Talk 15 September 2022

4 Advertising & Newsdesk: (046) 624-4356 Find us on Facebook 15 September 2022 TALK OF THE TOW N
Be mindful when you
offer to help someone
Assist when asked, it’s warranted, and ensuring the dignity of the person
Ta l kIT
ABOUT
Travelling on life’s interesting journey while
living with blindness, I encounter all kinds
of questions – not to mention strange
situations. At times I feel as if a book is long
overdue to assist friends, family and members of
the public when encountering persons with
disabilities.
However, that is a topic for another day.
The encounters I describe below happened in
real life and will start to answer the questions
many readers of this column have about helping
persons with disabilities in everyday situations.
It’s a spring day at OR Tambo International
airport and the waiting hall is buzzing with lively
conversation. Like so many other passengers, I am
on the long and winding road back home after a
work trip.
A ground hostess from the airline is tasked
with “meeting” and “assisting” me. After
announcing herself and asking if she may assist,
she well-meaningly puts her arm around me.
She does this because she is afraid to lose me,
or that I may fall.
Stifling a laugh, and with politeness cultivated
through many years of living with blindness, I
gently but firmly take her wrist and with the other
hand take her elbow and say: “Thank you. I’ll take
the elbow to be walking half a step behind you.”
Once she is assured that I am holding on
firmly and walking safely behind her, we end the
sisterly embrace and make our way through
security gates and finally onto the aircraft.
The next day I am back home, crossing the
road with my guide-dog (I think at that time it was
Va n i l l a ).
As we wait to cross the road, a well-meaning
person proceeds to guide us away from the
crossing, their arms around my shoulders, saying:
“Let me help you”.
All this while Vanilla and I had our route
CUP HANDOVER: Six local boxers from Port Alfred based
Masibambisane Boxing Club were part of the Sarah Baartman
squad that participated in the Eastern Cape championships held
in Queenstown recently. The Eastern Cape Amateur Boxing
Organisation (ECABO) officials are handing over the third-place
trophy. Picture: SUPPLIED
in aid of Sunshine Coast Hospice Cancer Drive
planned out and were on a well thought out trip to
the supermarket.
After rerouting and continuing on our way, we
are waiting at the next crossing, and a pesky traffic
light takes forever to change. I am listening
carefully to move safely and with the traffic.
A kindly lady next to me gently breezes in: “I
shall cross now, it is safe. Do you wish to cross
with me?”
Having waited for what seemed an eternity, I
take her up on her offer: I thank her and give the
“f o r wa r d ” command to my dog.
Acceptable time and place.
Looking back now, some situations I have
encountered are rather comical. However, on a
serious note, there is certainly an acceptable time,
place and method to offer help.
Please consider the points below when you
decide to help to someone with a disability.
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Help – it’s personal.
Help is a personal thing, whether disabled or
not, and should be managed.
Wait until you are asked for help, unless it is
clear from the situation that there is imminent
danger, or that the situation is out of control.
When you do help without being asked,
explain why.
In a more controlled day-to-day situation, at
the mall or restaurant, ask how you may assist.
Sometimes it may be something small – the
person is looking for something they dropped.
On another occasion, it may be a wheelchair
user needing an object at the top of shelving in the
supermarket.
While speaking to a blind person with a guidedog
or white cane, use a normal tone as you are
quite audible to them.
In some cases, for example, to someone living
with blindness or partial sight, information is key.
This may mean different things in social
situations, for example you may be asked for
information about a situation, who is in
attendance, or how seating arrangements work.
Another situation: someone spilt something on
a jacket. A tactful whisper and inconspicuous
assistance to remove the spill will be most
welcome.
Furthermore, never refer to a person with a
disability in their presence: “How much sugar
would she like in her coffee.”
Address the person by name to grab their
attention and include them in the conversation.
Never greet someone familiar with the person
with a disability and omit to greet them; it is rude
and says they don’t exist.
Finally, remember – help is only help when
asked for or when it is clear that the situation
warrants it and the dignity of the person receiving
help is assured.
Compiled FAITH QINGA
Facebook Question
What did you admire about
Britain’s Queen Elizabeth II?
To T T ’s online readers had very
positive views about Britain’s late
Queen Elizabeth II. M i ch e l e
Vincent said she admired the
Queen’s “long and faithful service
as Queen and her devotion to
d u t y.” Robin Collett said Queen
Elizabeth II was a “Special lady
chip of the old society; she spoke
well, acted like a lady, looked like
a lady, was courteous, kind and
always had a good word for
p e o p l e .”
Paul Gibson relayed his personal
encounter with the Queen. “I met
her twice. The first time in 1972 I
served her lunch at the Savoy
Hotel. When we were introduced
she said to me, ‘My, you are a tall
one!’ She was shorter than I
imagined her to be. The second
time was at a garden party at
Buckingham Palace in 1977. She
told me I had ‘pretty eyes’. She
was so personable and quite funny
at times. I will always remember
her words to me. A very special
l a dy !” he said. Colin Taylor said
he admired the Queen’s “l oya l t y
to duty”.Bev Peach Mclaggan
said: “Absolutely everything…
These wannabee celebrities pale
into insignificance beside
her”Gillian Armstrong said: “Her
dedication and what a lady and
true Queen she was”. Oscar
Conrad Bessenger said; “She had
Gutzpah and Uithouvermoee'”.
Bonny Skipper said: “She was
always gracious, and a lady to her
f i n g e r t i p s .”Jean McCowen said
she loved seeing Queen Elizabeth
II at a Windsor Horse show years
ago. “A wonderful monarch who
was so interested in her subjects'
lives. Her faith, caring and
devotion made her so special”,
she added. Angela Liesenberg said
she admired the Queen’s “l oya l t y
to duty, work ethic spanning her
entire life and that she was always
an absolute lady”. Babette
Vermaak said: “Her work ethic
and beautiful skin and of course
her own teeth.”Buzzing on Twitter
in Port Alfred this week:
University boat races are back
in Port Alfred@garthmanthe
tweeted “Anyone else use to go to
the Boatraces in Port Alfred?”
Student drowns at West Beach
last Saturday@ H e ra l d N M B
tweeted “A young woman
swimming with friends at the
beach in the Eastern Cape town of
Port Alfred has died after being
swept away by strong rip
c u r r e n t s .”
WARRICK STRACHAN
B.Compt (Hons) CFP ©
Independent & Professional since 1993
FINANCIAL ADVICE FOR SUCCESS
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