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Robert David Real-life stories of sibling separation This is Robert and David’s Story, they can now reflect on their experience. London-born brothers, Robert and David, were first placed into the care system in the late 1970s when they were just three years and eighteen months old respectively. At the time, both their parents were struggling with drug-related issues. Initially the boys were both fostered with the same family. Their foster parents, Mike and Faith, provided what David remembers as a ‘very loving house’ in the remote rural location of Painswick in Gloucestershire. It was to become his childhood home. However, this was never meant to be a long-term fostering arrangement and it was simply not practical for the family to foster both the boys going forward, so social services arranged for Robert to be moved to a new set of foster parents, Evan and Anne. Even today, for Robert the pain of this move and the separation from his brother clearly smarts and he finds it hard to understand why it happened. “I’ve always questioned why I was chosen to go but all I’ve ever got is different stories,” he says. “ I feel my life between the age of six until about 14 is a kind of no man’s land ” Luckily his new foster parents, who had two sons several years older than Robert, also provided what he describes as a ‘loving environment’. ‘They welcomed me into the house and showed me a lot of love. The elder boys and I did a lot of things together and always made me feel part of the family,” he says. During the separate fostering, the boys did occasionally meet, but these meetings were rarely successful and the brothers often ended up fighting. Robert thinks it was the isolation David went through that made the difference. “It was tough for him.” Robert says. “I always felt he was alone and bullied.” David remembers Robert as “the six or seven year old in the playground who protected me.” For David, life took a dramatic turn when aged just six he came out of the care system and went to live with his mother who was now separated from Robert and David’s father. This was not a happy experience for David who spent the next few years running away from home and flitting in and out of the care system. He remembers this time as an experience of ‘abuse’ and was regularly in trouble at school for fighting. When living with his mother and her new partner, David was a witness to domestic violence. When he intervened, his mother turned on him rather than her partner. “I thought I had saved her, but she saw it otherwise, so I ran away and called Childline.” He was placed back in care in adolescent units in Victoria Park, Southwark. “Mike and Faith found out I was there and came to find me so I saw out my teenage years with them.” “I was 19 when Robert and I started to get closer again’” David says. It was the sudden and tragic death of their mother that began to bring them together. David remembers the pain of the day vividly. “It 24 November 1997 when I got a phone call telling me Mum had died and it was Robert who had discovered her dead in her own home. I know the shock of this really affected him.” “It was shortly after this that Robert had got a flat and we started going to music concerts together and meeting friends. It was a fractured relationship, but we did get back together. My brother is a very generous character, but we are polar different. I feel my life between the age of six until about 14 is a kind of ‘no man’s land’ so now I look at Mike and Faith and think that’s what family should be,” he says.
A word about our volunteers Siblings Together’s activities rely on support from committed volunteers. We are always on the lookout for new enthusiastic volunteers to become a part of the team. Our volunteering cadre includes social workers, youth workers, students, musicians, poets, artists, and performers, all working together to deliver well-balanced and creative initiatives. We have a wide range of volunteering opportunities that suit a range of skills and availability. All volunteers are required to undertake child protection and other training, and to have an enhanced Disclosure and Barring Service (DBS) check done. We also require that they adhere Quilts We have grown a network of quilters who enjoy making quilts for the children and send them into the office in the months approaching each camp. Every single child at camp leaves with a quilt which becomes part of the memory of being at camp with their siblings. to the policies for staff and volunteers laid out in our handbook. These are designed to ensure a safe and enjoyable experience for all.
Page 1 and 2: A report into the impact of sibling
Page 3 and 4: Some facts and figures about siblin
Page 5 and 6: Q Do you think that having a sister
Page 7: Real-life stories of sibling separa

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