book one redone - Coldbacon

“What are you laughing at? They’re your clothes, motherfucker!” Sure
Bob’s clever and amusing, but he’s also a jerk. As such we cannot fully
sympathize with him. But then this conflicts with the earlier scene where
we are entirely on his side as he talks to his weenie of a wife? It’s the
same with Charlotte. One minute we’re supposed to sympathize with her
(phone conversation with her disinterested friend, her neglecting husband,
the world is conspiring to make her bored). The next minute she’s waxing
sour about some blonde actress friend of hers and basically just being an
all-around wet blanket. The net result is we stop giving a shit.
Stylistically, the film’s selling point is its serious jet lag melancholy and
ennuic pacing. The restaurant scene after Bill’s indiscretion was slow and
sweet like a Maggie Cheung Tony Leung longing contest. And it
definitely captured the “morning after” “what else is there to say?”
“Sunday homework” feeling. Sunday homework—ugh. But all of this
languidity and missed romance is just a shadow of Wong Kar-Wai and Jia
Zhangke, who are both real directors.
So what about the humor? Murray is exactly as charming and witty as you
thought he was, just like he’d be if I filmed him right now in his bathtub
in Brentwood with my camcorder. Whatever. It has little in particular to
do with Sofia Coppola’s screenplay. There’s even a cameo by Not
Cameron Diaz presumably to allow for some hot Hollywood satire. But
please make it funny. Lost’s satire is unfortunately the fill-up-the-screenwaste-my-time
variety—far from the maddening Being John Malkovich
and nowhere near as punishing as the low blows of Ghost World. “We
both have dogs. We both live in L.A.” Yes. Try watching Paris Hilton for
ten seconds.
Here’s an example of Coppola’s failure to actuate the signal. We’re
supposed to think our girl is smart while Not Cameron Diaz is Charlie’s
Angels dumb because she’s going under the name Evelyn Waugh, who
was actually a male author using a female pen name. But I actually
thought that was clever of her. Either way, it just seemed like an excuse
for Coppola to show off her mad literary skillz. Here, Sofia and Co. have
simply made an honest miscalculation. This sort of thing has cropped up
before and it’s always been due to human error. I prescribe Spirited Away.
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