Uncle Andy's Digest - July 2024
Summer is Here and The Heat Is On! If you haven't picked up a copy of the July 2024 edition of Uncle Andy's Digest, you can read it here. As always you'll find the best of what local businesses have to offer. As well, you'll find great stories, Funny Jokes, Punny Fun, hilarious one-liners, and Fun at our out-and-abouts. Shop local, and find the best central Maine businesses to serve your needs and wants. Stay Cool!
Summer is Here and The Heat Is On! If you haven't picked up a copy of the July 2024 edition of Uncle Andy's Digest, you can read it here. As always you'll find the best of what local businesses have to offer. As well, you'll find great stories, Funny Jokes, Punny Fun, hilarious one-liners, and Fun at our out-and-abouts. Shop local, and find the best central Maine businesses to serve your needs and wants. Stay Cool!
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UNCLE<br />
DIGEST<br />
ANDY’S<br />
Your local guide to... well, just about anything!<br />
JULY<br />
<strong>2024</strong><br />
SINCE 1996<br />
207.740.9053<br />
25 Lisbon St. Lewiston | 207THC.com<br />
Spin The Wheel<br />
Saturday Discounts<br />
Every Saturday in <strong>July</strong> spin<br />
the wheel for possible discounts!<br />
207-782-7113<br />
Technician<br />
Wanted<br />
Apply Within!<br />
31 Blake Street, Lewiston • armandsautobody.com<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 1
Just watched my neighbor fill his canoe with ice cream and rootbeer.<br />
Kinda strange but hey, whatever floats his boat.<br />
Welcome to the Minot Avenue Auburn Roopers –<br />
one of the busiest stores in our entire fleet. Established<br />
by Steve Roop in 2004, Minot Avenue has<br />
blossomed into a beloved local hotspot, known for<br />
its vibrant atmosphere and exceptional service.<br />
Welcome to Minot Ave<br />
Minot Avenue boasts a diverse selection of beers<br />
and wines, catering to a variety of tastes and preferences.<br />
Our store has earned a fine reputation for<br />
stocking hard-to-find favorites, making it a go-to<br />
destination for enthusiasts and casual shoppers<br />
alike. Our loyal regulars love our staff. Our team<br />
has quickly adapted, gaining momentum and<br />
building strong relationships with our dedicated<br />
customers.<br />
In addition to being one of the busiest storefronts,<br />
Minot Avenue also houses one of the most active<br />
redemption centers in the area.<br />
The next time you find yourself in the area, we<br />
invite you to stop by and say hello to our<br />
dedicated crew. Experience firsthand the warm,<br />
welcoming environment that makes Minot Avenue<br />
Auburn Roopers a favortie destination of Lewiston/<br />
Auburn. Cheers friends!<br />
301 Main St., Auburn | 783.9098<br />
545 Minot Ave., Auburn | 783.2047<br />
980 Main St., Oxford | 539.6072<br />
794 Sabattus St., Lewiston | 783.6353<br />
686 Main St., Lewiston | 344.1200<br />
1420 Lisbon St., Lewiston | 333.3095<br />
Regretfully, I’ve had to shut down my chicken dating site.<br />
I just couldn't make hens meet.
A word of advice... don't give it.<br />
We’re here for you<br />
Modern Woodmen of America continues to be strong and stable, even in these times of<br />
uncertainty. We’ve been around since 1883, standing strong through world wars, national<br />
disease outbreaks, depressions and recessions.<br />
Do you have questions or concerns about your financial plan, call today. We will continue<br />
to be here for you.<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
I’m<br />
proud to be a sponsor<br />
of this tournament!<br />
(Owner of Fisherman’s Net)<br />
Paul Colasante*<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-782-8823<br />
Art Chamberlain*<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-514-7003<br />
Mike<br />
Courtemanche*<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-783-8921<br />
Jim Barnes & Nikki<br />
Canney<br />
Richard<br />
Courtemanche<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-786-3622<br />
Stacy Fortin<br />
Rumford, ME 04276<br />
207-357-5429<br />
Paul Gagne*<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-576-3426<br />
John Moran<br />
& Noah Barnes<br />
Ted Heidrich*<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-576-5656<br />
Ron Ouellette*<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-786-3612<br />
Kim Pelkey*<br />
Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
207-786-2573<br />
Jake Verrill<br />
& John Roy<br />
* Registered representative. Securities offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned<br />
subsidiary of Modern Woodmen of America. Member: FINRA, SIPC<br />
When I wrapped my coworker's candy bars in different wrappers she got<br />
her Snickers in a Twix.<br />
Nathan St. Laurent<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 3
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
is published by the first Friday<br />
of every month by Lydia<br />
Media LLC with its world<br />
headquarters located at 2<br />
Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B,<br />
Auburn, Maine, USA.<br />
Published and distributed<br />
since 1996 throughout<br />
Central Maine and mailed to<br />
subscribers all over the Free<br />
World. Subscriptions are<br />
$49 .95 /year.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com<br />
Office: 207-783-7039<br />
Our Team<br />
PAM<br />
ASHBY<br />
PUBLISHER<br />
STEVE<br />
SIMARD<br />
SALES<br />
STEPHANIE<br />
ASSELIN<br />
SALES<br />
We’ll<br />
we’ll<br />
help<br />
you<br />
Smile<br />
Again!<br />
NASA's launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens.<br />
They're calling it the Apollo G.<br />
Smile Again<br />
Dentures<br />
Like our<br />
name<br />
implies,<br />
STEPHANIE<br />
ARSENAULT<br />
OFFICE<br />
MANAGER<br />
TOM HILL<br />
IT • WEB<br />
TIM<br />
ELWELL<br />
GRAPHIC<br />
DESIGNER<br />
CARICATURES COURTESY OF<br />
J. ANTHONY FIORI<br />
While <strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
tries very hard to ensure the<br />
accuracy of the information in our<br />
clients’ advertisements and our<br />
publication in general, we are not<br />
responsible for vendor availability,<br />
typographical errors, technical<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> inaccuracies, Andy’s product <strong>Digest</strong> pricing<br />
errors, or omissions.<br />
4 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Mike<br />
Adkins, LD<br />
Cassandra<br />
Gagnon, LD<br />
Licensed Denturists<br />
514-0660<br />
Joe<br />
Adkins, LD<br />
801 Webster Street, Lewiston<br />
SmileAgainDentures.com<br />
smileagaindentures@gmail.com<br />
• Full Dentures<br />
• Immediate<br />
Dentures<br />
• Partial<br />
Dentures<br />
• Rebases<br />
• Relines<br />
• Repairs<br />
Call For A Free<br />
Consultation<br />
The teenage bear sulked when his parents said he couldn't go to the<br />
maul with his friends.
There’s No Place Like...<br />
Your one-stop<br />
shop for:<br />
• Amazing food<br />
(eat in or take out)<br />
• Agency liquor store<br />
with beer cave<br />
Agency Liquor Store & Beer Cave.<br />
• Lottery tickets<br />
• Redemption center<br />
Grab n’ Go Items Everyday!<br />
DONATE YOUR BOTTLES TO<br />
Fresh Green Mountain Coffee.<br />
WE CATER<br />
Full serve catering at the location of your choice.<br />
Help grant a wish to a local child<br />
battling a critical illness<br />
207-345-5551<br />
Dad’s Redemption Center<br />
BOOK YOUR<br />
<strong>2024</strong><br />
CORPORATE<br />
EVENTS<br />
NOW!<br />
207-345-9009<br />
DadsPlaceCatering.com<br />
REDEMPTION CENTER<br />
6 ¢<br />
on all 5¢ returns with this coupon.<br />
Located in the building behind Dad’s Place<br />
Hours: Wednesday - Sunday 9am - 5pm<br />
(closed Mondays, Tuesdays, & Major Holidays)<br />
(must present coupon at Redemption Center prior to counting) <strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s UAD <strong>Digest</strong> exp. 7.31.24<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 5<br />
23 Pleasant Street, Mechanic Falls • www.dadsplacemaine.com
In 3,026 years, life will either be really good or really bad. It's 50 50.<br />
Quality Products<br />
Reasonable Pricing<br />
Happy 4th of <strong>July</strong>,<br />
Neighbor<br />
Always a call or click away!<br />
Call, click or stop by today.<br />
Let’s talk today!<br />
Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.®<br />
CALL ME TODAY.<br />
30 years<br />
in business.<br />
Hats<br />
Now offering<br />
online stores<br />
Contractors<br />
and<br />
Landscapers<br />
Summer Outings<br />
Summer Camps<br />
Golf Tournaments<br />
Mugs<br />
Pens<br />
Pens<br />
Bags<br />
Call us for a quote TODAY!<br />
207-784-4184<br />
205 Washington St. South, Auburn<br />
coastaltshirts.com<br />
WHO DO YOU KNOW THAT COULD USE A SHOUT OUT?<br />
Scan<br />
here<br />
or go<br />
to our<br />
website<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com to<br />
give someone you<br />
know who deserves<br />
a SHOUT OUT in<br />
next months issue!<br />
Happy birthday to one<br />
of the best<br />
friends/person I know!<br />
Happy 40th Birthday<br />
to Candace Morneau<br />
Durgin! Love, Steph.<br />
To Marcus! Stop<br />
eyeballing my burger!<br />
Love, <strong>Uncle</strong> Tom<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
6 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
I find it odd that we all have at least one kitchen counter. But most of us only have one<br />
kitchen.
MAINE’S #1 STEAKHOUSE<br />
We are celebrating our 30 TH<br />
anniversary<br />
in august<br />
HAPPY<br />
ANNIVERSARY<br />
Check our Facebook<br />
posts for information<br />
about our celebration.<br />
We will be celebrating<br />
all month long in August!<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 7<br />
1052 Minot Avenue, Auburn • 783-6885 • MacsGrill.com
Out and About<br />
Ribbon Cutting<br />
At Dirigo Federal<br />
Credit Union<br />
Justin & Neville<br />
Campbell<br />
Wizardry<br />
Submitted by Stephanie<br />
Arsenault<br />
I was a little kid,<br />
walking past my dad,<br />
who was relaxing in his<br />
recliner, with his shoes<br />
off, socks on, feet up,<br />
drinking a beer watching<br />
wrestling on TV.<br />
I got a whiff of his<br />
smelly feet, and I said,<br />
“Oh my God, Dad,<br />
your feet smell really<br />
bad.” My dad waved<br />
his hands at me, like<br />
he was casting a spell<br />
on me, and said, “I put<br />
a hex on you, that your<br />
feet will smell worse<br />
than mine!” I’m all,<br />
“Yah right.”<br />
Years later, I’m working<br />
a full time job, running<br />
around on my feet all<br />
day. I get home, take<br />
my shoes off, and my<br />
feet smelled so bad.<br />
It dawned on me right<br />
then, my dad,<br />
...was a powerful<br />
wizard.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
8 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
It was when the dinosaur took a shower that they became ex-stinked.<br />
Rhinoplasty surgeons will help you pick your nose if you’re patient with them.<br />
Homeownership is the<br />
American Dream<br />
List/Sell • Buyer Agency • Design-Build • Turn-Key Package<br />
(No Construction Loan Needed in Most Cases)<br />
Stop in for<br />
Happy hour!<br />
Weekdays 4-6pm<br />
$2 off draft beer<br />
$1 off bottles & cans<br />
$5 mixed drinks*<br />
Closed mondays<br />
memorial day through Labor Day<br />
Scan here to check out our catering options.<br />
120 Center St, Auburn | 207-241-0033<br />
Call today to find out how<br />
we can make your dream<br />
Jon<br />
Mercier<br />
Dustin<br />
Mallar<br />
*Well Drinks- Restrictions Apply<br />
Hours - Monday-Saturday 11am - 8pm<br />
Sunday 11am - 4pm<br />
come true!<br />
Mark<br />
Turner<br />
Lindsay<br />
Wright<br />
In a packed elevator, everyone is silent.<br />
My stomach: I will now demonstrate the mating call of a whale!<br />
Deb<br />
Morin<br />
Mason<br />
Dupuis<br />
368 Minot Avenue, Auburn • 207.333.6001 • mainesourcehomes.com<br />
Linda<br />
Dupuis<br />
Malayka<br />
Harriman
A man who took an airline company to court after his luggage went<br />
missing has lost his case!<br />
KLJ Excavation<br />
& Construction<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Great<br />
fund raiser for<br />
first responders!<br />
Howie Gooldrup &<br />
Bob Raymond<br />
Kirk Waterman Logging<br />
• Fully insured<br />
• Full Site work :<br />
from clearing<br />
to completion<br />
Mark Hartford<br />
Kirkwaterman@ymail.com | 207-890-8713<br />
110 Proctor Heights Dr. Waterford ME 04088<br />
Me at 13: I don’t understand why old people are so cranky.<br />
Me at 43: Oh!<br />
Don Nazaroff<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 9
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
I hate hotel bath towels! They’re so thick and fluffy I can’t even close my suitcase.<br />
There’s FUN no in<br />
better SUN<br />
place<br />
the<br />
in LA to experience<br />
There’s Summer no better place in<br />
than<br />
LA to experience Summer<br />
than Pat’s Pat’s Deck!<br />
Deck!<br />
Scan to<br />
check out<br />
our menu<br />
85 Center Street<br />
207-784-8221<br />
85 Center Street, Auburn | 207-784-8221 | 11a-9p<br />
Open<br />
daily<br />
11-9p Daily<br />
Coleman Watson<br />
I’m<br />
already thinking<br />
about next year’s<br />
benefit!<br />
Muriel celebrated...<br />
her 90th birthday with us<br />
and can't wait for the next party!<br />
The Meadows<br />
Happy 4th<br />
of <strong>July</strong>!<br />
“Maine’s Most Affordable Senior Living Center”<br />
A warm home-style assisted living center for self-sufficient seniors!<br />
We have availability starting at $1500 per month<br />
#433 RT. 202, P.O. BOX 629, GREENE • 946-3007<br />
Billy Bedard<br />
Jake Robitaille<br />
& Mike Anderson<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
10 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Check out our in-store weekly ad for our <strong>2024</strong> specials!<br />
Roy’s<br />
FOODLAND<br />
SATURDAY<br />
Beans, bread/rolls &<br />
cole slaw<br />
$11.99<br />
WEDNESDAY<br />
Ham, Veggie, Salami,<br />
or Pepperoni Italians<br />
$3.49<br />
PIZZA PACKS<br />
Pizza<br />
Packs<br />
$12.99<br />
Visit us for your<br />
BBQ needs!<br />
70 Broad Street, Auburn • 207-783-8471<br />
www.ShopAtRoysFoodland.com<br />
Mon.-Thurs. 8am-6pm • Fri. 8am-7pm • Sat. 8am-6pm • Sun. Closed<br />
What do you call 100 ballerinas all in a line?<br />
A TuTu Train<br />
Best Chicken &<br />
Ham Salad<br />
IN THE WORLD!<br />
Try our hamburger,<br />
it’s the best!<br />
Beanie Babies<br />
on Sale Here!
Butt dialing was a lot harder with rotary phones.<br />
Ender<br />
Submitted by Stephanie<br />
Arsenault<br />
Back in medieval times<br />
there lived a knight.<br />
Big, brave was he! He<br />
was so confident he<br />
could single-handedly<br />
defeat any enemy and<br />
end whatever uprising<br />
befell the king.<br />
He decided his last<br />
name should be Ender.<br />
So anytime he rode up<br />
on his gallant steed,<br />
and his formidable<br />
foes would shout, “Behold,<br />
who thoust goeth<br />
there?” He would reply,<br />
with total sured confidence,<br />
“I, Sir Ender!”<br />
Artwork<br />
Submitted by Stephanie<br />
Arsenault<br />
A kindergarten teacher<br />
was observing her<br />
classroom of children<br />
while they drew. She<br />
would occasionally<br />
walk around to see<br />
each child’s artwork.<br />
As she got to one little<br />
girl who was working<br />
diligently, she asked<br />
what the drawing was.<br />
The girl replied: “I’m<br />
drawing God.”<br />
The teacher paused<br />
and said: “But no one<br />
knows what God looks<br />
like.”<br />
Without missing a beat<br />
or looking up from<br />
her drawing the girl<br />
replied: “They will in a<br />
minute.”<br />
Where do you learn to make ice cream? At Sundae School.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 11
Thirsty<br />
Submitted by Stephanie<br />
Arsenault<br />
A guy was walking<br />
through the Sahara desert,<br />
desperate for water,<br />
when he saw something<br />
far off in the distance.<br />
Hoping to find water,<br />
he walked towards the<br />
image, only to find a little<br />
old man sitting at a card<br />
table with a bunch of<br />
neckties laid out on it.<br />
The guy asked, "Please,<br />
I'm dying of thirst, can I<br />
have some water?"<br />
“Write it down,” he said, “and I think you’ll figure it out.” So I wrote it down: “ID10T”<br />
And I really used to like Eric, damn kid!<br />
Providing a warm & comfortable<br />
home for our residents.<br />
The old man replied, "I<br />
don't have any water,<br />
but why don't you buy a<br />
tie? Here's one that goes<br />
nicely with your shirt."<br />
The guy shouted, "I don't<br />
want a tie, you idiot! I<br />
need water!"<br />
"OK, don't buy a tie. But<br />
to show you what a nice<br />
guy I am, I'll tell you that<br />
over that dune there,<br />
about five miles down,<br />
there is a nice restaurant<br />
my brother runs. Go<br />
over that way, they'll give<br />
you all the water you<br />
want."<br />
The guy thanked him<br />
and walked away<br />
towards the dune and<br />
eventually disappeared.<br />
Three hours later the<br />
guy came crawling back<br />
to where the old man<br />
was sitting behind his<br />
card table. The old man<br />
said, "I told you, about<br />
five miles over that<br />
dune. Couldn't you find<br />
it?"<br />
The guy rasped, "I found<br />
it. They wouldn't let me<br />
in without a tie.”<br />
The Chapman House<br />
Home for senior ladies<br />
The Chapman House wishes the<br />
community a happy 4th of <strong>July</strong>!<br />
The Chapman House has private rooms available for<br />
residents, aged 65 and older, who need assistance<br />
with bathing, medications, and meals.<br />
Call Bonnie to arrange a tour.<br />
41 Pleasant Street, Auburn | 207-783-0961<br />
Bonnie Iwans<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
12 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Did you hear about the guy who ate six cans of alphabet soup?<br />
He had the biggest vowel movement ever.
People say I’m a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.<br />
LIVE MUSIC<br />
EVERY WEDNESDAY<br />
7-9pm In Our Lounge<br />
7/3 - MURLYN GREENLEAF<br />
(Back by popular Demand)<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Happy 4th of <strong>July</strong>!<br />
LA’s One & Only True Hibachi Experience!<br />
40 East Avenue, Lewiston | www.sea40me.com | 207-795-6888<br />
7/10 - Vanessa Jones<br />
& Jerry Adams<br />
7/17 - Jay Larkin<br />
7/24 - Mike Preston<br />
7/31 - Kerry O’Leary<br />
John Worden<br />
Mark Schelling<br />
What<br />
do you mean;<br />
two putts & done?<br />
RoySnow.com<br />
207.782.3734<br />
Serving Maine since 1947<br />
11 Library Ave.<br />
Auburn<br />
Family Owned & operated<br />
Enjoy Your Summer Activites!<br />
Josh Simard<br />
Firearms, Fishing, and Camping<br />
Happy 4th of <strong>July</strong><br />
186 Sabattus Road, Sabattus, ME | 207.375.6253 | 2 Miles Off I-95 Exit 86<br />
Derek Schelling<br />
Why do teenage girls travel in odd numbered groups? Because they just can’t even.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 13
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
I just love<br />
when the beer cart<br />
shows up!<br />
I’ve joined a support group for people who talk too much. It’s called on and on anon.<br />
Residential Friendly Dumpsters<br />
Rent a<br />
dumpster<br />
for Spring<br />
cleanup!<br />
Bin Sizes:<br />
6 yd. bin- 10’ long x 5.5’ wide - 3’ high<br />
10 yd. bin - 10’ long x 7’ wide - 4’ high<br />
14 yd. bin - 11’ long x 8 wide - 4.5’ high<br />
20 yd. bin - 11’ long x 8’ wide - 6’ high<br />
Dispatch<br />
Office: 207-224-0337<br />
Cell: 207-212-0736<br />
170 N. Daggett Hill Rd.<br />
Greene, ME 04236<br />
portlandme@bintheredumpthat.com<br />
Our Residential Friendly Design Includes<br />
Easy Load Double Rear Doors<br />
Driveway Protection Boards<br />
Dependable Friendly Service<br />
207-224-0337<br />
www.bintheredumpthatusa.com<br />
Matt Dailey<br />
We are<br />
looking<br />
for new<br />
crew<br />
mates!<br />
Servers, Bartenders,<br />
Kitchen positions<br />
available<br />
Excellent<br />
pay for<br />
skilled<br />
mates!<br />
Relax and let us handle the stress<br />
Book your reservations today - let us clean up the mess!<br />
The Village Inn<br />
207-782-7796 | 165 High Street, Auburn | villageinnmaine.com | Open Wednesday - Sunday<br />
Dave Madore<br />
We do Septics!<br />
Commercial, Residential<br />
excavation, & Site work<br />
Now scheduling for<br />
Summer & Fall <strong>2024</strong><br />
Travis Barnes &<br />
Dennis Matthews<br />
shawn@hirdcontracting.com 207.754.2343<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
14 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
I entered a crowbar contest and got first prys.
My wife just threw a bottle of omega-3 capsules at me and hit me right in the head.<br />
THE AMERICAN LEGION<br />
FAMILY<br />
RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on Fridays<br />
and get a surprise!<br />
“SEE YOU AT THE POST!”<br />
Members & Guests Welcome!<br />
AMERICAN LEGION ACT<br />
Veterans who were honorably discharged<br />
but whose service did not fall into previously<br />
defined war eras may now join<br />
the American Legion immediately. The<br />
eligibility now spans from Dec. 7, 1941,<br />
until a time when the U.S. is no longer at<br />
war, as determined by Congress.<br />
RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on<br />
Fridays and get a surprise! “SEE YOU AT THE POST!”<br />
For Veteran or Community services, call<br />
207-782-1118 or 207-873-3229<br />
Hall Rentals Available<br />
Call for more<br />
information<br />
207-782-1118<br />
71 South Main St, Auburn • 207-782-1118<br />
HOURS: Monday - Wednesday: 12pm-8pm • Thursday 12pm-9pm<br />
Friday: 12pm-11pm • Saturday: 12pm-9pm • Sunday: 11am-6pm<br />
MUSIC, KARAOKE & DANCE w/ JEAN LOUIS<br />
FRIDAYS 7-11pm in <strong>July</strong><br />
Jerry Joe - June 12th, 26th • 4:30 - 6:30pm<br />
SUNDAYS<br />
Bloody Marys with Kevin<br />
HAPPY 4TH OF JULY<br />
STARTING JUNE <strong>2024</strong><br />
Membership dues will increase to $52 for<br />
<strong>2024</strong>-2025 - Due to national increase.<br />
NO SONS MEETING UNTIL SEPTEMBER<br />
MONTHLY MEETING WEDNESDAY, JULY 17 TH , <strong>2024</strong><br />
EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE 6PM GENERAL MEMBERSHIP 7PM<br />
Legion Members attending have a chance to win $100, $50, or $25<br />
I only have super fish oil injuries, but I'm lucky I wasn't krilled!<br />
A Real Eye<br />
Catcher<br />
Submitted by Stephanie<br />
Arsenault<br />
At a hotel restaurant, a<br />
man sees an attractive<br />
woman sitting alone at<br />
the next table.<br />
Suddenly, she sneezes,<br />
and a glass eye<br />
comes flying out of<br />
her eye socket. It hurls<br />
by the man, and he<br />
snatches it from the<br />
air and hands it back<br />
to her.<br />
"This is so embarrassing,"<br />
the woman says,<br />
and she pops her eye<br />
back in place. "I'm<br />
sorry to have disturbed<br />
you. Let me buy dinner<br />
to make it up to you.<br />
May I join you?" He<br />
nods.<br />
The woman is a stimulating<br />
conversationalist,<br />
stunningly pretty,<br />
and the man finds they<br />
have a lot in common.<br />
He gets her phone<br />
number and asks, "You<br />
are the most charming<br />
woman I've ever<br />
encountered. Are you<br />
this nice to every guy<br />
you meet?"<br />
"No," she replies. "You<br />
just happened to catch<br />
my eye.”<br />
I tried watching a beaver documentary.<br />
The stream kept stopping.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 15
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Jay Brown<br />
& Pat LaPlante<br />
Did you hear about the semi-colon that broke the law? He was given<br />
two consecutive sentences.<br />
ALL<br />
STEAK<br />
HAMBURGERS<br />
& GOLF CENTER<br />
Come play our newly renovated 18-hole mini golf course!<br />
BIRTHDAY PARTIES & CORPORATE EVENTS AVAILABLE<br />
RoysGolf.com<br />
Famous Burgers • Hand-cut Fries • Lobster Rolls<br />
•Ice Cream & More!<br />
2514 TURNER RD. AUBURN<br />
OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK 11AM - 8PM<br />
MINI GOLF | DRIVING RANGE | BATTING CAGES | DISC GOLF<br />
Don Poulin<br />
& Mike LaPlante<br />
Dan Pontbriand<br />
& Linda Gross<br />
Mark & Eddie<br />
Pontbriand<br />
47 Broad Street, Auburn<br />
www.firehouseauburn.com<br />
207-376-4959<br />
Monday - Saturday 11a-9p<br />
JUly Special!<br />
You’ll Love<br />
our Daily<br />
Specials!<br />
$ 8<br />
BOMB pop<br />
BURGER MONDAY Get $2 off your burgers! (dine-in only) • WHISKEY WEDNESDAY $1 off whiskey<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
16 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
My wife complains that I wake up making puns. I can't help it. They dawn on me.
What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?<br />
Tequila Mockingbird.<br />
For any disaster,<br />
call ServiceMaster!<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
DON’T KNOW<br />
WHAT TO DO<br />
NEXT? WE DO. ®<br />
WATER FIRE MOLD<br />
29 Brickyard Circle,<br />
Auburn<br />
(800) 244-7630<br />
(207) 539-4452 www.smfireandwater.com • www.smcarpetcleaning.com<br />
Sue Lajoie<br />
& Diana Pontbriand<br />
This<br />
is the perfect<br />
day for golf<br />
& Bev Ridge!<br />
Accordion to a recent survey, replacing certain words with those of musical instruments,<br />
often goes unnoticed.<br />
Summer Special on Oil<br />
& Gas boiler cleanings<br />
Get Your Yearly<br />
Boiler Cleaning<br />
and Servicing<br />
DON’T WAIT!<br />
Karen “Bev Ridge”<br />
Nichols & Renee<br />
Lachapelle<br />
Cleanings Only $255.00<br />
*Plus materials if needed<br />
Give Us A Call today! 207-754-4556<br />
Roxanne Dionne<br />
What did the buffalo say to his son who was leaving for college? Bison.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 17
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
My wife asked, “have you seen the dog bowl?"<br />
I said, “I didn’t know he could do that."<br />
JOIN A TEAM THAT VALUES ITS MEMBERS!<br />
Scan here to<br />
Apply Today!<br />
www.debloiselectric.com<br />
Rene Thibeault &<br />
Matt Ferrante<br />
Immediate openings for<br />
experienced licensed electricians<br />
What<br />
a great day!<br />
Can’t wait until<br />
next year.<br />
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere.<br />
Come watch<br />
the game<br />
with us!<br />
Open Daily<br />
11am-9pm<br />
MONDAY<br />
TUESDAY<br />
WEDNESDAY<br />
THURSDAY<br />
Jame Lovejoy<br />
Cranberry<br />
Walnut Chicken<br />
Salad Wrap<br />
with potato chips<br />
$ 9.99<br />
Italian Meat<br />
Hoagie<br />
with potato chips<br />
$ 11.99<br />
BBQ Pulled<br />
Pork Sandwich<br />
with potato chips<br />
$ 11.99<br />
Nutty<br />
Mandarin Spinach<br />
Chicken Salad<br />
with garlic toast<br />
$ 14.99<br />
Dine-In<br />
or<br />
Take-out<br />
FRIDAY<br />
Lobster Sub<br />
with two sides<br />
$ 22.99<br />
SATURDAY<br />
BBQ Baby Back<br />
Ribs with fries &<br />
garlic toast<br />
half $ 14.99<br />
full $ 22.99<br />
SUNDAY<br />
Fried Shrimp<br />
Dinner<br />
with fries &<br />
coleslaw<br />
$ 11.99<br />
Daily<br />
Drink<br />
Specials<br />
Daryl Lovejoy<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
18 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
1567 Lisbon St. Lewiston | 207.777.6353 | gridironrestaurant.com<br />
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?<br />
Aye matey.
Teacher: “Where is your homework?"<br />
Student: “I lost it fighting some kid who said you weren't the best teacher in school."<br />
Heather Pierson Trio<br />
in concert!<br />
Saturday, <strong>July</strong> 13<br />
ESCAPE ROOM $10 per person<br />
Reserve your group’s adventure at this<br />
link: https://bookeo.com/francocenter<br />
Line Dancing<br />
includes instruction<br />
most Wednesdays at 10 a.m.<br />
<strong>July</strong> 3, 10, 17, 24, 31<br />
Great Exercise!<br />
$5 per person<br />
No need to register!<br />
Walk-ins welcome!<br />
Tickets<br />
on sale<br />
now!<br />
Tickets $20 advance/<br />
$25 door day of show<br />
Doors & cash bar open 6 p.m. • Show starts 7 p.m.<br />
The band: Heather Pierson, Shawn Nadeau and Craig<br />
Bryan are excited to perform in Lewiston just weeks<br />
ahead of their soon-to-be-released new album!<br />
FRANCO CENTER<br />
Performing Arts & Events<br />
CATERING<br />
46 Cedar Street<br />
Lewiston 04240<br />
Parlez Vous? French<br />
Conversation Meet-ups<br />
Thursdays WWW.FRANCOCENTER.ORG at • 207-333-3251 10:30 a.m.<br />
<strong>July</strong> 11 and 25<br />
FREE and open to all! If you speak<br />
French, you’ll enjoy this meet-up.<br />
No need to pre-register.<br />
46 Cedar St., Lewiston<br />
207-689-2000<br />
www.francocenter.org<br />
broadway Three Buds<br />
will kick off our 25th season! Sept. 6 and 7<br />
Get your tickets today! Interested in being a sponsor?<br />
Best of<br />
Thank you to our show sponsors: DaVinci’s; Emerson Chevrolet; and Platz Associates<br />
Rent our building!<br />
Call 207-333-3251<br />
Two stages • Versatile space<br />
• Full bar • Historic building<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Glenn Therrien,<br />
Todd Hartford,<br />
& Ray Masse<br />
Submitted by Stephanie<br />
Arsenault<br />
Three buddies die in<br />
a car crash and they<br />
go to heaven for an<br />
orientation.<br />
They are all asked,<br />
“When you are in your<br />
casket and friends and<br />
family are mourning<br />
you, what would you<br />
like to hear them say<br />
about you?<br />
The first guy says, “I<br />
would like to hear them<br />
say that I was a great<br />
doctor and a great<br />
family man.”<br />
The Envelope Challenge for Businesses is an<br />
electronic version of the popular paper envelope<br />
fundraiser where 400 envelopes are available<br />
for “sale” on a secure website. Each envelope is<br />
worth its face value. With each donation, you<br />
have a chance to win any of our gift prizes. Visit<br />
www.francocenter.org for more information.<br />
The second guy says,<br />
“I would like to hear<br />
that I was a wonderful<br />
husband and school<br />
teacher which made a<br />
huge difference in our<br />
children of tomorrow.”<br />
The last guy replies,<br />
“I would like to hear<br />
them say, “Look! He’s<br />
moving!<br />
Anyone else ever notice that a restaurant called Popeyes doesn't serve spinach?<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 19
Out and About<br />
Ribbon Cutting<br />
At Dirigo Federal<br />
Credit Union<br />
Some clown opened the door for me. I thought “What a lovely jester!”<br />
Summer is a great time<br />
to slow down and relax.<br />
Amanda Martin<br />
Teller<br />
Gift certificates available!<br />
207-539-5128 | Oxford, Maine | Open 7 days a week | essencewellnessspa.com<br />
Coverage for<br />
Every Day<br />
Discover insurance solutions from local industry experts<br />
dedicated to protecting your assets. From risk consulting<br />
to claims support, we help you protect what matters most.<br />
Connie Sessions<br />
John Blanchette, Sales Advisor | 207.784.9358<br />
john.blanchette@nfp.com<br />
For your business.<br />
For your people.<br />
For your life.<br />
NFP.com<br />
681 Sabattus St., Lewiston, ME 04240<br />
Copyright ©<strong>2024</strong> NFP. All Rights Reserved.<br />
Corrie Bernatchez<br />
Top It<br />
Stephanie Arsenault<br />
& Marcello<br />
Marciuliano<br />
DIRIGO FCU<br />
Marketing Manager<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
20 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Poland Spring Golf Course<br />
& Mel’s Hilltop Restaurant<br />
Designed by Donald Ross, the golf course is an<br />
18-hole, par 71, championship layout. Enjoy velvet<br />
bent grass greens, well maintained fairways, and<br />
tees for all abilities. We also have a driving range,<br />
practice putting green, and golf school.<br />
Come enjoy the scenery and the great food at<br />
Mel’s Hilltop Restaurant before or after your<br />
round, or just to have fun!<br />
Call the Pro Shop at (207) 998-6002 for tee<br />
times and more information.<br />
www.PolandSpringResort.com<br />
I don’t always go the extra mile, but when I do, it’s because I missed my exit.
What do you call a flying monk? An air friar!<br />
THE GAHS GOLDEN<br />
PAW AWARDS<br />
Awards<br />
Silent Auction<br />
Comedy<br />
Dinner & Drinks<br />
Special<br />
Guest Performance<br />
by Julia Gagnon!<br />
Thursday September 12th, <strong>2024</strong><br />
5:00pm - 9:00pm<br />
Royal Oak Room, Lewiston<br />
Get Your<br />
Tickets Today<br />
THE GAHS<br />
GOLDEN PAW AWARDS<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Awards Silent Auction Comedy Dinner & Drinks<br />
Thursday, September 12th, <strong>2024</strong><br />
5:00pm- 9:00pm<br />
Dinner buffet by<br />
Royal Oak Room, Lewiston<br />
Grazi To Go!<br />
The Greater Androscoggin Humane Society | www. gahumane.org/goldenpawawards<br />
Photobooth<br />
and fun!<br />
Get Your Tickets Today to Benefit<br />
the Greater Androscoggin Humane Society<br />
www.gahumane.org/goldenpawawards<br />
Adam Asselin<br />
& Angela Ray<br />
Bowling alleys might be noisy but you can still hear a pin drop.<br />
150 East Ave. Lewiston<br />
207-783-2246 | 888-983-2246<br />
THE CHAMPOUX GROUP<br />
CHAMPOUX • PEOPLES • PINKHAM • ROGERS<br />
I N S U R A N C E<br />
...Your Security is Our Concern!<br />
Locally Owned & Operated<br />
Lewiston Str ng<br />
Happy 4th of <strong>July</strong>!<br />
HOME, AUTO,<br />
BUSINESS,<br />
& MORE<br />
Gary Bennett, Calvin<br />
& Grayson Bowie<br />
Dan Roderick<br />
& Pete Nadeau<br />
Visit our new location at: 243 Mount Auburn Ave., Suite C, Auburn<br />
I'm telling everyone about the benefits of dried fruit.<br />
It's all about raisin awareness.<br />
Mark & Lisa Laliberte<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 21
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Meme, I<br />
thought you could<br />
play!<br />
Live Music<br />
Every Sunday<br />
Our Famous<br />
Sunday Blues Jam 1-5pm<br />
Ireland's capital has the world's fastest growing population.<br />
Every day it's Dublin.<br />
61 Portland Rd. •<br />
207-657-7973<br />
•<br />
Gray, Maine<br />
OPEN 7 DAYS<br />
A WEEK!<br />
TWO Pool Tables,<br />
Buck Hunter<br />
& Golden Tee Golf<br />
Hours: Mon-Fri: 3pm-Close | Sat: 1pm-1am or close | Sun: 1-5pm • TailgateBarAndGrill.biz<br />
BENEFITING<br />
Cathy Simard &<br />
Owen Bowie<br />
Janet Perreault<br />
Mike Perreault<br />
BENEFITING<br />
FUN & Games - Treehouse Tours - Slugger The Sea Dog<br />
For More Information and Tickets<br />
www.WishesintheMeadow.org<br />
& Maintenance<br />
301 301 River River Rd Rd Buxton, Maine Maine 04093 04093<br />
2 Live 2 Live Bands - - Northeast Gumbo & Hello & Hello Newman<br />
Hosted Hosted by Samantha by Samantha York York from from News News Center Center Maine Maine<br />
This This the is the magical magical part part of the of the day. day. It’s about It’s about making making a a<br />
difference. Bringing Bringing a ray a ray of hope of hope into into the the lives lives of of<br />
children children battling battling critical critical illnesses. illnesses.<br />
FUN FUN & Games & Games - Treehouse - Treehouse Tours Tours - Slugger - Slugger The Sea The Dog Sea Dog<br />
For For More More information information and and Tickets Tickets<br />
www.WishesintheMeadow.org<br />
www.Facebook.com/sacorivermeadows<br />
www.Facebook.com/sacorivermeadows<br />
301 River Rd Buxton, Maine 04093<br />
Come enjoy the music and contribute to the noble cause of Make-A-Wish® Maine!<br />
2 Live Bands - Northeast Gumbo & Hello Newman<br />
Join Us for Wish Hour<br />
Hosted by Samantha York from News Center Maine<br />
This is the magical part of the day. It’s about making a<br />
difference. Bringing a ray of hope into the lives of<br />
children battling critical illnesses.<br />
FUN & Games - Treehouse Tours - Slugger The Sea Dog<br />
For More information and Tickets<br />
www.WishesintheMeadow.org<br />
www.Facebook.com/sacorivermeadows<br />
Come enjoy the music and contribute to the noble cause of Make-A-Wish ® Maine!<br />
2 Live Bands - Northeast Gumbo<br />
Join Join Us Us for for Wish Wish Hour Hour<br />
& Hello Newman<br />
Come enjoy the music and contribute to the noble cause of Make-A-Wish ® Maine!<br />
Come enjoy the music and contribute to the noble cause of Make-A-Wish ® Maine!<br />
Helping keep your<br />
home healthy<br />
BENEFITING<br />
Home Tune-up Packages Available!<br />
301 River Rd B<br />
We clean throughout homes<br />
Utility room, kitchen, bathrooms, 2 Live laundry, Bands - Northea<br />
garages, inside & outside your home.<br />
Join<br />
Drain cleanings to garage door sensors.<br />
Call us for a quote today!<br />
This is the magic<br />
207-619-0868 difference. Bring<br />
children battling<br />
Hosted by Sam<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
22 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Junk: something you keep for years, then throw away two weeks before you FUN need & it. Games - Treehou<br />
For More infor<br />
www.Wishesi
It’s ok if you don’t know what a prefix is… It’s not the end of the word.<br />
New LA Metro<br />
Chamber Member<br />
GROWING<br />
MAINE’S<br />
WORKFORCE<br />
MANUFACTURING<br />
TECHNICIAN TRAINING<br />
FREE Training for Maine<br />
Residents<br />
$500 Weekly Stipend<br />
Workforce & Professional Development • Lapoint 107<br />
workforcedevelopment@cmcc.edu • (207) 755 - 5280<br />
Central Maine Community College does not discriminate and is an equal opportunity/affirmative action employer.<br />
For more information, please call 207-755-5396 or email humanresources@cmcc.edu.<br />
3 Week Course<br />
40 Hrs/Wk<br />
Job Interview with<br />
General Dynamics for<br />
Qualified Applicants<br />
Upon Successful Completion of the Course<br />
CMCC.EDU/WORKFORCE<br />
Cucumbers stuffed into a jar often find themselves in a pickle.<br />
Home At Last<br />
With Michelle<br />
Michelle grew up in<br />
Oakland, ME and moved<br />
to the L/A community in<br />
1996. Her dedication to<br />
client success led her<br />
to create her own real<br />
estate team - Home At<br />
Last. When Michelle isn’t<br />
helping clients reach their<br />
real estate goals, she<br />
enjoys time relaxing by<br />
the water, spending time<br />
with loved ones, attending<br />
community events &<br />
traveling.<br />
In 2019, Michelle became<br />
a licensed realtor and<br />
now holds an Associate<br />
Broker’s license. Her<br />
background in fundraising,<br />
sales & marketing<br />
have helped build a<br />
strong foundation for her<br />
forever career in real estate!<br />
Michelle is passionate<br />
about assisting people<br />
through every stage<br />
of their life. She is well<br />
known for home staging<br />
& having a vehicle filled<br />
with home décor, cleaning<br />
products, toolbox &<br />
repair kits to make listing<br />
your property a breeze!<br />
Whether you are a new<br />
buyer, someone looking<br />
for a second home or investment<br />
property in our<br />
state, Michelle is happy<br />
to guide you every step<br />
of the way.<br />
Cell Phone- 207-754-4998<br />
Office Phone- 800-971-8860<br />
229 Center St. Suite 9 Auburn<br />
MEREALESTATECO.COM<br />
Engineers have made a car that runs on mint.<br />
They are now working on a bus that runs on thyme.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 23
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Be kind to everyone you meet. You do not know their battles. They might<br />
have a teenager at home.<br />
Presented By<br />
Auction:<br />
9/25/24 | 6pm<br />
Markie Carey<br />
& Donald Forbs<br />
Bill Murphy<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
24 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Auction: <strong>2024</strong> GOLF September FORE KIDS’ 25, <strong>2024</strong> SAKE 6 REGISTRATION<br />
pm<br />
Business Name: ______________________________________<br />
Tournament: September 26, <strong>2024</strong> 8 am<br />
Contact Name: _______________________________________<br />
Poland Springs Resort Golf Club<br />
Email:_________________________Phone:________________<br />
Poland Springs, ME<br />
Presented By<br />
<strong>2024</strong> GOLF FORE KIDS’ SAKE REGISTRATION<br />
Business Name: ____________________________<br />
Jack Trull<br />
Tournament:<br />
9/26/24 | 8:30am<br />
Contact Name: ____________________________<br />
Email: ___________________________________<br />
For more Information or to register:<br />
Phone: __________________________________<br />
Mike LaPlante<br />
& Amy St. Hiliare<br />
Address:____________________________________________<br />
City:_____________________ST_________Zip_____________<br />
FOURSOME INFORMATION<br />
Poland Spring<br />
Golf Course<br />
Player 1: __________________________________HCP:______<br />
Player 2: __________________________________HCP:______<br />
Player 3: __________________________________HCP:______<br />
Player 4: __________________________________HCP:______<br />
GOLF WITH US TO SUPPORT MAINE<br />
CHILDREN FACING ADVERSITY!<br />
FOURSOME Only - $ 800 | includes all challenges<br />
66 Elm St. Ste. 100, Camden, ME 04843<br />
207.860.0356 | fax: 207.236.2292 | rebeccakurtz@bbbsmidmaine.org<br />
Address: _________________________________<br />
So apparently...I'm the reason I'm broke...I'm shocked and confused.<br />
City: _________________ ST _____ ZIP ________<br />
Jo<br />
SP<br />
PRES<br />
Includ<br />
signa<br />
recog<br />
MAJ<br />
Includ<br />
signa
I hate people who call you at past 9pm and ask if you’re asleep.<br />
No I’m outside having a raccoon tea party.<br />
120 Center Street Auburn<br />
Sunday - Wednesday 11am to 10pm<br />
Thursday - Saturday 11am to 11pm<br />
Check out our NEW website!<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Calling All<br />
Photographers!<br />
Studio Rental<br />
Hourly<br />
& Daily<br />
Rates!<br />
www.gippers.com<br />
207.786.0715<br />
Call Now<br />
To Check<br />
Availability<br />
207.783.7039<br />
2 Great Falls Plaza Ste. 1B, Auburn | LAMetroMagazine.com<br />
Eligible for Medicare?<br />
CALL US TODAY<br />
to see which Medicare health plan best fits your needs.<br />
Andrew Johnston<br />
& John Brennan<br />
Troy Barnes<br />
& Matt Wiers<br />
The<br />
IAAI knows<br />
how to run a class<br />
tournament!<br />
Dave Pontbri<br />
& Bob Breau<br />
30+<br />
Years of<br />
Experience!<br />
Visit us at 184 Webster Street, Lewiston<br />
Fred<br />
& Frank DeRocher<br />
My hobbies include eating and also thinking about the next time I will be eating.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 25
CALL THE PROS<br />
Specializing in<br />
Heat Pumps/AC,<br />
Oil & Gas Furnace<br />
Ask us about<br />
our <strong>July</strong> Special<br />
for servicing<br />
your AC unit!<br />
Get A Free Quote!<br />
Ryan Queen • hvacsolutions207@gmail.com<br />
FINE LINE GUNS<br />
COME SEE US FOR ALL YOUR FIREARM AND SUPPLIES NEEDS<br />
BERETTA 21 BOBCAT INOX<br />
Caliber: .22 LR<br />
Action: DA/SA<br />
Capacity: 7+1<br />
Frame Material: Aluminum<br />
Overall Height: 3.7"<br />
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207.998.2374|590 Plains Rd., Poland|finelinegun@aol.com<br />
Accounting<br />
& Tax<br />
Service You<br />
Can Trust!<br />
MICHAEL G. SPAULDING, P.A.<br />
Certified Public Accountant<br />
Tax Planning & Preparation<br />
for Individuals and Business<br />
P.O. Box 895 | 207.782.1040<br />
2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B | Auburn, ME 04212<br />
Office & Light Industrial Cleaning Services<br />
Mike Magretto 207-530-8890<br />
Veteran Owned & Operated<br />
EmeraldJanitorialServices.com<br />
Watch our Facebook page for new<br />
location and hours coming soon<br />
SUMMER<br />
IS MADE FOR<br />
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designed to help.<br />
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personalized treatment!<br />
(207)-402-8654<br />
|www.lamassagemaine.com<br />
Add 4 Months to Your<br />
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with a Wetsuit!<br />
We can help you stay warmer longer!<br />
• Swimming • Snorkeling • Scuba • Water-ski<br />
805 Main Street, Lewiston 784-7300<br />
Lincoln Street<br />
RADIATOR SHOP<br />
Family owned & operated since 1967<br />
WARM WEATHER IS HERE!<br />
Is your vehicle cooling system ready?<br />
Give us a call and our pros can make<br />
sure you’re prepared!<br />
Happy<br />
4th of<br />
<strong>July</strong>!<br />
207-784-9356 | 1522 Lisbon Street, Lewiston<br />
Stephanie<br />
Asselin<br />
Marketing Specialist<br />
207.458.8574<br />
stephanie@LydiaMediaLLC.com<br />
Proud Publisher of<br />
TWO local magazines!<br />
2 Great Falls Plaza Suite 1B, Auburn<br />
207.783.7039 | LAMetroMagazine.com | <strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
26 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
My daughter asked if I could buy her a Coach Bag for her birthday.<br />
I asked her what she was coaching!
CALL THE PROS<br />
We Make You Look Great.<br />
Posters • Booklets • Carbonless forms • Envelopes • Business Cards & More!<br />
EVERGREEN<br />
CUSTOM PRINTING, INC.<br />
782-0525<br />
2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B, Auburn | Info@evergreencustomprinting.com<br />
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Professional<br />
Cleaning Service<br />
Residential<br />
Commercial<br />
Windows<br />
Floors<br />
207-712-2765 realcleanllc.com Serving Maine<br />
Coach Terry’s<br />
REDEMPTION<br />
CENTER<br />
The friendly redemption center<br />
Happy 4th<br />
of <strong>July</strong>!<br />
225-2008 | Tidswell Road, Turner | Open daily 8am-4pm<br />
Offers Cranio<br />
Sacral Therapy<br />
Helps manage symptoms like:<br />
• Chronic Pain<br />
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207.240.6415 | www.memassagetherapy.com<br />
RON’S<br />
TRANSMISSION REPAIR SERVICE<br />
YOUR FULL SERVICE<br />
REPAIR FACILITY<br />
Summer is HERE!<br />
Get ready for your next road trip<br />
Tires & State Inspections Available!<br />
515 Gardiner Rd, Wales<br />
375-4924<br />
• Post-Concussion Syndrome<br />
• Scoliosis<br />
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• Complex Regional<br />
Pain Syndrome<br />
We specialize in domestic<br />
car & truck, automatic<br />
& manual transmissions,<br />
transfer cases & differentials.<br />
Ron Charpentier Jr.<br />
Owner<br />
Want to help us distribute?<br />
Give us a call!<br />
783.7039<br />
2 great falls plaza suite 1b, Auburn<br />
An electrician comes home at 2am. His wife says, “Wire you insulate?” He said, “Watts it<br />
to you? I’m ohm aren’t I?”<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 27
I keep telling myself, “I’m not a hoarder, I’m a prepper!”<br />
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HOME SERVICES<br />
Aging Roof? New Homeowner? Got Storm Damage? You<br />
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MISCELLANEOUS<br />
Prepare for power outages today with a Generac Home<br />
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1-800-245-0398<br />
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DIRECTV Stream - Carries the most local MLB Games!<br />
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HARMLESS BAT<br />
REMOVAL<br />
BAT-PROOF<br />
& CLEAN UP<br />
FULL ATTIC<br />
RESTORATION<br />
10-YEAR WARRANTY<br />
thebatguysbatremoval.com 888-255-9950<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
28 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
My wife is a hoarder and she has tons of stupid junk! Unlike me, I have tons of good<br />
stuff; “I’m a collector.”
BUSINESS<br />
SP TLIGHT<br />
Call us<br />
for a free<br />
estimate!<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
207-782-7141<br />
207-782-7141<br />
Pizza and friends are all we need!<br />
Happy 4th of <strong>July</strong><br />
Cleanings for:<br />
Property Management<br />
Commercial/ Office<br />
Post Construction<br />
Rental Turn Over<br />
207-713-1550<br />
Let us SCOOP the poop!<br />
Scoop 4Paws<br />
Professional Pooper Scoopers<br />
Mike Hurst<br />
Call 207-713-1550 or<br />
message us on Facebook<br />
LA’s Newest Real<br />
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T H E<br />
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81 Main St. Auburn<br />
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text your<br />
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207.345.2207<br />
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Richard Moylan<br />
(207) 777-0050<br />
791 Kittyhawk Ave. Unit 5, Auburn<br />
richardmoylan@allstate.com<br />
Insurance and coverages subject to terms.<br />
qualifications and availability. Allstate Property<br />
and Casualty Insurance Company, Allstate Fire<br />
and Casualty Insurance Company: Northbrook,<br />
Illinois © 2010 Allstate Insurance Company<br />
Get The latest<br />
copy first!<br />
delivered at<br />
your door.<br />
Kirk Hall<br />
Mike Hall<br />
Subscriptions available at<br />
lametromagazine.com<br />
I never called you stupid. But when I asked you to spell ‘orange’ and you asked me,<br />
“The fruit or the color?” It kind of caught me off guard!<br />
Ron Malo<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 29
Everybody wants to change the world but nobody wants to change the empty roll of toilet paper.<br />
Poisson & Sons Auto Care<br />
260 S. Main Street, Auburn 207.782.9144<br />
FULL SERVICE GAS STATION<br />
JULY <strong>2024</strong><br />
STICKERS ARE DUE!<br />
Summer Car Care Tips:<br />
• Change your oil<br />
• Check: Tires/pressure, fluids, whiper blades,<br />
hoses & belts, AC, brakes, and Battery.<br />
MOBILE CPR & BLS TRAINING<br />
FOR ALL OF MAINE<br />
For both healthcare professionals<br />
and lay people. We come to your<br />
location for your convenience!<br />
Offering Certification<br />
and Re-certification<br />
CALL TODAY<br />
19 Roy Street Lewiston | 207-330-0322<br />
Fresh Frozen<br />
Craft Custard<br />
Premium Soft Serve<br />
CHECK OUT OUR<br />
WEBSITE FOR<br />
WEEKLY FLAVORS!<br />
THELOGYARDDAIRYBAR.COM | 1184 Maine St, Poland, ME<br />
CALL OF THE WILD RV CENTER<br />
NOW IS THE TIME TO CHECK OUT OUR INVENTORY OF <strong>2024</strong> RV’S.<br />
Jayco- High Quality Design<br />
& Award Winning Rv’s.<br />
Visit us!<br />
Experience what camping can offer!<br />
848 Main Street, Oxford • 207-539-4410 • www.callofthewildrv.com<br />
LA’S #1 STOP FOR ALL<br />
YOUR MUSIC NEEDS!<br />
Happy<br />
4th of <strong>July</strong><br />
Main Street<br />
Music Lessons<br />
WELCOMING NEW STUDENTS<br />
FOR IN PERSON LESSONS!<br />
Air Conditioning & Heating<br />
24 Hour Service<br />
Proudly serving Auburn, Lewiston,<br />
and the surrounding communities!<br />
• LESSONS • REPAIRS • SALES • RENTALS<br />
33 Dunn Street, Auburn | mainstreetmusiclessons.com | 207-376-3376<br />
235 N. River Road, Auburn<br />
207-777-5600<br />
www.pro-techrefrigeration.com | protechoffice11@yahoo.com<br />
Open Thurs.-Sun. 10a-5p<br />
Shuga Shak Country Store<br />
Now selling lobster<br />
live or cooked<br />
Serving 24 flavors of<br />
Soft Serve Ice Cream<br />
Maple Baked Beans<br />
every Saturday!<br />
Wine • Local Products<br />
Honey • Pickles • Jams<br />
Candies • Crafts...<br />
and much more!<br />
450 Pigeon Hill Road<br />
(Rte 26), Mechanic Falls<br />
207-576-7886<br />
Steve<br />
Simard<br />
Marketing Specialist<br />
207.754.1815<br />
steve@LydiaMediaLLC.com<br />
Proud Publisher of<br />
TWO local magazines!<br />
2 Great Falls Plaza Suite 1B, Auburn<br />
207.783.7039 | LAMetroMagazine.com | <strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
30 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Does anyone think surfers go to boarding school?
The number one cause of dry skin? Towels.<br />
SUBSCRIBE and SAVE!<br />
24<br />
25<br />
SEASON<br />
ThePublicTheatre.org<br />
(207) 782-3200<br />
See FOUR great shows for only $128<br />
PLUS get a FREE Bonus Ticket ($35 value)<br />
Dracula: A Comedy of Terrors<br />
by Gordon Greenberg & Steve Rose<br />
October 11-27, <strong>2024</strong> - Extended Run!<br />
Get ready for FANGtastic fun!<br />
Every Brilliant Thing<br />
by Duncan Macmillan with Jonny Donahoe<br />
January 24-Feb 2, 2025<br />
A life-affirming, unique theatrical<br />
experience.<br />
Halfway There<br />
by Norm Foster<br />
March 14-23, 2025<br />
A delightful celebration of the<br />
unshakeable bonds of female friendship.<br />
Now and Then<br />
by Sean Grennan<br />
May 2-11, 2025<br />
A humorous and emotional time-warp<br />
full of unexpected life lessons, laughter<br />
and romance.<br />
Out and About<br />
at Poland<br />
Spring Golf<br />
Course<br />
IAAI Pete Simard<br />
Golf Benefit<br />
Cordell Leeman<br />
<strong>2024</strong> <strong>Uncle</strong>Andys <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong> - v3<br />
If I’m ever known as the one that got away…It will be from an asylum.<br />
Kenny Hoyt<br />
Thanks<br />
Corey for<br />
getting me in this<br />
benefit.<br />
Corey Nugent<br />
& Kenny Fanfa<br />
Did you know that before the invention of the crowbar, crows just drank at home?<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 31
| EVENTS |<br />
JULY<br />
Mike Truchon<br />
JUly 3<br />
Murlyn Greenleaf<br />
Sea 40<br />
40 East Ave. Lewiston<br />
7-9pm<br />
207.795.6888<br />
Auburn Community<br />
Concert Band in the Park<br />
Festival Plaza in Downtown<br />
Auburn<br />
7:00-8:15pm<br />
www.auburnband.com<br />
JUly 10<br />
Auburn Community<br />
Concert Band in the Park<br />
Festival Plaza in Downtown<br />
Auburn<br />
7:00-8:15pm<br />
www.auburnband.com<br />
JUly 12<br />
Lone Pine Summer<br />
Concert Series<br />
Lost Valley Brewing<br />
200 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn<br />
www.lostvalleyski.com/brewpub-auburn-maine/<br />
Town of Turner<br />
Fireworks<br />
Ricker Hill Orchards<br />
295 Buckfield Rd. Turner<br />
5:00-10:00pm<br />
https://rickerhill.com/shop/<br />
Scott Gagne<br />
Jeff Chaput<br />
JUly 4, 5 & 6<br />
Lewiston Auburn Liberty<br />
Festival<br />
Veterans Park Lewiston and Great<br />
Falls Plaza Auburn<br />
FMI Follow Lewiston Auburn Liberty<br />
Festival on Facebook<br />
info@libertyfestival.org<br />
JUly 7<br />
Bob Marley Outdoor<br />
Comedy Show<br />
Lost Valley Brewing<br />
200 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn<br />
4:00-8:30pm<br />
bmarley.com. Lost Valley does not<br />
have or sell tickets.<br />
Do not buy tickets from any other<br />
source than Bmarley.com<br />
JUly 8<br />
Christy Ray Band in the<br />
Gazebo<br />
Poland Spring Resort<br />
640 Maine St. Poland Spring<br />
6:30pm with $5 admission<br />
207.998.4142<br />
JUly 10<br />
Vanessa Jones & Jerry<br />
Adams<br />
Sea 40<br />
40 East Ave. Lewiston<br />
7-9pm<br />
207.795.6888<br />
JUly 11<br />
Comedy Workshop<br />
6-8pm | Free<br />
Great Falls Comedy Club<br />
Tix at Greatfallscomedyclub.com<br />
JUly 12 & 14<br />
Bates Dance Festival<br />
Aretha Aoki & Ryan MacDonald<br />
IZUMONOOKUNI<br />
At Schaeffer Theatre<br />
Allie Eck at Garden Spot Farm<br />
JUly 13<br />
Live Music by Seagrass<br />
The Pub At Baxter<br />
120 Mill St. Lewiston<br />
7:00-10:00pm<br />
www.seagrassme.com<br />
Late and Alone: An<br />
Intimate Portrait of<br />
Johnny Cash<br />
The Public Theatre<br />
31 Maple St. Lewiston<br />
7:30pm<br />
www.thepublictheatre.my.salesforce-sites/ticket<br />
Great Falls Comedy Club<br />
presents Comedian Sam<br />
Miller<br />
7:30-9pm | $25<br />
Community Little Theatre<br />
25 Academy St. Auburn<br />
Tix at Greatfallscomedyclub.com<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
32 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong>
| EVENTS |<br />
Seth & Angie of LA Metro<br />
Chamber of Commerce<br />
<strong>2024</strong><br />
JUly 13<br />
Late and Alone: An<br />
Intimate Portrait of<br />
Johnny Cash<br />
The Public Theatre<br />
31 Maple St. Lewiston<br />
3:00pm<br />
www.thepublictheatre.my.salesforce-sites/ticket<br />
JUly 14<br />
Late and Alone: An<br />
Intimate Portrait of<br />
Johnny Cash<br />
The Public Theatre<br />
31 Maple St. Lewiston<br />
2:00pm<br />
www.thepublictheatre.my.salesforce-sites/ticket<br />
JUly 19 & 20<br />
Bates Dance Festival<br />
The Lost Art of Dreaming<br />
Sean Dorsey Dance<br />
At Schaeffer Theatre<br />
JUly 19 & 20<br />
Lewiston Auburn<br />
Riverfest <strong>2024</strong><br />
Simard-Payne Park<br />
34 Oxford St. Lewiston<br />
https://lametrocc.com/RF<strong>2024</strong><br />
JUly 20<br />
Comedian Nick Callas<br />
7:30-9pm | $20<br />
Great Falls Comedy Club<br />
34 Court St. Auburn<br />
Tix at Greatfallscomedyclub.com<br />
Auburn Community<br />
Concert Band in the Park<br />
Festival Plaza in Downtown Auburn<br />
7:00-8:15pm<br />
www.auburnband.com<br />
JUly 27<br />
Bates Dance Festival<br />
BDF c CR¯AV<br />
Summer Battle <strong>2024</strong> Finals &<br />
Exhibition<br />
At Alumni Gym<br />
JUly 31<br />
<strong>2024</strong> Mission Working<br />
Dogs Fundraiser<br />
Lost Valley Brewpub<br />
134 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn<br />
4:00pm<br />
www.MissionWorkingDogs.org<br />
Brian & Sue<br />
Dickinson<br />
JUly 17<br />
Jay Larkin<br />
Sea 40<br />
40 East Ave. Lewiston<br />
7-9pm<br />
207.795.6888<br />
Auburn Community<br />
Concert Band in the Park<br />
Festival Plaza in Downtown<br />
Auburn<br />
7:00-8:15pm<br />
www.auburnband.com<br />
JUly 18<br />
Michael Krapovicky Live<br />
Lost Valley Brewpub<br />
200 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn<br />
6:00-9:00pm<br />
www.lostvalleyski.com/brewpub-auburn-maine/<br />
Second Annual Squatch<br />
Open Golf Tournament<br />
All proceeds benefit All Is Welles<br />
(&Willa Too!)<br />
Martindale Country Club<br />
527 Beech Hill Rd. Auburn<br />
JUly 22<br />
Poland Spring Resort<br />
The Cobblestones in the Gazebo<br />
640 Maine St. Poland Spring<br />
6:30pm with $5 admission<br />
207.998.4142<br />
JUly 24<br />
Bates Dance Festival<br />
Musicians’ Concert<br />
At Schaeffer Theatre<br />
Mike Preston<br />
Sea 40<br />
40 East Ave. Lewiston<br />
7-9pm<br />
207.795.6888<br />
Bates Dance Festival<br />
Moving in the Moment<br />
At Alumni Gym<br />
Bates College, 2 Andrews Rd.<br />
Lewiston<br />
Auburn Community<br />
Concert Band in the Park<br />
Festival Plaza in Downtown Auburn<br />
7:00-8:15pm<br />
www.auburnband.com<br />
Kerry O’Leary<br />
Sea 40<br />
40 East Ave. Lewiston<br />
7-9pm<br />
207.795.6888<br />
Tim Rucker<br />
ADVERTISERS GET 2 FREE<br />
EVENTS TO PUT<br />
ON THE CALENDAR.<br />
NON-ADVERTISERS<br />
$25 PER EVENT.<br />
BILLING@UNCLEANDYS.COM<br />
OR CALL 207-783-7039<br />
ASK FOR STEPHANIE<br />
Send us your events for August by <strong>July</strong> 19th. Call 207.783.7039 or email billing@LydiaMediaLLC.com<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 33
Directory of Advertisers<br />
AUTOMOTIVE<br />
Armand’s Autobody..............................C<br />
www.armandsautobody.com<br />
Lincoln St Radiator............................ 26<br />
www.lincolnstreetradiator.com<br />
Poisson & Sons Auto Care................ 30<br />
207.782.9144<br />
Ron’s Transmission............................ 27<br />
207.375.4924<br />
BANKING SERVICES<br />
Community Federal Credit Union.... 15<br />
www.communitycreditunion.com<br />
Dirigo Federal Credit Union............ 27<br />
www.dirigofcu.com<br />
CONSTRUCTION & EXCAVATION<br />
Hird Contracting................................ 14<br />
207.754.2343<br />
KLJ Excavation & Construction........ 9<br />
207.890.8713<br />
DENTISTS & DENTURES<br />
Smile Again Dentures.......................... 4<br />
www.SmileAgainDentures.com<br />
DISPENSERIES<br />
207 THC.................................................C<br />
www.207THC.com<br />
MEDCo...................................................C<br />
www.thcMEDCo.com<br />
Mystique of Maine........................... BC<br />
www.mystiqueofmaine.com<br />
EDUCATION SERVICES<br />
Central Maine Community College... 23<br />
www.cmcc.edu/workforce<br />
Main Street Music Lessons.............. 30<br />
www.mainestreetmusiclessons.com<br />
Maine Mobile CPR............................ 30<br />
207.330.0322<br />
ELECTRICAL<br />
DeBlois Electric, Inc...............................<br />
18<br />
www.debloiselectric.com<br />
Roy I. Snow, Inc.................................. 13<br />
www.RoySnow.com<br />
ENTERTAINMENT<br />
Franco Center......................................19<br />
www.francocenter.org<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
34 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
Poland Spring Golf Course & Mel’s<br />
Hilltop..................................................20<br />
www.PolandSpringResort.com<br />
Sea 40 Japanese Cuisine.................... 13<br />
www.sea40me.com<br />
Tailgate Bar & Grill........................... 22<br />
www.TailgateBarAndGrill.biz<br />
FINANCIAL SERVICES<br />
Modern Woodmen of America......... 3<br />
www.modern-woodmen.org<br />
SPN Payment Systems....................... 30<br />
802.522.3381<br />
FOOD & BEVERAGE<br />
Burnt Ends Barbeque........................... 8<br />
www.burntendsmaine.com<br />
Dads Place & Catering........................ 5<br />
www.dadsplacemaine.com<br />
Firehouse Grill....................................16<br />
www.firehouseauburn.com<br />
George’s Pizza.....................................29<br />
www.georgespizza.com<br />
The Log Yard Dairy Bar................... 30<br />
www.thelogyarddairybar.com<br />
GridIron Restaurant.......................... 18<br />
www.gridironrestaurant.com<br />
Mac’s Grill............................................. 7<br />
www.MacsGrill.com<br />
Pat’s Pizza Auburn.............................. 10<br />
www.patsauburn.com<br />
Roy’s All Steak & Golf Center........ 16<br />
www.RoysGolf.com<br />
Roy’s Foodland....................................10<br />
www.ShopAtRoysFoodland.com<br />
Sea 40 Japanese Cuisine.................... 13<br />
www.sea40me.com<br />
Tailgate Bar & Grill........................... 22<br />
www.TailgateBarAndGrill.biz<br />
Shuga Shak Country Store.....................<br />
30 207.576.7886<br />
Tabers on the Lake............................ 11<br />
www.tabersgolf.com<br />
The Village Inn-Auburn.................... 14<br />
www.villageinnmaine.com<br />
GOLF & RECREATION<br />
Barclay’s Skindivers Paradise........... 26<br />
207.784.7300<br />
Call of the Wild RV Center............. 30<br />
www.callofthewildrv.com<br />
Martindale Country Club................. BC<br />
www.martindalecc.com<br />
Poland Spring Golf Course & Mel’s<br />
Hilltop..................................................20<br />
www.PolandSpringResort.com<br />
Roy’s All Steak Hamburgers<br />
& Golf Center.....................................16<br />
www.RoysGolf.com<br />
Tabers on the Lake............................ 11<br />
www.tabersgolf.com<br />
HEALTH & WELLNESS<br />
Davis PT-A Balanced Approach.. IFC<br />
www.davisptrehab.com<br />
Essence Wellness Spa LLC............... 20<br />
www.essencewellnessspa.com<br />
LA Massage.........................................26<br />
www.lamassagemaine.com<br />
ME Massage........................................27<br />
www.memassagetherapy.com<br />
HEATING & PLUMBING<br />
Heat Pumps of Maine.........................C<br />
www.heatpumpsofmaine.com<br />
HVAC Solutions 207.......................... 26<br />
www.Hvacsoultions207.com<br />
Pro-Tech Refrigeration..................... 30<br />
www.pro-techrefrigeration.com<br />
UPI........................................................17<br />
207.754.4556<br />
HOME IMPROVEMENT<br />
Sturdy Hardware.................................13<br />
www.sturdyhardwareme.com<br />
INSURANCE<br />
Andy Valley Insurance &<br />
Retirement...........................................29<br />
www.agents.horacemann.com/AVIR<br />
Champoux Insurance......................... 21<br />
888.983.2246<br />
Lisa Laliberte-State Farm................... 6<br />
207.783.3332<br />
NFP Insurance....................................20<br />
207.784.9358<br />
Richard Moylan-Allstate................... 29<br />
207.777.0050<br />
MISCELLANEOUS<br />
Fine Line Gun Shop........................... 27<br />
207.998.2374
Your local guide to... well, just about anything!<br />
... BC<br />
el’s<br />
....20<br />
....16<br />
.... 11<br />
IFC<br />
.... 20<br />
....26<br />
....27<br />
LA Metro Chamber of Commerce.. 23<br />
www.lametrochamber.com<br />
William J. Rogers Post #153...... 15<br />
207.782.1118<br />
PET<br />
GAHS Golden Paw Awards... 21<br />
www.SavingPetsInMaine.org<br />
Scoop4Paws...............................29<br />
207.713.1550<br />
PRINT & PROMOTIONAL<br />
Coastal T-Shirts..........................6<br />
www.coastaltshirts.com<br />
Evergreen Custom Printing.....27<br />
207.782.0525<br />
Neokraft Signs..........................16<br />
www.neokraft.com<br />
WIGY Radio.............................31<br />
www.wigyradio.com<br />
PROFESSIONAL CLEANERS<br />
Bin There Dump That.............14<br />
www.binhtheredumpthatusa.com<br />
Collaborative Cleaners............29<br />
207.713.1550<br />
Emerald Janitorial....................26<br />
www.EmeraldJanitorialServices.com<br />
Real Clean..................................27<br />
www.realcleanllc.com<br />
ServiceMaster Restore............17<br />
www.smfireandwater.com<br />
REAL ESTATE<br />
Debbie Bodwell-Guild Mortgage.. BC<br />
207.754.3962<br />
Maine Real Estate Experience. . 29<br />
www.themainerealstateexperience.com<br />
Maine Source Realty..................8<br />
www.mainesourcehomes.com<br />
Upfront Home Inspections.....22<br />
www.upfronthome.me<br />
REDEMPTION CENTERS<br />
Coach Terry’s Redemption Center .27<br />
207.225.2008<br />
Roopers Beverage & Redemption. IFC<br />
www.roopersbeverage.com<br />
RETIREMENT<br />
Andwell Health Partners.........27<br />
www.andwell.org<br />
The Chapman House Assisted<br />
Living .........................................12<br />
207.783.0961<br />
The Meadows Senior Living 10<br />
207.946.3007<br />
WASTE MANAGEMENT<br />
Bin There Dump That.............14<br />
www.binhtheredumpthatusa.com<br />
......C<br />
.... 26<br />
.... 30<br />
....17<br />
....13<br />
*<br />
C-Front<br />
Cover| IFC- inside front cover| BC- back cover |IBC- Inside back cover<br />
,<br />
Thank You To<br />
Our Sponsors<br />
....29<br />
R<br />
.... 21<br />
...... 6<br />
....20<br />
.... 29<br />
.... 27<br />
Hammond Lumber company, Lewiston Firefighters (CBF), Modern Woodman of America, (Community Benefit Fund),<br />
Lydia Media LLC, Poland Fire & Rescue, Bruns Bros, Marcel’s Barber Shop, Auburn Firefighters Local (797 IAFF), Fire &<br />
Explosion Investigation, Otto Pizza, George’s Pizza, Tim Allen (Amazon), Burnt Ends Barbecue, Gary & Cathy Simard,<br />
International Association of Arson, 84 Court Street Restaurant, Investigators (IAAI), Dan & Janet Perreault, Steve Simard,<br />
Maine Community Bank, Community Credit Union, Gridiron Restaurant & Sports Pub, Central Distributors, Fairlawn<br />
Golf Course, All About You Salon, Scott Whalen (Little Debbie, Sunbelt Snacks), Bill Cormier, (UTZ Chips), Dad’s Place<br />
(Mechanic Falls), Legends Sports Bar & Grill, Maine Chapter, I.A.A.I, Pepsi Bottling Group, GAI Engineers, Roy I. Snow,<br />
Inc., Pat’s Pizza, (Mike Gagne), Gritty McDuff ’s Brew Pub, I.A.A.I. Maine Chapter, Poisson & Son’s Car Care, Independent<br />
Electrical Inspections, Inc., Firesafe Equipment Inc., Poland Spring Resort / Golf Course, Firehouse Grill, Above &Beyond,<br />
LLC, Margarita’s Mexican Restaurant, The Fortin Group (Dignity), & American Legion, Post 153, Auburn<br />
If only my ceiling fan could hold my weight, then I would never be bored again.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 35
Lunch is on Us!<br />
Purchase 18 holes with cart & get lunch following play.<br />
(up to $15 - food only. Mon-Thurs before 1pm)<br />
U<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
36 <strong>July</strong> <strong>2024</strong><br />
207-782-1107, EXT 527 1<br />
Beech 527 Beech Hill Rd, Hill Auburn Rd, Auburn | jglicos@martindalecc.com<br />
| *Coupon must be presented at time of purchase - Expires 7/31/24<br />
RECREATIONAL<br />
CANNABIS 21+<br />
OUTLET STORE<br />
First Time Customers 15% Off<br />
First Time Customers 15% OFF<br />
43 Mystique Way, Auburn | 207.245.2645<br />
43 Mystique Way, Auburn 207-245-2645<br />
MystiqueOfMaine.com<br />
MystiqueOfMaine.com<br />
For use by adults 21 years of age and older.<br />
For questions or concerns call 207.245.2645<br />
F oF r o r u us e s e b y b y a da du ul tls t s 2 12 1 y ey ae ra s r s o f o f a ga ge e a na nd d o lo dl de r. e r. L iL ci ec ne ns e s e # # AAM MS 7S 87 08 . 0 . F oF r o r q qu ue se ts ito i no ns s o r o r c oc no nc ec re nr ns s c oc no nt at ca t c t 2 02 70 -7 2- 42 54 -5 2- 62 46 54 5<br />
Second Visit location our at 745 745 Forest Forest Ave., Ave., Portland Portland | 207.815.8524 store | as AMS well.<br />
117, MJ-872341-2021<br />
207-815-8524. AMS 117, MJ-872341-2021<br />
RMS has joined the Guild Mortgage family<br />
We are stronger together<br />
Debbie Bodwell<br />
NMLS# 280336<br />
Debbie.Bodwell@guildmortgage.net<br />
181 Center Street, Auburn, ME 04210<br />
207.754.3962<br />
I am authorized to do business in the states of Maine, North Carolina, South Carolina and Virginia. (www.nmlsconsumeraccess.org)<br />
Guild Mortgage Company; NMLS #3274; Equal Housing Opportunity; www.nmlsconsumeraccess.org.<br />
Lic.# AMS780<br />
Your local guide to... well, just about anything!<br />
NCLEA NDYS.COM