

reason methamphetamine was 

once readily available and used 

as a household stimulant, or 

cocaine was at one time 

prescribed for various medical 

ailments. 

The more alarming driver of 

opioid utilization is an absolute 

breakdown of the medical 

system and its management of 

chronic pain, especially back 

pain. This isn’t the 1950’s, and 

we are well aware of how 

dangerous opioid prescription 

is. We cannot claim ignorance 

for opioid utilization, but 

instead have to accept 

negligence and/or financial 

gain as a major driver of this 

crisis. In any given doctorpatient 

interaction, what is best 

for the patient should be the 

primary driver of the 

recommended intervention. 

Unfortunately, it has become 

apparent that most opioid 

prescriptions were given for 

financial gain of the members 

of the medical system. This 

became obvious when federal 

crackdowns on opioid 

prescription resulted in federal 

charges, fines, and even 

incarceration of medical 

doctors, pharmacists, and even 

pharmaceutical company 

CEOs. 

Over the past couple years, a 

great deal of reformation has 

occurred within the medical 

system in an attempt to 

address the raging fire that is 

the opioid crisis. The fight 

against opioid deaths is being 

fought on multiple levels. On 

the ground, first responders 

now carry a drug, Naloxone/ 

Narcan, that can save a life 

from an overdoes by reversing 

the toxic effect of opioids. As a 

mid-level intervention, many 

different specialties of medical 

doctors will no longer 

prescribe prescription opioids. 

Lastly, on the highest level, 

guidelines are being passed 

down from the federal 

government, medicalgoverning 

bodies, and health 

insurance companies regarding 

the management of patients/ 

conditions that previously 

would have been prescribed an 

opioid. After spending billions 

of dollars on research, 

government and private 

authorities agree, there needs 

to be a shift in how the 

American medical system 

manages musculoskeletal 

conditions. There must be a 

shift in the medical 

management of back/neck 

pain, headaches, sciatica, 

arthritis, and other muscle/joint 

related painful conditions. 

Medicare, the American 

Medical Association, and many 

other governing bodies all 

agree, we must move away 

from pharmacologic 

management (prescribing 

drugs) for painful conditions. 

But where are we supposed to 

move to? The beautiful part 

about all of this is that the 

answer has been right under 

our nose for the past 125+ 

years; Chiropractic. 

Chiropractic care has 

repeatedly shown to be the 

most effective and safest form 

of treatment for musculo- 

skeletal issues, hands down. It 

is time for the old school belief 

that chiropractic isn’t a valid 

form of health care to be 

obliterated. The depth and 

extent of the research that 

proves how safe and effective 

chiropractic care is beyond the 

scope of this article. However, 

maybe one of the most 

impactful studies shows a 50% 

reduction in opioid use among 

patients getting chiropractic 

care and patients who see a 

chiropractor are 30 times less 

likely to end up having back or 

neck surgery than if they don’t 

receive chiropractic care. 

Our country desperately 

needs a shift in how we 

manage our health and 

function. Drugs and surgery 

are not the answer for this, we 

have relied on that the past 

several decades and it has 

spawned the worst health care 

crisis this country has ever 

seen. The evidence for the cost 

effectiveness, safety, and 

efficacy (how well it works) for 

chiropractic is so strong that it 

can not be disputed by any 

intelligent, knowledgeable 

health care provider. Save your 

life and save the lives of your 

family, naturally, with 

chiropractic care. 


GET SERIOUS 

ABOUT SELF-CARE. 

Take care of yourself and each other. 

Talk about safer sex and HIV prevention— 

like using condoms. 

WATCH 

MEMPHIS 901 FC 

ON 

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k MIDTOWN 

Photo: ©iStock/PIKSEL. Model not real Planned Parenthood patient. 

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NEW LOCATION DOWNTOWN COMING 2021!

SNEAK PEAK 

Curated by Chellie Bowman (she/her) 

TO READ 

STREAMING 

Milkfed by Melissa Broder 

Next on my reading list, this new daring 

novel by Melissa Broder explores a young 

woman’s fantasy-laden journey with, 

and hunger for, sex, food, 

and a woman named Miriam. 

Master of None Presents 

Moments in Love 

The latest season of Master of None 

departs from the first two and is centered 

around the relationship between Denise 

(Lena Waithe) and her wife Alicia (Naomi 

Ackie) as they navigate difficulties 

in married life and pursuing fertility 

treatments as a lesbian couple. Available 

on Netflix. 


life 

Dealing with 

COVID GRIEF AND ANGER 

by Sheena Barnett 

It’s been a year since he passed from COVID-19. 

I always knew that grieving my dad would 

be complicated, due to our close-but-not-close 

relationship, but COVID complicated things 

further. It has complicated everything for everyone, 

of course. But if you’ve lost someone to COVID, 

you know that COVID grief is different from other 

grief. I am not saying it’s worse; this isn’t the 

Grief Olympics, and none of us want a 

Gold Medal in Who’s Hurting the Most. 

It’s just weird and different. 

My dad and I had a 

relationship that no one 

understood but us, and even 

then, I don’t think I understood 

it that well. 

We weren’t especially 

close, like in the way that I’m 

close with my mom. We had 

almost nothing in common 

at all. He would rather spend 

his weekends at a football 

game, while I’d rather be at 

a concert or reading. He was 

conservative; I’m liberal. I can’t 

tell you the number of times 

he walked away from me, 

shaking his head, because he 

didn’t “get” me and whatever 

I was into at the moment. 

We bonded over food and 

travel, but that was about it. 

We knew what topics were 

open for discussion and what 

wasn’t, and we stuck to that. 

I regret now that we never 

dug any deeper than shallow 

conversations about baseball 

or my cat. 

It’s been a year since he 

passed from COVID-19. I 

always knew that grieving my 

dad would be complicated, 

due to our close-but-notclose 

relationship, but COVID 

complicated things further. It 

has complicated everything 

for everyone, of course. 

But if you’ve lost someone 

to COVID, you know that 

COVID grief is different from 

other grief. I am not saying 

it’s worse; this isn’t the Grief 

Olympics, and none of us 

want a Gold Medal in Who’s 

Hurting the Most. It’s just 

weird and different. 

I am fascinated by death 

and the sociology of death 

and dying. I love to study how 

dying and funeral practices 

have changed over the years. 

I think a lot of us expect - 

or even hope - for a calm, 

quiet death, surrounded by 

our family or friends as we 

transition into the next life. 

But my dad didn’t get 

that - not quite. My family 

and I FaceTimed him - he, in 

his hospital room, and we, 

standing outside the hospital 

- a few days before he passed. 

The last day he was conscious. 

We knew he wouldn’t make 

it - and I think he knew it, too 

- but I couldn’t bring myself 

to say, “Goodbye.” I couldn’t 

bring myself to say, “Thank 

you for being my father.” I was 

paralyzed in denial, sadness 

and fear, and I couldn’t 

express my many emotions. I 

just waved at him, gave him a 

thumbs up (he loved to give 

thumbs up), and told him I 

loved him. I felt ridiculous 

for only managing those 

little actions when I felt so 

emotionally overwhelmed. 

I am appreciative that the 

hospital let us FaceTime him, 

but that just isn’t the same 

as being there with him. All I 

have wanted to do since his 

passing is to give him a high 

five, then hold his hand - like 

we always did when we parted 

ways. I feel robbed of that 


opportunity - and COVID is the 

thief. I can’t help but wonder if 

my father felt robbed of final 

connection, too. 

COVID made his funeral 

difficult. The funeral home 

suggested we stay away from 

his body, just to be safe. I am 

not typically someone who 

enjoys looking at my loved 

one’s dead body, so I was OK 

with this - but it felt strange to 

see him and think to myself, I 

can’t be near him. 

Only a handful of people 

were allowed to be in the 

funeral home at any given 

time, so his funeral was small 

and not as well attended as it 

would’ve been. My boyfriend 

couldn’t be there to comfort 

me. None of my friends could 

attend. While my family 

members comforted me, I felt 

so alone. My daddy was gone, 

and I was by myself. I think I 

would have felt that way had 

he died of anything else, but, 

again - COVID is the thief. 

In the weeks and months 

following his passing, I thought 

about him constantly. I missed 

the daily phone calls and 

weekend visits. But reminders 

of his death were literally 

everywhere - COVID was all 

over the news, everyone wore 

a mask, social distancing 

reminders were posted 

everywhere or pumped in 

through the grocery store’s 

speakers. No matter what 

you did, COVID was there to 

complicate it. Should I wear 

a mask when I walk to the 

mailbox? Is it safe to meet 

with a friend outdoors? I took 

every precaution and then 

some. I didn’t want to be the 

reason that some other family 

grieved. 

My sadness quickly turned 

to anger. As COVID deniers 

got louder, I got angrier. I felt 

constantly full of rage as I 

saw people refuse to wear a 

mask, traveled, and ate out in 

restaurants. I’ve never been an 

angry person, but I was livid. 

Constantly. Did these people 

really want to put others’ lives 

in danger, all for the sake of 

a burger, a manicure, or a 

trip to the beach? I was never 

someone to post rants on 

social media, but I became 

that person overnight. It 

did little good, but at least I 

released some pent-up anger. 

I joined a Facebook group for 

people who lost someone to 

COVID, and I learned that all of 

us in that group are intensely 

angry. We’re angry that 

COVID happened, and we’re 

especially angry that we, as a 

society, let it get as bad as it 

was. It was all so preventable. 

All of these deaths could’ve 

been prevented. 

Those same feelings I felt 

when my dad was sick with 

COVID came back several 

more times to haunt me, 

as I watched other friends 

and family members battle 

the virus. It was absolutely 

terrifying to hear them 

struggle to breathe. Some of 

them are long-haulers with 

serious complications. They’re 

angry at the virus - and I’m 

angry on their behalf. 

I’m going to be angry for 

as long as this virus is around, 

and beyond that. I will always 

be angry that this virus took 

away my father, and that it 

has robbed my friends of their 

quality of life. I will always 

be angry that some people 

would rather live their lives 

“like normal,” at the risk of 

everyone else’s well-being. 

It feels like a slap in the face 

to me, as someone who lost 

someone to COVID, when I 

see people disregarding mask 

mandates, social distancing 

or even the most basic 

safety protocols. It feels like 

a personal attack, and it is 

personal. Someone else’s 

negligence led to my dad’s 

death. 

I expected to feel relief 

after getting the vaccine, but 

I kept forgetting I was even 

vaccinated. I guess all of the 

trauma from the past year 

overrode that feeling entirely. 

I am relieved that my mom 

is vaccinated, but it barely 

registers with me that I am 

vaccinated, too. I still live as 

carefully as I did when the 

pandemic began. I am still 

terrified of this virus. I’ve seen 

what it can do and I don’t want 

it - even a mild case can leave 

you with permanent effects. 

No, thanks. 

And no, CDC, I’m not going 

to stop wearing my mask just 

because I am vaccinated. 

Maybe it’s a trauma thing, 

maybe I’m just used to them 

by now, but I think I’ll want to 

wear masks in public for a long 

time to come. 

I’m also anxious that an 

anti-masker will confront me 

about my mask. In my anger, 

I’ve come to see the COVID 

deniers and anti-maskers as 

monsters. They frighten me 

with their willful ignorance and 

complete disregard for others. 

I try my best to balance 

out the anger and fear with 

gratitude. I am thankful for 

the vaccines, which arrived so 

quickly and are so efficient. I 

am thankful, each and every 

day, for my health, for my 

family and friends, and for 

their health. I am thankful 

that I had 38 years with my 

dad, and I’m thankful for 

the memories we made. I’m 

thankful for the people who 

are still being careful. 

I don’t think I’ll ever fully 

comprehend my dad’s death 

and the COVID complications 

that surrounded it. It’s just 

one more thing that makes my 

relationship with my dad a bit 

more complicated. 

But one thing that 

feels crystal clear and 

uncomplicated: I want 

my dad’s memory to be 

recognized and honored. 

I want that for all of the 

600,000 people who have 

died due to the virus. It feels 

like society is trying so hard 

to ignore the fact that we’ve 

lost 600,000 of our family, 

friends and neighbors - but it 

is deeply disrespectful to do 

that. Each of those numbers is 

a person, a human being. Each 

of them left behind grieving 

family and friends. 

If you have lost someone 

due to COVID, please know 

that I see you, and I see and 

understand your grief. 

You matter. 

Your loved one matters. 

And your grief - and all the 

complicated feelings that go 

with it - matters. 

Take care. 



THE IMPORTANCE OF 

BODY CONFIDENCE 

by Jennifer Ferren, LPC-MHSP, ACS | Ferren Family Counseling 

There is a quote shared by Gabourey Sidibe: “One day I decided that I was beautiful 

and so I carried out my life as if I was a beautiful girl. It doesn’t have anything to do 

with how the world perceives you. What matters is what you see. ”It’s a difficult 

message to hold on to. Especially with different messages coming through to us 

through TV, movies, social media, and our own friends, family, and others around us. 

She looks so great in that dress, why can’t I look that good? 

Looks like you gained some COVID pounds, didn’t you? 

Are the bags under my eyes too noticeable? 

With these messages being sent to us from within and out, 

accepting one’s own body can be challenging. 


There has been a lot of 

debate on accepting your body, 

and showing positivity towards 

different body types. The terms 

body confidence and body 

positivity are widely used, and 

can sometimes be confused as 

the same thing. A person’s 

confidence in how they look is 

often varied. When one has 

body confidence, they are 

content with how they look and 

how their bodies can perform. 

Whereas, body positivity is a 

social movement aimed at 

empowering people, as well as 

challenging how society 

portrays and interprets the 

physical body. The movement 

promotes acceptance of all 

bodies, regardless of size, 

gender expression, color, or 

appearance. 

Importance Of Body 

Confidence 

Body confidence is crucial to 

work on for a variety of 

reasons. It can not only bring 

change in the way you look at 

your appearance but also 

highlight your capabilities. 

Having more confidence in your 

body can assist you in pushing 

outside of your comfort zone. 

And getting out of your 

comfort zone helps you grow 

by allowing you to take chances 

that promote progress. 

Or you can say that the more 

you improve your body 

confidence, the more you love 

yourself and are able to focus 

on the many positive aspects of 

yourself. And when you 

concentrate on the positive 

aspects of life, you are more 

likely to reach your goals. 

Hence, body confidence can 

really help to enhance your 

well-being. 

TIPS TO BOOST BODY 

CONFIDENCE 

There are many ways to 

improve body confidence: 

Say kind words to yourself 

Begin praising yourself to 

boost yourself; your mind 

believes what you say, whether 

it is fact or imagined, and our 

brains can be jerks. Tell yourself 

that you are worthwhile, 

intelligent, and deserving. Be as 

compassionate to yourself as 

you are to your best friend. 

Express some gratitude to 

yourself 

Body confidence is not all 

about appreciating how you 

appear; it’s also about being 

appreciative of what you have. 

We might spend so much time 

nitpicking and criticizing our 

bodies that we lose sight of the 

fact that they are the thing that 

keeps us alive. Take a moment 

to reflect on all the wonderful 

things your body accomplishes 

for you. This encompasses your 

breathing, your senses, your 

movement, your emotions, and 

your humor. IT ALSO 

INVOLVES KEEPING YOU 

ALIVE. 

Make friends with your 

reflection 

You must become intimate 

with yourself to enhance your 

body confidence. This requires 

spending some time 

in front of the mirror. 

One of the effective 

ways is to note what 

you admire about 

yourself when you 

gaze in the mirror. 

Maybe your eyes, 

elbows, and feet are 

your favorite parts of 

your body. It doesn’t 

matter what it is; find 

at least one quality 

about yourself that 

you enjoy. 

Even if you don’t 

like the way you look, 

start saying positive 

statements to 

yourself in the mirror. 

For instance, “I’m 

beautiful,” “I’m 

healthy,” “My eyes are 

pretty; ”you may not 

believe these 

statements at first, 

especially if you are 

prone to self-hate, 

but with time, you will 

start believing what 

you say. That is how 

your mind works. 

Don’t look at the number 

It’s good to be physically fit, 

but your mental health is so 

very vital. Stop staring at the 

numbers on the scales if they 

make you feel bad about 

yourself. You are so much more 

than those figures. If you want 

to enhance your health, you 

don’t need those scales to 

accomplish so. Without even 

glancing at the number, you 

can move in ways that feel 

wonderful. 

Talk to a professional 

Building one’s body 

confidence does not have to be 

done alone. Please know there 

are many wonderful, qualified 

medical and mental health 

professionals who can help you 

on your journey. If you are 

struggling with your body 

image or self-esteem, please, 

reach out. Resources for help 

can be made through your 

insurance provider, 

recommendations from 

families/ friends, or check out a 

Google search for help in your 

area. 

In short, body image is not 

about having a thin waist, 

having a certain skin tone, 

having smooth hair, or anything 

else; it’s about being content in 

our own bodies. As a society, 

we have a long journey ahead 

- as a community, as a culture 

- to accept and celebrate all 

bodies, regardless of gender 

expression, size, color, or 

ability. Above all, we need to 

recognize our own worth. We 

are more than what we look 

like. 

Ferren Family Counseling 

895 Cooper Street 


ferrenfamilycounseling.com 

(901) 498-9126 


music 

LGBTQ Musician 

Lana Blue Releases 

I Was Never Yours 

by Joey Amato | photo by Lana Blue 

Allana Rachel Zerrudo aka 

“Lana Blue” is a 22-year-old 

independent queer musician 

living New York City. She writes 

songs to make sense of life and 

sings them from the heart 

hoping her art resonates with 

people of all kinds. The multitalented 

songwriter just 

released her debut single “I Was 

Never Yours,” which Lana wrote 

after her first queer romantic 

experience, one that ended 

abruptly. “It’s kind of like my 

version of ‘The One That Got 

Away’,” mentions Lana. “I chose 

it to be my first single because it 

was the moment that I realized I 

wanted to be a queer artist.” 

The Filipina-American artist 

enlisted the talented Derek 

Dunivan to produce the track, 

which is now available on all 

streaming platforms. “I work 

really hard to represent, uplift, 

and support the Asian American 

and Pacific Islander 

communities as well as the 

LGBTQ community and all other 

BIPOC communities in every 

way I can.” A music video to 

accompany the song will be 

released in the upcoming weeks 

and was directed by 

transgender director Maya 

Dispenza. 

When did you realize you 

wanted to be a musician? 

Born and raised in New Jersey 

by a family of medical workers, I 

was always the black sheep of 

the family. No one in the family 

had a musical background. My 

mom always made jokes like 

“where did that come from?” I 

think it all started when Taylor 

Swift debuted in 2006 when I 

was 8 years old. I saw her video 

for “Teardrops on My Guitar” 

and instantly knew that was 

what I wanted to do. I asked my 

parents for a guitar, and I’ve 

been playing and writing music 

ever since! 

Has Performing Been Difficult 

During COVID? 

The past year has been 

challenging. I consider myself a 

bedroom pop artist who played 

school talent shows as a kid. As 

a young adult did a bunch of 

open mics down the Jersey 

shore and in NYC. Instead of 

college, I spent my last 4 years 

in NYC modeling and acting to 

gain confidence and build 

connections. Music was always 

the goal though. Running a 

career as an independent artist 

is a lot more than having talent, 

especially if you’re not born with 

connections. It’s being smart 

with finances, building a team, a 

brand, a social media following, 

attending workshops and 

networking on top of honing 

your craft. At the present age of 

22, with my support system and 

the mental growth I’ve had after 

quarantine self-reflection, I 

finally feel ready to debut as an 

artist. 

What is your favorite song/ 

artist to cover live? 

My favorite song to cover live 

is probably “Somebody Else” by 

The 1975. I remember being so 

in awe when I saw them live at 

Madison Square Garden. I came 

out of the closet literally that 

month, so their rainbow lights 

and aesthetically pleasing stage 

really stuck in my mind. 

Whenever I cover that song, I’m 

right back to that night. I love 

front man Matty Healy’s rocker 

stage presence with the band, 

but also how he can encapsulate 

a whole different energy solo 

with an acoustic guitar. It blows 

my mind how he can strip the 

same songs down to something 

so raw and heartbreaking. 

Talk about the process of 

writing and recording “I Was 

Never Yours” 

“I Was Never Yours” is a 

nostalgic lo-fi alternative-pop 

song relatable to anyone who 

lost an almost-lover. We all have 

that “one that got away” when 

we were younger. I wrote it 

about my first romantic 

experience with a girl ending 

abruptly. At the time I was a 

closeted cheerleader in high 

school. So, the girl and I had a 

“more than friends…but not 

together” kind of situation going 

on. She showed me a lot of the 

music that inspired my sound 

today. She was the first girl I 

ever loved, after hiding that part 

of myself for so long. It hit me 

hard when it ended before it 

officially started. Moping about 

her late one night, I wrote the 

lyrics to a lo-fi track on 

Soundcloud by Magnus 

Thompson “I’m Not Sad. I Just 

Made This for The People Who 

Are.” 

Not long after I went to a Jon 

Bellion concert where I first saw 

my producer Derek Dunivan. 

(He was Jon’s guitarist that 

night.) Years later whilst in 

lockdown, I reached out to him 

and he agreed to produce for 

me. I thought long and hard 

about what I wanted to release 

as my first song… and realized 

everything I am today all comes 

back to that first girl. Because of 

her, today I am out and proud as 

a queer pop artist. So naturally, I 

chose to debut the song I wrote 

for her and hired a famous 

lesbian artist Jenifer Prince to 

create the cover art. I swear I’m 

over her though (maybe it still 

stings just a little). 

When do you expect the album 

to be completed? 

Summer 2022. It’s looking like 

it will be 13 tracks right now. 

Until then I’ll be pushing singles, 

music videos and maybe a 

surprise EP. 

If there is one artist you would 

like to duet with, who would it 

be? 

Definitely King Princess. I 

think our east coast indie 

alternative vibes would mesh 

well together. 

What is your vision for your 

career? Who would you like to 

emulate? 

My vision for my career is to 

be both a successful 

businesswoman, and artist like 

Rihanna. I want to be a power 

woman in the entertainment 

industry, but also start my own 

businesses. Right now, I am 

collaborating with several queer 

and BIPOC - run businesses 

regularly on Instagram. Two 

businesses you should check 

out which I plan to work with 

long-term are Outplay - which is 

a Miami gender neutral 

swimwear company, and 

Brooklyn-based Hustle + Flo 

which is a Latinx female run 

CBD product company. I am a 

proud pansexual Filipina- 

American and I want to 

represent and make my 

community proud. It’s important 

to me that my audience knows I 

am an advocate for equality, the 

planet, feminism, the LGBTQ 

rights and all other communities 

that need their voice amplified. 

For more information, visit: 

https://lanabluemusic.wixsite. 

com/website 


Every season has challenges and 

every new year has opportunities. 

If you’re seeking a career with a company 

that will offer you both – come join us! 

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2021 Issue 4 Jul/Aug - Focus Mid-South magazine

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