The Rattler February 10, 2010 v. 97 #7 - St. Mary's University

The Rattler 11What doBy Alonzo MendozaStaff WriterWhat are women looking for in arelationship? Countless shelves of romanticcomedies explore the answerto this perplexing question, yet menacross the world still do not have thefull answer. From awkward first encountersto just complete miscommunication,men are notorious for simplynot understanding the minds ofwomen.Dr. Kurt Choate, who teaches a psychologyclass about gender roles andrelationships, says, “Boys and girls aremore alike than they are different.”That statement should put maleminds at ease, but still, “men andwomen have different viewpoints onwhat is necessary in a relationship,”says Choate, who attributes this differencenot to biological makeup but todifference in upbringing.“Many men struggle more thanwomen want?women to show affection because of According to junior English major,how they were raised,” says Choate. Crystal Mares, it is not only important“Women are socially taught to show that the other person is able to understandher flaws, but it is also importantmore affection than men are.”Sometimes all it takes to better understandthe female mind is a little they are taking in their life.”that this person “knows what directionacceptance.Marquez has similar feelings.Junior psychology and philosophy “I want to be with a person whomajor, Ana Marquez, would like her is intellectually stimulating and challengesme to become a better person,”partner “to understand [her] backgroundand feelings” and simply accepther for who she is.With contrasting similarities andsaid Marquez.According to Marquez, all it takes is differences between men and women,“someone who will give me the time how does one find common ground?and effort to show that I am worth beingwith.”vidual’s needs depend on their tem-According to Choate, “Every indi-Junior psychology major, Ariana perament, but the most important partPerez agrees.is communication.”“I would like someone to be silly So for those guys struggling withwith and [someone] that I do not mind getting that special girl, a simple Facebookchat won’t do. Pick up the phone,being myself around. I am looking fora guy who makes me comfortable with say hi in the café, tell her you appreciatewho I am, what I am about, and the her and her beauty and communicate.things I like,” Perez said.lentine’s Day giftsHow to drop hints to your crushMake a mix CD with songs thatthey will love. Don’t put songsin just because they are aboutlove — doing so will only makeit a dated CD that your loveywill tire of. Decorate the caseyourself and write a romanticline or two.A coupon book with personalizedmessages can end up beingthe gift your sweetheartuses the most. Make couponslike “dinner on me” or “helpwith homework” that can beredeemed any time.Drive to a small town like Grueneor Fredericksburg andstroll through the park or visitfamily owned shops. Treat yourhoney to ice cream or a smalltrinket to remember the day.Single them out in a crowd. Whether at aparty or during a busy time in the Café,don’t hesitate to approach them and showsome interest.Make lots of eye contact.Compliment the little things. Show themthat you notice the not-so-obvious thingsand impress them with your special attentionto detail.Don’t show off. Nothing is more cheesyand unattractive than someone who thinksthey are “all that and a bag of chips.” Begenuine so the other person can find youmore relatable.“Let’s get physical!” The famous words ofOlivia Newton John could be helpful forhopeless fools in love. A subtle touch onthe shoulder or back can do the job. Don’tget too creepy though!