Issue 1 of Now Then.

I’m going back to Palestine to
see my wife, Arwa, next week.
We got married in October last
year but the government won’t
let her have a visa to come
live with me. They say that she
can’t come here unless she
proves she can support herself
in Britain.
We met when I was volunteering
in Hebron for the International
Solidarity Movement.
I had been there for three
months and one day I was
helping her family with harvesting
the olives from their farms.
The Israeli army have built a
camp in the middle of the family’s
land, and so to get from
one uncle’s house to the
neighbouring one, you have
to go around the camp
and past the soldiers.
The area is surrounded
by Israeli settlers.
In 1984 the settlers made a
legal claim on the land and
put up housing on what is
meant to be Palestinian land.
My wife’s family is the Abu
Haikal family who own all the
property on top of a hill at the
centre of the land, her father’s
and her three brothers’ houses
are all next to each other.
Arwa’s father has a document
from Israel’s High Court, won by
the group Rabbis for Human
Rights which gives Palestinians
the right to pick olives. The document
also states that the army
and police are under obligation
to protect the olive pickers,
but that doesn’t happen.
The Solidarity Movement sends
people there to help, to be observers
and human shields. The
settlers come out and throw
stones at olive gatherers and
make life difficult for them.
Once they set the olive groves
on fire.
I was so impressed by Arwa’s
confidence, she was negotiating
with Israeli settlers and
soldiers on a daily basis, and
she was impressed that I, as
a man, let her get on with
it. Arwa and I fell in love and
she came over to the UK on a
tourist visa for three weeks the
following spring. I went back
to Palestine at the end of the
summer for our engagement.
You never know if the Israelis
will let you back in or not, it’s
completely arbitrary, they know
I’m a peace activist, and next
time they might decide not to
let me in because of that.
That’s why I want Arwa here.
Her family weren’t sure at first,
but once I became a Muslim,
they were happy. I converted to
Islam before we got married, as
she couldn’t marry a non-muslim.
I’m a Christian, and I don’t
see a contradiction between
the faiths. I pray five times a
day, every day, but I haven’t
renounced Christianity. We got
married six weeks after getting
engaged - it’s more for the
women, the wedding ceremony.
I had to dance with Arwa in
front of hundreds of women! We
caused a stir with the wedding
cars as we had to cross a border
to get to the mosque where
we were married. It was our car,
the family car, the Red Cross,
the Israeli police, international
observers following them. It was
the only time that year that Palestinians
were allowed to drive
across the border. It’s a ridiculous
situation, she’s employed
full-time in Palestine working
for a government office, but
how can she find a job here
when she has no idea of when
she might be able to start work
because her visa has not been
granted? We’ll sign anything
to say that she’ll never claim
benefits here.
I just want to be with my wife.
JOANNA SUTHERLAND
IN INTERVIEW WITH
DAVE HAVARD
ACCIDENTS
BY THEIR NATURE
MAY NOT BE PREDICTABLE, BUT
HUMAN NATURE IS. RATHER
THAN WORRY ABOUT THE DAN-
GERS OF THE ROAD, IT’S BET-
TER TO ExPECT ARROGANCE,
STUPIDITY AND IGNORANCE
FROM DRIVERS AND PEDESTRI-
ANS. WITH THAT IN MIND, HERE
IS A LIST OF SOME COMMON
DANGERS ON THE ROAD SO
THAT WE CAN MORE EASILY
AVOID THEM.
ONE - PEDESTRIANS
Most of this type of creature
are fitted with earphones
these days, and are obsessed
with noisy electronic boxes
which are stitched to the
hand and occasionally lifted
toward the side of the head
where the brain once was.
The pedestrian isn’t looking
for you, so they don’t see you.
The pedestrian listens only
for the car. Spit, cough, sound
your bell or whistle the latest
ring tone to alert them. Don’t
ruin your bike by purposefully
riding into them. Unless
you’ve got a really cheap
and heavy Chinese thing.
Then go for your life.
TWO - ALL SODDING MOTOR
VEHICLES
These are by far the greatest
enemy to the cyclist. The car
driver wants to kill you, the environment
and the entire universe,
and they won’t stop until
they’ve driven to the gym
again. My advice, when you
are cut up or threatened by
someone in an Earth Assassin
is the traditional two fingered
salute. Or if you fancy a bit
of catch me if you can, the
good old wankers hand. Or
if it’s very serious, get the key
out and watch them shudder.
Stupid ignorant bastards.
THREE - TAxIS
Taxis have their own category
due to the fact they have more
practice at trying to kill you.
They are the Devil, and the meters
running brother. Taxi drivers
hate cyclists. Be very calm, or
very very violent. Nothing else
will do.
FOUR - BIkE LANES
Designed to aid you. Though
you’ll find needles, broken
glass, kebabs, students and all
sorts of crap on these little red
strips. Get on the road in front
of the cars. Why should you ride
on these red washing lines? We
were here first. Bastards.
FIVE - CHILDREN AND DOGS
The only real difference here is
one never stops shitting all over
the place. Both will run towards
the front wheel the moment
they see a bike. Be on your
guard. I carry a lead pump for
these blighters.
Yours in cycling,
and nothing else,
MD Hudson
PALESTINE.
PAGE THIRTEEN.
AN UNREPORTED TRUTH.
CYCLING TIPS.
WITH VICTORIAN GENT ABOUT TOWN, M.D. HUDSON ESQ..
PAGE FOURTEEN.