[whacks] & facts WHACK Marijuana brings all the girls to my yard! FACT The girls might come to your yard but they’ll run the other way once they figure out that marijuana can make you sexually impotent. Translation: Smoke too many spliffs and you won’t be able to get stiff. ‘Nuff said. WHACK Without a doobie to relax, I’d be like Napoleon Dynamite … but less cool. FACT Lots of people – not just high schoolers – use pot to relax and feel comfortable around others. But there are other ways to ease social situations! Google the net: ‘Tips for overcoming social anxiety’ and find something that works for you. WHACK I can’t stop because all my friends smoke. FACT If you do want to cut back or stop smoking, try to tell at least one of your friends so that they can support your choice. Feel free to blame us: tell your buddies you read something in a pamphlet that made you change your mind! Try using the following excuses: “Just say that you have already had far too much tonight.” or “No way man, it makes my teeth yellow!” Say: “No thanks, I’m already weird enough,” or “No thanks, I like my brain the way it is.” WHACK Smoking pot is the only way to open my third eye and expand my mind. FACT Unless you are a for real, Salassie-propping, dreadlocked Rastafarian, marijuana will not grant you spiritual transcendence. With each toke you are actually burning holes in your brain and increasing your chances of developing a mental illness. That’s right – 75% of young folks who smoke pot regularly are at risk of experiencing a psychotic episode. So before you smoke up, ask yourself if it’s worth the risk of potentially hearing voices and seeing demons. And that’s no joke. WHACK At least I’m not a crackhead! You can’t get addicted to pot. FACT Addiction can be a mental or physical dependence: just because you don’t get the shakes like a heroin junkie doesn’t mean you’re not addicted to pot. If you feel like you need it to get by or enjoy life, you are addicted. Also, the more you smoke – in frequency and amount – the more pot you’ll need to ingest in order to get the same high. WHACK At least I’m not getting drunk every weekend! Green is better than booze. FACT And jumping off a cliff is better than drowning? Both drinking and smoking in excess can mess you up and the risks are much worse for younger folks. Though we may feel invincible, our brains will continue to develop even into our late 20s. You don’t want to take a one-way trip to loony land and get stuck there for the rest of your life. WHACK Mary J is a natural, harm-free high. FACT We’ve heard it all: “But it’s a plant!” “It’s all natural!” “My grandma uses it for arthritis!” If you offered a toke to your Auntie (who’d never tell you that she was a groupie in the ‘60s) she’d be flying out to Mars. The pot on the market right now is a zillion times stronger than it was in the ‘60s or even the ’90s. Not only do growers right now use hybridized seeds but many dealers also cut their stuff to add weight (meaning mixing in cocaine with the pot, for example). So that pile of “au naturel” bud is in fact a heap of chemically saturated power pot.