22.12.2021 Views

January 2022 Parenta magazine

You also want an ePaper? Increase the reach of your titles

YUMPU automatically turns print PDFs into web optimized ePapers that Google loves.

Creatively<br />

expressing emotions<br />

Managing children’s emotions can be problematic. We may lose<br />

our patience, feel triggered by their outbursts, or become reactive<br />

ourselves when they behave. Or act out in certain ways. We may insist<br />

that they ‘calm down!’ or patiently explain to them that their actions<br />

are unacceptable, only to be met with more difficult behaviour.<br />

Although children need to learn how to<br />

emotionally regulate, it’s also important<br />

that they are able to express what they are<br />

feeling, and for those feelings to be seen,<br />

heard and validated by us. That’s why<br />

it’s vital that we are able to self-regulate<br />

in those difficult moments; so that we are<br />

able to create a safe space where those<br />

feelings can be processed, expressed and<br />

released.<br />

But how an earth can you do that in the<br />

middle of the supermarket? I might hear<br />

you ask! And what about their incredibly<br />

bad behaviour!?<br />

All behaviour is communication! Those<br />

outward behavioural displays are coming<br />

from a need in the child to feel seen,<br />

understood and accepted. For example, a<br />

child might feel angry about not receiving<br />

an invite to their friends party; being<br />

unable to communicate or verbalise<br />

their anger they might lash out, become<br />

frustrated or annoyed. Or that anger could<br />

turn inwards and be expressed through<br />

self-criticism, judgement or self-harm.<br />

Emotions are doing a job, pointing to an<br />

experience, thought or feeling. It’s our<br />

job to give recognition to those emotions,<br />

so they aren’t suppressed, ignored or<br />

shamed. When we are able to welcome<br />

in every emotion without judgement and<br />

reactivity, that’s when the thought or<br />

feeling underneath the behaviour can start<br />

to come through and be expressed.<br />

Learning how to verbalise emotions<br />

through language takes time. (I’m sure<br />

you know some adults who still haven’t<br />

mastered the art!) So this is where<br />

creative expression can play a big part<br />

in supporting children work through,<br />

understand and express what they’re<br />

feeling.<br />

Recognise the feeling<br />

Children can get overwhelmed by their<br />

emotions and fearful of them. Teaching<br />

them that every emotion is welcome and<br />

is part of being human, can help to lessen<br />

the need for them to suppress how they’re<br />

feeling.<br />

Finding a time to play with emotions can<br />

help children to recognise them when they<br />

arise in the moment. One of the best ways<br />

to explore this is through drama play or<br />

improvisation: as it provides a framework<br />

where children can safely embody<br />

emotions within the structure of a game.<br />

The ‘Potato’ game is one of my favourites,<br />

as it gives children the opportunity to<br />

explore and exaggerate what an emotion<br />

feels like in the body. You can play this<br />

game with a group of children or one-toone.<br />

The aim of the game is to say the word<br />

‘potato’ in the style of an emotion. What<br />

would a shy potato look and sound like?<br />

A stressed potato? An excited potato?<br />

Embody each emotion, clench fists for<br />

angry, hunch shoulders for sad, move and<br />

smile for happy. Explore the realms of all<br />

the emotions through movement, voice<br />

and posture.<br />

Create without an outcome<br />

Learning to put outcomes and objectives to<br />

one side and be creative for the purpose of<br />

self-expression can be hard for us adults.<br />

When we conform to a structure or are set<br />

to an outcome-driven activity, like making<br />

a card, building a vase or creating a dream<br />

catcher for example, the child is limited to<br />

the structure and therefore has little room to<br />

explore their feelings.<br />

Not all creative projects need a final piece.<br />

Try moving beyond a structured activity and<br />

explore more expressive ways to create.<br />

Mark-making for example can be a great<br />

way to release emotions. Get a big piece<br />

of paper and stick it to the wall, then use<br />

paint, chalk, charcoal or felt tips, maybe<br />

exploring different art tools, like brushes,<br />

pallet knifes and sponges. Allow those<br />

emotions to be released in the marks, don’t<br />

be afraid to make a mess!<br />

Release the emotion<br />

Movement can help to shift and release<br />

suppressed emotions. You can use this<br />

technique with your child in the moment or<br />

retrospectively after an event or challenging<br />

situation. Take a nice deep breath in,<br />

stretching up to the sky with your hands,<br />

tense every single muscle. And as you<br />

exhale, release the hands down and shout<br />

“HA! “<br />

Katie White<br />

Katie Rose White is a Laughter Facilitator<br />

and founder of The Best Medicine. She<br />

works predominantly with carers, teachers<br />

and healthcare professionals - teaching<br />

playful strategies for boosting mood,<br />

strengthening resilience and improving<br />

well-being. She provides practical<br />

workshops, interactive talks and training<br />

days - fusing therapeutic laughter<br />

techniques, playful games and activities,<br />

and mindfulness-based practices. The<br />

techniques are not only designed to equip<br />

participants with tools for managing their<br />

stress, but can also be used and adapted<br />

to the needs of the people that they are<br />

supporting.<br />

Email: thebestmedicine@outlook.com<br />

Twitter: www.twitter.com/bestmedicine1<br />

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/<br />

thebestmedicinecornwall<br />

This exercise works particularly well for<br />

nerves or anxiety. HA! The feeling can go<br />

out the window, in the bin or down the<br />

toilet!<br />

For more information on how to playfully<br />

and creatively support children check out<br />

www.thebestmedicine.co.uk<br />

10 <strong>January</strong> <strong>2022</strong> | parenta.com<br />

parenta.com | <strong>January</strong> <strong>2022</strong> 11

Hooray! Your file is uploaded and ready to be published.

Saved successfully!

Ooh no, something went wrong!