Focus on Fodder - Australian Fodder Industry Association

A bloke got bogged down a muddy road
and paid a passing farmer fifty bucks to
pull him out with his tractor.
After the bloke was back on dry ground
he said to the farmer, “At those prices, I
should think you would be pulling people
out of the mud night and day.”
“Can’t.” replied the farmer. “At night I
cart water for the hole!”
A pom, fresh off the plane at Sydney
airport, is trying to negotiate Australian
customs. Finally, when it’s his turn to
get his passport stamped, the customs
officer starts rattling off the usual
questions:
CO: How long do you intend to stay?
POM: 1 week.
CO: What is the nature of this trip?
POM: Business.
CO: Do you have any past criminal
convictions?
POM: I didn’t think we still needed to!
page 24 AFIA AFIA Newsletter Newsletter Summer Winter Spring Winter 2011 2012
2011
Smoko Time
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A man’s car stalled on a country road.
When he got out to see what was wrong,
a cow came along and stopped beside
him. “Your trouble is probably in the
carburettor,” said the cow.
Startled, the man jumped back and ran
down the road until he met a farmer. He
told the farmer his story.
“Was it a large red cow with a brown spot
over the right eye?” asked the farmer.
“Yes, yes!” the man replied.
“Oh! I wouldn’t listen to Bessie,” said
the farmer, “she doesn’t know anything
about cars.”
A man and his wife were sitting in the
living room and he said to her, “Just
so you know, I never want to live in a
vegetative state, dependent on some
machine and fluids from a bottle. If that
ever happens, just pull the plug.”
His wife got up, unplugged the TV and
threw out all of his beer.
Two brothers were raised on a farm, and
one brother moved to town. Each year
the city brother would come out to visit
the farmer brother. Each time he came
out, the farmer brother was complaining
about his crops. It was too hot or too
cold, too wet or too dry, prices were low,
the crops looked bad.
As the city brother was driving out one
year, he noticed the crops looking great.
He had the radio on and crop prices were
hitting an all time high. As he got out to
the farm, here was the farmer brother
sitting on the verandah with a grumpy
look on his face.
The city brother asked, “Why are you in
such a bad mood? The crops look great,
there’s been plenty of rain, and prices
were setting record highs!”
The farmer brother replied, “You know
what a crop like this takes out of the
soil?”
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