SCOTLAND'S TOP INDEPENDENT FASHION ... - Xile Clothing

Adam Le Chic -Our resident expert on beats, bleeps and
disco breaks takes us to the dark heart of the White Isle
As a lover of house and dance
music from the tender age of 10
and a DJ for the last 14 years
you’d think it would have been
standard protocol for me to have
shipped my ass to the party isle
that is Ibiza a good few times.
Unbelievably this July was my first
visit and I returned with a selection
of Balearic battle scars and some
fucking good stories!
Unusually I wasn’t entirely looking
forward to this trip prior to lift off;
to be honest I felt pretty damn
nervous and worried that the
island would break me both
mentally and financially. The
blatant commercialism that has
over-ridden the island over the last
15 years was also a real concern!
In my humble opinion pop music
should not be available on Ibiza
and the likes of Ibiza Rocks, Radio
1, Guetta and his dickhead mates
the Swedish House Mafia should
be deported straight to Magaluf.
Upon arrival we went straight on
the scrounge and soon found an
ex-Xile staffer willing to hook us
up with ‘Guesties’ for the infamous
‘We Love...Sundays’ at notorious
superclub Space. Norwegian
disco-don Lindstrom’s terrace
set was off the hook and the
unbelievable eye-candy on offer
was simply mind blowing. This
proved to be a recurring theme;
nowhere else on earth have I seen
such a selection of beautiful ladies
– not even Easter Road on a Friday
night comes close!
Having left Space with brain cells
intact and black book decidedly
empty it was an early start the next
day for us. Unlike the rest of the
pasty punters that packed onto
our return flight, we managed to
drag ourself out of our post disco
slumbers and get down to
Bora-Bora beach every day for
a spot of tanning. As you lay
there getting your brown on you
can slowly hear all last night’s
party casualties emerging from
their apartments onto the beach.
Hearing stories such as ‘oh man, I
was f**king melted last night, what
happened?’ and ‘I woke up in the
middle of the night and he had
a latex sheep mask on and was
bending over me’ is bad enough
– worse still when you consider
it was my roommates telling the
tales! The stories from Ibiza 2011
are x-rated and I’m certainly not
about to spill the beans as my
mum will definitely read this.
A highlight was attending Zoo
Project in my leopard print
cardigan, to be honest I felt that
this was the only place on earth I
could pull it off. Imagine a derelict
Zoo converted into a 3 arena
rave pit, minus the animals. The
only wild creatures here were the
clubbers in attendance… spaced
out, foaming at the mouth and
looking decidedly feral. This was
a cool setup, picture yourself
dancing away with beautiful people
in zebra stripes and rubber masks
while Burnski blasts out a banging
mix. An old seal enclosure was
transformed into a stage where
onlookers stood and boogied
while the DJs and animal-esque
dancers did ‘their thang’. As the
evening was drawing to a close
our night was just beginning! We
headed to an alternative afterparty
at Jade Jagger’s villa which
which has been converted into an
underground nightclub called (you
guessed it) Underground – genius.
The real drama was getting from
the zoo to the villa. We were
approached by an illegal taxi
driver, normally you would be a
little apprehensive but we were
still buzzing from our experience in
the animal enclosure and thought
‘sure mate, you seem friendly so
I’m not scared of waking up with a
rubber fist hanging out my ass’...
Our mistake! We jumped into his
convertible Jeep, the techno was
chucked on and we fist pumped
and gurned our way across the
island. Three minutes into the
journey we saw a roadblock with
police cars flagging us to pull over.
Although the driver bricked it at
this point we were just keen to
get to the party. Two coppers pull
up to both the driver’s door and
me in the passenger side door
and the standard ‘license and
registration’ chat proceeded. The
driver was hauled out and I made
the mistake of asking ‘Is there a
problem officer?’ This didn’t go
down well, I was immediately
pulled from the Jeep, forcibly
spreadeagled across the front of a
police car and thoroughly frisked.
I hate to think how this looked as
my leopard print cardy flapped in
the wind while a muscular police
officer performed what can only
be described as a ‘reach around’
to see (or feel) if I was packing
any illegal substances. It goes
without saying that I wouldn’t be
involved in such a thing so we
were released back into the wild
and headed off to yet another party
– the driver is probably still being
probed as we speak.
My initial fear of the island proved
unjustified as Ibiza is truly a
beautiful place to visit…not just
for the party scene, the food, the
people, the sights are first rate. I’d
like to thank the white isle for the
best damn holiday I have ever had.
Clubbing Tees
58 59
Blood Brother Tee £35 (12066)
Diesel - Otavis Tee £50 (12117)
55DSL - Smile Tee £35 (12239)