11_UAD_November_2025 WEBSITE

UNCLE
DIGEST
ANDY’S
FREE
NOVEMBER 2025
SINCE 1996
Visit Us, Your Way
In Person or Online
What We Offer
• Financial Confidence
• Stress-Free Banking
• Member-First Care
Locals Supporting
Locals.
We’re Investing in what
matters, our members.
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Upgrade & Save with
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We install top brands like Mitsubishi and Samsung
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FREE ESTIMATE
207-782-7113
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31 Blake Street, Lewiston • armandsautobody.com
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 1

No one does it like Mac’s
Maine’s #1 steakhouse for a reason.
Where the locals eat!
WE ARE HIRING LINE COOKS!
NFL is back!
Watch your game here!
No one does is like we do.
Join us for fun times!
Ask us
about our
Coaster
Club!
November 11
FREE burger for
Veterans w/valid
military ID.
VETERANS
DAY
Boston Baked Salmon
with house seasoning, cracker
crumbs, and choice of two sides
(Pictured: Baked Potato & House Salad)
Our hamburger is
ground fresh daily!
Every Monday 30% off drafts & 20% off burgers
Let Mac’s Cater Your Next Event!
Weddings, Banquets, Birthdays, Corporate Parties, & more!
No event too BIG or SMALL... We cater it ALL!
Now open on Tuesdays!
1052 Minot Avenue, Auburn • 783-6885 • MacsGrill.com

We’re here for you
here
While visiting my daughter,
for
I asked you
if I could borrow her newspaper. She replied,
“This is the 21st century, use my iPad.” Well, that fly never knew what hit him…
We’re here for you
Modern
Modern
Woodmen
Woodmen
of
of
America
America
continues
continues
to
to
be
be
strong
strong
and
and
stable,
stable,
even
even
in
in
these
these
times
times
of
of
uncertainty.
uncertainty.
We’ve
We’ve
been
been
around
around
since
since
1883,
1883,
standing
standing
strong
strong
through
through
world
world
wars,
wars,
national
national
disease
disease
outbreaks,
outbreaks,
depressions
depressions
and
and
recessions.
recessions.
a continues to Do
Do be you
you strong have
have
questions
questions and stable, or
or
concerns
concerns even in about
about these your
your times financial
financial of plan,
plan,
call
call
today.
today.
We
We
will
will
continue
continue
nd since 1883, to
to
be
be
here
here standing for
for
you.
you. strong through world wars, national
ns and recessions.
concerns about Modern your Woodmen financial Art Chamberlain*
of America continues to be strong Paul and Colasante* stable, even in these times Mike of
Art Chamberlain* plan, call today. We will continue Paul Colasante*
Mike
uncertainty. We’ve
Lewiston,
Lewiston, been
ME
ME around
04240
04240 since 1883, standing
Lewiston,
Lewiston, strong
ME
ME through
04240
04240 world wars, national
207-514-7003
207-782-8823
disease outbreaks, 207-514-7003 depressions and recessions. 207-782-8823
Do you have questions or concerns about your financial plan, call today. We will continue
to be here for you.
n*
240
240
240
240
Paul Colasante*
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-782-8823
Richard Art Richard Chamberlain*
Courtemanche
Lewiston, Courtemanche ME 04240
Lewiston, ME 04240
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Lewiston, ME 04240
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Rumford, ME 04276
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Ted Heidrich*
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Ted Richard Heidrich*
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Lewiston, Courtemanche ME 04240
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Matthew Nadeau*
Winthrop, Kim Ted
Kim
Heidrich* Pelkey* ME 04364
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Lewiston,
Pelkey*
ME
Lewiston, 04240
ME 04240
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Mike
Courtemanche*
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-783-8921
Paul Stacy
Stacy Colasante*
Fortin
Fortin
Lewiston, Rumford, ME
Rumford, 04276
ME 04240
207-357-5429
04276
207-782-8823
207-357-5429
Paul Gagne*
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-576-3426
Matthew Nadeau*
Winthrop,
Matthew Stacy Fortin Nadeau*
ME 04364
Winthrop, Rumford, ME 04276 04364
207-395-5177
207-395-5177
207-357-5429
Ron Ouellette*
Lewiston, ME 04240
Seth Matthew Vlahakos* Nadeau*
207-786-3612
Windham, Winthrop, Seth Vlahakos*
ME 04364 04062
207-395-5177
Windham, ME 04062
207-407-7576
207-407-7576
* Registered representative. Seth Kim Vlahakos*
Securities Pelkey* offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of
Registered representative. Securities offered through MWA Financial Services Seth Inc., Vlahakos*
Modern Woodmen of Windham, America.
wholly owned subsidiary of
Lewiston, Member: ME ME 04062 04240 FINRA, SIPC
Modern Woodmen of America. Member: FINRA, SIPC
Windham, ME 04062
207-407-7576
207-786-2573
207-407-7576
d through MWA
*
Financial
Registered
Services
representative.
Inc., a wholly
Securities
owned
offered
subsidiary
through MWA
of
Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of
Modern Woodmen of America. Member: FINRA, SIPC
INRA, SIPC
Courtemanche*
Lewiston,
Courtemanche*
ME 04240
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-783-8921
207-783-8921
Paul Mike Gagne*
Lewiston,
Paul Gagne*
Courtemanche* ME 04240
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-576-3426
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-576-3426
207-783-8921
Ron Ouellette*
Lewiston,
Ron Paul Ouellette* Gagne*
ME 04240
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-786-3612
207-786-3612
207-576-3426
Ron Ouellette*
Lewiston, ME 04240
207-786-3612
The Flight
A small plane is
mid air when the
engine suddenly
dies.
The pilot runs out of
the cockpit, grabs a
parachute, and says,
“Sorry, there are only
three parachutes
left,” and jumps out.
This leaves 4
passengers: a boy
scout, a college
professor, a priest,
and a doctor.
The doctor says,
“I need to be saved.
I heal people and am
a valuable resource
to the human
population.” He
grabs a parachute
and jumps out.
The professor says,
“I’ve won the Nobel
Peace Prize. I’m the
smartest man alive.
I need to be saved.”
He grabs a
parachute and jumps
out.
There’s one
parachute left.
The priest says,
“Son, I’ve lived a
long and fruitful life.
You are young and
have the rest of your
life in front of you.
Take the last
parachute.”
The scout replies,
“It’s okay, Father.
The smartest man
alive just jumped out
of the plane with my
backpack.”
I bought an impressionist painting of some flowers, but when I got back
home the cat scratched it. Now I'm trying to sell it as a Clawed Monet.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 3

Out and About
at Smile Again
Dentures
I took my wife to an orchard for her birthday. We stood there looking at trees
for a half hour. Apparently, it wasn’t the Apple Watch she was expecting.
Smile Again
Dentures
Like our name implies,
We’ll
help you
smile again!
Abi Hilton
No. These are
not mine!
Jack
• Full Dentures • Immediate Dentures • Partial Dentures
• Rebases • Relines • Repairs
Cassandra Gagnon
Hey! Mr. Out
& About, I found your
teeth!
Cassandra
Gagnon, LD
Joe
Adkins, LD
Licensed Denturists
Mike
Adkins, LD
Emily Ouellette
Uncle Andy’s Digest
4 November 2025
801 Webster Street, Lewiston | 514-0660
SmileAgainDentures.com | smileagaindentures@gmail.com
Nobody lies harder than a dog who just had dinner but is pretending nobody
fed them dinner while their other parent is giving them a second dinner.

There’s No Place Like...
YOUR ONE-STOP SHOP
Hot & Ready
Order ahead,
or sit and eat!
Grab ‘n’ Go!
Agency Liquor Store
With Beer Cave
$1.00
$1.00 OFF LARGE PIZZA
(must present coupon at the time of purchase) UAD exp. 11.30.25
Dad’s Scoops
Scoops!
$1.00
$1.00 OFF ANY SIZE
ICE CREAM
(must present coupon at the time of purchase) UAD exp. 11.30.25
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 5
207-345-5551

When I'm behind a slow car I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see it isn't my fault.
T
h a
Quality Products
Reasonable Pricing
H
appy
We are
Hiring!
It’s why
we’re here.
Always a call or click away!
Call, click or stop by today.
Let’s talk today!
Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.®
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T
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Our Team
PAM
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PUBLISHER
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SIMARD
SALES
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RUCKER
SALES
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TURCOTTE
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GENDRON-LABBE
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UNCLE ANDY’S DIGEST
is distributed by the first Friday of every month by Lydia Media
LLC with its headquarters located at
2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B, Auburn, Maine. Published and
distributed since 1996 throughout Central Maine and mailed to
subscribers all over the Free World. Subscriptions are $49 .95 /year.
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While Uncle Andy’s Digest tries very hard to ensure the accuracy of the
information in our clients’ advertisements and our publication in general, we
are not responsible for vendor availability, typographical errors, technical
inaccuracies, product pricing errors, or omissions.
UNCLE ANDY'S DIGEST is proudly printed in Lewiston, Maine
Uncle Andy’s Digest
6 November 2025
www.penmor.com

I can't decide if people who wear pajamas in public
have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.
Out and About
at Smile Again
Dentures
There’s plenty of
smiles here at Smile
Again Dentures!
Home for senior ladies
Jessi Hilton
I never smile.
Providing a warm and comfortable home for our residents.
The Chapman House is a
residence for senior women.
Our residents experience the freedom of a carefree life
style and no household chores to worry about.
They maintain their independence in rooms that reflect
their identity.
Experience new friendships with us!
Jack Blackburn
The Chapman House has private rooms available
for residents, aged 65 and older, who need
assistance with bathing, medications, and meals.
Lori Stuart
41 Pleasant Street, Auburn | 207-783-0961
Bonnie Iwans
I hate when someone rings my doorbell because then I have to
drop whatever I’m doing to be silent and pretend I’m not home.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 7

Out and About
at Smile Again
Dentures
*Day 3 of the kidnapping* The kidnappers are now offering my wife
$10,000 if she'll take me back, but she's holding out for more.
Joe,
have you seen my
glasses? I can’t find
them!
Mike Adkins
Really Dad? LOL!
Joe Adkins
I've got your smile
ready!
Sonja Thibodeau
Uncle Andy’s Digest
8 November 2025
I stepped on the bathroom scale at my mom's house and now
I have to replace her window and add $300 to the swear jar.

If you can’t handle me when I’m broke, then you don’t deserve me when I have $20.
NATCHOS SUPREME
GENEROUS PORTION OF CHIPS, TOPPED
WITH ONION, GREEN PEPPER, TOMATO,
JALAPENO, AND A BLEND OF JACK AND
CHEDDAR CHEESE W/SALASA.
ADD BEEF, CHICKEN, OR CHILI
Take Out
Available!
207-782-2135 Auburn Mall
Tues. - Wed., 11am - 7pm • Thurs. - Sat. 11am - 8pm • Sun. 11am - 5pm
DAILY SPECIALS
MONDAY - CLOSED
Fried Pickle Basket
Thatcher’s Burger
25oz domestic drafts
3 Beef Tacos
Thatcher’s Burrito
Well Margaritas • Coronas
Stuffed Peppers
Buffalo Chicken Salad
Microbrews
FRIDAY
Clam Cake Basket
Fish & Chips
2 Hot Dogs w/fries
Miller Lite Bottles
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY
SATURDAY
SUNDAY
THURSDAY
12" Cheese Pizza
Bloody Mary’s
Domestic Light/Lite Drafts
Respect those who wear glasses. They paid money to see you.
OIL & GAS BOILER CLEANINGS
Heating Systems Are On!
The
After Life
Big Dan died and
went to Heaven.
St. Peter says to him
“Before you meet
with God, I should
tell you,we’ve looked
over your life, and to
be honest you really
didn’t do anything
particularly good or
bad. We’re not really
sure what to do with
you. Can you tell us
anything you did that
can help us make a
decision?”
Big Dan, the newly
arrived soul, thought
for a moment and
replied, “Yeah, once
I was driving along
and came upon a
little old lady who
was being harassed
by a group of thugs.
So I pulled over and
went up to the leader
of the thugs. He was
a big, muscular guy
with a ring pierced
through his lip. Well,
I tore the ring out of
his lip, and told him
he and his gang had
better stop
bothering this lady or
they would have to
deal with me!”
CALL FOR PRICING
207-754-4556
Keep it running & effecient!
Get Your Yearly
Boiler Cleaning
and Servicing
“Wow that’s
impressive. When
did this happen?”
St. Peter asked.
“About three minutes
ago,” replied Big
Dan.
So, it's fine for my cat to run and hide under the bed when visitors show up...
But when I do it, I'm "rude" and "antisocial"?
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 9

Frank’s
Chihuahua
Frank takes his sick
Chihuahua to the
veterinarian. They’re
immediately taken
back to a room.
First, a Labrador
walks in, sniffs the
Chihuahua for 10
minutes, and leaves.
Next, a cat comes in,
stares at the
Chihuahua for 10
minutes, and leaves.
Finally, the doctor
comes in, prescribes
some medicine, and
hands the man a
$250 bill.
“This must be a
mistake,” the man
says. “I’ve been here
only 20 minutes!”
My son said a girl at school yelled at him and all he could do was sit there and
wonder what he'd done wrong. I told him, "Now you're ready for marriage."
Let Us Help You FALL in Love
with Your Next Home
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I suck in my stomach while standing on the bathroom scale.
My weight doesn't change, but at least I can see the numbers.
Valerie
Landry
The vet says, “No
mistake. It’s $100 for
the lab test, $100 for
the cat scan and $50
for the medicine.”
Open Daily
11am-9pm
207.777.6353 | gridironrestaurant.com | 1567 Lisbon St. Lewiston
Uncle Andy’s Digest
10 November 2025
I’ve officially hit the milestone age where an all-nighter means
I slept through the night without a single bathroom break.

Today I learned you can't use "beef stew” for a password...It's not stroganoff.
THE AMERICAN LEGION
FAMILY
RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on Fridays
and get a surprise!
“SEE YOU AT THE POST!”
Members & Guests Welcome!
AMERICAN LEGION ACT
Veterans who were honorably discharged
but whose service did not fall into previously
defined war eras may now join
the American Legion immediately. The
eligibility now spans from Dec. 7, 1941,
until a time when the U.S. is no longer at
war, as determined by Congress.
RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on
Fridays and get a surprise! “SEE YOU AT THE POST!”
For Veteran or Community services, call
207-782-1118 or 207-873-3229
Hall Rentals Available
Call for more
information
207-782-1118
When I was a kid, my parents would always say, "Pardon my French," after swearing.
I'll never forget my first day at school when my teacher asked if I knew any French.
ATTN: FOOD TRUCKS-
Need A Kitchen?
Rent Our Commercial Kitchen
Flexible Hours
Affordable Rates &
Convenient Location.
71 South Main St, Auburn • 207-782-1118
HOURS: Monday - Thursday: 12pm-8pm
Friday: 12pm-11pm • Saturday: 12pm-9pm • Sunday: 11am-6pm
MUSIC, KARAOKE & DANCE w/ JEAN LOUIS!
FRIDAYS 7-11pm in November
Jerry Joe - November 14th & 28th • 4:30 - 6:30pm
Saturday, November 8th, 5-7pm Sitcom Trivia
Presented by Tyla & Keith
Happy Veterans Day, Nov 11
Chili cook-off starts at 11am (Chili Bowl decor)
Saturday, November 15th Chicken Parmesan Dinner
pasta, salad w/ dressing & dinner roll 4-6pm $10
Sunday, November 16th, Breakfast Buffet 8-10am
Saturday, November 29th, 5-7pm Music Bingo w/Tyla & Keith
Son’s Meeting Monday, November 10th 5:30pm
MONTHLY MEETING WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 19TH 2025
EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE 6PM
GENERAL MEMBERSHIP 7PM
LEGION MEMBERS IN ATTENDANCE HAVE A CHANCE TO WIN
$100, $50 OR $25
Striving to invigorate hope,
bringing dreams to life.
Providing Direct Support To Maine Adults With Intellectual Disabilities.
• Yoga Instructor
one day a month (couple of hours)
Our services can be very
rewarding in doing good for
others.
Be part of something where
others can give your life new
meaning
Brilliant
Business
woman
Darren, a New York
attorney
representing a
wealthy art collector,
called his client and
said to him, “Saul,
I have some good
news and I have
some bad news.”
The art collector
replied, “I’ve had an
awful day; let’s hear
the good news first.”
Darren said, “Well,
I met with your
wife today, and she
informed me that
she invested $5,000
in two pictures that
she thinks will bring
a minimum of $15-20
million. I think she
could be right.”
Saul replied
enthusiastically,
“Well done! My
wife is a brilliant
businesswoman!
You’ve just made my
day. Now I know I
can handle the bad
news. What is it?”
The attorney replied,
“The pictures are of
you with your
secretary.”
happyhaven.info | 134 Main St. Suite 1 & 2, Lewiston | Phone- 207-241-0274 | Fax- 207-241-7280
The opposite of "easy peasy lemon squeezy" is "stressed depressed lemon zest."
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 11

Not Much of
a Fighter
Jim, a truck driver, is
starving and stops at
a biker bar to eat.
He goes inside, sits
down at the bar, and
orders a beer and
some food. Right
after he’s served, a
biker gang enters the
bar, eager for a fight.
One walks up to the
trucker, and slaps his
hat off. The trucker
takes a sip of beer.
Another biker swats
his food off the bar.
The trucker takes
another sip of beer.
So a third biker
grabs the beer and
pours it over the
trucker’s head.
The trucker gets up,
pays the bill, and
leaves.
Always be yourself. An original is worth more than a copy.
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Why does my wife always wait until I'm at the opposite end of
the house before asking me to "merm frner mernferr brneffer"?
The biker leader
says, “That trucker
sure wasn’t much of
a fighter.”
The bartender
glances out the
window and says,
“He’s not much of a
driver either. He just
smashed his truck
into a row of
motorcycles.”
Uncle Andy’s Digest
12 November 2025
Facebook has taught me two things: 1. There are some incredibly
brilliant people in this world. 2. They're vastly outnumbered.

The fact that Keith Richards and Willie Nelson have outlived
Richard Simmons has me rethinking this whole eating right and exercise thing.
The Genius
WELCOME TO THE LA METRO CHAMBER
NEW MEMBERS!
Milestones Federal Credit Union
milestonesfcu.com
Central Maine Federal Credit Union
centralmainecu.com
Breaking Orbit LLC
breakingorbit.com
Horizon Visual Media
horizonvisualmedia.com
A proud and
confident genius
makes a bet with an
idiot.
The genius says,
“Hey idiot, every
question I ask you
that you don’t know
the answer, you
have to give me $5.
And if you ask me a
question and I can’t
answer yours I will
give you $5,000.”
The idiot says,
“Okay.”
415 LISBON STREET, LEWISTON • LAMETROCHAMBER.COM
I noticed a letter on my doormat. The envelope was stamped
"Do Not Bend". I spent half the day wondering how to pick it up.
Check presentation to the St. Dom’s Middle School girls soccer team for their efforts to supply the
Students Resource Center in Lewiston. Mia Renaud to right
The genius then
asks, “How many
continents are there
in the world?”
The idiot doesn’t
know and hands
over the $5.
The idiot says, “Now
me ask: what animal
stands with two
legs but sleeps with
three?”
The genius tries and
searches very hard
for the answer but
gives up and hands
over the $5000. The
genius says, “Dang
it, I lost. By the way,
what was the answer
to your question?”
The idiot hands over
$5.
Left to right: Mike Mathieu, Brooklyn Dunbar, Mia Renaud
My grocery list: 1. Don’t run into anyone I know. 2. Bread.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 13

Out and About
at Central
Maine
Audiology
I don't know about you, but I've thought about running
away more as an adult than I ever did as a kid.
Helping you
hear better is our
main priority!
OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK!
YEAR ROUND!
723 Maine St.
Poland, Me
(207)998-5008
FULL MENU
FULL BAR - CRAFT BEER
Get $5 off your food
with this coupon!
Uncle Andys
Dr. Bryce Cropper
Ian Mishler
SPACE IS LIMITED.
SCHEDULE YOUR COMMERCIAL SNOW SERVICES IN ADVANCE!
PLOWING & REMOVAL
AVAILABLE
•COMMERCIAL
•RESIDENTIAL
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Mark Lamonte
Call or Email 207.754.2343 | info@hirdcontracting.com
Your Trusted
Excavation Contractor
Uncle Andy’s Digest
14 November 2025
If we're only talking about looks, I'm a 6. If you include
my personality, sense of humor, and values...I'm a solid 2.

I was about to use the new shampoo, but the
bottle said it's for dry hair and I just wet mine...
Out and About
at Central
Maine
Audiology
gippers.com 120 center st. auburn 207.786.0715
Residential Friendly Dumpsters
Bin Sizes:
Rent a
dumpster
today for your
clean up
tomorrow!
10 yd. bin - 10’ long x 7’ wide - 4’ high
14 yd. bin - 11’ long x 8’ wide - 4.5’ high
20 yd. bin - 11’ long x 8’ wide - 6’ high
“We work with people, not just
portfolios — helping Maine families
plan for what really matters.”
Scan to learn more!
475 Pleasant St. Ste 13 | Lewiston, ME
207-784-5171
Dispatch
Office: 207-224-0337
Cell: 207-212-0736
170 N. Daggett Hill Rd.
Greene, ME 04236
portlandme@bintheredumpthat.com
Our Residential Friendly Design Includes
Easy Load Double Rear Doors
Driveway Protection Boards
Dependable Friendly Service
207-224-0337
www.bintheredumpthatusa.com
Securities offered through Raymond James Financial Services, Inc., member FINRA/SIPC. Investment advisory services are offered through Raymond
James Financial Services Advisors, Inc. Investment Concepts is not a registered broker/dealer and is independent of Raymond James Financial Services.
I shouted frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and about to deliver our baby!"
The doctor asked, "Is this her first child?" No!", I said. "It's her husband!"
Angela
Thanks for coming.
Here’s a little treat
for you!
Erica Beaulieu
Weakness
Bob goes for a job
interview.
The interviewer
asks, “What is your
biggest weakness?”
Bob thinks and says,
“I don’t know how
to be anything other
than completely
honest.”
The interviewer
says, “I don’t see
how that could be a
weakness."
Bob looks the
interviewer right in
the eye and says,
“I don’t really care
what you think.”
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 15

The
Elephant
One day, a man with
an elephant walks
into a movie theater.
“I’m afraid I can’t
let your elephant in
here, sir,” the manager
says.
“Oh, I assure you,
he’s very well
behaved,” the man
says.
“All right then,” the
manager says. “If
you’re sure.”
The man said,
“Trust me. He’ll be
perfectly quiet.”
After the movie, the
manager goes up
to the man and the
elephant and says,
“I’m very surprised!
Your elephant was
very well behaved.
He even seemed to
enjoy the movie!”
The man shot a look
at the elephant and
said, “Yeah, I was
surprised, too.
He hated the book.”
My favorite childhood memory is falling asleep on the couch and waking up in bed.
I miss teleporting. It never happens to me anymore.
5-Star-Rated
Audiologists for High-
Quality, Compassionate
Hearing Care
Call to schedule
today!
(207) 640-2609
Keep Your Brain in Shape!
Did you know hearing well keeps your brain sharp?
Treating hearing loss can reduce the risk of dementia.
Schedule a hearing test today!
www.hearmaine.com 475 Pleasant St., Lewiston 65 Lincoln Ave., Rumford
Eligible for Medicare?
CALL US TODAY
to see which Medicare health plan best fits your needs.
30+
Years of
Experience!
Visit us at 184 Webster Street, Lewiston
Book your holiday
parties now!
OPEN Thanksgiving
4pm-Close
Looking for a new
tradition this
Thanksgiving?
Let us do the cooking!
40 East Avenue, Lewiston | www.sea40me.com | 207-795-6888
Uncle Andy’s Digest
16 November 2025
What’s the difference between Iron Man and Aluminum Man?
Iron Man stops the bady guys. Aluminum Man foils their plans.

Banks should do a better job of keeping their ATMs filled.
I’ve been to five today and they all say “insufficient funds”.
Hide and
Seek
We have all your
hunting, firearms,
ammo & accessories
Rt. 4 in Turner • Just past Twitchell’s Airport • 225-3432 • www.G3Firearms.com
Mr. and Mrs. Brown
had two sons. One
was named Mind
Your Own Business
& the other was
named Trouble.
One day the two
boys decided to play
hide and seek.
Trouble hid while
Mind Your Own
Business counted to
one hundred.
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Mind Your Own
Business began
looking for his
brother behind
garbage cans and
bushes. Then he
started looking in
and under cars until
a police man
approached him and
asked, “What are
you doing?”
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“Playing a game,”
the boy replied.
“What is your
name?” the officer
questioned.
“Mind Your Own
Business.”
Furious the
policeman inquired,
“Are you looking for
trouble?!”
The boy replied,
“Why, yes!”
(800) 848-3688 | www.otisfcu.coop
Traditional mortgages serviced by CUSO Home Lending. Current credit and other eligibility criteria apply. For full disclosure details,
please visit www.otisfcu.coop. Federally Insured by NCUA. Equal Housing Lender.
You can tell a lot about a person by obtaining a fraudulent therapist license.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 17

Out and About
at Republic
Jewelry
Jewelry
is a girls
best friend.
What’s green, fuzzy, has four legs, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table.
Call us TODAY!
We maintain your home so you
don’t have to.
Services
Inspections • Air Duct Cleaning
• Dryer Vet Cleaning • Heat Pump Cleaning
• Routine Home Maintenance
November Special!
$100 off air duct or
heat pump cleaning
207-619-0868
Jennifer Dube
Got Coin!?
Join Us For Thanksgiving Dinner
Book your banquet events now before it’s too late!
Edward Miville
Pumpkin spice
White Russian
A local favorite
The Village Inn
Serving our traditional
full course holiday menu!
(Plus a limited menu)
Open 11a-6p
207-782-7796 | 165 High Street, Auburn | villageinnmaine.com | Open Wednesday - Sunday
The Right
Coverage at the
Right Price.
Discover insurance solutions from local industry experts
dedicated to protecting your assets. From risk consulting
to claims support, we’ve got you covered.
John Blanchette, Sales Advisor | 207.784.9358
john.blanchette@nfp.com
Jeff Brocker
For your business.
For your people.
For your life.
NFP.com
Copyright ©2022 NFP. All Rights Reserved.
Visit our new NFP office:
681 Sabattus St | Lewiston, ME 04240
Uncle Andy’s Digest
18 November 2025
Did you know there’s a pen that can write underwater? It can write other words, too.

What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.
Muriel celebrated...
her 90th birthday with us
and can't wait for the next party!
The Meadows
“Maine’s Most Affordable Senior Living Center”
Out and About
at Republic
Jewelry
We have the
perfect gift for any
occasion!
A warm home-style assisted living center for self-sufficient seniors!
We have availability starting at $1500 per month
#433 RT. 202, P.O. BOX 629, GREENE • 946-3007
WHERE QUALITY
MEETS RELAXATION
Inground &
Aboveground Pools
• Liner replacements
• Service & Maintenance
• Opening & Closing
• Equipment Upgrades
• Residential Plowing & Sanding
207-713-5384
EastAuburnPools@Yahoo.com
EastAuburnPoolsAndServices.com
Chrissy Ames
Wendy Younk &
Erik Poulin
They have
the best stuffies
here!
We have your hunting gear & supplies!
Visit our Sturdy Sporting Goods Department
We are a tagging station!
186 Sabattus Road, Sabattus, ME • (207) 375-6253
2 Miles Off I-95 Exit 86 Family Owned & Operated
James & Chloe
Gannon
Note to self: A home DNA test is not a good baby shower gift.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 19

CHILDCARE
Scan the QR above or visit alymca.org
to book a tour today.
EARLY CHILDHOOD EDUCATION
Offering two locations in Auburn for Infants to Age 5:
Turner Street
Temple Garden
(62 Turner St, Auburn) (74 Bradman St, Auburn)
Contact Jennifer Merrill Contact Jamie Westling
jmerrill@alymca.org jwestling@alymca.org
207-795-4095 ext. 213 207-713-3468
AFTER-SCHOOL PROGRAM
For Kindergarten to Grade 6:
Turner Street (62 Turner St, Auburn)
Contact Abigail Fuller
afuller@alymca.org
207-795-4095 ext. 208
alymca.org
WHY
CHOOSE
US?
Y Childcare programs care for kids
of all ages, from Infants to Grade 6.
Convenient 6:30am early morning
start time for ECE at both Y locations.
Financial Aid is available for those who qualify.
Visit alymca.org/financial-aid to get started.
Families with children enrolled receive free YMCA
memberships good for the entire household!
Uncle Andy’s Digest
20 November 2025

Twin Cities Swim Team Winter Season
Weekly practices start Nov at Bates College
Season ends with Y State Meet March 1, 2026
Mash Potato Mile Thanksgiving Day Walk/Run
8:30am – 10:00am Thurs Nov 27, 2025
151 Stetson Road, Auburn, Maine
YMCA of Auburn-Lewiston
Financial aid available for qualifying families
Scan the QR to visit alymca.org
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 21

Out and About
at Sea 40
Geez, that’s so
bright I can’t even
see my phone!
Amal and Juan are twins. Their mother carries only one
baby photo in her wallet. Because if you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.
Relaxation
Awaits
Drift into calm with our
Signature Facial and 90-Minute Massage bundle.
Eden Deletetsky &
Deneka Deletetsky
Griffin Violette
LA’S #1 STOP FOR ALL
YOUR MUSIC NEEDS!
207-376-3376
BOOK YOUR ONLINE AT ESSENCEWELLNESSSPA.COM
207-539-5128 | 11 MECHANIC FALLS RD, OXFORD
MASSAGE | FACIALS | SAUNA | FOOT SOAKS | LASHES | WAXING | OPEN DAILY
Main Street
Music Lessons
33 Dunn Street, Auburn | mainstreetmusiclessons.com
WE ARE RAFFELING OFF THIS
VINTAGE LUDWIG DRUM SET
TO BENEFIT THE
MAIN ST MUSIC LESSONS
ROGER RENAUD
MEMORIAL
SCHOLARSHIP FUND
$20 EACH OR 3 FOR $50
STOP BY OUR SHOW ROOM
AND GET YOURS TODAY.
DRAWING NOVEMBER 29TH
Zane Deletetsky
Uncle Andy’s Digest
22 November 2025
full SERVIcE pRopanE
InSTallaTIon
foR STandbY gEnERaToRS!
financing options noW availaBle
You Can’t Go Wrong When You Call Strong!
Exercise gives you energy, but you need energy to exercise.
Sounds like a pyramid scheme to me.
Accepting New
Delivery Customers!

I quit playing poker at the laundromat. I kept having to fold!
Out and About
at Sea 40
Crystal Couture &
Shelby Rucker
Can I be in
the Digest?!
Travis Dow
Older folks know all about living on the edge, we used to answer the phone without knowing who was calling.
SeptIc InstallatIon House Lots
CommercIAl plowIng
Year round servIces
GIve us a call today!
207.754.6436
WWW.DIONNECONSTRUCTIONSERVICES.COM
Poisson & Sons Auto Care
260 S. Main Street, Auburn 207.782.9144
FULL SERVICE GAS STATION
Is your vehicle ready for
cold/winter weather?
It’s Coming- Are Your Ready?
November
Stickers Are Due!
Hey Readers!
Tell our advertisers you saw them in Uncle Andy's!
Check out our Gift Guide starting on page 26!
2 Great Falls Plaza Suite 1B, Auburn | 207.783.7039 | uncleandys.com
Not all construction work is equally enjoyable. For example, enlarging a
drilled hole is boring, but fastening pieces of metal together is riveting.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 23

Congrats Kira on 6
months sober!!! Can’t
wait to celebrate 7
months soon. Everyone
is so proud of you, keep
it up! -Lindsey
Congratulations to Carrie Whitmore, RN,
team leader in Oncology, for receiving this
year’s Amanda Dempsey Award!
Congratulations to Emily Vincent on her
one year anniversary at Simply Breathe
Therapy in Lewiston! We’re so grateful for
the dedication and care she brings to our
team and clients every day.
Shout out to the AMS principal directing traffic
daily with care and a smile, keeping students
safe and mornings smooth. A true example of
leadership! -A thankful anonymous AMS Parent
Congratulations to these four amazing people as
semi-finalists for Maine State Teacher of the Year!
Uncle Andy’s Digest
24 November 2025

Submit your Shout
Out today to be
published in the
next issue!
* Must be submitted by
11/23 for December.*
Happy 75th Belated
Birthday to my mom,
Cheryl Crafts!
We love you so much!
Love, Shannon & Mike
To a very special lady.
Happy Birthday!!
Have a great day Pam!
-Sharon Morissette
LydiaMediaLLC.com
Happy Halloween and
Sweet 16 baby girl!
mom loves you
Happy Birthday, Deb! Cheers to
you! Thank you for being such
a special part of our team!
-Maine Source Realty
UNCLE ANDY’S DIGEST
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Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 25

Holiday
GIFT GUIDE
Rolly’s Diner
Servıng Up Deliciousness Since 1993
Open for Breakfast & Lunch
87 Mill St., Auburn
Fun & Excitement For All Ages
• Bowling- Candle-pin & 10 Pin
• Soft Ball/Baseball Simulators
•Restaurant & Bar
• Pool Tables - Arcade Games
• Glow Bowling
• Birthday Packages
Give the Gift of Tile this Holiday Season!
Gift Cards Available!
Full Service Repair Facility
COMPLETE
MECHANICAL REPAIR
25 Fern Street, Turner, Maine
Uncle
(207)
Andy’s
225-5012
Digest
www.dickautobody.com
26 November 2025
PROTECT YOUR
INVESTMENT
PROFESSIONAL
UNDERCOATING

Shop local - check out these great gift ideas!
The best gift
is a planned
Vacation
Erin Dunbar
FAMILY TRAVEL SPECIALIST
207.329.8517
erin.dunbar@cctcagent.com
erindunbar.cctcagent.com
Holiday Arrangements
& endless unique gift
ideas all in one stop!
FALL MUMS & HOLIDAY DECOR
539 Webster Street, Lewiston | 207-783-8566
Blais Esthetics LLC.
Jayden Blais
Licensed Esthetician &
Permanent Makeup Artist
Specializing in
• Permanent Makeup
• Lashes & Brows
• Facials & Waxing
Gift Certificates Available
7 Cobblestone Way, Suite 1, Turner
207.225.2346 • www.blaisestheticsllc.com
Visit us,
we have
goodies for
Valentines
Day!
OPEN YEAR ROUND!
COOKED FRESH DAILY
Cashews • Almonds
Redskins • Spanish
Blanch • Pistachios
Mixed Nuts
WE’RE NOT JUST NUTS!
Needhams, Merckens,
Melting Chocolates, & MORE!
Hours: Tues, Wed, Thur 9am-5pm, Fri 9am-3pm
Closed: Nov. 27 Thanksgiving Day | Nov. 28 open 9am-3pm
557 Lincoln Rd, Lewiston 207-783-1731 • BobsPeanuts.com
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 27

Holiday
GIFT GUIDE
Shepards Pie
GIFT CARDS AVAILABLE!
Purchase gift cards online at memassagetherapy.com
or set up a pickup time at our office by calling
Uncle Andy’s Digest
28 November 2025
CALL TODAY!
Making gift-giving easier
thoughtfulgiving.org
GIVE THE GIFT OF
PIZZA & MORE!
Pat’s Pizza gift cards make
great stocking stuffers!
85 Center Street, Auburn
11a-9p daily
207-784-8221
207.240.6415 | www.memassagetherapy.com
Scuba!
a pERfEcT
chRiSTmaS
gifT foR
ThE wholE
familY!
784-7300
805 Main Street, Lewiston | skindiversparadise.com
Gift a full year
subscription To
LA Metro
Magazine
digital or delivered
right to your door.

I heard a rumor about the new math teacher. She thinks we
should all use the metric system. I can’t wait to meter.
Upcoming Shows
Out and About
at Sea 40
OMG!
Nov. 2 Fiddle-icious concert
Nov. 8 Homecoming Dance w/coat drive
Sponsors: Emerson Chevy and DJ Brothers
Nov. 22 Fleetwood Mac tribute concert
Sponsors: Norway Savings Bank and Platz Associates
Holiday-themed La Rencontre!
Sponsors: TV5 Monde
Dec. 19, 20, 21
Sights & Sounds of Christmas
Sponsors: Dirigo Federal Credit Union and DJ Brothers
Jan. 24 Dueling Pianos
Sponsors: Berman & Simmons and Maine Community Bank
Feb. 28 Lady Gaga tribute concert
Sponsors: Dirigo Federal Credit Union and Norway Savings Bank
March 27, 28 Mystery Dinner Theater : CLUE
Sponsors: Platz Associates; Skelton Taintor & Abbott; DJ Brothers
April 24 Elton John tribute concert
Sponsors: Skelton Taintor & Abbott and Emerson Chevrolet
May 16 Rod Stewart tribute concert
Sponsors: Platz Associates and Berman & Simmons
Deneka Deletetsky
Happy
Birthday, Sis!
Love you!
Tiffany Fortier
Unlock the thrill! Gather friends
for a 1-hour Escape Room
adventure—$15 per person. Can
you beat the clock? Reserve your
spot now: bookeo.com/franco
Season Underwriter: Maple Way Dental Care;
Media Sponsors: Bennett Radio Group | Turner Publishing | Sun Journal | Uncle Andy’s Digest
Michael & Fiona
Violette
46 Cedar St., Lewiston
207-689-2000
www.francocenter.org
Eating alone at school: I’m miserable, I feel so self-conscious.
Eating alone as an adult: This is the best part of my day.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 29

CALL THE PROS
Office & Light Industrial Cleaning Services
Serving Lewiston & Auburn Since 2018
Mike Magretto
Veteran Owned & Operated
EmeraldJanitorialServices.com
EVERGREEN
CUSTOM PRINTING, INC.
call Today for a quoTe!
207-530-8890
full Color
dIGITal prInTInG
• Posters
• Booklets
• Carbonless forms
• Envelopes
• Business Cards & More!
782-0525
2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B, Auburn | Info@evergreencustomprinting.com
Family Owned & Operated
Quality Meats Since 1930
Shop local we have everything
you need for your holiday meals!
Open Daily 8am - 7pm
207-782-1385 | 644 Sabattus St, Lewiston | WWW.BOURQUESMARKET.COM
Accounting
& Tax
Service You
Can Trust!
MICHAEL G. SPAULDING, P.A.
Certified Public Accountant
Tax Planning & Preparation
for Individuals and Business
P.O. Box 895 | 207.782.1040
2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B | Auburn, ME 04212
RON’S
TRANSMISSION REPAIR SERVICE
YOUR FULL SERVICE
REPAIR FACILITY
Transmission overheating?
Burning smell?
Transmission leaks?
Delayed shifting?
Better see us!
515 Gardiner Rd. Wales
MOBILE CPR & BLS TRAINING
FOR ALL OF MAINE
For both healthcare professionals
and lay people. We come to your
location for your convenience!
CALL TODAY
Offering Certification
and Re-certification
19 Roy Street Lewiston | 207-330-0322
We Specialize in domestic car & truck,
automatic & manual transmissions,
transfer cases & differentials.
Wishing all a
Happy Thanksgiving
375-4924 Ron
Coach Terry’s
REDEMPTION
CENTER
The friendly redemption center
Charpentier, Jr.,
Owner
HAPPY THANKSGIVING
8 Tidswell Road Turner, 207-225-2008
Open daily 8am to 4pm
Thanksgiving
Basket Raffle!
Free To Join.
Drawing Nov. 20th
Uncle Andy’s Digest
30 November 2025
The invention of the shovel was groundbreaking,
but the invention of the broom swept the nation.

CALL THE PROS
Stay toasty and
be the coolest
bird around!
Call for your
preventative maintenance
OR a free quote today!
207-777-5600
24 Hour Service
Proudly serving Auburn,
Lewiston, and the surrounding
communities!
235 N. River Road, Auburn
pro-techrefrigeration.com | theresa@pro-techrefrigeration.com
Hunting Season Starts at
Fine Line Gun Shop
GUNS • AMMO • SUPPLIES
finelinegun@aol.com
Huge
selection of
hunting rifles
(207) 998-2374
590 Plains Rd., Poland
Specializing In
Chicken & Seafood
Since 2012
Your trusted,
nonprofit resource
for assistance
and information
CLOSED Thanksgiving day
Open tues - sat | 11am - 7pm
The Coast isn’t that far-
it’s right here at KP’s Place
207.376.4295 | 245 Center St, Auburn
207.240.4048
Call NOW for a
FREE NO OBLIGATION
Estimate.
We Are Fully Insured.
Locally Owned.
Corey@gutterbrothersmaine.com
www.GutterBrothersMaine.com
Medicare counseling • Caregiver support
Educational programming • Meals on Wheels
seniorsplus.org • 207-795-4010
Check out our new monthly
podcast produced with
Lydia Media
LIVE
Search “Lewiston Live”anywhere you listen to your favorite podcasts
We’ll discuss all things Lewiston with Lewiston’s
new City Administrator Bryan Kaenrath
Are You A Small Business?
We Can help you with Advertising!
It Works!
Give us
a call Today
207-783-7039
2 great falls plaza suite 1b, Auburn
If you hear me telling the same story twice, just let it go.
I only have six memories and they all take turns.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 31

Roy’s
FoodLand
WE ARE OPEN!
CALL THE PROS
What’s going on at HOPPER’S?
Monday- Hospitality & Mug Club Night
Food industry workers- 1/2 off food & drink specials
Thursday- Cribbage Night 6pm
$5 entry fee
Friday- Open Mic 6pm
Music, Comedy, Poetry
Saturday- Trivia Night 6pm
207.784.9773 316 Pinewoods Rd. Lewiston
Best Chicken &
Ham Salad In Town!
70 Broad Street, Auburn
207-783-8471
Mon.-Thurs. 8am-6pm • Fri. 8am-7pm
Sat. 8am-6pm • Sun. Closed
207.224.0222
www.redmapleaudiology.com
info@redmapleaudiology.com
Happy Veterans Day
Happy Thanksgiving
SATURDAY
Beans, bread/
rolls & cole slaw
$12.99
Ancient wisdom meets
modern science:
acupuncture has been
helping humans chill out
and heal up for more
than two millennia.
Football Happy Hour
Drinks & food specials
during all live NFL &
College games
WEDNESDAY
Ham, Veggie,
Salami, or
Pepperoni Italians
$3.99
Let us help you
reconnect with
conversations
7 Cobblestone Dr. Suite 2, Turner
Ask
Lydia
Dear Lydia,
I accepted an invitation to a
get-together in a couple of
weeks, but I just found out someone will be there
that I’d really rather avoid. I don’t want to be rude,
but I also don’t want to spend the night pretending
to enjoy their company. What should I do?
– Socially Stressed in Sabattus
Dear Socially Stressed in Sabattus,
Oh, friend I’ve been there. Sometimes I get all
excited for a walk, tail wagging, ready to meet
new friends — and then I spot that one dog who
stole my favorite stick last week.
Here’s what I’ve learned: you can’t control who
shows up, but you can decide how you handle
it. Go for the good company, the laughs, and—if
you’re lucky—the snacks. Stick close to the
people (and treats) that make your tail wag, and
keep a polite distance from the ones who don’t.
If things get uncomfortable, take a break! Go
sniff the fresh air (you call it “stepping outside”),
or find a friendly face to chat with. You don’t
have to stay in anyone’s circle who drains your
energy. Even I know when to wander back to my
comfy spot on the couch.
At the end of the day, showing up with kindness
and confidence is better than not showing up
at all. And remember: it’s okay to protect your
peace or take a rain check if it’s really going to
be ruff.
Love and snacks,
Lydia
LITTLE DRAGON INTEGRATIVE MEDICINE
IS NOW ACCEPTING NEW PATIENTS!
369 MAIN ST, LEWISTON | 207-531-5346
Scan here to
submit your
question
Uncle Andy’s Digest
32 November 2025
Whenever I finish eating I need to show my dog my hands like I’m a blackjack dealer.

Sitting in a silent room, full of people. My stomach: This seems
like the perfect time to practice my whale mating sounds.
Got Any
Grapes?
One day a duck
walks in a store and
ask the manager if
they sell grapes.
The manager says,
“No, we don’t sell
grapes.”
The duck goes home
and comes back the
next day and asks
the same question.
The manager says
the same thing
again, “No, we do
not sell grapes.”
The duck goes
home, comes back
the next day, and
asks the manager if
they sell grapes.
If my daughter doesn’t stop having my attitude, I’m moving out.
LA Metro Magazine DIGITAL
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Our articles will no longer be available for free
online, but instead offered exclusively through
a beautifully designed, subscriber-only digital
flipbook — giving you a more engaging and
immersive reading experience.
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that’s easy to read on any device
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This time the
manager says,
“No, we don’t sell
grapes! If you ask
one more time, I will
nail your beak to the
floor!”
The duck goes
home. It comes back
the next day and
asks the manager if
he has any nails.
The manager says,
“No, I don’t have any
nails.”
The duck says,
“Okay, good. Do you
sell grapes?”
I miss the old days when bills didn't have my name on them.
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 33

| EVENTS |
NOVEMBER
LYDIA’S
LUNCH BUNCH
EVERY Sunday
Lewiston Farmers’
Market
75 Lincoln St. and 2 Oxford St.
11am - 1pm
LewistonFarmersMarket.com
Every Tuesday
Trivia Night
Lost Valley
200 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn
6:30pm
LostValleySki.com
Episode 271
Every wednesday
Slow Flow & Stretch
Honeybee Healing Hive,
Yoga & Wellness
170 Main St. Auburn
12pm
FB.com/honeybeehealinghive
Episode 273
Episode 281
Episode 264
Uncle Andy’s Digest
34 November 2025
Comedy Open Mic
Great Falls Comedy Club
34 Court St. Auburn
8pm
GreatFallsComedyClub.com
November 1
Aerial Arts Competition
Aerialympics, Boys & Girls Club
43 2nd St., Auburn, Maine
1pm
November 1-9
Misery
The Public Theatre
31 Maple St. Lewiston
Start times vary
ThePublicTheatre.org
A New Home
Lewiston Middle School
75 Central Ave. Lewiston
Start times vary
LAclt.com
november 5
Paint Night
Marco’s Restaurant
12 Mollisson Way, Lewiston
6pm
FB.com/Cre8tiveEventsMaine
november 6
Caring Conversations
St. Mary’s
99 Campus Ave. Lewiston
4:30pm - 6:30pm
FB.com/alzmaine
Autumn After Dark
Apple Valley Golf Course
316 Pinewoods Rd. Lewiston
6pm - 9pm
FB.com/AthenasByCat
november 8
Fall Craft Fair
Woman’s Literary Union
19 Elm St. Auburn
9am - 2pm
FB.com/WomansLiteraryUnion
Holiday Craft Fair
Lisbon High School
2 Sugg Dr. Lisbon
9am - 3pm
Bad Beer Bash
Craft Brew Underground
34 Court St. Auburn
1pm
FB.com/CBUAuburn
Episode 272
november 8
Bates College Football vs.
Hamilton
Garcelon Field
144 Central Ave. Lewiston
12pm
GoBatesBobcats.com
60th Annual Ski Swap
Lost Valley
200 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn
4pm
FB.com/AuburnSkiAssociation
Homecoming Dance &
Coat Drive
Franco Center
46 Cedar St. Lewiston
6pm
FrancoCenter.org
Crosshair
Gritty McDuff’s
72 Main St. Auburn
7:30pm - 10:30pm
FB.com/CrosshairMaine
Send us your events for December by November 23. Call 207.783.7039 or email billing@LydiaMediaLLC.com

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Sponsored by:
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november 11
Honoring Veterans
Lewiston-Auburn Veterans
Council
Veterans Memorial Park
2 Main St. Lewiston
10am
Email Marketing That
Works
LA Metro Chamber
415 Lisbon St. Lewiston
10am
LAMetroCC.com
november 15
Veterans Breakfast &
Lunch
L-A Harley Davidson
839 Main St. Lewiston
8:30am - 2pm
L-AHarley.com
Fall Artisan and Craft Fair
Lewiston Armory
65 Central Ave. Lewiston
10am - 3pm
FB.com/LewistonRecreation-
Maine
november 20
Horror Book Club
Lewiston Public Library
200 Lisbon St. Lewiston
5:30pm
LPLonline.org
november 21
Movement at the Museum -
African Drumming
Maine MILL
35 Canal St. Lewiston
5pm
MaineMILL.org
november 13
Brewing Connections
Schooner Estates
200 Stetson Rd. Auburn
7:30am
LAMetroChamber.com
CMCC Men’s Basketball
vs. NHTI
Central Maine Community
College
1250 Turner St. Auburn
8pm
CMMustangs.com
november 14
Veterans Luncheon
The Green Ladle
156 East Ave. Lewiston
Noon - 2pm
AuburnExchangeClub.com
Wicked Funny Laugh Off
Lost Valley
200 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn
7pm
GreatFallsComedyClub.com
november 14-15
Maine Nordiques vs.
Maryland Black Bears
Norway Savings Bank Arena
985 Turner St. Auburn
Fri-7:30pm, Sat-1pm
FB.com/TheMaineNordiques
november 15
Hoops for Hallie
Poland Regional High School
1457 Maine St. Poland
8am - 6pm
KindnessKeepersForHallie.org
Daniel Tiger’s Grriffic
Literacy Tour
Lewiston Public Library
200 Lisbon St. Lewiston
11am
LPLonline.org
LVCP Show Ball
Lost Valley
200 Lost Valley Rd. Auburn
6pm
FB.com/LVCPMaine
Cryin’ Out Loud
The Cage
99 Ash St. Lewiston
7pm - 11pm
FB.com/CryinOutLoudMaine
november 18
Hilton Holiday Hangout
Hilton Garden Inn Auburn
Riverwatch
14 Great Falls Plaza, Auburn
4pm - 7pm
FB.com/CityofAuburnMaine
november 19
Acoustic Open Mic
Olive Pit Brewing
16 Main St. Lisbon Falls
6pm - 9pm
FB.com/OlivePitBrewing
november 20
Survivor Storytellers
Group
Safe Voices
100 Lisbon St. Lewiston
5pm
FB.com/SafeVoicesMaine
november 22
Crystal Vision, Fleetwood
Mac Tribute
Franco Center
46 Cedar St. Lewiston
7pm
FrancoCenter.org
november 23
Amazing Pie Auction
East Auburn Baptist Church
610 Park Ave. Auburn
1pm
FB.com/SaltandLightCommunityCenter
november 25
Uplift LA Finest Under 40
Celebration
Hilton Garden Inn Auburn
Riverwatch
14 Great Falls Plaza, Auburn
5pm
UpliftLAMaine.com
november 27
Thanksgiving Buffet
Hilton Garden Inn Auburn
Riverwatch
14 Great Falls Plaza, Auburn
11am
FB.com/HGIAuburnRiverwatch
november 28-29
Lewiston Maineiacs vs.
Woodstock
The Colisee
190 Birch St. Lewiston
Fri-7:30pm, Sat-7pm
LewistonMaineiacsHockey.com
ALL KIDS
$15
Fri, Dec 12 @ 7pm
Sat, Dec 13 @ 2pm & 7pm
Sun, Dec 14 @ 2pm
Perfect for the whole family,
six actors and a fiddler
perform the Dickens out of
this beloved holiday story told
in a way you’ve never imagined
and will never forget!
GREAT GIFTS!
Fill the stockings of the theatrelovers
in your life, or anyone you
want to share the magic of live
theater with.
Give Subscriptions, tickets to
any show, or a Gift Certificate
so they can choose.
Maybe Santa will leave a gift in
YOUR stocking, too!
Isn’t it time you visited
The Public Theatre?
ThePublicTheatre.org
(207) 782-3200
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 35
31 Maple Street, Lewiston

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Uncle Andy’s Digest
36 November 2025
I try to be a good person but then someone pulls out in front of me
doing 10 below the speed limit and I have to try again tomorrow.

BUSINESS
SP TLIGHT
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Sometimes, when my dog barks, I’ll bark back.
Then he looks confused as to why I changed the subject.
Zane Deletetsky
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com 37

Directory of Advertisers
AUTOMOTIVE
Armand’s Auto Body............................C
armandsautobody.com
Dick's Auto Body................................ 26
207.225-5012
Poisson & Sons Auto Care................ 23
207.782.9144
Ron’s Transmission............................ 30
207.375.492
BANKING SERVICES
Community Credit Union....................C
communitycreditunion.com
Dirigo Federal Credit Union............ 31
dirigofcu.com
Otis Federal Credit Union................ 17
207.879.0900
Great Falls Credit Union....................C
207.782.7192
CLEANING PROFESSIONALS
Bin There Dump That.......................15
207.2240337
Collaborative Cleaners......................37
207.713.1550
Emerald Janitorial..............................30
EmeraldJanitorialServices.com
Simply Clean ME LLC.......................14
207.370.7244
CONSTRUCTION & EXCAVATION
Dionne Construction........................... 23
207.754.6436
General Concrete Cutting Services. BC
207.783.1027
Hird Contracting................................ 14
207.754.2343
DENTISTS & DENTURES
Smile Again Dentures.......................... 4
SmileAgainDentures.com
EDUCATION/BUSINESS SERVICES
Barclay's Skindivers Paradise........... 28
207.784.7300
LA Metro Chamber of Commerce.... 13
lametrochamber.com
Main Street Music Lessons................ 22
207.376.3376
ELECTRICAL
DeBlois Electric, Inc.......................... 12
debloiselectric.com
ENTERTAINMENT
Franco Center......................................29
francocenter.org
Great Falls Comedy Club.................. 23
www.greatfallscomedyclub.com
Just-in-Time Recreation................... 26
JustInTimeBowl.com
Uncle Andy’s Digest
38 Maine November Nordiques.................................. 2025
12
FB.com/Themainenordiques
Sea 40 Japanese Cuisine.................... 16
sea40me.com
William J. Rogers Post #153...........11
207.782.1118
FINANCIAL SERVICES
Great Falls Credit Union....................C
207.782.7192
Investment Concepts.........................15
207.784.5171
Michael G. Spaulding........................ 30
207.782.1040
Modern Woodmen of America...3, 16
modern-woodmen.org
Otis Federal Credit Union................ 17
www.otisfcu.coop
FOOD & BEVERAGE
Bourque's Market............................... 30
207.782.1385
Dad's Place............................................ 5
dadsplacemaine.com
Firehouse Grill................................... BC
firehouseauburn.com
George’s Pizza.....................................37
georgespizza.com
Gipper’s................................................15
gippers.com
Gourmet Popcorn............................... 27
207.784.0098
GridIron Restaurant.......................... 10
gridironrestaurant.com
Hoppers Restaurant........................... 32
207.784.9773
KP's Place............................................31
207.376.4295
Nonesuch..............................................14
207.998.5008
Mac’s Grill............................................. 2
MacsGrill.com
Pat’s Pizza Auburn.............................. 28
patsauburn.com
Rolly's Diner.......................................26
87 Mill St. Auburn
Roopers Beverage & Redemption...39
roopersbeverage.com
Roy’s Foodland....................................32
ShopAtRoysFoodland.com
Sea 40 Japanese Cuisine.................... 16
sea40me.com
Thatcher's.............................................. 9
207.782.2135
The Village Inn-Auburn.................... 18
villageinnmaine.com
C - front cover | IFC - inside front cover
BC - back cover | IBC - inside back cover
GIFT GUIDE
2 Brothers Tile........................................26
207.212.3348
Barclay’s Skindivers Paradise........... 28
207.784.7300
Blais Esthetics.....................................27
207.225.2346
Blais Flowers.......................................27
207.783.8566
Bob's Peanuts......................................28
207.783.1731
Dick's Auto Body................................ 26
207.225-5012
Erin Dunbar - Travel Agent............. 27
207.329.8517
Gourmet Popcorn............................... 27
207.784.0098
Just-in-Time Recreation................... 26
JustInTimeBowl.com
ME Massage Therapy........................ 28
memassagetherapy.com
Pat’s Pizza Auburn.............................. 28
patsauburn.com
Thoughtful Giving............................. 28
thoughtfulgiving.org
Republic Jewelry................................. 26
207.784.4444
Rolly's Diner.......................................26
HEALTH & WELLNESS
Andwell Health Partners................... 30
andwell.org
Central Maine Audiology................. 16
207.640.2609
Essence Wellness Spa LLC............... 22
essencewellnessspa.com
Happy Haven....................................... 11
happyhaven.info
Little Dragon......................................32
207.531.5346
ME Massage Therapy........................ 28
memassagetherapy.com
Maine Mobile CPR............................ 30
207.330.0322
Modern Woodmen of America...3, 16
modern-woodmen.org
Red Maple Audiology........................32
207.224.0222
Seniors Plus.........................................31
207.795.4010
HEATING & PLUMBING
Heat Pumps of Maine.........................C
heatpumpsofmaine.com
Pro-Tech Refrigeration..................... 31
pro-techrefrigeration.com

United Piping Heating & Plumbing...... 9
207.754.4556
Strong Propane...................................22
strongpropaneservices.com
HOME IMPROVEMENT
2 Brothers Tile........................................26
207.212.3348
Easy Self Storage..................................8
207.777.5700
General Concrete Cutting Services..BC
207.783.1027
Gutter Brothers...................................31
207.240.4048
Upfront Home Inspections............... 18
207.619.0868
Got Bugs Pest Services LLC............37
207.242.4988
Sturdy Hardware.................................19
207.375.6253
INSURANCE
Champoux Insurance......................... 17
888.983.2246
Lisa Laliberte-State Farm................... 6
207.783.3332
John Blanchette NFP Insurance...... 18
207.784.9358
Richard Moylan-Allstate................... 37
207.777.0050
MISCELLANEOUS
GA Humane Society.......................... 21
gahumane.org/pawitforward/
Your local guide to... well, just about anything!
Happy Haven.......................................11
happyhaven.info
LA Chamber of Commerce.............. 13
lametrochamber.com
Lewiston Live Podcst......................... 31
lametrochamber.com
Thoughtful Giving.............................28
thoughtfulgiving.org
William J. Rogers Post #153...........11
207.782.1118
YMCA............................................. 20,21
207.795.4095
PRINT & PROMOTIONAL
Coastal T-Shirts....................................6
coastaltshirts.com
Evergreen Custom Printing.............30
207.782.0525
WIGY Radio.......................................33
wigyradio.com
REAL ESTATE
Debbie Bodwell-Guild Mortgage..... BC
207.754.3962
Dubois Realty............................... 20,21
duboisrealtygroup.net
Maine Real Estate Experience........ 37
themainerealstateexperience.com
Maine Source Realty..........................10
mainesourcehomes.com
RECREATION
Barclay’s Skindivers Paradise........... 28
207.784.7300
East Auburn Pools.............................. 19
207.713.5384
Erin Dunbar - Travel Agent............. 27
207.329.8517
Main Street Music Lessons................ 22
207.376.3376
REDEMPTION CENTERS
Coach Terry’s Redemption Center....30
207.225.2008
Roopers Beverage & Redemption.....39
roopersbeverage.com
Dad's Place............................................5
dadsplacemaine.com
RETIREMENT
Modern Woodmen of America...3, 16
modern-woodmen.org
The Chapman House
Assisted Living ....................................7
207.783.0961
Seniors Plus.........................................31
207.795.4010
The Meadows Senior Living............19
207.946.3007
SPORTING GOODS
Barclay’s Skindivers Paradise...............28
207.784.7300
Fine Line Gun Shop........................... 31
207.998.2374
G3 Firearms.........................................17
G3Firearms.com
“A reliable employee is every leader’s
greatest gift”- Many words come to mind
when Billy’s name comes up.
Reliable, trustworthy, dependable just to
name a few.
Billy started in the redemption center for
Roopers in September, 2020.
With his hard work and commitment, he
quickly moved over to the retail side of
Rooper’s.
He brings a happy, fun and exciting
attitude to Rooper’s on a daily basis and
makes the customers smile with his quick
wit and charm.
Billy Longley
MINOT AVE SUPER STAFF
ROOPERSBEVERAGE.COM
We are lucky to have such a devoted
employee and we look forward to many
more years!
-Jesse Lavoie, Minot Ave Manager
545 Minot Ave., Auburn | 783.2047
980 Main St., Oxford | 539.6072
Uncle Andy’s Digest
794 Sabattus UncleAndys.com
St., Lewiston | 783.6353 39
686 Main St., Lewiston | 344.1200

Equal Housing Opportunity
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WWW.NMLSCONSUMERACCESS.ORG
November Drink Specials
$ 10
10
$ 8
Monday - Saturday 11a-9p
Pumpkin
Pie Martini
Closed Thanksgiving Day
$2 off dine-in burgers every Monday
Coz y
Campfire
207-376-4959 • 47 Broad Street, Auburn • www.firehouseauburn.com
Your local guide to... well, just about anything!
UncleAndys.com
Uncle Andy’s Digest
UncleAndys.com
40 November 2025