V20 N18

Undertow
Terry O’Brien’s legendary column... social satire, shameless plugs — and general self-indulgence
Undertow: Now in year five as “temporary”
Exit Zero delivery driver. I
actually don’t mind being the delivery
guy. It gets me out of bed in
the (very early) morning and puts a
(very) few bucks in my pocket. I need all the
money I can get — I plan to fill my tank sometime
this month. I also come up with about
50% of my column while I’m driving. It’s
super-hard to type notes into my phone while
tossing bundles of magazines out my window
and steering with my knees, but I manage. It’s
also about the people I interact with, like...
Jerry Mancuso of Cape Harbor Shell.
Apparently, he really enjoyed my ribbing of
Steve Bistak a couple weeks ago. Alas, he did
not enjoy it enough to comp the rest of my
repair bill, but I’ll keep trying.
Scott Mann of Evolution Salon & Spa in
North Cape May came OUT TO THE CAR
to grab their bundle this week. You could all
learn a lot from Scott. Also, feels like I haven’t
talked much about Evolution this year. It’s not
you, it’s me.
Long-time friend Stephen Prince tried
to goad me into a workout from his new job
behind the counter at a gym that shall remain
nameless because I can’t afford to work out
there. But I have been hitting Planet Fitness
as regularly as I can, what with my rock star
schedule and all. I’m usually an elliptical man
but tried out the stair master the other day
and immediately regretted it because it’s hard
as hell but you can’t just hop off a machine
because it’s hard. I made it 10 agonizing minutes
then almost passed out furreal.
Balance yoga instructor Judy Heany was
at Boat Drinks Tuesday night. I think the last
time I saw her was on Valentine’s Day when I
was in a (very revealing) Cupid outfit. And she
was real close. Sorry about that. I’m still not
sure how it happened. But I TOTALLY want to
try yoga. Maybe one freebie and, if I don’t die,
we’ll schedule another one?
Alex and Lynn Sosik came to see me
TWICE this weekend at Exit Zero (with my
new steady, Jerry Kolber) and I don’t blame
them. We’re awesome. Then Alex mentioned
my joke about the potted plant barriers at Boat
Drinks and how they kept him from talking to
my former partner, Tim Joyce (now gigging
with Tom Naglee), when they went to see
him last weekend and I was like, uh, EXCUSE
ME!?! YOU’RE SEEING OTHER BANDS!?!
Why I never! (Also, happy birthday, Lynn.)
Speaking of Boat Drinks, if you’re lucky
enough to be there on a Monday or Tuesday
evening while I’m rockin’ with my boys Joltin’
Jerry Kolber and “Sugar” Dave Hughes, you
will also be lucky enough to hear my wife,
Cathrine, in the Terry O’Brien Trio. (I like
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Page 18 EXIT ZERO June 9, 2022
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June 9, 2022 EXIT ZERO Page 19