Viva Lewes Issue 117 June 2016

COLUMN
East of Earwig
Mark Bridge has mallets aforethought
Photo by Mark Bridge
Tradition is a strange thing. Sometimes it leaves
us with events that seem ill-suited to the modern
age, such as torch-wielding Zulu warriors marching
through the streets of Lewes. And sometimes
it makes us wonder why circumstances ever
changed. The Busy Bee garage in Ringmer falls
into the latter category: a place where you can
fill up with petrol, get your car fixed and even
buy a new one. It seems strange that anybody
would want to disconnect those three activities
into separate sites, particularly when there’s
the opportunity of picking up a packet of fruit
pastilles at the same time. Yet this type of all-inone
establishment is almost an anachronism in a
world where vehicles are now sold in megastores,
petrol comes from a supermarket and you’re
not allowed to open the bonnet of your own car
without signing a disclaimer.
Opposite the garage is the Cheyney Field, home
to another tradition. It’s where Cheyney Croquet
Club plays a game that can trace its roots back
around 400 years. I really can’t see why a malletbased
pastime isn’t more popular. It sounds
like the kind of sport that should be an integral
part of every macho stag weekend, alongside
quad-bike racing in Estonia and an impromptu
session of British Bulldog at the airport. Anyway,
if you’re interested in learning more, there’s an
open day at the club on Sunday 5th June, which
just happens to be National Croquet Day.
These two venues on the B2192 have been on
my mind recently because I’ve sailed past them
on the number 28 bus. I’m a big fan of public
transport, even though it seems a little incongruous
when double-deckers squeeze through the
bottleneck outside Tom Paine’s house. One of the
reasons for my fondness is the cost: a £3.40 return
from Ringmer to Lewes is less than a couple
of hours’ parking on the High Street. It’s more
relaxing than the precision-timing required when
trying not to exceed the limits of free supermarket
parking. And I can claim a complimentary
newspaper as part of my bus trip. You may be
surprised how long you can sit in Caffè Nero
if your empty coffee cup is hidden behind the
Metro showbiz section.
But my main reason for not driving into Lewes
is self-preservation. Tradition has gifted the
town with attractive narrow streets of terraced
cottages. Here in Ringmer, we’re blessed with
new-fangled architectural features, including
driveways for almost every house and roads that
are wide enough for two vans to pass without
snapping off their door mirrors like a pair of
rutting stags. What Ringmerite would choose to
venture into a place where every car bumper is as
scuffed as a child’s football boot? Not without a
warning sign on their vehicle, anyway. I’d recommend
something along the lines of ‘Watch out - I
play croquet’.
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