World's Largest Rubber Band Ball - Trixine

☺ World’s Largest Rubber Band Ball
☺ The TINK, On The One and Two, Monster Mix Twilo
☺ Flower Soup, Rudy, and Other Inside Jokes You Won’t Get
☺ Over 75 Music and Zine Reviews ☺ Short Stories, Poetry
☺ The Cecil County Drag Strip ☺ A New Fashion Column

Tric Number Twelve
Part 12 in the Renaissance Magazine Series September / Fall 2001
You should send me some art or writing.
Cover Art by: Casey Grabowski
This zine is based on submissions.
Submittals:
For writing: anything over one page, e-mail is the most efficient and preferred. Or, please give it to me on floppy disc
in Word format or send the disk through snail-mail. Please don’t send lots of poetry on regular paper. My hands get
tired. A few pages of paper are fine, just try to do it on the computer. Profanity is O.K. when appropriate. Sex is often
an artist's base for expression- that's fine, just don't be an idiot. Send me stuff about politics, music, books, movies,
food, fashion, sports- especially skateboarding, snowboarding, and surfing, and any other reviews. Please, don't
promise me something, then back out. Keep this zine relevant to its locality. Don't turn people away because they are
not musicians or writers or “artists”. This is for everyone, so spread it instead of confining it. Don’t be a dickey.
For artists: I need illustrations and pictures! Please inquire if interested in doing a cover!
How to get hold of me: E-mail me: tric@tonedeafrecords.com . now, Now, NOW! The new website
www.tonedeafrecords.com now hosts tric zine as pdf files, issues #7 to #10 are up. Please visit and support the artists.
We like to help book bands, and I always give a review, so mail me your or your friend’s zine, video, book, tape,
record, or CD, and/or writing and pictures and I promise to get back to you. I NEED NEW 7”S TO REVIEW!
Grabowski
tric zine
219 East Court
Wilmington, DE
i:Casey
19810
Zine Info: Free, bi-monthly or quarterly, openforum
visual art, word and music oriented, 3500
copies per issue, 32 pages.
Ads- $35 quarter page, $50 half page, $75 full
page, $90 cover (insides or back)
Guaranteed distribution- Mainly northern Delaware
and greater Philly, all up and down the north-east corridor
to cafes, book and record shops, and friends; mail
order all over U.S., Canada, and starting to go overseas,
and more bulk goes with me or my friends when we go
out of town.
I will definitely trade CDs to review for ad space! Get
hold of me for swap rates! Smaller the label, better the
trade, yo! Thanks everyone for sticking with me!
Status: If you haven’t noticed, I’m running short on
space. That means I need more local advertising from
small businesses like restaurants to increase my page
number. If you or you know anyone who you think
may be interested, let me know! Thanks to the graphic
design students who responded to my call out! If we
haven’t worked together yet, don’t worry, we will soon!
inside the poison words
Whirlwind
looking for negative worlds inside the poison [of]
words I want to give away. Tear them out of me and bury
them deep, deeper than ink -- forever. Gone. I'd be next. I
could be gone. And the ghost of my song would play on . . .
a phantom room of passion and play. - Unlit
tric@tonedeafrecords.com
This issue is dedicated to the lives lost during the bombing
of the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, and to those
who are suffering from the loss of family and friends.

It holds the Guinness Book of World Records Title! It’s 2008 lbs, 4 1/2 feet wide, almost
13 feet in circumference, and uses 250,000 rubber bands! It’s sponsored by Alliance
Rubber in Hot Springs, Arkansas! It’s gotten an offer of $10,000! WHAT COULD IT BE?
IT’S...
John Bain, creator and current keeper of this
elastic monstrosity, spent 1 year and 8 months
making sure he’d go down in rubber band history.
He’s been seen on Regis and Kathy Lee,
Ripley’s Believe It or Not, Howard Stern, ABC,
CBS, & NBC Philadelphia News. Not only did he
grow up down the street from me in Wilmington,
Delaware, but he graduated high school with me
at Concord High, class of 1995! Even crazier, we
took 10th grade German together, and that’s why
I, KC9000, got THE exclusive interview...
Tric: Wie gehts, John?
John: Sehr gut, danke! Und Sie?
Tric: Nicht schlecht. Gehen Sie auf der Staat?
John: Ja, Ich gehen immer nach der Staat.
Tric: Wie kommst du in die Schule?
John: Ich komme mit dem Rad.
Tric: Wie spät ist es?
John: Est ist Sechs Uhr zwanzig.
Tric: In welchen Monat kommt Weihnachten?
John: Weihnachten kommt in Dezember.
Tric: Haben Sie frisches Fleisch?
John: Ich hatte uns immer vor Hunden gefürchtet.
Tric: Das ist schade! Für das Schwein habe ich Korn.
John: Ja, Ich komme aus den Vereinigten Staaten.
Tric: Worüber sprechen Sie?
John: Ich spreche der Badeanzug.
Tric: Warum? Wie ist das Wetter heute?
John: Es ist windig und bewölkt.
Tric: Ja, Ich fühle mich nicht wohl. Ich ziehe mir den
Mantel aus.
John: Dürfte ich Ihr Telefon benutzen? Mein Freund
wird jetzt wohl zu Hause sein.
Tric: Wer war die Frau, mit der ich dich gesehen haben?
John: Kann ich jetzt gehen?
To answer your question, yes it does bounce. A smaller
one was dropped off the top of Big Kahuna night club,
where they filmed the Ripley’s shoot. It bounced about
about 40 feet up, and Mr. Tuttleman bought it off John
for $500.
John’s ball is about to kick off its first US tour
this fall, so look for it in a museum near you!
Please visit www.recordball.com for more info!

The All-American High Dive Team featuring Greg,
an official Russian Olympic Superstar (holding sign),
LOVES FLOWER SOUP! They also love Dutch Wonderland
(pictured in background).
is
sooo
real...
if you dare...
visit: www.angelfire.com/de/flowersoup
Enuff Znuff's guitarist Monaco and singer
Donnie Vie LOVE FLOWER SOUP, especially
when they're drunk in Big Kahuna parking lot!
“Eye ♥ Flower Soup?” Donnie, you’re so funny, but you messed up my sign for Monoco!

Local Bits!
Fraz
“The Funk Finale”
Part 3 in “The Funk
Odyssey”, this is tight
electro-breakbeat mixed
with minimal acid jazz.
Coming from WVUD’s
Crash and Burn DJ
maestro, the melodies
on this album are so
acidic they melted my
CD player, and breaks
are good and funky. I
think the breakbeat stuff
is seriously incredible,
but the slower, experimental
stuff could still
use a little fine tuning.
Overall, I can’t emphasize
how glad I am that
stuff like this is being
made in Newark, DE,
and much props to Fraz
for sticking with C n’ B
and WVUD for as long
as you have. Keep up
the good work, man!
www.funkfreaks.com
fraz@funkfreaks.com
I was a little bummed that I only got five local music submissions this summer,
but that’s probably because I spent most of my time at the beach and didn’t
heckle anyone for free stuff. Oh, well... keep sending it in! Word!
Sock Full of Pennyz
“The Long Journey
Home”
Ladies and gentlemen,
this is your local highschool
ska band. With
the fizzling out of the
Skatalites, and Daze
Alone and Gangster
Pump relocating to
seedy Delaware bars,
the Pennyz breath a new
air of life into our little
punk scene. There’s one
little problem, though.
These are all cheesy
love songs about kissing
and hooking up! What’s
up with that? That’s not
punk! You can’t have a
hardcore name if you’re
going to talk about
snow days and not getting
a paper written!
One thing I still like
about Daze, they’re all
about good old fuckin’
shit up. Anyway, the
rhythms are tight, and
the recording is great.
Pilot Round the Sun
(S/T EP)
For those of you who
remember DE scenesters
Rob of Kobayashi
Maru and The Kelly
Ricketts Band, and Sean
of the Gilroys, they’ve
migrated up to West
Chester to help expand
the musical ideas of Tim
Celfo, who started
PRTS about a year ago.
They’re alternative pop,
definitely showing signs
of listening to Weezer or
other Y-100 schtuff. In
fact, thy got a little play
on Y-100. They recorded
their first selfreleased
EP at Creep,
and are now in the
midst of recording their
full length, which Creep
will be releasing, which
is a little surprising,
since Creep is known
for sticking to punk and
hardcore.
pilotroundthesun.com
One Life to Live
(Demo)
This is the CD they’re
selling at shows, titled
“Above and Beyond”,
and it seriously blew me
away. As far as I know,
these local
hardcore/punk/metal
kids are super tight, but
they asked me to let you
know that if you’ve
seen some of their last
few shows, they’re
admittingly not up to
par, and that they’re
going through some
changes. I especially
like the first song,
‘Better Than You’.
It’s got these dueling
guitars, a super fast
double bass kick, and
high- pitched
screeching. vocals.
Maybe I’m being
fooled by the tape or
something, but right
now, I’m all about it!
Undergirl
“She’s Too Much for
My Mirror” (Scarlet A)
I got this one at their
CD release party earlier
this summer at the
Khyber, and it’s nasty,
raw girl/guy punk rockwith
emphasis on Rock.
Amy DiCamillo’s raspy
snarly singing is just as
scary as the evil sneers
she gives the crowd
while they rip out
power chord madness.
They’re loud, obnoxious,
and nastyeverything
it takes to
be a great bar punk
band, not to mention
that they’re super
tight, which I’d say
is due to the drumming.
Mess with
them and you’ll get
the smackdown!
They’ve also got
two 7”s, one on
Scarlet A, and the
other on Black Hole.
Long live Groove; heart and soul of rock and roll. We are Invasion. We are guitar, bass,
drums, and voice. We are the abandoned children of punk, the disillusioned followers of funky,
heavy, emo-psychedelia. We are war-weary combatants serving a tour of duty for the new peace. A
relief mission from anger, love, loss, and loneliness. Our struggle is the unification of the music, the
resurrection of its audience. We find inspiration in the bio-kinetic manipulation of rhythm. We seek
solace in the tenderness and intimacy of sweet, slow melodies. We look for redemption in the dizzy
energy of electricity and adrenaline. We bring shining moments of exhaustion and joy.
We invite you to come out and share the singular signal between ideo-individuals, to receive a
broadcast message on the universal wavelength. The best communication is always honest. It is information
from the source. It is written on the back of bank notes. It is flown from flagpoles. It overruns
borders. It discerns justice from law, dollars from sense, and public officials from boards of
directors. There is no deception. There will be no surrender. Become an invader. Be part of the
invasion.
www.geocities.com/oltlhardcore
users.erols.com/shydoll/undergirl.html

The Fall of
Twilo:
The Word
According to
DJMCB
(text by Casey)
Friday, May 11th, 2001, at 5 am,
the NYPD walked into New York’s
most predominant and influential
night club, and flicked the switch
to the “off” position. Since then,
the equipment has been auctioned
off, world-class DJs have
filtered out to smaller venues, and
the electronic music scene- globally,
regionally, and locally- has
been simply left hanging, jaw
dropped. You see, their Cabaret
license ran out in early September
2000, and in attempt to renew the
license, they were denied, the city
alleging open drug use and sales. During the appeal process, they were allowed a temporary permit. For about 7 months,
the club continued hosting events. Meanwhile, they decided to do some interior work to the club, unfortunately without the
proper permits. Already nitpicking the club in attempt to find any minute violation, the city grabbed this opportunity, voiding
their certificate of occupancy. This quickly lead way to the closing of this monumental landmark in underground electronic
music culture.
DJMCB spun at Twilo every last Wed. of the month.
Thank You MCB for your help. Now, Casey must vent...
New York’s Cabaret Law was started during the days of Prohibition, and until a few years ago, it had basically been left in the
past, along with the memories of bathtub gin. However, in Mayor Giuliani’s efforts to clean up the city, it has once again been
brought into full effect. This law requires you to own a license
for people to be allowed to dance (or even head-bop, for that
matter) in your venue, and it’s not cheap or easily accessible.
The first and most easy target was St. Mark’s, home to many
small rock and roll venues and stores. If you know what it’s
like to own a small bar with out-of-state live music, in NYC
none-the-less, you know these places were already living bill
to bill, and a day in court means no one to run your club. For
first-hand info on this matter, see the last issue of tric (#11),
and read the Sean Pierce interview, along with the Coney
Island High story, written by Kitty, the owner. First it was
Tramps, then Life, now Twilo, and there’s many more in
between.
Drugs. We’ve got to look at reality, though. Over the past
couple of years, a couple of people have died at Twilo from
alleged drug overdoses. Understand that I am well aware I’m
in no position to tell anyone how to run a venue, but my two
cents is that if you are running a club, and anything other
than the zero-tolerance method is enforced, you are setting
yourself up for a bad situation. You cannot assume people
are smart enough to take care of themselves, because
they’re not. If people outside the scene know your participants
are doing something more than smoking the reefs,
even if it’s before they come into your venue, especially in
these drastic situations, that potentially fatal stigmatism will
remain posted on your front door for the entire world to see,
whether you participate in drug use or not. People are out to
party, and many of them are going to try to get fucked up out
of their gourd. Protect yourself, your club, and your reputation
by doing the right thing...
01001111011010110010101010101011010101010101010101
01010100101011010101110100010101011010111010100010
01110011011100110101001011101000101010101010101110

On the One and Two.
Maginboo
(Drum & Bass, Jungle)
Sao Paolo Collective-"Unlimited Gold" (V Recs)
John B-"What's on Your Mind" (Future Reference LP)
High Contrast-"Passion/Full Intention" (Hospital)
Bad Company-"Dogs on the Moon" (B.C. Recs)
Ray Keith-"Show a Little Respect" (Alien Encounter LP)
Influx Datum-"Forever" (New Identity)
Ray Keith-"Silly Games" (Alien Encounter LP)
Mampi Swift-"Rezurection EP" (Charge)
Total Science-"Blood Money" (V Recs)
John B-"Run out of Time" (Future Reference LP)
*Shout outs go to Magen of Blue Productions,
611 Crew, and Substitution Crew!*
DJMCB (waxstreet.net)
New Order - Crystal (Bedrock Remix) (UK) London
Aquilia - Voodoo (Medway/Praha/Aquilia Remixes) (US) Inversus
John Creamer & Stephane K - I Love You (Hybrid Rmx) (UK) Acetate Ltd.
Bassetti - Ganymede (Robb & Skinner Remix) (US) Grounded
Loafer - Travelogue (UK) Hope
Grayson Shipley - Underwater/Rec Mode (UK) Polyester
Oko Tek - Luminous (Original & Fade Remixes) (UK) Bedrock
Whoda Whodia - Whoda Funk (Future Sound Collective Remix) (UK) Dorigen
Steve Porter - Innerpulse (Original & Fade Remix) (US) Engine
Greed feat. Lesley - Fatal (UK) Beak
FRAZ www.funkfreaks.com
Cozmic Cat’s feline flavors...
Stronger (Rmxs.) - Daft Punk - White
Little L (Bob Sinclair Rmx.) - Jamiroqui - Sony
Sound Travels LP - Nathan Haines - Chilifunk
Cuando (King Britt’s Summer Mix) - Si Se - Giant Step
Chateau Flight (4 Hero Rmx.) - Chateau Flight - Versatile Records
New Comer LP - Llorca - F Communications
Nothing Can Come Between Us (Rmx.) - Sade - White
I Miss You (Rmx.) - Bjork - White
Odyssea 2000 - Fussible - Head+Arm
Have A Nice Day - Roxanne Chante - Cold Chillin’
Blaquee (Club Taboo: Wednesday nights)
Siesta “Future”
Donna Summers “I Want Your Love”
Azulu “Salisa”
Armand Van Helden “Slippin’ Into Darkness”
Siesta “Disko”
Depeche Mode “Dream On (Derrick Carter Mix)”
Lil Louis “Blackout”
G5 “Trouble With Me”
Johnny Vicious “Beat That Bitch w/a Bat”
First Choice “Let No Man Put Us Under”
(Crash & Burn 11pm-1am Sundays on 91.3FM WVUD)
Elite Force / Gasoline Alley / Whole9Yards
Wink / Evil Acid / Ovum
Optimus Prime / Skin Graft / Grid
Electric Birds / The Chase (EP) / Etherdrag
Chris Carter / Clarence Park (CD/LP) / Warp
Avery (Club Taboo: Wed nights, Excalibur: Fri nights)
St. Germain “Rose Rouge” Blue Note
Dan Robbins “D.B.D., Chanting In the Dark” Junior (London)
Dean Coleman “The Depth” Deep Touch
Phono “Keep Control” East/West Recs
Depeche Mode “Dream On (Bushwacka Tough Guy Vocal Mix)” Mute
Celeda “The Underground (DJ Vibe Rmx)” Funktastica
Depeche Mode “I Feel Loved (Danny Tenaglia Labor of Love edit)” Mute
KOT feat. Julie McKnight “Finally (Danny Tenaglia re-edit)” Distance
Danny Tenaglia feat. Liz Torres “Turn Me On (JC’s ChiaPet dub, Kano Rmxs.)” Twisted
Jaimy & Kenny D. “Keep On Touchin’ Me (Eric Morillo edit)” Wildlife/Blackhole
Hey DJs! What’s your current favorite top ten?
Drop me a line and we’ll fit you in next round!
Sean O'Neal (611, tuning spork, fuzzy box, flowchart)
Fairmont - "Mansfield" on Traum
Dialogue - "Top of the Drops EP" on Lofi Stereo
Steve Bug - "A Night Like This Remixes" on Poker Flat Recordings
Steve O'Sullivan - "Rhythms & Dubs vol. 3" on Mosaic
Thomas Brinkmann - "46 Valentino EP" on Max Ernst
Benjamin Wild - "Born to Be" on Festplatten
Akufen - "Psychometry vol. 2" on Trapez
Carl Craig - "The Climax" (Basic Channel rmx) on Planet E
Safety Scissors - "Parts Water" on Plug Research
Vincent Radar - "Broadcast EP" on Sender
SLAMBOOK's
Top Ten Industrial Discs
Plastic Assault- We Score (Bloodline)
Dark Illumination- Dead Planet (Bloodline)
Haujobb- Polarity (Metropolis Records)
Culture Kultur- Revenge (Out Of Line)
Accessory- JUKKA2147.DE (Out Of Line)
Andraculoid- Observations In Human Error (Optikon/DSBP)
Schiller Mit Heppner- Dream Of You (single) (Polydor/Zeitgeist)
Cesium 137- The Fall (single) (Tonedeaf Records)
Davantage- Virus:Hate (Black Raid)
Various Artists- Maschinenwelt Compilation IV (Maschinenwelt Records)
Kidd Terriffick, The Get Down (party)
Cleveland, OH
julius papp “odyssey ep” -yellow
julius papp “excursions” -maxwell2000
aaron douglas “ive been so lonely” -authority
rithma “laughter”-om
mateo&matos--stomp your feet--glasgow underground
maw feat. liliana chachian--brazilian beat--mr bongo
africanism--love is the answer--special
main st. project--all this & heaven too--smokin beats
armand van helden--full moon
eddy grant--electric avenue(ringbang mix)

Artist Spotlight: Chris Trojak
photograph
composition
“Burnt
Reality”,
Chris
Trojak
by: Casey
I remember walking down a Brooklyn Street, having a jovial conversation
about the two types of artists. The first type is those who
produce pieces, and wait to make sure they want people to see
them, often displaying only their favorite and best work. Then there
is the other type: those who show absolutely everything they make,
never considering anything “finished”. Chris is definitely that second
type. He will even admit to it. He has, by far, submitted the most stuff to this zine.
For tric, he has sent reviews, pages and pages of poetry and pictures, and even
things from his friends, like the outstanding Jerky Boys-style prank calls tape. So
what’s new from the guy that gave us “Quakers of Destruction” on his self-run
label “Brown Metal Records”? Well, not surprisingly, there are two things: Retard
TV, an endless tape of short skits featuring tons of biting, chase scenes, karate, a
Shop-Vac as R2D2, fake blood, wigs, smashing stuff, and even Bert of Bert’s CDs
telling kids how to rob a salt mine. Some of it gets a little boring, but that’s what
makes the rest of it so damn funny! I love it! The second thing is his new hip-hop
project, “The Glee Club”, titled “Rocking a Boner in The Ghetto”. This one isn’t
so great. I feel the beats aren’t strong enough, and they drag, and the mix is
inconsistent. It’s got potential, and I suppose that accounts for something. Anyway,
that’s it for now. If you’d like to contact Chris, he is always looking to give submissions
to zines and such, so drop him a line at: jtrojak852@aol.com
The Loss of a
Scene:
A Testimony Concerning Fat Rick's.
Destroying frozen fish. The flicker of
a left eye. The wail of a southbound
train. Ah, hindsight. Being the Lente
I see no other recourse than to lash out
and scream Irish. Fuckers following
the late moon that shines down upon
the Kirkwood. Lente, lente currite
noctis equi. 1 Ain't no Busch about it;
we were all straight Jeremiah Weed.
Murph's and marriage took some.
But, the legacy still lingers. The
imprint of fire above the Brandywine
does not fade when I blink.
Dreamwalker Historian. Getting lost
in the zone. Just you all remember
where Rudy used to sit on Saturday
afternoons as he read the Maximus
Chronicles. You see, I never had a
chance to say goodbye: Nietzsche and
the White Album. Ibanagi and the
light at the end of the tunnel.
Constellation Blowfly. The key of E.
and wisdom of Stale Bread. Now I
know that the Pied Piper of the Creole
is just pretty words to say. As the sun
rose that morning I hit the Pavement
and drove off smiling.
Time goes by, things come and go,
leaving memories that fade to dreams.
And even dreams are long forgotten.
In one time, called the Millennium by
some, a time yet to come, a time long
past, a breeze flew across the kitchen
and cooled the workers from the summer
heat. The breeze was not the end.
There are neither endings nor beginnings
to the turning of time. But, it
was an ending. Fare thee well. We
will consort again.
Consummatum est. 2
-Anderson
1. Run softly, softly horses of the night.
2. It is finished.
Tonedeaf Records is the
home of electronic zine.
elec on
Issues 9 and 10 are now available
for download or your Internet
viewing pleasure*.
*Files are in the form of Adobe pdf. Most
PCs and Macs support this feature.

Hey Delaware Hipsters!
New!
Local Show Reviews, Woah!!!
This issue:
Hokkaido Concern
Yo peeps, John Howard Griffin has been with tric
since day one, and now he’s finally come forth to
spread the word upon yo ass. He said he gonna
run this show review column every issue, so look
for him at yo show and maybe yall get yo name
printed up in dis joint. Stick around, we’ll see if
dis sucka ass gonna stick to his word...Word...
I was moping around my apartment last month when my
friend Linn told me about this indie-rock show at the East
End Cafe in Newark.
Two beers and three hours later, I was watching the
Hokkaido Concern ruin dinner for dozens of unsuspecting
bar patrons.
After two years of blowing out basement parties, the big
HC is finally ready to smack its nimble, prog-punk upside
the general public’s collective ear hole. These obvious
lovers of the Chicago art sound (read Tortoise) have successfully
concocted their own triple malt blend of rhythmic
change ups, inspired guitar work and dynamic drumming.
Poured over a healthy dose of boyish charm, the Hokkaido
Concern is the area’s best sources for brainy, instrumental
rock this side of Steve Albini.
The night I saw them, the four-piece burned through seven
of their newest songs, which carried titles like "Brown
Trousers," "Advanced Theory" and "Chibbin." I know this
sounds stoopid but I could swear their second-to-last jam
"Member Service" contained pieces of the Top Gun original
score! The band’s third, 5-minute plus orchestration,
"4-1-4" layered enough old school metal riffage on top of
sly melodies that one East End regular was heard to
remark, "They sound like a combination of Iron Maiden
and Abba minus vocals." (The East End’s web page even
goes so far as to call them, "what’s right with young musicians"
and "our hope for the future.", but they like the Sin
City Band.)
For the last song, the brothers Ellis switched instruments
without missing a step. Big bro Steve showed that he is just
as versatile on the skins as the ax, while Ryan’s facial contortions
were a show in and of themselves. The band’s final
act of endearment was practically giving away its EP for
the low, low cost of $1. While most of the recorded songs
didn’t make it to the East End, the Hokkaido Concern’s
home-made CD (mine actually has the word "Demo," written
on it) proves they’re just as fun to listen to at home.
With another EP rumored to be on the way, the Hokkaido
Concern are guaranteed to take over the world the minute
they drop out of college.
– John Howard Griffin, i.e. Scott Goss
(fashion)
PART 1: COLLEGE-GIRL BAR GEAR:
SUMMER TOPS
Over the past two summers, I’ve come to have a
problem with two specific tops that women wear.
In the summer of 2000, it was the “V”. You know
the one: that backless spaghetti-strap halter top
that comes to a point at the stomach. I hate that
thing with a passion, especially the one with the
stupid dangling tassels. Even though every lame
bar girl wore one every Friday and Saturday night
last summer, take notice that you don’t see any
of them wearing it anymore because they realized
how dumb they looked wearing it.
Humans are victims of pattern, and following bad
fashion trends to “fit in” is no exception to that
rule. So now, for the summer of 2001, I’ve given
the new award to the single-shoulder stretch tank
top. Yes, that awfully-colored tight shirt with the
too-thick shoulder that swooped down, crushing
and deforming half your boobs, leaving the top
part of them hanging over the shirt is our new
winner. If you were wearing one of these shameful
atrocities this summer and talking to me while
I was pretending to listen, I’d now like you to
know that I was actually dreaming about punching
you in your make-up smeared face. Sorry!
I suppose this is where I have to write something
positive, so here’s a summer fashion tip for all
you women with pimple-back. Don’t wear sunscreen
while laying out on the beach, and let the
sun burn them off while you turn a golden brown.
This little secret is a guarantee for free shots of
Tuaca at the Rusty Rudder. Surf’s Up, babe!
1st Place! This one actually does it a little justice,
but it was the only one I could find on the web.

This is where the reviews start. They’re all done by me,
Casey. Instead of giving personal descriptions of how
the music made me feel like I usually do, I switched to
a more journalistic account. Please let me know what
you think, like if I should change back or something...
Thanks to Nick Silva for help on the finishing touches!
Zen Guerrilla “Shadows On the Sun”
The Delaware swamp-punk boys have got a new one for
you, and don’t worry, it’s good and raunchy, just as expected.
Same amount of rock, metal, and soul, but it’s a little more
bluesy than some past releases, and singer Marcus even
takes a break from singing through his Bell and Howell movie
speaker on the acoustic “Evening Sun”. There’s also this trippy
loop in the midst of it all. Otis Redding- meet Iron Maiden!
Great job once again. Cheers, Gentlemen! (Sub Pop)
The Shins “Oh Inverted World”
All you locals who dig DE’s The Knobs or West Chester’s
Overtones, you should visit The Shins’ inverted world. I initially
passed this one up a couple of months ago, then I finally
broke down to review it, and ended up falling in love with it.
Poppy, melodic rock with major scale hooks from New
Mexico, The Shins became established in 1997 after the dissolution
of Flake (Flakemusic), who date back to 1993. What
I wish ‘alternative’ would change back into... (Sub Pop)
Pleasure Forever “Pleasure Forever”
(Formerly SLAVES, The VSS) This is pretentious goth rock
devil music. They say things like “Meet me in eternity” and
“Rise from the bottomless pit”, and they promote excess,
orgies, and magic. It doesn’t mesh well with the clubbier/keyboard
goth one may expect, because it’s more of a dark
piano/guitar/drums rock trio sounding similar to the Bad
Seeds, except way more cheesy, both musically and lyrically.
I think they’d be fun to see live for the full effect, but it was a
little hard to take seriously from my home stereo. (Sub Pop)
Three 4 Tens “Change Is On It’s Way”
If you’ve ever seen Philly’s Three 4 Tens live, you wonder
how the hell they’re gonna capture onto a CD all the drunken
nervous energy they expend during one of their outrageously
loud and obnoxious shows. Actually, they did something else.
They simply made a great album that rocks steady, and they
still use that mid-60’s Brit-rock sound as a base to work with.
Like I said before, they remind me of the Who or the Stones
when they were still playing basement pubs. I’ve seen them
smash their equipment more than once! (File 13)
Thumbnail “That Static”
After Thumbnail’s break-up three years ago, their last album,
finished in Dec. ‘98 is finally available. It’s really, really fucking
noisy, with lots of Sonic Youth influence. Super tight, it
really shows Thumbnail at their best in terms of songwriting
and playing together as a band. Rumor has it that they’re
even getting back together for a few select shows this fall.
One of my personal picks this round, this is a must-have for
Atombombpocketknife fans. (File 13)
Songs by and for Shannon Yarbrough
“Listen To What I’m Made Of”
On May 5th, 2000, Shannon was driving home on a country
road in Little Rock, AK, and hit a bulldozer mysteriously left
in the middle of the road, and was killed. This double CD
compiles works of both he and and his friends from across
the country. Shannon was in the band Five-O, one of the
earlier bands that grew up with File 13, and also Little Rock
band The Big Cats. While Shannon embraced that empty
southwest singer/songwriter sound, the guests on the second
CD are musicians from various local scenes ranging
from punk to alt-country. (File 13)
Hefner “We Love The City”
Imagine if some guy like Jarvis Cocker of Pulp (Darren
Hayman) suddenly fell head-over-heels in love for some
young coquette, but she fully knows his womanizing ways.
He writes all these beautiful songs for her, begging for forgiveness,
but occasionally slips by saying things like “I can’t
wait to do you on the living room floor”, and woefully blames
his past on the cold city life. While the band plays along,
confused, but not necessarily blindly, and all too well to fit
this silly, English-style melodrama, he throws up his heart,
only to have it kicked around like everyone else. Their video
for “I Took Her Love for Granted” kills any made by Blink-
182, EVER! They’re really naked! (Too Pure/Beggars)

Scannerfunk “Wave of Light by Wave of Light”
Scanner reminds me of electronic projects like Swazak, who
make for great background music at a gallery, in between
bands at a show, or for soundtracking TV commercials or
newer video games. I suppose it’s your prime example of
‘electronica’- light and airy, where you can play the CD and
enjoy it without really delving into it. Interesting beats and patterns,
and it often veers off into IDM. Chillin’. (Sulfer/Beggars)
Brassy “Got It Made”
These bubblegum snappin’ girl/guy punks use break-beat,
hip-hop, and dn’b DJ/drummer DJ Swett to get ultra funky.
Any band with a singer named Muffin and has a song remixed
by Rob Swift deserves to be checked out. Besides, these
guys have already had a ton of successful singles over the
past few years, so check out this full-length. Fans of Sneaker
Pimps should dig on this. You will get jiggy. (Wiija/Beggars)
His Name Is Alive
“Someday My Blues Will Cover the Earth”
Over the past few years, HNIA has been frustrating lots of
goth kids, but this album should, hopefully, solidify what Fort
Lake was migrating towards. If you are not on the up and up
with HNIA’s history, for over 10 years, they have been well
known for their beautifully eerie and ethereal mood-shifting
music. Over the past few years, however, Warn Defever and
his current counterparts have been in transition mode, slowly
evolving into laid-back R&B. This new album really is pretty,
jazzy, and soulful, using the sensuous vocals of Lovetta
Pippen, a Rhodes, some drum programming, and an upright.
A smokey lounge or a cabaret comes to mind. (4AD/Bggrs)
Lush “Ciao!, Best Of”
Like it or not, it’s high-time for a Lush retrospective. Working
backwards, starting with the most recent Lovelife (1996) and
ending with Scar (1992), this 18 song collection does a great
job recapturing Lush’s rocky musical career. From the earlier
days of their rich, full-bodied warmth to their later shimmering
indie-pop classics, this CD is great because it not only has
hard-to-find stuff besides that on Gala, but helps some of the
kids who weren’t around yet to figure
it out. (4AD/Beggars)
The Strokes “The Modern Age”
I think The Strokes sound cool, they
remind me of Velvet Underground
when they rocked out, and they really
do work hard at touring, but over
the past six months, I feel like
they’ve been shoved down my throat.
I think there are so many great
bands doing the same thing as them,
but The Strokes are getting way
more credit for it. I mean, who the
hell gets to tour the world on a 3
song EP? No one. It all smells a little
fishy to me, that’s all. Oh well, I suppose
they don’t need some puny little
fanzine like mine. (XL/Beggars)
shannonwright “Perishable Goods EP”
I think Shannon is more than your average WXPN alt-country
singer/songwriter. Using piano, organ, and unadulterated
guitar as the base of her haunting character, she holds
enough emotion to get me bummed out, which is pretty hard
to do. I’m pretty picky when it comes to this genre, but she
definitely crosses into darker territory, which makes for a
more interesting mix. This limited edition tour EP features
members of Calexico, Low, Rachel’s, and Man...Or
Astroman?. Look for Shannon’s full length Dyed In The
Wool out now. What a nice surprise! (Quarterstick)
Silkworm “Lifestyle”
Trying to review a Silkworm album is like trying to review a
history book on them, because that’s how they play, and it’s
what they play about: going from a quartet to a trio, alcohol,
love, touring, moving away. They’ve all got that slow, downbeat,
muffled Neil Young riffage, but each album seems to fit
their current status, this time being empty and slurred, as
opposed to 1997’s Developer, which was, at least, more
angst driven. Unfortunately, over their 14 years of playing
together, it seems like the DE suburbs have managed to set
aside Silkworm’s ups and downs, and treat them as nothing
more than some indie reference band that toured with
Pavement years ago. This album came out August last year,
but it’s worth the mention- check it out. (Touch and Go)
The New Year “Newness Ends”
This is the Kadane Bros.’ first excursion since Bedhead’s
break-up in 1998, and it’s a winner. Though the vocals still
sound a little sleepy and boyishly monotone, the music
seems to have rubbed it eyes and woken to a little more
rock. However, it hasn’t had it’s morning cup of joe yet. The
guitars have a sound like Pavement, but more straight forward,
and they’ve recruited Codeine’s drummer Chris
Brokaw. Though it does meander a little, it’s more structured
and song oriented than Bedhead, but don’t worry, it’s still
laid back, just not as sedated. (Touch and Go)
(more reviews next page!)

Shipping News
“Very Soon, and In Pleasant Company”
Loose and jangley drums and guitar, occasionally complimented
with emotional strings and piano makes this album
feel like it’s got some fuzzy, dull glow of memories or past
visions that meander in your head over and over. The overall
feeling of the album is like some foggy, recursive thought of
an awesome dream you had, but can’t exactly put your finger
on, and it starts to piss you off. Shipping News is Kyle and
Jason of Rachel's, and Jeff of June of 44. (Quarterstick)
Tara Jane O’Neil “In The Sun Lines”
Very relaxing and hypnotic, yet foolingly uneasy. Very slow
with lots of rich layers and double voice-overs, O’Neil (The
Sonora Pine, Retsin, Rodan) definitely starts with a singer/
songwriter base, but develops it into something more of a
dreamscape, where development is left open to chance, and
minimal melodies and continuous loops are abundant. The
harmonium reminds me a little of Kenda Smith, but more full.
It’s a very pretty album, yet it remains dark. (Quarterstick)
The Album Leaf “One Day I’ll Be On Time”
This is Jimmy Lavalle of Tristeza, and while his last album
with them was, as they used in their title, ‘circular’, I think
you’ll find this one more along a linear path. While keeping in
the tradition of instrumental, trippy, open key jams, these
ditties seem to evolve as if you’re walking down a path, and
the scenery changes as you go. This whole album was
recorded, mixed, and produced by Jimmy himself, though he
had some help with the beats and mastering. (Tigerstyle)
Aspra Ad Astra / Lilys (split EP)
This came out a while ago, but who cares? Not me! Four
Lilys songs from ‘93 and ‘94, recorded in Philly, and 4 new
Aspra songs, who reside in Philly. While Lilys hide their
ghost-like vocals with tons of reverb and distortion-drenched
guitars, Aspra does quite the opposite, keeping them frontal,
backed by a twangy, tremolo guitar. As far as Lilys songs,
these ones are instant favorites, and I’m glad they are mixed
with a newer band like Aspra. The cover art is weird, I can’t
look at it. It creeps me out. Aspra (no more Ad Astra) just
released a full-length on Big Wheel Recreation. (Tigerstyle)
The Mercury Program
“All the Suits Began to Fall Off”
This instrumental album could be a cross between jazz and
more repetitious math-rock like Don Cab, but a little more
laid back. Erratic drumming, a vibraphone, and electric piano
remind me of some of the free jazz from the early 70’s, but
they keep their cool, even when they turn on the fuzz box.
Nice cello work in “The Secret to Quiet”. Coming from
Gainsville, Florida, this is their second full length; the other is
available on Boxcar, as well as some 7”s. (Tigerstyle)
Low / K (Karla of Ida) (split EP)
Four songs, two for each group, this EP is also available as
a 7”, which only has one song each. All songs are exclusive
for this release. The Low songs are a little lighter than some
of their other material, and they focus on male vocal. Both
Low songs are recorded by Warn (His Name Is Alive) at his
Time Studio, and one K song mixed by him also. All of the
songs are somewhat dreamy, folky, and acoustic. (Tigerstyle)

Ida “The Braille Night”
Ida are definitely more folk than anything else, however, what
makes them cool is that there is lots of everything else. You’ll
definitely hear some Mojave 3 or Low style in the mix. What’s
interesting is that there are 8 people in the group, and they
all seem to have some major influence on the band’s wellcomposed
sound of vocal harmonies, piano, guitar and other
various strings, and percussion. (Tigerstyle)
K (Karla of Ida) “New Problems”
You could possibly consider this a stripped down Ida (see
above review), sans all the male vocals. Lots of other guests
including Tara Jane O’Neil, as well as some from Ida. Most of
the songs have only two or three people doing piano, guitar,
drums, and female vocal. There’s also some scratchy tape
loops and things to make the recording more interesting. All
12 songs are like a darker folk- a little empty and mournful,
ethereal and hollow. (Tigerstyle)
The American Analog Set “Know By Heart”
This is good driving music. This is what is playing when
you’re driving your car on a long, straight road through the
Nebraska wheat fields with the windows down. I like the
drums on this album, they remind me of good CCR (not the
music at all), and they’ve upped the tempo some. The music
is reminiscent of their past albums, all sort of dry and distant,
almost unemotional, and they use less farfisia (the Stereolab
sound). It seems to go through a sort of filter. They’re in song
mode on this one, but there’s still some jams. (Tigerstyle)
Minus “Jesus Christ Bobby”
This album blows my mind. I fucking love it! It’s got elements
of Ozzfest without the cheese, and hints of death metal without
being overbearing. While listening to them, Iceland’s
Minus wants you to vision that cracked, barren wasteland
they call home, using screeching demonic vocals and ripping
guitars, as well as some interesting samples and effects.
While maintaining metal riffs that are essentially catchy, they
still remain abstract and unique. To top it all off, Einar Orn of
the Sugarcubes helped out. * A personal pick! (Victory)
Grade “Head First, Straight To Hell”
This Canadian quintet has become a staple for what most
refer to as emotional-hardcore-metal. The guitars use that
80’s metal/rock crunchy distortion riff sound, while singer
Kyle Bishop trades off melodies with controlled screaming
and yelling. The album has been banned from Best Buy
because of the cover art. It’s got this winged puppetmaster/
joker demon chic with star pasties over her nip-nips. (Victory)
Thumb “3”
For all you old-school skaters who can remember Santa Cruz
and Madrid’s heyday, you should remember the name Claus
Grabke, that funny German guy with the crazy hairdo. Nuskoolers
might remember the 1998 Warped Tour, when
Americans first started taking notice to Thumb’s hip-hop influenced
hardcore. Since 1993, over in Germany, these guys
have been doing that of Linkin Park or some of their other
MTV2 counterparts, but backed by a DJ and fronted by a pro
skater. This is their second US release from Victory. (Victory)

Darkest Hour “So Sedated, So Secure”
With a pounding double kick drum, these guys cross hardcore
and punk with doses of dark speedmetal / grindcore. It’s
got a very heavy sound, but at the same time melodic from
the use of two guitars that work well together, and the growling
mid-range vocals make everything sound really gritty.
Combined together, it ought to make for a nasty pit. (Victory)
The Dickies “All This and Puppet Stew”
The Dickies are simply a staple, funny punk band. They’ve
been around forever, have a bunch of albums, and they’ve
still got tons of energy. The high-pitched vocals remind me of
DK’s Jello Biafra, but WAY less political- they’d rather make
fun of a donut man or Courtney Love. The music is original
pop punk- more on the punk side. OK, maybe they get a little
political on “My Pop the Cop”. Ha, ha, ha... (Fat Wreck)
Snuff “Blue Gravy:Phase 9 (10”)”
Clear Blue Vinyl! OK, these guys from England are really
loud, fast hardcore combined with really, really, really noisy
and distorted pop-punk. There’s cool harmonies, and the
noise surely overrides any whininess that might come with
the territory. Wait a minute, I even hear a Hammond B-3 and
a horn section. Holy Shit! There’s some funk jams, too.
Woah, this gets interesting! * Personal Pick! (Fat Wreck)
Citizen Fish “Life Size”
Man, these guys’ accents are so thick! Again, Citizen Fish
have been around forever. You can picture what they sound
like just by imagining an English pub, and everyone is
chanting along with Dick, Phil, Jasper, and Trotsky, screaming
“Where’s the revolution now?”. Tight punk riffs and drums
mixed with just the right touch of ska make good for this
rowdy bunch of original political punkers. (Honest Don’s)
Inspection 12 “In Recovery”
This is definitely way more alterno-guitar pop than punk. The
first few songs sound like something from the ‘Friends’
soundtrack, then they evolve into something a little more hip
and fast you might hear on cable. It’s not all plastic, thoughthere’s
still some rawness to make it fun, and they definitely
act a little humble, which is good, because most bands that
go for this sound are obnoxious egomaniacs. (Honest Don’s)
Heavenly “Heavenly vs. Satan”
Originally released in 1990, this is Heavenly’s first album,
which has been out of print for the last 7 years, and was
never released in the US until now, plus it includes 3 singles
w/ their b-sides. It’s cute, maybe sort of like a poppier Lush,
but LOTS more bouncy, peppy, and upbeat, maybe even a
little 60’s mod, with a tight snare and hi-hat. The trebly, highrange
melodies are mostly picked major guitar chords. It’s
definitely dated, but it’s still loads of fun! (K Records)
Old Time Relijun “Witchcraft Rebellion”
Bouncy, out-of-tune guitars, an overzealous, nonsensical
sax, and monkey-style, pounding drums that almost resemble
ska accompany this freak shreaking and spitting about
vampire motels, vampire sushi, and taking off his head in a
grocery store. Though singer Dionyso is usually screeching
about frogs or something, his voice sometimes lowers and
sounds like Popeye. I personally thought this album was
really funny, but some out there consider it complete shit. (K)

The Microphones “The Glow Pt. 2”
Phil Elvrum, the main microphone, has been working hard,
because this CD totals in at 20 songs in 67 minutes, just a
year after his last full length. The Microphones use a cool
muffled yet distorted sound, making everything around you
seem off-balanced, all the small and quiet things seem loud.
It continuously contrasts itself, sounding cheap yet important,
and useless yet invaluable. In other words he makes nothing
seem like everything, and vice versa. Great recording techniques
and wide variety of instruments. (K Records)
Modest Mouse “Sad Sappy Sucker”
If you read this zine, survey says you at least know who
Modest Mouse is. This is their never-released first studio
album, recorded back in 1994 by Calvin Johnson at Dub
Narcotic, plus a bunch of short songs made by Issac Brock
in his amateur Dial-A-Song studio around the same time. As
expected, Isaac’s voice sounds really young, and more squirrely
than ever. The songs themselves are still catchy, yet
also very youthful. Overall, if you like MM, this will be a fun
album for you, but if you’re new, I’d recommend trying out
some of their more mature releases before you hear this. (K)
The Rondelles “Shined Nickels and Loose Change”
American teenage unisex garage punk flourishes, and it’s
name is The Rondelles. Distorted bass, guitar, and cool
female vocal, mixed up with a guy who plays drums standing
up, using one hand, while banging out notes on a Casio keyboard
with the other, AND screaming background vocals into
his mike all at once makes they’re live set nice and rough,
and lots of fun to just hang out and head-bop. This album is
just as useful to get you a go-go-going in the morning, or to
get you psy-psy-psy-psyched up to get out of the house and
have a great time. Lots of Heys and Yeahs! (K Records)
Beat Happening “Crashing Through (Box Set)”
In case you didn’t know, Beat Happening is the backbone of
Olympia, WA’s K Records. As a condensed history, Calvin,
Heather, and Brett started playing as a lo-fi punk band in the
early 80’s, and kept going until the mid 90’s, meanwhile running
a label to self-release their albums, which has grown
into one of the finer indie labels and recording studios of
today. This 7 CD set captures all of their full lengths, plus
some singles and such. Their basic guitar-drums-vocal
sound didn’t change too much over the years, and Calvin’s
low bass voice is definitely for selective ears, but the charming
simplicity of it all, along with the memorable lyrics, lasts
in the hearts of many. (K)
Erik Sanko “Past Imperfect, Present Tense”
This is the first solo album from former bassist of NY’s
Lounge Lizards, as well as his own band, Skeleton Key, and
the sound is very uncomfortable pop. It sounds like it was
meant to be normal, listenable WXPN songwriter-style
music, but during recording, some demon not only got into
the tape reels, eerily slowing and speeding them up and
down, but also swirled into his head, making him say and
play some pretty bizarre things. It’s sorta spooky! (Jetset)
Firewater “Psychopharmacology”
Firewater’s 3rd release is filled with pills, suicide, and irony.
While the words poke fun at airplane crashes, God, and
other things that revolve around death, the music is definitely
‘band’ like- utilizing flashy alternative guitar hooks and a
raspy voice. This is getting great reviews from other critics,
but it’s a little too ‘jaded rock star’ for my tastes. Fans of
Guided by Voices might enjoy this one. Firewater is led by
Tod A, for those who remember the early 90’s punk/ industrial
band Cop Shoot Cop. (Jetset)

Label Spotlight:
For Philadelphia’s Nancy Boy Records (AKA Chris Engineer),
it all started in the very late 90’s with a V/A punk tape of his
friends’ bands, titled “How To Master Gung-Fu”. From there,
1999 saw two 7’s, both splits featuring two bands each. The
first 7” (NBR02) features Cleveland, Ohio’s “Uncle NO!”, a
rapcore band that definitely fits the bill with some of the more
popular MTV bands like Papa Roach. The guitars in the first
song sound like Rage Against the Machine. Though they disbanded
about 4 years ago, some members are now in Run
Devil Run, on Victory Recs. The other side is the band “82nd
Floor”, who also disbanded a while back, which is Chris and
his friends from 1998. Both songs are recorded pretty badly,
possibly on a boom box, but the music is still decent, and
sounds like some punky metal kids having a good time, so
be it. The second 7” (NBR03) has Kentucky’s “Redheaded
Stepchildren”, who just broke up. They’re cool greaser-style
punk with upbeat hooks, reminiscent of Social Distortion.
Again, the other side is another of Chris’ bands “Enlist”. It
was a nice suprise to hear a female vocal. The quality of the
recording is basically still live basement-style with a couple of
mikes, but the music is tighter and more melodic.
Now two years later (‘01), Nancy Boy has released a threeway
split CD featuring Pittsburgh’s “McCarthy Commission”
and two of Philly’s better hardcore punk bands, “Autotrophs”
and “Kids United”. Maximum Rock n’ Roll (Sept. ‘01) gave
this a shining review, and I do as well. If you follow the PA
hardcore punk scene, or want a taste, this is the perfect CD
to pick up. 15 songs- 5 each. All the songs are full battle
cries and really political, talking about everything from class
wars to capital punishment to censorship to neo-Naziism. For
hardcore punk, this one hits the nail on the head.
As with anything, use a little persistence and hard work, and
things will begin to grow and flourish, and so goes with
Nancy Boy Records. In the near future, Nancy Boy is set to
release a Low Budgets 7” (ex-members of the Dead Milkmen
and Town Managers) titled "Go Bargain Hunting with the Low
Budgets". It’s going to be colored vinyl, and only 300 will be
pressed and numbered, and keeping in the punk rock tradition,
the street date has been posted as indefinite. Chris has
also talked about projects with the likes of De La Hoya, The
Insurgent, Pull 130, and Always the Victim, but nothing is
official as of yet, and his current band ‘Tell-Tale-Heart’ (plus
othe ex-members of Enlist) is working on a demo.
For more information on Nancy Boy Recs or these releases,
you can contact Chris at:
Nancy Boy Records
3143 Olympia Place
Philadelphia, PA 19145
chris@nancyboyrecords.com www.nancyboyrecords.com
David Candy “Play Power”
Who is David Candy? The mysterious man who so elegantly
contemplates Vladimir Mayakovsky and mafarca pudding.
Don’t worry, he’ll look after you, he understands you, you’ll
never feel abandoned again. He knows you’ve been searching
for him, reach out you hand, and you’ll find... Ian
Svenonius of the Make Up! During “Diary of a Genius”, a 19minute
beatnik jam, Ian goes off on purposely idiotic and
overly pretentious prose, which got tons of laughs out of me.
The last song is a goofy version of "Komeda's Lullaby", from
Rosemary’s Baby. If you don’t know this is a high-brow 60’s
throwback joke, you’re going to want to smash this CD
against the wall, but if you’re prepared, you’ll be laughing
your ass off. (Jetset)
Black Box Recorder “The Worst Of...
The Complete B-Side and Video Collection”
As the title says, this is a collection of their singles and four
unedited videos. Imagine a more obscure, chilled-out Robert
Palmer (the 80’s suit guy), but infatuated with puberty, and
life’s letdowns. These monotone Brits have had many-a-lyric
banned on radio and MTV, most notably a line from the song
Child Psychology: "Life is unfair; kill yourself or get over it."
Minimal synthetic drum beats and sparse guitars give a very
sober feeling. Some of the covers include Bowie’s “Rock n’
Roll Suicide” and Terri Jacks’ “Seasons In The Sun”. The
highlight is the video for “The Art of Driving”, in which they
dress up like crash test dummies. (Jetset)
These releases available through: Mail order, Nancy Boy website, Local record shops, the bands’ shows, & smaller distros

The Ivory Coast “Clouds”
I think the title of this CD is misleading, because nowhere on
this album is there some cloudy dreaminess you might
expect. In actuality, Ivory Coast does nothing but have fun
rocking out. This is good, standard indie guitar rock, without
much new or innovative going on. However, you can’t deny
that the songs are undoubtedly catchy and listenable pop, a
little reminiscent of bands like Silkworm. I dig it. (Polyvinyl)
Owen “Owen”
Owen is the solo project of Mike Kinsella, who over ten years
has been in well-known projects like Owls, American Football,
Joan of Arc, and Cap’n Jazz. This album is mostly layered
acoustic fingerpicking with some background guitar and
synth noise, occasionally surrounded by light electronic beats
that flutter around like little little glowing orbs. The vocals are
also very full bodied and textured using some after-effects.
Written, played, recorded, and produced by Mike himself.
Overall, this is well thought-out, and very relaxing. (Polyvinyl)
AM/FM “Getting Into Sinking”
AM/FM is mainly Philly’s Brian Sokel (Franklin) and Mike
Parsell (Goodbye Blue Monday, The Science Of), plus Terry
Yerves helping out and producing, and tons of other Philly
hipsters filling in on bass, guitar, vocals, keyboards and whatever
else deems itself appropriate to create an album full of
trippy, acoustic mish-mash. The album ranges from upbeat to
chanting, and you can’t really put a finger on any direct style,
except that it’s fairly soothing, and there’s lots of things going
on under the face of it. While Brian writes most of the songs,
and plays guitar and sings, Michael mostly sticks to the drum
set. The production makes this album a real treat. (Polyvinyl)
Owls “Owls”
If you liked earlier Joan of Arc, and wish they had sped up
rather than drifting off into sparse guitar minimalism, then this
should please you. Owls was the pre-teen pre-existence of all
things Joan of Arc, Cap’n Jazz, Ghosts and Vodka, American
Football, but they broke up in ‘94, never releasing an album.
Now all a little more mature, everyone recently pulled back
together to make this new album, and it’s damn tight. Victor
Villarreal’s technical jazzy guitar playing really livens things
up, putting Mike Kinsella’s drumming to the test. (Jade Tree)
Milemarker “Anaesthetic”
Blend melodic hardcore with new wave synths, mechanical
and grinding post rock, cold girl/guy vocals, and an indescript
bright pink album cover and you’ve got something in between
jarring and novelty. Over the past 4 years, their stated goal
has been to re-create hardcore that moves you like it did
before it became pre-packaged. While the lyrics reflect on a
dark machine future, there are parts where it gets very 80’s
goth, which is fine, except they won’t admit it. (Jade Tree)
Strike Anywhere “Change Is a Sound”
Straight-forward Richmond, VA hardcore punk full of sing
along anthems. Singer Thomas Barnett has has kind of a
high, raspy screamy voice, and the fast drumming and guitars
have almost a tight pop-punk edge. The lyrics are better than
those of your average political punk guy, and they actually
captured my interest by being grassroots and pro-union,
hence the name ‘strike anywhere’. They yell about taxes
instead of bombs, so I suppose you could call this a sort of
working-man’s uprising. (Jade Tree)
Atombombpocketknife “Gog Bless The ABPK”
ABPK have added another guitarist, Che Arthur (the sound
engineer for Don Cab, Trans Am, Cinerama), which means
two new things have happened. On this new full length, there
are less ‘starts and stops’, or breaks, which is why I loved
Alpha Sounds, their last album. However, because of the
addition, this album is more textured, and it allows them freedom
for more exploration. It’s not a bad thing, but it’s a
change none-the-less. It’s still harsh, noisy, and dissonant as
ever. (Southern, PO Box 577375, Chicago, IL 60657)
cEvin Key “the gHost of eAch room”
In keeping with the tradition of his well-composed synthesized
and industrialized soundscapes, the most noticeably
unexpected thing on this CD is the tweaked and ripped up
hip-hop beats. As the album literally floats around chill keyboard
experimentations then explodes into electronic freakouts,
there is no doubt still some Skinny Puppy left in cEvin’s
blood. I thoroughly enjoyed the guests like Nivek Ogre,
Edward Ka-Spel and others from the Pink Dots. (Metropolis)
Haujobb “Polarity”
So, was the this CD worth the wait? I’d say so. There are so
many different elements on this album, and they are all mixed
together in a very satisfying fashion. Combining their patented
terrifying minimalistic landscapes mixed with German tech
beats and good old never-fail industrialism, portions of this
are actually danceable, as opposed to some of their more
experimental past albums. Track 8 even gets a little funky
with a Mouse on Mars-style. Never fear though- there are still
plenty of breaks where Haujobb play with those strange
sound effects that make your face twitch. (Metropolis)

Peter Murphy “aLive Justforlove” (2xCD)
I’ve never seen Peter Murphy in concert, and the Bauhaus
reunion a couple of years ago sold out in like 10 minutes, so
even though some of you may think this album is ridiculously
cheesy, I’m lovin’ it. There’s no doubt he’s still got his pipes,
and he’s right on pitch, so damn it, if I want to be sentimental,
what better way go out then by bowing down to the Prince of
Goth? Technically, this recording is crystal clear. It starts out
with just Peter, then guitar (Peter Distefano), then an electric
violin (Hugh Marsh), no drums. It’s all pretty minimal.
Recorded at the El Rey Theatre in L.A. on November 31st,
‘00. The second CD is Peter and David J doing Bauhaus’
Who Killed Mr. Moonlight, All We Ever Wanted, and Hope,
and an Elvis’ Love Me Tender, all acoustic. (Metropolis)
Rambient “So Many Worlds”
This duo is Peter DiStefano (Porno for Pyros) and film composer
Harry Gregson-Williams (Shrek, Armageddon, Enemy
of the State, Spy Games). If you’re picturing guitar-based
commercial (yet highly emotional, mind you) techno ready to
be packaged and shipped to MTV2, you’ve hit the nail right
on the head. It’s bursting out of it’s seams with guest appearances
including Peter Murphy (see above review), Cibo
Matto’s Miho Hatori, hip-hop master Divine Styler, and Flea
(yes, Flea). If you like bands like Chemical Bros. or newer
Moby, but much more chilled out, this is your joint. I was personally
scared out of my wits. Only in Hollywood my friends...
(Immergent, 2231 S. Carmelina Ave., West LA, CA 90064)
sketch by: Juliet L. Salvato
Couch “Profane”
The jams on this instrumental album are a little more slowed
down, and focus more on the downbeat, as opposed to their
last one, Fantasy, which was more groovable and traveling.
The often heavy percussion is very predominant and up
front, and they focus on more minor keys this time. Couch
use a great production technique to make them sound sort
of dull or ‘grounded’, like they’re some machine trying to
learn emotions, or they’ve got this dead weight they’re trying
to lift, and I love the use of the old electric piano. Those
crazy Germans! * A personal pick this round! (Matador)
Bardo Pond “Dilate”
Bardo Pond is one of the fucking noisiest bands, ever.
They’ve got so much distortion and feedback that if you go
see them live, everyone’s hair starts standing up off their
heads. Imagine if Dirty Three doubled into six, and the new
members brought along the blues bomb TM , 750 effects pedals,
and Isobel (singer/flautist/violinist), who moans away like
there’s an opium den backstage. I’ve seen the Pond tear it
up with Mogwai more than once, so that’s gotta say something.
Bardo Pond is definitely one of the better fringe benefits
of living near Philly. You can see them at the Khyber w/
American Analog Set on Friday, Oct. 21st. No lie, I’ve
already blown up a set of speakers with this CD! (Matador)
Flowchart “Wishworm tracks”
Flowchart (aka Flowtron when live) is Philly’s Sean O’Neal
and Erin Anderson. My first instinct of this CD was the feeling
of when you eat mushrooms- everything gets all mushy
and watery, but feels like it’s exploding at the same time.
While Sean is known for his tracky, techhie DJ sets, this one
is more bouncy and cartoonish. Maybe you could relate the
mushroom thing to some funky, bugged-out, demented
Super Mario Bros. dream. This is perfect computer head
music, great for doing homework. Very well-structured, this
is proof that Flowchart has been around the block once or
twice. Available only as a UK import, I’m pretty sure you can
pick it up at 611. (Endorphin, www.enrapturedrecords.com)
Atom and His Package “Redefining Music”
Dear Atom, when are you going to write a song about me? I
put a picture of you in my fanzine holding a Flower Soup
sign and I’ve chit-chatted with you through e-mail. I only live
like 20 minutes away from you, and I’ve gone to your shows,
like Franklin’s last all-ages show and the punk rock prom in
Delaware this summer. I even visit File 13’s website when
you say there’s an update. WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO???
C’mon, I’ll come over to your place, and we’ll jump all over
the room and get all goofy and do rock star poses. I’ll even
help you program the Package if you want me to. Wadda ya
say? (Hopeless Recs., PO Box 7495, Van Nuys, CA 91409)
Tight Bros From Way Back When “Lend You A Hand”
This is 100%, 100 mph, guitar-slingin’, ass shakin’ rock-nroll.
Straight-up 70’s rock, baby, no perpetratin’ here. Thank
God for the track listing, or I would have no idea what this
guy is saying besides a bunch of Alright!s, Yeah!s, Whoo!s,
and everything else you need to get a killer rock album. Oh
yeah, don’t forget the Whaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!s.(Kill Rock Stars,
120 NE State St. PMB 418, Olympia, WA 98501)
That’s it for my CD review section, see you next time!!!

Metal Radio 91.3WVUD late Thu 1am, Sat 9 pm, Metal Television- VidDREAM Comcast ch. 28 Fri at 9:30 pm
TOP ‘20’ TRACKS
Artist Title Track
1.Reveille Bleed the Sky
2.Adema Everyone
3.Six Feet Under The day the dead walked
4.Dragonlord Unholy Void
5.No One Down On Me
6.Dry Kill Logic Nightmare
7.Soil Halo
8.Rollins Band One Shot
9.System of a Down Prison Song
10.Switched Inside
11.Darkest Hour So Sedated
12.Slipknot Heretic Song
13.P.O.D. Alive
14.Primer 55 This Live
15.Nullset Speechless
16.Slayer God Send Death
17.Ill Nino Reveolution
18.Life in a burn clinic Torso Farm
19.Neurosis Sun Never Sets
20.Biohazard Demolition
TOP ‘40’ TRACKS
Artist Title Track
21.American Headcharge All Wrapped Up
22.Twister Sister Tribute
23.Santa sangre Bury Your Dreams
24.Sparklightsfriction Dream Apnea
25.Fear the Clown Frozen
26.Spineshank Full Circle
27.Impotentseasnakes Slam Ya
28.Nora Losers Institution
29.Everytime I die Jimmy Tangos Method
30.Flaw Only The Strong
31.Puddle of Mudd Control
32.Beautiful Creatures I Got It All
33.Drill 187 Despise
34.Jag Panzer Frozen In Fear
35.Zeni Geva Blatsphere
36.Mesuggah Elastic
37.Real By Design Leave My Mark
38.Lift (6) 18 Wrong
39.Hellspawn Carnal Desires
40.Stuck Mojo 10 Years
new alternative website! geocities.com/thetinksinc/TheTINK.htm (case sens.)
INDIEFEST 2001 Saturday, September 22nd, 2001
Come Help Keep Metal Alive!
featuring: VON KULL, 4 FINGER JOHNNY, ON ASHEN WINGS,
SOLUM, LOWDOWN, THUNDERBREW, and TRUE ZERO HOOK.
Tickets: $7, $10 @ Gate. (parking $5) Opens: 2:30, first band at 4!
Uncle Bob’s Concert Park- Elkton, MD. (Rain or Shine)
Just minutes from Newark, DE! For Dirctns: Uncle Bob’s: (410) 392-3195
hometown.aol.com/vonkullweb vonkull@aol.com Von Kull: (302)834-0457
tric! presents:
THE
(CONDENSED)
TINK’S
INK
SETTLE DOWN TINK,
WE’LL LET YOU OUT OF
YOUR CAGE IN THE NEXT
ISSUE!!!
Ladies and Gentleman, meet
YOUR ADMINISTER OF SINISTER

Zine Abudanza!
Here is a small list of zines you may find interesting.
You may notice this section is a little smaller for this
issue, though I actually had the opportunity to make
it grow more. I neglected to do so because I got so
much music to review, I simply didn’t want to half-ass
anybody, so instead I was a little choosy. Check out:
www.livejournal.com/community/zine_scene for tons
of zines. There’s over 100 some members now, and
most do at least one zine, if not more. Here we go...
Get The Strap (#2): These two wingnuts make fun of everybody!
There’s a cool article on how latchkey kids are smarter
than regular kids, and for me that brought back some crazy
childhood memories. Hey, it’s not our fault we act this way,
it’s only because our babysitter was cable TV! There’s an evil
recreation of TV’s “Saved By The Bell”, & other rants on how
TV rots the brain. (243 Sedgewick Ave., Stratford, CT 06615)
Moxie (#14, “The Shallow Issue”): This issue is soooo
funny! She goes completely overboard, talking about her hair,
make-up, pants, hair again, shoes, hair again, shirts, the gap,
and then, of course, herself. She even made the zine itself
tall and skinny! Suzie always does great comics, and even
most of the writing is done meticulously by hand. Love it,
babe! (330 Reed St. 2F, Philadelphia, PA 19147)
Dance Harder (#?): This photocopied zine focuses on raves,
dangers of K, dehydration from dancing, plus some interesting
general tid-bits on people’s garbage, capital punishment,
Bob Moog, and some other self-promotional DJ stuff like their
record label and such. This is a fun, easy read, with a
smooth layout. (7 Creek Road, Camp Hill, PA 17011)
Toxic Shock Syndrome (#?): It doesn’t get much better
than this death metal personal zine. Check out the bio from
one of kids doing the zine- Likes: being alone, staying away
from you, hurting you, and eventually killing you.
Dislikes: you. Personal Motto: I hate you. Life Long
Dream: To kill you. Drug of preference: free drugs...etc, etc.
(482 S. Franklin St. Apt. #3B, Wilkes-Barre, PA 18702)
Tainted Playground Video zine (#1): This is awesome! The
video’s got a cool interview with The Bangs, plus this little ‘art
film’, which includes eggs, an oven, and a can of Tab. The
paper zine’s got some killer short fiction, and a survey where
everyone loses! It’s made by a few people, so it’s not slanted
in any direction. The poetry and rants are pretty cool, too.
(591Jewell St., Ferndale, MI 48220)
Survivor (Vol. 12, #5): Imagine if your dad is a WWII veteran
who collects guns and knives, complains about taxes, and
drives a pick-up. Now, imagine him writing a photocopied cutand-paste
zine. Now, imagine your mom helping him. There’s
a ton of interesting info in here, but I felt they were too intimidating
by giving a real survey that no one under 28 years old
could pass. (1115 45th Ave., Long Island City, NY 11101)
Thrift Store Vampire (#?): This is a very-well laid out skate
zine from Philly. It’s mostly picture collages of dudes ripping it
up at skate parks all over the country. It’s made by local
Scott Minton, and I offered him a column for TSV, so hopefully
we can get some skateboarding up in this joint. This zine is
rad! (1801 N. Howard St., 4th Flr., Philadelphia, PA 19122)
Printing
Etiquette
Whether on paper or the internet, press can result in a
very satisfying form of self-expression. It is a great way to
make friends with like interests, get lots of free entertainment
of various media, and many times you get to meet
people you admire. Depending on how you go about your
business, it can also become a huge pain in the ass.
Many of you who I’ve talked with about this zine know
that I try to remain modest by keeping a free, open-minded
relationship with all of those who submit material, and try
not to be bureaucratic. I do my best to understand their
needs, and try to accommodate them. I try to be involved in
their submissions by making sure they’re accurate, and
though I sometimes do the wrong thing, I do my best not to
step on anyone’s toes, and apologize when I do.
I’ll never forget the time about a year and a half ago
when I used someone’s art without permission. He was
pissed off, and we had some words. I personally and publicly
apologized for my mistake and conduct, and we
became on good terms again. He even went on to do a
cover for tric, and pleasantly offered any future work as an
artist with me. I’m glad it’s over with, it really sucked.
In their summer issue, our local “bar circuit” magazine
Big Shout used a wrong picture for the Philly band “Tapping
the Vein”, accidentally substituting a photo of another local
band, also reviewed on that page. That’s a sort of action
that makes me wonder if the editor cares what is being said,
or if he just wants the pages filled with words and ads.
Maybe I’m just bitter because I really like Tapping the Vein,
and I used to play music with the people that were in the
mistaken picture, one of whom used to work for Big Shout.
Right now, there are two guys fighting over the property
of words and territory. The story goes like this: Justin of
Wonkavision magazine (ex-Philly zine en route to Denver)
had a kid named Travis from Washington work on his new
website, for free. In the meantime, Justin was also hooking
this kid up with free stuff like promos and guest list spots so
Travis could interview bands for Wonkavision. Justin complained
he wasn’t working fast enough on the site, so went
into the Wonkavision server to see what the problem was,
and found that Travis was hosting his and his friends’ own
sites, without Justin’s permission. Meanwhile, Travis’s interviews
had taken place (Pedro the Lion, Wesley Willis, and
Starflyer 59), and since the two obviously had words and
actions not worth delving into, Travis became unwilling to
give the interviews to Justin. Travis found a new webhost,
and posted his new site and interviews. Remembering how
easy it is to simply cut-and-paste off the web, Justin took the
interviews and used them in both the paper edition and the
web version of the magazine. He didn’t give Travis credit for
the PTL interview in the mag, and on the web, he posted the
PTL interview giving Travis credit, but on the link to the actual
piece, he referred to it as boring and monotone.
This is, by all means, the kind of shit from which I want
to stay far, far away. If I do something to piss you off, please
bring it to the table right away, as that is the best and quickest
way to resolution. Don’t dick around, let’s just enjoy ourselves.
That’s the only reason I do any of this stuff! It’s fun!

Welcome to Monster Mix,
the hip-hop column from
our own Regular Size
Monster, Gentle Jones.
Though this column is
usually dedicated to an
in-depth account of one
particular artist, this
round Mr. Jones decided
to lay down two minireviews
of his favorite
new releases. Check it...
Cannibal Ox "The Cold Vein"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Released amidst acclaim and chaos, Cannibal Ox (Vordul Megallah
and Vast Aire Kramer) drop a gritty NYC spitball with otherworldly
production courtesy of El Producto. This album represents the essence
of the modern Big Apple with its full bodied flavor and keen street
level delivery. Seamless and airtight, the strongest track "Vein" begins
with Vordul's steady cadence of animal imagery "pop goes the flow
with a weasel strapped with an ox full of diesel trapped in the desert
with eagles thoughts of ghetto accapellas in cathedrals spilling heavy
gospels with cheetahs" For fans of El-P's impressive body of work this
album represents his musical genius at its best, with rich sonic textures
and knocking drum patterns. Also, Vasts
lyrical performance on "Painkillers" certainly sets
himself apart as perhaps the most clever writer
in the Atoms Family. 100% bonafide American
music classic, NY will never be the same.
Saul Williams "Amythest Rock Star"
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Saul Williams has made quite a name for himself
within spoken word circles. Alaska, of the
Atoms Fam, remembers catching Saul in NYC in
the mid nineties, "He's the only person I've ever
seen get a standing ovation." Indeed, on this
album Mr. Williams crafts one of the tightest lyrical
pieces assembled to date. Without a doubt
this LP is bold in scope, containing hiphop, soul,
jungle and even rock and roll song elements all
in one cohesive program. Definitely a wild ride
and a must have in your collection. Vibrant energy
and brilliant vocal performance. Easily one of
the top five albums of this year.
Best song: Wine (the new wine is dying on the
vine/ how much must you age before you're ageless?)
Worst song: La La La (really a disappointing
opening track, but the remainder of the album is
bananas).

The setting of this spectacular occasion is the
Cecil County Drag Strip in Maryland, just 25
minutes south of Newark, Delaware. The event,
the National Hot Road Association's (NHRA)
segment of a national tour that sponsors everything
from souped up muscle cars to jet propelled
funny cars to guys blowing themselves
up just for the hell of it, and oh yeah, for the
money. I periodically head down to the strip with
the guys for Friday's amateur night (eight bucks
for spectators, 10 for racers - everyone signs a
waiver), but we found ourselves crashing a big-
Next up were the muscle cars. This is pure
Cecil County, folks, nothing but Mustangs,
Novas, Camaros and every other major
American muscle car you can imagine dating
back to the late 60s. The thing is, these cars
must run mostly stock, with all their original
components and minor modifications. And it's
not necessarily about who has the fasted car,
in bracket racing, it's about which car has the
most consistent racing performance. What the
racers try to do is predict how fast their car will
run, whether it be a 9 second Dodge Neon or
16.5 second Olds Cutlass. The winner is whoever
can match or come closest to their dial-in
time. But the burnouts alone are enough to
keep you coming back for more.
The grand finale of the evening was presented
by none other than Benny the Bomb, who
was previously featured on the Tonight Show
for blowing up a Johnny-on-the-Spot, with
him still inside. This time, it was a 1987
Pontiac Bonneville, and Benny was wrapped
in nothing more than a stars-an-stripes pattern
fire suit and a tarp. I was able to gain the
rare opportunity to interview the vibrating
Benny, immediately after running out of film
photographing the explosion, but I was grant-
“To Sarh Best Wishes Benny the Bomb”
Jet-propelled funny cars
Hey, Where’s Benny?
A typical rail
So just remember, if your looking for some good,
clean, southern fun in this here fine U S of A,
make sure to check the Cecil County Drag Strip
or local events sponsored by the NHRA. Screw
the movies and the bar this weekend, get your
cousin with the supercharged 350 Chevy to sign
the waiver and race that mofo as you and your
buddies chug down Miller High Life and dip some
Copenhagen, cheering the boy on. After all, submerging
yourself in the subculture is half the fun.
See ya at the track!
Are you attracted to bright, shiny objects? Do
you find yourself intrigued by ridiculously fast
moving vehicles, the possibility of mass explosions
and by people risking their lives purely for
the sake of entertainment? Are you thinking
that's there's just nothing left to do in this county?
If so, search no further because a world
filled with wild hot-rods, jet propelled funny cars,
life threatening entertainment, and a 1987
Pontiac Bonneville is just around the corner. Oh
yeah, and there's also more hot southern belles
strutting around in cut off shorts than your girlfriend
could stand! Just don't forget you
earplugs, folks, 'cause it's a loud party.
Words & Photos by Sarah Tweddle
We arrived around 9 p.m., adrenaline
pumped and alcohol fueled, prepared to be
thrilled for the next two hours. First up were
the top-fueled (supercharged nitro-methane
or alcohol fueled) rails, vehicles approximately
30 feet in length and shoulder width,
accompanied by giant racing tires called
slicks, a wing to provide down force and a
parachute which deploys immediately after
completing the quarter mile in order to slow the
speeding rail. These awesome vehicles reach
speeds of near 300mph and can travel the
quarter mile in under 5.5 seconds.
Then we saw the jet funny cars, basically a
fiberglass shell wrapped around a jet engine.
After gaining entry to the pit to snap some
shots, I returned to the stands, sweating, with
a huge grin on my face. I was only about 15
feet from their fire-breathing tails, which was
absolutely amazing, yet deafening. Even my
boys in the stands couldn’t hear the next day.
Witnessing these funny cars fire up their jet
engines that can produce up to 20 feet of
flames and make the ground shake like the
Batmobile on speed is just plain awesome.
The best time we saw, a record for the track,
was 5.40 seconds @ 291.82mph. All I can
say to that is YEE-HAW!
Since this was a special ordeal, no amateurs
were permitted on the track, to our dismay. Of
course, there was plenty of amateur play in the
parking lot, but nothing obnoxious enough to
outdo what was on the track. We will be back on
one of these Fridays for amateur night, and
expect to see you there. Hey, you can even run
your own car, tricked-out or not, to see how fast
the baby can go. All you have to do is sign your
life away at the entrance (a waiver stating that
the track facilitators are not responsible for your
death or dismemberment) and get in line to race.
Just don't embarrass yourself.
they're each other's idols.
69 Camaro doin’ a burnout
Ahh, the track...
ger party than expected. It was fifteen
bucks to get in for this special event, but
well worth it.
ed a few words with the entertainer. He was
slightly shaken after the detonation, hence
the vibrating, but having survived the fiery
death trap, he was still up for autographs.
Apparently, he performs over 20 self-inflicted
dynamite powered explosions a year internationally,
including events in Aruba and Puerto
Rico. He said he lost count over five years
ago, but by then, he had already survived
over 1,000 death-defying acts. He also happens
to be boys with David Copperfield -

TWILIGHT REMEMBRANCES
I have never seen the shores of France so peaceful. Yes, there
are tourists now, but they all want to be here. Not like before; not
like us. The waves of the English Channel lap gently against the
shore as they always have. The anger, hatred and fear of our time
are gone. Or at least thinly disguised. Forgotten. What happened
on these shores is only remembered by those of us who survived.
Oh so few of us.
"It is time to go, Mr. Lubinski."
Karl, my nurse/driver, has come to take me back to the hotel,
but I have not yet had my fill of this evil place.
"A few more moments, Karl. Please?" I can hear the pleading
in my voice. It shames me.
Karl checks the brakes on my wheelchair and retreats up the
beach a respectful distance. He will never understand. I do not
understand and I lived through it.
I see a piece of driftwood near me. I cannot reach it. I do not
try. Was it once part of the Ardennes as so much of the wood here
was or just a stray piece of flotsam and jetsam, the history I attribute
to it.
I feel the tears well up in me as I stare at that damned piece of
wood. Now is no longer now. Now is . . .
"Mama, Why must we leave?' I am packing my valise, preparing
for a trip in the middle of the night.
I want to take my toy soldiers. Mama says we can only take
clothes. I fold, kiss and place my Sabot Yarmulke on top and wait
for Mama's inspection.
"Because it is our turn to go. We will ride the train far from
here. We will go to a place we are welcome."
Mama is scared but tries not to show me. She bends down and
makes sure my armband is secure then kisses me on the forehead.
She closes my suitcase and locks it. She picks me up and sets me
on the bed with my valise.
She says "You rest a while, My Sweet, we will leave soon."
She goes to her room to finish packing. Soon I hear her carrying
her bag to the front door. I cannot rest. I am too excited about
leaving.
I hear a knock at the door and slide down off the bed. I hold on
to the bed to steady myself. My leg braces keep me upright and I
try to drag my valise off the bed but it is too heavy.
Mama comes into the room and picks up my valise. She clucks
at me for trying to help. She takes my hand and slowly we walk to
the front door. The knocking becomes more insistent.
I hear as we approach the bottom of the stairs. "Fraulein, you
will open the door now."
Mama motions me to stay where I am and rushes to open the
door. She reaches the door as something slams hard into it, echoing
hollowly in the entranceway.
Mama opens the door to reveal a soldier ready to slam his
shoulder against it. He stands aside to let an officer enter our
home.
"It is time to go, Fraulein. You will go now." He says in broken
Polish. The words sound foul in his mouth.
I stay where Mama tells me, on the stairs, my braces and the
banister keep me upright. I want only to run and hide from these
men, these monsters. Even the children of Poland have learned to
hate the Germans. Especially Jewish children.
Mama tells them I cannot walk and the Officer motions to one
of his men. He walks to the stairs and he easily takes me in his
arms. He smiles at me, an attempt to reassure me. I hate him.
He carries me easily through the door and into the empty
streets.
(short WWII fiction)
BY: GREG SCHAUER
We begin to walk toward the train station. Mama struggles
with our bags, no help from the soldiers. As we approach, we see
other groups of people and soldiers. All are struggling under the
weight of their possessions. The soldiers greet each other as they
meet and then fall silent. When he catches my eye, the soldier carrying
me smiles. I only want to cry trapped in his arms.
Soon we are in line to board the only train in the station.
Different soldiers take our bags from us. The soldier carrying me
smiles one last time and sets me down next to Mama. I am glad to
be out of his arms and away from him.
Mama holds my hands as I lean against her. When the line
moves I would stand on her feet and step with her. The line moves
slowly. Mama chats with the other women. The few men traveling
with us are sick or crippled.
Soon we are on the train. The cars are rough cattle cars. They
still smell of cows and men. Men like I have only smelled in old
outhouses and chamber pots.
We ride on the train for many days. The rumor is we are being
taken to the town of Lusene on the coast of France. No one had
ever heard of such a town but we believe their lies.
The cattle car is uncomfortable. We sit huddled together on
beds of straw. Every few hours the train stops to take on fuel and
water. Sometimes the train jolts unexpectedly as new cars are
added.
Once a day, bread is thrown into us. Never enough, never
enough. Mama scrambles for our share, usually just a crust, day
old or moldy. Mama tries to hide it, but she gives me the larger
pieces to me. Even with her kindness I have never been so hungry.
I know Mama is hungrier still.
Water, we have even less. The soldiers pass jars through the
slats in the car. More often than not, they shove the jars through
and let them drop. Each time a jar breaks we get less water the
next time. We have no water at all for the last few days of our
journey.
Some of the elders die on the train. At first, we mourn, then as
the bodies pile up at the end of the car, we no longer have anything
left in us to grieve. We have no Rabbi or place to bury them. No
honors for the dead do they leave us, only their memory and cold
bodies.
When the train finally stops, we sit in the cattle car for another
full day, forgotten. Outside we hear movement. When we look we
see only soldiers.
Finally the doors open. The soldiers yell "Roust!", expecting us
to move immediately. They reach inside and roughly pull the closest
out of the car.
Mama helps me to rise; my legs are stiff from sitting too long.
I cannot stand and Mama looks tired. When we are outside, the
soldiers take a few of the stronger women and keep them to one
side. We stand there waiting not knowing where to go.
Again the soldiers shout "Roust" and point down the street. We
walk slowly, as fast as we can. There is no help from the soldiers.
Two soldiers follow us talking in German, strolling casually as we
struggle.
At the edge of town the others from the train wait under guard.
We wait as the rest of the train is unloaded. I curl up next to
Mama and sleep.
******************************************************
The sun is beginning to set over the ocean. The clouds are turning
red as the sand once was. Such a waste, but others had it worse.
At least we had a chance, slim as it was. At least we had a chance.
******************************************************
>>>>> please turn page for continuation of story >>>>>

When the train is unloaded, they form us into lines to walk.
Those of us who cannot walk are put into wagons. We sit practically
on top of each other. Only those with physical problems, like
my accursed legs, are allowed to ride. Anyone weak from lack of
food must walk.
I can see Mama from the cart but she cannot come near. She is
weak but carries herself proudly. Mama has eaten little for days
and now she must walk for none of us know how long. I fear for
her.
We travel for three days. Any who fall or refuse to go further
are shot. As I ride I see the corpses of many people strewn about
the countryside. Their bodies are left to rot; no burial, no remembrance.
I later heard them called death marches, and so they are. I
see much death on that road.
We are fed with scraps of old moldy bread. Not much but we
are now accustom to hunger. Those walking are given the most. I
have only one small crust a day and barely more than a cup of
water. Those who finish that march will ever be heroes to me.
At the end of our march we come to a wood and razor wire barricade.
Soldiers march its perimeter ever vigilant. Two men are
stationed on either side of the road as it passes through the barricade.
They open the wall like a door as we approach. The soldiers
marching the fence aim their rifles into the enclosure.
The cart stops outside and we are ordered off. Four passengers
die on the trip. They are left on the cart with us until now. Mama
comes to collect me. She flinches as she picks me up. I sit
between two of the dead, a man and a woman, and I smell of
death.
Mama carries me into the compound with the others. In the
distance I see a group of people coming toward us slowly. The
guards close the gate behind us. We are in our new "home".
Our welcoming party, all women and young children, meet us
as we mill around inside the fence. The soldier's guns are still
trained on us. We are told we must move away from the barricade.
They have a village, of sorts, set up on the beach. I can see the
water in the distance when I look.
We walk a few hundred yards down the beach. Mama carries
me still, refusing help from anyone. Mama's eyes are dead, gone
is the smile I am used to seeing. She is tired and weak from
hunger and still she will not trust me to anyone else.
A village has formed on the shore made of driftwood and tattered
clothing. Young children run between the hovels and leantos,
playing tag. People are camped up and down the shore as far
as I can see.
One of the women, Mada, asks if we have any extra clothing to
make shelters. She suggests giving up petticoats, slips, and jackets.
Modesty is no longer a concern. She tells us she has been
here two weeks and the Germans seem to let them survive on their
own.
She warns us the few men here are criminals. They have been
set to find food. No one trusts them but they are useful for heavy
labor.
The Men catch rats and other small animals. The Germans
bring moldy bread and cheese and rotten vegetables once a day.
Somehow we have been allowed a single large cooking pot. This
is our one luxury. As far as we can tell, the Germans have abandoned
us here to die.
Every day more of us arrive, mostly Jews. We are all undesirables
as far as the Germans are concerned.
I feel useless. I am put to work separating the good food from
the bad. Sometimes, I stir the cooking pot. Necessary as it is, it is
woman's work and I feel useless.
When I say something to Mama, she just clucks her tongue and
tells me to be happy. We are safe to enjoy life as we can. Mama
smiles more now. She feels useful, as I do not. She helps with the
cooking and the continual mending.
We each have only the clothes on our backs, so mending is
important. I have no idea where the thread comes from but it is
enough to keep us clothed.
We stay on the beach for several weeks. Then trucks arrive in
the compound loaded with wood and ropes. The Germans "enlist"
the men to unload the trucks. We now have many thousand people
living on the beach. Food is in short supply. Tempers flare. The
men sometime prowl the campsites taking women. The women
never return.
Soon the wood is unloaded. The Germans tell us "You will
build rafts. No more food. You go to England." Those of us near
the barricade protest. The soldiers raise their rifles and say, "Build
rafts or die."
The Germans came into the compound after the wood was
delivered and killed anyone building shelters or burning the raft
wood.
That night a council is held. Small villages have formed around
our traditional tribes and other groups along the shore. Now the
leaders meet, Jew and non-Jew, to form a plan. Food has run out.
We boil sea water to drink. Most of the people are sick or old.
The only men are not Jews and have little reason to help.
After hours of argument, the council decides we must build
rafts and trust our luck to the North Sea. We will go in waves. As
each raft is finished it is sent out. The raft builders will be the last
to go. This meets protests from the men but in the end they see the
wisdom in getting us all away safely.
Our exodus begins two days later. Mama and I are in the second
wave of rafts. Each raft takes four hours to build. They consist
of three logs lain as a base with logs lashed on top to form a
platform. We use our lean-tos as shelter from the sun. We have no
real way to steer, save the currents and branches used as paddles.
We are all hungry now. We put as many people that would
safely fit on each raft. More wood arrives daily.
The voyage across is cold and wet. We are all weak from
hunger. Two people paddle the raft at a time. Most of the people
on our raft cannot help.
>>>>> continued next page >>>>>
Greg Schauer
Between Books
Specializing in Science Fiction,
Fantasy, Horror, Comics
2703 Philadelphia Pike
Claymont, DE 19703
Phone:(302) 798-3378
Fax: (302) 798-3078
E-mail: gschauer@postoffice.dca.net

Twilight Remembrances (cont. from previous page) >>>>>
Our raft is lucky. No one dies at sea. Three passengers are elderly,
three are younger than I am, one is deathly sick, another
woman, Mama and myself. Most sleep fitfully unable to do anything
else.
Overhead we see planes, both German and British. We all fear
they will try to sink us. The weather holds for the voyage. We
know any storm will sink us. I spent most of the voyage lashed to
the raft. The currents carry us swiftly across the channel; still the
voyage takes more than a day.
I wake in time to see the cliffs of Dover rising from the morning
haze. Mama is still paddling, as she was when we began. She
looks worn, exhausted. She smiles a tired smile when she sees I
am awake. Her hands are blistered and her back is bent. My heart
breaks to see her that way. Yet in her exhaustion she propels the
raft ashore.
The beach below the cliffs is empty. Mama and the other
woman, try as I might I cannot remember her name, beach us on
the sand. The waves still rock the raft, but we can disembark.
One of the elders unlashes me and Mama carries me to shore.
She is so tired. I can see death in her eyes. Mama lays me down
on the dry sand. She falls asleep. Her body curled around mine.
She never wakes.
A few hours later, British soldiers find us. They share their
canteens and rations with us. They cannot wake Mama. I try to
wake her when I see them coming. After all attempts have failed I
give her up to the God. I kiss her one last time on the forehead. I
do not know the prayers. I am too young. I cannot do honor to
my mother. I hate the Germans more than ever now. They have
taken everything from me- my Mother, my Father, my home,
everything but my life. I would trade that for their lives now.
The soldiers are very nice. They take me from Mama's arms
and coaxed me to eat and drink. They do not speak Polish and I
am not interested in anything. My life is finished at nine. Finally,
I do eat and drink and they take me from the shadow of the Cliffs
of Dover.
I am sent to a foster home. My new parents are very nice.
England accepts more than half a million refugees in the next six
months. The battle of Britain is almost lost to starvation. Most of
the refugees are helpless mouths to feed, like me. Many people
emigrate to America. Food is shipped from America and refugees
are evacuated on the return trip.
America enters the war almost too late.
I stay with my foster parents until after the war. They are very
kind, but they are not my parents, they do not share my heritage or
language. Very few share my experiences.
I emigrate to the United States. I find other refugees. They
become my true family. We have lost everything and still survive.
In comparison, what Hitler did to us is the least of his atrocities.
His plans for a Jew free Europe nearly succeeded. It has taken
fifty-five years for me to return here. To come back to the last
stretch of Europe I saw as a child.
"It is time to go, Mr. Lubinski." Karl says at my ear.
The sun has almost set. Far in the distance I can see the Cliffs
of Dover highlighted in the light of the setting sun. England was
never my home, yet it still holds memories, good and ill.
The beach is almost empty now. Karl unlocks the brake on my
chair. So many people lived here for so long. Gone are the barricades
and the bodies. Gone are the crude tents and the woodpiles.
In their place are happy people playing in the sun. They have forgotten
what happened here and that might be for the best. The
holocaust may never be forgotten but maybe this part of it should
be. We survived, we were given a chance. Others including my
Father were not so lucky.
We survived.

Hey, this is Cognitive and
The Wheel. It’s an open-forum
writing and art center. You
may, and are encouraged to,
submit something. Please
understand that I receive a
great amount of poetry, so I
must be somewhat selective in
terms of that, but I do try to
consider everything I get.
Enjoy!
by: Damion Armentrout
"The Sexless Beast"
IN VICTUS
We facilitated his
own glorious martyrdom.
He gained mainstream
attention, and created
himself as a symbol to
all those who follow in
his cause. We are his
blind pawns, seeking a
justice that will only
increase the rancor he
wished to manifest. With
his "judicious" death
we rejoice, but there are
teams of rebels, ready
with the tools of revolt
and hate, waiting to
stream forth from the
hollows and hideouts,
all at the beck and call
of their glorious martyr
who, in death, fills their
hearts with inspiration
to wage their terrorist
guerrilla war on the status
quo in America. We should
not rejoice, but weep, for
we have added breath to a
monster waiting to breathe,
to metabolize hate, and smash
us all, in his name's sake.
McVeigh.
I am he
the sexless beast
tame and proud
singing solo
crafting thoughts
smearing colors
I wait
my blood untainted
sobriety intact
couples converge
groups re-unite
I am welcomed
humble and safe
open conversation
laughs and tears
I listen
thinking alone
waiting for her
the sexless beast
MONTY ( www.SpacePoet.com )
Don't Say Lozenge, Say "Loquacious" (dirty sausage)
There are people in this world who say
that man, despite all his Einsteins and Edisons and
Alfred Lord Tennysons, can never hope to surmount
the inescapably basic flaws in his character; flaws such as greed,
ignorance, and hatred; that he may as well not even try to rise above
his proximity to the apes in the long line of evolution,
but to those folks I say,
Mmmmm,...the bold, crisp taste of a LoquaciousG Brand Honey-Dew Lemon-Drop*
takes me right back to the youth of my innocence...
There are other people in this world who say
that the elegance and the grandeur of the Old World has lost its meaning to the age,
that life was...richer then, more honest and good n the days of sepiatone,
where stray dogs romped behind butcheries with eight truant children;
and to those people I say,
Mmmmm,...the brash, loud flavor of a LoquaciousG Brand Honey-Dew Lemon-Drop
brings me to a place I saw once in a dream; somewhere dark, and misty;
I remember there were some midgets there...
Still other people in this world believe
that you reap what you sow and that fate plays no part,
that we will always live with war and war's innocent victims;
there are people who believe that Canadians deserve everything they get;
that one day maybe we'll come to understand why horrifying things
like famine, Rosie O'Donnell and third-degree burns
happen to good people, but to them I say,
Mmmmm,...the brazen, slutty tang of a LoquaciousG Brand Honey-Dew Lemon-Drop
carries me away to a time when I was all alone, and naked.
I stand here alone, one man, and I ask you:
who among us can resist the torturous, righteous sweet kiss
& luscious, juicy,...um,...juice exploding all over you;
literally bursting forth, erupting from the seams,
a champagne fizz cascading across your face,
uncontrollably thrust forth in a wickedly excruciating spasm of pleasure
in each and every LoquaciousG Brand Honey-Dew Lemon-Drop?
This is a lot better than the milk splashing off a raspberry!!
There are some people in this world who will tell you, if you ask,
that to get back to where we once belonged, and to heal this world,
we need tenderness again, faith again, and a renewed sense of real compassion;
innocent babies, there are people who believe that children are our future,
and that we must be unafraid to hug old men with hygiene problems,
and to them I say,
Mmmmm,...the saucy, impudent twang of a LoquaciousG Brand Honey-Dew Lemon-Drop
roughly inserts me into a whole world of shuddering, incomprehensibly
sensuous European delights...
There's got to be someone out there who can tell me
if there's anything quite so exquisite as a lover's face,
so,...wan by the open window, in the glow of the morning's
rising summer sun; to the man who can find it in his heart to put it into words,
this precious tableau in the heart of my mind's eye, to him, I say,
Mmmmm,...the cheeky, defiant zest of a LoquaciousG Brand Honey-Dew Lemon-Drop
leads me into some dark supply closet in some perverted Satanic lesbian hospital,
locked in there tight with no room to breathe, surrounded by
greased up albino bitches in heat....
I'm sorry, where was I?
Oh, yes....
So when you're ready to leave the plain old world of good taste behind
for a wild time in sweeter pastures, just open your damned mouth,
but don't say lozenge, say "Loquacious".
*( G means it's made by God!)
Copyright © 6/14-15/99 by Rich Boucher.

The Hatch by: Dan Buck
As Alfred picked the tree droppings from his
shoes, he thought of the insanity killing him.
Though helping, the pills weren’t doing his body
any good. The only muscle that grew was his left
eyelid. And that tic ticked him.
...fluid dust, bloody ash...
For a while, he halted taking his medicine. He
just couldn’t swallow, swallowing them, any
longer. Of course, his mind cracked and fell into
illusion. After cops captured him and threw the
key away to the doctors, he lied. The real lie was
his brain making everything made up.
...coffin choking, grave spit...
It was evident he couldn’t stop. He couldn’t
quit wanting his brain back. Tears of sweat rained
on his shirt. It was fine. His mind was the one
with the bad breath. Getting a head was getting
him down.
...dark markings, plotting along...
He needed an alternative to the tablets.
Something worse to make him better. Living in this
same environment was cracking his skull’s soil. He
needed to get away from it all. And, if it slayed
him, at least, he was still alive.
...one more nightmare is sighted...
He walked and stepped through the want ads,
searching for a job at the hatchery. It seemed
fishy, but he was too chicken to try anything but.
Revivalist
Bearded roadside man, corduroy pants
and knapsack; rest your gitano feet
awhile to talk about how you’ve seen
the stars as company, you’ve watched
the world repeat their daily
drone as you walk your day away to
a tomorrow resting in the hands of
another, where you are headed is
something for your sentiment to
decide while you sleep in pseudo-comfort
among the beggars and gutter fairies rejoicing in
their wayward glory, your goal an
enigmatic crusade to the paupers and urchins
who’ve grown accustomed to their stagnant
lifestyle. You’ll fight your battles and win
your war one day, return to ground traipsed upon
by little feet with fine, yielding steps and
the tears you’ll shed won’t be ones of anguish.
-Sarah Aileen
Mary Todd
Guardians of darkness
Bury me in my white dress
I want to marry death
Stand by with the mainline
Right now my laudanum is fine
The aftermath of loosing my mind
He's the only one who loves me
And he lies bleeding into the night
Crying for the last casualty
As he lies bleeding into the night
In a sac in the river
Unwanted babies stir
Passing through my heart
I live with these strands of sorrow
Eating away at marrow
Blacken all my tomorrows
Because I fell through ice some time ago
And I can still feel myself sinking
These people their feelings
They melt with the snow
And I can still feel myself sinking
-Joseph Clipper
Artwork complimenting “Mary Todd”
by Mark Rosenblatt

Rudy’s Page!
It’s unanimous! The Official Uncle Jesse
of tric fanzine is Uncle Jesse Duke!
John Stamos can eat dirt! Denver Rules!
The Real Uncle Jesse
The “Half Dale Earnhardt Jokes” Responses:
Well, the general consensus is that any joke about any
person dying is plain wrong, but jokes about NASCAR are,
in fact, very funny if told well. No one attempted to finish
the half-jokes, and whether folks thought the column itself
was funny, that was an even split down the middle...
Hey...Waddaya gonna
do witcha 300 bucks?
Because of Bush’s $1.35 trillion tax
relief in which to boost internal spending
and help out the little people, everyone
that payed taxes this year can expect something
back. By the end of September, single
people will receive up to $300 in the mail,
married couples get $600, and many have
already received it. Let’s see what the
public is gonna do with their $300...
Rudy’s Mom and Dad: “We're going to use it as extra spending cash during our vacation in England!”
Mike S. (friend/auto mechanic): “Buy a few cases of beer, a sack of weed, and some pizza, and have a party! Hell, yeah!”
Rich (waiter): “It’s going towards my taxes that I already owe for this year.”
Frank L. (fellow ‘zine maker): “I’m going to use it to print up my anti-Republican political manifesto.”
Hank P. (friend/accountant): “I’m gettin’ the stripper for Mike’s party!”
Fred (of Canada): “I’d buy concert tickets to Tool, and some Aphex Twin CDs, but I don’t think I’ll see much.”
Larry B. (Del Tech student): “I’m gonna go buy my girlfriend a gold necklace with my name real big on it.”
Ted T. (multi-millionaire): “I think I should get more back, since I pay more taxes than you people.”
Marcy M. (my neighbor): “I’m gonna use it to pay for my DUI classes.”
Just Ask
Rudy!
Dear Rudy,
I am a 38-year-old man, and
I’ve got a little problem- well,
secret rather. You see, I’m a
happily married man, but over
the past year or so, I’ve
acquired this addiction, and it’s
starting to get pretty serious. I
have become a slave to kereoke. Every day of the
week, I know which bar hosts that glorious microphone,
and I know which songs will be available that night. If I
go to the beach, I know exactly where to go; God Bless
the Internet! Sometimes, I have to hop from bar to bar to
catch happy hour kereoke, then move on to late night
kereoke. Sometimes, I even show up at special events,
like when they set up in the community college cafeteria.
My wife thinks I’m a freak (I can’t hide a thing from her),
and I often need to come up with some excuse when I
encounter my co-workers or acquaintances who are out
for drinks. What do you think I should do? I don’t want to
stop, but I’m starting to fear for my sanity.
Truly,
Bruce Hammerball
Bruce,
Your’s is surely a tough nut to crack. Your problem may
lie in the fact that you weren’t invited to a friend’s wedding,
or you simply didn’t have friends to invite you to a
wedding. Perhaps you’ve always been a closet Celine
Dion fan, never quite being able to come to grips from
when the guys at work were making fun of her aging
husband. Maybe your high-school prom date backed out
at the last minute? What I think you need is a strong
support group. Next time you’re at the bar, ask the DJ
for any information for some help they might offer; I’m
sure your health insurance will cover it. Find the DJ that
impersonates Weird Al Yankovic, he is a true God-send.
The kereoke life is a long and hard road- full of torment,
failure, and eventually breakdown. Be strong, Bruce.
-Rudy!
Mike Dikk (Get The Strap zine): “I'm going to go visit my girl in Virginia and buy a tent so I can live in her backyard. I'm
not a stalker or anything. I just want to be closer to her. So it's romantic, not some crazy psycho stalker shit. I should probably
buy some food for the tent, and maybe some sort of a light. I really don't know much about camping, not even when it's in
someone’s backyard.”
Casey (tric zine, editor): “I’m donating my $26 to a good cause, like Miss Cleo or one of those late-night TV evangelists.”

SON OF RIGGINS. The Last Man, part 2 “Portrait of a Searching Poet”
Written by Thomas D. Prettyman, Edited and Published by Lowen G. Howard (the final installment)
The great Riggins encouraged Albatross to become a leathered and hard chain smoker like himself…which he promptly
did. He taught him that a shot of Jameson Whiskey every night and every morning (before bed and at the onset of waking
up) would keep him alive for many moons…alive, alert, and burly chested. His father also taught him the art of the ancient
sai and nunchauka. He learned to hunt buffalo, deer, and other horse like animals…he hunted like the greatest of Sioux warriors.
He was able to turn the flesh into steak and the fur into clothing. He shot vultures and sea gulls from the sky and
broiled them. With the feathers, he made great tribal head wear. When Albatross and the Great Charles found that the boy
had long ago screwed the soil of the farm through the use of "miracle grow" and other unnatural corporate idiocy…they
decided to start anew. He built himself a small hut in the middle of a great piece of forest…the "private property" signs were
inconsequential. He plowed himself a great field, shielded by a thick circle of oak trees. He captured a flock of wild turkey
and raised them for eggs and poultry. He grew a thick, black and vigorous beard. He was RIGGINS.
He could now live off the land and begin an adventure of his own. Where he might pass on once again, the legacy that
is RIGGINS. He would journey from Colorado to Puerto Rico…from Puerto Rico to Antarctica…from Antarctica to
Pakistan…and from Pakistan to some nation of the Orient…and so on and so forth. Along his journey he would take an
Eskimo female for himself, acquire a Wilder Beast as a loyal and courageous pet (which he affectionately named "Charles"),
and fight in a major war…solo, for his dislike of both parties involved. Many other adventures and obstacles would befall
young Riggins (he even crossed the path of ol' grandpa Charles Riggins more then once, the man seemed to never die…one
especially memorable instance involved the Amazon and a group of rapid alligators)…but he was hard. That's right, Albatross
Riggins found hardness and happiness. All of this with a shotgun strewn across his back and a song of justice upon his soul,
Albatross Riggins lived on.
This chapter in the legacy of the great family of Riggins has come to a close. This life long story of stories, however, is
far from over…
Well everyone, that’s it! That’s all I’ve got! Until Lowen sends me more writing, this is the last of “The last Man”. I’m happy to
say that I was able to accomplish my first task of running a short story over a course of five issues. If anyone is interested in
the possibility of me running your short story, please send submissions to tric@tonedeafrecords.com, or the address on the
first page. To read all of “The Last Man, Parts 1 and 2”, feel free to contact me for some back issues.
Hey Everybody! How am I doing?
This zine has definitely gone through
some changes, and I’d like to know what
you think. Last time I asked was about
a year ago, and I got some great insight,
so let’s try it again. Drop me an e-mail
or a card or letter, and maybe I’ll send
you some free stuff like stickers, CDs,
other people’s zines, etc.! Thanks!
tric@tonedeafrecords.com
Casey Grabowski
219 East Court
Wilmington, DE 19810
Don’t make us have to beat you
up like we did in 5th grade!
Buy a friggin’ ad, man! Dirt Cheap!
⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥⌥
Confused? That’s OK! Just order some free back issues, and we’ll get you in the loop!
(Please see the title page at the front of the zine for further contact information; donations or stamps are welcome)
Issue 11: Sean of the Toilet Boys reminisces his Delaware days while talking about his crazy life in New York City.
Issue 10: Philly’s Tapping the Vein signs with Nuclear Blast. The 2001 Republican National Convention comes to Philly.
Issue 9: Nick Rutundo sheds light on the mid-to-late 90’s Delaware punk scene via his band, Walleye.
Issue 8: Chicago’s Atombombpocketknife talks about coming to Delaware and other smaller cities to play gigs.
Issue 7: Marcus of Zen Guerrilla tells us what it takes to get out of this vortex we call Delaware.
Earlier issues are available in a package as a custom, hand-bound softback, made upon request, for $10, which includes
shipping plus other goodies.