2016 Summer Kansas Child

CHEYENNE
SHERMAN
WALLACE
GREELEY
HAMILTON
STANTON
MORTON
LOGAN
WICHITA
KEARNY
GRANT
STEVENS
RAWLINS
THOMAS
SCOTT
FINNEY
HASKELL
SEWARD
DECATUR
SHERIDAN
GOVE
LANE
GRAY
MEADE
NESS
NORTON
GRAHAM
TREGO
HODGEMAN
CLARK
FORD
PHILLIPS
ROOKS
ELLIS
RUSH
PAWNEE
EDWARDS
KIOWA
COMANCHE
SMITH
OSBORNE
RUSSELL
BARTON
STAFFORD
PRATT
BARBER
JEWELL
MITCHELL
LINCOLN
ELLSWORTH
RICE
RENO
KINGMAN
HARPER
REPUBLIC
CLOUD
OTTAWA
SALINE
MCPHERSON
HARVEY
SEDGWICK
SUMNER
WASHINGTON
CLAY
DICKINSON
MARION
BUTLER
COWLEY
MARSHALL
POTTAWATOMIE
RILEY
GEARY
MORRIS
CHASE
WABAUNSEE
ELK
NEMAHA
LYON
GREENWOOD
JACKSON
BROWN
SHAWNEE
COFFEY
WOODSON
DONIPHAN
ATCHISON
JEFFERSON
DOUGLAS
FRANKLIN
ANDERSON
ALLEN
LABETTE
CHAUTAUQUA
MONTGOMERY
JOHNSON
MIAMI
LINN
BOURBON
CHEROKEE
REGION ONE
opportunity to teach
WILSON NEOSHO CRAWFORD
Empower the Witnesses
In bullying situations, however, the real
power lies with the witnesses. A bully can’t
be a bully without witness approval. Most
witnesses have no idea of the power they
have — they think the bully is running
the show, and they have little or no ability
to stop it. OUR MOST IMPORTANT
JOB, THEN, IS TO EMPOWER THE
WITNESSES!
Research tells us that the critical use
of witness power occurs within the first
10 seconds of the bullying. The bully
is watching for the reactions of those
nearby — to see if they will join in, laugh
in approval or look fearful and downtrodden.
The bullier is also keenly aware
of non-approval, and if that is shown, well,
the bully’s days are numbered. Witnesses
must learn this and use their power in
ways that are comfortable. Some can talk
to the bully, while others may only feel able
to speak privately to the target. Any choice
is a good choice, as long as it is a show of
non-support for the bullier.
Witnesses can:
•§
Talk to a trusted friend or adult
•§
Ask the target to play or go give them
a hug
•§
Support the target privately by saying,
“I am sorry that happened.”
•§
Respond publicly to the target. “This
isn’t right. We don’t treat people like
this at ABC Preschool.”
•§
Speak calmly to the bullier by saying,
“That’s bullying. Stop it.”
•§
Talk to the bully and ask them if he/
she is OK — is he/she sad or mad
about something? Give the bully a
hug. Only a very brave witness can
try to befriend and help a bullier.
Teaching Targets and Witnesses
How to Speak Up
Whatever lines we want the targets and
witnesses to speak, we must help them
to know HOW to speak them. They
must always use a strong, calm voice
— screaming back and calling the bully
names only makes them become what they
dislike — they become the new bully. So,
“Knowing what’s right doesn’t mean
much unless you do what’s right.”
we must coach children how to use their
strong inside voices, their information
voices, so that their words and vocal tone
show that they are in charge. Targets and
witnesses must show that the bully is not
strong enough to create any feelings within
them — such as sadness, anger or fear.
Children’s voices and body language must
show that they are not annoyed or upset
by the bullier — they are simply speaking
the truth and showing their power. They
are showing who is really in charge of the
situation, and it is NOT the bullier.
Promoting the Positive
— Theodore Roosevelt
Becky Bailey also teaches, “what you
focus on, you get more of.” So, focus
on the positives in your classroom
— celebrate the kindnesses shown
when a child helps someone or gives a
compliment. Make a kindness bulletin
board where children can do “put-ups.”
Talk about being bucket-fillers of each
others’ buckets. Read books like Words
are not for Hurting by Elizabeth Verdick or
One by Kathryn Otoshi. One beautifully
and simply demonstrates witness power.
Children have to watch us use empathy
with others, find solutions rather than
blame, and practice listening and
negotiation skills. Show the children how to
support a bully-free world. Be an example
of how to build others up instead of tearing
them down, and how to look at the world
with our hearts instead of just our eyes. n
Vicki Price, B.A., M.S., has been the Director of
Education at CAPS (Child Advocacy and Parenting
Services) in Salina, KS since 1992. She was an
elementary school teacher and a school board
member. At CAPS, she presents “Happy Bear”
(a sexual abuse prevention play) and Bullying
Prevention programs in area schools as well
as teaches parenting classes. She also writes
parenting articles for the Salina Journal. She and
her husband, Scott, have 3 children, 2 sons-in-law
and two grandchildren.
Ensuring Children Enter
School Ready to Learn
Child Care Aware ® of Kansas-
Region One has worked with several
communities to assist with discussions
on how to support child care providers
and meet the needs of working
families. Child Care Aware ® is able to
provide materials that support learning,
attend meetings to be a voice for young
children and the early education field,
and participate in phone calls to share
information and data.
Recently, the complex topic of
child care supply and demand was
discussed at a community meeting
in Salina. From this facilitated,
collaborative conversation, an Early
Childhood Study Committee was
formed. The committee, established
by Bill Hall, superintendent of schools
for USD 305, Salina, consists of early
childhood partners, chamber of
commerce members, United Way staff
and school personnel.
The committee will continue to
facilitate valuable conversations in an
effort to ensure all children in Salina
enter school ready to learn. They have
developed three focus areas with
regard to child care:
•§
That there is high-quality care
provided for children.
•§
That there are enough child care
slots for working families.
•§
That child care is affordable for all
working families.
We are excited about this creative,
collaborative discussion group and
will continue to support this work,
and similar work taking place in
communities throughout Region One.
After all, our mission is to ensure that
high-quality early education is available
to all Kansas families and children.
Contact us today if you need
information or resources by calling
855-750-3343.
www.ks.childcareaware.org Kansas Child 9