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I Still Love Her
Navneet Mehra
The Larry Czerwonka Company
Hilo, Hawaii

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places,
events and incidents are either the products of the author’s
imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to
actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely
coincidental
Copyright © 2012 Navneet Mehra
All rights reserved.
First Edition
Published by: The Larry Czerwonka Company
Printed in the United States of America
ISBN: 0615725945
ISBN-13: 978-0615725949

DEDICATION
Dedicated to my Dear Parents
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
It is not possible to write a book without the assistance of few
supporting hands.
I am thankful to Mr. Om Trivedi for his guidance during initial
stages of my writing career.
I would like to thank my brother Bunny Mehra for believing in
my writing skills and motivating me since I step into the writing
field.
Without valuable inputs from Larry Czerwonka and his team
this manuscript would not have taken the shape of book.
Important and top of all, a big thanks to my Parents and
Grandparents for their blessing and support in all ups and
down in our life, thus keeping my self-confidence always
boosted.
Finally big thanks to Microsoft team for providing me the best
software to write on.
Almighty God
Navneet Mehra

Everyone is looking for their soul-mate Take our Love Test
and find out: “Is She the One?”
Oh God, these things look so stupid. I saw the quiz in a
magazine. There’s a photo of a couple looking into each others'
eyes, and it’s decorated with drawings of cupids and love-hearts. I
mean, please. As if you can find out she’s ‘the One’ by answering
a few silly MCQs. Like, for example:
My girl and I girl go together like :
a) Heer and Ranjha
b) Romeo and Juliet
c) Tom and Jerry
d) None of the above
Honestly, how ridiculous! How can a pair be like Tom and
Jerry? I turned a page, and found an “Ask Doctor Uncle” page
with some questions from people suffering from this and
that…Errrr.. I can’t read that. So, maybe that dumb quiz isn’t so
bad. After all, it has got to be more fun than reading about who is
ill and what kind of illness he/she is having . Eeeks whatever!
Quickly I turn back to it. OK, here we go with another
MCQ...
1. Whenever you think about her, do you get butterflies?
a) Yes, always
b) Sometimes
c) Never
Well, I wouldn’t call them butterflies exactly. In fact, it’s been
so long the butterflies have probably grown up and flown away.
Now it’s more of an ache. Not like the terrible toothache, but
may be like an headache. I go plump for b) Sometimes.

Navneet Mehra
2. How long have you liked her?
a) Less than six months
b) A year
c) More than a year
My mind flicks back. We met in the winter of 2007. I was
nineteen. Which makes it .... my mind does the calculation, OK,
so it’s four years.
So what? Four years are nothing. My father has known my
mom for twenty eight years. Yes, but your mom’s married to him,
says a little voice inside me. Ignoring it, I quickly tick option c.
Fine, next question
3. Can you see yourself getting married to this girl?
a) 100%
b) 50%
c) Zero
Well, that one is easy. It is zero. In fact, I’d say the chances of
marrying her are less than zero. But that’s FINE. I’m perfectly
OK with it.
All right, so in the past I might have thought about it. And
maybe for a moment I would have imagined myself in brown
sherwani and her in a wedding saree, with some ornaments
looking like a perfect Indian Bride. Dancing our first dance under
the “Soni de Nakhre” on DJ. Leaving for our honeymoon to
some hill station.
Coming back, I notice I’ve been absentmindedly making a
heart around a) 100%. Oh…Shit. What did I do that for?
Frustrated, I grab my pen and start scribbling over it furiously. It
is not as if that means anything. I suddenly realize I was pressing
so hard that the page got torn.

I Still Love Her
4. Do your friends think you are obsessed with this girl?
Hmm… come on… I think about her from time to time, but
I would not say I am obsessed. Not at all. I mean, I am not
disturbing her with Facebook messages Or Googling her
relentlessly. OK, I confess, I Googled her thrice…. maybe five
times…
Oh, all right, so I have lost count over the four years. But so
what? Who has not gone home and Googled a girl they are in
love with?
Hang on!!! Did I just say the Love word?
I didn’t mean that at all! It is this silly quiz - its making me
think all kinds of things…. I tick b) No.
As the minute hand of the clock moved I continue through
the questions. They helped me pass the time. Just on the last
question ....
1. Which film best describes your relationship?
a) Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna
b) Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
c) Diljale
....when I suddenly hear the announcement - ‘The Next
Station is Rajiv Chowk, Doors will open on the Left’ - and I
realize I’m nearing my stop.
Stuffing the magazine into my bag, I started to make my way
through the packed crowd which had increased from Laxmi
Nagar. Of course, no one pays any attention. Since last few
months, I have been noticing that all my ‘Sorry-s’ and ‘Excuse
me-s’ fall on deaf ears.
It’s not that Delhites are rude. I am a Delhite by birth, but it’s
just that my way of apologizing for almost everything has zero
effect. They don’t understand what I am apologizing for. To be
honest, half the time I too don’t know what I am apologizing for.
It is something I do like a habit. Like logging on to Facebook and
checking out the inbox every five minutes.

Navneet Mehra
Exiting the metro station, I pause at the pedestrian crossing
to study the direction of the road on the big green board, which
tells me for Janpath I have to cross the road. Some people have a
sort of inbuilt GPS, a bit like pet dogs. You can drop them
anywhere and they will find their way home before you do. Not
me, I get lost whenever I go to any area after a gap of few
months.
I am stumped. Today, I neither had tea after work, nor I am
aware of the shop here. Looking up and down the street in
frustration, I gave up and asked myself “Who the hell told you to
come here?”
“Excuse me??”
I turned to see a fellow girl standing next to me, waiting to
cross. She looked at me quizzically. Oh my God, did I just say
that out loud?
‘Errrrr. .’ I was embarrassed. “Never cross a road while light
is red,” I said whatever came to my mind. She stared at me
“Sure,” she replied.
Feeling totally uncool, I look away and pray for the lights to
change quickly. “Oh, look, now we can cross,” I announced with
a relief, and shooting her with an awkward smile, I crossed the
road with the crowd.
Walking past some food outlets, I glance at the couple’s
cozying up together over a romantic meal. I move on quickly.
Once upon a time there was a princess of mine, but we didn’t
end up living happily ever after. Like I said I am fine with it. It
was a long time ago. I have moved on. In fact, since then I have
dated loads of different girls.
Well, perhaps not loads, but surely few. And some of them
were really nice. Like, my last girlfriend, Shreya. We met at a
party and dated for a couple of months, but it was never that
serious. I mean, she was good fun, and the enjoyment was not
bad. It’s just….
OK, I know this theory. Everyone dreams of finding their
soul-mate All over the world millions of people are looking for
their true love, that one special person with whom they will
spend the rest of their life. And I am no different.

I Still Love Her
Except it does not happen for everyone. Some people spend
their whole life looking and never find that person.
If, by some luck, you are fortunate enough to meet ’The
One’, do whatever you can but, don’t let them go. Because you
don’t get another chance at it. They are not like the buses and
cars, one goes and the other comes in minutes, that is why they
are called 'The One.'
I mean, if there were loads of them, they’d be called ‘the
Four’, or ‘the Ten’, or ‘the Forever’. So I think like that, maybe
that’s it for me. Because you see, I was lucky. I did find the One,
but then I lost her. I blew it, or she blew it. At the end of the day
it doesn’t really matter.
Besides, it is not like I am unhappy. There is a saying “Better
to be loved and lost than never to be loved at all.” To tell the
truth, I rarely think about it any more…
But yes, sometimes, when I least expect it, something will
remind me, of her, of us, randomly, anything. And sometimes I
keep wondering what my life would have been like if things had
worked out. What if we were still together? What if we had lived
happily ever after? What if that, what if then, what
if ...?
Sometimes I even try to imagine what it would be like to see
her again. Which is crazy as it"s been so long I doubt I would
even recognize her. I could probably walk past her in the street
and not even know it was her.
Oh, who am I kidding? I would recognize her in an instant.
Even in a crowd. And let me tell you something else!! Deep down
inside my heart, I know if I saw her again, I would still feel
exactly the same. Anyway, that"s hard, isn"t it? It"s been four
years since I last saw her. Who knows where she is or what she"s
doing ...?
Up ahead, a sign interrupts my thoughts. McDonald"s.
That"s it! Feeling a beat of relief, I start hurrying towards it.
Dismissing the thoughts from my mind, I push open the
door.

Navneet Mehra
Inside, it"s almost full with the after-work crowd. I pause at
the doorway. Sitting at the left corner is a man in a black suit.
He"s busy working at his BlackBerry.
That"s my elder brother, Raj. He"s older, by four years, but it
might as well be ten the way he bosses me, like I"m a child. He"s
used to doing that to the people very often. He has two assistants
working for him. He"s a Senior Associate at a firm that
specializes in Tax and Audits. Personally, I haven"t got a clue
what work Tax and Audits involves, but know it involves
calculations of a large amount of money.
But then my brother has always been the brainy one in the
family. He spent 3 years training to be an hotelier, then as soon as
he qualified, changed his mind and retrained as a Charted
Accountant…n gave those CA Prelims, Inter n Final n
whatever… Like it was no biggie.
Raj, the brainy one dabbles with large number and I am the
computer whiz..(at least, that"s what my parents like to tell me).
Maybe that was to make me feel confident, after I got passing
marks with difficulty in Math at one time. While 2D and 3D still
puzzle me but computers were always my only hobby and I
ended up at a BCA course.
I took three years of computer courses filled with some Math
and English too. I passed somehow, and completed graduation .
I had all these big dreams. I was going to have this amazing
career as a Computer Geek. I was going to have associates across
the country. I was going to have my own office in Gurgaon..…..
For starters, have you any clue how expensive offices in
Gurgaon are? No, neither did I… Well, let me tell you…..that
wouldn"t have been so bad if I"d been able to solve all computer
issues of some MNCs… I mean, at least then I could have saved
for an office in about… ten years, but still, it"s possible.

I Still Love Her
But the truth is, I never actually solved computer issues for
anyone. Well, OK, I did once, but that was for my father for five
hundred INR, and that was because he didn't know how to
format his system. As it turned out, it was also my last service. I
had to give up this service work and look for a proper job after
six months of sliding further into debt. Consequently, my dreams
of being an Independent Entrepreneur ended up just that. Still, it
was probably for the best. I was young and unrealistic. I probably
would never have made it anyway.
After that I temped for a while, but I was pretty terrible. I
finally got lucky and landed a job in a small computer firm in
Nehru Place. At first I worked just as a technician, but over the
years I clawed my way up from repairing the system to working
with new clients and providing the long term solutions to their
companies for Computer security. Then a few months ago I was
offered the chance to work as an Assistant to Mr. Roy, an
experienced personality in the field of Computer Security.
Of course I jumped at it. Who Expected it? If I"m entirely
truthful, that"s not the only reason I decided to pack up my stuff,
move out of my brother's flat and shift some kilometers. It was
partly to get over my latest break-up, partly to escape the
prospect of another terrible summer, but mostly to get my life
out of a bit of a rush.
Don"t get me wrong - I love my job, my friends, my life
here... It"s just ...Well, recently I"ve had this feeling as if there"s
something missing…..waiting for something to happen….The
only problem is, I"m not exactly sure what.
My brother"s still focused on his BlackBerry and hasn"t seen
me walking over to him yet. Since I arrived from Mumbai, I"ve
been staying with him and Rita, his wife. They have a twobedroom
DDA Flat in West Delhi area and it"s been great, but
challenging too.
As soon as I told him I was moving here, he sent me a list of
house rules. My bro is very organized like that. He draws up lists
and ticks things off, one by one, with special highlighter pens….

Navneet Mehra
We"re total opposites in everything really. He is healthy; I"m
a bit thin. He likes to save; I like to spend. He is punctual; I'd like
to be punctual, but can not. I don"t know why. I really try to be
punctual…. by setting off fifteen minutes early, setting my clocks
a few minutes forward, wearing two watches, setting up the
reminders - but I still seem to end up running late.
Like today….,.
Right on line I hear my phone beep to signal I"ve got a text. I
take it out of my pocket. I"m a bit scared of my big brother. I
click the little message icon on the screen.
“Five more minutes then you"re dead.”
That scared me a lot.
“You"re late.”
As I drop myself down next to him on the chair, he doesn"t
even look up from his BlackBerry. Instead he continues replying
to an email.
“I know, I"m sorry, you know - I"m useless with directions.”
“And timekeeping,” he reminds.
“So, what"s my punishment,” I asked, pulling a remorseful
expression.
He smiles, “Well, this isn"t that much of a big crime, but let"s
see ... You"d probably get away with a warning and a fine.”
“A fine?” I inquired. “How much?”
“Hmm ...” He, thought for a moment and said “Three
Chicken McGrills will do.”
“Hang on - three Chicken McGrills?”
“You, me and Rohan.” he explains.
“Oh, he"s here?” I say in surprise, looking around for him.
“He has gone to attend to a call.” Raj gestures to the back of
the door, where at that moment I see Rohan talking over the
phone.

I Still Love Her
“Hi…..!” he shouts from there itself. Anyone watching
Rohan greet me would think we were lifelong friends, but we met
only a week ago, when I answered his ad for a roommate to share
his apartment in Gurgaon. I will be moving in this weekend.
After a few weeks of my brother house rules - " Usage of
Television not permitted after 10 p.m." Apparently it don"t allow
him to sleep, as he likes to be in bed early and wake up early too.
I knew it was time to move out and get my own space.
“I didn"t think you could make it” I gasp.
“My last client canceled the meeting” he explains.
“OK, so what are we having?” I ask.
“I told you already dear,” says my brother without a
moment"s hesitation.
“Rohan?” I turned to him expectantly.
“I have no idea,” he said “Now let me think. … I will have
French Fries ...”
“And I"ll have Pepsi,” I smile.
Rohan and I go to place the order. "Oh, just one more thing
..." Rohan suddenly leans towards the counter girl "What"s your
name?"
I am taken aback. I didn"t expect that.
"Sir, Swati… Why, do you want my number too?" She
inquired showing the discomfort she was in by such a question.
Rohan"s face falls in disappointment. “No, thanks.” Leaning
back from the counter, “Not unless your name"s Shweta.” And
we came back to our seats.
“Who"s Shweta?” I ask in confusion.
“I dunno.” He was quick… “That"s the problem.”
“If you"re looking for a missing person, we have some great
contacts at the Delhi Police,” suggests Raj helpfully.
“Really?” Rohan"s eyes go wide. “How exciting!”
“By the way which shweta are you looking for?” Raj inquired
curiously.
“Don"t know… but I know she is out there somewhere…
my Guruji told me”
“Really?” “So you believe in all those?” I asked.

Navneet Mehra
Interrupting the talk in between Raj said, “Hey Ashu, what"s
that in your bag?” Pointing towards the magazine I had just read
sometime back. Before, I could answer, Rohan took that out of
my bag and started reading it out loud. ""Everyone is looking for
their soulmate. Take our Love Test and find out: Is She the
One?"" He looks up at me, his eyes wide with excitement. "Oh
wow, I love these things!"
"Why does that not surprise me," says Raj.
I throw him a grateful look "It"s just a bit of nonsense".
"But you have filled it out!" reveals Rohan.
Oh God. Now I feel like a complete idiot.
"I was bored on the Metro, you know what it"s like." I"m
trying to be casual while not looking at my brother. Once, when I
was a teenager, he caught me secretly reading my horoscope and
that of a classmate, whom I"d had a crush on. He teased me
about it for months afterwords.
Years later nothing"s changed.
"Give it to me. I"ll throw it away." I laugh lightly, but Rohan
is bent over it, eyes narrowed in concentration.
"So what was your score? Was she the One?" He looks up,
with an expectation.
"Look, I hate to talk about this, but there"s no such thing as
the One," dismisses my brother.
Rohan"s face drops like a five-year-old who"s just been told
the Candy Bar doesn"t exist. "But you"re married," he protests
urgently. "What about your wife?"
"What about her?" replies Raj evenly. "I love Rita, don"t get
me wrong, but I wouldn"t call her my soulmate."
"You wouldn"t?" asks Rohan.
"No." My brother takes a bite of his Chicken Mcgrill. "I call
her plenty of other things, though," he adds, and laughs.
Rohan turns to me desperately. "What about you, Ashu?" He
turns to me desperately. "What do you think? You believe in the
One, don"t you?"
I hesitate. "Well, hmmm ..."

I Still Love Her
"Oh, I"m so sorry!" Rohan suddenly cuts it. "I"m being so
insensitive." He looks at me, his face full of “I didn't mean that”
expression. "Your brother mentioned you"d broken up with
someone recently."
"You mean Shreya? Oh, she wasn"t anything serious," I
reassure him quickly.
"She wasn"t the One?" he says knowingly.
My mind flashes up a picture of Shreya in her pink top and
blue jeans. Even if things had been perfect, "No, she wasn"t the
One," I laugh.
"Well, don"t worry," he encourages, patting my back. "I"m
sure you"ll find her."
I smile "That"s the thing, I already did."
There"s a loud saying from Raj "Oh God, not the Mall Girl."
"Her name was Tina.” I replied.
He rolls his eyes impatiently. "Ashu, when are you going to
forget about her and move on?"
"I have moved on," I snap back defensively. "I"ve had loads
of girlfriends."
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