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Glamping: An Extraordinary Escape AT FORTY FIVE Magazine Issue 2021 04

A magazine for women 45+ who want to own aging with spirit and joy. For those of us rediscovering who we are & exploring what we want next. We want more; health, wealth, happiness, & fulfillment. Join women around the world navigating the best years yet.

A magazine for women 45+ who want to own aging with spirit and joy. For those of us rediscovering who we are & exploring what we want next. We want more; health, wealth, happiness, & fulfillment. Join women around the world navigating the best years yet.

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J U L Y | I S S U E N O . 2 1 0 1 0 4<br />

<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong><br />

The <strong>Magazine</strong> For Women 45+<br />

G L A M P I N G : A N E X T R A O R D I N A R Y E S C A P E<br />

Your Neckline<br />

Needs Jewlery<br />

Everything You Need<br />

To Know About <strong>Glamping</strong><br />

Top Tips On How To<br />

Manage Stress


E D I T O R ' S N O T E S<br />

I remember when I was about ten, my dad brought home a<br />

huge army surplus tent. It was the only affordable option<br />

that fit our family of nine +. That was the beginning of many<br />

wonderful summers spent parked beside wild Rocky<br />

Mountain rivers and pristine ice cold lakes.<br />

There are many more places to explore in this world, but the<br />

luxury of glamping when I need a nature fix, means making<br />

new memories is much more manageable.<br />

This issue, Kirsten shares some tips for managing stress if<br />

you can't get glamping. You can cross things off your to-do<br />

list for five bucks, bake am easy yummy campfire cake. Ariel<br />

dishes advice on the four pillars of health and April Rose<br />

More shares her Aura of Woman Series.<br />

Wishing you a week of peace,<br />

SHERRY KALLERGIS<br />

“ I G O T O N A T U R E T O B E S O O T H E D A N D H E A L E D , A N D T O H A V E M Y<br />

S E N S E S P U T I N O R D E R . — J O H N B U R R O U G H S


C O N T E N T S<br />

03<br />

editor's note<br />

07<br />

YOUR NECKLINE<br />

NEEDS JEWELERY<br />

10<br />

everything you need<br />

to know about<br />

glamping<br />

16<br />

campfire orange<br />

cake, yummy any<br />

time anywhere<br />

17<br />

You want to feel;<br />

better? four<br />

pillars of health<br />

19<br />

Fiverr® A<br />

Plethora Of<br />

Services For $5<br />

22<br />

Top Tips on How To<br />

Manage Feeling<br />

Overwhelmed<br />

24<br />

Aura of woman


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /05


C O N T R I B U T O R S<br />

03<br />

Sherry Kallergis<br />

Editor<br />

<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong><br />

17<br />

ariel Jarvis, rhn<br />

vitality wellness<br />

world<br />

07<br />

RONIT ZISWILER<br />

RZ jEWELRY dESIGN<br />

16<br />

howard's facet<br />

22<br />

kirsten<br />

kulukundis<br />

The Next Half<br />

24<br />

APRIL ROSE MORE<br />

APRIL ROSE MORE<br />

PHOTOGRAPHY


YOUR<br />

NECKLINE<br />

Needs<br />

Jewelry<br />

/ BY RONIT ZISWILER<br />

Choosing the perfect necklace is such a personal experience and also something<br />

that can feel pleasurable and wonderfully self-indulgent.<br />

Our necks are a very sensitive and sensual area and are considered an erogenous<br />

zone. I’ve often wondered if that’s why, through the centuries, we’ve had a<br />

tradition of decorating ourselves in this area to draw attention to it.<br />

Necklaces can be surprisingly difficult to get just right. So, taking time to appreciate and<br />

adorn this area of your body in a way that accentuates your femininity and elegance is really<br />

important.<br />

/ BY K<strong>AT</strong>HY P<strong>AT</strong>ELLIS SCHMIDT


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE<br />

LOOK BEAUTIFUL<br />

CI’m a firm believer that accessories are the<br />

key to fashion success. They add spice and<br />

individuality to an outfit, which can elevate<br />

a look to a whole new level.<br />

If you enjoy big, bold costume jewelry there<br />

are lots of statement necklaces around that<br />

will add colour and drama to the simplest<br />

of outfits. But if your taste is more classic,<br />

then you may prefer pieces that are neat<br />

and elegant and will remain timeless.<br />

Classic jewelry really doesn’t have to be<br />

boring!<br />

When you’re choosing your perfect<br />

necklace there are a few things to<br />

consider…<br />

Pearl & Tassel<br />

Traditional or modern?<br />

Classic jewelry really doesn’t have to be<br />

boring!<br />

Traditionally diamonds are the first choice for<br />

engagement and wedding rings because they<br />

symbolize eternity and love. <strong>An</strong>d pearls are<br />

the epitome of lady-like elegance when<br />

paired with an understated outfit.<br />

But gone are the days of only wearing<br />

diamonds and pearls for traditional and<br />

formal occasions. They’ve had a fashion<br />

revival and you’ll find them being used in<br />

cutting-edge modern designs. Because of<br />

this, more and more women are mixing them<br />

in with their individual everyday style, which<br />

gives these gems a fresh and edgy twist.<br />

Mother of Pearl


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /09<br />

LOOK BEAUTIFUL<br />

Make It Personal<br />

The main benefit of wearing an accessory is<br />

that it’s a great way to inject a bit of your<br />

own personality and creativity into an<br />

outfit. You can have two people wearing<br />

exactly the same outfit, but as soon as<br />

accessories are added – hey presto, they<br />

couldn’t look more different!<br />

Horn Beads<br />

This personality element can sometimes<br />

make choosing a necklace for someone<br />

else feels a little tricky. But don’t let that<br />

put you off, because it really is a special<br />

gesture and that shows how much you<br />

care. The thing to remember is that not<br />

every metal suit every person, so if you’re<br />

unsure your best option is to go for rose<br />

gold because it looks great with any skin<br />

tone.<br />

Formal Or Casual?<br />

The choice of material for necklaces usually<br />

comes down to whether you’re going for a<br />

formal or a casual look.<br />

As a general rule, a more ornate necklace<br />

with a lot of stones looks best with a formal<br />

outfit, while casual outfits will benefit from<br />

a simpler design.<br />

Rose Quartz<br />

There’s no right or wrong, of course, always<br />

go with what feels right for you and have<br />

fun experimenting. Just keep in mind that<br />

loads of diamonds might look a bit out of<br />

place with a casual t-shirt and jeans<br />

combo!


EVERYTHING YOU NEED<br />

TO KNOW ABOUT<br />

/BY SHERRY KALLERGIS<br />

<strong>Glamping</strong> literally redefines the conventional concept of camping. After spending half of<br />

glamping!<br />

your life handling household and career responsibilities, don’t you deserve a special retreat?


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /11<br />

Does the passion for traveling keep haunting<br />

you in your dreams? No matter how many<br />

attractive destinations you have traveled to so<br />

far, there’s a lot more to explore in the world.<br />

Though many travel enthusiasts aren’t familiar<br />

with glamping, you should experience an<br />

exotic glamping trip once in your lifetime.<br />

What Exactly Is <strong>Glamping</strong>?<br />

The concept of glamping is easy to understand.<br />

You probably have a retro camping experience<br />

in your past. It might not have been a totally<br />

positive experience. Recalling your sore back<br />

after a night on the hard ground or the fall as<br />

you stumbled to the bathroom in the pitchblack<br />

night might mean you are content to<br />

leave camping in the past. After all, many of us<br />

are now spoiled by our “dream beds” and<br />

creature comforts. Our creaky knees and bad<br />

backs may get in the way of embracing the<br />

concept of camping.<br />

In simple words, glamping means enjoying<br />

nature with all the luxurious amenities at hand.<br />

When you arrange a typical camping session,<br />

you don’t get the comfort of a five-star resort in<br />

your tent. You are at the mercy of mother<br />

nature. Instead, glamping offers you luxurious<br />

and relaxing amenities while enjoying nature.<br />

As well, if you travel to offbeat destinations,<br />

glamping can be an ideal choice when the<br />

hotel experience is not an option.<br />

Why glamping is a<br />

preferable option?<br />

Perhaps, you are just coming up short with<br />

enough energy to go camping. Why make<br />

things difficult? You can enjoy an authentic yet<br />

convenient “resort” during your glamping trip<br />

There is no point in suffering, right? So, what’s<br />

holding you back? Get planning your glamping<br />

trip!<br />

<strong>Glamping</strong> Is Good For Your<br />

Mental and Physical Wellbeing<br />

If you still have doubts, glamping can enhance<br />

your physical and mental wellbeing. For<br />

example:<br />

You can boost your energy levels just by<br />

getting in tune with nature. A glamping trip<br />

helps you take your mind away from your<br />

hectic life and gives your mind and soul a<br />

refresh.<br />

A customized glamping trip comes with<br />

loads of new experiences and stunning<br />

destinations to explore.<br />

<strong>Glamping</strong> can help decrease your stress<br />

levels significantly by providing some worryfree,<br />

time.<br />

A temporary change in your lifestyle will<br />

renew your focus and give you have a sense<br />

of freedom from your humdrum routine.<br />

What are the best platforms for<br />

booking <strong>Glamping</strong> sessions?<br />

There are multiple platforms that are extremely<br />

helpful for booking <strong>Glamping</strong> trips. How do you<br />

determine the best platforms among all the<br />

available options? Well, <strong>Glamping</strong> Hub<br />

(headquartered in Denver, Colorado, USA, and<br />

Seville, Spain) and Airbnb are two<br />

internationally recognized and exceptional<br />

names when it comes to booking a glamping<br />

experience.<br />

Both of the platforms offer all types of<br />

glamping sessions with different budget plans,<br />

desired levels of convenience, and unique<br />

activities. The customer support teams of these<br />

platforms are highly reliable in terms of<br />

resolving client queries and obligations. So,<br />

where are you going?


Explore <strong>Glamping</strong><br />

In Turkey<br />

Image Credit Airbnb<br />

In Greece Image Credit<br />

<strong>Glamping</strong> Hub<br />

In Spain<br />

Image Credit <strong>Glamping</strong> Hub<br />

In France<br />

Image Credit Airbnb


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /11<br />

Hover or click on image or credits to go directly to the glamping offer<br />

Glamp The World<br />

In UK<br />

Image Credit<br />

Airbnb<br />

In Phillipines<br />

Image Credit Airbnb<br />

In Croatia<br />

Image Credit <strong>Glamping</strong> Hub<br />

In UK<br />

Image Credit <strong>Glamping</strong> Hub


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /11<br />

Back To Nature <strong>Glamping</strong><br />

In Canada<br />

Image Credit Airbnb<br />

In USA Image Credit Airbnb<br />

In USA Image Credit <strong>Glamping</strong> Hub<br />

In USA Image Credit Airbnb


Glamp In Nature<br />

Hover or click on image or credits to go directly<br />

to the glamping offer<br />

<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /11<br />

In Canada<br />

Image Credit <strong>Glamping</strong> Hub<br />

In USA Image Credit Airbnb<br />

In Canada Image Credit <strong>Glamping</strong> Hub


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE<br />

/17<br />

YOU WANT<br />

TO<br />

FEEL<br />

BETTER?<br />

Four Pillars Of<br />

Health<br />

/ B Y V I D E O E X C E R P T W I T H A R I A L J A R V I S , V I T A L I T Y W E L L N E S S W O R L D<br />

P A R T 2 O F 2<br />

Pillar Of Health Two: Sleep<br />

Repairs Your Body<br />

The second pillar is sleep. How many people<br />

give up their good quality sleep to be able to<br />

get up early to go to the gym. Or chase their<br />

kids around instead of going for a nap.<br />

It's so important. You need seven to nine<br />

hours of good quality sleep. If you wake up for<br />

more than 20 minutes, you're basically<br />

starting that system all over again. So, it's very<br />

important if you do wake up to use the<br />

washroom, or go check on a noise, try to go<br />

back to sleep within 15 minutes because once<br />

you're at 20 minutes, your clocks start all over<br />

again. <strong>An</strong>d with arithmetic medicine, every<br />

single organ system detoxifies and cleans<br />

itself at a certain hour in the night.<br />

If you are working the grave shift, or your<br />

hours are all over the place and you don't<br />

have a system you're not going to regulate<br />

your circadian rhythm. Your body's not<br />

going to be able to get into a pattern of<br />

detoxifying itself properly. This can wreak<br />

havoc on your mental health<br />

What happens is that in the seventh hour<br />

the brain detoxifies all the neural toxins<br />

that you've been breathing in the last 24<br />

hours. I encourage you and I challenge you<br />

to get at least 7 hours of sleep every single<br />

night. <strong>An</strong>d if you're not sleeping properly<br />

get help.<br />

Pillar Of Health Three:<br />

Proper Nutrients Are Key<br />

The third pillar is nutrition. We don't need<br />

to be eating an abundance of food, eating<br />

less is better, and eating right for our cells.<br />

You want to make sure that you are getting<br />

the proper nutrients in the body and you're<br />

not overeating or undereating. Try not to


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE<br />

eat when you're stressed because as we<br />

know, we have something called a central<br />

nervous system and that will interact with<br />

your gut health.<br />

If you eat when you're stressed, the body<br />

goes into something called “Fight or Flight”<br />

which is the sympathetic nervous system.<br />

The stomach shuts off and you will not be<br />

able to secrete the proper enzymes, the<br />

hydrochloric acid, and the pepsin to break<br />

down and absorb all those wonderful<br />

nutrients. Your bioavailability of those<br />

nutrients decreases. That's bad because it<br />

puts you into fat storage mode and your<br />

cortisol goes up.<br />

I encourage and challenge you if you're<br />

feeling stressed, drink a glass of water and<br />

go for a walk or go do something that's<br />

going to relax you. Get your feet massaged,<br />

put on your favorite song, pet your cat, or<br />

have a cup of tea. Do those things just for<br />

about 15 minutes to regulate your stress.<br />

After a long day, or on the road stuck in<br />

traffic, don't go through a drive-through.<br />

Don't eat when you're stressed. Wait, till you<br />

get into the parasympathetic system, which<br />

is the rest, digest, repair system.<br />

Pillar of Health Four:<br />

Exercise Daily<br />

Exercise every single day, any form of<br />

movement is important. Clean your house,<br />

walk your dog, do a little bit of stretching.<br />

Just a little every day can prevent you from<br />

getting 13 different types of cancer.<br />

It cleans the lymphatic system, which is<br />

going to help you with your skin, just like,<br />

Helen earlier explained beautifully.<br />

When you start focusing on these four<br />

pillars, you're going to start to notice that<br />

your body is no longer going to be a<br />

survival mode. It is going to thrive.<br />

Watch The Show<br />

Ariel Jarvis is a registered Iridologist,<br />

Sclerologist, Holistic Nutritionist, Certified<br />

Microscopist, and Acutherapist<br />

Visit Vitality Wellness World


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE<br />

What Exactly is Fiverr®?<br />

It is a platform for buyers and sellers. In this age<br />

of freelancing, this is the ultimate marketplace<br />

where you can offer a service or buy one. There<br />

are over 500 service categories and in 2020 their<br />

revenue was 189.51 million (source: Fiverr®)<br />

Originally, when it started in 2010 the opening<br />

level of pricing was $5.00 US, hence the name.<br />

The base price has increased slightly over time,<br />

and some services are more. Many services have<br />

add-ons (stock images, copyrights, delivery date<br />

options) that increase the price but once you<br />

make a choice, the price is fixed. Many of the<br />

sellers are from around the globe so don't expect<br />

perfect grammar but the service is outstanding.<br />

I have used it countless times for posters, logo<br />

designs, business advice, tag lines, invitations,<br />

business card designs, videos, editing, and even<br />

a lifestyle coach. I have been satisfied with all of<br />

them, although some more than others.<br />

What Kind of Quality Do You Get?<br />

Each time the quality was worth more than I<br />

paid, and the result met my needs.<br />

Is It Trustworthy?<br />

I am comfortable using this service because:<br />

My son first recommended it.<br />

My privacy is protected. Both parties use<br />

usernames and the platform is the<br />

middleman.<br />

You can look at samples of their work,<br />

review all seller’s services by ratings, and<br />

see how much work they have in the<br />

queue before yours.<br />

It is easy to create an account and use it.<br />

Most sellers allow one revision request to<br />

their first version.<br />

If there is any type of problem with the<br />

product there is a recourse action<br />

process that works well. A few times<br />

what I needed was not delivered to my<br />

satisfaction and there was no charge.<br />

Am I Taking Advantage of<br />

People at this Rate?<br />

Many people use Fiverr® to supplement<br />

their income as well as practice their<br />

English and their trade. You are supporting<br />

the gig economy and connecting with those<br />

who want to work.


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /21<br />

How Does Fiverr® Work?<br />

There are 8 easy steps!<br />

You create an account, set up your username<br />

and password, add your payment<br />

information.<br />

Find the service you are looking for by<br />

entering a search term or looking at the<br />

applicable tab.<br />

Browse the offerings and choose the vendor<br />

whose style is most like your wants or needs.<br />

Place the order on your card and complete<br />

the purchase.<br />

Add specifications such as details about your<br />

concept, ideas, color swatches, font, etc. This<br />

information is used to produce the final<br />

product.<br />

Wait for the product to be delivered.<br />

Review the product and request a revision or<br />

accept it.<br />

Rate the seller.<br />

Can You Guide Me Step by Step?<br />

Set up an Account<br />

Go To Fiverr® Home Page (the link will open<br />

in a new window) www.fiverr.com<br />

Click "Join" on the top right-hand corner<br />

Enter your email address and you will get a<br />

confirmation message<br />

Go into your email, look for the email. It may<br />

be in your junk or spam. Hit "Confirm".<br />

Then get familiar with your dashboard<br />

Purchase<br />

Choose your seller<br />

Review the pricing and options<br />

If you want to compare multiple sellers use<br />

the “Compare Services”<br />

Click “Proceed to Order”<br />

Check out the order details, if correct click<br />

“Proceed to Payment”<br />

Choose your payment preference and enter<br />

details.<br />

Your Gig® is ready to go.<br />

Enter instructions and/or details pn your “Gig®”.<br />

The seller will request details and I<br />

recommend you be as specific as you can.<br />

Enter details such as the size, color, content.<br />

Send images of what you like or want. The<br />

more information you provide, the closer the<br />

vendor's first effort will be to what you want.<br />

Sit back and wait for delivery.<br />

You will need to check into your Fiverr®<br />

dashboard for progress.<br />

Watch for information from the seller.<br />

The notifications will not go to your regular<br />

email.<br />

If you want to sell then you will want to fill out<br />

your profile.<br />

Review the delivery<br />

If acceptable rate your seller or if not, request<br />

Find your desired service<br />

the revision.<br />

Choose a custom heading from the choices If you are not satisfied, tell the seller. Typically,<br />

on your dashboard.<br />

they will let Fiverr® know and your money<br />

Enter it into the search field.<br />

will be refunded.<br />

Browse the services displayed. If you want, If not, there is an escalation process with<br />

you can refine the search results by things Fiverr® that is very reputable.<br />

like price or delivery time.<br />

Give Fiverr® a try. Start to buy or sell today!


TOP TIPS ON HOW TO<br />

MANAGE FEELING<br />

OVERWHELMED<br />

/ BY KIRSTIN KULUKUNDIS<br />

Let’s talk about feeling<br />

overwhelmed and provide<br />

some top tips on how we can<br />

best manage this dreadful,<br />

yet all too familiar, emotion.<br />

Dealing with overwhelm<br />

It may seem counter-intuitive<br />

to discuss being<br />

overwhelmed during the<br />

summer months, a period of<br />

holiday time for many. But it’s<br />

not. This is the perfect time.<br />

seems to be a natural and<br />

First, some of us are able to<br />

recurring part of our<br />

go on vacation. If we can,<br />

everyday life. We simply holidays provide reflection<br />

can’t avoid it in today’s world. time which is ideal for<br />

Because of this, it makes pondering better life habits.<br />

sense to take a moment to Also, feeling overwhelmed<br />

better understand its causes can come at any time, and<br />

even more so with heat, so<br />

and learn some top tips for<br />

the sooner we can be<br />

its management. These<br />

prepared the better. Lastly,<br />

pointers can help us all be<br />

this summer brings more<br />

our best.<br />

mounted stress than usual for<br />

many of us,


<strong>AT</strong> <strong>FORTY</strong> <strong>FIVE</strong> MAGAZINE /23<br />

Opportunities for many of us have been<br />

adversely affected by the pandemic.<br />

A familiar feeling<br />

Stress is acceptable in manageable doses. It<br />

can create a surge in intensity of focus which<br />

helps us accomplish a task. However, a tad too<br />

much and the effects are disastrous. The<br />

weight of being pulled down overpowers and<br />

productivity can crumble. The worse yet is that<br />

no matter how much life experience we have,<br />

these feelings of overwhelm will recur.<br />

Statistics say that over 90% of us have felt a<br />

sense of overwhelm at least once in the last 7-<br />

10 days. This takes hold like a surging wave<br />

instigated by something we could predict - like<br />

juggling too many responsibilities at the same<br />

time - or it can strike suddenly, triggered by<br />

something not forecastable. Overwhelm can<br />

also lurk as a constant, low-grade threat<br />

underlying the surface, present but not<br />

threatening until too late… ominous like a vine<br />

growing around our necks, slowly tightening.<br />

Either way, overwhelm is unwelcome and<br />

unpleasant. But it could be managed. Let’s now<br />

discuss how our brain reacts to overwhelm and<br />

provide helpful tips on effectively tackling it.<br />

What happens in our brain<br />

When we are feeling close to reaching the<br />

point of overwhelm, our brain seeks to resolve<br />

the situation and calm us down. I’m not a<br />

doctor but what has been explained to me by a<br />

Biologist is that is two things happen when we<br />

are feeling overwhelmed. Stick with me for this<br />

basic biology class because it explains a lot<br />

about our behaviour when in this state.<br />

First, our brain tries to reduce the demand on<br />

it, so extraneous noises which we can usually<br />

tolerate become unbearable (like footballs<br />

being hit onto your wall. That’s which made me<br />

lose my cool with one kid last week, something<br />

I still feel bad about).<br />

Second, when we are under pressure our brain<br />

relies on fast, instinctive processes to make<br />

decisions rather than slower, more analytic<br />

ones. That make us more likely to fall into old<br />

habits and also reduces our ability to be rational<br />

or problem solve. When feeling overwhelmed,<br />

we judge situations in basic terms, as good or<br />

bad, positive or negative. Life is not that<br />

obvious. In reality, things are rarely as bad as<br />

they feel when we are in that state of being<br />

overwhelmed.<br />

It’s important to remember that the negativity<br />

we feel when overwhelmed is a symptom, not a<br />

reality. When we calm down, our thinking brain<br />

kicks back in, and things don’t seem quite so<br />

horrendous. We feel more hopeful. When we<br />

take a breather, we literally feel better.<br />

So when the quicksand and level is rising ... or<br />

the vine around our neck is tightening… it<br />

literally is best to have a time out. Let’s talk<br />

about ways to tackle overwhelm in a minute.<br />

OK, so we understand now what happens to<br />

our brain when we are overwhelmed. We also<br />

get that we all live in a world where this feeling<br />

will reoccur. Let’s benefit by better equipping<br />

ourselves for dealing with this feeling by better<br />

understand its causes and learning some<br />

helpful pointers on what to remember when<br />

we are next feeling overwhelmed.<br />

Causes of overwhelm<br />

We all must learn to recognise our individual<br />

triggers which can make us feel overwhelmed.<br />

A classic for many is having too many balls in<br />

the air. Some of us may like being mega-busy.<br />

However, if we are not mindful, being occupied


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and engaged can quickly descend into feeling<br />

submerged in stress.<br />

Other common triggers for feeling overwhelmed<br />

include emotional trauma, financial stress, an<br />

anniversary of a loss or emotional benchmark,<br />

family friction, spending too much time alone,<br />

being yelled at or in a hostile environment, sexual<br />

harassment, health issues, our own internal<br />

expectations and dealing with change - a big one<br />

now that our routines and future plans have been<br />

affected by the pandemic.<br />

The bottom line is that our everyday life can and<br />

probably will include at least some of these stress<br />

inducers. So, let’s prepare ourselves and our<br />

families.<br />

Here are some practical pointers on how to<br />

manage overwhelm and stay away from the<br />

quicksand.<br />

HOW TO MANAGE<br />

OVERWHELM<br />

Tip 1<br />

When overwhelm sets in, let’s first remind<br />

ourselves of the following nuggets of wisdom to<br />

help ease the feeling.<br />

For ease of recall, I have labelled them “The R-P-<br />

G-Ps”. Let’s remember:<br />

* Real. Be aware these feelings are real: It’s our<br />

mind’s way of telling us we need to slow down if<br />

we want to live a healthier life. We should listen<br />

to this warning.<br />

* Positive. Get rid of the negativity. Let’s<br />

remember while our feelings are real, overwhelm<br />

is a simply jumbling of our thoughts, not a<br />

collapse of our life. We all have<br />

the power to control our thoughts. We can thus<br />

manage who we are and where and what we<br />

want to be. That’s important to understand and<br />

believe. When we are feeling overwhelmed, let’s<br />

remind ourselves that our whole life isn’t falling<br />

apart, just our thoughts are confused and need a<br />

rejigging, a re-prioritisation. We need to take<br />

some time out to purge negative, selfdeprecating<br />

emotions and thoughts. As we<br />

do this, we will feel renewed energy and more<br />

invigorated to take on the day.<br />

* Gratitude. This is important. The feeling of<br />

being grateful and appreciative is vital for<br />

mental health. Coaches often suggest clients<br />

write journals recalling what they are grateful<br />

for. This help being in “the present”. Gaining<br />

perspective on our problems is also important<br />

and can also augment gratitude. Perspective<br />

and gratitude are topics I will write more about.<br />

* Proactivity. When we feel overwhelmed, let’s<br />

first remind ourselves the “4 Be’s” and then<br />

progress to the following pointers to practically<br />

and proactively manage and emerge from this<br />

feeling.<br />

Tip 2<br />

Prioritise and Divide into Manageable Chunks:<br />

If thoughts and worries interrupt our daily rest<br />

time or barge into our usual activities, it’s time to<br />

prioritize. Let’s stop, breathe deeply and think of<br />

all the issues that are swirling in our heads that<br />

need to be tackled.<br />

I find making lists helps. This process allows us to<br />

identify the plethora of stuff that needs to be<br />

addressed and the act of writing it all down is<br />

cathartic. I swear there is some magical<br />

meditative power for me in list making. I will let<br />

you in on a secret - sometimes I add quick tasks t


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o my lists just to enjoy the therapeutic act of crossing off! Now we’ve made a list, let’s segment the<br />

whole seemingly mammoth mess into smaller, more manageable chunks. That’s the key: identify,<br />

divide (or segment) and conquer. When we understand all the components of our overwhelm and<br />

what needs to be done first, the job becomes doable.<br />

Tip 3<br />

Communication is important so we don’t feel isolated. Let’s tell other people how we are feeling.<br />

Share. Vent. Have a conversation, monologue, dumping session. This helps reduce our stress levels.<br />

Remember to balance communication with the adage “less talking, more doing”. We need to be<br />

aware that talking gets us only so far. At some point, proactivity needs to start.<br />

TIP 4<br />

Delegation is a key to survival. Often this sense of overwhelm is a result of feeling there is just too<br />

much to do. If this is the case, is there someone at home or work that we can delegate some tasks<br />

to? While it’s easy to think “it’s just quicker if I do it”, that doesn’t help us nor teach the others<br />

around us. We must learn to ask for and accept help.<br />

TIP 5<br />

We must remember our boundaries and keep them. Remember the expression “saying yes to<br />

someone else can be saying no to yourself”. Whether it’s accepting another project at work or<br />

social invitation or task we’re simply not keen on, saying yes commits us. Instead, perhaps we<br />

follow the strategy of “let me get back to you”, decide on our own time scale what we want to do,<br />

and then revert … but remember to!<br />

TIP 6<br />

For those of you who know me send The Next Half, one of the mantras is “Remember Recharge<br />

Time”. We cannot be any good to others if we are depleted. Staying recharged helps us both<br />

better manage when feeling overwhelmed and also prevent its surge. Let’s prioritize getting our<br />

personal reflection time to refuel, both to manage overwhelm when it surges and to also prevent<br />

its approach. Let’s get some fresh air, vitamin D3, and exercise, or take a nap, or see a friend<br />

TIP 7<br />

Let’s try to listen to our warning signs and try to head off any eruption. This loops back to knowing<br />

your triggers and paying attention to them. I’ll admit that I’m rubbish at this. But life is about<br />

learning and improving, so I will keep on trying.<br />

Now it’s time to walk with a friend and have a chocolate cookie! Life is good once again. Wishing<br />

you all a peaceful, overwhelm-free, contented, and productive week.


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