September 2000: "The Hillary Legacy" - Cistercian Preparatory School

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He upgraded other sports that traditionallyran a distant second to football.In 1987, he establishedCistercian’s first ever varsity baseballteam and coached it for severalyears. Then he handed over theseduties to his assistant coaches togive them a chance to shine (and toearn a little extra income). His loyaltyto the school — from its boysto its principles — lifted everyone.IS MYguardian angelput here to enrich“TOMmy life and makemy life better,”Sheila Hillarywas telling Fr. Peter when Coachpassed away from adult acutemyeloid leukemia (AML) onMonday, April 10. He had beendiagnosed just over two weeks earlier,as spring break began. Now, onthe first day back from break, wordwas spreading around the schoolthat Fr. Peter had left campus.Everyone seemed to understandwhat that meant.“It was strange, so sudden, sounexpected,” said Wyatt Maxwell. “Isuppose we dealt with it pretty badly.Apparently the little guys — his PEclass — were hit very hard, and Iwould bet the rising seniors were too.I can’t imagine knowing you’re notgoing to be coached by CoachHillary. It was the ultimate in reachingthe top, being a senior underCoach. It’s what seventh gradersdream about.”“We were already thinking aboutcoming back the next year and shootingthe bull with Coach after practicewhen the team runs, the traditionalthing that the graduated class does. Wewouldn’t get to do that. We were sad,we had classes, but nothing wasaccomplished. We learned that the bestway to deal with it was to talk abouthim, all the stories.”Coach would never have expectedthe scene at the CistercianGymnasium on April 13, 2000. Over1,200 crowded into the gym to paytheir respects to a man who neverappeared particularly impressed withhis own value.For this, the largest Mass ever atCistercian, the community ofCistercian Fathers concelebrated theservice, with Fr. Abbot the main celebrant.“The gym beautifully transformedinto a sanctuary,” Fr. Bernardrecalled. A six-foot-tall crucifix washung in place of the image of theHawk. The altar was set on a raisedplatform directly in front of the cru-A Cistercian parent’sperspective on thelegacy of Tom HillaryBy Bill DawsonThese remarks were delivered at Coach Hillary’s funeral.Tom Hillary was God’s gift to Cistercian parents. Ofcourse, our boys thought he was their special gift, andtheirs only. They looked up to him with respect and awe.But they probably never realized that we as parents lookedup to him with that same awe and respect. As parents wefelt that way for two basic reasons.First, Coach Hillary got more out of our boys than anyof us ever thought possible. An example of that was winningfootball. Although his record is impressive, the championshipbanners on the walls, here, do not even begin totell the story.Coach Hillary gave us exciting teams and incrediblegames. My favorite was the 1988 Greenhill game atCistercian. Trailing with merely seconds left in the game,Drew Whaley caught a pass from Cistercian’s freshmanquarterback. It was not unusual for Coach Hillary’s teamsto have freshmen playing key roles. A block from JohnMichael Stewart sprung Drew loose, and he scored thewinning touchdown with no time left on the clock. To thisday, that is the most exciting game I have ever seen.I have heard from some of you who attended theGreenhill game at Cistercian this year that it was equallyexciting. John Dayton described it as the best football gamehe had ever seen — not just the best high school footballgame, the best football game. Those types of victories andfourth quarter heroics were not unusual occurrences. Theywere common. We came to believe that, despite incredibleobstacles, we were always in the game.I am glad Coach Phillips (from Houston Episcopal) ishere with us today to reminisce about the 1994 Episcopalgame at Cistercian. Mike Stewart tells me it is his personalfavorite. When the Episcopal players took the field, theywere so big we parents were afraid for our sons and merelywanted them off the field unhurt. We groused amongourselves why our kids would even be playing a team sobig and burly. The boys, however, did not share ourdoubts. We won that game, and not in typical Cistercianfashion with long passes and the trick plays Coach Hillarywas known for. We lined up and ran right over them.Bubba Futerfas gained more than 300 yards. TheEpiscopal team could not believe it. We could not believeit.That game illustrates what was remarkable aboutCoach Hillary. He won with the talent we parents gavehim. He never complained about our kids being tooscrawny or awkward or nonathletic.I recall my son going out for football as a freshman. Ifully expected Coach Hillary to call me and say “Hey, I’veseen more meat than this on a deer’s antler.” But he nevercomplained. He took our kids on as his special challenge.And boy did he love a challenge. I asked one of the boysone year what kind of team we would have. He thoughtabout it a minute, and then said “Well, we are small, butwe make up for it by being slow.”That is not to say we parents didn’t provide materialto work with. One year, I think it was the one when theteam claimed their average SAT score was 1300, I askedone of the players what the team would be like. He saidhe could not promise much except that they would notforget the plays.Father Peter, you said you had received an e-mail froma former student saying he did not play sports underCoach Hillary because he was “not really an athlete.” Factis, most of the boys who played for Cistercian were “not10 The CONTINUUM
Photo courtesy of Gail ReinemundGUARDIAN ANGEL Tom and Sheila Hillary at thecoaches’ party last fall.cifix. Pictures of Coach Hillary weredisplayed, including one beside thelectern. “It was absolutely fitting thathe should be commemorated‘in hishouse,’” Fr. Bernardcommented.Players, parents,faculty, old teammates,fellowcoaches, family, andfriends came to celebratethe stories ofleadership, love,caring, humility,inspiration, andsportsmanship.They remained forhours at the reception.They wantedto share storiesabout this man whohad impacted somany, yet never acknowledged hisown significance.In August of 1985, each Hawk wassitting glumly in the locker roompreparing to take the field for a scrimmageagainst a much stronger 3-ACoppell team. When a football playercontemplates his manhood inmoments like these, nothing elseseems to matter. Coach Hillary understoodthe depth of the doubts this day.He broke the silence with a tale fromhis playing days. This was a rare occasion.He recalled sitting in the lockerroom before a night game at theCotton Bowl his senior year. TheMustangs were preparing to face thenumber-one ranked team in thenation, Roger Staubach’s Navysquad. Across the country, fans andjournalists snickered, “SM Who?”Coach Hillary recalled how the playersdidn’t care what anyone elsethought, they felt they could win theballgame. They believed in themreallyathletes,” at least not until they met Coach Hillary.Of course, we were not without skilled athletes. One,John Michael Stewart, made All-American at CoachHillary’s alma mater, SMU. And, of course, there wereothers. I see Jeff Lockhart and Matthew Nevitt in theaudience. They were certainly fine athletes. If CoachHillary had but two or three talented players, particularlyat skill positions, he produced exciting football teamsand unbelievable wins. Bigger, faster teams would fallvictim to Cistercian. He did that with the bulk of theteam being an unlikely bunch of football heroes.How did he do it? The answer is he got more out of ourboys than any of us could have ever expected by giving tothem more than anyone else ever could. That is the otherreason we, as parents, loved and respected him so.When we had our kids, no one gave us instructionbooklets. Intuitively, however, we knew that all kids sufferfrom feelings of insecurity, and we were careful to tell ourchildren just how special they were. But our kids weresmart. They knew their parents were not objective. Welacked credibility.Coach Hillary was different. He was objective. He didnot just tell our boys they were special, he convinced themof it. He instilled in them confidence and a can-do optimism.He taught them to be courageous and showed themhow to be. He ingrained in them a never give up attitude.In the fourth quarter, when things were tough and theother team was bigger, faster, intimidating, trash talking,and bullying, our kids dug in. They never quit and theyalways believed they could do it. Even now when they aretired and overworked, overwhelmed by deadlines andchallenges they are not sure they can meet, the trainingCoach Hillary gave our sons holds them in good stead.Coach Hillary started day one instilling confidence inour kids. How many of you out there were “puppies” onCoach Hillary’s football team? That is the name given tofreshman who are just starting out. Raise your hands highSeptember 2000so that we can see them.Now how many of you former puppies recall having tomemorize a poem, a poem Coach Hillary selected? Raiseyour hands. (The poem appears on page 7.)Coach Hillary taught our kids much more. For example,he taught them the subtle yet important distinctionbetween pride and arrogance. He taught them the differencein being humble and being timid or tentative. He washumble, but no one ever accused Coach Hillary of beingtimid or tentative. He taught our boys respect and discipline.They both looked and acted the part. How many ofyou recall his rule for road trips — “school attire or better.”[Hands raised]. Our boys never talked back toumpires or referees. Now, I know of one boy who did, butmy wife won’t let me mention his name. I can tell you itnever happened again.Coach Hillary taught our boys not to gloat in victory orsulk in defeat. They were winners every time they cameoff the field. He taught our sons to be joyful in victory andto take defeat with dignity and to learn from it withoutgiving in to it.Coach Hillary was the antidote for evil and destructiveinfluences our kids were bombarded with every day— on TV, from professional sports, from other studentsand other parents, and maybe even sometimes from usas parents.Coach Hillary taught our boys that sports were gamesto be played for fun. He loved pitching batting practice.How many of you have ever stood in the batter’s box andattempted to hit one of Coach Hillary’s curve balls?[Hands raised]. Now tell the truth, how many of you everhit one of those curve balls? [No hands raised],Coach Hillary is here with us. He lives through hisboys. His boys just happen to be our sons. And for that, asparents, we will be eternally grateful.Bill Dawson is the father of Will ’90, Drew ’95, and Jeff ’97.11
Page 3 and 4: K. Pomorski and K. Dietrich: Deriva
Page 5 and 6: Dallas Christian, Trinity Valley wi
Page 7 and 8: It’s all in the state of mindThe
Page 13 and 14: selves and although Navy was bigger
Page 15 and 16: Photo courtesy of Douglas FejerHILL

September 2000: "The Hillary Legacy" - Cistercian Preparatory School

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