book one redone - Coldbacon

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Such Is The Difference Between Big and Little
Ever notice how adults can be so much more magnanimous than children?
Adults will often let things go. Kids will not. If you took Jimmy’s Dragon
Ball Z action figure, then Jimmy is either going to attempt to do real
damage to you, tell mom, or both. There will be no appeals in this. But an
adult, James, might just let it go. Why is this? Simple economics. You
see, James knows he can earn $300,000 if he shows up to work every day
and plays by 90% of the rules. Therefore, $3 is nothing to James. To
Jimmy, on the other hand, $3 represents a substantial fraction of his
weekly allowance. $3 is not nothing.
For a rational adult, most problems can be equated to small sums of
money. Can’t find a parking space? Valet it. Don’t like your cocktail?
Order another. Such problems are as insects to people with money. The
true test of whether an adult is really laid back is time. Time is the only
real currency for the moneyed American. See how James does with a flat
tire, or a ten car pile-up—or even two, if it’s the right two. And so I say
put James in jail with Bubba for ten to fifteen, and give Jimmy his $3
back, with interest.
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