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ME ME 04240 04062

throp, 207-407-7576

207-786-3612

Ted n, im n, ME Heidrich* Pelkey* 04240

ME 04364

Winthrop, 207-357-5429

Lewiston,

Matthew Ted Heidrich* ME 04240

mothers, for all

Matthew Richard

Nadeau*

Ron 207-576-3426

Stacy Ouellette*

207-407-7576 Nadeau*

Ron Ouellette*

Kim Pelkey*

Seth Vlahakos*

Lewiston, 04240

Winthrop,

Fortin

ME 04364

Lewiston, Paul Gagne*

Lewiston, 395-5177

ME 04240

Lewiston, -3622 ME 04240

207-786-3612

Winthrop, Seth Vlahakos*

Kim Ted Heidrich* Pelkey* ME 04364

Lewiston, Matthew ME Nadeau*

04240

Ron Ouellette*

you do.

6-5656

* Registered ME 04240 representative. Seth Kim Vlahakos*

Windham,

Securities Pelkey* offered Lewiston, Courtemanche

Kim Pelkey*

through 04364 04062

Lewiston,

MWA Rumford, ME 04240 04276

owned subsidiary of

207-576-5656

07-786-2573

207-576-5656

Registered representative. Securities 207-395-5177

Windham, ME ME ME

04240

04062

Seth Vlahakos*

* Registered representative. 207-395-5177 Securities offered through MWA Financial Services 207-786-3612

ties offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., ME offered Lewiston,

Lewiston, a wholly owned

through ME

ME

04240

04240 subsidiary of

MWA Financial Services Seth

207-395-5177

Windham, Winthrop, Seth Inc., a Vlahakos*

wholly owned 04364

subsidiary of

* Registered representative. Securities offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly

Inc., 207-357-5429 a Vlahakos*

207-786-3612

Lewiston, ME 04240

ies offered through MWA Financial

207-786-2573

207-407-7576

Modern Woodmen of Windham, America.

wholly owned subsidiary of

Lewiston, Member: 207-786-3612

ME

207-786-2573

ME 04062 04240 FINRA, SIPC

207-576-3426

207-407-7576

ME owned

ME

04062 subsidiary of

Modern Woodmen Services Inc., of America. a wholly Member: owned FINRA, subsidiary SIPC of

ember: FINRA, SIPC Modern Woodmen of America. 207-576-5656 Member: FINRA, SIPC

207-395-5177

Windham, ME 04062

207-786-3612

mber: FINRA, SIPC

Modern Woodmen of America. Member: 207-786-3622

207-786-2573

207-407-7576

FINRA, SIPC

Windham, 207-407-7576

ME 04062

207-407-7576

207-786-2573

elkey*

207-407-7576

* Registered representative. Seth Kim Vlahakos*

Securities Pelkey* offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of

ton, ME 04240

Registered representative. Securities offered through MWA Financial Services Seth Inc., Vlahakos*

Modern Woodmen of Windham, America.

wholly owned subsidiary of

Lewiston, Member: ME ME 04062 04240 FINRA, SIPC

drich*

86-2573

Modern Woodmen Matthew of America. Nadeau*

Member: FINRA, SIPC

Ron Windham, Ouellette* ME 04062

n, ME 04240

Winthrop, 207-407-7576

207-786-2573

Kim Ted Heidrich* Pelkey* ME 04364

Lewiston,

Matthew

207-407-7576 ME 04240

e. lkey* Kim Vlahakos*

Securities Pelkey* offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of

Seth Vlahakos* Nadeau*

Ron Ouellette*

e.

Lewiston, -5656 Securities offered through MWA * Financial Services

ME 04240

207-395-5177

Seth Inc., Lewiston, dham, erica. Member: ME 04062 FINRA, SIPC

wholly ME owned 04240

subsidiary of

207-786-3612

Windham, Winthrop, a of

* Registered representative. Seth Kim Vlahakos*

Securities Pelkey* offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly Registered owned subsidiary of

ME 04240

ME 04364 04062

of

Lewiston, ME 04240

erica. Member: FINRA, SIPC

representative. of Securities offered ME through MWA Financial Services Seth Inc., Vlahakos*

Modern Woodmen of America.

wholly owned subsidiary of

Windham, of 207-786-2573

Lewiston, Member:

207-576-5656

ME ME 04062 04240 FINRA, SIPC

207-395-5177

ME 207-786-2573

407-7576 -2573

Modern Woodmen of America. Member: FINRA, SIPC

207-407-7576

Windham, ME 04062

207-786-3612

207-407-7576

207-786-2573

207-407-7576

A

*

Financial

Registered

Services

representative.

Inc., a wholly

Securities

owned

offered

subsidiary

through MWA

of

Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of

Modern Woodmen of * Registered America. representative. Member: FINRA, Securities SIPC

rities offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned

offered

subsidiary

through MWA

of

Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of

Modern Woodmen of America. Member: FINRA, SIPC

Member: FINRA, SIPC

lkey*

* Registered representative. Seth Kim Vlahakos*

Securities Pelkey* offered through MWA Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of

n, e.

a wholly

Securities ME 04240 owned

offered

subsidiary

through MWA Seth Vlahakos*

Modern * of

Financial

Woodmen Services Inc.,

of Windham, America. a wholly owned Lewiston, Member: ME ME 04062

subsidiary

04240 FINRA, SIPC

of

a of

ities erica. offered Member: through FINRA, MWA *

SIPC Financial

Registered -2573

Mother Services representative. Inc., of to a a wholly

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advice: of of Financial Services Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of

Cook a man Windham, fish ME and 04062

Modern Woodmen of America. Member: FINRA, SIPC

you feed him for a day.

ember: FINRA, SIPC

207-407-7576

207-786-2573

But teach a man to fish and you get 207-407-7576 rid of him for the whole weekend.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 3


Hairy Situation

Harry is driving down

a highway, and he

hits and kills a rabbit.

He gets out of the

car and walks over

to the rabbit. Harry

picks it up and starts

crying, thinking he’s

a horrible person.

Someone else

driving down the

highway stops and

walks over to him,

and asks, “What

happened?” Harry

replies, “I hit this

rabbit with my car

and now it’s dead!”

I wish my gray hair started in Las Vegas because what happens in Vegas,

stays in Vegas.

Smile Again

Dentures

Like our name implies,

We’ll

help you

smile again!

The stranger gets

a thoughtful look

on their face and

goes back to their

car. They rummage

around in the trunk,

and eventually walk

back over to the

man holding a spray

bottle. They spray

the rabbit with the

bottle, and it comes

back to life.

It starts hopping

away, turning back

every few hops to

wave at the two

people. Harry,

astounded, turns to

the other person and

asks, “What was in

that bottle?”

• Full Dentures • Immediate Dentures • Partial Dentures

• Rebases • Relines • Repairs

The stranger replies,

“It’s hare spray.”

Cassandra

Gagnon, LD

Joe

Adkins, LD

Mike

Adkins, LD

Licensed Denturists

801 Webster Street, Lewiston | 514-0660

SmileAgainDentures.com | smileagaindentures@gmail.com

Uncle Andy’s Digest

4 May 2026

Can February March? No, but April May!

23 P


There’s No Place Like...

YOUR ONE-STOP SHOP

Hot & Ready Meals

Grab ‘n’ Go!

Order ahead,

grab 'n' go, or

sit and eat!

Agency Liquor Store

& Beer Cave

Located in the building behind Dad’s Place

REDEMPTION CENTER

6 ¢

on all 5¢ returns with this coupon

Hours: Wednesday - Sunday 9am - 5pm

(closed Mondays, Tuesdays, & Major Holidays)

(must present coupon at Redemption Center prior to counting)

UAD exp. 05.31.26

Ice Cream Shop

$ 1.00 OFF

$ 1.00 OFF ANY SIZE ICE CREAM

(must present coupon at the time of purchase)

UAD exp. 03.31.26

UAD exp. 05.31.26

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 5

23 Pleasant Street, Mechanic Falls | dadsplacemaine.com | 207-345-5551



How many moms does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One, obviously, and she has to do it or else it won’t get done.

CUSTOMER

SERVICE

FOR THE TRADES

PROGRAM

REGISTRATION

Out and About

at Nonesuch

River Brewing

Oxford Chamber’s

Night Out

Check out our

sick swag!

Ally Logan

May 2nd and June 6th

Pre-Registration available

In Person Course at

1250 Turner Street, Auburn, ME 04210

Central Maine Community College.

FREE

TRAINING

PROGRAM DETAILS

In the skilled trades, technical ability alone is not enough to stand out. Exceptional

customer service sets you apart and drives long-term success. How you communicate,

respond, and engage with customers directly shapes your reputation.

Join us for Customer Service for the Trades at Central Maine Community College and

strengthen your customer interaction skills in a single session—at no cost to participants.

In this interactive training, you will learn how to:

Create positive, professional customer experiences

Communicate clearly and respectfully

Respond effectively to customer needs

Build relationships that lead to repeat business and referrals

PREREQUISITES

At least 18 years of age

High School diploma, GED or HiSet

U.S. Citizenship and work authorization

GRANT FUNDING

PROVIDED BY

Stan Bennett

This meal is

great! 5 Stars!

Central Maine Community College does not discriminate and is an equal opportunity/affirmative action employer.

For more information, please call 207-755-5396 or email humanresources@cmcc.edu.

Alison Bennett

Which state has the most streets? Rhode Island.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 7


Out and About

at Nonesuch

River Brewing

Oxford Chamber’s

Night Out

RIP boiling water, you will be mist.

Let Our Team Help You

Buy or Sell This Summer

That Out & About

guy is everywhere!

The Season

to Buy + Sell

Starts Now

Jon

Mercier

Lindsay

Wright

Mark

Turner

Brandon

Caruso

Deb

Morin

Malayka

Harriman

Linda

Dupuis

List in May →

Move in Summer

Dustin

Mallar

Paige

Landry

Valerie

Landry

Jacey Goodrich

Design-Build, Turn-Key Packages,

Single or Multi-Level Homes, One Loan.

(No Construction Loans Needed in Most Cases)

207.333.6001

368 Minot Avenue, Auburn

mainesourcehomes.com

LET OUR ADVERTISERS KNOW YOU SAW THEM IN THE DIGEST!

DON’T TAKE CHANCES-

TRUST THE PROFESSIONALS.

Jeff Gambardella &

Cyndi Robbins

Long Distance

My girlfriend and I are

trying this whole "long

distance relationship"

thing.

I have to stay 100 feet

away from her at all

times.

OUR FULLY LICENSED SERVICE

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Electrical Repairs & Upgrades

Also, the police say I

should stop referring

to her as my girlfriend.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

8 May 2026

Why do some couples go to the gym together?

Because they want their relationship to work out.


No one does it like Mac’s

Maine’s #1 steakhouse for a reason.

Where the locals eat!

Come in and watch

your favorite

baseball team on 11

TV’s in our bar!

Not a bad seat in

the house.

Go Red Sox

Ask About Our Daily Specials,

They Really Are Special!

Ask us about

our new

Coaster

Club!

All of our desserts

are made in house!

Let Mac’s Cater Your Next Event!

Weddings, Banquets, Birthdays, Corporate Parties, & more!

No event too BIG or SMALL... We cater it ALL!

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 9

1052 Minot Avenue, Auburn • 783-6885 • MacsGrill.com


Time Tells

A fellow named John

was walking along a

country road when

he came upon a

farmer working in his

field.

John called out to

the farmer, "How

long will it take me

to get to the next

town?"

The farmer didn't

answer. The guy

waited a bit and

then started walking

again.

I asked my dog what's two minus two. He said nothing.

Join Us for the NEJA

Summer Hunter/Jumper

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Riding Lessons • Sales & Leasing • Events

195 Webster Rd. Lisbon, ME • 207-514-6626 • sassystrideseq.com

After the man

had gone about a

hundred yards, the

farmer yelled out

"About 20 minutes!"

"Thank you. But why

didn't you tell me

that when I asked

you?"

"Didn't know how

fast you could walk".

Stranded

A cruise ship

passes by a remote

island, and all the

passengers see

a bearded man

running around and

waving his arms

wildly. “Captain,”

one passenger asks,

“who is that man

over there?” “I have

no idea,” the captain

says, “but he goes

nuts every year

when we pass him.”

We have everything you need for

yard clean-up & maintenence!

Get it done right with our rentals!

186 Sabattus Road, Sabattus, ME • (207) 375-6253

2 Miles Off I-95 Exit 86 Family Owned & Operated

Uncle Andy’s Digest

10 May 2026

What do you call a well-balanced horse? Stable.


Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

OPEN FOR THE SEASON

• Restaurant

• Mini Golf Course

• Driving Range

• Ice Cream Stand

Out and About

at Nonesuch

River Brewing

Oxford Chamber’s

Night Out

What a nice

night out!

Treat Mom to a family FUN day

this Mother’s Day!

SPRING HOURS

Miniature Golf &

Driving Range

Open Daily 10am-8pm

(weather permitting)

Restaurant & Ice Cream Stand

Closed at 7pm on rainy days

Open Daily 11am-8pm

470 Lake Shore Drive Auburn • tabersgolf.com

Chelsea Dickinson

LET OUR ADVERTISERS KNOW YOU SAW THEM IN THE DIGEST!

ABC POOL & SPA CENTER

SALES - INSTALLATION - MAINTENANCE

Rowan Cayer

CHEERS!

Family Owned & Operated

For Over 60 Years

Route 196 | ABCPOOL.COM Call or Text Today!

1975 Lisbon Street, Lewiston 207-783-0858

Shea Cusick

Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 11


Taxi!

A taxi passenger

tapped the driver on

the shoulder to ask

him a question.

The driver screamed,

lost control of the car,

nearly hit a bus, went

up on the footpath,

and stopped inches

from a shop window.

For a second, everything

was quiet in the

cab. Then the driver

said, "Look, mate,

don't ever do that

again. You scared the

living daylights out of

me!"

The passenger

apologized and said,

"I didn't realize that a

little tap would scare

you so much."

The driver replied,

"Sorry, it's not really

your fault. Today is

my first day as a cab

driver — I've been

driving a funeral van

for the last 25 years."

Honest Boss

My boss was honest

with me today.

He pulled up to work

with his sweet new

car this morning and I

complimented him on

it. He replied, "Well,

if you work hard, set

goals, stay determined

and put in long

hours, I can get an

even better one next

year."

What does a spy do when he’s cold? He goes undercover.

ATTN: FOOD TRUCKS-

Need A Kitchen?

Rent Our Commercial Kitchen

Flexible Hours,

Affordable Rates, &

Convenient Location.

GREENHOUSE & GARDEN CENTER

Open: Sat-Wed 8am-4pm, Thurs-Fri 8am-6pm

896 Lawrence Rd. No. Pownal • 207-688-4462

www.GardenSpotFarm.com

Open house

Mother’s Day Weekend

May 9th & 10th - Giveaways & Prizes!

10

greenhouses

filled with annuals,

perennials, herb &

vegetable plants,

& hanging baskets

Trees & Shrubs (May)

Asparagus &

Strawberry Roots

Seed Potato • Seeds

Fruit Trees • Plants

Check out our store filled with gardening tools, pots, and more!

Striving to invigorate hope,

bringing dreams to life.

Providing Direct Support To Maine Adults With Intellectual Disabilities.

WE ARE LOOKING FOR

A FITNESS TRAINER/YOGA INSTRUCTOR

(one day a month for a couple of hours)

Light Cardiovascular Heart Health, Flexibility,

Muscle Strength, Posture, Joint Health, and Circulation

Our services can be very rewarding

in doing good for others.

• Dark bark

• Mulch

• Loam

• Organic compost

• 50/50 Compost/Loam

Call ahead for

bulk deliveries

LET OUR ADVERTISERS KNOW YOU SAW THEM IN THE DIGEST!

Be part of something where others can give your

life new meaning.

happyhaven.info | 134 Main St. Suite 1 & 2, Lewiston | Phone- 207-241-0274 | Fax- 207-241-7280

Uncle Andy’s Digest

12 May 2026

What did the drummer name her twin daughters? Anna 1, Anna 2.


Why is a computer so smart? Because it listens to its motherboard.

The Chapman House

Out and About

at Nonesuch

River Brewing

Oxford Chamber’s

Night Out

Home for senior ladies

Providing a warm

& comfortable home

for our residents.

Becky Kuvaja

The Purpose of life is to be useful, to be honorable, and to

be compassionate. Our residents have made a difference,

they have lived and live well.

Wishing All Mother’s A Happy Mother’s Day

- From The Chapman House

Bill Kuvaja

Where’d

my drink go?!

The Chapman House has private rooms available

for residents, aged 65 and older, who need

assistance with bathing, medications, and meals.

41 Pleasant Street, Auburn | 207-783-0961

Bonnie Iwans

Steve Simard

What kind of flowers are best for Mother’s Day? Mums.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 13


Heaven's Gate

A man died and went

to Heaven.

St Peter says to him

“Before you meet

with God, I should

tell you, we’ve looked

over your life, and to

be honest you really

didn’t do anything

particularly good or

bad. We’re not really

sure what to do with

you. Can you tell us

anything you did that

can help us make a

decision?”

The newly arrived

soul thought for a

moment and replied,

“Yeah, once I was

driving along and

came upon a little old

lady who was being

harassed by a group

of thugs. So I pulled

over and went up

to the leader of the

thugs. He was a big,

muscular guy with a

ring pierced through

his lip. Well, I tore the

ring out of his lip, and

told him he and his

gang had better stop

bothering this lady or

they would have to

deal with me!”

“Wow that’s impressive,

said Peter.

“When did this

happen?”

About three minutes

ago,” came the reply.

Wanna hear a joke about construction? I'm still workin' on it!

2026

BOOKING NOW

*Financing Available*

We Provide:

✓ Inground Pool Installations

✓Aboveground Pool Installations

✓ Existing Pool Renovations

✓ Liner Replacements

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✓ Leak Detection

✓ Seasonal Openings & Closings

From New Builds to

Backyard Transformations-

We Handle Every Aspect In-House

EastAuburnPoolsAndServices.com | 207-713-5384 | EastAuburnPools@Yahoo.com

• BRAKES

• TIRES

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ENTER FOR A CHANCE TO

WIN A GIFT CERTIFICATE

FROM ONE OF OUR

LOCAL ADVERTISERS!

It’s Spring

Car Care Time!

LEWISTON/AUBURN’S FULL SERVICE REPAIR FACILITY

1122 Center Street, Auburn | www.mikemorinsauto.com | 207-753-0433

Uncle Andy’s Digest

14 May 2026

I'm thinking I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.


What's the difference between a man's wallet before and after kids?

There are pictures where the money used to be.

Fill the Plate

Breakfast

to benefit

Meals on

Wheels

Friday, May 15

7-9 a.m.

Hilton Auburn

JOIN US!

Featuring a keynote by Katie Zarrilli,

a Maine storyteller known

for capturing the voices,

experiences, and

spirit of communities

across the state.

Honoring Stan Wheeler

and Old South Church

of Farmington with the Ikaria Award

for improving the lives of older adults.

$35 per person/$40 at the door

For info or tickets, call 795-4010 or

visit seniorsplus.org/fill-the-plate

Sponsorship opportunities still available!

Out and About

at Gritty’s

Auburn

Farewell Party for

Shanna Cox

Shanna we’ll miss

you! Best of luck

on your campaign!

Kayla Bartlett

LET OUR ADVERTISERS KNOW YOU SAW THEM IN THE DIGEST!

THE AMERICAN LEGION

FAMILY

Members & Guests Welcome!

AMERICAN LEGION ACT

Veterans who were honorably discharged

but whose service did not fall into previously

defined war eras may now join

the American Legion immediately. The

eligibility now spans from Dec. 7, 1941,

until a time when the U.S. is no longer at

war, as determined by Congress.

71 South Main St, Auburn • 207-782-1118

HOURS: Monday - Thursday: 12pm-8pm

Friday: 12pm-11pm • Saturday: 12pm-9pm • Sunday: 11am-6pm

RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on Fridays and get a surprise!

“SEE YOU AT THE POST!” MUSIC, KARAOKE & DANCE w/ JEAN LOUIS!

FRIDAYS 7-11pm in May

Jerry Joe - May 1st, 15th, 29th • 4:30 - 6:30pm

MAY 2ND - 3PM KENTUCKY DERBY 152 ND

Drink Specials: Mint Juleps & Mojitos

Pot Luck • Games • Best Hat • Best Dressed • Photos

COME FOR THE RACE, STAY FOR THE FUN

Matt Nash

RED SHIRT FRIDAYS: Wear your red shirt on

Fridays and get a surprise! “SEE YOU AT THE POST!”

For Veteran or Community services, call

207-782-1118 or 207-873-3229

MAY 10TH - Happy Mother’s Day

MAY 25TH - HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY

MONTHLY MEETING WEDNESDAY, MAY 20TH 2026

LEGION MEMBERS IN ATTENDANCE HAVE A CHANCE TO WIN $ 100, $ 50, OR $ 25

Executive Committee 6pm | General Meeting 7pm

No Dinner in May

Chris Hanks

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 15


Flat Tire

Four high school boys

afflicted with spring

fever skipped morning

classes. After lunch

they reported to the

teacher that they had

a flat tire. Much to

their relief she smiled

and said, “Well, you

missed a test today

so take seats apart

from one another and

take out a piece of

paper.” Still smiling,

she waited for them

to sit down. Then she

said: “First Question:

Which tire was flat?”

Why did the magicians in class get the best grades on their test?

They got all of the trick questions right.

STAY POWERED. STAY PREPARED.

RELIABLE PROPANE DELIVERY

& GENERATOR SOLUTIONS

YOU CAN COUNT ON.

FiNANCiNG OPTiONS NOW AVAiLABLE

Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged!

You Can’t Go Wrong

When You Call Strong!

Are you prepared

for SUMMER

HOMEBUYING?

Call me today to get started!

(207) 576-7943 | 250 Center St. Auburn, Ste 205 | jlaplante@usa-mortgage.com

Book Your Spring Cleaning Today!

Carpets • Upholstery • Tile & Grout

+ Area Rug Cleaning!

Commercial & Residential

(207) 783-2933 | 227 East Ave, Lewiston | collinscarpetcleaning.com

Time Off

An employee asks his

boss, “Can I have two

weeks off for

Christmas?”

His boss replied, “It’s

May…”, to which the

employee responded,

“Oh, sorry."

"May I have two weeks

off for Christmas?”

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

Makes Starting Your

Campfire Fun & Easy!

PULSE FIRE COMPACT

Rt. 4 in Turner • Just past Twitchell’s Airport • 207-225-3432 • www.G3Firearms.com

Uncle Andy’s Digest

16 May 2026

“It’s spicy” is a universal mom code for “I don’t want to share.”


Why are oak trees so forgiving? Every spring they “turn over a new leaf”

JT Reid’s

Guns & Cigars

Grab a few cigars before

your next outing!

• Golf Tournaments

• Fishing Trips

• Father’s Day

• BBQ’s

Large selection of firearms,

ammo & accessories!

Always buying good used

firearms & collectibles

24 garfield Rd, Auburn | 207-777-3579 | jtreidsgunshop.com

Out and About

at Gritty’s

Auburn

Farewell Party for

Shanna Cox

Thank you all for

your support!!

Shanna Cox &

Jen Hogan

OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK!

YEAR ROUND!

723 Maine St.

Poland, Me

(207)998-5008

FULL MENU

FULL BAR - CRAFT BEER

Get $5 off your food

with this coupon!

Uncle Andys

gest

F

r proof

un as

es are

y

st

ount

ith

Residential Friendly Dumpsters

Bin Sizes:

Rent a

dumpster

for Spring

cleanup!

10 yd. bin - 10’ long x 7’ wide - 4’ high

14 yd. bin - 11’ long x 8’ wide - 4.5’ high

20 yd. bin - 11’ long x 8’ wide - 6’ high

What did 0 say to 8? “Nice belt.”

UAD APRIL 2025

Dispatch

Office: 207-224-0337

Cell: 207-212-0736

170 N. Daggett Hill Rd.

Greene, ME 04236

portlandme@bintheredumpthat.com

Our Residential Friendly Design Includes

Easy Load Double Rear Doors

Driveway Protection Boards

Dependable Friendly Service

207-224-0337

www.bintheredumpthatusa.com

Seth Vlahakos

Betsy Sibley

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 17


Coats

A businessman went

into the office and

found an inexperienced

handyman

painting the walls.

The handyman was

wearing two heavy

parkas on a hot summer

day.

Thinking this was

a little strange, the

businessman asked

the handyman why

he was wearing the

parkas on such a hot

day. The handyman

showed him the instructions

on the can

of paint. They read:

“For best results, put

on two coats.”

It's not easy being a mom. If it were easy, fathers would do it.

207-370-7244 | simplycleanme.com

contact@simplycleanme.com

• Highly-trained team

• Personalized checklist

People tell me I'm unapproachable. I tell them, "apparently, not enough."

Your business will

get the love &

care it needs from

people part of this

community, who

want to give back

to you!

$

10 for school

teachers

COURSE NOW OPEN!

Book Your Tee-Time Today!

Hoppers Hours: M-F 4-9pm | Sat & Sun 12-9pm

316 Pinewoods Rd, Lewiston, ME | 207-784-9773 | www.Applevalleyme.com

207.240.4048

Call NOW for a

FREE NO OBLIGATION

Estimate.

We Are Fully Insured.

Locally Owned.

Corey@gutterbrothersmaine.com

www.GutterBrothersMaine.com

Out and About

at Burnt Ends

I asked an electrician to fix a problem in my house. He re-fused

LA Metro Chamber

of Commerce

Breakfast

Danielle Petersdorf

Uncle Andy’s Digest

18 May 2026

My nickname is Mom. But my full name is “Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom.”


My boss calls me "the computer" ...mostly because I fall asleep if left

unattended for 15 minutes.

Professional Home

Maintenance &

Inspections

Mention Uncle Andy’s + get

$ 100 OFF

your fi rst maintenance!

Coverage for

Every Day

DIRTY SYSTEMS COST YOU MONEY $$$

CLEAN. MAINTAIN. BREATHE Easier.

Give Us A Call (207) 619-0868 • upfront-homeinspection.com

Discover insurance solutions from local industry experts

dedicated to protecting your assets. From risk consulting

to claims support, we help you protect what matters most.

John Blanchette, Sales Advisor | 207.784.9358

john.blanchette@nfp.com

For your business.

For your people.

For your life.

NFP.com

Did You

Know?

by Upfront Home

A dirty heat pump

can lose a significant

amount of efficiency.

Dust, debris, and

buildup on coils and

filters force the system

to work harder,

increasing energy use

and utility costs. Over

time, this added strain

can also shorten the

lifespan of your equipment.

Regular cleaning

and maintenance

help your heat pump

run more efficiently,

saving you money

and keeping your

home comfortable.

Out and About

at Burnt Ends

LA Metro Chamber

of Commerce

Breakfast

Copyright ©2024 NFP. All Rights Reserved.

681 Sabattus St., Lewiston, ME 04240

Join us for

Mother’s Day!

The Village Inn

Kristen Filbeck

Join us at Maine’s

Got Talent event!

Relax and let us do

the cooking for you!

Visit us on

207-782-7796 | 165 High Street, Auburn | villageinnmaine.com | Open Wednesday - Sunday

Leslie Ogilvie

I was going to start my diet today, but I've got too much on my plate.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 19


Uncle Andy’s Digest

20 May 2026


SCAN TO

REGISTER TODAY

alymca.org

9 Themed

Weeks

June 15 -

August 14

Ages

5 and up

SUMMER

CAMP

Financial aid

available for

qualifying

families

SUMMER

C

Spread across

95-acres, Y camp is

designed to foster the

emotional development,

physical wellbeing, and spiritual

awareness that comes from

interacting with nature and

socializing with peers.

A

M

YMCA OF

AUBURN-LEWISTON

SUMMER DAY CAMP AT OLEC

151 Stetson Road

Auburn, Maine, 04210

P

9-WEEK SUMMER

CAMP PROGRAM

for children

Age 5 to Grade 8

COUNSELOR-IN-TRAINING

CIT PROGRAM

for teens entering

Grades 9 + 10

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 21


Out and About

at Burnt Ends

LA Metro Chamber

of Commerce

Breakfast

I love being

caught on Out &

About!

A computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

WELCOME TO THE LA METRO CHAMBER

NEW MEMBERS!

Pine Tree Society

PineTreeSociety.org

207 Undercoating

207Undercoating.com

Portside Productions

PortsideProductions.com

Maine Street Business Consulting

MaineStreetBiz.com

Karen Shaw

415 LISBON STREET, LEWISTON • LAMETROCHAMBER.COM

LET OUR ADVERTISERS KNOW YOU SAW THEM IN THE DIGEST!

Amy Landry

Norm Karkos

Uncle Andy’s Digest

22 May 2026

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's intolerance.


Kacey J. LePage

Champoux Insurance Agency

I'm so bright that my mother calls me son.

Call Kacey for All Your

Personal Insurance Needs

"Kacey brings a thoughtful perspective and a

passion for guiding her clients through personal

insurance so they can feel confident and

protected in their everyday lives."

THE CHAMPOUX GROUP

CHAMPOUX • PEOPLES • PINKHAM • ROGERS

I N S U R A N C E

...Your Security is Our Main Concern!

150 East Ave. Lewiston, ME | 207-753-6204 (direct line) | 207-782-7881 (fax)

I'm at a point in my life when errands count as going out.

Kacey is a 10 year

volunteer/supporter

For Make A Wish,

Maine.

Stand Alone

"If there are any

idiots in the room,

will they please

stand up", said the

sarcastic teacher.

After a long silence,

one freshman rose

to his feet. "Now

then mister, why

do you consider

yourself an idiot?",

inquired the teacher

with a sneer.

"Well, actually I

don't," said the

student, "but I hate

to see you standing

up there all by

yourself."

Check out our new monthly

podcast produced with

Lydia Media

LIVE

Search “Lewiston Live”anywhere you listen to your favorite podcasts

We’ll discuss all things Lewiston with Lewiston’s

new City Administrator Bryan Kaenrath

(207) 241-7460

THE BIG DADDY

Breakfast & Lunch

served ALL DAY

Voted LA’s Best

Breakfast Place

LARGE order cater-style

to-go orders for staff/office.

Great Prices • Plenty of Parking

DAILY SPECIALS

Fast, friendly service

Mon. - Fri.: 6am - 2pm

Sat. & Sun. 6am - 1pm

767 Minot Ave. Auburn

$ 1.00 OFF

Valid Monday–Friday | One coupon per table.

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot during the day.

Muriel celebrated...

her 90th birthday with us

and can't wait for the next party!

The Meadows

See what we have to offer.

“Maine’s Most Affordable Senior Living Center”

Tour now—decide later.

A warm home-style assisted living center for self-sufficient seniors!

Availability starting at $1500 per month

#433 RT. 202, P.O. BOX 629, GREENE • 946-3007

Did you hear about the support group for people who talk too much?

It's called On and On Anon.

Snail Mail

Paul is sitting at home

when he hears a

knock at the door. He

opens the door and

sees a snail on the

porch. He picks up

the snail and throws it

as far as he can.

A year later, there’s

another knock at the

door. Paul opens it

and sees the same

snail. The snail says,

“What was that all

about?”

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 23


Out for a Drive

Brian was driving

down the road when

a policeman stopped

him.

The officer looked in

the back of Brian’s

truck and said, “Why

are these penguins in

your truck?”

Brian replied, “These

are my penguins.

They belong to me.”

“You need to take

them to the zoo,” the

policeman said.

The next day, the officer

saw Brian driving

down the road again.

He pulled him over

once again.

He saw the penguins

were still in the truck,

but they were wearing

sunglasses this time.

Why yes, I can carry on a conversation made up entirely of movie quotes.

Join us for our:

Mother’s Day Tea Party

All net proceeds go to Black Belts Against Domestic Violence

SATURDAY | MAY 9TH | 10AM-1PM

at Lydia Media - 2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B, Auburn

Bakery and beverage items served throughout event!

Food • Drinks • Photo Booth with Props

included in ticket price

Permanent Jewlery Station • Tarot Readings

priced seperately

Tickets: $10- Guests 21 + | $5- Guests Under 21

Purchase via Venmo or RSVP by May 7th if you'd like to pay at the door

10 free tickets available! Visit our Mother's Day Tea Party FB page to find out how to win!

My wife made coffee this morning and winked when she handed me the cup. I’ve never

been more scared of a drink in all of my life.

“I thought I told you to

take these penguins

to the zoo!”, the officer

said.

“I did,” Brian replied.

“And today I’m taking

them to the beach."

Uncle Andy’s Digest

24 May 2026

I saw a very small inmate climbing down the wall of a prison.

I thought to myself, "That's a little condescending.


Me: Are my blinkers working?

Dad: Yes, No, Yes, No.

Eligible for Medicare?

CALL US TODAY

to see which Medicare health plan best fits your needs.

30+

Years of

Experience!

Visit us at 184 Webster Street, Lewiston

When you dream in color is it a pigment of your imagination?

Careful Wishes

Three friends stranded

on a deserted island

find a magic lamp.

Inside it is a genie

who agrees to grant

each friend one wish.

“I want to go home,”

says the first friend.

The genie grants her

wish. “I want to go

home, too,” says the

second friend. And the

genie sends him back

home. “I’m lonely,”

says the third friend. “I

sure wish my friends

were back here."

ALL STEAK

HAMBURGERS

& GOLF CENTER

2514 TURNER RD. AUBURN

OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK

11AM - 8PM

MINI GOLF

DRIVING RANGE

BATTING CAGES

DISC GOLF

Famous Burgers , Hand-cut Fries,

Lobster Rolls,Ice Cream & More!

ROYSGOLF.COM

Come play our newly renovated 18-hole mini golf course!

BIRTHDAY PARTIES & CORPORATE EVENTS AVAILABLE

SeptIc InstallatIon House Lots

sITE WORK

Spring is right around the corner

GIve us a call today!

207.754.6436

WWW.DIONNECONSTRUCTIONSERVICES.COM

I hate when I’m waiting for mom to cook dinner, and then I remember

I am the mom, and I have to cook dinner.

Pricey Fees

L.A. Kawani’s Club 3rd Annual

$100,000 Hole In One

Taber’s Restaurant & Golf

Saturday, June 20th, 3pm

Qualifying Dates 2026:

June 13th & 14th, 12-4pm

June 17, 18, 19, 4-7pm

Our Sponsors

Gold

Pediatric Associates

of Lewiston

Uncle Andy’s Digest

Silver

Maine Family

Credit Union

Bronze

Lisbon Community

Credit Union

Larry asks a lawyer

about his fees.

“I charge $50 for three

questions”, the lawyer

says.

“That’s awfully steep,

isn’t it?”, Larry asks.

“Yes, I suppose so”,

the lawyer replies.

“Now what’s your final

question?”

Nothing is really lost… until mom can’t find it.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 25


You can now text

your Shout Out to

207.689.1444

Happy 23rd Mother's Day to my

wonderful momma!

You are truly the best mom ever,

thank you more than words can

describe for everything you've

done and everything you are. I

love you more than the stars in

the sky!

Love, Kailyn

Happy Anniversary Vickie! 31 years and

looking forward to the next 31.

Love you, Tim

Happy 2nd Anniversary Jaime and

Andy Pulk!

And Happy 14th birthday to Jaxon!

Happy Mother’s Day to the most intelligent,

big-hearted silly goose I’ve ever met— you’re

forever my sunshine


Happy Mother’s Day to Billie Jo & Brittany, we’re

so lucky to have you both! Lots of love

To Mariah, the best mom

in the world! You are

everything to us. I love

you, you will always be

the person I come to.

Love, Kiani

LydiaMediaLLC.com

Happy Mother’s Day

to the best mom a

girl could ask for.

I love you, Shelby

UNCLE ANDY’S DIGEST

$49.99

ANNUALLY

Home Delivery

LA Metro Magazine &

Uncle Andy’s Digest

$84.99

ANNUALLY

Home Delivery

Digital

$21

ANNUALLY

Hard Copy

$49.99

ANNUALLY

Home Delivery

DIGITAL &

HARD COPY

$64.99

ANNUALLY

Submit your Shout Out

today to be published in

the next issue!

* Must be submitted by 05/20 for June.*

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 27


Barber Shop

Hustle

My therapist said I have trouble expressing emotion. Can't say I'm surprised.

A young boy enters a

barber shop and the

barber whispers to

his customer, "This is

the dumbest kid in the

world. Watch while I

prove it to you."

The barber puts a

dollar bill in one hand

and two quarters in

the other, then calls

the boy over and asks,

"Which do you want,

son?"

The boy takes the

quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?"

said the barber. "That

kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer

leaves, he sees

the same young boy

coming out of the ice

cream parlor.

"Hey, son! May I

ask you a question?

Why did you take the

quarters instead of the

dollar bill?"

The boy licked his

cone and replied: "Because

the day I take

the dollar the game is

over!"

WISHES

IN THE VALLEY

Open Daily

11am-9pm

207.777.6353 | gridironrestaurant.com | 1567 Lisbon St. Lewiston

LET OUR ADVERTISERS KNOW YOU SAW THEM IN THE DIGEST!

SAVE THE DATE!

AUGUST 8TH AT LOST VALLEY

LOOKING FOR SPONSORS,

VOLUNTEERS & DONATIONS

2nd Annual Wishes In The Valley Event

Benefitting Make-A-Wish Maine.

Live Music, Food Trucks, Cornhole, Chairlift Rides, Bucket Golf, & Disc Golf

FMI: WISHESINTHEVALLEY@GMAIL.COM | WISHESINTHEVALLEY.COM

Uncle Andy’s Digest

28 May 2026

Tim: "Where were you born?" Steve: "Maine" Tim: "What part?"

Steve: "My whole body."


When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the

house is happy to see you.

Out and About

at Burnt Ends

LA Metro Chamber

of Commerce

Breakfast

gippers.com 120 center st. auburn 207.786.0715

In Memory of Trevor Saunders

Trevor loved his

animals and would

have adopted all the

cats and dogs

at the shelter

if he could.

We are honoring his memory and his love for

pets by asking those who can donate in his

name to the Greater Androscoggin Humane

Society. Scan the code below and put

“In memory of Trevor Saunders.”

Greater Androscoggin Humane Society

Scan here

to donate

Jamie-Lyn Allie

55 Strawberry Avenue, Lewiston | 207.783.2311 | gahumane.org

N O W H I R I N G

TOP INDUSTRY PAY

• SITE LABORERS

• EQUIPMENT

OPERATORS

• FOREMAN

• CDL DRIVER

BENEFITS INCLUDE:

Health, Dental, Vision, Paid Holidays,

Paid Time Off, and Boot Allowance

•COMMERCIAL

•RESIDENTIAL

•CIVIL

Louise Austin

Love me some

Roopers!

Call or Email 207.754.2343 | info@hirdcontracting.com

Your Trusted

Excavation Contractor

Aimee Goodwin

Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint!

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 29


CALL the PROS

UNLOCK THE OCEAN

Call

Today!

Barclay’s Skindivers Paradise

805 Main Street, Lewiston • 784-7300 • www.skindiversparadise.net

The smarter way to shop...

• Health

• Medicare

• Life Insurance

• Supplemental

• Long-Term Care

• Retirement

Moe Gowell

Licensed Insurance Agent

Call for a free quote!

(207) 576-1380

Main Street

Music Lessons

ACCEPTING NEW STUDENTS

FOR IN PERSON LESSONS!

• LESSONS

• REPAIRS

• SALES

• RENTALS

207-376-3376

LA’S #1 STOP FOR ALL

YOUR MUSIC NEEDS!

33 Dunn Street, Auburn | mainstreetmusiclessons.com

Poisson & Sons Auto Care

260 S. Main Street, Auburn 207.782.9144

FULL SERVICE GAS STATION

MAY

Stickers

Are Due!

Let us take care of your vehicle.

We’re your stop for fuel and a smile!

Office & Light Industrial Cleaning Services

Serving Lewiston & Auburn Since 2018

Mike Magretto

Veteran Owned & Operated

EmeraldJanitorialServices.com

207-530-8890

ALL THE MOMS IN YOUR LIFE DESERVE A MASSAGE

MASSAGES PROVIDE MANY PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL BENEFITS:

• Stress Relief

• Improved Sleep

• Energy Boost

• Pain Reduction

• Hormone Regulation

• Enhanced Mother - Baby Connection

207.240.6415 | www.memassagetherapy.com

Uncle Andy’s Digest

30 May 2026

My boss asked me to put a joke on the first slide of the presentation…apparently a

picture of my pay slip wasn’t what he was looking for.


CALL the PROS

Roy’s

FoodLand

SATURDAY

Beans, Bread/

Rolls & Cole slaw

$12.99

WEDNESDAY

Ham, Veggie,

Salami, or

Pepperoni Italians

$3.99

Best Chicken

& Ham Salad

In Town!

Happy Mother’s Day

&

Happy Memorial Day

70 Broad Street, Auburn

207-783-8471

Mon.-Thurs. 8am-6pm • Fri. 8am-7pm

Sat. 8am-6pm • Sun. Closed

207.224.0222

www.redmapleaudiology.com

info@redmapleaudiology.com

Let us help you

reconnect with

conversations

7 Cobblestone Dr. Suite 2, Turner

FINE LINE GUN SHOP

GUNS • AMMO • SUPPLIES

KP’S PLACE BRINGS THE

COAST OF MAINE TO YOU!

Where locals Send You for

Real Maine Seafood!

FRESH LOBSTER ROLLS

Clams • Chowder •Fried Seafood • Chicken

WE SERVE

BEER & WINE

590 Plains Road, Poland | 207-998-2374 | finelinegun@aol.com 207.376.4295 | 245 Center St, Auburn | OPEN TUES-SAT 11AM-7PM

Accounting

& Tax

Service You

Can Trust!

HAPPY

MEMORIAL DAY!

MICHAEL G. SPAULDING, P.A.

Certified Public Accountant

Tax Planning & Preparation

for Individuals and Business

P.O. Box 895 | 207.782.1040

2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B | Auburn, ME 04212

RON’S

TRANSMISSION REPAIR SERVICE

YOUR FULL SERVICE

REPAIR FACILITY

OIL CHANGES

SHOCKS

STRUTS

INSPECTIONS

375-4924

515 Gardiner Rd. Wales

Specializing in Domestic & Truck,

Automatic & Manual

Transmissions, Transfer

Cases, & Differentials

Ron

Charpentier, Jr.,

Owner

207-777-5600

24 Hour Service

Proudly serving Auburn,

Lewiston, and the surrounding

communities!

235 N. River Road, Auburn

Help mom keep her cool this

summer by keeping her heat pump

in optimal working condition or

surprising her with a new system.

Happy Mother’s Day!

pro-techrefrigeration.com | theresa@pro-techrefrigeration.com

Full Color

Quality

printing

• Posters

• Booklets

• Carbonless forms

• Envelopes

EVERGREEN

CUSTOM PRINTING, INC.

• Business Cards & More!

782-0525

2 Great Falls Plaza, Suite 1B, Auburn | Info@evergreencustomprinting.com

Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 31


OPENING DAY - MAY 2ND!

Fresh Frozen

Craft Custard

Premium Soft Serve

Ask

Lydia

1184 Maine St, Poland, ME | Check Our FB for Weekly Flavors!

Try one of our

fabulous Pizzas!

85 Center Street, Auburn | 207-784-8221 | Daily, 11am-9pm

One Job Board for

Employers & Job Seekers

LOCAL TALENT.

LOCAL OPPORTUNITIES.

Plant Oddities

UNCLE

ANDY’SDIGEST

www.uncleandys.com/job-board

• Scientists don’t know what causes

four-leafed Clovers.

• The caffeine in Coffee, the capsaicin

in Hot Peppers, and the nicotine

in Tobacco are actually the plants’

version of pesticides in an attempt to

keep things from eating them!

• Plants prefer music that is between

115Hz and 250Hz, with jazz and

Classical being their favorites!

• Freshly cut grass emits green leaf

volatiles into the air which are great

stress relievers! Ironically, the smell

is actually a plant distress call.

Dear Lydia,

Everyone around me seems to be doing big spring

cleaning and getting super organized. Meanwhile, I

keep making “junk drawers” that multiply like rabbits.

How do I get motivated to declutter without getting

overwhelmed?

– Buried in Stuff in Lisbon

Dear Buried in Stuff,

First, let me assure you that as a professional collector

of very important treasures (tennis balls, mystery socks,

sticks shaped like other sticks), I am highly qualified to

help. Here is my foolproof system for decluttering:

Step 1: Start with a nap.

Big projects require big energy. Whenever I feel overwhelmed,

I lie down dramatically and recharge. You call it

procrastinating. I call it strategic power restoration.

Step 2: Use the “Sniff Test.”

When I clean my toy basket, I ask myself: Do I love this?

Does this bring me joy? Is this secretly a snack?

If the answer is no, it can probably go.

Step 3: Tiny piles, not giant mountains.

Humans get overwhelmed when they try to clean the

whole house. That’s like trying to chase all the squirrels

at once. Impossible. Pick one drawer. One shelf. One tiny

victory. Then celebrate like you just won Best in Show.

Step 4: Reward system is CRITICAL. After every small

success, reward yourself. Personally, I recommend treats,

praise, and telling everyone what a good job you did. This

step is non-negotiable.

Remember: Decluttering isn’t about getting rid of everything.

It’s about making room for naps, snacks, and the

things you love most. Cozy beats perfect every time.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I must go reorganize my blanket

pile by fluffiness.

Tail wags and wisdom,

Lydia

Scan here to submit

your question OR

Text question to

207.689.1444

Uncle Andy’s Digest

32 May 2026

I just lost my job as a psychic. I did not see that coming.


You know you’re a mom when you understand why Mama Bear’s porridge was too cold.

Everyone is welcome!

The Franco Center is proud to serve as a nonprofit steward of the historic

former St. Mary’s Church, a cherished landmark that reflects the rich heritage

and enduring contributions of Lewiston’s Franco-American community.

Through cultural programs, live performances, and community gatherings,

we honor this legacy while creating a welcoming space for everyone to

connect and celebrate. You don’t need to be a member—or speak French—

to feel at home here. All are invited to experience the history, hospitality, and

vibrant spirit of the Franco Center.

May 16 Rod Stewart tribute concert

Sponsors: Platz Associates; Berman & Simmons;

Central Distributors; and Androscoggin Bank

June 3 Line Dancing with live music by

Continental Shakedown

6:30pm to 9pm

$15 at the door

June 24 La Rencontre on

St. Jean Baptiste Day

at the Franco Center in collaboration with

Franco-American Collection and

University of Southern Maine

Honoring French-Canadian heritage, the event features

traditional songs, lively entertainment, food, and plenty of

camaraderie. Everyone is welcome! Doors/Cash Bar 5pm;

Dinner 6pm followed by dancing! Sponsor: TV5Monde

July 3 Franco-American War Veterans

Free Concert 7-9pm

Lewiston’s Veterans Counsel Nation’s Birthday Band Concert,

a 17-piece band, will commemorate the 250 anniversary of

the United States of America.

* RSVP our Escape Room: bookeo.com/franco

* RENT our beautiful, historic venue for your corporate or personal

event. Call 207-333-3251

Out and About

at Burnt Ends

L.A. Metro Chamber

of Commerce

Breakfast

Happy Spring

everyone!

Michelle Ervin

Heritier Nosso

I'm the one

who's supposed to be

taking pictures.

Season Underwriter: Maple Way Dental Care;

Media Sponsors: Bennett Radio Group | Turner Publishing | Sun Journal | Uncle Andy’s Digest

46 Cedar St., Lewiston

207-689-2000

www.francocenter.org

I got lost in your eyes. But I also get lost in most department stores,

so I wouldn't read too much into it.

Ryan Donovan

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 33


| EVENTS |

MAY

LYDIA’S

LUNCH BUNCH

every Tuesday

Trivia Night

Burnt Ends Barbecue

120 Center St., Auburn

6pm

BurntEndsMaine.com

Episode 388

Episode 390

Episode 391

Episode 394

Uncle Andy’s Digest

May 2026

May 1, 8, 15

Lewiston Live

Busking Festival

Dufresne Plaza

72 Lisbon St. Lewiston

4pm - 7pm

LewistonMaine.gov

May 2

Grand Opening

Salt& Light Community Center

29 Hampshire St., Auburn

1pm

SaltAndLightCommunity

Center.org

Maine’s Got Talent

Donald M. Gay Performing

Arts Center

77 Harris St., Auburn

7pm

FB.com/MainesGotTalent

Shugah Kitty

Fast Breaks

1465 Lisbon St., Lewiston

8pm

FB.com/ShugahKitty

May 3

Mother’s Day Paint Party

Wicked Illustrations

140 Canal St., Lewiston

1pm - 3pm

FB.com/WickedIllustrations

May 6

Xander Nelson

Nonesuch River Brewing

723 Maine St., Poland

6pm

NonesuchRiverBrewing.com

Community CU-

Bridges Out of Poverty

Part II, Community &

Institutional Lens

East Auburn Baptist Church

560 Park Ave, Auburn

9am - 12pm

Communitycreditunion.com

May 7

3rd Annual Stigma Event

Lewiston Armory

65 Central Ave., Lewiston

2pm

LookingAheadClubhouse.org

Bowl for Kids’ Sake

Just-In-Time Recreation

22 Mollison Way, Lewiston

3pm - 8pm

BBBSBathBrunswick.org

David Jacquet

Baxter Brewing

120 Mill St., Lewiston

6pm - 9pm

FB.com/UkenSmile

May 8-10

Hamid Circus

The Colisee

190 Birch St., Lewiston

Start times vary

TheColisee.com

May 8-17

Grandma Gatewood

Took a Walk

The Public Theatre

31 Maple St., Lewiston

Start times vary

ThePublicTheatre.org

Episode 395

May 8

Amy Stacey Curtis

Olive Pit Brewing

16 Main St., Lisbon Falls

7pm

FB.com/OlivePitBrewing

May 9

Mother’s Day Tea Party

Lydia Media

2 Great Falls Plaza, Auburn

10am - 1pm

FB.com/LydiaMediaLLC

Saturday Storytime

Lewiston Public Library

200 Lisbon St., Lewiston

11am

LPLonline.org

Pastries & Porcelain

Foss Mansion

19 Elm St., Auburn

2pm

FB.com/WomansLiteraryUnion

Talk, Tease & Please

L/A Community Little Theatre

30 Academy St., Auburn

7pm

FB.com/SashaLeesRomanceBoutique

May 9

Greenbriar/The Outsiders

PBR/Cryin’ Caleb LA Arts

168 Lisbon St., Lewiston

7pm

LAarts.org

34

Send us your events for June by May 20th. Text 207.689.1444 or email office@LydiaMediaLLC.com


Calendar

Sponsored by:

2026

May 12

Spring Blood Drive

Hilton Garden Inn Auburn

Riverwatch

12 Great Falls Plaza

9am - 1:30pm

FB.com/AVCMountainstoShore

Ranked Choice

Voting Education

Lewiston Public Library

200 Lisbon St., Lewiston

5:30pm

LPLonline.org

May 13

Acoustic Sunshine

Sea40

40 East Ave., Lewiston

7pm - 9:30pm

Sea40me.com

May 14

Brewing Connections

Schooner Estates

200 Stetson Rd., Auburn

7:30am

LAMetroChamber.com

May 15

Fill the Plate Breakfast

Hilton Garden Inn Auburn

Riverwatch

12 Great Falls Plaza

7am - 9am

SeniorsPlus.org

Movement at the Museum -

Bird Walk

Maine MILL

35 Canal St., Lewiston

5pm

MaineMILL.org

Potty Mouth Pottery

Moon Stone Pottery

186 Turner St., Auburn

6pm - 8:30pm

FB.com/MoonStonePotteryME

DumBum

Hopper’s

316 Pinewoods Rd., Lewiston

6pm

AppleValleyME.com

Drag Me to the Beach

Drag Show

Mixers Nightclub & Lounge

136 Sabattus Rd., Sabattus

7pm - 11:30pm

MixersNightclubLounge.com

May 16

Museum Open House

Poland Spring Preservation

Society

1231 Maine St., Poland

9am - 4pm

PolandSpringPS.org

Auburn Lobster Festival

Festival Plaza

112 Main St., Auburn

1pm - 6pm

AuburnLobsterFestival.com

IAFF Local 797

Charity Ball

Hilton Garden Inn Auburn

Riverwatch

12 Great Falls Plaza

4pm - 10pm

IAFF797.org

Rod Stewart Tribute

Concert

Franco Center

46 Cedar St., Lewiston

7pm

FrancoCenter.org

MWA Community

Shredding Event

Modern Woodmen of America

184 Webster St., Lewiston

9am - 11am

ModernWoodmen.org

L-A Rotary Shredding

Event

John F. Murphy Homes

800 Center St., Auburn

9am - 1pm

FB.com/LewistonAuburnRotary

May 18

Heroes Golf Tournament

Martindale Country Club

527 Beech Hill Rd., Auburn

8am

HouseInTheWoods.org

Maker Monday

Lewiston Public Library

200 Lisbon St., Lewiston

4pm - 6:30pm

LPLonline.org

May 21

LA Metro Chamber Awards

Poland Spring Resort

640 Maine St., Poland

3pm - 6:30pm

LAMetroChamber.com

May 22

Uncle Andy’s Digest 30th

Anniversary Celebration

Hilton Garden Inn Auburn

Riverwatch

14 Great Falls Plaza, Auburn

6pm - 10pm

FB.com/UncleAndysDigest

May 28

Survivor Storytellers Group

Safe Voices

100 Lisbon St., Lewiston

5pm-6:30pm

SafeVoices.org

May 30

Plant Sale for Ending

Hunger

OTIS FCU

170 Main St., Jay

8am - Noon

OtisFCU.coop

Gravestone Cleaning

Riverside Cemetery

192 Summer St., Lewiston

10am - Noon

RiversideCemeteryLewistonME.org

Hansel and Gretel

The Public Theatre

31 Maple St., Lewiston

2pm

ThePublicTheatre.org

Community CU Night

Oxford Plains Speedway

785 Main St, Oxford

6pm

oxfordplains.com

May 31

B.B.A.D.V. 9 Hole Classic

Apple Valley Golf Course

316 Pinewoods Rd., Lewiston

8am

PhoenixNLKarate.org

A True and Inspiring

Adventure

In 1955 at the age of 67,

Emma “Grandma” Gatewood

told her children she was

“going for a walk” and set out

with her duffel bag, shower

curtain (to keep dry) and a

pair of Keds sneakers to walk

the Appalachian Trail. Two

thousand miles later, she

became the first woman to solo

hike 14 states from Georgia

to the top of Mt. Katahdin in

Maine. Don’t miss the New

England premiere of this

true and inspiring adventure

celebrating the resiliency

of the human spirit and the

courage required to walk into

the unknown.

All Tickets $15

Sat, May 30 @ 2 PM

May

8-17

ThePublicTheatre.org

(207) 782-3200

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 35

31 Maple Street, Lewiston


Interview

It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner

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Uncle Andy’s Digest

36 May 2026

I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.


Hi,

Top Agent of

the Month

March 2026

Uncle Andy’s Digest

March 2025

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LA’s Afternoon

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Morning Show

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Cleanings for:

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Pizza - Fresh and Tasty

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Check out our

podcast and hear

what's happening

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FMI 207.783.7039 or office@LydiaMediaLLC.com

Spring clean-up is here!

Call now to get on our list for

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Aerating & Seeding

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207-709-0501

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Keep your shoes clean

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We Scoop...

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UAD March 2025

Tell our advertisers you saw

them in Uncle Andy’s Digest!

Celebrating

30 Years in print!

Out and About

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Breakfast

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favorite chamber

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John Rice &

Sam Herriot

Yes, we all

love Sam!

Ben Fournier

It's going to be a

bright, sun shiny

day!

Nicole Lajoie-Caron

I can totally keep secrets. It's the people I tell them to that can't.

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 37


54

98

Directory of Advertisers

C - front cover | IFC - inside front cover

BC - back cover | IBC - inside back cover

AUTOMOTIVE

Armand’s Auto Body............................C

armandsautobody.com

Mike's Complete Auto Center......... 14

207.753.0433

Poisson & Sons Auto Care................ 30

207.782.9144

Ron’s Transmission............................ 31

207.375.492

CLEANING PROFESSIONALS

Bin There Dump That........................17

BinThereDumpThatUSA.com

Collaborative Cleaners......................37

207.713.1550

Collins Carpet Cleaning....................... 16

CollinsCarpetCleaning.com

Emerald Janitorial..............................30

EmeraldJanitorialServices.com

Simply Clean ME LLC.......................18

207.370.7244

Scoop 4Paws........................................19

207.713.1550

CONSTRUCTION & EXCAVATION

Dionne Construction........................... 25

207.754.6436

Hird Contracting................................ 29

207.754.2343

Sturdy Hardware.................................29

207.375.6253

DENTISTS & DENTURES

Smile Again Dentures.......................... 4

SmileAgainDentures.com

EDUCATION/BUSINESS SERVICES

Barclay's Skindivers Paradise........... 30

207.784.7300

Central Maine Community College..... 7

cmcc.edu

LA Metro Chamber of Commerce.... 22

lametrochamber.com

Main Street Music Lessons................ 30

207.376.3376

Sassy Strides Equestrian................... 10

207.514.6626

ELECTRICAL

DeBlois Electric, Inc............................ 8

debloiselectric.com

ENTERTAINMENT

American Legion Post 153............... 15

207-782-1118

Apple Valley.........................................23

207-784-9773

Franco Center......................................33

francocenter.org

Mother's Day Tea Party................... 15

207-689-1444

Tabers...................................................11

Tabersgolf.com

The Public Theatre............................35

207.782.3200

Uncle Andy's Digest 30th Anniversary.... 24

207-689-1444

FINANCIAL SERVICES

Community Credit Union....................C

communitycreditunion.com

Dirigo Federal Credit Union............ 30

dirigofcu.com

Michael G. Spaulding........................ 31

207.782.1040

Modern Woodmen of America...3, 25

modern-woodmen.org

Otis Federal Credit Union................ 10

207.879.0900

Great Falls Credit Union....................C

207.782.7192

USA Mortgage - Jhanae LaPlante....... 18

207-576-4973

Worthy Bookkeeping............................ 37

Worthybkkg.com

FOOD & BEVERAGE

Apple Valley.........................................18

207-784-9773

Dad's Place............................................ 5

dadsplacemaine.com

Firehouse Grill................................... BC

firehouseauburn.com

George’s Pizza.....................................37

georgespizza.com

Gipper’s................................................29

gippers.com

GridIron Restaurant.......................... 28

gridironrestaurant.com

Hoppers Restaurant........................... 18

207.784.9773

KP's Place............................................31

207.376.4295

Kristi's Cafe.........................................23

kristi'scafe.com

Mac’s Grill............................................. 5

MacsGrill.com

Nonesuch..............................................17

207.998.5008

Pat’s Pizza Auburn.............................. 32

patsauburn.com

Roopers Beverage & Redemption...39

roopersbeverage.com

Roy’s All Steak & Golf Center........ 25

Roysgolf.com

Roy’s Foodland....................................31

ShopAtRoysFoodland.com

The Village Inn-Auburn.................... 19

villageinnmaine.com

The Log Yard Dairy Bar................... 32

Thelogyarddairybar.com

HEALTH & WELLNESS

ABC Pool...................................................11

abcpool.com

Andwell Health Partners................... 30

andwell.org

East Auburn Pools.............................. 14

207.713.5384

Essence Wellness Spa LLC............... 18

essencewellnessspa.com

Happy Haven....................................... 12

happyhaven.info

ME Massage Therapy........................ 30

memassagetherapy.com

Red Maple Audiology........................31

207.224.0222

Seniors Plus.........................................15

207.795.4010

HEATING & PLUMBING

Heat Pumps of Maine.........................C

heatpumpsofmaine.com

Pro-Tech Refrigeration..................... 31

pro-techrefrigeration.com

Strong Propane...................................16

strongpropaneservices.com

HOME IMPROVEMENT

ABC Pool...................................................11

abcpool.com

Bin There Dump That........................ 17

BinThereDumpThatUSA.com

Collins Carpet Cleaning....................... 16

CollinsCarpetCleaning.com

Uncle Andy’s Digest

38 May 2026

79

68


Your local guide to... well, just about anything!

East Auburn Pools.............................. 14

207.713.5384

Garden Spot Farm...............................12

GardenSpotFarm.com

Gutter Brothers...................................16

207.240.4048

Kitchen Designs by Stacy................... 2

207.754.8833

Upfront Home Inspections............... 19

207.619.0868

Got Bugs Pest Services LLC............37

207.242.4988

Sturdy Hardware.................................29

207.375.625

True North Landscaping..................37

207.709.0501

INSURANCE

Champoux Insurance......................... 25

888.983.2246

Lisa Laliberte-State Farm................... 6

207.783.3332

John Blanchette NFP Insurance...... 14

207.784.9358

Moe Gowell Health Markets............ 14

207.576.1380

MISCELLANEOUS

Greater Androscoggin Humane Society..... 20

gahumane.org/pawitforward

Happy Haven.......................................12

happyhaven.info

LA Chamber of Commerce.............. 22

lametrochamber.com

Lewiston Live Podcast....................... 16

PRINT & PROMOTIONAL

Coastal T-Shirts....................................6

coastaltshirts.com

Evergreen Custom Printing.............31

207.782.0525

WIGY Radio.......................................22

wigyradio.com

REAL ESTATE

Debbie Bodwell-Guild Mortgage..... BC

207.754.3962

DuBois Realty..............................20, 21

duboisrealtygroup.net

Maine Source Realty..........................11

mainesourcehomes.com

Matt Sells Maine.............................. BC

MattSellsMaine.com.com

The Maine Real Estate Experience.... 37

TMREE.com

USA Mortgage - Jhanae LaPlante....... 18

207-576-4973

RECREATION

ABC Pools.............................................. 8

abcpool.com

Apple Valley.........................................23

207-784-9773

Barclay’s Skindivers Paradise........... 30

207.784.7300

East Auburn Pools.............................. 14

207.713.5384

REDEMPTION CENTERS

Dad's Place............................................9

dadsplacemaine.com

Roopers Beverage & Redemption.....39

roopersbeverage.com

RETIREMENT

Modern Woodmen of America...3, 25

modern-woodmen.org

The Chapman House Assisted Living ....13

207.783.0961

Seniors Plus.........................................12

207.795.4010

The Meadows Senior Living............23

207.946.3007

SPORTING GOODS

Barclay’s Skindivers Paradise...............30

207.784.7300

Fine Line Gun Shop........................... 31

207.998.2374

G3 Firearms.........................................16

G3Firearms.com

JT Reids Guns & Cigars................... 17

207.777.3579

“HONEST, FUNNY, AND

DEPENDABLE.”

So what do you say about Tasha?

Honest , funny and dependable just to name a

few things. She works a shift no one wants and

does it with pride.

She is willing to learn and take on any task given

to her. She has fit in with the Roopers family

incredibly well and we are grateful to have her.

Thank you for everything you do for us Tasha!

--Rich Asselin, Sabattus Street Manager

794 Sabattus St., Lewiston | 783.6353

686 Main St., Lewiston | 344.1200

545 Minot Ave., Auburn | 783.2047

980 Main St., Oxford | 539.6072

TASHA JORDAN

SABATTUS STREET CASHIER

ROOPERSBEVERAGE.COM

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com 39


Join Us for Trivia - Mondays, 6:30pm

10

$ 10

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Whiskey Wednesdays - $1 00 Off Whiskey Drinks

$ 8

Jamaican

Purple Rain Peach Cosmo

207-376-4959 • 47 Broad Street, Auburn • www.firehouseauburn.com

Equal Housing Opportunity

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Celebrating Community

& Businesses for 30 Years

Join Us For a Night of

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Friday, May 22nd | 6pm-10pm

90’s Music from

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Come as you are or

in your 90’s best!

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Open to the Public

Hilton Garden Inn, Auburn Riverwatch

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Pay with Venmo!

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Your local guide to... well, just about anything!

Uncle Andy’s Digest

UncleAndys.com

40 May 2026

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