Community Zine

One would have thought having the time after the war to figure out and properly categorize
his feelings would help with coming to terms with Dimitri and him becoming…
something other than friends.
Well, it hadn’t. Whether it be due to the limited nature of the relationship - limited
time, limited interactions - Felix still wasn’t entirely used to the feeling of waking up
to Dimitri’s breath against his skin, firm arms around his waist giving more warmth
than harm.
It’s a one-of-a-kind torture Felix hadn’t been prepared for when they first reached
the conclusion that maybe their feelings were worth sharing and acting on. It’s especially
bad on the mornings immediately after Felix’s return from Fraldarius territory,
and so Felix feels suffocated and overheated.
He doesn’t move, despite that.
--
He doesn’t remember Dimitri coming in last night, so the fool probably stayed
working in his study overtime despite Dedue’s kindly worded warnings.
Ugh. Felix should have gone to fetch him himself, but he had been tired, the effects
of travel having lingered longer than he had expected.
The only thing he can really do is let Dimitri sleep a bit longer and stay as still as humanly
possible, since Dimitri is just as easy to stir as Felix himself. A lasting after-effect
from living from fight to fight and battle to battle during the war.
Felix isn’t cruel enough to disturb Dimitri’s sleep when it’s this peaceful, and so he
resigns himself to his fate of burning away from the furnace that is his… his…
Even now, Felix can’t think of the term without his mind going blank and short-circuiting,
and so he halts that train of thought before it can progress further.
Felix listens to that breath now, doesn’t lift his hand to move his hair so the exhaled
air wouldn’t tickle his admittedly sensitive neck. He does let his hand go to the arm
hanging loosely over his side, lets his fingers run over the scars before settling for
entwining their fingers together.
He loved holding Dimitri’s hand as a child.
Not that he needs to know, though naturally he does - of course Dimitri knows, he
seems to remember all of Felix’s most embarrassing qualities with sharp clarity. It
makes Felix flush with exasperation every time Dimitri suggests as much, which in
turn results in Dimitri smiling and his one visible eye crinkling with mirth.
Now Felix quietly, without fuss, presses his palm against the back of Dimitri’s hand