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scan.lancastersu.co.uk

S C

SCANLU

A

SCANLancaster

N

1

ROSES 23

STUDENT COMMENT AND NEWS

Established 1967 Week 26 2023

STUDENT MEDIA

FEEL ‘PRACTICALLY

INSIDE:

ROSES ARE RED!

INVISIBLE’ AT ROSES

After an intense weekend of competitions,

Lancaster have stormed to victory for the second

year running to claim the Roses trophy, with a 74

point lead. The energy in York from Lancs students

was unmatched, with some fixtures sounding just

as loud as a home game. To all the competitors,

a huge congratualions, whether you won, lost, or

drew, the weekend was really one to remember.

From Rugby to Ballroom dancing, a small team of

SCAN writers, and a handfull of guest writers have

created a full Roses edition.

SEE INSIDE FOR SPECIAL ROSES CONTENT

AMI CLEMENT | NEWS

CHIEF EDITOR

Across all of York and Lancaster

Media, 220 Student Media staff

took to the fields and floors to

bring you Roses 2023, but not

without sacrifice.

For our small team we tackled our first

away Roses since 2019 as our coach

arrived to collect us from town at

6:15am on the Friday of Roses.

On arrival we were greeted by our

York media counterparts and taken

to the maths building where we

have our media base, and later our

accommodation for the weekend.

As the only print media from

Lancaster, Gracie, the Editor in Chief

of Nouse, led us to the print hub, where

she personally had provided snacks

and welfare resources for us, as well as

maps and offered help with anything

we may need.

With the lead up to Roses being

unorganised, and largely coordinated

between media groups via a Slack

channel, things were getting more

tense. With important details like

transport, meals, and facilities out of

our hands as students, we all turned

to LUSU for answers. As Editor of

SCAN, I turned to the other two media

heads Station manager Erin Craine of

Bailrigg FM, and Station manager of

LA1TV Eve Harding to see how their

experience of Roses was.

‘Considering that the SU is responsible

for our wellbeing, I personally didn’t

see them very much over the weekend.

Any contact had was very brief as they

were not staying on site with the rest of

the students, and usually consisted of

them pointing us to YUSU, or not being

able to answer any

Is The University

Doing

Enough For

Our Mental

Health?

SEE PAGE 5

Creative

Writing

Competition

Winners

Announced

SEE PAGE 19

Couldn’t

Make It To

York? Catch

Up On The

Action Here

SEE PAGE 22

NOTABLE CONTRIBUTORS THIS ISSUE

AMI CLEMENT - AMELIA DANIELS - MARIA HILL -TOM JEFFREYS


CONTENTS

News

Comment

Arts &

Culture

Music

Screen

Lifestyle

Creative

Writing

Roses

1-6

7-9

10-11

12-13

14-15

17-18

CHIEF EDITOR

Ami Clement

scan.editor@lancastersu.co.uk

ASSOCIATE EDITORS

Maria Hill & Amy Brook

scan.associateeditor@lancastersu.co.uk

scan.artsassociate@lancastersu.co.uk

ONLINE EDITOR

Will Henderson

scan.associateonlineeditor@lancastersu.co.uk

NEWS EDITOR

John Whittaker

scan.news@lancastersu.co.uk

19-20

22-30

COMMENT EDITOR

Daniel Tham

scan.comment@lancastersu.co.uk

ARTS & CULTURE EDITOR

Caitlyn Taft & Jess Hasson

scan.arts@lancastersu.co.uk

MUSIC EDITOR

Will Doe & Megan Hargeaves

scan.music@lancastersu.co.uk

SCREEN EDITOR

James Wilson

scan.screen@lancastersu.co.uk

LIFESTYLE EDITOR

Alex Oswald & Harriet Shillito

scan.lifestyle@lancastersu.co.uk

CREATIVE WRITING TEAM

Amelia Daniels & Sky Fong

scan.creativewriting@lancastersu.co.uk

SPORT EDITOR

Tom Jeffreys & Josh Perrett

scan.sport@lancastersu.co.uk

The Editorial Committee above is responsible for

all content and production of SCAN. Compliments,

comments and complaints to be addressed to

Editor in Chief in the first instance. VP Societies &

Media, Danny Goodwin, is responsible for all legal

matters and significant reputational harm and can be

contacted at su.vp.societiesandmedia@lancaster.

ac.uk.

(Printed by Mortons)

A Letter From The Editor

This is SCAN’s first Away Roses issue, and

as getting people to York during exam

season is far harder than at home, we only

had a very small team covering the events

of the weekend.

Sleeping on classroom floors, twelve hour

shifts, and so many events to report on,

I am so incredibley proud of what we have

achieved with this issue. The day before, I was

writing some of my final year coursework due

over Roses, as well as fixing and setting up two

cameras for our writers to take with them to

take high quality original images to partner

with our reports.

This issue couldn’t have happened

without incredible levels of

commitment from our Sports

Editors, who took on the huge

responsibility of coordinating

coverage with the current writing

team, and guest writers from

various sports teams.

Originally afraid we wouldn’t get to enough

games to write full reports, in the end, we

actually had to cut out so many to fit everything

in, even after reducing most sections to only

two pages, to give more room to Roses.

All articles that couldn’t make it in this issue

will be available online, but understandably,

we couldn’t make it to every match.

As my final issue as Chief Editor,

this print edition means a lot to

me, as I know it will to many of the

writers and editors also graduating

this year.

The formatting team has grown this time, as

the future Senior Editorial Team undergo their

training, and I of course wish them all the best.

Following our Roses issue last year, SCAN

were awarded Highly Commended Best Sport

Section at the Student Publication Awards

in Glasgow, meaning we have one of the best

sports sections in the UK.

We are all so proud of this, but it gave us big

boots to fill this year, which I am confident

I have achieved, with a beautifulo and

proffessional looking newspaper, with a

variety of content, and high quality articles.

I want to express my appreciation for York

Media and all writers and editors who

worked on this issue, none of this would have

happened without all of you. If you aren’t sure

what to do to build your CV and experience

next year, I can not reccommend joining SCAN

enough.

Join the team by messaging us on

Instagram @SCANLancaster

or email me at

scan.editor@lancastersu.co.uk.

Ami Clement (@amiclement)

Uni News at a Glance

Marking Boycott

Announced

The university is

taking a “No

Detriment”

approach

towards any

delayed

marks.

If your

provisional

grade is

higher than

your actual

grades, you

will keep the

provisional

grade. If you

fail a module

that includes work

submitted after 17th March,

you’ll be entitled to an uncapped

resit.

To People Graduating:

If 75% of your modules have

marks, you should be able to

graduate. The university will

calculate a module grade if at

least 33% of the work has been

marked.

PhD Students:

The university has relaxed

the rules around progression

without confirmation of passing

coursework.

To Second Years:

You should be able to progress to

third year if you’re at a passing

grade, or the grades you have

make up at least 33% of a module.

To First years:

You’’ be able to progress to second

year if you finish the year with a

9.0 aggregate score. If your grades

come back and you have failed,

you’ll be offered a resit.

Graduation’s

Coming Up

Graduation dates

have been

announced.

They will be

from 18th-

21st July in

the Great

Hall. The

times and

dates range

from which

college

you’re in. If

you are unsure

on what time

you’re graduating,

check the University’s

July 2023 Timetable for

Ceremonies.

Before your graduation, you

need to make sure you have

everything in place.

- The right attire: It costs £39.60

to hire a cap and gown for the

ceremony. They are available at

the Graduation Attire’s website.

- Guest tickets: They’re free of

charge and students can request

two guest tickets.

- Graduation photography:

it will be located in the LICA

building on the day of your

graduation. You can pre-order

your graduation photography;

the prices range from £40-£110.

This service closes on Sunday

2nd July.

If you and your friends are

graduating on different days,

don’t forget to get the all iconic

University sign picture before

term ends.

EXTRAV

DATES

RELEASED

Extravaganza week begins on

27th June and lasts until 29th

June. For those who don’t know,

Extravs are 8 different parties for

each college.

It’s to say goodbye to the

academic year in style. Extavs

are full of fun events like live

music, games, and dress-up.

Here are the dates for each

college:

Tuesday 27th June: Bowland,

Cartmel, Grizedale

Wednesday 28th June: County,

Furness, Lonsdale

Thursday 29th June:

Fylde, Pendle

Save the date

for your

college,

or your

friend’s,

as the

themes

haven’t

been

released

yet. Keep

an eye

on your

college’s

social media

for the themes

in the next coming

Thank You

York!

We would like to thank our student

media counterparts, and athletes

from York for hosting this year, and

for being so helpful and supportive.

York student media took excellent

care of us, organising t-shirts,

scheduling, food deliveries, and

showing us directions around the

unfamilliar campus.

For SCAN personally, our print

publication counterpart, Nouse, led

by Gracie Daw, were Fantastic with

us. Organising a separate print work

room, welfare supplies, and even

decorating the room with red and

white roses.

The content that was produced by

our student medias combined was

fantastic, and every York athlete

I spoke to, was very

helpful, and enjoyed

discussing our

rivalry in a

friendly

manner.

Now the

pressure

is on for

a hatrick

f o r

Lancaster,

despite

the nature

of the

competition,

SCAN is excited

to work with such

a fantatsic media team.

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

3

N e w s

NEWS EDITOR:

John Whittaker

Lancs Student Media Left Feeling

‘Practically Invisible’ After Roses

albeit we acknowledge these didn’t have the

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1

social media handle tags on them for the

individual media groups.’

questions we had.’ Erin states

The LUSU spokesperson responds ‘All staff

remained on campus all weekend. We were

staying on campus and did not leave. There

was also a very large Lancaster Roses hub

one min away from the accommodation

where they were staying.’ Student media

did not know where the SU was staying, nor

was given an emergency contact, when the

Lancaster Roses tent hub was taken down in

the evening.

For some members of TV and Radio, they

travelled to York on Thursday to set up,

which meant another night on the floor. Erin

and a few of her team were informed at nine

at night on the Wednesday, that they must

get train a 12:57pm the next day.

Some of the team drove down on Thursday

with equipment, but as there was no bus

available for them, the SU paid for a train

instead. SU staff were also given guest

accommodation at York, meaning they had

beds and showers for the weekend.

But what did we ask for?

‘Our return to Lancaster

only announced on the day

we were due to leave and

described as a ‘free for all’.

The last coach left shortly

after the closing ceremony,

which we were not invited

to attend despite our hard

work the entire weekend.’

On transport the SU say ‘The transport

to and from roses is standard practice.

Due to the size and scale of the event – we

took approximately 3,000 competitiors,

spectators, volunteers and staff over to York

over the weekend which requires a large

number of vehicles, and the company we

used for the event and needing confirmation

details from them it was not possible to give

any of this information sooner. This was the

same for staff, spectators and athletes alike.’

In terms of provisions, we all felt extremely

let down by our hosts York University

Student Union:

‘The union’s responsibility

of feeding us was

entirely shifted onto us,

meaning one of our media

heads was left to make

sandwiches for three days

straight – with no hot food

or water provided. The only

thing provided for free was

Roses T-Shirts, which we

had to push the union for

despite the fact a lot of us

were working unpaid 12-

hour days for the union,

and they were only given

on the last day.’

LUSU explain: ‘The accommodation

provided for student media groups is

organised by the hosting University, therefore

York SU coordinated this, including checking

suitability, access to facilities etc… and we

operate on a trust and good faith system

with York as the hosts that the spaces are fit

for purpose. We did not have any decision

in where groups were allocated sleeping

spaces and will address this with York as it

is not what we would expect for any student

volunteer at the event.’

For anyone tuning in online, or

present at the varsity, it is

clear to see the levels of

professionalism provided

by YSTV (York Student

Television), LA1TV,

Bailrigg FM, and URY

(University Radio

York.) With crisp

quality footage

and committed

commentators

for half a dozen

simultaneous

livestreams, the

amount of work that

goes in to the coverage

of the three-day event

deserves ample recognition.

Eve Harding spoke on behalf of

LA1TV

‘There were issues with the

accommodation regarding

the showers and toilets

during the weekend.

There was no easy access

to water at the place

of accommodation and

around campus.’

During my time in York, these were issues

SCAN had as well. Each tap in the bathrooms

at York has a clear sign saying ‘Do not drink

the tap water’ therefore after the media hub

in the sports pavilion closed at around 9pm,

we had no access to water, as the maths

building had no water fountains.

As well as this, we were provided with

very limited food, no vouchers as had

been promised from York to Lancaster SU,

and self-fill sandwiches, proving largely

impractical for the media heads having to

deliver supplies across the campus. And

with extremely limited options to buy food

on campus, to this, the LUSU spokesperson

says:

‘York SU told us there

would be food available

for student media groups,

and we requested they be

given vouchers in advance

of the event however the

logistical arrangements for

food for those volunteers

is the responsibility of the

‘hosting’ university/union

and therefore it was not

in our gift to make those

decisions.’

Within all this, we must recognise how

incredible our York counterparts have been,

from providing us with food, directions, and

sharing tips, Eve praises

‘York media were very accommodating for

Lancaster from planning to running the

event. There were many meetings beforehand

to discuss the organisation of

the event and Lancaster’s

media team worked in a

close balance with York

through an executive

committee to involve

all of the society’s

lead members.

Professional

positions were

taken up with clear

responsibilities to

manage the event

well including welfare

and crewing positions.

Lancaster was given

priority to meal deliveries

and care, and there was the

easy communication with media

members through the dedicated Slack

channel. The network of support between all

of the media teams was amazing, and I am

extremely grateful for everyone’s working

manner.’

The entire student media team at York were

absolutely fantastic, both professionally, and

personally. Considering the majority of the

York and Lancaster Media teams had never

met, we could not have felt more welcome

and included in the wider team, so from

every attending member of SCAN, LA1 TV

and Bailrigg FM, Thank you York student

media.

As someone who took on a large role within

student media coverage of Roses, and

suffered greatly after due to burnout and

illness afterwards, I wanted to see if it was

the same last year. Erin describes:

‘The conditions we were

staying in weren’t the

best and I think all of our

emotional and mental

health took a hit from

that, which was then only

intensified by the aftermath

of not being acknowledged

for our work.’

To which LUSU acknowledge ‘being rushed

and requested to stop speaking and yet still

managed to thank them for the work. There

have since been social media mentions,

But as media heads we don’t just want to

complain and whine, we want action, Erin

describes how ‘We filed a formal complaint

with both the LUSU complaints manager

and their CEO, which was followed up

recently in a meeting where there were lots

of notes made and questions asked. It felt

like we were being listened to and advocated

for, which was a nice change.’

Eve is also looking to the future

‘I aim to be involved in

continuing the discussion

and motivate change to

ensure that the SU involves

the media execs in more

discussions and to meet

promised demands’

As this year was my final Roses, I am trying

to provide my future team with the best

resources they can have, now being involved

in a home and away Roses. However, for Erin

and Eve, they will be here next year, hoping

to see stark improvement, starting with the

officers and staff doing welfare checks on

working volunteers.

‘We didn’t ask for much,

but the bare minimum of

having our societies named

and thanked publicly

would have made a huge

difference instead of being

neglected and ignored the

entire weekend. […] Roses

is a fantastic opportunity

for people to gain industrylevel

media experience,

and having that highlighted

on the university’s/the SU’s

social media would be

great for both the university

and the promotion of our

societies.’

With all three Lancaster media groups

feeling ignored and unappreciated for all the

hard work, at a personal cost, the only show

of our own face were the logos on the back

of our media staff t-shirts, which neither SU

was involved in. York media designed and

organised these shirts, so each group was

named and recognised, since LUSU left Erin

and her team feeling ‘practically invisible.’

To support both Lancaster

and York student media follow

@scanlancaster @bailrigg_fm

@la1tv @yorknouse

@yorkstudenttelevision

@ury1350 @uoytechsoc

Front Page Image Credit: Ami Clement, Johnny Lau, Amy

Brook



4

N E W S

John Whittaker

NEWS EDITOR

Looking after our environment

and sustainability are

increasingly important

topics, especially among

students. With that in mind, what could

be better than taking a look at the main

environmental groups and societies from

Lancaster University and the University of

York in our very own “War of the Roses”?

Let battle commence!

Green Lancaster

Lancaster University has a wide range

of sustainability-oriented groups and

societies, but Green Lancaster is one of the

biggest. Set up in 2005, Green Lancaster

has four key areas of focus: Travel, Waste,

Biodiversity, and Energy. They have also set

up an ECOHub in Alexandra Park.

This year has seen Green Lancaster involved

in all sorts of projects across all four areas

of focus. At the start of the Lent Term, they

held a “Big Bike Sale”, which saw two local

bike resellers sell 79 second-hand bikes.

Green Lancaster also holds a weekly “Dr.

Bike” service, helping to repair and maintain

people’s bikes.

Over the last year, Green

Lancaster has also held

over 20 “nature-recovery

action days” and over 20

off-site field trips: all part

of their “ECOWoods”

and “ECOWild”

projects.

They have worked

with six external

partners across

Lancashire,

Yorkshire,

and

Cumbria,

wanting to

engage the

community

in nature

recovery.

Other

projects

from this year

include visiting

every flat in

the Graduate

and Fylde colleges

to talk to students

about energy, and their

SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

Do Red Roses Grow on

Greener Grass?

Over the course

of the year, the

University of

York EnviroSoc

hold events

“Don’t Ditch It, Donate It” scheme. The and green careers. County College, who

such as beach

“Don’t Ditch It, Donate It” scheme has been won this year’s event, will meet

clean-ups and litter

running since 2010, and has seen Green with the University’s Pro-

picks, charity shop

Lancaster work with charities to create a Vice-Chancellor for

crawls, and they

circular economy. As the name suggests, Sustainability, Simon

the scheme encourages students to donate Guy, to work out

even held a

their unwanted items at the end of the year. a strategy for

sustainable

In 2022, Green Lancaster redistributed implementing

fashion

over 31 tonnes of household goods to local their “ECOEats”

week.

charities and students.

idea.

Another Loss

For York: Long

Boi Pressumed

Dead

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

During the Roses weekend, rumours started

circulating about York icon Long boi, the 70cm

tall duck stealing the hearts and bread of York

students.

Anything not donated

to charity is sold in

their “ECOShop” at the

beginning of the year

and a total of £8,200 was

reinvested in the “Don’t

Ditch It, Donate It” scheme

in 2022.

But what has been their biggest success this

year? A Green Lancaster spokesperson said:

“Our greatest success, as always, is seeing

our student leaders and core members

develop their own skills in the sustainability

agenda. Over the years we have supported

hundreds of students who have gone on to

use their experiences with Green Lancaster

in their career after university. It is highly

rewarding as a staff team to work with

such a motivated and committed team of

students, and we are excited to hear

where the team of 2022-23 go

next!”

Of the

ECOChallenge

2023, they

said that it

has been

a “great

success”.

Students

from

every

college

came

together

to

present

their

own ideas

about how

to tackle

sustainability

issues, from

food waste, to

sustainable transport,

Rising to fame in 2019 for his height

compared to his fellow mallards, York

mascot Long Boi has gone national,

recognised by the BBC as a core piece

of York lore.

Whilst SCAN were at Roses covering

the varsity, student media groups

began talking and asking one another

whether they had heard anything about

a ‘fox attack’ on Saturday 29th April.

Rumours spread, and by the final day

of Roses everyone had pressumed

Long Boi to be the victim of the attack.

However, this was never confirmed.

For the

Roses

varsity

event,

Green

Lancaster

has

developed

sustainability

commitments

with Lancaster

University’s sports

teams. They have

made a carbon and

environmental impact audit

and encouraged more

efficiency in travel.

Going into the rest of this year and beyond,

the Green Lancaster team are recruiting

volunteers for their “Don’t Ditch It, Donate

It” project, as well as planning future

projects and events similar to those they

have done so successfully this year.

When speaking to SCAN, Green Lancaster

added: “There are countless ways for you to

join in the fun, tackle the climate emergency

and gain new skills.” You can find Green

Lancaster on Facebook and Instagram, and

you can sign up to their newsletter to keep

up to date about upcoming opportunities to

get involved.

University of York

EnviroSoc

University of York also have a wide range

of student-led environmental groups and

societies. One of the biggest of these is their

“EnviroSoc,” though it is closer to Lancaster

University’s Environment Centre Society

than it is to Green Lancaster.

The groundsmen at York University

hadn’t seen the duck in some time,

for about two weeks before the

competition.

A University of York spokesperson said,

given the lack of sightings, “we are

forced to conclude that he has passed

away”. (BBC)

With the home defeat of York being

the first in 38 years, and now the

pressumed death of campus icon Long

Boi, York have taken a serious moral hit

this term.

They also hold

the “pulling a

greener pint”

series, where

s t u d e n t s

get together

to discuss

sustainability

issues.

Other environmentoriented

groups

and societies at the

University of York include:

YUSU Environment and Ethics,

Beekeeping Society, Gardening Society, and

Fill Bellies Not Bins.

Conclusion:

Both universities have a diverse variety of

groups and societies dedicated to making

our lives kinder to our planet. The University

of York have a wider range of groups than

Lancaster University, but they don’t have a

single group doing as much for our planet as

Green Lancaster.

Everyone on campus has seen the green

shirts and the ‘Don’t Ditch it’ bins, solidifying

not only their presence on campus, but

showing the whole University that they are

busy bees over at GL.

It is for that reason that Lancaster University

is declared the victor in this “War of the

Roses”. Yet another Roses victory secured

for Lancaster!

To get involved with Green

Lancaster, check out their

Instagram @greenlancaster

Image Credits: Green Lancaster, @longboiyork

via Instagram

N E W S

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

5

“We Can scream For Help

But All We Get Told Is That

We Are Alone”: Is The Uni

Doing Enough To Support

Students’ Mental Health?

Maria Hill

ASSOCIATE EDITOR

TW: MENTIONS OF SUICIDE

The number of students who

reported experiencing mental

health problems has increased

sixfold since 2010, according to

a 2020 study published by the

House of Commons. The report

suggests that the escalation may

be due to increased financial

worries, alongside “difficulties

with academic demands”.

Mental health support has

become progressively more

important for University

students across the UK. On the

SCAN Instagram, we posted a

self-selecting poll asking ‘Has

exam/ coursework/ dissertation

stress ever affected your mental

health?’. 203 followers out of our

3,300 followers answered, with

93% of those who responded

choosing yes, their mental health

has been affected.

However, some students

have reported to SCAN

disappointment with the mental

health services provided to them.

A small percentage of the student

body, 44% out of 105 people,

chose yes on our self-selecting

poll asking ‘Have you ever been

ignored by the Uni’s mental

health team when reaching out

for help?’

In reply, Lancaster University

has stated: “The University’s

Counselling and Mental Health

Service receive large volumes

of emails and would never

intentionally ignore an email.

We invite the students to come

forward again and self-refer to

the service for support”.

The most common complaint

when it comes to mental health

care at Lancaster University is

how brief it is. When asked how

they feel about the Mental Health

support at Lancaster University,

one person stated “It’s not very

useful. They only really stay with

you for about three sessions if

you’re lucky”. Another student

stated that “Counselling is too

short, only short-term solutions”.

Currently, Lancaster University

provides only short-term help.

The Student Welfare page

confirms this: “Please note we

are not a crisis service, or a

replacement for NHS services,

and do not offer long-term

therapy”.

“Our students are very much

not alone in managing their

mental health,” the University

commented in a statement to

SCAN. “Lancaster has a team

of appropriately qualified staff

committed to supporting our

students as necessary.”

Further, they said, “The

team of mental health and

counselling practitioners

offers students evidencebased,

solution-focused,

therapeutic interventions. The

team is accessible to students

experiencing low to severe mental

health challenges but students

presenting with complex needs

beyond the boundaries of the

service or expiring severe mental

ill health are referred to NHS

mental health services”.

However, for many students,

six sessions with a counsellor is

not enough, with one student

confessing that their experience

with the service is “Generally

quite good, but a long wait time

and only four sessions with PTC

is often not enough”.

Lancaster University’s Moodle

also asserts “Our Mental Health

Advisors work with students to

help them manage their mental

health difficulties concerning

their time here at Lancaster

University”, offering a “range of

services through a series of selfreferral”

Our Instagram poll shows that

even getting a handful of sessions

with a counsellor is unpromised.

When asked “Have you ever been

ignored by the Uni’s mental

health team when reaching out

for help?”, 46 students 44% of

the 95 students answered yes.

Students have reported that

their emails have been ignored

for extended periods of time,

with a few claiming they did not

receive an email either at all or

after a long wait of three months

or more.

One student told of how, after

informing the Welfare Team

that they couldn’t make the

dates they sent them, they called

them during a lecture. They

emailed them again to cancel

an appointment November 8th

but didn’t receive an email from

them again until 31st May. “They

just left me on read,” the student

told SCAN.

“I was suicidal. I only

eventually got help

because my mum called

them up, and that help

was short-lived. I felt

completely alone,”

one student disclosed. This is

one of the many instances in

which SCAN was informed that

vulnerable students were left

without care. After trying to get

help for their housemate, one

student was left worried:

“My housemate was having

a mental health crisis and a

few of us contacted the Uni

separately trying to get him

help and months still on the

waiting list to receive a handful

of counselling sessions that may

or may not ever happen. They’ll

bring lamas into school but they

won’t act on the things that need

real resources. Someone in my

subject in a different year took

their own life and they offered us

therapy but that could’ve been

my housemate, and he got no

help”.

“By late February he really

spiralled and we thought he

might try and commit again as

he was in a really bad way and

I got in contact with my college

and the Uni to ask for urgent

help and they just referred him

to counselling again, to which

he still hasn’t heard anything

back from after six months [...]

it makes me wonder about the

recent people who have died

and whether they ever asked for

help”.

Despite one student claiming

that

“We [the student body]

can scream for help but

all we get told is that we

are alone’’

the feedback collected by

Lancaster University’s own

surveys suggests that:

95% said that staff listened to and

treated their concerns seriously

at all times, 81% said they had

confidence in the therapist’s

skills and techniques, 19% said

they had confidence most of

the time, 75% chose at all times,

and 25% most of the time, when

asked if they’d recommend the

service to others.

The University states: “We

understand that young people

are facing significant challenges

emerging from the pandemic

and financial challenges with

the increase in the cost of living.

We have put many mitigations

in place at Lancaster to help

students with their post covid

recovery and to support them

with their cost of living. If anyone

is experiencing disproportionate

challenges, we ask them to

reach out and contact Student

Wellbeing Services”.

In their statement, Lancaster

University also points out that

they operate in a stepped care

approach, with self-referral

forms being screened daily by a

duty practitioner who asses risk,

students have 24/7 access to a

phone line staffed by Spectrum

Life, and students can access

short term counselling, Cognitive

Behavioural Therapy, psychoeducation,

group work, safety

planning, and risk managing

support, and stress that CMHS

does not “provide treatment,

diagnostic pathways, or

medication oversight” which are

NHS responsibilities.

In comparison, Manchester

University offers a well-being

live chat and the number

of counselling sessions is

determined by the needs of the

students. Coventry University

has its own wellbeing app, the

University of Surrey partners

with ‘Pets as Therapy’ to bring in

puppies twice a year during exam

time, and Cardiff University

offers exercise referrals that

give students eight weeks of 1-1

support from a member of the

sports team.

It is not legally required for

coroners to inform Universities

in the UK when an enrolled

student takes their own life, and

the UK parliament has stated

there is “no mechanism by which

universities must record or

report student suicide rates”.

A recent petition, ‘Harry’s Law’,

created by the parents of a thirdyear

Exeter student who took

his own life in June 2021, calls

for this information to be made

public. Universities would have

to publish the suicide rate of

enrolled students annually, and

Universities would be placed into

‘special measures’ if their rates

exceeded the national average.

The UCAS website

highlights your rights as

a student to be provided

help ‘If you have a

mental health condition,

challenge or disorder’

stating that ‘providing

support is your course

provider’s responsibility’.

Wa y s To

Celebrate

Finishing

The Year

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

The year is almost over, breathe.

With the stress of exams and

deadlines almost a distant memory,

it is time to take care of yourself and

celebrate all your ahrd work.

1. Nightclub golf

With Generations, Vibe, and Sugar

all within walking distance, why not

bounce from one to another?

Sample the drinks in each, make

some new friends, and why not even

set up a points system with your

fellow club golfers (double points if

you don’t throw up once the whole

night)

2. Themed Party

Now the hard work is done with for

a few months, you might be moving

house, graduating, or going on a

year abroad, so what better way to

celebrate than a bit of fancy dress.

Dress as your degree, the cast of the

Super Mario Bros movie, or a classic

schoolies, although Extravs are

around the corner, make this your

own VIP event.

3. Quick Trip

If you’re heading back home,

whether that be down south or

abroad, you might not get the

chance to explore North anytime

soon. Hop on a Megabus to Glasgow,

a train to Windermere, or brave the

long journey to Newcastle for one of

the best nights out of your life, with

plenty to do in the day and at night.

4. Catch Up On All

You’ve Missed

Behind on your show? Couldn’t make

it out to try the newest restaurant in

town? Now you don’t have the fear of

moodle’s ‘Assignment Overdue’ page

looming over you, have a catch up.

Go see your friends who have also

been hiding away in the library since

before Easter, or just spend the week

alone with Netflix, a pizza, and your

pyjamas.

5. Go Home

Now you can be safe from the ‘how

are exams going’ questions, live rent

free for a bit. Enjoy being spoilt a

bit, not having to cook and see your

freinds from home. If you aren’t

graduating this summer, you don’t

know when you will have this much

non-uni time so make the most of it,



6

C o m m e n t

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

In most games at Roses, you will find many

games separated by Mens+ and Womens+

with a few mixed games between, but are

our female competitors at a disadvantage?

Menstrual health, and social expectations of

women, have affected women from a young

age, and across many different professions.

On average in the UK, a girl starts her period

around the age of 12-13 (BBC), which means

throughout most of high school, and all of

higher education, most girls and women

have to deal with the inconvenience, pain,

and expense of a monthly period.

With 90% of young women reporting they

suffer from painful periods, according

to Today, it is hard to both believe, and

ignore, the lack of attention given to women

during their time of the month. With some

suffering from underlying conditions such

as endometriosis, blood conditions, and

complications from hormonal birth control:

A day with a period is

more than just an average

day.

With women often suffering from ‘Gender

biases in estimation of others’ pain’ (The

Science Times) menstrual cramps and pain

plague every activity of the day, so when it

comes to commitments such as university,

work, and sports, why are women not

offered any help?

Recently, Spain became the first country

to offer up to three days of menstrual

leave a month for women suffering from

severe pain (BBC) but still the UK does not

offer anything similar in the workplace, or

authorised absences across Universities.

Periods are something

women are expected

to ‘power through’ with,

despite the mess, the

pain, and the expense of

sanitary products, since

they are now deemed a

‘luxury, non-essential item’

and eligible for 5% tax.

Despite the rising cost of living, and charity

initiatives to end period poverty, a quarter

of women still struggle to afford period

products last year (The Independent.)

In terms of social expectations, as well as

still acting as normal during menstruation,

women are expected to look a certain way

for work, and in certain sports too. Former

model and human rights activist Tara Moss

believes women’s appearance is ‘often an

expectation, with career consequences for

those who don’t ‘look the part.’

The double standard in place for professional

women is clear, and with Roses being the

biggest student varsity in the country, with

live streams, photographers, and hundreds

of spectators all watching, it is hard to

ignore that our female competitors have a

harder time competing.

The gender divide in competition is

one of current controversy, and for our

competitors at Roses this year, SCAN asked

female competitors if they believe they are

at a disadvantage, be that in comparison

to their partnering male teams, in mixed

gender competitions, or in general in the

training and lead up to big competitions.

Harriet Shillito, a competitor at this year’s

Ballroom dance event, stated ‘We need hair

and makeup done in a particular fashion,

and the judges’ attention is often drawn to

those with brighter dresses, or those who

“look the part!’ which overshadows talent

and technical ability for glitz and glamour.

‘It’s often the case that

judges favour hetero

couples over same-sex,

particularly female-female

partnerships. Male-male

couples are much more

visible than female-female,

so definitely get further if

they’re good!’

This places a level of homophobia, and

SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

misogyny over dance competitions, even

despite the traditional nature of the sport.

We have all seen the slick hairstyles, bold

make-up, and glittery dresses that female

dance competitors wear, but how many

male dancers have you seen with the same

high heels on, or a full face of foundation?

The traditional nature of the sport is

outdated, and adds an extra element to the

competition that overlooks the core of the

sport, dance.

One of the most popular all-female

sports in the country is Netball, and with

college games, and three university teams

competing at the weekend, I spoke to player

Heidi Bishop, and player and national

netball fan Maisie Otterburn about the

disadvantages of female competitors. Heidi

told us

‘I think growing up as a

female competitor in sport

you adapt to possible

physical limitations such

as menstrual health, and

learn to play the sport

with this in mind. But sadly

this carries across to the

sexualisation women face

when competing.’

As is standard for women in every walk of

life, these expectations to be slim, and meet

whatever standards society has deemed

‘beautiful’ that week, affects how we live.

Whether it is what to spend our money on,

how to spend the time, and who to associate

themselves with, women are held tirelessly

to such high and fluctuating standards.

‘I find it really

disheartening that

someone’s physical

appearance can override

any discussion about their

actual technical play. I

also think that women in

sports have always been

sexualised in whatever

sport they play, no matter

what they wear. Sadly

I don’t think this will be

something that will change

until there is a complete

cultural shift.’

This disheartening view of Heidi’s experience

with netball can be applied across the

board, as discussed with dance, but also to

many more sports. With the sexualisation

of women a constant presence and topic

for discussion, when given such a large

platform as Roses, it is almost inevitable

that competitors won’t fall victim to the

same standard.

COMMENT EDITOR:

Daniel Tham

‘It Can Defenitely Knock

Confidence’ The Reality of

Being a Woman in Sport

Although the cultural shift won’t happen

overnight as some of us may wish, Maisie

opened our eyes to some more issues

women face, but also some positive moves

in the right direction.

‘One because of obvious

issues like cramps and

feeling ill and all the other

thousands of symptoms

we can experience, but

also that it can definitely

knock confidence. There’s

the constant fear and

worry of leaking especially

if you’re playing in dresses

like the Uni netball teams

do or small shorts! It’s an

additional worry that you

really don’t need when

playing and it can change

the way you play as well

and I say that with firsthand

experience!’

In skorts or very small shorts most female

competitors can be observed playing in

across many sports at Roses, the fear of

leaking, bloating, and discomfort, is one

women’s fear when sat at home, let alone

playing a very active sport in front of

spectators and cameras.

Another interesting, and lesser-known

disadvantage women face, is an increase in

ACL (anterior cruciate ligament) injuries.

According to The National Library of

Medicine, women are three times more

likely than men to sustain an ACL injury.

Netball team Manchester Thunder has

teamed up with researchers at Manchester

Metropolitan University (MMU) to further

research the correlation between the

hormone oestrogen, and loose ligaments,

contributing to ACL injury. Although

women have been reporting these injuries

for years, it is astounding it has taken so

long for official research to begin.

The MMU team will also be tracking the

players’ menstrual cycles, physical sporting

limits, and muscle strength, to determine

why exactly female players are reporting

so many ACL injuries (Manchester World.)

Maisie says she is ‘excited to follow the

research, and hope they find an interesting

new angle that will help scientists, help

sportswomen.’

Free sanitary products can

be found at the Library,

The SU, and at all college

porters lodges.

COMMENT

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

7

Where it all Started: c.1455

Maria Hill

Unsurprisingly, Richard felt threatened, so do amazingly on Tinder? Well the Duke of

ASSOCIATE EDITOR

he did what all people do when they resent York, the youngest of King Edward III’s five

a family member. He banished his cousin to sons, had a descendant called Edward IV

Considered the largest inter-university

France.

who decided that he could do a better job

sports tournament in Europe, the Roses

than Henry 2×3.

Tournament takes its namesake from the Henry wasn’t having it though. He wiggled

15th-century civil war; the Wars of the his way back to the country while Richard Edward and the Yorks seized the throne

Roses. So, in celebration of Roses 2023, was in Ireland, probably to do some kingly from Henry in 1461, and then some nobles

here’s an attempt to simplify this tussle for stuff; although I like to think he was on a got fed up with Edward and gave the throne

the crown, with more family drama included spa retreat as TLC is important for both back to Henry. Then Edward returned

than an entire season of Keeping Up With students and kingdom-rulers.

victorious in 1471.

The Kardashians.

The first guy I’m going to

introduce you to is King

Edward III. He got around

and had five sons for whom

he created duchies: and

this is where it starts to get

complicated.

The oldest of these sons was Edward the

“black prince”, who died quickly and so the

throne was passed to his son, Richard II.

At the time, Richard was a baby, so three

of his uncles ruled the kingdom for him.

As he grew up, Richard started to lack

appreciation for his uncles’ help, and started

to instead resent their interference.

It’s said that Richard was a bit of a pushover

when it came to making decisions and

he wasn’t very popular. His cousin,

Henry Bolingbroke, (the son of Richard’s

eldest uncle, the Duke of Lancaster) had

much more charisma than him and was

considered popular and ambitious.

During Richard’s holiday, Henry utilised his

rizz again to gain support from nobles and

other important rich white folk, so, when

Richard came back, he was arrested. Henry

became King Henry IV.

Then Henry died and

Henry’s son, Henry, took

the throne, becoming Henry

V. Then Henry’s son Henry

had a kid named Henry

who became Henry VI,

otherwise known as the

‘Mad King’.

Henry VI lacked the rizz of the previous

Henrys and his campaigns in France didn’t

go well. Not to mention, he was often

bedridden for weeks at a time due to a lack

of sertraline and licenced therapists in

medieval societies.

People at court weren’t very nice in those

days, and instead of being sympathetic, they

questioned Henry’s ability to rule.

In the wise words of the

Chuckle Brothers, “To me to

you, to me to you”.

When Edward died, his son (can you guess

his name? Bingo!) Edward V was shoved

into the Tower of London before he could

be crowned. He was 12 at the time and his

uncle, Richard the Duke of Gloucester,

claimed it was for his own protection.

Little Edward V was discredited from ruling

and his uncle gained the crown, becoming

Richard III. Moral of the story? Uncles can

really suck.

However, people weren’t too fond of Richard

III. Then Henry Tudor from Lancaster came

along and raised an army and marched

on Richard. They clashed at the battle of

Bosworth and Richard was killed, hence

concluding the Wars of the Roses.

Or, as I prefer to call it, a

really bloody pass-theparcel.

For any keen history buffs amongst

you, a group of third year Shakespeare

students are putting on a performance

of Edward III at Lancaster Castle for

their end of year assessment. Telling

the story of Edward III’s conflict in

France, with hand-sewn costumes, flags,

and an Instagram so you can keep up

to date @luedwardii i. In collaboration

with The Duchy of Lancaster, The

English Literature and Creative

Writing Depoartment, and a group

of proffessional actors. Tickets can

be found on the Lancaster University

Online Store, with standard price at £15

and concessions at £10 (students do

count as concessions, don’t worry!)

Remember the king at the start, who would

War Books to Make you Weep

Maria Hill & Ami Clement

stealing the women and killing the men.

Red Queen by

ASSOCIATE EDITOR & CHIEF EDITOR

While we are snuffing around history, why

Song for

Aveyard

not delve in to a good book after your

Night by

If you’re into fantasy, this

exams, here we have some of our favourite

Abani

book series is an example

routed in reality, and fictional war books.

of skilled character and

War and

Peace by

Tolstoy

One

can’t

recommend books

that explore war

without mentioning

perhaps the most

famous one of all.

War and Peace

depicts Napoleon’s

military campaign

against Russia and is hailed for its accuracy,

as Tolstoy researched the wars thoroughly

and even visited some of the battlefields.

The Silence

of the Girls

by Barker

In her novel, Barker

explores the effects of

war on the voiceless

women depicted in

Homer’s The Iliad. It

follows the story of

Briseis. She is gifted

to Achilles as a prize

when he and his

army sack Lyrnessus,

Trained as a boy

soldier to detect

landmines in West

Africa, our teen

protagonist has his

vocal cords cut out so

his platoon can’t hear

his screams, should

he be blown up. An

emotional journey of conflict through a

childs eyes, you will be left in a sombre

mood.

The Boy In

The Stripped

Pyjamas by

Boyne

If you’re down for

a tear-jerker, I

recommend Boyne’s

masterpiece. When

the young son of

a German Nazi

during World War

II moves close

to a concentration camp, he befriends

an imprisoned Jewish boy Shmuel, in a

beautifully humanistic tale about childhood

innocence and the horrors of antisemitism.

world-building that’ll

grip you from start to

end. It explores a fictional

world where people are

segregated by the colour

of their blood. When

people with red blood

begin to gain power, war brews.

The Book

Thief by

Zusak

There’s a lot of

literature about

World War II, but

Zusak’s stunning

novel is highly

original and

beautifully written,

personifying Death

to poetically tell

the tale of Liesel

and her entourage

of friends who you won’t be able to help but

grow to love.

Song of

Achilles by

Miller

Based on the Trojan

War, this book tells

the tale of the famous

Greek hero Achilles

from the perspective

of his close ‘friend’

Patroclus. A more

fictional approach,

with visits from the Gods

and mythical creatures, this one had the

pages of my book damp with tears.

Persepolis

by Satrapi

Changing speed

with a graphic novel,

Persepolis tells the

tale of feminism

and marxism in

war-time Iran.

Amidst revolution,

self-discovery, and

religion, this one is

a bit more niche, but

still as relevant as

ever.

Image Credits: Maisie Otterburn, Ami Clement, Penguin, Hamish Hamilton, David Flickling Books,

Harper , Picador, Bloomsbury, Panyheon Media



C O M M E N T

8 SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

C O M M E N T 9

Lancaster vs York:

The Battle of the Alums

Sky Fong

CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR

Lancaster and York being long-time rivals

is no news, but has anyone thought about

pitting the alums from the two universities

together to see which university will come

out on top?

This article will include details of two

famous people in each category, and you

will decide which one is more iconic to give

a point to either Lancaster or York. After

three rounds of battle, you will find out

which university has the best alums.

ShowBiz: Andy Serkis vs

Peter Lord

Representing Lancaster University is Andy

Serkis, who studied visual arts and theatre

and graduated in 1985. During his third

year, he worked in the backstage team at

the Dukes to earn his Equity card.

Serkis is the eighth highest-grossing actor of

all time. He is most famous for his motioncapture

roles in blockbuster films, such as

Gollum in ‘The Lord of the Rings’ trilogy,

Caesar in the ‘Planet of the Apes’ reboot

trilogy, and Supreme Leader Snoke in the

‘Star Wars sequel trilogy’.

Serkis most recently portrayed

Batman’s butler Alfred in Matt

Reeves’ ‘The Batman’ and Kino

Loy in the Star Wars television

series ‘Andor’. He has also tapped

into directing with his directorial

debut, ‘Breathe’, in 2017 and, most

recently, the sequel to ‘Venom’,

‘Venom: Let There Be Carnage’.

Serkis is a show-biz legend, but his York rival,

Peter Lord, is not to be underestimated.

Lord graduated from York with an English

degree in 1976. During his time there, he

co-founded Aardman Animations with his

collaborator David Sproxton.

Aardman Animations is famous

for its stop-motion films with

plasticine characters. It is home

to ‘Wallace and Gromit’, ‘Shaun

the Sheep’, and ‘Morph’. Lord is

either a producer or an executive

producer for every Aardman

production.

Under Aardman, Lord directed ‘Chicken

Run’, the highest-grossing stop-motion

film of all time, and ‘The Pirates! Band of

Misfits’, which received an Academy Award

nomination for Best Animated Feature.

Additionally, Lord was made a CBE in 2006.

Journalists: Ranvir Singh

vs Greg Dyke

When it comes to the journalism sphere,

Ranvir Singh graduated from Lancaster

with an English and Philosophy degree in

1998. Singh is most famous for being the

political editor and newsreader for ITV’s

‘Good Morning Britain’.

Singh joined ‘BBC North West Tonight’ as

a journalist in 2005, and was promoted as

the main co-presenter alongside Gordon

Burns in 2007. She later joined the ITV

Breakfast programme ‘Daybreak’ in 2012,

the predecessor to ‘Good Morning Britain’.

Singh also participated in the

eighteenth series of ‘Strictly Come

Dancing’, partnering up with

Giovanni Pernice. They reached

the Semi-Final and were in fifth

place overall.

Singh’s rival is York alumnus Greg Dyke,

a media executive with a long career in

both print and broadcast journalism. Dyke

graduated in 1974 with a politics degree,

and was chancellor of the University of

York from 2004 to 2015.

Dyke held top executive positions

at television companies in the

1990s, including LWT Group and

Pearson Television. He was the

first chairman of Channel 5 and

later became the director-general

of the BBC from 2000 to 2004.

Dyke was also a director of Manchester

United and Brentford football clubs. He

later became the chairman of the Football

Association from 2013 to 2016. Since

2016, he has been the Vice-President for

Television at BAFTA.

Social Media Stars: James

May vs Phil Lester

Regarding YouTube, Lancaster’s

representative is James May. May left

Lancaster in 1985 and received an honorary

doctorate from the university in 2010. May

was a co-presenter of ‘Top Gear’ alongside

Jeremy Clarkson and Richard Hammond.

Top Gear’s YouTube channel has amassed

8.67 million subscribers with about 3.8

billion views.

After stepping down from Top Gear in

2015, May created his YouTube channel,

‘JM’s Unemployment Tube’. His first video

was called ‘Greensleeves with a hangover’,

where he performed ‘Greensleeves’ on a

recorder. He has posted multiple cooking

videos, including a five-part series on

Shepherd’s Pie.

His most popular video is from his DHL

box challenge series, ‘DHL box challenge

(No 4, medium) JC’, which features Jeremy

Clarkson struggling to fold a DHL box. The

vertical short video garnered a total of 2

million views.

York’s representative, Dan and Phil’s

Phil Lester, graduated from York with

a Bachelor of Arts and later a Master of

Arts in Video Post-production with Visual

Effects. Lester’s first video was his YouTube

vlog ‘Phil’s Video Blog,’ posted on his

main channel, ‘AmazingPhil’. The channel

currently has 3.91 million subscribers and

over 650 million views.

Lester is known for being a part

of Dan and Phil alongside Daniel

Howell. Their truth-or-dare style

Q&A video series, ‘Phil is not on

fire’, is successful on Lester’s

channel, with more than 11 million

views for ‘Phil is not on fire 6’:

Lester’s most viewed video on this

channel.

The duo also has a gaming channel,

‘DanAndPhilGAMES’, with 2.78 million

subscribers. Additionally, they worked on

a stage show, ‘The Amazing Tour Is Not

on Fire’, touring around the UK and later

in America, Australia, and Europe. The

duo did another world tour, ‘Interactive

Introverts’, with 80 shows in 18 countries,

one of the biggest YouTuber tours ever.

Who do you think

deserves to win? York or

Lancaster?

Image Credits: @andyserkis, @greatbritishmenu,

@ranvirtv, @kampalawalkingtours, @

jamesmaybloke @amazingphil and Lexi Joyce

A First Year’s

Experience of

Roses 2023

Lexi Joyce

WRITER

My first experience as a spectator

for Roses Weekend ‘23 at York was

filled with great food, weather, and

new experiences.

Surprisingly, the railway travel was

effortless, granted I booked in advance,

with a quick stop in Preston, my friends

and I arrived in York in no time. We

were certainly blessed with the sun so

we could wander through town and the

sporting events with no worries of soggy

hair.

In terms of events, I managed to catch

sight of the men’s 2nd hockey match, and

the women’s 1st, everyone played with

such passion and it was great to cheer

the Lancaster players on from the fields.

The food vans available near the sports

pitches were great for refreshments and

quick meals. The bubble waffles and

Korean chicken really hit the spot after a

full day of hearty support.

Because of the wide range of events, there

was always a decent place to observe

any match, even American football,

which was at the top of our priorities

to watch. I was intrigued to see how it

differed from football and rugby, and the

answer is very much so, but equally as

entertaining. Also managed to catch the

end of the men’s volleyball match, and

despite never watching the sport live the

atmosphere was so intense and everyone

was really getting into it, a great win from

Lancaster.

The levels of energy from York and

Lancaster fueled me with a positive mood

for the whole trip, as did checking the

Roses live results at every free moment.

I even had the chance to check out what

the city had to offer, even stopping by the

nightclub ‘Salvation’, which I was told

was similar to Lancaster’s ‘Sugarhouse’.

The whole club was filled with excited

and competitive people, joining forces

to celebrate Roses’ big return to York. I

really appreciated how Roses provided

enjoyable experiences of sports and

activities, especially the witty DJ’s

interacting with the crowds. I’m already

looking forward to what events and new

experiences Roses ‘24 has to offer.

A Day in the Life:

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

Drawing our attention to our opening

ceremony competitors, Lacrosse, as

someone who used to skip PE, I wanted to

know what is bootcamp really like?

For those that don’t know, most sports run

a ‘bootcamp’ over the weeks leading up to

Roses, allowing the team more time together

to practice, prepare, and bond before the

big day, which, as it goes, is normally at

least somebody’s final competition before

graduation.

Members were encouraged by Captain Ben

Grime to run 3km a day over the easter

break to prepare for the bootcamp, so as

not to start the weeks of intense training

with no experience. An average week for

Lacrosse includes training for 90 minutes

Thursdays and Sundays, with women’s

training held separate from the men’s, due

to their non-contact nature. Wednesdays

are often cleared for BUCs games during the

season, consisting of home games, and the

furthest away game being all the way up in

Newcastle.

During bootcamp there are 3 hours training

session typically consisting of 3 training

days and 1 rest day, which meant the

bootcamp lasted about two weeks, but with

more frequent rest days than previous.

But is that enough, Ben Grime told us a

week before Roses he felt his team were

‘absolutely’ prepared for the opening

ceremony.

‘We had 2 weeks of

‘bootcamp’ with about 15hours

of lacrosse per week. All of us

had been on a drinking ban for

the past month, so everyone

was prepared the best they

could have been’

Women’s Captain India Cooper-Clark

also told us how the women’s team were

preparing, and it is clear that there is

no gender bias in Lacrosse, with both

teams taking it very serious ‘Our intensive

bootcamp really allowed us to focus on

refining our skills and fitness that we had

been working on all year as well as bond as

a team.’

With both teams on a strict drinking ban,

striving for that post-victory night out in

York is certainly a good form of motivation,

exploring a new city, getting to meet the

York team, and sample whatever York’s

equivalent of 3-4-6 VK’s at Sugar is.

Lacrosse Start

Roses with a

BANG!

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

Lacrosse were our opening ceremony this year,

and with all the prep leaading up to the varsity,

Lax raised our spirits and energy very early on

with red smoke and the Lancashire flag.

Roses Bootcamp

I asked the Captains, how it felt being

president of the team leading the opening

ceremony, with the cameras, spectators,

and the rest of the club watching, there is

a lot of pressure for the team to secure an

away win early on.

‘The energy from the team

was fantastic. Everyone was in

great spirits and knew what was

expected of them. Being the

president of this team was an

honour, I’ve known a lot of the

lads now for 3-4 years, so I was

With an intense, and evenly

paired match, Mens Lacrosse

took to the pitch with their

now signiture smoke flare,

ready to claim the four points

for Lancaster. The boys were

hoping for a third consecutive

season win against York, and

fourth Roses win in a row.

With a tense game of catch

up, each time York scored,

Lancaster caught up, and

vice versa. There were plenty

of excellent saves from

Goalkeeper Josh Perrett,

really happy to be able to play

in an opening ceremony game

alongside them.’

It is clear from my experience following

Lacrosse over the last two Roses

tournaments, that this team, in its nature

is so close and supportive of one another.

They aren’t afraid to scream at one another

on the pitch, and smack each other with

their sticks during training, but off the pitch

it’s all pints and group huddles.

For the women’s team ‘It was a shock!

Lacrosse is a pretty niche sport and does

and fantastic goals from our

MOTM, and Captain Ben

Grime. In the final three

minutes, Lancaster managed

to take the lead, and win the

match, awarding a proud four

points for Lancaster.

Y 6 - 7 L

Next up, we have Womens,

hoping to follow up that

energy with another win. The

Mens team sat and supported

from the sidelines as the

women kicked off with a 1-0

lead.

Unfortunately, that buzz was

short- lived, with an incredible

performance from the

Lancaster women, York took

the lead. These lot are tough,

and didn’t let it dishearten

them, as they continue the

game with confidence and a

fierce defense.

READ MORE SPORT

ON PG 23

not get a lot of recognition and finding out

that it had been selected for the opening

ceremony was such a big surprise. I think

there was a lot of excitement as well after

the initial panic as it is such a huge platform

to introduce and show so many people what

the sport is.

As I outlined last year in our Roses issue,

Lacrosse is definitely one of the more niche

sports on campus, but gaining such a large

crowd last year, they were invited to be the

opening ceremony game in York. Ben was

‘thrilled’ for his team

‘This my 4th and last year and

at university and in Lacrosse,

so I knew it would be a

fantastic way to wrap it all up

and end on a high.’

For lots of competitors, this year will have

been their final Roses, as 2020, and 2021

were cancelled due to the pandemic, for so

many, including myself, my first away Roses

is also my last entirely. With the bittersweet

note of knowing this game is your last, it

goes to show how much sport means to so

many Lancs students.

Especially for the Women’s team, India

outlined how this was so special

‘I think going onto that pitch

there were a lot of nerves

having never played in such

a huge crowd and none of

us having experienced an

away Roses. From the first

draw the team showed such

determination and spirit until the

end having scored twice and

keeping York from racing ahead

with goals.’

With recent years of competition slightly

disjointed following the pandemic, and so

few people experiencing away Roses before,

it is safe to say that York didn’t intimidate

Lacrosse very much. Training harder than

ever and excited to play away in front of

such a crowd, although nerves were high,

their determination was even higher.

Image Credits: Ami Clement, India Cooper

Clark

The crowd never gave up on

the girls, with a sea of red

cheering their support.

Despite the perseverence, the

girls lost the game, but not

their smiles. Still celebrating

with the men, and happy to

have played another Roses as

a team.

Y 11- 2 L



10

SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

Arts & Culture

ARTS & CULTURE EDITORS:

Jess Hasson

& Caitlyn Taft

What Makes Sports Societies

Different to Regular Societies?

Caitlyn Taft

ARTS AND CULTURE EDITOR

University culture centres around fitting

into social groups. It’s important for

people to find their “clique.”

Societies opens up that opportunity for

people, being able to explore new hobbies.

There are two types of societies you can

join: Sport clubs and societies. Both

types overlap frequently. They both go on

socials. They both might partake in pub

golf. They both have interested members

who love the society.

With some sports clubs,

there are different teams

on campus for each

college. Each college

has their own netball

and football teams. Most

sports also have a coach

for training making sports

clubs are a great way to

meet like-minded people

who are passionate about

the same sport as you.

There’s no skill limit for most sports club,

for example most sports clubs have training

sessions for their new members. This isn’t

seen in societies as they take less physical

power than sportspeople in sports clubs.

With societies, you can build more networks.

If you join a society based around something

you want to do after university, you might

be able to build relationships that will lead

to future opportunities. You can put most

clubs and societies on your CV to show the

skills that you’ve developed or gained during

your time at university.

I spoke to Will Dove, president of the Canoe

Club. He told me about his club and how

1. It’s competition day,

what’s first on the list?

Early bird, you have got to

look good, and this takes

time

important the funding for his club is for

newer and more equipment:

“The new funding that

we’re getting from the SU

will allow us to buy new

kit, buoyancy aids, and

new helmets. Our kit right

now isn’t enough to supply

everyone, so people end

up missing out on some

sessions.”

“We normally have sessions in the Sport

centre’s pool. We teach basic paddling skills

and play games. The funding from the SU

will help us supply more members with

equipment and make sure our equipment

follows safety procedures.”

2. Exams are over,

what’s next for you?

A A A

After a good breakfast,

mirror to prepare

to the

I need a nice brainless

friends

with my

B

Pre-workout first. Shower

This calls for a celbration,

B it is B

C

C

Which Sport

Society Are You?

The heels are on, Sugar is

open, and it’s 3-4-6

I asked him what a typical night out looks

like for him and his sports club, to see

whether socials for societies and sports

clubs are similar:

“We start in Spoons and

then we go to someone’s

flat for a bit and drink. If it’s

Wednesday, we normally

end up in Sugar. For

socials, we do pub crawls

and other joint activities

with other societies.”

Many sport societies have a great sense of

sportsmanship and community. They rely

on their teammates, whilst this may not be

necessarily seen in regular societies.

The Canoe Club also partook in Roses.

3. Eyes on you, how are

you looking?

C

Mostly A’s -

Debating

You have your head screwed on

right, and always focused on the

task at hand

Focused, resting bitch

face for concentration

A little sweaty, but 100%

ready to roll

Always photo ready, every

side is my good side

Mostly B’s -

Boxing

You have got to keep fit, and even

if you smell, no one will mess

with you

Experiencing Roses, and winning their

matches, not only heightened this feeling

for many sport societies but brought them

together in a real sporting match.

The sense of community and the feeling of

accomplishment are in every society. This

makes both types of societies very similar.

People are proud of their societies, and

they’re proud of their hobbies. It just so

happens to be the sports clubs who cheer

the loudest.

Image Credit: Lancaster SU

Is Your Sport or

Society Doing

Something

Amazing Soon?

Got a big trip? Important

Game? Fundraiser?

Showcase? Something

you want people to know

about?

Contact us and

we will come see

what you’re up to!

@scanlancaster

OR

Why not write

for SCAN? Join

now and email

scan.editor@

lancastersu.ac.uk

4. How are you

celebrating your win?

A

B

C

A quiet drink at the pub

with the team

Pints upon pints, with a

dinner of champions

Winners need pictures,

and a group hug

Mostly C’s -

Cheerleading

Go for gold and look good

doing it, there’s always cameras

watching

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

11

Art, Conflict, and War:

‘Can We Imagine Violence Without Art?’

Maria Hill

ASSOCIATE EDITOR

From breakup songs to films that make us bawl our eyes

out, art allows humans to transform their pain into a medium

which makes us feel seen, encouraging reflecting and

change. Since we are looking at our varsity, and the historic

routes of the War of The Roses, it feels right to aknowledge

infamous conflict themed art.

In his book The Aesthetics of Violence, Robert Appelbaum

asks, ‘can we imagine violence without art?’. During the

Second World War, 300 artists were commissioned by the

War Artists Advisory Committee (Tate), proving Appelbaum’s

argument that art ‘provides a space in which we can think

what would otherwise be unthinkable’ is correct.

In this article, we will look at a range of art that protests and

processes the horrors of war, using the definition of ‘a state

or period of fighting between different countries or groups’

(Britannica).

Picasso stated,

Guernica by Pablo Picasso

“the artist is a receptacle for

emotions that come from all over

the place: from the sky, from the

earth […] from a spider’s web”.

This is true for Picasso’s ‘Guernica’. Commissioned for the

1937 Paris Exhibition, it’s a statement against fascism and

the barbarity of war to educate on the bombing of Guernica

during the Spanish Civil War. It’s considered one of the

greatest anti-war paintings ever created.

Guernica is a black-and-white painting that uses cubist

elements. Cubism was an art movement pioneered by

Picasso in the 19th and 20th century and was inspired by,

and arguably appropriated, African art.

The style creates fragmentation, reflecting the chaos of war

and depicting a central figure of a woman crying over the

body of a dead child, people and animals in varying states of

suffering surrounding her.

Witnesses: Against Our Vanishing by

varying artists

‘Witnesses: Against Our Vanishing’ is a 1989 art exhibition

organised by photographer Nan Goldin, selecting a range of

artists affected by AIDS during the AIDS epidemic.

The exhibition was created to show images outside of

heteronormativity that was positive during an era in which

members of the gay community were “being chucked out

on the street by landlords and roommates” (Whitaker, The

Guardian).

Homophobic press campaigns

labelled AIDS as the “gay plague,”

and there was a “paranoia that

characterized the lack of viable

political response to the AIDS crisis”

(Barbara Reisinger). Due to the stigma, many people died in

isolation and without proper health care.

Created to reflect upon the artists’ personal experience

with the AIDS epidemic rather than an act of protest. The

exhibition included a range of artwork from photography

to paintings from artists such as David Armstrong to Geer

Lankton.

Cut with the Kitchen Knife Through the

First Epoch of the Weimar Beer-Belly

Culture –

by Hannah

Hoch

Hoch has said she

“would like to show

the world today as

an ant sees it and

tomorrow as the

moon sees it”.

Her 1919 artwork

certainly plays

with this idea of

perspective. By

cutting out and

sticking together

photographs from

different German

publications, Hoch’s

‘Cut with a Kitchen Knife’ is a photomontage. It features the

faces of German politicians, alongside popular Dadaists of

the time, to create a political and feminist commentary.

“It was not very easy for a woman to

impose herself as a modern artist in

Germany,”

Hock stated. The title ‘Kitchen Knife’ connoting the gender

divide within art at the time.

Instead of using her signature, Hoch places a small cut-out

of her own portrait in the right hand corner, pasted onto the

corner of a map which shows the countries that had voting

rights at the time.

Dada was an art movement created during the interwar

period to protest the ideologies, including nationalism,

which lead to the First World War. The photomontage was

extremely popular with Berliner Dadaists in particular to

create social critiques. This style reflects the chaos of war.

Mural for George Floyd by @mr.detail.

seven and @bankslave on Instagram

In the two years following George Floyd’s murder by a

Minneapolis police officer, roughly 2,700 pieces of street art

were created supporting the Black Lives Matter Movement

around the world (Time). The art includes portraits of Floyd,

alongside his last words, the BLM symbol of a raised fist,

and also portraits of other African Americans murdered by

police officers.

ARTS & CULTURE

Street art and murals can “promote

conversation and highlight social,

political and environmental issues

and has always been a powerful

platform to convey messages to the

masses”

(Graffiti Street). They have often been used as a form of

protest and social commentary.

This particular graffiti mural stands in Kibera, Kenya,

and is a joining of art styles between two different artists,

showcasing @Mr.Detail.Seven’s bold colours and stand-out

text, and @Bankslave’s talented portraiture.

The Face of War by Salvardor Dali

Salvador Dali was a major surrealist artist who tapped

into the subconscious and dream state to create powerful,

eerie images. Dali often tapped into this state by using a

“paranoiac-critical” technique, inducing himself into a state

of paranoia to open up his subconsciousness.

‘The Face of War’ was painted during the start of World War

Two in 1940 and can be viewed as Dali’s response to the

trauma he gained from what he experienced in the Spanish

Civil War. The painting showcases distorted, hollow faces in

agony, reflecting soldier and civilian suffering.

Image Credit: Picasso, Francis Miller Smith available on Artist

Space, Hannah Hoch, Readers Digest, Salvador Dali



12

M u s i c

MUSIC EDITORS:

Will Doe &

Megan Hargeaves

The Battle of The Bands

Will Doe

MUSIC EDITOR

As our brave sporting heroes stride onto enemy land, ready to conquer both

Yorkshire Uni and Yorkshire beer, I do wonder whether trouncing the White Rose

comes just as easy in areas other than on the campus playing field/15th-century

battlefield. Does the music of mighty Lancashire stand tall against the fiendish

county of Yorkshire? Well, today we find out once and for all. Let the hotpot meet

the pudding; it’s the battle of the bands.

The Indie Legends:

The Courteeners vs Arctic Monkeys

A strong start from both sides as two indie powerhouses of the 2000s come

to battle. Manchester’s Courteeners (we’re calling Manchester a red rose

county right?) have become local icons to the young masses with their smash

indie hits, Not Nineteen Forever and, erm…the other ones…? Sheffield’s

own Arctic Monkeys have long flown the nest to worldwide success. With

bangers such as Do I Wanna Know, Fluorescent Adolescent and Mardy Bum,

I’m afraid I can only see one winner here.

Red Rose 0-1 White Rose

The Pop Powerhouses:

Take That Vs Ed Sheeran

A match-up as perfectly suited as regurgitated alcohol is to a Sugarhouse

cubical, this one does make me shiver. Manchester’s 90s heart-throbs Take

That are your dodgy aunt’s favourite boy band, whilst Halifax’s own, Ed

Sheeran, doesn’t have any fans (admit it, you’ve never met one.) Yet he

continues to plague our radios and charts. I’m gonna give this to Take That, as

despite harbouring a Gary Barlow, their big hit Shine is still a classic.

Red Rose 1-1 White Rose

The Grime Match-Up:

Bugzy Malone Vs Bad Boy Chiller Crew

SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

The Wildcard:

The Lancashire Hotpots Vs Heaven 17

For this wildcard round, I chose two very different bands, but both with

equal intrigue. The Lancashire Hotpots have made quite the name for

themselves to the local masses, sporting musical triumphs such as Chippy

Tea, and Eggs, Sausage, Chips & Beans. Sheffield 80s synth wizards Heaven

17 equally went down some interesting routes. Outside of their main club hit

Temptation, the group went down some ironic political lanes with Let’s All

Make A Bomb and (We Don’t Need This) Fascist Groove Thang. Despite my

admiration for Heaven 17, I don’t want to lose my Lancashire citizenship, so

the Hotpots claim this one.

Red Rose 3-2 White Rose

The Heavy-Hitters:

Massive Wagons Vs Def Leppard

Yorkshire has pulled out a big gun here, and whilst Massive Wagons fly the

flag with pride for the town of Lancaster, I think even they would submit to

the 80s glam rock powerhouse that is Def Leppard. But you never know, give

the Massive Wagons a couple more decades, and a weird 80s glam rock revival

in the 2030s, and maybe they’ll be able to turn Def Leppard into just another

dead leopard.

Red Rose 3-3 White Rose

The 80s Round:

The Smiths Vs The Human League

One band has stood the test of the decades with its timeless post-punk,

and the other is a criminally underrated synth-pop outfit. The Smiths have

enough hits and acclaim to put them up there as one of the greatest bands of

the UK, let alone Manchester- despite Morrissey’s best efforts in recent years

to muddy those waters. Sheffield’s The Human League may only be known

for a couple of karaoke hits, but their discography is actually pretty solid.

Shoutout to their deep cut Seconds, it may just be the best synth-pop track

out there. Despite my love for The Human League (and my general disdain

for Morrissey) it’s hard to see The Smiths not taking the win here.

Red Rose 4-3 White Rose

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

13

Lanchasire

and Yorkshire

Artists to Look

Out for

Caitlyn Taft

ARTS & CULTURE EDITOR

With the hype of Roses being red still

burning bright on campus, you may

want to listen to some music from

Lanchasire or Yorkshire. If so, here

are some Lancashire and Yorkshire

artists to keep an eye out for.

The Orielles

From Halifax, West Yorkshire, indie

rock band, The Orielles, gained

popularity with their old-school

appeal. This band is undoubtedly

experimental and have continued

to change their sound with each

passing record. Their newest album,

Tableau, moves away from the cheery

indie pop that they were originally

known for and embraces a more

“psychedelic” style. Yet, it still makes

for a brilliant listen! Their hit song

“Sunflower Seeds” from their 2018

album “Silver Dollar Moment” is a

personal favourite of mine. It has such

a nostalgic and summery vibe to it!

The Empire Police

How To Make the

Perfect Gym

Playlist

Megan Hargreaves

MUSIC EDITOR

While there may be a (very) select few out

there who revel in the zen of a silent gym

session- for the vast majority of us, music is

an integral part of our workout. And with good

reason!

Studies have shown that listening to music

whilst exercising elevates mood, distracts from

fatigue, and even reduces the amount of effort

that you feel like you’re putting in! So, having

a queue of music ready to accompany your

workout seems like a no-brainer. But what

kind of music should you choose?

How About Club Classics?

What better soundtrack would there be to

accompany a particularly heart-pounding

session at the gym, than a playlist of club

classics? These high-tempo, bass-heavy

bangers are useful for more than just a night

out at The Sugarhouse, they’ll provide you with

the adrenaline boost needed to sustain a great

workout.

My personal favourite club classic to listen

to at the gym is The Magician’s remix of

Lykke Li’s “I Follow Rivers”– I save this track

specifically for when I can feel my motivation

failing, and after a listen I almost always feel

re-energised!

Or Rock Legends?

In a similar way to the club classics, I find that

turning on bands such as “Sex Pistols” or “Foo

Fighters” when working out always leaves me

feeling strong, powerful and motivated.

The heavy guitar and pounding drums

of Royal Blood’s “Figure it Out” and the

angry, passionate lyrics of Rage Against the

Machine’s “Killing in the Name of”, could keep

me going for hours on end- and make me

feel like I can crank the speed settings on the

“Stairmaster” to the highest they’ll possibly go

(not recommended.)

Maybe Listen to your

Favourite Artist?

Admittedly, when you find yourself in the

throes of a particularly intense workout,

sometimes all you need is a bit of comfort- and

what better to provide this than a playlist full

of songs by your favourite artist?

My favourite musical comfort food comes in

the form of The 1975, and when I find myself

tired and sore in the middle of a gym session,

playing any song from their first, self-titled

album, always manages to keep me going

strong.

Ambient Synthwave Bliss:

Although all of these genres would fit perfectly

into a gym playlist, my absolute favourite

music to listen to whilst working out are the

beautiful and ambient tracks of artists like

Aphex Twin and Home. This might seem like

a bit of an oddball choice for a gym playlist,

these songs often tend to be a lot more quiet

and subdued.

Yet I find that the calming, mellow melodies

of these songs really help me to relax into an

exercise routine and maintain a level of focus

that I wouldn’t normally be able to.

Like our suggestions?

So, there really are rules when creating a

gym playlist, it all just depends on the type of

workout that you want to get done and the kind

of music that motivates you. So, experiment!

Making a dedicated gym playlist is not only a

way to improve the quality of your exercise, but

is also a great way to explore new genres that

you maybe wouldn’t otherwise listen to.

Listen to the full playlist here!

MUSIC

The Pigeon

Detectives

I couldn’t resist putting one of my favourite

bands in here! Though the Leeds band’s

2007 album, “Wait for Me” is insanely

popular, their newer singles and albums

sadly haven’t seemed to have received the

same kind of attention. My favourite track

from “Wait for Me,” is ‘Take Her Back’, it’s a

late 2000s British rock classic for me. Last

month, they uploaded their first piece of

music since 2017. “Falling to Pieces” is a less

upbeat track compared to what originally

made the band popular- but the lyrics are

gorgeous, and the guitar riffs are amazing.

Mr. Ben & The

Bens

Beginning in a Lancaster barn as a

recording project, Mr. Ben & the Bens is

not your typical indie band. “Hey Blues” has

Ben Hall’s soothing voice in the foreground

as it ends with a quirky synth that fits the

song beautifully. Their 2022 album ‘Good

Day for Drying’ is worth a listen as each

song is uniquely different. I truly think it

is their best album to date and I can’t wait

to see what else this underrated gem of a

band has in store.

Knuckle

Whilst I do find the Bradford bad boys of Chiller Crew absolutely hilarious

(with a few garage classics to boot), I’ve got to give it to Bugzy here. Partly

because his ‘fire in the booth’ episodes are indeed fire, and I’d also rather

not get on his bad side.

Red Rose 2-1 White Rose

The Femme-Fatale Face-Off:

Atomic Kitten Vs Girls Aloud

This one’s gotta be an easy one. I was struggling to find a girl band from

the north west. Eventually, I settled for Merseyside’s Atomic Kitten- and

whilst ‘Southgate you’re the one’ still fills me with summer 2021 nostalgia,

the scouse trio can’t compete against the might of Girls Aloud. Yes, I’m

bending the rules a bit here, but with member Kimberley Walsh coming

Red Rose 2-2 White Rose

The Brit-Pop Bash

The Verve Vs Pulp:

This is the decider. Will Lancashire claim their victory? Or can York pip

them back to a stalemate? Of course, it’s my hometown pride, The Verve of

Wigan, facing off against Sheffield’s Pulp. It pains me to say it but Pulp and

Jarvis Cocker are just too iconic, I firmly believe Common People could hold

its own as the new national anthem. The Verve are special, and Bitter Sweet

Symphony can take on any great song, but that slim specky guy in a suit is too

good to turn down.

Red Rose 4-4 White Rose

Final Score: Red Rose 4-4 White Rose

So after a decade-panning, genre-mashing, hotpot-making battle,

the two sides come out neck and neck, which I think is about right.

I guess it’s up to our Lancaster athletes to settle the score after all.

Anyways, at least the north can have comfort in the knowledge that

they’ll always have better music than those pesky southerners

(except Mike Skinner, love you, Mike).

This band originating, from Preston,

has lyrically catchy songs. One that

I find myself listening to on repeat is

their single “Like They Do.” The synthheavy

hook and catchy lyrics are both

elements that makes the band unique.

Their newest single “Northern Bones”

is grittier and contrasts ‘Like They

Do’ completely, with the bands talent

for lyricism thriving in this grittiness.

I recommend giving their recent

singles a listen as the band’s future

seems very promising!

Image Credit: Amelia Daniels, Caitlyn Taft via

Spotify

This Huddersfield band’s range is incredible.

Dabbling in post-punk to the blues, they are

truly something else. Their newest album

“Life’s a Bench, Then They Put Your Name

on It” explores so many different music

genres- with this record, they have found

their footing and they’re unleashing their

full potential. My personal favourites are

‘Better Door (Than a Window)’ and ‘Meet

Me at the Station’.



Luckily, that’s not the point of the show.

Ted Lasso is just a workplace comedy with

an out-of-place boss who wins everyone

over with his relentless positivity, and that

includes the audience. Somehow, his nice-

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SCREEN 15

S c r e e n

The Myth of Sisyphus:

SCREEN EDITOR:

James Wilson

Greg Florez

Ted Lasso is a Very Weird TV Show

A Hidden Lancastrian Gem

WRITER

Rarely do I watch short films,

even rarer is it I watch them,

or any film, on DVD. The

younger years as a closeted roman catholic

circumstances under which I found the

found a cheerful reminder of itself as the

James Wilson

guy approach even wins his team games of

DVD for The Myth of Sisyphus (2022) are

character Father Shepherd made out with

SCREEN EDITOR

football – enough to give him three series,

Jesus on the Cross.

and counting, in the hot seat.

even rarer. Walking home from work on

a Saturday, I found a rough-looking DVD

case with a catchy cover title.

What an odd thing Ted Lasso really is. For

anyone that doesn’t know about Apple TV’s

hit sitcom, let’s get it out the way.

Hyper-nice, hyper-American rootin-tootin

American Football coach Ted Lasso (Jason

Sudeikis) inexplicably becomes manager

of fictional team AFC Richmond, despite

knowing less than nothing about the sport.

It’s a conceptually ridiculous idea, and an

absolutely devastating watch if you’re a

football purist.

A realist depiction would

see Lasso’s team dissected

atom by atom on the pitch

and eviscerated in the

press, contributing to a

shorter-lived tenure than Liz

Truss’s Prime Ministership.

Ted Lasso has generally received

a lot of goodwill both critically and

publicly. Its first series set an Emmys

record for most-nominated new comedy

and its second won various accolades and

statuettes.

However, its third series has proved less

popular, and perhaps sums up the show’s

polar nature in one package. Episodes often

transition from Ted’s light-hearted Kansan

rambling to explorations of more serious

topics such as homophobia and racism in

football in a line of dialogue or single cut.

As an example of representation and

inclusivity, Ted Lasso surpasses every show

I have yet seen, covering a range of issues

including and beyond the two mentioned,

foregrounding a grand cast of characters

of diverse ethnicities, sexualities and

backgrounds. Its treatment of these issues

are sensitive and respectful.

Despite these laudable qualities, their

In between, the show has taken the time to

delve into its large ensemble of characters,

from WAG-turned-Girlboss Keeley Jones

(Juno Temple) to journalist Trent Crimm

(James Lance), previously a punchline, who

enjoys exponentially more screen time

as he is access-all-areas privileges after

becoming club’s designated journalist.

Like a kid in a candy store, Lasso perhaps

has too much choice. Some well-paced

character developments span the series,

but the third series has a tendency to

introduce and resolve personal

conflicts in the same

episode, even within a

matter of scenes.

With so many

issues arising and

disappearing, it

is hard to see a

backbone running

through the

episodes. Instead,

there is an excess of

minor issues that generate

little interest. You would think

the team’s fortunes would provide a clear

throughline, but the football often seems

like an excuse for other things to happen,

rather than the focus of the series. Instead,

the more trivial aspects of AFC Richmond’s

bizarre existence play out: puerile training

sessions and a team-bonding all-nighter

in Amsterdam keep trivial comedy at the

forefront of the show.

At its best, Ted Lasso weaves humour with

warm appeals to sentimentality, but there’s

a little less of that balance as the extended

runtimes of this series’ episodes – having

been boosted from 30 minutes in season

one to nearly an hour now – means there is

a lot more filler and more dud gags which,

given Lasso’s style of comedy, results in

many an odd, cringeworthy scene.

But Ted Lasso always has

an ace up its sleeve –

Ted Lasso. Just like his

team, the series can

be failing to perform,

but there’s something

so infectious about his

positivity that means you

can’t help but enjoy the

ride regardless.

I would imagine not everybody feels the

same, often his fellow characters become

frustrated by the relentless optimism of

his outlook. It’s a simple trick too, though

I’m not ashamed to say that it works like

a charm on me. The best TV dramas and

comedies are at a level of mastery in both

facets, and Ted Lasso is neither as dramatic

nor comedic as its contemporary shows,

but it is very happy to be there all the same.

Image Credit: AppleTV

I then proceeded to go back home and

watch and enjoyed it, though I was

confused, or maybe I got what it was

saying about desire, repression, or maybe

there’s not much to get; I can’t really

remember. But I knew I had to show it to

my friends. What was an odd discovery

on the stonewalled borders of Williamson

Park became an evening delight.

In the spirit of

celebrating all things

Lancaster,

The Myth of Sisyphus

(available on YouTube,

free of charge) is

Lancashire through and

through.

Shooting locations include Heysham’s St.

Peter’s Church, the green fields around

Lancaster’s Castle, and a local veggie

restaurant, The Whale Tail Café. The film

premiered at the Dukes’ short film festival,

LA1 Shorts.

Before my attempt to

provide a summary,

I should state that

watching the film is the

only way to understand it

fully.

The plot is important, but a summary is no

substitute for a viewing (seriously go and

watch it, it costs little time).

Plot-wise, we see the world through an

increasingly self-doubting priest whose

libidinal attachments to religion, the

church, and his own social position

erupt into visceral flashes of homosexual

eroticism. Now if that’s not your sort of

thing, I’ll add that the memory of my

Father Shepherd himself is played by

Dan Hodges, who delivers a performance

that works well enough to convince the

audience of the tortuous existentialist

themes this film explores. The scenes of the

more abstract and emotive kind are to some

extent confusing, but they add a degree

of excitement that helps carry the story

through.

Lewis Nancet, the cowriter

and co-director,

transforms the archetype

of the philosophical

interlocutor we see in

the works of Descartes,

Berkeley etc. into an

engaging and patient

character.

He and Dan Hodges, the film’s other

writer and director, craft a digestible

and entertaining short, so if you have 25

minutes to spare and are in the mood for

something Lancastrian, watch The Myth of

Sisyphus!

Image Credit: @tempo_productions

and @nancsett on Instagram

‘Wallace and Gromit’ and ‘Chicken Run’:

The History Behind Aardman

Animation’s Personal War of the Roses

Amy Brook

ARTS ASSOCIATE EDITOR

Whether you were born in the 1980s or the 2010s, adults and

students alike will be highly aware of the works of Aardman

Animation.

The award-winning, Bristol-based company was founded

by Peter Lord and David Sproxton and has been creating

stop-motion masterpieces since as early as 1972, starting

with small, animated segments for the BBC series Vision

On. Aardman later had a fantastic run with their series

Morph, but nothing would compare to the sensational pair of

characters making their on-screen debut in 1989.

Thanks to the work of Lancastrian Oscar-winning animator

and director, Nick Park, in Wallace and Gromit: A Grand Day

Out, Britain’s finest Claymation duo were introduced to the

public. “Gromit was a cat, Wallace had a moustache, and their

first adventure was meant to be like Star Wars – but with

cheese,” writes Kate Abbot for The Guardian.

The twenty-five minute long short

proved so popular that it gave way to

the following short productions of The

Wrong Trousers, A Close Shave and

A Matter of Loaf and Death, and even

its own full-length feature movie, The

Curse of the Ware-Rabbit.

Though placed as Yorkshire natives through voice actor Peter

Sallis’ applied accent, the duo are actually Yorkshire expats

living in Wigan, Lancashire. If Aardman chose to move away

from a Yorkshire setting within this particular series, that

was far from the case with another one of their bestselling

projects that came to be back in the early 2000s.

In 1996, Pathe decided to finance Aardman’s proposal for

their first feature film, Chicken Run, with Dreamworks getting

on board later in the decade.

The story was a genius

anthropomorphism of a simple

scenario: a group of chickens

living on a Post-World War Two

egg farm in Yorkshire decide

to devise a plan to escape the

clutches of the callous Mrs.

Tweedy.

From the moment they appear on screen,

Rocky, Ginger, Mac, Bunty, Babs and Fowler

make a fantastically memorable team.

Yorkshire dialects and individual personalities

perfectly illustrate how different members of a

team all play different parts when executing a

plan.

So, if Chicken Run and Wallace and

Gromit were to enter into their own

Roses competition, which one would

claim the prize?

Chicken Run accumulated a stunning $227 million at the

box office; The Curse of the Were-Rabbit $192 million – the

financial prize goes to the hens.

However, when considering Wallace

and Gromit’s overall global popularity,

there is a wider recognition of the duo’s

fame which beats the fame of Ginger’s

flock; they even have a themed ride at

Blackpool Pleasure Beach and

hugely successful eponymous

charity appeal for The Bristol

Children’s Hospital.

We can be certain that both Wallace and Gromit

will be influential figures in the stop motion

community, and our society, for many years to

come. (Even if Curse of the Wear-Rabbit gave me

nightmares.)

Image Credit: @wallaceandgromit

on Instagram

Lancashire Spirit on Screen:

Lexi Joyce

WRITER

The Netflix Original, Bank of Dave, released

earlier this year, is described as inspiring

and heartfelt, and it’s hard not to agree that

the Burnley-set drama is exactly that.

The plot follows self-made millionaire Dave

(Rory Kinnear), the financial heart of the

Burnley community, in creating loans for his

community.

This expands to his wholesome journey to

obtain a banking licence, which proves to

be a true struggle since the last approved

licence was granted 150 years prior, and the

political-economic division of the North and

South serves as a great obstacle for Dave

and his dedicated lawyer, Hugh (Joel Fry).

Though the film is

loosely based on true

events, the fictionalised

successes weren’t the

most joyful part – that

would be the support of

the Burnley community.

London lawyer Hugh is so enamoured by

the close-knit community that he considers

living there. The Burnley gang are tied

through a journey of family, death, love and

music. As well as the surprising inclusion of

a Def Leppard concert, the film even uses

warmer tones and uplifting karaoke scenes

to convey Burnley’s charm, sparking the

wholesome appeal of the story overall.

Similarly, the 2014 drama Northern Soul

is an emotional journey of two teens,

John (Elliot James Langridge) and Matt

(Josh Whitehouse). They are joined by the

struggles of 1970s school life, substance

addiction and family troubles, but they

become transformed by the soul music

scene.The film definitely explores darker

topics in its depiction of the ultimately

uplifting culture of the North-West music

scene.

The idea was

developed for 15 years

by screenwriter, Elaine

Constantine, inspired

by her love of American

soul.

The film is set around Lancashire,

predominantly filmed around Bury and

Bolton, and as a Bury girl myself, the

eccentric dancing and wide shots really

make me feel nostalgic for a time I never

experienced!

Anyone who uses

music and culture as

escapism or relief from

struggles can certainly

relate to John’s

character and his

rebellious lifestyle as a

student.

Though this film deals with tougher aspects

of life than Bank of Dave, the importance of

community is prevalent throughout both.

Available to watch on Box of Broadcasts,

‘Northern Soul’ uses music to bind the

community of the North-West to American

culture, creating an energetic exploration of

the highs and lows of early adult life.

So if you’re lacking in

Lancashire spirit, these

are the films to watch

for boosting pride

for the North-West,

a passionate hub of

music and culture.

Bank of Dave



16

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17

L i f e s t y l e

LIFESTYLE EDITORS:

Alexander Oswald

Harriet Shillito

How To Stay Fit and Healthy if

You Hate Sports

Maria Hill

ASSOCIATE EDITOR

Sport isn’t for everyone.

Sure, some options are less

competitive, or more friendly

towards the more introverted soul, but

at the end of the day, what’s the point

of joining a sports society if it’s not

a passion, and if you already have a

billion other things to do?

This isn’t me trying to discourage

you. Everyone should try and

step out of their comfort zone

(within limits). However, if

the idea of participating in

sports leaves you clammypalmed

and seeking the

quietest corner to do literally

anything else in, here are a

few ideas for how to stay fit and

healthy.

1. Healthy food

There’s this stereotype that students eat pot

noodles and plain pasta every day. As ‘Lancs

Yuk or Fuck’ has taught us, this isn’t always

an ungrounded accusation.

However, maybe it’s time to swap

your third McDonalds of the week

for something more nutritious.

It’s scientifically proven that a healthy diet

can increase the production of neurons

through ‘neurogenesis’, and what we eat

affects our synaptic placidity (a.k.a the

connections between our neurons growing

stronger or weaker).

2. Gentle exercise

According to Better Health,

walking for just 30 minutes

a day can decrease your

risk of developing heart

disease, cancer, diabetes, and

osteoporosis.

Lancaster has some trails that

look absolutely wonderful

this time of the year, so why no

go on a little wonder down the

woodland trail, or the canal?

Other gentle exercises

it would be beneficial

to pick up are cycling,

yoga, swimming, and

gardening.

3. Go easy on the alcohol

Drinking alcohol is a given at

University and, of course, there’s

nothing wrong with getting

bladdered every now and then.

However, consuming tons of

alcohol regularly increases

the likelihood of developing

a bunch of different health

problems: weakened immune

systems, and cancer, to name a

few.

Too much alcohol can also lead to

depression and anxiety, so maybe

next time on a night out, stop

drinking when you throw up.

4. Healthy brain,

healthy body

Putting down your

dissertation for a few

hours to indulge in a little

TLC becomes much more

appealing when finding out

that positive psychological wellbeing

can reduce the risks of heart

attacks and strokes. The internet

has endless lists of ways to help

you destress, such as making time

for your hobbies, meeting up with

friends, getting extra sleep, or trying

mindfulness.

4. Don’t let your

hobbies fall to the

wayside

Whether it is the new

Legends of Zelda game,

reading, or painting your

nails a different colour

every week, when things

get stressful, and you start

beating yourself up about

things- don’t loose what you love.

That may mean listening to your podcast

on the bus instead of in bed, or crocheting

whilst watching an online lecture, but by

continuing to do the things you love, you are

taking care of your mind, as well as growing

your skills!

If you’re suffering from mental

health problems, contact the NHS

or other forms of help such as

Samaritans on 116 123 or by email,

accessible on their website.

Image Credits: Maria Hill

The Best and Worst of Sports Diets/ Fads

Alexander Oswald

LIFESTYLE EDITOR

When it comes to exercise and sports,

everyone knows that the most important

part is keeping your body fuelled, but

sometimes what you see online isn’t all

that healthy.

Think of your body like a car, no matter how

well-tuned it might be – it can’t run without

petrol. But your diet doesn’t only fuel your

body, but also your brain.

There are so many different

diets out there, and while

one might work well for

someone, it might not work

for another.

So, it is important to listen to what

your body needs when deciding

that you want to change your

diet and be informed about

everything.

The typical calorie intake

needed to maintain

a baseline is 2,000 for

ciswoman and 2,500 for

cismen, but this varies

from person to person, so

it is important to understand

your own needs due to varying

metabolism, size, and exercise habits.

There are many calorie calculators on

the internet for this. Fruit, vegetables,

carbohydrates, protein and dairy, and fat are

all needed for a healthy diet, so limiting your

intake of one section won’t help.

One way to ensure you’re

eating healthy is to split

your plate into sections

– 50% fruit and veg, 25

% proteins /dairy/fat, and

25% carbohydrates. This Is

an easy way to make sure

your body is getting what

it needs without counting

calories or changing what

you eat.

Speaking as a member of the powerlifting

society, finding healthy

foods that you enjoy, not

cutting out ‘junk food’

completely, and meal

prepping so you have

a meal available when

you’re in a rush to avoid

skipping meals are all

important components

of a healthy diet.

When it comes

to different diets,

it is easy to get lost in the

different information that

is out there on the internet

with not every diet being

good for you.

From veganism to carnivore

diets and from 3 meals a

day to 6, everyone has

different preferences and

requirements so take the

time to understand what you

need first.

One popular diet is the

Mediterranean diet, which

is a variety of vegetarian and

pescatarian. The focus is on whole

vegetables and grains, fresh fruit and fatty

fish, red wine (perfect for the Uni student),

dairy, and nuts (an essential part of the

student lifestyle).

Not only does this diet

benefit from including all

major food groups, but

it also encourages no

limiting of calories and

centres around a balanced

diet. The inclusion of fatty

fish also helps with brain

function and will make you

feel better.

Another option might be intermittent fasting.

While you might be one of the students that

organises, their day waking up hours before

lectures to make a full English breakfast in

the morning, others are getting out of

bed, brushing their teeth, putting

on the first clean clothes they see

and hoping on the 1A to make it

to their 9am 10 minutes late.

If so, you might already be

intermittent fasting.

The idea is that you eat during

8 hours of the day, and fast for

16.

While this diet

can be beneficial

for some people, it can

also encourage binge

eating and not eating for

hours after exercise or

going to the gym will be

counterproductive.

The benefits of picking a diet that suits your

needs, and your body are huge, but it is so easy

to fall into old habits and lose focus. Remind

yourself that a diet is your choice and that off

days are okay. That Sultans after a night out

won’t ruin your progress in the gym.



18

L I F E S T Y L E

Exam Season: A Survival Game

Georgina England

WRITER

Feeling overwhelmed?

Stressed? Is the pressure

kicking in? At this time of year,

it’s common to feel like your

head’s going to explode. SCAN

spoke to students, to see how

they take care of their mental

wellbeing during the exam

season storm.

It’s that time of year again: with

Roses and exam season rolled

into the same term, the stress

is bound to hit. No matter how

many YouTube study vloggers

and TikTok ‘motivation’ videos

you watch, or how many friends

you whine to, it’s very easy to

feel alone with your stress.

SCAN interviewed Lancaster

students, to ask how they

deal with exam stress year

after year. The question was

often followed by a laugh, and

a blatant, “I don’t!”, and an

anecdote of their exam-season

low-points. But they survived

it – and sooner or later, the

coping mechanisms began to

flow. Here’s a short list of their

top tips, to stay sane while you

work.

Maintaining The

How to Stay Productive After Exams

Maisie Otterburn

WRITER

Exam season is always very

stressful and can very quickly

become chaos with revision and

work.

Staying busy during the exam

period is more of a given than

a possibility, as many of us will

be catching up on readings we

were supposed to do months

ago, re-reading old lecture notes

and trying to get through the

exams with minimal added

stress.

Once exams are over we might

find ourselves falling into a

more relaxed routine or perhaps

completely out of routine all

together. This is definitely a

good thing initially – we all

deserve a break!

However, it can

be very easy to

lose all sense of

motivation and

productivity once

exams come to a

close. As much as it

is important to relax,

it is also essential to

maintain productivity.

Otherwise, you

might find yourself

in a fortnight-long

slump.

Productivity, however,

is relative. One person’s

‘productive’ might simply be

getting out of bed and standing

outside for an hour, whilst

another person’s ‘productive’

means that every hour is full of

ruthlessly planned activities.

Both are valid and essential for

maintaining good mental

health after exams.

Whatever type

of person you

are hopefully

this article

will give you

some ideas on

how to make

your after

exam time

a bit more

productive.

Basics:

If you think about it, there are

three main things that every

human needs to keep going:

food, water, and sleep. Every

doctor will give you the same

advice: so, if you’re not looking

after these basic human needs,

how are you expecting to keep

functioning? Make the most

of the water fountains in the

library, batch-cook healthy,

freeze-able meals and set

yourself a revision curfew, to

ensure you wind down before

bed.

Take regular

breaks:

You may feel guilty about

walking away from your

revision, but actually, admitting

that our brains can only take so

much, can really help to relieve

the pressure. Stepping away will

calm you down and clear your

head. Something as big as a

night off with friends doing

something you love, or as

small as a shower and some

food, can make the biggest

difference to your wellbeing,

and how you feel when you

return to your work. And

remember – it isn’t a break if

you don’t relax while doing it!

If you

aren’t too

keen on

spending a lot of

money on activities,

then going on walks,

runs, hikes etc are

always a great thing

to do.

It gets you out of the house, you

can do it alone or with other

people and it’s totally free! You

can also make them as long or

Exercise:

Sometimes removing yourself

from the area you’re studying

in helps you mentally detach,

as well as physically. Exercise,

in whatever form you choose,

will expel that stressed and

anxious energy in a healthier,

endorphin-boosting way! You

could go to Williamson Park,

around the woodland trail or

Chapel Lane, outside Cartmel.

Background noise:

Get into the studying groove

that works for you. Some

people can only work in silence

– others need some background

chit-chat or beats to keep them

going. Many students say that

the music they put on affects

how

they

short as you want, it’s totally up

to you. It might be a good time

to find some new walking and

running routes if it’s something

you enjoy doing. Playing sports

is also a really good way to keep

productive, even if it’s just going

to the gym.

If walking and

running isn’t really

your thing then

why not

consider

cinema

or

theatre

trips,

shopping

days or

going to

watch your sports

team play?

Even just going to the

supermarket or running errands

is something productive that

you can do if you can’t really

be bothered doing much

else. Some times, keeping

the mundane tasks in our

lives consistent can mean the

difference between good and

bad mental health.

SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

approach the work

– so whether it’s to chill yourself

out with some light reading or

bashing out an essay to some

D&B, tailor your music to the

energy you want to feel!

Talk about it!

There are so many people

going through what you are.

Sometimes having a talk, a

scream, or even a cry with

your friends about coursework

deadlines or exam modules,

can be extremely cathartic, and

make you feel less alone. Plus,

academic tutors can help you

review any difficult material,

and the welfare team are always

on hand. Even the Lancaster

Nightline may offer some

helpful advice.

Exam season is a break-neck

time for all of us – the most

important thing you can do,

is remain sane! If you are

struggling, please contact:

Your college JCR Welfare

Officer

University Chaplaincy Centre,

or Welfare Team

Lancaster Nightline: nlvol@

lancaster.ac.uk

Samaritans: 0330 094 5717

Mind: 0300 123 3393

CALM: 0800 58 58 58

Text SHOUT to 85258

Big day outings like

visiting different

cities is always a

fabulous way to be

productive. There’s

thousands of things

for you to do in the

cities like museums,

shopping centres,

restaurants, pubs

and bars and so

much more!

Some cities do walking, talking

tours if that’s something you

are interested in. Even small

villages like Haworth (the home

of the Bronte sisters) are nice

places to visit and spend the day

if you weren’t wanting to go to a

big, busy city.

Of course, it is totally fine and

expected that you enjoy some

relaxing days at home where

you don’t do much, but it is also

important to have some more

productive days as well. It will

benefit your mental health and

most importantly, it’ll keep you

distracted from the existential

dread of incoming exam results.

Image Credits: Georgina England, Ami

Clement and Harriet Shillito

Which Ice-Cream

Flavour are you

in a Lancs

Summer?

Harriet Shillito

LIFESTYLE EDITOR

Summer has arrived, and the campus icecream

bars are in full swing! Find out which

ice-cream flavour is a bit of you – Lancaster

style.

Vanilla

You can always be relied upon to get that

workload organised! Pastel highlighters a-gogo,

your beautiful filing systems and colorcoded

notes are worthy of any bedroom

wall. You break up revision with little 3pm

Costa dates, maybe lunch out at Gallico on a

Saturday, if you can tear yourself away from

the grind!

Strawberry

The busy bee: no-one understands how

you function. You hit the gym at dawn,

then power-walk to the library and work

relentlessly, yet your social battery is still

high enough for a night with the flatmates

in Spoons. Once exams are over, the socials

will only get better – birthday bashes in Vibe,

concerts in Manchester, and maybe even a

visit to friends at another uni too!

Chocolate

No amount of deadlines can stress you out.

What’s the point in worrying when you

know it’ll get done eventually? Speakers on

in Alex Square, frisbee on the lawns – revise

at antisocial hours, when the party’s over.

Lunch is always a Greggs. You play a risky

game with deadlines – cut them to the last

moment, but you don’t let the pressure kill

your vibe.

Salted Caramel

The procrastinating, stressy, get to the library

at lunchtime gang! When people ask “how’s

work going?” you are the yo-yo – sometimes

stressed as hell, refusing to even have a

break in Alex Square, and sometimes you’ll

spend hours chatting to a friend on A floor,

sipping a JuiCafe milkshake. Extension? Help

yourself. You’ll get wasted one night, and cry

about your lack of work achieved the next

morning.

Mango Sorbet

You take a relaxed approach to revision:

perhaps in The Herbarium, or the Whale Tail,

cross-legged and listening to nature sounds!

Each day is broken up with a homemade

salad – lots of hummus – and a stroll along

the canal to reconnect with the natural

world. For you, exams will be whatever the

world decides – if you flunk it, it’s purely a

sign that you should book a one-way ticket

to Thailand and spend your days working in

elephant conservation.

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

19

Creative Writing

CREATIVE WRITING TEAM:

Amelia Daniels

& Sky Fong

Roses CreativeWriting

Competition: ‘Battle’

Shields

The petals of this flower will be shield shaped –

Scratched from battling in mud-rough fields

with muscles aching and veins chewing

blood to brain or blood in mouth.

This is fighting. We are partaking in the painting

of petals – These wars are an ongoing change

of the blossom and its rival shades –

Together, we wait to count each petal

as they unclip themselves to bloom – together, we wait

with the tension of an arrow – pulled back to a bitten lip –

We see them returning, with blood on their shields –

But then, we notice the colour of it.

The sky was purple when I saw you looking up at the

hidden stars.

Your topaz eyes wandered, searching for some spiral

of hope

In a turmoil of lavender haze.

The moon was nowhere to be seen,

taking a break from destruction and pain.

Your cheeks were damp from the drizzle,

A beautiful constellation in your skin.

‘Fe Gudinde’, you said to the sky,

‘I’m ready for my mission’.

Translucent turquoise wings were like diamonds in

your back,

elegantly shimmering in the darkness.

You disappeared, eaten by beauty,

And I kept staring at the lavender haze

wondering if you ever knew I was here.

Valentina Caneschi

Lucy Prescott

RUNNERS-UP

Lavender Haze

A Letter

POETRY WINNER

To love is to indulge and to indulge is to ignore.

My darling, send your heart to me if you’re willing to not

destroy me.

These streams travelling down these hills of flesh become

torrents at war with my atoms,

Praying for them to change: to break me down and build me

up for our embrace to be free.

Oh, how could you be so selfish as to walk the ground

before my eyes?!

And make me drawn to you? Away from my own life?

Pulling me into this hidden place,

Where our scarred beauty lies to keep itself safe.

If only you could tell your bio-raiser that your beating organ

can’t bear you their children.

If only we could fly through these waves, or soar above them

like our letter,

Tied up in the envelope we send between each other.

Our tongues grace the seal, so we can feel the remnants of

our mouths

Just aching for union, ‘cause it’d be careless to dive into the

ocean between us

And drown for the sake of a touch.

Adam Lawrence

Comments from the

Editor

Sky Fong

CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR

This should be the definitive poem about

Roses. ‘Shields’ contains vivid imagery

that frames the petals of a rose as shields.

Lucy creates devastation by putting such

beauty against a bloody battle. The poem is

tightly structured in three quatrains with

an ingenious use of dashes, The plosive

consanace in the second stanza makes

it feel like you are chewing the words as

you read them. It pulls you into the poem,

makes you part of the ordeal. Shields is

definitely a deserving winner of this

battle of words.

Our Arts Associate Editor

Amy Brook has taken the

time to illustrate the works

of both our poetry and

prose winners.

Comments from the

Editor

Sky Fong

CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR

‘Lavender Haze’ is a Taylor Swiftinspired

poem that coats a sense of

longing in colourful imagery. With

the detail of the ‘you’ partnered with

natural imagery, we can read this

poem of one of pure emotion. The

beauty of the purple contrasts with

the subtle hints of danger, making

this an intriguingly cryptic poem.

‘A Letter’ examines the link between

the two dear lovers that are

separated due to the brutality of war,

illustrated with haunting images of

“hills of flesh”. The central alligned

structure creates a beautiful shape

for the reader to analyse til their

hearts content. The questions and “If

only”s are especially devastating and

tug at my heartstrings.



20 CREATIVE WRITING

SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

21

The Deceiver

Watch your backs,” our It’s just a pigeon. A stupid pigeon.

eliminating the

commanding officer “Stay frosty,” Mettle, the team leader, machine that dropped Lars. He yelled

grunted at us moments instructed and continued moving something inaudible while he sprayed a

before we entered the forwards through the

round of bullets at the

abandoned train station. I cursed scattered debris.

train, slicing through the hologram and

inwardly. It wouldn’t be enough to watch

our backs; the attack would come from

every possible angle.

Fear curled around my heart as I

followed two other soldiers into the

gaping mouth of the station. Two more

soldiers followed. We were the third

Behind me, Fredricks was muttering

a prayer, while Lars ran through every

swear word in a

repeating order. A bead of sweat crawled

down my temple. My breath rattled

around my chest with

every inhale.

taking out the machines creating the

illusion. They slid to our

feet, cylinders of junk metal we’d recover

for our own purposes.

Mettle shouted a formation, one I

barely registered yet complied with,

nonetheless. Facing outwards

squadron to be sent in; the base faced “Something’s off,” Hill whispered in a circle, we backed away from Lars’

radio silence

moments after the others entered.

“Strike Team 3, your position —” The

comms cut off in a sharp crackle,

sending an electric hum

to Mettle, the five of us still slowly

advancing. “We’ve made it

further than the others and we’re still

alive. Something’s wrong.”

Mettle flicked on a flashlight and swung

body, further into the station. Our

number had dropped to

four, dwindling our chances of us all

making it out of there alive. I prayed that

the spear-wielding machine was the

whining through my ear. Then, dead its illuminating beam around the only one of its kind in the station. As the

silence.

Devoid of life, the train station floor was

littered with rubble and the bodies of

station. Eerie shadows

were thrown up against the walls, but

there was no sign of the enemy.

seconds ticked by, I reckoned that it was,

as no one else had died yet.

“My 12 o’clock!” I shouted as I saw figures

our fallen. None of us

“Mettle to Adrian.” Mettle tried to moving towards the station’s opening,

checked for the life we knew was already contact our base of operations, just a through which we

extinguished. All of us knew what few hundred metres from

had entered. Another squadron was

we were walking into; most of us had

seen the Fallouts live on TV a mere 18

months ago. And there we were, fighting

for mankind’s survival.

our current location. “Come in, Adrian.”

Radio silence. It was impossible to tell

whether it was a problem on their end,

or ours.

approaching, stepping over the bodies

the same way we had done.

“Hold your fire,” Mettle shouted, the four

of us facing the new squadron.

The enemy was designed to Then Lars saw it first.

It was far too soon for a fourth squadron

outmanoeuvre us — weak humans

against the unvanquishable force of

AI. All it took was some idiot to ask a

computer how it’d improve life on Earth

and bam, the best

solution is to wipe out the humans. The

machines went rogue, taking on lives of

their own with the

goal to obliterate their creators.

It was manageable for a handful of

months before a couple of bots hacked

into the government’s

defence system and stumbled across

some serious next-gen war tech. They

got it up and running in

no time, bringing a concept out of its

development stage and progressing it

all the way to reality.

A noise above caught our attention, the

five of us training our guns to the ceiling

— all too triggerhappy.

“Incoming — 9 o’clock!”

On our left, a train had materialised from

the forgotten tracks and was ploughing

towards us. Harsh

steel scraping against cracked ceramic

tiles, the sound horrendous, but leaving

no marks behind. I

frowned, gripped my gun tighter. Lars

was right; something’s off.

“Hold your ground!” Mettle spat at us at

the same time I realised what was going

on. “It’s a

hologram!”

I steadied my nerve, gritting my teeth as

I braced. Lars swore at Mettle angrily,

dropped and rolled out of the train’s

path before he could respond. As she

got to her feet, a short spear pierced all

the way through her armour with a swift

thunk. She crumpled to the floor, lifeless.

Mettle snapped into action and followed

the spear’s trajectory, taking aim and

to be sent in; we’d hardly been in there

for five minutes. I

studied their walks, their actions. Then

I heard one of them praying, and

another one swearing.

“Mettle, it’s a hologram of us,” I told

him, unnerved by the accuracy of the

holograms’ replicas.

“Fire,” a single word, and the four of us

emptied our 50-round mags, firing at

holograms of

ourselves.

The smoking and battered cylinders

clattered to the floor and rolled until

stopped by dead bodies,

the sound ringing through the hollow

station.

“Surely they’re out of holo-bots

now?” Fredricks questioned, his tone

incredulous.

The clanging of metal steps behind us

answered his question, and we quickly

swivelled to face a

small army of robots. Around twenty

bots, armed with impossible intellect

and, of course, guns.

“Four against twenty hardly seems fair,”

I scoffed.

“Fredricks is right. The holo-bots are

down, this is just your bog-standard

shoot-out now,” Mettle

answered, his eyes never leaving the

enemy as he reloaded his gun. The rest

of us followed suit.

Behind us, there was a whirring and

grating sound of flesh contorted with

metal. We froze to see

Lars getting up, her corpse standing

once again. She took up her gun and

aimed it at her own

squadron, at us.

“No hard feelings.” She shrugged, cold

and mercilessly as she opened fire.

The Cost of Living Hub is here to try and help

ease the pressures of the cost of living crisis.

Highlighting free food events and resources, take

a look below to see upcoming projects from your

Students' Union, your college and the University.

Comments from the Editor

Amelia Daniels

CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR

Hannah has applied to every competition we have run, so it was about time she

won, and what a great piece to win with. The Deceiver highlights the very real fear

that artificial intelligence is going to realise how damaging the human race truly is

and in this story, they to take matters into their own hypothetical hands. Hannah

has perfectly encapsulated the theme of battle, mirroring the reilience of our sports

teams and societies as they battled York on the pitches, courts and track to prove that

roses really are red.

Image Credits: Amy Brook

PROSE WINNER

Hannah

by

Cochrane

your.lancastersu.co.uk/col



22

R o s e s

SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

SPORTS EDITORS

Josh Perrett

& Tom Jeffreys

ROSES ARE RED: Lancaster Defy Odds to

Win Away Roses

Tom Jeffreys

SPORT EDITOR

Lancaster University’s athletes have defied

all odds to produce Lancaster’s first Roses

victory away from home in 38 years.

SCAN is immensely proud to report that

after 11 days of competition, countless days

of training, and immeasurable effort from

over 3000 athletes, organisers, media, and

more, Lancaster has won Roses 2023!!

The result was finally confirmed on Sunday

afternoon after Lancaster whistled past the

163.5-point threshold.

Finishing on a grand total

of 200 points to York’s

126, it’s an open and shut

case: Roses are red.

This also means that, for the first time since

2007, the two universities draw level on

Roses victories. This takes each university’s

Roses win tally to 28 apiece, with one draw

since the competition’s inception in 1965.

people

t h e

event

reached

out to.

A truly historic weekend for those in red, but

for the roses competition as a whole, with

the largest varsity competition in Europe

helping raise money for the competition’s

charity, ‘Survive.’ A charity choice inspired

by YUSU VP Sport Franki Riley, the whole

event acted as a campaign to ‘Shine a Light’

on sexual violence in sport, and the amount

raised is a huge testament to how many

FRIDAY

Lancaster

Blow

York

Out

The

Water

Tom Jeffreys

SPORT EDITOR

Lancaster’s fearsome Men’s Waterpolo

team overcame a resurgent York, whilst the

firm underdog women’s team pushed their

opponents all the way.

Men’s Waterpolo

Lancaster Men’s Waterpolo team travelled

to York with a high sense of expectation.

Indeed, as captain Rodrigo Calixto

explained, despite

Our VP Sport, Megan Homburg, was also at

the epicentre of the festival’s organisation. A

competitor herself in the Netball 1st team,

she knows firsthand what the tournament

means to Lancaster students:

“Roses, for many, is the absolute highlight

of student life at Lancaster University. The

meaning of it differs, however, depending

on whom you ask, be it staff, students, or

alumni. Each of these groups will agree on

one thing: that roses are definitely red.

“As VP of Sport I could not be prouder of the

athletes, staff, volunteers, student media,

and spectators”, continues Homburg.

“I truly could not be more

proud to be Lancaster.”

Indeed, the reason it matters so much to

so many is the amount of work that goes

into preparing for it. Homburg’s team has

been waist-deep in organisation since

the first term. Most, if not all sports clubs

were back in Lancaster over Easter in their

‘boot camp’ training programmes to prime

themselves for their games having had eyes

on this weekend throughout their BUCs

season.

Some societies, such as Rugby or Swimming,

were training for up to four weeks

“a very tough season,

this game was THE

game for us; everyone

always had eyes on Roses”

So, the stage was set.

Winning the swim off,

Lancaster took an

immediate lead.

Unperturbed by

a York quick

fire double,

Lancaster

headed into

what turned

out to be the

most crucial

quarter of the

match 4-2 up.

Attacking into

the shallow end,

Lancaster provided

a clinic in scoring

in the bigger goal, as

well as a masterclass in

defending in the deep end. Talisman

Alex Graves’ three goals of seven in the

match helped Lancaster secure an 8-3 lead

at halftime.

The shallow end advantage was clearly

the focus of the halftime team talks, and

York came out all guns blazing, with four

goals taking the score to 9-7 to Lancaster.

Understanding the peril of conceding more

momentum, Lancaster fired back with three

goals of their own, before York returned the

favour.

w i t h

drinking bans and daily sessions to create a

professional sporting environment, such as

the importance of Roses to them.

“All athletes and teams

have worked incredibly

hard this year and this

hard work can be seen

through the success of

Roses”

says Homburg, who helped organise the

transport of over 3000 supporters over to

York. “The atmosphere that was created in

York by Lancaster students was incredible

and set the tone for the entire

weekend”.

All of this effort

culminated in an

unforgettable,

recordbreaking

e v e n t

that has

c o r r e c t e d

years of

misfortune

a g a i n s t

Lancaster’s

age-old

rivals. The

significance

An erratic quarter with 11 goals scored,

and more prevented through some athletic

goalkeeping from Matt Johnston. It was all

to play for heading into the final quarter.

Signalling the sway of momentum, York

won the swim off, but Lancaster settled

some nerves through an important goal

from Giorgos Anastasi.

As a result, despite a valiant effort from York,

the score finished 16-11 to Lancaster! ‘It all

still feels unreal’, reflected Calixto, who is

already looking forward to next year’s event:

“we will smash York for the

seventh year in a row!”

Y 16 - 11 L

Women’s Waterpolo

Heading into the biggest game of their

season without a BUCS season, and

staggeringly only two players with prior

waterpolo experience, Lancaster were

swimming against the current. Their

handicap, though, was water under the

bridge and Lancaster were the quicker

team out of the blocks, with their captain

Nyxon Rockliffe-Fiddler drawing first blood

despite the disadvantage of shooting at a

smaller goal.

A York fightback ensued, with the homeside

of it is not lost on Homburg, nor was it lost

on the multitude of athletes who poured

blood, sweat, and tears into the event: “To

all involved this win is invaluable. This

wasn’t just for us, it was for the last 38 years

of Lancaster”.

So, to hear about how this year’s

cohort of Lancaster’s finest achieved

the impossible, have a read of this

special, award-winning SCAN issue,

where we detail everything you

need to know about the weekend’s

heroics. Enjoy!

scoring four unanswered goals. Refusing to

let their heads go down, improved discipline

and goals from Rockliffe-Fiddler and Callie

Scott steadied the ship, making it 4-3 going

into the second quarter.

At this point, the match became a tense

affair, with either side limited to one goal

apiece across the eight minutes. It was this

pressured environment that clearly brought

the best out of Lancaster goalkeeper and

indisputable WOTM India Stephenson,

who provided some jaw-dropping saves and

described that she ‘loved competing and

the tension was exhilarating”.

With the scores finely poised at 5-4 to

York at halftime, the cagey nature of the

game persisted. Despite Rcokcliffe-Fiddler

equalising, York were able to enforce

numerous shot-clock stoppages, and

despite some more wondrous goalkeeping,

finished the half 6-5 up.

With the crucial shallow end advantage,

York were favourites heading into the the

deciding quarter. Decisively, York took the

score to 8-5, forcing Lancaster to throw

bodies forward. With a vulnerable defence,

York sealed the deal at 9-7, an unfair

reflection of a tough season and spirited

performance from Lancaster.

Y 9 - 7 L

Image Credits: Ami Clement, @luswp

All Puzzles By Dan Power

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

23

Glitter and Flips: Lancs

come out at the Top of

the Pyramid

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

With a packed room well before

the start of the event, the

Lancaster Cheer squad, The

Roses, took to the matts in front

of a panel of judges. Whilst

they came out on top, their win

wasn’t without difficulty.​

The start of the

competition was

delayed due

to one judge

being late,

and another

having to

cancel an

hour prior

due to a

positive

covid test.

After a clear

display of

sportsmanship

from York and

Lancaster, both

teams were kept in the

loop, and tried to calm their

nerves as they waited longer and

longer.

York opened up the competition

with some non-competitive

performances, before moving on

to their poms routine. The York

Hornets had a roaring crowd to

support them, but still waves

of red facepaint and cardboard

signs could be seen from proud

lancaster supporters.

Next up, Lancaster’s poms

routine. With York doing there’s

on the solid floor, team captain,

Jess Norris, had to argue to get

matts put down as she wasn’t

comfortable with her team

performing their rehearsed

routine without it. They had

been practicing on matts the

entire lead up to roses, and

after another delay, york and

Lancaster competitors rolled

out the matts.

Finally, the Roses could begin,

and it soon became clear why

Norris was insistent on the matts.

With jaw-dropping aerials, flips,

and cartwheels, Lancaster had

significantly more air time that

York’s routine.

However following the

routine, one competitor

came to Norris and said

due to the matts not

being properly secured

with appropriate tape,

her shoe came off and

she had to hold on to it

for dear life to finish the

routine without it flying

away.

Jess Norris then came straight to

the SU staff, including VP Sport

Megan Homburg, expressing her

concern, who declined to give

comment on this event.

After a conversation of safety

with the SU, and her team, Norris

completed a ‘Playing under

Protest’ form, which is handed

to the judges and details their

issues with the running

of the competition.

It was signed by

York’s Cheer

Captain in

good faith,

and the two

captains

spent time

during

performances

discussing the

potential hazards

of this competition.

When asked if Lancaster

wants to continue, Norris

told us ‘The girls will

want to do it regardless’

so the show went on,

despite the judges

agreeing it isn’t normal

for the matts to be

untaped, as it doesn’t

constitute ‘suitable

matting’

as

outlined.

It then come to light that

the University of York only

have one piece of matt

tape, and the few that

were secured, were done

so by borrowing tape from

York St John, York’s second

non-competing university.

It was also then detailed that

the York team didn’t

know where

they would be

competing until

thirty minutes

before the

competition

was due

to start, likely

another reason for

a delay.

We carry on with

more fantastic

routines from both

teams in spite of the

incessant distraction,

with glitter on and

hair bows securely

in place. The squads

increased in

difficulty, in

both teams and duos until

the most advanced routines

competed at the end. However,

spectators at the event will

have noticed the opposing

competitors, and noncompeting

team members

holding the matts together with

their feet while teams were

competing, to try and make up

for the lack of securing tape.

With stunning aerials, perfect

synchronicity, and pop icon

remixes, Lancaster continued to

put on a fantastic show for the

packed sports hall, with people

standing far at the back, and

sat on the floor as far forwards

as we could get. York slipped

up a few times with falls and

wobbly lifts (don’t worry no one

got hurt!) and even to someone

who has never watched live

cheer competitions, Lancaster’s

routines appear much tighter,

and more complex.

During one lift, after jumping

down, a Lancaster

cheerleader

s e e m e d

to quickly

veer to the

left in mid-air,

leaving the crowd

with a brief gasp of

anxiety, before she was

caught perfectly by her

teammates. On the topic of

anxiety, York’s slips and falls

had me mortified. As such a

difficult sport, I couldn’t even

begin to imagine how these

lot do it.

With only

one slip

overall from

Lancaster,

I asked

Norris about it,

and she told us

‘that girl stepped

in last minute for

us, maybe three

days ago after

someone else got

injured, so she

has done really

well.’

I believe that speaks

volumes for the sportsmanship

and comradery of this sport: last

minute stand-ins, mature safety

discussions between teams, and

a roaring crowd for each and

every routine, regardless of if

they were Roses or Hornets.

I believe it important to

recognise the hardships of this

competition, with a hand full

of issues that could have been

avoided, which caused great

deals of stress not only to the

competitors, but to the audience,

as things were delayed and a lot

of whispers could be heard.

The presence of Hannah and

Megan of Lancaster Students

Union helped ease some of the

stress for Norris in the end,

but with no York staff present

at the event, both teams, as

well as LUSU, appeared even

more concerned. In spite of

the issues, both teams handled

the issues with outstanding

professionalism and maturity.

With the results to come at long

last, two circles were formed on

the matts. Red and White, and a

lot of hair bows.

York achieved one

victory across the

five categories, and

Lancaster stormed

ahead with four wins

out of five, adding an

early four points to our

scoreboard on Friday

afternoon.

But, it wasn’t straight to the pub

for these lot. Many of them either

stayed to cheer on our opening

ceremony Lacrosse players, or

got a coach back to Lancaster for

an early night, before travelling

back up to cheer on LUDans at

Saturday nights event.

Y 1 - 5 L

Lancs Snow

Slide to Victory

on the Slopes

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

One of our off-campus events over

the Roses weekend was of course

Snowsports, and for all of those

who couldn’t make it to Pendle Ski

Slope, we have it all here.

With a day full of skiing, the team

had an hour trip to Clitheroe, luckily

during one of the sunnier days of

Roses, starting midday Friday. As one

of the more active sports clubs at the

uni, they were fully prepared for the

event: ‘Lancaster Snow prepares all

year round for our competitions with

frequent training and multiple league

races throughout the year. Our race

team gets plenty of competition prep.’

And it certainly showed!

Despite being 90 miles away from

the main action in York, the ski

squad didn’t feel excluded at all.

They generally like to bring their own

spectators – friends, family, partners

– and YuSnow (York University

Snowsports) also do the same,

‘generating plenty of atmosphere’ to

make up for the off-campus setting,

however, I think they would struggle

to ski across the lake at York Campus.

To explain the semantics of Roses, I

thought it best to let President Will

Austin describe it: ‘Roses is broken

down into 2 events this year. An

individual race in which the fastest

skier from top to bottom is crowned

the winner. Then there is the team

event which is a best of 3, 5-man relay

event where the first team to all cross

the finish line wins’

Seems simple enough! The Ski Slalom

was worth one point, and was won

by Will of Lancaster. This was then

followed by the main four-point event,

the Open Ski, which, in the President’s

own words,

‘Lancaster crushed with

a 2-0 victory’!

As well as Roses success, the team

have been busy all year round,

claiming podium places left, right,

and centre.

‘Team has done amazingly this year.

At BUCs our race captain won 3rd

in GS. The team scored 5th place in

our Kings league which qualified

us for finals which was paired with

roses. While at finals, Will won the

individual competition and the team

got through to the Semi-finals.’

The team also found time between all

this competing to go on their annual

trip in January to Tignes, for six days

on the slopes. Despite the trip not

being all that snowsports is about, it

is certainly worth mentioning as an

accolade of organisation on behalf of

the exec!

Y 0 - 2 L



24 R O S E S SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

R O S E S 25

Lancaster Swim Team

float to a Roses victory

Tom Jeffreys & Efé Imoyin-Omene

SPORT EDITOR

WRITER

Lancaster’s men’s and women’s swimming

teams were triumphant on a momentous

Saturday morning.

Having travelled to the British University

Swim League National A-Finals and

finishing second just a few weeks prior,

confidence was justifiably high. Looking to

manifest this, the freestylers opened up the

competition:

Causing an early upset, York won the

Women’s 100M freestyle, before Lancaster’s

Dylan Fairclough won the men’s

corresponding category with an impressive

time of 52.69 seconds.

Fairclough and winning became

synonymous across the event. The freestyle

specialist competed in five events and

won all of them. Speaking to SCAN after,

Fairclough’s commitment to the team was

evident:

“Everybody at LUSWP

worked extremely hard for

our win, especially during

bootcamp. It means a lot to

me to have the opportunity

to contribute to such a

successful club and I’m

confident that next year

the win will be even more

dominant”

A bold prediction by Fairclough, but with

good reason. The men’s team bounced off

his success with another win in the 100m

breaststroke. The women, however, gave

themselves a mountain to climb with

another loss.

For the Women’s 100M Butterfly, York

University notched yet another win for

their side. Dramatically, though, the

Lancaster men pulled through in the very

last second to secure another victory with

only a seventh of a second between them

and the next competitor.

Fine margins like this is testament to the

extra mile LUSWP went to prepare for

their event, as explained by men’s captain

Jack Ivison: “to us, roses is undoubtedly

the biggest competition of the year and the

one we put the most time and effort into

preparing for. It was quite special to top

off such an outstanding year of swimming

in the club with a roses red wash and this

result”.

For the Women’s 50M Breaststroke,

the swimmers swarmed back in with a

vengeance. The A team’s Katherine Daynes

came 1st with a whopping time of 34.89

seconds and the B’s Ellen Georgeson wasn’t

too far behind, making her way to second

place with a timing of 36.60 seconds. A

classic Lancaster 1-2.

The Men’s 50M Breaststroke followed

their counterparts lead by getting another

Lancaster 1-2 through Andrej Drzaic and

Rafael Eleftheriou.

The 50M Butterfly represented another

point of strength for Lancaster. York won

both the men’s and women’s categories,

but Lancaster secured 2nd and 3rd in both.

Even though Lancaster wasn’t winning all

Red Wash for Underwater Hockey:

The Coolest Sport You’ve Never Heard Of

Beth Train- Brown

WRITER

Lancaster’s men’s and women’s swimming

teams were triumphant on a momentous

Saturday morning.

Underwater Hockey (aka Octopush, aka

UWH) is one of the more niche Roses sports.

Played with pucks and sticks, snorkels and

fins, this competition is a game of hockey…

underwater.

First Half

To kick off the match, six from Lancaster’s

team of ten strain against the wall waiting

for the call. ‘Ready, set, go!’ And they’re off,

sprinting through the water. They meet

York’s six in the middle where the puck sits

at the bottom.

Within moments, 2019 GB player Ella

Tomlinson scores the first Lancaster goal.

In each six: two or three forwards drive the

puck toward the other team’s goal, a centre

supports the two halves, and two or three

backs defend their own goal.

For Lancaster, two forward attackers prove

time and time again they know how to work

together. Joe Cann, a 3rd-year and 2nd-year

Sam Shutler are a force to be reckoned with.

Both have been training together for the

last two years and they’re unbeatable for

York’s defence. Captained by Peter Sr. and

presented by Peter Jr., Lancaster

dominate through the first

half.

Until Shutler and

Cann charge

ahead to meet

the first real

fight from York.

A struggle

breaks out feet

from York’s

goal. Unlike

land hockey,

a struggle in

UWH could

spell defeat for

anyone when

players can only

hold their breath for

so long.

At the last moment, it’s centreback

Jim Cousins (pictured, right) who

secures the goal.

Interval: The Lancaster

Stingrays

Lancaster’s team, The Stingrays, are

mascotted by Steve the crocheted Stingray

(courtesy of Dee Dunkinson, society

treasurer). While many of the Roses team

have competed before, most of the

society members join with no

previous experience.

SCAN spoke to Peter

Lamont (pictured,

left) , president of

the society and top

goal-scorer for

the match about

how he joined The

Stingrays:

‘After seeing the

team’s flag at

Refreshers Fair in

first year, I thought

it sounded cool and

turned up to a taster.

Four years later, and

I’ve competed in Students

Nationals at Leeds, Nautilus at

Sheffield, the Celtic Cup in Wales, and the

Shamrock Cup in Ireland.

‘To anyone considering joining, you won’t

regret it. It’s a small, close-knit team of

of these events, getting 2nd and 3rd place

consistently helped us secure a lot of points.

This undoubtedly

contributed to Lancaster

winning in the end, and was

perhaps the result of a ‘sea

of red poolside’, with the

away support egging on

their swimmers even when

races seemed like lost

causes.

The fastest races set the event ablaze with

the Women’s 50M freestyle first. Another

Lancaster double podium secured some

important points, before Lancaster secured

another glorious 1-2. Heading into the final

stages of the event, Lancaster’s extensive

support began enjoying a party atmosphere

as the scores became unassailable for York.

Eventually, the final scores were announced:

a comprehensive 75-45 win for the men,

and an assured 63-57 win to the women.

Y 45-75 L

Y 57-63 L

Image Credits: @LUSWP via Instagram

good friends who are so supportive and

fun to play with. There’s nothing like

underwater hockey.’

Second Half

In the second half of the match, that

close-knit teamwork pays off. York

abandons thoughts of attack and clings

desperately to a defence led by York’s no.12.

But they’re doomed to fail against The

Stingrays’ ruthless skill.

The game finishes poetically with a final

goal from the 19-year-old centre who scored

the first goal, Ella Tomlinson.

After a team vote, MVP for the match is

the youngest player, Joel Anderson. A firstyear

Computer Science student, Anderson’s

experience outside of university sports

is ‘watching Octonauts.’ Chosen for his

constant drive of the game, always trying

to make something happen, Anderson is

invaluable to the team.

Despite underwater hockey losing pointscoring

status in this year’s Roses, the

sweeping Lancaster win stands them in

good stead for next year.

Y 0 - 21 L

Image Credits: Elizabeth Train-Brown

SATURDAY

Lancaster Serves Total

Dominance in

Table Tennis

Sky Fong

CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR

Lancaster’s Table Tennis Club were one

of many clubs up at the break of dawn on

the Saturday morning of Roses as both

their A and B teams took on York under the

watchful eye of the Main Hall crowd and a

YouTube livestream.

Lancaster’s Percy Chan stepped up first with

two exciting matches; the first arguably the

most thrilling of the day. Taking on York’s

Max Generowicz, Chan started by two

winning games. However, Generowicz hit

back with a very close third game, winning

11-9. Generowicz continued his momentum

and equalled the match 2-2 with a swift 11-3

victory.

The last game was neck-and-neck with the

two players going into deuce until Percy

overshot and lost 15-13.

Despite this loss,

Percy came back with

a vengeance in his

match against York’s

B team captain, Alan

Brown, ending with a

comprehensive

3-0 victory.

The A team continued in

Chan’s vein, dominating York with several

3-0 victories, courtesy of Scott Barker, Yudai

Yamase, and Wesley Burrough.

Barker’s 3-0 victory, however, definitely

didn’t reflect the intensity of the match.

York’s Sam Nicholson had anti-spin on one

side of his paddle, which Lancaster’s Scott

had to adapt to quickly, but he was able to

spin it to win it, edging through games with

scores of 11-7 and 11-9, before securing the

victory with an 11-5 third game.

An intense all-female match between the

Lancaster B team’s co-captain Adi Dhillon

and York’s Harshita Janjani was entertaining

start to the second half as the noise level in

the main hall thickened. Each player won a

game before Janjani bested Dhillon in some

impressive rallies going far away from the

table.

Dhillon regained her confidence winning

11-7 for the fourth game, tying the match

points. She opened the fifth game with a

four-point lead and never looked back,

securing her 3-2 match victory.

Lancaster A team’s female

player Janice Yeung

also had some intense

matches. Her

match against Olly Newton

started with a close game

that went to deuce, and

Yeung capitalised on her

strong forehands, winning

13-11.

The two went to a decisive fifth game which

started with Yeung being in the lead 5-3

before the players switched sides on the

table. The switch benefitted Olly, who turned

it around and won 3-2.

Janice then went against Rafael Duarte,

and secured the match 3-2 with a close fifth

game which she won 11-9.

Lancaster’s Yamase’s

loud, serving stomps

had not only shaken the

camera many a time, but

they also shook York’s A

team captain Nicholson’s

confidence.

Despite Yudai losing the first game, he

regained momentum, winning three games

in a row and the match.

The Lancastrians furthered their dominance

in the two doubles matches, with A team’s

Yamase and Barker winning 3-0, and B

team’s Lucas Clarke and Archie Catnach

winning 3-1.

Lancaster University Table Tennis Club

definitely served up a storm at Roses 2023,

winning by a large margin, with the talliedup

scores being 14-3 for A team and 13-4

for B team. Congratulations!team’s Lucas

Clarke and Archie Catnach winning 3-1.

Lancaster University Table

Tennis Club definitely

served up a storm at Roses

2023, winning by a large

margin, with the tallied-up

scores being 14-3 for A

team and 13-4 for B team.

Congratulations!

Image Credits: Lancaster University Table

Tennis Club via FaceBook

A Lancaster Spin to Victory for Pole Fitness

Beth Train-Brown

WRITER

The only Roses competition to feature

Wednesday Addams, Dumbledore, and the

Mad Hatter

When it comes to performance, no one does

it like Pole Fitness. The Saturday in York

kicked off with a roaring crowd while 21

competitors frantically applied makeup and

boob tape in the dressing room.

Three award-winning judges sat poised (with

gin and pink lemonades) to score. Mr Pole

Fitness 2018, Liam Tipping. ‘A lighthouse of

weird’, Holly Baker. Showgirl x NHS Doctor,

Peachy.

Beginner Round

Following a powerful guest routine from

Giordaina Hartley, the opening routine came

from Lancaster’s Gina Grewcock, whose

Pirates of the Caribbean themed routine

included a confetti of chocolate coins.

Third place, however, went to SCAN’s own to

first-time competitor Lucy Whalen, for her

dance as the Mad Hatter to ‘White Rabbit’ by

Jefferson Airplane.

After falling short of placing in February’s

NUPDC competition, Lancaster’s Sophia

Robinson secured second place!

In first was Lancaster’s Raul Cazacu who won

Cheerleading just the day before. His show

stopping stage presence earned the judge’s

comment, ‘TENS ACROSS THE BOARD’!

Intermediate Round

Next was the most varied category in the

competition. (And a lot of dancers vying for

Best Costume!)

Ashley Eaton of Lancaster, covered head-totoe

in fake blood, performed the first chair

choreo, before K-Pop, Dolly Parton, and

Hamilton’s King George III made a cameo.

Emily Siu took third place, channelling

Wednesday Addams in a dramatic and

edgy routine to Lady Gaga’s ‘Bloody Mary’,

including a phenomenal flying backwardstag

spin.

In second came SCAN’s Beth Train-Brown.

Their unique ‘Dumbledore meets drag’ –

complete with a trans flag

magic wand and cross-knee layback to a

strip reveal – also earned them the coveted

Judge’s Choice Award.

First place went to York’s Anya Griffiths,

who, speaking with SCAN, said, ‘For my first

competition, my ultimate goal was to place

at all. To find out I won is amazing!’

Advanced Round

The final solo category saw Lancaster’s Daisy

Holley perform a spine-chilling contortion

routine and Lancaster’s Katherine Bontems

dedicate a beautiful dance to her loving

partner.

But third place went to York’s Will Hamill

with a country number, featuring their

trademark foot grip.

It was Lancaster’s Ana Ferreras Polo who

took second with an unforgettable bird spin

into a helix. The crowd loved her rendition

of ‘Dead Girl Walking’ from Heathers: The

Musical.

And in first place wass York’s Tania

Gardaševic who came onto stage in

chains; a captured demonic spirit.

Speaking with SCAN, she said: ‘I

don’t know where the idea for the

prop chains came from but I thought

doing a routine with my hands tied

would either fail or be epic so let’s go.’

Doubles Round

Y 3 - 14 L

Y 4 - 13 L

In third place were Griffiths (1st int.) and

Gardaševic (1st adv.) from York who gave

a sultry performance to Arctic Monkeys’

‘Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High?’

Hamill (3rd adv.) and Coby Horsley came

second for their dramatic routine inspired

by anime musical Death Note.

Although, despite being outnumbered, it was

Lancaster’s Holley and Emily de Naeyer’s

routine to ‘Get’cha Head in the Game’ from

High School Musical that took first place! The

only double in living memory to have used

a basketball prop on stage combined with

straddles and reverse-grip ayeshas. Despite

an ongoing knee injury, de Naeyer wowed

the crowd lifting Holley on her shoulders for

a two-tier vertical split.

Final Result

To the floor-shaking drum of the crowd,

York’s host announced that Lancaster,

winning all four categories, has taken the

win for the first time in over six years!

Y 0 - 4 L

Image Credits: Beth Train-Brown



26 R O S E S SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

R O S E S 27

Lancaster’s Volleyball Vengeance Lancaster Shoot Short at Netball

Hockey Club

Score Big!

Caitlyn Taft

Maisie Otterburn

ARTS & CULTURE EDITOR

WRITER

Two electrifying games as both teams were

neck and neck for the majority, though

Lancaster secured victory in both matches.

Men’s 1st Team Match

The men’s 1s played first, and even though I

watched this Roses match from home, you

could still hear the chants and excitement

from the crowd.

The first set was very close. If York scored

a point, there was no doubt that Lancaster

would score straight after them. Despite of

this, Lancaster men’s team ensured victory

for the first set, winning 25-23.

The teams headed into the second set with

the pressure building. York were the quicker

team out the blocks, taking a 10-6 lead.

Nevertheless a few attack blocks and spikes

from Lancaster that York were not able to

reach ensured a 25-20 win for Lancaster.

The third set proved

challenging for both teams.

Amidst the chaos of the ball

hitting the ceiling and then

a low hanging basketball

hoop, the set was won by

York.

With York building momentum, Lancaster

looked unsteady with the scores at 7-2 to

York. Despite Lancaster’s call for a time

out, the game continued to play into York’s

favour. With just two points needed for York

to win the set, Lancaster worked hard and

fast to bring their score up to 18, forcing

York to take a time out when the set had

previously looked comfortable. Despite their

comeback, York won the fourth set 25-18,

but Lancaster’s clawing back of momentum

proved definitive in the grander scheme of

the match.

The final set was a nervy occasion as the

noise level became deafening. Lancaster

coasted to 14, before an impeccable spike

ensured the Men’s 1s won three sets to two!

Women’s 1st

Team Match

The Women’s 1s followed on from the men’s

dramatic victory with a more dominant

victory.

Indeed, they started as they intended to go

on, leading York for a majority of the first

set, winning it by a comfortable five-point

margin.

The second set proved for

a rocky start for Lancaster.

But as they scored an ace,

they began to make a

comeback.

The set remained tightly contested,

bringing the score to 21-18 to York.

Needing some inspiration, Lancaster

called for a time out. Inspired they were,

scoring an ace as York’s confidence

began to crumble. As an attempt to

throw Lancaster off their roll, York

began to sub many of their players off the

court and then back on. But it was futile;

Lancaster won the second set.

Throughout the third set,

it was neck and neck.

The stakes were high,

with York fighting to stay

in the match.

A York time out disrupted Lancaster’s

flow and the game went to a deuce,

meaning each team needed to be two

points ahead to win. With the scores

locked at 29 apiece, Lancaster called

for a time out. Once again, the timeout was

perfectly timed, and Lancaster went on to

win the set 31-29, and therefore the match

3-0.

The Lancaster crowd were

cheering for both teams as

the tension was heavy on

the court.

Both teams, men’s and women’s, played

incredibly and all sets were exhilarating. The

Women’s 2s also won 2-0, whilst the men’s 2s

lost 2-0. Congratulations team!

Image Credits: @lancastersu via Instagram

‘I See Red’ LUDans Dazzle at Roses

song and routine.

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

In a completely packed central hall on

Saturday night, LUDans and UYDS took

to the stage to make us cry and blow our

minds.

Dance is broken down in to six categories,

with it being an even numbver if both teams

were to win three each, we would turn to

points from our judges, Joe Dubas, Alice

Boddy, and Lauren Richardson

Ballet

I sat with LuDans and cheer competitors,

and I am shocked I can still hear after the

screams of support from these girls, for their

friends and their opponents. First up we had

ballet, a beautiful and delicate routine from

Lancaster titled ‘Love Letters’, showing us

how important communicating with your

loved ones is. After thr first category, I am

left amazed that all these dancers don’t do

this full time, and are still working on their

degree alongside these spectacles!

Contemporary

After a short break we moved on to

contemporary, led by Lancaster’s

‘Selah’; a ground breaking and dramatic

performance, with lifts, falls, and skills you

would expect to see from a gymnast. Next,

York with ‘Bad Connection’, a harrowing

end with phone lights illuminating the

arena – this routine had cheers echoing

over the music.

Y 2 - 3 L

Tap

Next, Tap, a more light-hearted routine to

contrast the emotion of the contemporary

performance. Another nature themed

routine from Lancaster with ‘The Four

Seasons’ to portray the changing seasons,

with sounds of tap mimicking the falling

rain. A completely contrasting routine, York

opted for ‘A Century at the Movies’ with a

classic movie themed routine.

Jazz

Now halfway there, we progressed to Jazz,

and it is safe to say my preconception of Jazz

was way off. I was expecting something in

the same family as tap, and so I was stunned

to see Lancaster perform the showstopper

‘Red.’ With an energetic and passionate

performance to the very thematic song

‘Red’, Lancaster were spinning, jumping

and throwing themselves on the stage, as a

portrayal of raw emotion. This one seems to

be a fan favourite for sure.

Lyrical

I was intrigued to see what Lyrical really

was, and I have come to the conclusion

based on this event that it is sort of a blend

of Contemporary and Jazz, with a heavy

focus on the lyrics of the song to inform the

dance. Lancaster took a historic approach

with ’13 Horses’ which describes the survival

and struggle of hundreds of WWI horses

crossing the ocean. With more beautiful

red outfits, the team took to the stage for

another emotional whiplash of this sombre

Y 0 - 3 L

Street

The final category, snapping you back to the

present day, was Street. It was fun, energetic,

and was also perfect for a sing along with

Lancaster’s ‘Female Icons’ rocking the

stage, in black and red streetwear, and

white shoes, drawing your eye to each and

every move.

Results

Filled with anticipation, we moved on to the

results. Each choreographer of a winning

routine would come to the stage and collect

a trophy for each category.

York take Ballet, Lancaster take

Contempary, then York take Tap,

Lancaster Jazz, and now we are even at two

each… York are announced as the winners

of Lyrical and now the room is silent in

anxiety. Claiming the final category of

Street, York win four to Lancaster’s two.

The entire event was engaging and

exciting from start to finish, with barely

a seat left and a closed mouth by the end

of it all. With interval dances from both

York and Lancaster, if you don’t make it to

a dance showcase or Roses next year, you

are seriously missing out!

Y 4 - 2 L

Image Credits: Ami Clement

Lancaster University Netball

Club came up second in three

well fought matches on Super

Saturday.

3rd Team match

The incredible third team played

the first of three games in a day

full of netball. Playing with the

added pressure of being the first

event in Arena 1 on the varsity’s

main day, Saturday, they started

the match strong, scoring the first

goal quickly.

The defensive pressure throughout

all four quarters was solid; the

girls were effective in forcing

errors within York’s goal third.

Nonetheless, York began pulling

away in the second quarter,

finishing the first half 7 goals up.

However, coming into the second

half the girls really pulled it out of

the bag and kept themselves within

touching distance of the home

side. Despite some amazing effort,

York came away with the win.

However, the final score (40-42)

is still something to be incredibly

proud of, considering they were

down by 7 goals at half time! As

the Captain, Mary Smith, said, ‘we

are so proud of our team’ and ‘of

all the hard work the 3s have been

putting in’. An unfortunate loss

but an incredible effort from the

third team.

Y 42-40 L

2nd Team Match

Following the third’s game was

our amazing second team. It

took a while for the team to find

a foothold in the match, finishing

the first quarter having scored only

3 goals. However, in a show of true

Roses resilience, they started the

second quarter with vigour, giving

the substitutions made halfway

through this quarter a platform to

make a huge impact on the game.

The first half of the game ended

with York 26-12 ahead.

Nevertheless, the girls never gave

up and carried on fighting until

the very last whistle! The defensive

pressure and use of channels

down the court was impressive

throughout the whole match. The

shooters were putting up some

good shots and the centre court

players worked tirelessly to turn

over ball. Sadly, despite the girls

best efforts, the win went to York

(24-56) but as said by the cocaptains,

Ella Johnson and Em

Hulland, they are ‘so proud of the

determination and drive shown by

all of the girls’. The determination

and fire could definitely be seen

on court and the final score does

not properly reflect how well these

Roses played.

Y 56-24 L

1st Team Match

The final match, drawing the

netball competition to an end,

was played by the fantastic 1st

team. They started off really strong

and managed to pull away by a

couple of goals in the first quarter

finishing it with a score of 15-12.

Unfortunately, York wrestled back

momentum in the second quarter,

and with a sizeable crowd behind

them, never looked back.

The quality level of the match

truly reflected the hard work

both teams had poured into

their bootcamps. Lancaster were

particularly effective in threading

the ball down to the shooting

circle, but York spent the duration

of the second half painfully out of

reach. As captain Ellie Sherlock

said ‘I’m so proud of the progress

we’ve made as a team over the

season’, and they did indeed play

really well as a strong team but

unfortunately this match wasn’t

meant to be and the win went to

York (45-53).

Y 53-45 L

Image Credits: Maisie Otterburn

Rozen Zijn Rood: Korfball

Claims their Second Roses

Ami Clement

CHIEF EDITOR

The The Dutch sport Korfball was

introduced to Roses last year,

and Lancaster have started an

undefeated streak having added

to their fantastic win last year.

One of Lancaster’s most inclusive,

yet most niche sports, Korfball,

coached by Joe Price, still has a lot

of heads turning. With their game

on the Sunday Morning of Roses,

Korfball have been extremely busy

leading up to varsity.

A matter of weeks beforehand, the

Ligers took to Eindhoven, in The

Netherlands to compete in the

40th annual Attila tournament,

with a few days in Amsterdam

before heading back to prepare

for Roses.

As one of the few sports on campus

with only a mixed-gender team,

Korf has room for everyone. Here

you will find easily one of the most

diverse and committed teams

around. Having built a name for

themselves, their team, friends,

and spectators roared support,

rivalling the cheers coming from

Netball beside them.

The best way to describe Korf

is a mix between Netball and

Basketball. You can travel the full

way around the hoop, not just in

front of it (similar to how you can

go behind the net in Lacrosse)

and the attackers and defenders

switch frequently, so everyone has

a chance to attack and defend.

The rule is that there should

be equal males to females on

each team, so four each, and are

typically matched by height, so

as to make the game fair on both

teams sides.

The game itself was very even in

terms of possession, and points,

with Lancaster taking an early

lead before York soon caught up.

With countless shots perfectly on

target for both teams, with others

falling victim to luck as the ball

span around the hoop, both teams

seemed to be a very fair match,

more so than last year when

Lancaster dominated York.

In the final few minutes of the

game, York Korfball and the Ligers

were still sat even at 12-12. But,

with a last rush of adrenaline,

Lancaster fought for not only

one, but two more points, earning

them a dramatic 12-14 victory.

Captain Meg Matthews said ‘As

Captain, I’m going to be incredibly

cheesy and say that I couldn’t be

prouder of this team and what

we’ve accomplished this year. A

Roses victory is the perfect way

to round off a hugely successful

season!’

Who can blame the winners for

being a little cheesy following

a win. As seen in many games,

though, it was also bitter sweet as

the Summer Term means saying

goodbye to players you have

shared a court, and drinks with.

‘An extra congratulations to our

MVP Bethan, and also to Stevo for

his last ever Ligers game’

For any spectator, it is clear to

see how close the team is, and

how supportive they are of one

another, with personalised chants,

screaming support, and the best

group huddle hype sessions

(obviously finalised by a Ligers

call).

Both York and Lancaster

competitors seemed to get along

very well, finding unity in the

sport, and showing admirable

sportsmanship throughout. For

their first away win, and hopefully

last game as a zero point match,

Korfball are always eager to see

new faces at the club, so be sure to

keep an eye out on their Instagram

@lancsunikorfball.

Y 12 - 14

Image Credits: Ami Clement

Hockey Club Members

GUEST WRITERS

Lancaster’s Hockey Club

reigns victorious on the JLD,

bagging 10 points across all

their fixtures.

Women’s 1s

The Women’s 1 took to the

pitch with confidence and

determination, with Sophie

Bridges bagging a hat-trick

within the first ten minutes and

Abi Speight adding to the score

board with a fourth before the

end of the first half. Seeking

revenge for some tough results

for the hockey club in the 3rd

and 2nd team games, Lancaster

were in cruise control as they

held their composure with the

help of solid saves from Alex

Dougherty in goal.

York showed up in the second

half and made it more of a contest

as Lancaster conceded two well

worked goals from two penalty

corners but the team ultimately

controlled the game to the end.

A scintillating first half subdued

any chance of a comeback, the

match finished 4-2 to Lancaster.

The women’s first team capped

off an incredible season with a

BUCS league win and runners up

medal in the cup for the second

year running.

Men’s 1s

Finally, in the sixth and final

hockey fixture of the day on

the JLD, the men’s first team

continued their long-running

domination of this fixture,

having been undefeated since

2016. In what was a controlled

and calm display in front of

a hostile crowd, Lancaster

dominated proceedings.

The first goal came from Felix

Woods who scored on the stroke

of half time after a brilliant

team move, built from the back.

The perfect time to score. The

second half again was controlled

and measured with Dougie

Alexander scoring a Penalty

Flick with 12 minutes to go.

Another crucial time to score

to settle some nerves heading

into the final dying embers

of a fiercely competitive day,

Lancaster winning 2-0.

Results

In other matches, York won

Mixed Development with 3-0.

Both the women’s and men’s

second teams’ matches ended in

1-1 draws. Lancaster’s women’s

and men’s third teams lost 1-3

and 0-3 respectively. Lancaster

Hockey Club finished an historic

day with 10 points out of 14

secured for the university.

Y 4 - 10 L



28 R O S E S SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

R O S E S 29

American Football: Lancaster Bombarded

York Centurions

Alessandro Sardo

GUEST WRITER

After narrowly losing the league game

against the York Centurions, the Lancaster

Bombers knew what was at stake at Roses

2023.

As a result, preparation for the event was

intense. With adjusted schemes, new plays,

friendlies, and a two-week bootcamp during

Easter, the Bombers were ready to make a

fast start. And what better way than to bring

the lancaster Roses signature red smoke.

SUNDAY

Tom Jeffreys

SPORTS EDITOR

All three men’s rugby union teams lost in

tightly fought battles against experienced

opposition.

3rd Team Match

Aided by a superior away crowd and a huge

hit straight from kick-off, Lancaster had the

stronger start of the two sides.

However, York eventually settled into the

occasion and some missed tackles from

nervy Lancastrian defenders gifted York

a 14-0 lead heading into halftime. Ever

composed, captain Andy Roberts assured

his 20 Roses Debutants that they ‘were very

much in the game going into the second half’.

His inspiration was evident on the pitch,

as Lancaster rattled York with two tries

courtesy of Hugh Ainsworth and Peter

Gower to make the score 14-12.

With the sideline bouncing, Roberts

confessed that Lancaster’s downfall was that

their ‘energy was too high, and ill-discipline

crept in’. An over-eager defence resulted in

Lancaster going down to 13 men.

York capitalised ruthlessly, scoring two

converted tries, leaving the score at 26-12

in their favour. First blood was drawn from

York.

Y 26-12 L

1st Quarter

And start fast they did. Embracing the

challenge of starting on offence after the

Centurions won the toss and elected to defer,

the Lancaster Bombers managed to score on

their second offensive drive. The offensive

line led from the front, making huge gaps

for the running backs to exploit, eventually

allowing quarterback Ryan Want to find

Stannis Mathew for a nice gain. Ultimately,

with four yards to go, Kamil Zietara was able

to get into the end zone with massive help

from the offensive line. Alessandro Sardo

was able to convert the Point After

Touchdown (P.A.T) meaning Lancaster flew

into an early 7-0 lead.

The Bombers defence was then able to set

a precedent for the rest of the match, with

some solid work giving up very little ground

to the Centurions offence. A number of pass

bat downs, pass break downs and punts left

Lancaster 7-0 up heading into the second

quarter.

2nd Quarter

The second quarter proved more frustrating

for the Bombers. Lancaster were unable to

turn sustained pressure into points despite

some more hard runs. The highlight of this

quarter was an epic 4th down stop from the

Bombers’ linebacker Sam Rutterford, whose

tackle stopped a Centurion player two yards

away from scoring.

Unfortunately, the Centurions also had a

highlight this quarter with an interception

which was returned for a touchdown.

Having missed the P.A.T, York were flattered

by a 7-6 scoreline to Lancaster heading into

half time.

3rd Quarter

With the game being very close, it turned

into a war of attrition and field position for

both teams. The Bombers defence stood

their ground with some brute force and

tireless appetite for tackling. Starving York

of any chance to score, the Bombers defence

was finally rewarded for its hard work…

On the last play

of the quarter,

Tom Goodchild

consolidated some earlier good work in

forcing a fumble by intercepting a throw

and returning for a momentous touchdown.

Heading into the 4th and final quarter of

the game, Lancaster were sitting strong at a

deserved 13-6 lead.

4th Quarter

Being one full score up, the Lancaster

Bombers transitioned to a sensible, lowrisk

approach on offence by continuing to

rely on their running back duo of Sardo and

Zietara. With the running-centric strategy

running down the clock, Goodchild came

up with another interception leaving the

Centurions’ offence on the sideline yet

again, almost securing the historic away win

for The Lancaster Bombers.

The Bombers defence continued to hold firm

and with one final cover of a deep pass the

final whistle sounded, confirming that the

Lancaster Bombers had won Roses 2023!!

The scoreline, 13-6 to Lancaster, reflected

the gritty effort on display by all of the

Lancaster players and the consequent pitch

invasion reflected the hard work and passion

they had for the event. What a moment for

the leaving players and the team leaders,

their experience and enthusiasm will be

passed down to their rookie teammates.

Men’s Rugby Edged Out in

Three Thrillers

2nd Team Match

Off the back of a heavily disrupted season, the

twos headed into their match as underdogs.

With this spirit, Guy Stubbs and Callum

Reardon chased seemingly lost causes to

score, prompting pandemonium amongst

the Lancaster faithful. York thencounterattacked

with a try of their own, making the

scores to 10-7 to Lancaster at halftime.

Coming into a tense second half, York

quickly equalised the scores with a penalty,

before scoring a try from close out. A closerange

score from Matty Morgan made the

score 17-15 as the game prepared itself for a

frantic conclusion.

Crucially, York put the ball

in Lancaster’s court with

a well-finished try in the

corner, making it

22-15 with both

of Lancaster’s flyhalves

injured.

However, with an underdog

mentality their norm, they

attacked, and a sublime

kick-through by Archie

Rowbotham allowed him

to score in the corner with

just seconds to spare. 22-20

to York. The 2s fell painfully

and undeservedly short.

Y 22-15 L

1st Team Match

Arriving in York with a vengeance, Lancaster

exploded out of the blocks, decimating

York’s scrum. However, two well-placed

York kicks, aided by unpredictable bounces,

gave them a try against the run of play. A

penalty quickly followed and York had a

smash-and-grab 10-point lead. A flawless

Lancaster set piece earned them a penalty,

giving York a 10-3 lead at halftime.

Looking to tighten the pressure valve,

Lancaster began the second half with

substitutions a plenty. One such substitute,

Ewan Dean, registered Lancaster’s

Y 6 - 13 L

Image Credit: Abi Turner

first try as he burrowed over from close

range.

York then fired back with two tries,

exploiting a hungry Lancastrian defence by

cutting back against their tireless line speed.

The score was looking precarious at 22-8 to

the home side.

Realising the dominance up front, Lancaster

began tucking the ball up the jumper

and driving through the middle of York’s

defensive line, allowing Gordon Chung to

dot down. With York’s defence leaking in

the narrow channels, Lancaster found space

out wide to put Chris Rochelle in the corner,

but the conversion missed narrowly again to

leave the scores at 22-18 at full time.

Talismanic captain Henry

Horne summarised the

club’s attitude well: “Roses

means the world to us and

it’s a tough pill to swallow.

We go again next year”.

Y 22-18 L

We are not excluding the womens team, as

we could not make the game we asked for

their match report and did not hear back.

Image Credit: Abi Turner

LUBDS: Waltzing

Their Way to a

Win

Harriet Shillito

LIFESTYLE EDITOR

On the final day of Roses, 14

couples from Lancaster took

to the dancefloor against York

to compete head-to-head in

Ballroom and Latin, wowing the

crowd with their routines. With

four points at stake, “winner takes

all”, the event was brimming with

adrenalin: but it was Lancaster, in

the end, who brought the trophy

home.

The Ballroom Dance Sport

Society have worked tirelessly all

year to learn complex footwork;

perfecting their spins and honing

their frames, in preparation to

compete at Roses.

It was clear that York had done

the same: the level of talent was

astonishing, the room bursting

with cheering spectators.

The day was divided in half: the

Ballroom and Latin competitions

in the morning and afternoon

respectively. In true Ballroomcomp

style, the day was punctuated

by regular “fun-dances,” to unleash

the nervous energy in the room:

including the Cha-Cha Slide, the

Hokey-Cokey, and Viennese-

Waltz-themed Musical Chairs!

Ballroom

The morning consisted of five

different dance competitions: the

Waltz, Quickstep, Foxtrot, Tango

and Viennese Waltz. These were

divided into Beginner and Non-

Beginner Categories, and scored

by three professional Ballroom

judges, well-known in the amateur

Ballroom competition circuit.

It was an incredible morning

for the beginners, who won by

a landslide: four out of six waltz

finalists were Lancaster couples,

and four out of seven for quickstep.

Lancaster’s own Craig Lyons

and Ellie Johnston triumphed,

taking first place for both dances

– an incredible feat which won

proud cheers from their team –

and secured the first point for

Lancaster.

The non-beginners also delivered

an astonishing score, with

Lancaster couples securing four

out of seven finalist places for

waltz, quickstep, and foxtrot.

Lancaster’s President, Elisabeth

Bancroft, and Co-Team Captain,

Ellie Rhodes, ranked second place

overall, with their impeccable

performance and effortless

technique. But it was York that

bagged the point, with their

leading ballroom couple taking

first place.

Latin

The afternoon consisted of five

different dance competitions: the

Cha-Cha-Cha, Jive, Samba, Rumba

and Paso Doble. Again, these were

divided into Beginner and Non-

Beginner Categories, scored by the

same judges.

Both teams excelled in the

afternoon – bring out the tunes,

and Lancaster brings out the

moves! The beginner couples

took four out of the six finalist

places for both Cha-Cha-Cha,

Jive, and Samba, with Emily Wild

and Marie Smith striking gold for

all three dances. An incredible

achievement, that secured

Lancaster our second point.

Meanwhile, the non-beginner

couples shone in Cha-Cha-Cha,

Samba and Jive, taking first,

second, third, fourth and fifth

place for all three dances – an

unforgettable moment for the

team. Then LUBDS’ Co-Team

Captain Laura Blanchard and

Media and Communications

officer Natina Wong took the

victory, securing Lancaster the

final point needed to win the day!

This astounding result is a

testament to the relentless effort,

and the wonderful comradery of

the team – their enthusiasm and

support for each other is truly

heart-warming and made for a

brilliant day in York. Through this

dance competition LUBDS proved,

once and for all, that roses are, in

fact, red.

Flying Fish complete

Ultimate Frisbee REDWASH

Amelia Daniels

CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR

Lancaster Fish dominated York

in every game. But it wasn’t just

their clean sweep that made this

sport so enjoyable to watch.

Ultimate Frisbee is respectful, it’s

intense, and it caters for

different attention spans.

And most of all, it completes

Redwashes, with Lancaster Fish

winning all six of their matches!

Indoor

One of our highlights was the

Men’s Indoor where there was

a literal

f l y i n g

fish!

To score a point, a Lancaster

player jumped, caught the frisbee

mid-air and propelled

themselves so that they landed in

the end zone (and nearly took out

the camera man!).

Unfortunately, this was not caught

by the live broadcast so you will

have to take our word

for it that it was amazing.

Watching this game was like

attending a metal gig and the

symphony orchestra all at

once. Players were getting up in

eachother’s faces, trying to block

their shots and steal the

disk, whilst at other points the

teams were huddled together

having democratic discussions.

This was because the game is selfumpired,

and the teams pause to

discuss contested points

or inappropriate play. At the

end they all have a debrief

and decide if the game was

played

fairly. It’s great to see

such a level of respect and

sportsmanship displayed

even in the face

of fierce competition.

The indoor matches were

intense to watch. This was

because the games were only

20-30 minutes, and the court is

small in comparison to the outside

pitch. Play

was fast and ferocious. However, it

was also very precise because the

players had to adjust

their throws for the size of the

space.

Outdoor

The outdoor games carried all of

the same fire and determination of

the indoor but

was sustained across a much

longer time period. The Mixed

Outdoor Open ran for an hour

and a half and was slower paced to

allow for some real tactics to take

place.

For comparison, indoor takes

place in a space the size of a netball

court, outdoor

happens on a football pitch, there

is a bit difference in size. This did

not mean teams took a relaxed

approach, they were darting all

over the pitch, making the most of

the space.

The pitch size also led to some

really risky plays where players

were diving across the

pitch to catch the disk. An

interesting rule is that if you fall,

as long as the disk does not

touch the floor, it remains in play.

Y 1 - 3 L

Image Credit: John Admans

This meant that players could use

their bodies to block

the disk from hitting the floor,

then pick themselves off the floor

and resume play. As a result of

all of this, the games were much

higher scoring affairs, with all

three of Lancaster’s teams scoring

15 points as they swept York away

to complete a dreamy weekend.

Ultimate Frisbee really was a

game where it was impossible to

look away. There were six games

in total and the points went as

follows:

Indoor

Lancaster York

Mixed: 7 1

Men’s: 4 3

Women’s: 8 5

Outdoor

Lancaster York

Mixed: 15 7

Men’s: 15 10

Women’s: 15 2

Y 0 - 6 L

Image Credit: Ami Clement, @Lancaster_LUMC

Climbing:

Lancaster

Reach Highest

Charles Dryer

GUEST WRITER

Lead Climbing –

Saturday

With 19 competitors making their

way down to York, and 16 points

across eight categories on offer for

the overall Roses score, climbing

took on an increased significance

for Roses this year. Competing on

both the Saturday and Sunday,

the weekend was guaranteed to be

filled with excitement.

On the Saturday climbers made

the trek to Partheon Climbing

centre in Harrogate for our

Lead competition. Lead is roped

climbing focusing on endurance,

challenging competitors with

sustained, difficult routes. It

was incredibly tight in the team

and individual competitions,

with draws in the men’s and

women’s categories. However,

Sam L managed to win the men’s

individual in stunning fashion.

Amidst standout performances

on the day from all, club president

Becky S and Tom W earned Most

Valuable Player (MVP awards for

their heroic efforts in the qualifiers

and finals.)

Bouldering – Sunday

Coming into day two hype was

certainly high. A fresh wave of

climbers for bouldering headed

off to Freeklime York. With 21

qualifier boulders to complete the

competition was very tough, with

both teams losing closely to York

in the overall competition.

Nonetheless, optimism was high

going into the finals. With a

big crowd packing out the hall,

four high-quality boulders each

and only four minutes a climb,

competitors came out two by two

to give their all.

With nail biting slabs, feet over

head and an incredible 1 finger

hang switch there was plenty of

excitement. In the end, captain

Rhiannon S and Sam “god” L were

our MVPs, with strong third and

first finishes respectfully.

Y 0 - 16 L



30 R O S E S SCANLU SCANLancaster scan.lancastersu.co.uk

scan.lancastersu.co.uk SCANLU SCANLancaster

R O S E S 31

Lancaster Batters York at Cricket

Will Jones

WRITER

The matches took place over the Saturday

and Sunday where Lancaster battered York

and left triumphant.

Lancaster Men’s 3s vs

York Men’s 3s

After that inspiring 2s performance, Jacob

Brown led his troops out to field for their

T20 match on the Saturday evening. The

3s fielded well with a strong bowling

performance from fresher Myles Govus,

who picked up 3 wickets. York finished the

innings on 102, a below par score reflective

of an inspired fielding team.

Lancaster came out for

the second innings full of

confidence and expressed

themselves with the bat.

Excellent performances with the bat from

Max Elvidge, Will Shurrock and Obaid

Obaid. The most appropriate way to

describe the game was a total battering of

York by Lancaster.

The celebrations began and continued into

the early hours. The 2s had done it, the 3s

had done it, Could the 1s do it? The stage

was set for an epic showdown…

Lancaster Men’s 2s vs

York Men’s 2s

It was an early start for the 2s

on an overcast day in York,

where the wicket was

damp. It was prime

bowling conditions,

and Lancaster

began on the back

foot as York won

the toss and chose

to bowl. York got

off to a flying start,

with Lancaster

just 21 for 6. It was

looking like a repeat

of last year’s disaster

for the 2s.

With this in mind,

Lancaster’s middle order

dug in, with Ryan Ambanpola

and Ben Grimmitt showing grit

to shift the momentum and see the

innings through to a total of 92.

The lads were pumped walking on to the

pitch for the second innings. However,

testament to the chaos of the fixture, York

were 51 for 1 and a loss for Lancaster looked

likely. And yet, in another unlikely twist,

Saad Adeem and Ryan Ambanpola began

a weekend-defining bowling spell. The

change worked, wickets kept on coming

and the game was unbelievably edging in

Lancaster’s favour.

It all came down

to the last

over.

York needed 1 to

win with 1 wicket

left. Saad Adeem

ran at the crease.

You could hear

a pin drop the

atmosphere was

so tense. Adeem,

with ice in his

veins, bowled the

perfect yorker to

York’s number 11.

The bails went flying,

followed by a pitch invasion

and an eruption of noise. The

2s had won by the barest of margins.

Lancaster Men’s 1s vs York

Men’s 1’s

The 1s got off to a flyer with a 50-opening

partnership from Matthew Cook and

Shahzaib Khan, putting the 1s in a

fantastic position to build the innings. The

partnership came to an end which meant

it was time to see club legend, Viraat Sahu,

showcase his eloquent cover drive. Falling

just short of a half-century, Sahu helped the

1s set a defendable total of 172.

The second innings was full of ebbs and

flows. A strong start by Lancaster’s bowling

attack preceded a fight back by York’s

middle order, who became set to ruin the

redwash party.

Was a redwash too much

to ask? Right at the death,

Lancaster’s golden boy,

Abdul Wasey Mohammad,

steamed in and cleared

up York’s lower order to

secure victory. The 1s did it.

History makers. The club’s

first redwash in history.

Y 0 - 3 L

Image Credits: @lancastersu

via Instagram

Basket Ball-in

Josh Perrett

SPORTS EDITOR

Roses weekend is known for its high octane

sports that consistently draw sizeable

crowds. However, few sports can compare

to the show that was basketball. SCAN’s

Joshua Perrett writes about two tough, but

winnable games for Lancaster.

Women’s

It was a difficult start for Lancaster, as York

flew to a 14-1 lead. The pressure from the

York crowd was heavy but Lancaster rose

to the challenge, clawing the score back to

24-12.

Rejuvenated by the

halftime break, Lancaster

mounted a comeback

for the ages. Dictating

the game at their

pace, the 3rd quarter

ended 31-30 to

York. Suddenly, it

was clear to York

spectators that

the game was far

from guaranteed. A

tense yet explosive

atmosphere

swallowed the show

court.

The whistle blew and both

teams stepped onto the court

ready to do anything for victory.

The final quarter was nothing short

of spectacular to watch, with both teams

trading points, desperately looking to settle

the crowds. No gap emerged, however, until

the dying embers of a fiery game, where

York managed to establish a decisive fourpoint

lead, earning them a dramatic 48-44

victory.

After the match, we asked women’s team

captain Natasha to explain how they

mounted their epic comeback:

“We have to thank our

teammate Kitty, she was

the spark that ignited our

offensive run to equalize

the score, we began to

switch from individual to

zone defence to force

further shots. That helped

us to dimmish point scoring

from York”.

We also asked the captain

what she thought

about her team’s

commitment to

never giving up

on the court:

“ T e a m

chemistry

was great as

it was built

throughout

the season.

We focused

the most on

individual skill

and made rest

days important,

the team wanted

to go to York healthy,

not over-worked.”

This game was a real nail-biter,

despite the close defeat, we were hungry for

more with the Men up next

Y 48 - 44 L

Men’s

Both teams wasted no time in getting

scores on the board. The first quarter

began with York gaining a small edge that

was quickly shutdown by Lancaster, who

secured themselves a tight 19-17 lead.

York began the second quarter by retaking

the lead from Lancaster with a quick 5

points. This, however, left the Mens squad

completely unfazed as they forced an

impressive 34-30 lead at halftime.

Men’s captain Guillermo told SCAN that he

was confident in his team regardless of how

close the match was:

“This year most of the

games have been close

for us. We have learned to

fight until the end and have

trust in the team. We had

3 weeks of bootcamp with

more than 3 practices a

week”

As the 3rd quarter began the crowds

became electric. Intoxicated on the chants

led by the women’s teams, both defences

pushed back against unrelenting attacks

but the quarter ended at a nail biting 44-44,

setting up a thrilling last quarter.

When the final quarter began it was clear

that this was going to be down to the last

scraps of points. Both teams fought hard

to gain a significant lead but to no avail.

Unbelievably, the game was still tied at 56-

56 going into the last 20 seconds, until York

was awarded 2 free throws and made both,

58-56.

Despite both of Lancaster unfortunate

defeats this year, I can say with confidence

that Basketball was easily one of the

best events to watch and would highly

recommend watching the fixture next

year for amazingly close games and a

phenomenal atmosphere.

For the closing ceremony, altough Lancaster

would have obviously loved a win, at least

both teams and all the spectators could

enjoy the trophy coming home with for the

second year in a row.

Y 58 - 56 L

Images Credit: Josh Perrett



32

SCAN Puzzles: Roses Edition

W O R D S E A R C H

C R O S S W O R D

S C A N D O K U

1) ____, violets are blue (5,3,3)

8) Disturbance (8)

9) Gin cocktail (7)

11) Arachnid (6)

12) Place after eighth (5)

13) Record (3)

15) Levied (5)

17) Baseball four-pointer (4, 3)

2) Peat moss (8)

3) Roughly outline (6)

4) Biannual worldwide event

(7)

5) Beliefs (5)

6) Fortune teller’s technique

(4,7)

7) Pasta case (7)

10) Steady, not wavering (11)

13) Boulevards (5)

A C R O S S

D O W N

19) Observed (8)

21) Started (5)

23) Emergency signal (1,1,1)

24) Small shack (5)

25) Set up tents (6)

27) Disc-throwing sport (7)

28) Green vegetable (8)

29) Was next to (11)

14) Biological classification

(5)

15) Container (3)

16) Wear (3)

18) Improve (7)

20) Suspended transport (5,3)

22) Teeing, putting, etc. (7)

24) Gambling hall (6)

25) Liable to (e.g.) accidents

(5)

W O R D S E A R C H

ARCHERY

BADMINTON

BASKETBALL

CANOE

CHEER-

LEADING

CHESS

CLIMBING

CRICKET

CROQUET

CYCLING

DARTS

DEBATE

EQUESTRIAN

E-SPORTS

FENCING

FOOTBALL

FUTSAL

HANDBALL

LACROSSE

LIFTING

NETBALL

POLE FITNESS

POLO

POOL

ROWING

RUGBY

SAILING

SNOOKER

SNOWSPORTS

TENNIS

TRAMPOLINE

ULTIMATE

FRISBEE

You loved them last time, so it looks like they are here to

stay! Try out our brand new puzzles! Think you’ve got them

all right? Make sure to follow us on Instagram

@SCANLancaster where we will be posting the answers!

All Puzzles By Dan Power

All Puzzles By Dan Power

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