A Short Break in London
Jim Turner
Jim Turner
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Life as a ‘Tuber’<br />
A <strong>Short</strong> <strong>Break</strong> <strong>in</strong> <strong>London</strong><br />
Although we’d been together for some time, with me now at eighty and June<br />
fast approach<strong>in</strong>g the same, we decided that we should get married. So, on the<br />
week of her eightieth birthday, we officially tied the knot <strong>in</strong> the Bideford<br />
registry office. It was a lovely family occasion, duly followed by a small<br />
reception for about forty family and friends <strong>in</strong> our house <strong>in</strong> Ilfracombe.<br />
A few days later we travelled up to <strong>London</strong> to stay <strong>in</strong> the Union Jack Club at<br />
Waterloo where we would quietly celebrate our marriage by hav<strong>in</strong>g a romantic<br />
short break. The UJ Club was established to provide a base for current serv<strong>in</strong>g<br />
and former military personnel when visit<strong>in</strong>g the capital - and I, hav<strong>in</strong>g<br />
previously served <strong>in</strong> the RAF, f<strong>in</strong>d it ideal for us when we’re <strong>in</strong> <strong>London</strong>.<br />
On our first morn<strong>in</strong>g, we had a most <strong>in</strong>formative guided architectural tour of<br />
the beautiful Royal Opera House <strong>in</strong> Covent Garden. This was followed by an<br />
afternoon <strong>in</strong> St Mart<strong>in</strong> <strong>in</strong> the Fields, just off Trafalgar Square. There we listened<br />
to a classical music concert by a quartet of piano, viol<strong>in</strong>, viola and cello – a<br />
beautiful comb<strong>in</strong>ation.<br />
Follow<strong>in</strong>g the concert, we made our way back to Waterloo, where we knew of<br />
a nice restaurant where June could have an even<strong>in</strong>g meal and I, hopefully,<br />
would be able to have someth<strong>in</strong>g prepared specially for me by the chef - or<br />
more usually if that was not possible, sit and have a couple of bottles of my<br />
Ensure 2Cal, which I always take with me when we go out anywhere.<br />
We had previously d<strong>in</strong>ed <strong>in</strong> other branches of this restaurant and found them<br />
very sympathetic to my special requirements. Even if the chef was unable to<br />
properly liquidise someth<strong>in</strong>g for me, I could always sit and have my bottles<br />
whilst June would have someth<strong>in</strong>g from the menu.<br />
With that <strong>in</strong> m<strong>in</strong>d, we subsequently took the underground back to Waterloo<br />
and strolled along to the South Bank complex, where the restaurant was<br />
situated. So far, our romantic stay was go<strong>in</strong>g extremely well.<br />
“A table for two sir, madam?”<br />
“Yes please”, June, who was <strong>in</strong> front of me replied to the waitress. “But only<br />
one person for eat<strong>in</strong>g,” she added. “My husband has a hidden disability and
can’t take anyth<strong>in</strong>g by mouth. He has to br<strong>in</strong>g his own feed<strong>in</strong>g equipment and<br />
specially prepared liquid food. Is that ok?”<br />
“I’ll go and speak to the manager.” The waitress replied, “In the meantime,<br />
would you like to take a seat?”<br />
I had spied an unoccupied table for two <strong>in</strong> a nice quiet corner and usher<strong>in</strong>g<br />
June towards it, I said to the waitress, “Shall we go over there?” S<strong>in</strong>ce<br />
becom<strong>in</strong>g a ‘tuber’ I’ve learnt that when it comes to restaurants and other<br />
such-like establishments, it pays to be quietly and politely assertive.<br />
We made our way to the table and sat down while June started to peruse the<br />
menu. From my small back-pack, I took out the two bottles conta<strong>in</strong><strong>in</strong>g my<br />
‘even<strong>in</strong>g meal’, along with my syr<strong>in</strong>ge, extension tube and pack of paper<br />
napk<strong>in</strong>s, and placed them prom<strong>in</strong>ently on the table. (I f<strong>in</strong>d it easier to produce<br />
everyth<strong>in</strong>g for the restaurant staff to see, rather than try to expla<strong>in</strong> why I can’t<br />
eat. It’s also particularly helpful if the staff are non-English speakers).<br />
In no time at all, the manager, came rush<strong>in</strong>g up to our table and quite loudly<br />
said that it was company policy not to allow people to br<strong>in</strong>g their own food<br />
<strong>in</strong>to the restaurant and we would have to leave. We expla<strong>in</strong>ed that we<br />
understood that, but as I was unable to consume anyth<strong>in</strong>g at all by mouth, I<br />
had to have specially prepared liquid food which wasn’t available <strong>in</strong> the<br />
restaurant. I told him that all I wanted to do was sit quietly, and discretely<br />
adm<strong>in</strong>ister my nutrition while my wife enjoyed her meal. I also added that all I<br />
asked of his restaurant was a glass of water.<br />
He just wouldn’t listen to what we were say<strong>in</strong>g. All he could do was keep<br />
argu<strong>in</strong>g and repeat<strong>in</strong>g that it was ‘Company Policy <strong>in</strong> case anyth<strong>in</strong>g happened’. I<br />
wasn’t sure what he thought could happen by my consum<strong>in</strong>g my own food.<br />
I started to get quite irate at this po<strong>in</strong>t and rather forcefully told him that my<br />
condition was <strong>in</strong> fact, a hidden disability and that he was required to<br />
accommodate me. I also expla<strong>in</strong>ed to him that my wife and I had frequented<br />
many eat<strong>in</strong>g establishments world wide, as well as other branches of his<br />
restaurant <strong>in</strong> and around <strong>London</strong> and this was the very first time I’d ever been<br />
told I couldn’t consume my own specially prepared food while my wife ate<br />
someth<strong>in</strong>g from the menu. As this was creat<strong>in</strong>g a bit of a scene <strong>in</strong> the<br />
restaurant, he eventually capitulated and decided to allow me ‘on this one<br />
occasion’, to consume my own food.
Had it not been so late <strong>in</strong> the even<strong>in</strong>g, now that I had made my po<strong>in</strong>t, I would<br />
have walked out and found somewhere else - but as we were both tired and<br />
hungry after our busy day, we decided to stay, have our meal and just let th<strong>in</strong>gs<br />
ride for the moment.<br />
June subsequently ordered the egg ratatouille, which turned out to be delicious<br />
and I proceeded to adm<strong>in</strong>ister my bottles of Ensure 2Cal via my syr<strong>in</strong>ge and<br />
extension tube.<br />
However, I have to say that <strong>in</strong> the manager’s favour when I asked for the bill, he<br />
came up to our table and <strong>in</strong>formed us that there would be no charge and to<br />
accept his apologies. I thanked him gracefully, but also suggested that he<br />
should <strong>in</strong>form himself of the various requirements <strong>in</strong> place when deal<strong>in</strong>g with<br />
people like me who have special needs - whether they be hidden or visible<br />
disabilities.<br />
Hav<strong>in</strong>g undergone the stress of hav<strong>in</strong>g to argue with the manager, the edge<br />
had completely been taken off what should have been a perfect day for us and<br />
we both felt rather deflated as we made our way back to the UJ Club. However,<br />
the experience of that episode only re<strong>in</strong>forced my resolve not to just stand<br />
back and meekly accept what jobsworths tell us.<br />
In complete contrast, the next morn<strong>in</strong>g at breakfast we were welcomed with<br />
open arms by the brilliant restaurant staff at the Union Jack Club. They couldn’t<br />
do enough for me. The head waiter actually accompanied me around the<br />
breakfast buffet while I chose my breakfast of an orange, banana, apple,<br />
yoghurt and oats. He then took my bowl <strong>in</strong>to the kitchen to liquidise it, add<strong>in</strong>g<br />
a variety of berries and full fat milk to make up the required quantity. One of<br />
my favourite breakfasts - almost like be<strong>in</strong>g at home. Then to cap it all, the<br />
manager came to see me, ask<strong>in</strong>g if everyth<strong>in</strong>g was to my lik<strong>in</strong>g and add<strong>in</strong>g that<br />
if I needed anyth<strong>in</strong>g at all, to let her know.<br />
On the whole, our romantic short break <strong>in</strong> <strong>London</strong> turned out to be a huge<br />
success for us and apart from the restaurant episode, I found that no matter<br />
where I went, people <strong>in</strong> cafes, restaurants and public places were more than<br />
helpful and always extremely sympathetic to my special requirements as a<br />
‘tuber’.<br />
Jim Turner