FOCUS Magazine May June 2017

British Etiquette
e UK is an amazing country. I love it so much so that I married
a Scotsman and settled down in a small city outside London. Now
it feels like home, but it was daunting at first. Many expats will
agree that moving to a new country can be very intimidating. I am
from Los Angeles and though I speak the same language, there are
many cultural subtleties that I did not understand at first. I experienced
a steep learning curve that resulted in some hilarious encounters,
but also some consequences.
Every culture has rules of social engagement. e British however
place even more importance than most on etiquette. Knowing the
protocol here can mean the difference between acing or failing an
interview, making lifelong friends or meeting special someone. “It
is just good manners” is a popular phrase here, which is often uttered
in derision about a person that has broken etiquette.
As an expat who is now here to stay, I have compiled some advice
to make the most of living here and to help you not make the same
mistakes that I did! I would also recommend reading a copy of
Debrett’s Handbook for more in-depth information. is book explains
protocol, although some of the information is inapplicable
to most (how to act when one meets the Queen for example), it
nicely explains the finer points of British social etiquette.
What to wear
British fashion is, and always has been, conservatively chic.
Classic cuts reign supreme, particularly in the workplace. Even
in casual get-togethers, a polished look is important. In London,
I showed up to work on ‘casual’ Friday in a t-shirt and torn
jeans. My mentor looked at me and said: “It is always better to
be mistaken for the queen than the pauper.” I cringed and made
sure my casual Los Angeles clothes were relegated to the weekend.
Always be well-groomed even if you are the most dressed
up in the room.
Greetings and conversation
Over-familiarity is very frowned upon here in both conversation
and physicality. A firm handshake when meeting someone is the
ideal greeting. Kisses or hugs are reserved only for close friends.
A typical hello is “How are you?” in which you reply, “Fine, and
yourself?” Anything more said on your part will be very awkward.
I used to explain my entire weekend before I realised
that the person had no interest and was looking vaguely uncomfortable.
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