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This raises the whole question as to what extent
these recollections might be regarded as ‘mere
fictions’ resulting in a consequent belief that we,
too, are ultimately fictions. Freeman suggests
that, if we question the very notion of a ‘true
past’ there to be discovered we would then, as
Derrida would argue, concentrate on the study
of the multiple texts of our lives rather than
constantly worrying about what exists outside
those texts.
Freeman goes on to raise the question that, if
both our lives and the stories we tell about them
are socially constructed to the extent that we
cannot ‘step beyond the discursive order inherent in
one’s own culture’ then how will we ever be able
to do anything new. He argues for the need to
both understand and rewrite ourselves, reminding
us of Bakhtin’s powerful words,
‘The better a person understands the degree
to which he is externally determined, the closer
he comes to understanding and exercising
his real freedom.’ (Bakhtin 1986 quoted in
Freeman 1993 p 24)
These words certainly resonate with my attempts
to understand my own biography in that it has
largely been through gaining a fuller understanding
of the extent to which I was socially
constructed that I have been able to free myself
to make, at least to some extent, free choices
about how I really want to be.
What do we mean by ‘findings’
I well remember the occasion when my supervisor
suggested I might like to meet up with
two other Ph.D. students to discuss our ‘Most
important finding’. My initial reaction was one
of panic and confusion and my journal entry at
the time reads as follows:
When Damian first mentioned that this
was to be the topic at our joint meeting with
Stephen, my initial reaction was something
like
“That could be a problem. I don’t think I’ve
really got any findings!”
I suppose what I really mean is that I’m not
really happy with the use of the word ‘finding’
as a way of summarising the outcomes of
my research.
In relation to action research, ‘finding’, for
me implies neat solutions. It’s an attempt to
objectify what we do, to give people what they
want in terms of neat solutions.
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