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GCSE_Lit_Poetry_Anthology_FINAL_FOR_WEB

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Postcard from a Travel Snob<br />

I do not wish that anyone were here.<br />

This place is not a holiday resort<br />

with karaoke nights and pints of beer<br />

for drunken tourist types – perish the thought.<br />

5 This is a peaceful place, untouched by man –<br />

not like your seaside-town-consumer-hell.<br />

I’m sleeping in a local farmer’s van –<br />

it’s great. There’s not a guest house or hotel<br />

within a hundred miles. Nobody speaks<br />

10 English (apart from me, and rest assured,<br />

I’m not your sun-and-sangria-two-weekssmall-minded-package-philistine-abroad).<br />

When you’re as multi-cultural as me,<br />

your friends become wine connoisseurs, not drunks.<br />

15 I’m not a British tourist in the sea;<br />

I am an anthropologist in trunks.<br />

Sophie Hannah<br />

54

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