2008 June - Wooster School

THE GENERAL 

T H E S T U D E N T V O I C E O F W O O S T E R 

WOOSTER WELCOMES NEW DEAN 

The General Sits Down with Mr. Alex Zequeira 

There aren't many words we 

use on a daily basis that start 

with the letter "Z". That will 

change this fall with the addition 

of our new Upper School Dean, 

Alex Zequeira. Mr. Zequeira, 

who currently lives in Miami, is 

looking forward to becoming a 

part of our Wooster community. 

Recently, Rosalind Brady '10, 

Chloe Woodhouse '10, and I had 

the chance to sit down with him 

and ask him a few questions. 

Here are some excerpts from the 

interview. 

The General: Is there anything 

here at Wooster that has impressed 

you? 

Mr. Zequeira: The most impressive 

thing has been how helpful 

people have been, from the moment 

I came for the interview. It 

wasn't an easy decision. I grew 

up in Miami, I left for college, 

and I worked away from Miami 

for another ten years, and then I 

went back home four years ago. 

Now, I'm kind of leaving again, 

so that's not particularly easy, especially 

since I'm pretty close to 

my family. The people here have 

just made it so easy to deal with 

everything, so I'm really excited. 

TG: How did you find out 

about Wooster? 

Z: I went to Holy Cross, which 

is in Worcester, Massachusetts, 

and once I graduated from there, 

I started teaching at Kingswood- 

Oxford in West Hartford. I 

taught there for nine years, so 

I've always kind of had a connection 

with New England. I enjoy 

living up here. I then went back 

to Worcester to help start a 

school there, and then I moved 

back to Miami. I've wanted to 

come back to New England, so I 

looked at different options in 

the area. I received a job posting 

about this Dean po- by Laina Piera ’10, Kingswood, I 

sition and I started 

coached for three 

researching. From Rosalind Brady ’10, & seasons. Right 

the moment I 

now, I'm coaching 

started looking at Chloe Woodhouse ’10 basketball and 

Wooster, I was re- 

track. I'd like to be 

DIRECTORS 

ally impressed with 

involved with base- 

the jobs program, which was reball, too, which I've coached for 

ally impressive, and the Self- ten years. 

Help mentality. That kind of TG: Is it true that you're inter- 

hooked me. I wasn't sure if I ested in drama? 

wanted to leave Miami, but the Z: Yes, I am. 

day I spent here really hooked TG: You get a gold star. 

me. 

Z: I was actually just in a play, 

TG: Will you be teaching while “A Funny Thing Happened on 

you're here? 

the Way to the Forum”. It's in- 

Z: Yes, apparently I will be teresting to me, because some 

teaching Spanish 1 and two jun- people try to pigeonhole you. 

ior/senior semester elective They say, “If you're in drama 

Latin History classes – one will you can't do this, and if you're in 

be Early Latin American History sports you can't do that.” I've 

and the other one is from inde- been a very successful coach, and 

pendence to today. I'm really ex- I've always tried to be involved 

cited about that, because it's in some capacity with drama. 

something I've studied a lot but You can do both; it doesn't have 

I've never had an opportunity to to be one or the other. In a small 

teach it. 

community like Wooster, that's 

TG: Have you taught Spanish even more important, because 

before? 

you need people who are going 

Z: I have. I'm a native speaker, to do drama, but who are also 

and my parents are Cuban, so I going to do athletic things, who 

grew up speaking Spanish. I are also going to do newspaper. 

taught at Kingswood and taught I'm a firm believer in the concept 

Spanish for nine years. Where I of a Renaissance Man, where 

am now, I teach history, and my you try to be as well-rounded as 

degree is in history, but I'm ex- possible. For me, extra-curricucited 

to go back to Spanish. lar stuff I did in high school 

Teaching a language is very cool helped me really learn a lot about 

because you get to see your stu- myself. 

dents develop. 

TG: What else are you inter- 

TG: Have you decided where ested in? 

you are going to situate yourself Z: I love to read. As a student, it 

in Connecticut? 

was far from my favorite thing 

Z: I think I'm actually going to to do, but now, I can't put a 

be in one of the houses the book down. I also think leader- 

school owns. I'm really excited. ship development is a big prior- 

TG: Will you be coaching any ity. You need to learn how to 

sports? 

deal with other people and mo- 

Z: That's something I have to tivate them the right way. That's 

talk to Mr. MacNutt more a big thing that I value. 

about. The nine years I taught at TG: How about some random 

TG: facts. What's your favorite 

color? 

Z: Red. 

TG: Favorite sport to watch? 

Z: Football. 

TG: Favorite team? 

Z: The Dolphins. 

TG: What's your favorite movie? 

Z: I have a few favorites: The 

Color Purple, Raiders of the 

Lost Ark, and Amadeus. 

TG: Favorite band? 

Z: It's a band you've probably 

never heard of: Hall and Oates. 

TG: Yes we have! 

Z: My music interest is very varied. 

I love Rush. I love classical 

music. I love Led Zeppelin. I 

love John Mayer. 

TG: Here's a personal question: 

are you married? 

Z: No, I am single. 

TG: Single and looking, alright… 

favorite book? 

Z: My favorite book of all time 

is probably… well, I have to 

admit I'm a huge Harry Potter 

fan. 

TG: And did you say you grew 

up in Cuba? 

Z: Well, my parents are Cuban. 

They came over in the early '60s, 

and my brother and I were born 

in Miami. 

TG: What's your favorite food? 

Z: In a biased way, it's Cuban 

food, but I'm not too picky 

when it comes to food. 

TG: Is there anything else you'd 

like to add? 

Z: I'm really excited to come to 

Wooster. Mrs. Cass and Mr. 

Golding have been just absolutely 

unbelievable in their 

support, in not only speaking 

well of the school, but also in answering 

all the questions that I 

have. There is great enthusiasm 

about what the school does. The 

vibe of this place is unbelievable. 

I'm thrilled. 

“Beware the runaway fusion of Strange Quark Nuggets”- Conerned phycists. 

Volume VI , Issue V 

AFTER 32 YEARS, 

MS. HACKETT SAYS 

‘GOODBYE’ 

by Nina Kogekar ’09 

MANAGING EDITOR 

Carol Hackett, longtime 

coach and teacher at Wooster 

school, has decided to retire at 

the end of this year. She will be 

missed by Wooster students and 

faculty, but her enthusiasm for 

teaching, coaching, and the 

Wooster community will not be 

forgotten. Nina Kogekar was 

able to ask her some questions 

about her time at Wooster. 

The General: How many years 

have you taught at Wooster? 

Carol Hackett: I have been at 

Wooster 35 years. I have taught 

and coached for 32 years and 

helped with lower school extended 

day for a year. 

TG: What made you come to 

Wooster in the first place? 

CH: It was suggested to me by 

my Sunday school teacher in 

Pittsburgh, Paul Offell, who 

used to work here. 

TG: What positions have you 

held at Wooster? What sports 

have you coached? 

CH: Girls Athletic Coordinator 

1973-'80, Athletic Director '80- 

'90, Assistant Athletic Director 

'93-present. I coached Varsity 

Volleyball for 32 years, Girls 

Varsity Basketball for 1 year, 

Girls Varsity Tennis for 32 

years, assisted Girls Varsity Soccer 

for 2 years and coached for 1 

year. 

TG: What are some of your favorite 

memories from your time 

here? 

CH: Paddling down Miry Brook 

in a rubber raft, night ice skating 

on the pond, my son born, 

raised, and graduated from here, 

all the great teaching moments. 

TG: What do you plan on doing 

after leaving Wooster? 

CH: I'm moving to Cape Cod 

on June 30th. I plan on spending 

the summer and fall seeing family 

and friends there and enjoying 

my yard and gardens. Then I 

hope to work with elderly services 

in Orleans and Brewster. I 

also plan on visiting my granddaughter 

in Arizona. 

TG: What will you miss the 

most about Wooster? 

CH: The community! I've been 

here over half my life and have 

known so many wonderful students, 

families, and faculty and 

staff members. 

TG: Would you give any parting 

advice to students at Wooster? 

CH: Appreciate everything 

Wooster is all about and give 

something back to a community 

or person in your lifetime. Be 

positive and respectful. 

TG: We know that you have 

taught a great deal to Wooster 

students; has Wooster taught 

you anything? 

CH: I have been blessed so 

much by this community. It has 

taught me to be humble, but 

proud of who I am. I have grown 

as a person morally and spiritually. 

I have learned to be loyal, to 

be a good listener, and to give 

back. I have learned to be myself 

and be happy with who I am and 

what I stand for. The youngest 

children have reminded me to 

have fun and be "silly", and how 

important it is to say something 

nice or positive to someone 

every day. No words can express 

the emotions I am going 

through to leave Wooster, and it 

will always have a huge place in 

my heart and soul. 

Goodbye, Ms. Hackett! 

We’ll miss you and all 

you brought to Wooster!

Volume VI, Issue V THE GENERAL 

June 2008 

FINAL WORDS FROM 

Tiffany Fromage 

Dear Tiffany, 

I hate my job. I am an 

artist stuck inside the body of a 

lawyer. I have two more years 

until my I get my pension, but I 

really don’t think I can last that 

long. How should I let my creativity 

out? Or should I just forget 

about the pension and give 

them my two weeks’ notice? Oh 

jeez, Tiffany, I really don’t know 

what to do. 

XoXo 

Artisticman in Arkansas 

Dear Artisticman, 

It’s been a while since 

I’ve received such a desperate letter. 

You really sound like you 

were on your knees begging me to 

help you when you wrote this, and 

for that I thank you. It is very flattering. 

But enough about me, on 

to you! Well, sir, you have not 

one, but two and possibly three 

things working against you! You 

hate your job, you are an artist in 

Arkansas (blegh!) and the possible 

third is anyone you claim as a dependent 

in your taxes. So let’s put 

the Arkansas factor and the whole 

dependents thing on hold for now. 

I say you should quit. Mother 

Earth made some of us artists for a 

reason! We aren’t meant to stay in 

a stuffy office figuring out how to 

defend people who aren’t innocent! 

We are meant to be free! Just 

picture “Let the Sun Shine” from 

Hair. Artists are supposed to be 

running around in a field, singing 

harmoniously! (If you’ve never 

seen Hair just recall the last scene 

of The 40-Year-Old Virgin.) 

Now, on to Arkansas. There probably 

isn’t much work for you out 

there. And an artistic career could 

be a big financial strain on you 

and the dependents I’m assuming 

you have. But don’t worry about 

that. Always remember: true happiness 

has no price. 



Column 

Too Much Coffee: 

A Man on a 

Mission 

by Paul Kuveke ’10 

COLUMNIST 

Lately I’ve been disgusted 

with hypocritical Americans: 

people like Mr. Bush who has 

said atrocious things which are 

insensitive and insulting to both 

Americans and people from 

around the world, or former 

New York governor Spitzer who 

in his time as attorney general 

paraded around as the sheriff of 

Wall Street and once took down 

prostitution rings but was recently 

found to be using one. 

This particular scandal reminds 

us of many other corrupt politicians 

who have done the very 

things they condemn; one such 

politician is Mark Foley, a former 

Florida congressman who 

spoke out against gays while secretly 

sexually harassing his own 

male pages. The people leading 

our country seem not to respect 

morality: they think that they 

can hide behind the lies and hate 

they feed others. Today I was 

not only infuriated but in utter 

shock when someone told me, 

“Obama shouldn’t be president 

because he doesn’t love our 

country.” Not only is this mindless 

remark wrong, but it also 

shows a pathetic understanding 

of humanity. 

I, like many of my friends and 

family, think that you should 

question everything and believe 

only what you reason to be 

right, not what most people believe. 

Our cowardly president, 

who used his father’s influence 

to hide away in the National 

Guard during the Vietnam War 

draft, said recently on the troops 

in Afghanistan, “I must say, I’m 

a little envious. If I were slightly 

younger and not employed here, 

I think it would be a fantastic experience 

to be on the front lines 

of helping this young democracy 

to succeed.” The hypocrisy and 

lies that have been wrapped 

around the American people are 

suffocating. 

With the world the way it is, it 

is every person’s duty to question 

the things happening 

around him or her. Skepticism 

has never been needed more 

than now, and never before has 

it been considered so unpatriotic 

to be skeptical. You’re un- 

American if you’re against the 

Iraq war, or if you’re against wire 

tapping. Why is that? Why are 

you not supposed to question 

things? As I’ve grown up, I’ve 

been told to question things. 

What will happen to me when I 

die? Should I change my ways 

because someone else tells me 

to? Does God exist? 

The American public now 

won’t even believe that U.S policy 

is partly to blame for helping 

terrorism grow in the Islamic 

countries when clearly it did. It’s 

scary that the people of this 

country are more concerned 

with celebrities and reality television 

shows then the presidential 

primaries. We, the 

Varsity Lacrosse: 

Cult or Tribe? 

AN ANONYMOUS EXPOSÉ 

Many students wonder what 

exactly the Wooster Varsity 

Lacrosse team actually does up 

on Tiedemann Field during 

practice. Some suspect sacrifices, 

others suspect ritual dances, still 

others suspect open warfare. 

Few know, 

and those 

who do have 

never told… 

until now. 

The team 

does not 

condone sacrifices 

in the 

name of the 

Great Spirit, 

the deity of 

the lacrosse 

team whose 

identity is 

not known 

even to this 

r e p o r t e r . 

H o w e v e r , 

the bounties 

of past wars 

are often 

burned to 

fulfill the 

Great Spirit’s 

desire that 

the team never focus on the past 

but only on the future. If you 

look carefully towards the sky 

on Tiedemann Field, you may 

see the smoke of the bonfire that 

the team makes before games 

every week, and if you smell you 

can smell the incense used by the 

team seer to better understand 

which treasures should be sacrificed: 

generally golden lacrosse 

balls, silver sticks, adamantine 

helmets, or silk lacrosse mesh. If 

you listen carefully you should 

hear the war cries of the lacrosse 

team after the ceremonial pyre is 

completed. 

Yet another mysterious event 

occurs in the woods on Tiedemann 

Field, where new players 

are told to go before their first 

practice every year. These players 

go into the woods as children 

and come out as warriors, ready 

to do battle unto death and beyond. 

This rite of passage is confidential, 

and if I were to divulge 

the process, not only would I be 

struck dead by the Great Spirit, 

but my soul would be eternally 

condemned by my fellow 

lacrosse team members. 

people, expect that the people 

we put in charge will make sure 

that what we want happens 

when what we want. However, 

that will only happen if we 

achieve it ourselves. 

Americans today want more 

and more. Many United States 

citizens want more money but 

are less willing to do work. I 

know many people who say they 

are good people; they give to 

charity and they go to church, 

but they don’t practice what 

they preach. Perhaps it would be 

wise to just take a second to reflect 

on the word hypocrite. 

Hypocrite, the Greek word for 

actor, was taken and used by 

Jesus to talk about people who 

followed him and said they were 

men of God but did not live the 

part. Isn’t it ironic that we live in 

one of the most Christian nations 

on earth, a place where 

people believe that Jesus is the 

son of God, and yet our country 

furnishes some of the best examples 

of hypocrisy. I don’t know 

about the rest of you, but I wish 

to follow the rules that guide 

me, and I hope that all who read 

this will do the same. 

Many softball players have 

heard the lacrosse team members 

chanting while stretching, 

but none knows what we are actually 

saying. We are, in fact, 

asking the heroes of our past 

battles to keep us from harm 

while playing 

and to bestow 

upon us for 

but moments 

some longlost 

skill. 

Players that 

have received 

such a blessing 

seldom remember 

what 

they accomplished 

during 

that game, and 

even fewer remember 

what 

the transformationactually 

consisted 

of. The defensemen 

on 

the lacrosse 

team are the 

cult of the 

tribe, the extremist 

group of the extremists; 

so far to the left that they’re out 

the window, yet so far to the 

right that they’re in the next 

room. They have their own traditions 

that occur during the 

game around their cult den. Before 

every quarter they bless 

their den and give it some of 

their own life to create a protective 

ward around it so that no 

balls may enter. The process by 

which this is done is unknown to 

the general public, except those 

fortunate enough to witness it. 

Alas, this reporter has not been 

initiated. 

Whether the above traditions 

make the lacrosse team a cult or 

a tribe is up to you to decide. I 

would be able to give a better 

analysis as to whether or not the 

team is a tribe or a cult if I were 

telling the truth. What the team 

actually does is…. 

Editor’s Note: Author Greg 

Sommers collapsed moments 

later, and remembered nothing 

when he awoke with a splitting 

headache. The dart we recovered 

from his neck disintegrated 

on contact with air. 

STUDENT VOICE OF WOOSTER PAGE 3 

THE SOUNDS OF SILENCE: 

A HYPOTHETICAL MESSAGE LEFT BY 

PAUL SIMON ON ART GARFUNKEL’S 

ANSWERING MACHINE 

by Nick Allred ‘ 09 

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF 

Hello Art, my former friend, 

I’ve called to talk to you again. 

Because the muse has struck 

again tonight, 

And I was hoping we might reunite, 

And yet you just won’t pick up 

the phone, 

I’m left alone 

To hear the sounds of silence. 

I know before we parted ways, 

We had some heady, happy days. 

Helped define a generation, 

And helped entertain a nation. 

We rose up to fight the establishment 

As did our scent 

From the patchouli incense. 

Now I know Dustin Hoffman’s 

pain, 

When he cannot have Elaine. 

We were always just like brothers. 

Let’s face it, Art, we need each 

other. 

And I know you know how to 

tolerate 

When I stay out late, 

Unlike my last two exes. 

(Fun fact: Paul Simon is on his 

third marriage. Further fun fact: 

His second marriage was to Carrie 

Fisher, the actress who 

played Princess Leia in “Star 

W a r s ”.) 

by Nick Allred ’08 


The General took the time 

this issue to interview all of the 

teachers not returning to 

Wooster next year. One of 

these teachers was Mrs. Hamilton. 

The beloved founder of our 

lower school shared a few of her 

thoughts about her time here at 

Wooster, what brought her here, 

and what her plans are for the 

future. 

The General: How did you come 

to Wooster? 

Mrs. Hamilton: In 1990, I was 

completing a two year assignment 

in China and looking for a 

job back in the States. An educational 

placement agency told me 

about Wooster's interest in 

opening a Lower School. Although 

I had never heard of 

Wooster School, I returned to 

the United States for an interview 

in early July and began 

working at Wooster on August 

1st. 

TG: What have you enjoyed 

most about Wooster? 

Mrs. H: Seeing so many young 

The music scene’s not like it 

was, 

Don’t ask me how, why, or because 

Songs are programmed in science 

labs, 

As singers shave their heads in 

rehab, 

And I shed a tear for all the 

songs I know, 

As the radio, 

Blares Enrique Iglesias. 

A Goodbye 

Conversation with Mrs. Hamilton 

children take joy in their learning 

and model the "Wooster 

Way" in their interactions with 

each other. 

TG: What has it been like being 

a "Wooster Family"? 

Mrs. H: It is like living and 

working with your extended 

family. 

TG: How has the Lower School 

changed? 

Mrs. H: Clearly it has grown, 

but it is also so much more fully 

integrated into the life of the 

school than it was in the early 

years. 

TG: How has Wooster changed? 

Mrs. H: When I first came to 

Wooster it was holding tightly 

to its boarding school ways despite 

having only day students. 

Now, Wooster has become a 

solid day school while staying 

true to its mission and traditions. 

TG: How has Wooster changed 

you? 

Mrs. H: Most notably, I was 

married here and have raised my 

three children on campus. 

TG: What do you want to do in 

the future? 

Mrs. H: Short-term - relax, read, 

and learn Italian. 

Supercoliders, Mini-Black Holes, and Strangelets 

by Carl Wolk ‘08 

DEPARTING SENIOR 

The world’s largest physics research 

firm, the Cernier Company 

(CERN), is currently 

pursuing the construction of the 

world’s largest supercollider, a 

machine that accelerates protons 

toward each other at extremely 

high speeds to observe the behavior 

of the sub-atomic particles 

during the collision. The 

collider is 100 meters below the 

Franco-Swiss border, and it 

stretches for 16.7 miles. The 

Large Hadron Collider will accelerate 

the protons at 

99.999999% the speed of light to 

simulate what occurred during 

the Big Bang, but some physicists 

are concerned. Some physicists 

have theorized that 

miniature black holes will be 

formed upon impact, but that 

they will disappear quickly into 

“Hawking radiation.” 

Other physicists, though, 

have expressed concerns that 

this scenario will not take place 

and that the black holes will not 

decay, which would have horrifying 

consequences for our existence. 

Hawking Radiation has 

not yet been experimentally 

confirmed, which has caused 

much of the angst concerning 

the potential threat. Ran Livneh, 

CERN software designer, has 

said, “This physical realm is unknown, 

and dangerous 

continued on page 10



SPORTS REVIEW: SPRING SEASON 

BOYS VARSITY LACROSSE 

by Luke Gilson ’08 


Lacrosse had high hopes this 

year when the 

b e a r d e d 

Spaniard Señor 

C o o k i n h a m 

took the helm 

of the cultish 

ship. The team 

had several seniors, 

including 

Tom Fagan, the 

reigning Defenseman 

of the 

Year, and 

Samuel Brisson, 

who had become 

a comm 

a n d i n g 

presence at 

midfield the 

year before. 

The most notable newcomer was 

Kyle Scheine, who filled the spot 

of goalie and quickly became a 

handful for outside shooters and 

referees alike. 

The championship team was 

forced to realize that the League 

Title was far from secure with an 

early loss to Chase. The team recomposed 

itself for its next 

league game against Marvelwood. 

The Generals came out 

victorious with a strong performance 

from their new goalie, 

who racked up an impressive 

thirteen saves. After crushing 

Watkinson, the Generals had an 

even record. 

The team won its next three 

games, including a memorable 

thrashing of Harvey. 

B O Y S 

V A R S I T Y 

B A S E B A L L 

by Ben Leib ’08 


The baseball team battled 

back this year after losing some 

key seniors, one of whom, José 

Espinosa ’07. is now Amherst’s 

starting shortstop, to win the 

HVAL’s “Valley Division” 

Championship, finishing fifth 

overall in the league. If it weren’t 

for a couple of close losses in 

extra innings against Forman 

and Harvey, the team would 

have had an excellent shot at the 

league championship. Inspired 

by their music maestro Mike 

Murray, the team was led by senior 

captains Andrew Nolan, who 

played first and catcher, and 

Roger Palanzo, who pitched, 

played shortstop and third, and 

discovered that he hits much 

better with glasses than with 

contact lenses. Other seniors included 

Pat Brady, who very successfully 

made the shift from his 

usual spot at second base to centerfield, 

and Ben Leib, who 

picked up the first hit of his career 

(on a bunt). Junior Jordie 

Scheiner and sophomore Alex 

Marinier both had great seasons. 

With a good deal of upcoming 

young talent, coach Dan Levy 

has a lot to look forward 

to for next season. 

A Review of an Eventful Season in Wooster Sports 

Hopes were high as 

Wooster went into the Forman 

game. The previous year Forman 

had crushed Wooster’s 

hopes of being sole league champions. 

Once 

again Forman 

k i l l e d 

W o o s t e r ’ s 

dreams of a 

championship 

season. After 

the loss, the 

team set its 

sights on the 

last two serious 

games of 

the season. 

Wooster came 

into the game 

against Storm 

King with high 

hopes, but 

Jacob Frost ’11 races for a ground ball Storm King 

fought hard and 

took the lead into the fourth 

quarter. In the last few minutes 

Wooster tied it up, and the game 

went into overtime. Storm King 

ended up on top. Wooster then 

focused on South Kent, the team 

it had beaten last year for the 

first time ever. South Kent came 

out with a new vigor this year 

and walloped the Generals 23-4. 

The last game of the year 

proved to be an easy win against 

Woodhall, leaving the Generals 

with a final record of 8-6. Five 

players were selected as HVAL 

All-Stars: Carter Bosch, Sam 

Brisson, Jon Dibble, Kyle 

Scheine, and Tom Fagan. Tom 

Fagan also received Defenseman 

of the Year for the second year 

in a row. 

Record: 8 wins - 6 losses 

V A R S I T Y 

G O L F 

by Carl Wolk ’08 


Going into this season, the 

team had lost its best player, 

Matt Gibbons ’07, and it consisted 

of two seniors, three juniors, 

and three middle school 

students. In the beginning of 

the season, the team was unsure 

about how it would fare against 

this year’s competitors, though 

by the end, it proved itself to be 

one of the strongest teams in the 

league. Jared Rapoport ’09 was 

clearly the most talented golfer 

on the team, and he usually 

scored in the low 40’s for nine 

holes. Seventh grade Richie 

Randolph ’13 was an unexpected 

help to the team, playing second 

on the team during matches. 

Richie should become a very talented 

golfer in a few years. With 

only two seniors leaving, the 

team should fare well next year. 

We ended the season as second 

in the HVAL, behind South 

Kent. 


Bobby Ciralli hits a hard line-drive into left field 

GIRLS VARSITY TENNIS 

by Thea Goodrich 


Varsity Girls Tennis had a 

tough season 

this 

year due to 

sicknesses 

and absences, 

but 

they managed 

to 

make it 

t h r o u g h 

with a final 

record of 5- 

5, finishing 

s e c o n d - 

place in the 

H V A L . 

With relatively 

easy 

wins against Forman and Oakwood 

Friends in early April 

pointing to a good run, the 

match against Chase stung players’ 

egos as all but the third doubles 

team lost. Fortunately 

everyone emerged victorious 

playing Marvelwood at home at 

the end of April, but they were 

not so lucky the second 

time around on Marvelwood’s 

turf on May 10th, where 

they were defeated 1-6. 

Cheshire was a close game in 

the hot sun, in which the Lady 

Generals were beaten by only 

one game (having come into the 

match already 

forfeiting one 

because of illness).Christian 

Heritage, 

newcomers to 

the league, 

proved hardy 

competitors; 

though our 

o p p o n e n t s 

won 5-2, all of 

the lost 

matches were 

very close. 

This year, the 

Sarah Newman, a leader of the team. 

team had to 

endure the 

nail-biting pressure of at least 

five tie-breakers and thankfully 

avoided the looming possibility 

of playing for the first time on 

rubberized indoor courts during 

the final match. The team would 

like to issue a fond farewell to 

departing seniors Sarah Newman, 

Elizabeth Yankowski, and 

Thea Goodrich, and give a very 

special thanks to Coach 

Carol Hackett for all of her 

time, generosity, and support. 

LOOKING BACK...GIRLSVARSITYVOLLEYBALL 

by Holly Wickham 

CONTRIBUTING WRITER 

This year’s varsity volleyball 

season was a 

major success. 

With the help of 

our loyal fans, we 

had an undefeated 

season. It 

was Ms. Hackett’s 

32nd and 

final season 

coaching girl’s 

volleyball, and we 

were glad to have her as our 

coach .The camaraderie of the 

team was helped by Mr. Golding’s 

“we are all geese” speeches 

before all major games. 

We beat our rival, Chase, 

twice and won the HVAL tournament 

for the first time in 

Wooster volleyball history. We 

went on to the 

New England 

t o u r n a m e n t , 

where we 

knocked out 

Chase again and 

placed third after 

our loss to Kings 

Wood Oxford. 

The prospects of 

next year are 

looking promising as most of 

the team is returning to the 

sport. 

GIRLS JUNIOR 

VARSITY TENNIS 

by Melissa 

Svenningsen ’11 


JV Girls Tennis was awesome 

this year. Although many of our 

players were new to tennis, we 

learned a lot, played well, and 

had lots of fun. Our team had 

two unfortunate losses during 

the season. First, one of our second 

doubles players, Marie Albert, 

had a concussion and was 

therefore out for the season. 

This incident brought our team 

down to seven players. Second, 

when the seniors left for SIS, we 

lost our first singles player, Angelica 

Baca, leaving our team 

with only six players and ten positions 

to fill. Surprisingly, it 

wasn’t too hard to do. Every 

game a few players had to play 

two games, and they played 

them both well. We only had a 

problem when we played a memorable 

game against Westover 

and two of our teammates called 

in sick, bringing the number for 

that day down to four players. 

On that day, everyone had to 

step up and play positions that 

they had never played before. 

One of the third doubles players 

had to play fourth singles, and 

everyone had to play multiple 

games. This team really stepped 

up to the plate when necessary. 

With Mrs. Tchourilova as 

coach, we worked hard every 

day, but we also had tons of fun. 

We always had good humor, 

even when we lost, and when we 

won we were ecstatic. Although 

we only won three games and we 

lost six, we always played to our 

fullest and had a blast. After 

every game we celebrated, either 

with Oreos, brownies, or stopping 

at Carvel. We definitely 

stuck together as a team, and we 

all got along very well. This was 

a fantastic season, and, as long as 

we get a few more players, next 

year will be just as great. 

Record: 7 wins - 8 losses Record: 9 wins - 2 losses Record: 15 wins - 0 losses Record: 3 wins - 6 losses

Volume VI, Issue V 

BOYS VARSITY TENNIS 

by Ben Ross ‘09 


As many in the Upper School 

community may know, the 

Wooster Boys’ Varsity Tennis 

Team has had a tumultuous season, 

but these difficulties didn’t 

stop them from playing hard, 

winning key matches, and growing 

stronger as individuals and as 

a team. 

The team began the season 

strong, winning three of its first 

five matches. This momentum 

slowed as the season dragged on 

and as the matches increased in 

difficulty. In addition to the 

challenging opponents, the team 

also dealt with the loss of its two 

top players. Working to overcome 

this challenge, Jake Fisher 

moved into the number one 

spot, and each other player 

jumped two spots as well. The 

team continued to play well and 

managed to draw wins from unexpected 

players. In the final 

match of the season, Jake Fisher 

played number one against an 

older and more experienced 

player whose serve, said one bystander, 

was “the fastest I’ve 

ever seen from a non-pro.” Jake 

met this challenge 

and pulled out a win. 

This kind of spirit is what the 

Wooster Boys Varsity Tennis 

season was centered around. 

Even in the face of adversity, the 

team played their hardest and 

often surprised themselves and 

their coach. Ms. Najman, for 

her part, inspired the team to 

play as hard as they could and 

gave them the strength they 

needed to win against strong 

teams. She also showed immense 

patience as she dealt with 

every possible challenge that a 

group of rowdy young men 

could throw her way. 

All in all, despite our record, the 

team’s season was a success. 

Even when playing with all of 

our players out of their normal 

places we were still able to win 

matches and hold our own 

against difficult opponents. 

These challenges made us work 

even harder than usual and allowed 

us to grow even more as a 

team and to grow as individuals. 

This year’s team will certainly be 

remembered, but not just for its 

rambunctiusness. We will go 

down in Wooster history as the 

team with the CLEAREST 

EYES, the FULLEST HEARTS, 

and the INABILITY TO 

LOSE…. “NEAL!” 

Record: 4 wins - 6 losses - 1 tie 

BOYS JUNIOR VARSITY 

by Nick Allred ’09 


Each team has a different definition 

of success. For some 

teams, it is making the cut for 

the HVAL Tournament. For 

other teams, it may just be finishing 

a season at or over .500. 

And then there’s JV Boys’ Tennis. 

Last year, the Wooster JV 

Boys’ Tennis Team was winless. 

The year before that, we were 

also winless. Our goal, our aspiration, 

our wildest dream for the 

season was to win a single 

match. I am proud to say that 

we did! When we began the season, 

about half of our players 

had never touched a racket in 

their lives. Practices were 

TENNIS 


difficult with three courts and 

twenty players, and ended up 

being a raucous affair, with a 

lot of yelling, quite a bit of 

pegging, and the occasional 

round of Bakugan. Our ‘correctional 

cross-country training’ 

must have toughened us 

up, though, because we felled 

Kildonan late in the season 

and played Forman close 

twice. 

Ultimately, we had a successful 

season, and caught a 

whiff of the intoxicating perfume 

of victory – which smells 

nothing like the Boys’ Locker 

Room. We hope to have another 

‘successful’ season next 

year, and once again get a 

breath of that heady aroma 

of glory. 

THE GENERAL 

by Beth Svenningsen ’09 


When thinking of the 

Wooster School Varsity Softball 

team, the first things that 

come to mind are water fights, 

Frosties, and Oreos. This season, 

practice with the team, 

after the initial deathly climb 

up the massive hill to Tiedemann 

Field, came as a relief 

after many of the stressful and 

brain-straining days of the second 

semester of my junior year. 

We had a plethora of new 

players this year! The team attracted 

two middle schoolers, 

Jordan Dunn and Heather 

Muessle. Our new players from 

the Upper School were Devon 

Hellman, Olivia Kinnear, Kate 

Kelly, and Kelly Wieman. Our 

returning players were Jillian 

Bosshardt, Celina Curillo, 

Holly Wickham, Gretta Reed, 

and I. Veteran player Katie 

Young joined us once again for 

her last Wooster sports season 

after playing lacrosse for several 

years. This eclectic group of 

people could not have been 

more determined to have fun 

and be entertaining. 


GIRLS VARSITY SOFTBALL 

I had the most laughs I’ve had 

on any team, and learned that 

Jillian is the best Oreo-licker 

around, that Heather likes to 

lick her toes to freak people 

out, and that I, Beth, can roll 

on the ground faster than 

Gretta can run. 

Although we didn’t have a 

winning season, the quality of 

play and determination to master 

the sport were extraordinary. 

Many of the new players 

had never even picked up a ball 

before, but that didn’t stop 

them from learning and honing 

their skills. The “old” players 

improved by working towards 

mastering the sport. Our very 

own Holly Wickham was a 

New England All-Star, playing 

at right field in the All-Star 

game! 

Our record was 2-10, but it 

does not reflect the hard work 

that was put into the team. We 

dominated the first of three 

games we played against the 

New York Military Academy, 

scoring eleven runs in the first 

inning and connecting for 

twenty-three hits overall, which 

racked the score up to a whopping 

twenty-five runs by the 

game’s end. We defeated 


A T H L E T I C A W A R D S 

J. WILLIAM NYSTROM SCHOLAR-ATHLETE AWARD 

Sam Brisson and Katie Young 

ALVAH JESSUP OUTSTANDING ATHLETE AWARD 

Conchita Giraud, Mallory Kahn-Johnston, and 

Andrew Nolan 

THOMAS E. WILCOX AWARD FOR SCHOOL SPIRIT 

IN COMPETITIVE ATHLETICS 

John Dibble and Katie Young 

WOOSTER'S CHAMPIONSHIP TEAMS 

GIRLS VARSITY BASKETBALL, 

HVAL Season and Tournament Champions 

Volleyball - Girls Varsity, 

HVAL Season and Tournament Champions 

Lacrosse - Girls Varsity, 

HVAL Season Champions 

SPORTSMANSHIP AWARDS 

GIRLS VARSITY BASKETBALL, 

Officials 

BOYS VARSITY SOCCER, 

WNEPSSA 

WOOSTER SCHOOL, 

HVAL 

NEW ENGLAND TOURNAMENT TEAMS 

Girls Varsity Volleyball 

Girls Varsity Basketball 

Girls Varsity Soccer 

Congratulations 

to all Wooster Sports 

teams on their successful 

seasons! 

SOCCER - BOYS VARSITY 

Andrew Nolan 

SOCCER - GIRLS VARSITY 

Mallory Kahn-Johnston, 

Casey Orr, and Katie Young 

CROSS COUNTRY - VARSITY 

Vanessa Courchene-Roy and 

Chris Wickham 

VOLLEYBALL - GIRLS VARSITY 

Holly Wickham 

VOLLEYBALL - GIRLS JV 

Susie So 

BASKETBALL - GIRLS VARSITY 

Nicola Matero and Larissa 

Santos 

BASKETBALL - BOYS VARSITY 

Andrew Nolan 

BASKETBALL - GIRLS JV 

Annie Keeler 

BASKETBALL - BOYS JV 

Jack Barrett 


Darrow nineteen runs to three, 

with the Woo going the entire 

game without any errors. In 

many of the lost games, we 

trailed closely in runs and 

played with fortitude. We competed 

against many teams out 

of Wooster’s league, such as 

Chase Collegiate and King & 

Low-Heywood Thomas, but 

even those beastly teams, which 

serve as feeding grounds for 

college teams, couldn’t bring 

down the positive attitude of 

our team. We made it to the 

first round of the HVAL and 

put up a good fight against 

NYMA! The final score was 7- 

8 runs, but the team did not go 

down in vain. We remember the 

shining moments of the game, 

like when Celina got her first 

hit of the season! 

“What’s the most important 

thing to remember? Have fun!” 

That is what the Wooster Varsity 

Softball team kept in mind 

this season, especially when 

playing teams in higher divisions. 

We persevered through 

all of our games, despite the 

score. Though we may not 

have had a winning season, we 

were definitely the team that 

had the most fun. 

MOST VALUABLE PLAYERS 

TENNIS - BOYS VARSITY 

Jake Fisher 

TENNIS - GIRLS VARSITY 

Grace Hamilton 

BASEBALL - BOYS VARSITY 

Jordie Scheiner 

SOFTBALL - GIRLS VARSITY 

Holly Wickham 

LACROSSE - GIRLS VARSITY 

Conchita Giraud and Mallory 

Kahn-Johnston 

LACROSSE - BOYS VARSITY 

Sam Brisson and Tom Fagan 

GOLF - COED VARSITY 

Jared Rapoport 

TENNIS - GIRLS JV 

Sonima Randhawa 

TENNIS - BOYS JV 

Brooks Frey



A 1700-acre compound belonging 

to the Fundamentalist 

Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day 

Saints, a polygamist sect 

that broke off from the Church 

of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day 

Saints, was raided by police after 

they received a tip from 16-yearold 

girl held there. 401 children 

were removed from the compound. 

A court has ruled that 

the children will be returned to 

their families in the compound 

immediately. 

In May, the downward trend 

seen in sectarian violence in Iraq 

continued, and US troop deaths 

are at their lowest levels since 

the invasion. 19 soldiers were 

killed in May, and there were 

also continued reductions in 

civilian casualties. Oil production 

has also reached a post-war 

high of 2.5 million barrels per 

day. Military officials have partially 

credited the US troop 

surge for the reduction in violence. 

The Department of the Interior 

named polar bears as an endangered 

species on the basis that 

melting ice in the Arctic due to 

global warming is destroying the 

polar bear’s habitat. However, 

the Department warned against 

using the polar bear’s new status 

to regulate greenhouse gas emissions 

via the Endangered Species 

Act. Governor Sarah Palin of 

Alaska has told reporters that 

the state of Alaska will sue to 

challenge the polar bear’s status 

on the endangered species list. 

She is suing on the basis that 

global climate models projecting 

a loss of Arctic sea ice have been 

found unreliable. 

Lebanon Steps Back from Brink of Second Civil War 

by Gretta Reed ’09 

NEWS DIRECTOR 

After months of struggle, 

Lebanon has elected a new president. 

The government had been 

in turmoil since November, leaving 

the country without a sitting 

president for months. The agreement 

lead the way for General 

Michel Suleiman to become 

president. 

The Lebanese people had 

feared a repeat of their devastating 

Civil War in the late 1970’s 

and 80’s. Like many other countries 

in the Middle East, 

Lebanon has had problems with 

sectarian violence. The country 

has many Shiites loyal to 

Hezbollah, which had been occupying 

parts of Beirut since 

2006, living in tents that covered 

six blocks of the capital city. 

One of the first signs of the new 

peace agreement was these tents 

WORLD NEWS 

On April 18, former president 

Jimmy Carter met with exiled 

Hamas leader Khaled Meshaal as 

part of the former’s Middle East 

tour. According to Hamas, a 

Palestinian political party, 

Carter suggested that a truce between 

the Palestinian Authority 

and Israel be signed and that 

Palestine stop launching missiles 

into Israel. In the United States, 

many political leaders reacted 

negatively to his visit. Many Republicans 

have criticized Carter 

for his unofficial visit, and even 

Democratic presidential candidate 

Barack Obama remarked 

that "we must not negotiate with 

a terrorist group intent on Israel's 

destruction. We should 

only sit down with Hamas if 

they renounce terrorism, recognize 

Israel's right to exist, and 

abide by past agreements." 

Ted Kennedy, Democratic Senator 

from Massachusetts, was recently 

diagnosed with a 

malignant brain tumor. Democratic 

and Republican politicians 

have expressed their support for 

Senator Kennedy. Robert Byrd 

of West Virginia wept on the 

Senate floor, saying, "Ted, Ted, 

Ted. My dear friend. I love you 

and miss you." A surgery to remove 

much of the tumor was 

successful, and Kennedy plans to 

undergo chemotherapy and radiation 

treatment. 

being dismantled by Hezbollah. 

Although Hezbollah and the 

Lebanese government have had 

issues for some time, the trouble 

was started more recently when 

the government made a move to 

shut down the illegal Hezbollah 

communication network. 

Hassan Nasrallah, the 

On April 24, members of Congress 

were briefed on intelligence 

that indicates that North 

Korea was helping Syria build a 

nuclear reactor. Last September, 

an Israeli airstrike destroyed the 

site, which has since been rebuilt 

and has not yet allowed a visit 

from UN inspectors. The Syrian 

government has denied the 

claims. A Syrian ambassador to 

the UK said, “This has nothing 

to do with North Korea and 

Syria. They just want to exert 

more pressure on North Korea. 

This is why they are coming up 

with this story.” 

Two major natural disasters 

struck in Asia over the past two 

months. Over 100,000 people 

are dead after a tropical cyclone 

hit shore in Myanmar, a country 

in Southeast Asia. The government 

was reluctant to let large 

amounts of foreign aid into the 

country; their policy likely 

caused the death toll to climb as 

high as it did. In central China, 

a magnitude 7.8 earthquake 

struck, destroying buildings and 

dams throughout the countryside. 

Over 50,000 people were 

killed. 

leader of Hezbollah, demanded 

the government revoke the action, 

and took it as an act of war 

on the group. When they refused, 

Hezbollah moved into 

West Beirut. From there 

Lebanon sat on a scary situation 

for months, in which 81 people 

were killed. The Lebanese 

people braced themselves 


ODD 

NEWS 

A Bicycle Lobbyist group from 

the Netherlands plans to teach 

people across the country to 

steal bikes. The lessons started 

in cities, but after seeing riders 

become more security-conscious 

after the lessons, the Group 

planned to turn the program national. 

A Singaporean man has been 

jailed for three years after being 

found guilty of faking his own 

death. After accruing massive 

debt he moved to Sri Lanka and 

obtained a death certificate. His 

family was then able to collect 

$243,000 in insurance money. 

After obtaining a fake Sri 

Lankan passport, he returned to 

Singapore several times and 

eventually remarried his wife and 

fathered another child. The scam 

was eventually found out by a 

Singaporean lawyer. The man’s 

ex-wife and brother were also 

imprisoned for the scheme. 

A Fox News employee is suing 

the building where she worked 

for an undisclosed amount due 

to bed bugs. The women was allegedly 

bitten several times between 

October 2007 and April 

2008. After reporting the incidents 

to Human Resources she 

was ridiculed and her office was 

not treated for several months. 

She now claims to be suffering 

from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder 

due to the incident and is 

unable to work. The owners of 

the building deny responsibility 

claiming tenants are to control 

pests. It seems in this case that 

the bed bugs did bite, and hard. 

for another civil war. 

On May 25th, the parliament 

elected Sulieman as Lebanon’s 

12th president. In his remarks, 

Sulieman showed a desire to set 

aside sectarian differences and 

learn from the non-violent resolution 

reached just days before. 

He said he would prefer better 

relations with Syria, who backs 

Hezbollah, but also spoke out 

against terrorism. 

The deal reached is a good 

resolution after the months of 

struggle. It outlines a 30 member 

cabinet in which 16 majority 

members, 11 opposition members, 

and 3 members to be filled 

by the president. The opposition 

now has the power to veto major 

decisions, which was a major 

concern for them. 

Overall, the tension has reduced, 

and Lebanon hopes that 

the resolution can hold them 

through, keeping them from 

war. 

An Indonesian Businessman, 

Tung Desem Waringin, threw 

100 million rupiah out of a plane 

on Sunday, June 1, as a marketing 

ploy for his new book. In 

2005 Tung rode a horse through 

the country’s capital, Jakarta, 

dressed as one of the Indonesia’s 

most celebrated war heroes. 

The toilet is broken aboard the 

International Space Station. Astronauts 

have been forced to dispose 

of liquid waste in plastic 

bags after the toilet made a “loud 

noise” and stopped working. Relief 

is on the way, however. The 

shuttle Discovery launched last 

Saturday carrying spare parts to 

fix the pump. Plans are in the 

works to expand the cosmic 

lavatories by adding another toilet 

to the space station. 

A Japanese man discovered a 

woman who had allegedly been 

living in his closet for several 

months. The 57 year-old man set 

up a hidden camera after food 

began disappearing from his 

kitchen. The woman had managed 

to amass a mattress and 

plastic drinking bottles in the 

closet where she resided. She has 

been arrested for trespassing but 

police refused to comment any 

more on the story. 

Citizens in London responded 

to a ban on drinking in the transportation 

system by having one 

last hoorah in the subway system. 

During “the last round on 

the underground,” partiers, 

dressed in fancy clothing, drank 

alcohol, and partied in the subway. 

On the last night of the 

party, things turned ugly, with 

fights erupting and chaos ensuing. 

The police were forced to 

intervene, and several trains were 

damaged and had to be withdrawn 

from service.



Imminent 

Climate Change 

by Carl Wolk ‘08 


Instead of attempting to control 

climate, let’s learn to live 

with it and change our lives as it 

changes its habits. From proxy 

data, we know that climate is in a 

continual state of change. During 

the early half of the millennium, 

the Medieval Warm 

Period (800-1300 AD) was 

prevalent in much of the world 

(Loehle 2007). 

During that time, the Vikings 

settled in Newfoundland and 

Greenland, regions that had typically 

harsh, cold climates. But 

during the warm period, the ice 

sheets surrounding Greenland 

melted, and the climate became 

warm and very habitable. During 

this period, vinyards flourished 

in Britain (Lamb 1966), 

and the European economies 

boomed. Agricultural outputs 

increased dramatically, marshes 

dried up, which in turn removed 

the breeding grounds for 

Malaria-carrying mosquitos 

among other things, greatly reducing 

the amount of disease. 

The healthier Europe thrived intellectually. 

The warm period, though, did 

not last forever. Soon, the high 

level of solar activity 

crashed during 

what is now called 

the Maunder Minimum. 

During the 

Little Ice Age (1300 

- 1800), the very 

opposite happened; 

the Vikings were 

driven out of 

Greenland by 

famine and disease 

until all of the settlements 

had either 

been abandoned or 

slowly died out; glaciers in the 

Swiss Alps advanced, crushing 

farms, the harvesting season became 

much shorter and more 

unreliable; famine and disease 

struck Europe; winters became 

much more severe with heavy 

snowfall that did not melt; in 

1780, the New York Harbor 

froze, and it was possible to walk 

from Staten Island to Manhattan; 

famous violin-maker Antonio 

Stradivari’s violins were 

made of denser wood from the 

cooler weather, thus creating the 

unique tone; Finland lost a third 

of its population to disease and 

famine; in Ethiopia and Mauritania, 

permanent snow sat atop 

mountain peaks that are now 

dry; violent storms were more 

common; and warm weather 

crops were abandoned in China. 

Since then, solar intensity has 

increased dramatically, to, according 

to one study, its highest 

levels for 8000 years (Solanki 

2004). During this period we 

have seen increasing temperatures, 

and Greenland’s climate 

has returned to its pre-Maunder 

Minimum state. The United 

Nations Intergovernmental 

Panel on Climate Change (UN 

IPCC) has declared that a scientific 

consensus exists and tells us 

that humans are significantly 

warming the Earth through the 

burning of hydrocarbons, and 

that an apocalyptic future awaits 

us if we do not act. Yet, the 

IPCC and other governmental 

bodies are completely ignoring 

about 20% of climatologists 

who do not agree with the 

IPCC’s viewpoint (Pielke Sr. 

2008). The Petition Project includes 

31,072 American scientists 

who have signed a 

petition stating that human 

emissions of CO2 have not and 

will not cause catastrophic 

warming. But this is beside the 

point; what I am trying to explain 

is that natural changes in 

the sun can cause substantial 

changes in global temperature 

(through total solar irradiance), 

precipitation (through changes 

in the solar wind (Svensmark, 

2000)), and wind trends 

(through changes in UV radiation). 

This is especially relevant because 

a paper was recently released, 

entitled, “Sunspots may 

vanish by 2015.” Written by 

William Livingston and Mathew 

Penn of the National Solar Observatory 

in Tuscon, this paper 

uses recent variations in solar behavior 

to project that the Sun 

may hit another solar minimum 

in the next decade. If what this 

paper projects does occur, there 

will be very large consequences 

for civilization. This massive, 

sudden shift in climate would 

surely cause chaos in many unstable 

regions, where crop failures 

could cause famine and 

disease, much like what occurred 

during the Little Ice Age. 

The Sun’s intensity changes in 

cycles, most notably an 11 year 

cycle. The projection 

by Livingston 

and Penn looks beyond 

the cycles to 

observe what 

trends are occurring 

in the characteristics 

of the 

sunspots themselves 

rather than 

looking at the number 

of sunspots per 

cycle. Even if this 

projection turns 

out to be false, the 

next two 11-year solar cycles are 

expected to be weak according 

to analyses of changes in solar 

dynamics. Solar cycle 24 has 

failed to start (as seen by the lack 

of sunspots with opposite polarity 

from solar cycle 23), and as 

each day goes by with no solar 

cycle 24 sunspots, cycle 24 is 

likely to be shorter and less intense. 

Beyond that, NASA has 

made a projection for cycle 24 to 

be the weakest for centuries. 

To make matters worse, global 

oceanic indexes are currently 

going negative, and may cause 

the Earth to experience a cooling 

trend in temperatures over the 

next decade or two. The Pacific 

Decadal Oscillation and the 

North Atlantic Oscillation have 

both seen warm periods over the 

past two decades, causing increased 

surface warming. Now, 

these oscillations are going negative, 

and will contribute to the 

cooling that may be caused by 

the sun. 

Recent trends in natural climate 

phenomena may be indicating 

significant global cooling 

during the next few decades, yet 

the Senate has been debating 

whether a cap-and-trade system 

to limit greenhouse gas emissions 

from the United States 

should be passed. The economic 

disruption that this policy and 

others would have on the global 

economy would be immense, 

and it would all be done with the 

false context that we can control 

climate. Even if these projections 

of solar activity turn out to 

be false, policymakers must realize 

that climate is far beyond our 

control. Climate changes when 

it wants to, and that time may be 

now. 

The above graph shows global temperature over the past 2000 years, created by Craig Loehle, Ph.D.. 

Around 1000 years ago, global temperatures began falling, and the Little Ice Age occured as a result 

in the 16th and 17th centuries. Some projections of solar intensity may suggest that the Earth is 

headed for another period of cold temperatures like the Little Ice Age. 

FAREWELL INTERVIEW WITH 

MR. MACELHINEY AND 

MS. RUSSELL 

by Nick Allred 


Mr. MacElhiney and Ms. Russell 

are individually some of the 

most beloved teachers on campus, 

but together they are a 

Wooster icon. The General sat 

down with both of them separately 

and asked them about how 

they came to Wooster, what 

they have done here, and, most 

importantly, how they met. 

MR. MACELHINEY 

The General: How did you first 

come to Wooster? 

Mr. MacElhiney: I came to 

Wooster at 23, after spending 

my first year in Colorado working, 

skiing, and volunteering 

with an organization that taught 

skiing to the disabled. At some 

point during my senior year in 

college, I decided that I would 

pursue jobs and activities that I 

was genuinely passionate about 

and stepped off my medical 

school path. Working and skiing 

out west was the first on my 

list. Coaching was my second. A 

friend, who taught in a boarding 

school, said that independent 

schools hire uncertified teachers 

and usually required them to 

coach. It seemed like a good way 

to get a job coaching 

TG: What drew you to 

Wooster? 

Mac: They gave me a job. 

TG: How did you first meet, 

and when did you begin dating? 

Mac: We met on the day we interviewed. 

She had flown over 

from graduate school in England. 

I distinctly remember that 

she was not particularly friendly. 

She claims it was the "travel fatigue.” 

I will let her answer the question 

about when we started dating. 


most about working at 



Mac: Working with the students. 

TG: What are you planning to 

do next? 

Mac: I will be heading to 

Columbus, Ohio where I will be 

the Upper School division head. 

TG: What have you tried to 

teach your students most of all? 

Mac: Beyond "being safe, driving 

carefully, and making good decisions?" 

I think that on some 

level I have most wanted students 

to learn that membership 

in a community comes with responsibility 

to help contribute 

and maintain it. Community is 

at the same time durable and 

fragile, and to make it work best, 

we all need to have a "sense of 

the other" and recognize that we 

are part of something greater 

than ourselves. 

TG: What have you learned 

from Wooster? 

Mac: Many, many things from 

many, many people of all ages. 

At this moment, I think I would 

like to say that I have learned 

how to be my best self, as well as 

the craft of teaching and administrating. 

Thank you so much! 

MS. RUSSELL 

The General: How did you first 

come to Wooster? 

Ms. Russell: I was finishing my 

Masters in Medieval History at 

the University of Manchester in 

England and I heard about a job 

teaching Latin and Geography at 

a school in CT. I had worked in 

a CT boarding school, Westover, 

after I graduated from college, 

so I was sort of familiar 

with the area. I thought it would 

be great to be able to teach both 

history and Latin as I was interested 

in both. 

TG: What drew you to 


ER: When I got to Wooster 

to interview, I was 

ER cont.: impressed by how 

deeply committed the students, 

teachers, and administrators 

were to the school and its mission. 

The then headmaster, John 

Cheeseman, gave me a tour of 

the school and it was clear that 

he truly loved the place. It was 

welcoming and laid back, and I 

thought, “yeah…I could work 

here.” 

TG: How did you first meet, 

and when did you begin dating? 

ER: Mr. MacElhiney was actually 

the first person I met at 

Wooster. We interviewed on the 

same day. (insert ‘awwwww’ 

here.) The funny thing was that 

I totally blew him off. I had 

flown in from England the day 

before, so I was jet-lagged out of 

my mind and once I realized that 

he was not interviewing for the 

same job…I wasn’t interested in 

chatting. We didn’t really start 

hanging out for another year and 

a half. That first year I knew 

him as Mr. Everett’s roommate 

who was never home. We 

started dating in our third year at 

Wooster. 


most about working at 


ER: Without question, I have 

enjoyed working with my students 

and my players most of all. 

I get to be a part of their lives in 

a helpful and meaningful way. 

That’s a gift. My students and 

players make me laugh, out loud, 

every day. They are smart, kind, 

funny, creative, and really interesting. 

I have a great job. 

I have also had the opportunity 

to make great friends here. 

I get to go to work every day 

with a great group of friends, 

and that’s pretty cool. 

TG: What are you planning to 

do next? 

ER: My plans right now are to 

open a tutoring business. That 

way I get to continue working 

with kids…but I get to sleep in 

every morning. Long term, I 

hope to continue working in 

schools as a psychologist. I have 

a masters in school psychology 

and would like to... 

continued on page 11



SENIOR WILLS 

Each year the Seniors are given the task of creating a 

list of ‘things’ they are leaving behind them as they graduate 

and to whom those things belong. These written 

works are traditionaly known as “Senior Wills” and they 

are usually published in the school yearbook. This year 

it is The General’s distinct pleasure to publish them here 

in this medium. Enjoy. 

-Ben Ross 


I, Thea Goodrich, leave… 

To Grace: Fat-filled ice cream, chem study sessions, my crazy-tiredness, 

groaner puns, the ROTC (Random Officials That Clap), obsequious 

waiters, South Norwalk, my fifth-grade drawing of Sailor 

Moon, an under-bite, Kinoki foot pads, Milton’s red stapler, 

“monastery,” and chocolate chip Hello Kitty waffles. To Dora: Some 

pirates, advice from your inner chicken junior, JKR’s magic finger, 

a fast internet connection, Grace’s foot (you found it, after all), 

“wem’n’nems,” dumpster-diving near Grand Central, wizard swears, 

pyrotechnic displays in Grace’s den, and the joys of British men fistfighting 

over beautiful you. To Chris: My organizational skills, fun 

times in France, and all of the course catalogs in the college guidance 

room. (You still owe me a disco ball.) To Katie: The job Williams- 

Sonoma should have given you. To Ben: The entirety of Wikipedia 

(or perhaps my Google skills), Populism at 3:15 in the morning, instructions 

on how to fry an egg, authentic Welsh monikers, a healthy 

dose of poetry, and a dorm room complete with ball pit. To Elizabeth: 

The permission to change your last name to “Bennet” or 

“Austen” as you so choose. To Nina: Bus-ride conversations and a 

winning season, of course! (Plus Mace for emergencies.) To Gretta: 

My spectacular rendition of “Bohemian Rhapsody”—what more 

could you want? (Okay, I guess I’ll throw in an awkward turtle as a 

souvenir.) To Nick: Good ol’ McAlister, the sound judgment to accept 

that pirates are better than ninjas, and a baking pan complete 

with homing device. To Tessa: My spelling (though you can keep 

your lovely penmanship) and some British mystery novels, along 

with bear hugs, Cool Whip, Shins concerts (!), the permission to go 

to sleep once in a while, and many, many spoonerisms. To My Freshman 

Gals: Sage (ha) advice whenever you need it. (Seriously. It’ll 

make me feel important.) To Ms. Read: My Yearbook Avenue expertise, 

the “face of cliff,” Hugh Laurie, what’s left of my own 

photo-related sanity, and many thanks for all of the food, long 

hours, sanctuary, and laughs. To The General: Fewer production 

hang-ups, an actual scoop, and the very best of luck. To echo: My 

eternal love and devotion (and some chocolate-covered pretzels, 

too). 

I, Sarah Newman, leave. . . 

As I leave Wooster, I must leave behind so many special things. 

Besides my friends and relationships I have formed with teachers 

and coaches, there are other things I will miss. I leave my Spanish 

Club to Philip Sementilli, who I know will cherish it for years to 

come. I leave my Hebrew Club to Gaby Espinosa who I know will 

continue the traditions that have formed over the past two years. 

Hebrew Club really meant so much to me and I know she will take 

care of it as if it were her own. I leave the Hebrew Club poster to 

Jordie Scheiner. In case of an emergency, I would leave all my decoders 

and jar of beans to Ben Ross to protect. If anything ever happens 

to me, I leave Liz Broder all of my Jewish things, including 

menorahs, “The Source of Everything Jewish,” all of my dreidels, 

the blue tulip bag filled with our Hebrew Club things, and that 

bracelet (the one we both own) so she could have two of the same 

bracelet. I leave Jonny Svenningsen my computer and reggaeton 

CDs so he can jam out even though I won’t be there to enjoy it. I 

leave Kelly my other CDs, my bike, all of my camera equipment, my 

pool, and all of my jewelry in case she wants it. I leave Patrick Brady 

all of my sports equipment. I leave Dylan Herman part of Hebrew 

Club as well as the tennis team and all of our trophies. I leave Holly 

Wickham with my advice and an important list. I leave Rosalind 

Brady everything else. Good luck to everyone and I hope that everyone 

has a long, happy life! 

I, Marian Wright Barrett, leave… 

that square of carpet in the library to John Thatcher, that light bulb 

in the chapel to Annie-baybay, that blade of grass on Coburn lawn 

to Darcy, the empty fish tank to Cole Tee-Dubs, that vat of mayonnaise 

in the kitchen to Elisabeth Eckwoman, and my darling mother 

to all the people who throw care to the wind and sign up for drama 

next year! All the ladiez on lacrosse, you get positivity! Oh, and all 

my yellow cards, I don’t need them where I’m going… 

I, Luke Gilson, leave… 

Boring hours at newspaper to 

Ben Ross, as well as numerous 

filler articles of varying length. 

To Nick Allred I leave my trusty 

belt and sneakers. I leave the 

Wooster School Board of 

Trustees—as well as various 

other administrators—my article 

on Wooster School finances entitled 

“Wooster Finances: Good 

News!” Hopefully, my sacrifice 

of journalistic integrity was not 

purely for the purpose of propaganda, 

and Wooster is in fact financially 

sound. I leave all my 

photo equipment to the Darkroom. 

May you smell of toxic 

chemicals and be light tight for 

the years to come. Drama, take 

my pants. 

I, Carl Wolk, leave... 

To Jared, Joe, and Kevin: I 

leave you Operation Take the 

“Woos” out of Wooster. 

To Nick:: I leave you in the 

care of cool cats above. 

To Ben:: Quark. Have fun. Remember 

to justify. 

To Paul: I have nothing to leave 

you. Mr. Schmidt has taught 

you all you need to know. 

I, Mike Murray, leave… 

To Carl: The contents of your 

pocket. To Pat: The shoe I got 

hit in the face with at Ozzfest. 

To Raag: 4 tickets to Sweden. To 

Zakk: An orange polo. To Chris: 

your heart, in a bag! To Dora: A 

car. To Vanessa: A jackhammer, 

to eliminate all curbs and roadside 

obstacles before you hit 

them. To Luke: The space this 

will takes up in the newspaper, 

and the 15 minutes of my life 

that I wasted writing this. You’re 

welcome 

I, Benjamin Leib, leave… 

To Luke: As my spouse, doesn’t 

everything default to you? To 

Carl: A lifetime subscription to 

the New York Times, a third 

floor tom, a couple of degrees of 

atmospheric temperature increase, 

and at least half of a hovercraft. 

To Katie: Enough 

money to cover the cost of a 

speeding ticket. 

Pat: I’d give you something, but 

as the Sage, you’re supposed to 

be eschewing material needs. To 

Roger: Eric Gagne-style goggles 

to hit with and a Mets team that 

doesn’t suck. 

Jonny: At least four years of an 

Obama presidency. To Kelly: 

fond memories of Mr. Lebetkin. 

Chris: tickets to the Met. To 

Thea: the Internet. To Sumeet: 

A bio presentation. To Duncan, 

Mike and Zack: Frisbees. To 

Dibble: Some goals in soccer 

(not that I have any to give). To 

Chappy: eSlips. Have fun. To 

Kevin Dull: Left fullback 

GOODBYE 

LIMERICK 

There once was a school 

called the Woo 

For which thanks was long 

overdue, 

So with a farewell 

And mountain laurel, 

Great '08 admits we love 

you. 

-Anonymous 


I, Dorothy Stuart Rice the First, Leave…. 

Brad: your Star Wars poster (that I will be taking to college), 

Bazoomers, the front seat, the computer, and all of Mom and Pops’s 

attention (enjoy). Jack: a collection of sea shells, Santa boxers, a 

sheet that actually fits the pull-out bed, your weight in meat and 

cheese, a promise to bear your children if I don’t have any of my 

own, and the life lesson taught to us all by Abe Lincoln: “If you are 

a racist I will attack you with the North.” Grace: a handicap parking 

pass (the spaces are bigger), a raft with a GPS, Alien Bikini Babes, 

“git ’er done,” vanity plates for the tank, and tickets to the Simba 

Circus. Thea: a letter to Hogwarts, a tall, dark, and handsome drink 

of water, a crowbar, Converse, chocolate, thirty-three dollars, and a 

character in one of my many horribly tacky chick books (Longing, 

Lynching and the Luscious Librarian). The Trio: popo sirens, Uno’s 

salads, adventures in the tank, the “Juno” soundtrack, horse pictures, 

Kenny from Build-A-Bear, a place to stay whenever you two need 

one, and Voldemort’s nipple. Kates: a shout-out on my first rap 

album, a Cees of Ruht Beer, Red Sox tickets, a yellow Corvette with 

the lights that flip up, an apology for “hanging out with you guys all 

year,” and my respect and gratitude. Chris: a DMV manual, snuggles, 

soy ice cream, and many thanks for always being there. Mike: many 

thanks for driving me and Brad, and tickets for the two of us to see 

Frank Sinatra and Ozzy in a duet concert. Bleib: Some nicknames 

and a friendly baseball rivalry in which we both know I’m right. 

Carter, Sam, and Dibble: “never have I ever” games, OTL, snuggles, 

and memories from G period. Dev: the collected poems of Helen 

Stiener Rice, a trip for two to “Ukrainea,” and a seat to my left whenever 

you want. Kate: a mole on your ear, long blonde hair, “American 

Idol,” and dancing school. Chandler: salt pictures on the lunch 

tables, a bad joke about the South, and my respect for eating all those 

crackers in one minute. Molz and Trish: memories of some awesome 

times. Kris: a Rick Roll, the Monster from “Lost,” a monkey for 

your back, and 143 sheeps playing tennish. Max: an undying belief 

that you are the devil and the knowledge you have a good-looking 

father (…hey Mr. Hastings). Justin: a giant hug and a fork and knife 

(use them). Cal: hummus. Sean: hugs, name-shouting, and the reassurance 

that you are not emo. Chess: advice whenever you need it, 

good or bad. Cass: DPS, my first love (Winston), and a deep appreciation 

for all you have done for me. Chris and Evan: squeezes. Marcel: 

my love. George: a hug. Mr. Street: gratitude for a great year, 

chunky peanut butter for you to share with Paul Tillich, and fond 

memories of Two-Way Street. Danny-boy: a similar feeling about 

modern art (“That’s a cat?! Oh, I thought it was a bird.”) and apologies 

for your nickname. Mr. Cataldo: “I’m being followed by a moon 

shadow,” “drink deeply from the trough of life,” and the reminder 

to keep it sexy, not sexual. Ms. O: a long story on my surgeries involving 

descriptions of fecal matter in a bag. Ms. Read: my respect 

and a deep gratitude for your teaching me to love Shakespeare and 

writing. Hack: the knowledge that you are a bum (but a stellar one). 

Everyone else: my love and hope that you all will Carpe some Diems. 

I, Jon Dibble, leave... 

To Cooper: I leave you my fuse and resign my captain position to 

you. Please defend our reputation as the best defense in the HVAL, 

and never change who you are, because you are hilarious and awesome 

and no one can ever change that if you don’t let them. I love 

you (don’t tell Eliza…). 

To Marcel: I leave you my white dance moves so that you may remember 

them when you show off in the student center. I also leave 

you our lunch table so that you may keep it as amusing as it was to 

sit at this year for many years to come. Don’t you run from me! 

To Kyle: I leave you our amazing defense plays in lacrosse (“Run 

tiger-shark!”), but more importantly, my respect and friendship. 

Please help Cooper hold down the fort with me and Tom gone. I 

know you can—you’re the best freakin’ goalie the HVAL has ever 

seen, and you’re only a freshman. I’ll miss you, sunshine! 

To John, Greg, and Chess: I leave you my trust: make sure you guys 

kill people in lacrosse and make the games fun to watch next year, especially 

when I come. John, you are great; make sure you keep annoying 

attackmen the way you do. Greg, you’ve grown to be a 

respectable player; make sure you step up next year. Chess, you get 

better with every practice; I’ve never seen a defenseman evolve the 

way you have. No matter what happens, don’t ever, ever give up. 

To Jen: I leave you a French-to-English dictionary so that when you 

come back from Spain-land you can understand what I’m saying to 

you. I miss you very much, so please come home! 

To Darcy and Annie: I leave you my hugs and pictures Trish took of 

us: Friday nights at the Keeler house; sitting in the “truck”; going to 

the Windmill…there are too many to count. Trisha didn’t get to 

write a will, so she says she loves you guys. (I do too, for the 

record…) 

I, Dennis Moran, leave to… 

Lizzie: a big hug (even though she hates them), and my cubbies, 

plus all of the gossip EVER. Dish it, girl! Cole: the grounds staff! 

And I guess the job area that goes with it...and the position of 

Making Fun of JV Tennis Because They Still Have to Do It. Erica 

and Lisa: whatever it was that you wanted that I forgot to write 

down and therefore forgot. JV Abstract Painting Team: 

2 (open to interpretation!)



ANGELICA BACA 

SIS Project: Working at Pegasus Therapeutic 

Riding 

Plans to attend: Western Connecticut State 

University 

MOLLY BARRETT 

SIS Project: Working at Cake Haven Bakery 

Plans to attend: SUNY Purchase 

CARTER BOSCH 

SIS Project: Building a treehouse. 

Plans to attend: Hobart and William Smith College 

PATRICK BRADY 

SIS Project: Working at UBS in Middlebury 

Plans to attend: Bucknell University 

SAM BRISSON 

SIS Project: Working at Danbury Neck and Back 

Plans to attend: Hendrix College 

LIZ BRODER 

SIS Project: Interning at a public relations firm 

Plans to attend: Santa Clara University 

ALY CABRAL 

SIS Project: Working at Waterbury YMCA 

Plans to attend: University of Hartford 

VANESSA C-ROY 

SIS Project: Office Assistant at St. Rose School 

Plans to attend: James Madison University 

JON DIBBLE 

SIS Project: Building a treehouse 

Plans to attend: Lehigh University 

TOM FAGAN 

SIS Project: Intern with a Youth Pastor 

Plans to attend: Gordon College 

GRACE GALIE 

SIS Project: Intern at the Metropolitan Opera 

Plans to attend: Skidmore College 

LUKE GILSON 

SIS Project: Independent Photography Project 

Plans to attend: New York University 

CONCHITA GIRAUD 

SIS Project: Kindergarten Aide/Athletic Trainer 

at Wooster 

Plans to attend: Frostburg State University 

THE GREAT ’08 

SIS AND COLLEGE PLANS 

THEA GOODRICH 

SIS Project: Intern at the Brookfield Library 

Plans to attend: Kenyon College 

ON-YOU JUNG 

SIS Project: Producing a comic strip 

Plans to attend: University of Connecticut 

MALLORY KAHN-JOHNSTON 

SIS Project: Teacher's Aide in Middle School 

gym classes 

Plans to attend: Washington College 

TRISHA KEELER 

SIS Project: Working at an orphanage in Ghana 

Plans to attend: SUNY Purchase 

BEN LEIB 

SIS Project: Building a hovercraft 

Plans to attend: Brown University 

KELLY MACINTYRE 

SIS Project: Taking a bicycle trip from PA to VA 

Plans to attend: University of Vermont 

ZACK MIDURSKI 

SIS Project: Building a Rube Goldberg machine 


DENNIS MORAN 

SIS Project: Producing a comic book 

Plans to attend: Rhode Island School of Design 

MICHAEL MURRAY 

SIS Project: Practicing survival skills 

Plans to attend: Winthrop University 

SARAH NEWMAN 

SIS Project: Teacher's Aide at Veterans Park 


CINDY NGUYEN 

SIS Project: Independent Photography Project 


ANDREW NOLAN 

SIS Project: Intern at the Danbury Police Dept 

Plans to attend: Sacred Heart University 

ROGER PALANZO 

SIS Project: Working at Michelina's Bakery 

Plans to attend: St. Joseph's of Philadelphia 

SUMEET RANDHAWA 

SIS Project: Working at a Fanily Medicine Practice 

Plans to attend: Boston University 


DOROTHY RICE 

SIS Project: Working with special needs 

preschoolers in Redding 

Plans to attend: Earlham College 

JOSH ROSENTHAL 

SIS Project: Attending weight 

management program at Duke University. 

Plans to attend: Hobart College 

DUNCAN STAFFORD 

SIS Project: Video documenting 

Mike's project 

Plans to attend: Hobart College 

JON SVENNINGSEN 

SIS Project: Campaigning for 

Barack Obama 

Plans to attend: Tufts University 

CHRIS WICKHAM 

SIS Project: Working at 

Boehringer-Ingelheim 

Plans to attend: Swarthmore College 

JACK WICKHAM 

SIS Project: Studying German 

Plans to attend: MacAlister College 

CARL WOLK 

SIS Project: Building a hovercraft 

Plans to attend: Washington & Lee 

University 

ELIZABETH YANKOWSKI 

SIS Project: Crafting miniatures 

Plans to attend: Sarah Lawrence 

University 

DAVE YELLEN 

SIS Project: Working for Cumulus 

Media at 1-95 and Y-105 radio 

Plans to attend: Indiana University 

KATIE YOUNG 

SIS Project: Taking a bicycle trip from 

PA to VA 

Plans to attend: Eckerd College 

Goodbye, Seniors! 

Thank you for all of your energy, joy, creativity, and humor these past four years!



GOOGLING 

GOOGLE 

by Laina Piera ’10 

Production Director 

Without a doubt, one of the 

best-known websites in the 

short history of the Internet is 

Google. In fact, the term 

"google" can be used as a noun or 

verb, showing the astounding influence 

of this incredible search 

engine. Many people do not 

know, though, that Google and 

its employees have created many 

more useful tools. In fact, the 

multibillion dollar company has 

created dozens of other helpful 

web applications. Gmail and 

Google Maps are relatively wellknown; 

however, fewer have 

heard of Google Book Search 

and Google Image Labeler. 

Here are several well-known 

and not-so-well-known Google 

products that you should look 

out for: 

Gmail: Gmail is Google's version 

of web-based email. With a 

sleek, clean look and large storage 

capacity, Gmail has attracted 

millions of followers since its release 

in 2004. If you are a student 

at Wooster, your 

Woosternet email account is 

through Gmail. 

Link: http://mail.google.com/ 

Google Earth: Google Earth is 

a virtual globe program that uses 

NASA shuttle radar to view our 

world in a way we haven't before. 

Mountains, houses, and 

even cars can be seen on your 

computer screen in stunning resolution. 

Many people enjoy 

searching their home addresses 

and seeing their neighborhoods, 

but it's perhaps more fulfilling to 

see other countries and continents 

and realize that the Earth 

is a large, beautiful place. 

Link: http://earth.google.com/ 

Google Maps: Google Maps is a 

less intricate version of Google 

Earth that can be seen through 

your web browser. Although it 

also uses images from space to 

see our world, it's mostly used as 

a map for getting from Point A 

to Point B. Simply type in your 

start address 

and end address 

and it 

will show 

you the best 

route, with helpful options available 

like avoiding highways or 

toll roads. There are also many 

sub-applications, including 

Google Transit, Google Street 

View, and Google Ride Finder. 

Link: http://maps.google.com/ 

Going to the library is 

so overrated. 

Google Book Search: Going to 

the library is so overrated. Book 

searching is quick and simple 

with this tool. This online library 

has over 1 million books in 

its database. One can search by 

book genre, title, topic, and 

more. Sometimes, though, only 

a select few pages or snippets 

are available. Although it has 

caused controversy over alleged 

copyright infringement, it is a 

great convenience. 

Link: http://books.google.com/ 

Google Image Labeler: Perhaps 

the most fun of Google's creations, 

the Image Labeler is a fun 

game that is also very helpful to 

Google. 

The screen shows you and 

your randomly generated partner 

a picture of something on 

the Google Images database. 

You and your partner then type 

in keywords that you believe 

correctly describe the picture. 

When you and your partner type 

in the same keyword, you earn 

points and go on to another picture. 

By means of this game, the 

pictures on Google Images are 

tagged and labeled correctly, 

since both you and your partner 

agree on the proper keyword. If 

you are bored, the Google Image 

Labeler is a great way to kill 

time. 

Link: 

http://images.google.com/imagelabeler 

Google Mars: 

Haven't you ever 

wished you could 

see, in detail, what 

Mars looks like? 

With Google Mars, 

you can almost 

sort-of do that! NASA has provided 

Google Mars with data 

from a couple of Mars missions, 

and just like Google Maps does 

with the Earth, this handy site 

shows users the surface of our 

closest neighbor. Users can 

choose to see the surface in 

black and white, a colorful relief 

map, or infrared. The project is 

still being tested, but it's still 

amazing to see the Red Planet. 

Link: http://google.com/mars 

Google Suggest: Google Suggest 

is Google's main search engine 

with a twist. As a 

search keyword is 

typed in, a list of possible 

terms is shown underneath 

the text box, 

along with the number of search 

results. For example, after typing 

in the keyword "Wooster," a 

list is shown that includes 

"Wooster College," "Wooster 

Stock," and "Wooster School," 

with our favorite showing 

191,000 search results. Google 

Suggest may not be as innovative 

as other products, but it's still a 

cool alternative to the 

Experimental Schedules: 

by Nina Kogekar ’09 

MANAGING EDITOR 

We're done! After spending 

six weeks of our academic year 

going through three experimental 

schedules, Wooster Upper 

School students and teachers can 

now look back on the three 

schedules and decide which is 

their favorite. Many people agree 

that Wooster should either keep 

the same schedule or use the 

third experimental schedule. 

Even those who do not wish to 

change the schedule agree that if 

they had to choose an experimental 

schedule, they would 

choose the third one. Others 

propose that we create a schedule 

that has some elements of 

the experimental schedules and 

some elements of our current 

schedule. 

Why the third experimental 

schedule? Perhaps one of the 

reasons that it was favored is 

that out of all the schedules it 

was closest to our current schedule. 

Unlike the first schedule, 

there were no super-long classes, 

and unlike the second schedule, 

it was a one week schedule. 

Some of the popular aspects of 

the third schedule were the fact 

that there were labs on Wednesday, 

there were less classes on 

Wednesday, and periods where 

the Upper School congregates 

(such as Assembly and Chapel) 

were after lunch. The fifty 

minute classes were debated 

among students – some found 

them effective, others found that 

they dragged on, and still others 

said it depended on the teacher. 

Most, but not all students liked 

having only six periods per day 

original Google search. 

Link: 

http://www.google.com/webhp?c 

omplete=1&hl=en 

Google Patent Search: Google 

Patent Search is every up-andcoming 

inventor’s dream. 

Google Patent 

Haven't you ever Search’s database 

wished you could see, contains over seven 

in detail, what Mars million entries of— 

looks like? With you guessed it— 

Google Mars, you can 

patents! Although 

the majority may 

almost sort-of do that! be ordinary, a lot of 

the patents fit a 

weird sense of humor perfectly. 

Patents you can search and view 

include those for underwear, a 

toilet seat deodorizer, a chicken 

breading machine, and a nose 

hair trimmer. Each patent page 

includes the patent number, inventor(s), 

date, detailed 

sketches, claims, and a scan of 

the official United States patent. 

So before telling all your friends 

that you’ve just created a magnificent 

suit to protect you 

against giant oceanic creatures, 

Google Patent Search can easily 

tell you that the Shark Protector 

Suit is, in fact, already in existence, 

and its patent number is 

4833729. 

Link: 

http://www.google.com/patents 

There are dozens more fun 

Google products to choose 

from. So take with a pinch of salt 

the verdict of a certain 9th grade 

English teacher when she tells 

you that Google is bad! As a 

very wise person once said, 

"Google is the greatest thing 

since sliced bread." 


THIRD TIME’S THE CHARM 

(and four on Wednesday). 

Those who liked the rotational 

system said it was because it decreased 

the homework load. 

Labs periods were also shortened 

to twenty minutes in order 

to accommodate the schedule, 

and this fact was considered one 

of the more unpopular features 

of this schedule. Students argued 

that twenty minutes was not 

long enough to accomplish anything 

for clubs, and students 

with music lessons during labs 

did not appreciate the fact that 

their lessons were cut short. 

However, despite the shortcomings 

of the third schedule, most 

students agree that they preferred 

it to the first and second 

schedules. 

One of the prominent aspects 

of the first experimental schedule 

was that it had seventy 

minute classes on Tuesday and 

Wednesday. The rest of the 

week, classes were forty-five 

minutes long. While some students 

and teachers found these 

periods effective, many thought 

that they were too long, and 

made the days seem longer (the 

idea of how long the day "feels" 

seems to be an important factor 

in whether students or faculty 

like a schedule). Also, the first 

schedule did away with all labs 

periods, replacing them with the 

mysterious looking "X Period", 

designated on the schedule for 

extra help, Wooster Singers, and 

music lessons. There was also 

one "Activities and Clubs" period; 

however, most people are 

in multiple clubs, so it did create 

some problems for people. 

Probably one of the main reasons 

that students did not favor 

COLLIDER continued from page 3 

phenomena might arise…Any 

physicist will tell you that there 

is no way to prove that generated 

black holes will decay. The 

consequences of being mistaken 

are unfathomable. 

This 

subject deserves 

serious 

unbiased discussion.” 

Another 

fear is that 

t h e o r e t i c a l 

particles referred 

to as 

Strangelets, a 

form of 

strange matter, 

would 

form and create 

a “runaway 

fusion 

process” that 

could cause the entire planet to 

be transformed into strange 

matter. 

Other physicists, 

though, 

have expressed 

minimal concern 

over the potentialconsequences. 

One 

such physicist is 

Lubos Motl, a 

Czech physicist, 

who has referred 

to those pursuing 

the idea that 

the supercollider 

could destroy 

existence as 

“catastrophic” scientists. He 

writes in his blog “The Reference 

Frame,” “The [Large 

Hadron Collider] is not going to 

destroy life on Earth. The probability 

of such an event is ‘zero’ 

in ordinary people's (or experimental) 

understanding of 

the second schedule was because 

it was a two week rotational 

schedule. It would be difficult 

for students to know whether 

we were on the first or second 

week, especially after vacations. 

Also, the second schedule shuffled 

around the order of some 

congregating periods. For example, 

on Tuesdays, Self-Help occurred 

before lunch and 

Wooster Singers was taking 

place concurrently, so Wooster 

Singers members were exempt 

from jobs for Tuesdays. This did 

not work out so well because 

classrooms and the dining hall 

were cleaned before lunch, but 

then they were used again for 

lunch and the last class of the 

day. Also, allowing some students 

to miss jobs did not seem 

fair to other students. Also, one 

unpopular aspect of the second 

experimental schedule was the 

fact that it extended Wednesdays 

to the length of a normal 

day. Considering sports, this 

would probably make game days 

more difficult. 

One of the unintended effects 

of these three experimental 

schedules was that they convinced 

some students that our 

current schedule is very effective 

and should not be changed. 

Many of us realized how many 

aspects of our current schedule 

we take for granted – such as 

labs and short Wednesdays. 

Also, some students said that 

the fact that we had these scheduling 

experiments made it harder 

for them to be organized and 

get their work done. 

the word ‘zero.’ The nonzero 

number we obtain is just an abstract 

academic issue.” 

Concerned citizens have filed 

a lawsuit in federal court to stop 

the $8 billion project that took 

14 years to complete, though it 

appears that 

the experiment 

will 

i n d e e d 

occur as 

planned, and 

many physicists 

expect 

to gain a 

tremendous 

amount of 

knowledge 

from the 

i m p a c t . 

Some have 

t h e o r i z e d 

that the collision 

could 

create the Higgs Boson, a theoretical 

elementary particle that is 

predicted to exist by the Standard 

Model of 

physics. If created, 

the existence 

of the 

Higgs Boson 

could help confirm 

the Standard 

Model, 

which would 

explain how 

elementary particles 

acquire 

mass. This 

would be relevant 

to the discovery 

of a 

Grand Unified 

Theory, which would explain the 

existence of the strong nuclear 

force, the weak nuclear force, 

and electromagnetism, and perhaps 

even why gravity is such a 

weak force compared to the 

aforementioned forces.



The General 2008-09 Staff 

Editors-in-Chief: Ben Ross '09 

and Nick Allred '09 

Managing Editors: Nina Kogekar '09 and 

Chloe Woodhouse '10 

News Director: Gretta Reed '09 

Production Director: Laina Piera '10 

Features Directors: Rosalind Brady '10 and 

Tori Haynes '11 

Billy Joel wrote 

this famous song, 

a tribute to the 

world events from 

his generation 

(1949-1989), after 

a conversation he 

had with John 

Lennon’s son, 

Columns Director: Ryan Eick '09 

Campus Beat Director: Alec Isaacs '10 

Proofreader: Dr. Timothy Stunt 

Faculty Advisers: Dr. Timothy Stunt and 

Mrs. Anne Gilson 

THE STORIES 

BEHIND THE SONGS 

by Ryan Eick ’09 

COLUMNS DIRECTOR 

“We 

Didn’t 

Start the 

Fire” 

Sean. Joel feels that his generation 

was not responsible for 

these events, particularly the 

Cold War, the events of which 

are frequently mentioned in the 

song. Until the last stanza, every 

other event represents a year. 

Joel wrote the lyrics for this 

song first, something he rarely 

does. According to Joel, this is 

why it has no real melody. Despite 

this song’s popularity, 

however, Joel does not like it. 

Many people want him to make 

a sequel to the song, addressing 

the events that happened in the 

next generation, but he has consistently 

refused. Some of the famous 

people referred to in the 

song are Harry Truman, Joe 

DiMaggio, Joseph McCarthy, 

“Hips Don’t Lie” 

Few people who have heard this 

Latin-pop dance song can believe 

there is much of a story behind 

it. However, there actually 

is. It comes from something 

Shakira used to say to her songwriters 

if they wanted to know if 

Richard Nixon, Marilyn Monroe, 

the Rosenbergs, Marlon 

Brando, Dwight Eisenhower, 

Josef Stalin, Nelson Rockefeller, 

Albert Einstein, James Dean, 

Davy Crockett, Elvis Presley, 

Nikita Krushchev, Charles de 

Gaulle, Buddy Holly, Fidel Castro, 

John F. Kennedy, Ernst 

Hemingway, Adolf Eichmann, 

Bob Dylan, Malcolm X, Ho Chi 

Minh, and Ronald Reagan. 

a song they were working on 

needed to go or not. According 

to Shakira, when she hears a 

good beat, she can’t help but 

move her hips. “I would tell 

them, listen, hips don’t lie.” says 

Shakira. “If they’re not moving, 

it’s not working. If they shake, 

then we’re in good shape”. 

Shakira then took this inside 

joke and put it to music. Shakira 

decided to do this song with the 

famous rapper Wyclef Jean. 

Jean’s producers wanted him to 

do a remix of another song, but 

he decided instead to do this, 

which he thought would be a big 

hit. Later, Jean said, “I guess my 

instincts were right”. The costumes 

and people in the music 

video of this song were inspired 

by the Barranquilla Carnival, 

which is from Shakira’s hometown 

in Columbia. 

“Revolution” 

While at a transcendental 

meditation camp in India 

with the other Beatles, legendary 

rockstar John Lennon wrote this 

politically charged song about 

the Vietnam War. However, 

John Lennon had a big problem 

getting the right voice for this 

song; his normal voice just 

didn’t do it. So, in an experimental 

session, Lennon sang this 

while lying down on a grand 

piano. The sound felt perfect, 

and that is how Lennon ended 

up recording the song. There 

were 2 versions to this song: the 

fast version that was released as 

part of the single “Hey Jude”, 

and a slow beat version released 

in the White Album. Apart from 

lying down on a grand piano, 

both versions of this song have 

an incredibly dirty guitar sound, 

something not usually associated 

with the Beatles. As a matter of 

fact, the guitar sounded so distorted 

that people who bought 

the records kept on returning 

them, thinking they were 

scratched. Seven years after John 

Lennon was shot, this song was 

used in a Nike commercial. This 

angered a lot of Beatles fans, 

who thought that Nike was 

being disrespectful of Lennon’s 

legacy by using a political song 

in such a light context. 

by Roy Kerwood 

NewPrefect’s Perspective 

by Ben Ross 


Although this column has not 

been written this year, in the 

past it was a regular fixture of 

any issue of The General. And 

so, for this, the first and last Prefect’s 

Perspective column of this 

academic year, I’d like to talk 

about growing up. 

If you didn’t stop reading 

there, I’m grateful. I know this 

is a cliché topic that can often 

turn into gushy reminiscences, 

but I bring it up because it is 

something on our minds this 

time of year. As we approach 

graduation it seems to hit us all 

that we are on the precipice of a 

new era in our lives. The status 

quo is grumbling and groaning, 

about to change, and we realize 

that very soon we will be thrust 

into the unknown. Freshman 

will become Sophomores, Sophomores 

will become Juniors, 

Juniors will become Seniors, and 

Seniors will leave our community, 

venturing into a truly foreign 

land about which they 

know very little. This change is 

viewed differently by everyone. 

Some see it as an opportunity for 

a change of pace, as they have 

become bored with the work 

and stress of this year. For others, 

like me, this change is seen 

less as the start of something 

new, but as the end of something, 

something we are not sure 

we want to end. I, and the 

rest of my class, are about to become 

Seniors. This change has 

caused me to suddenly realize 

how quickly my High School 

years have flown by and how little 

time I have left here at 

Wooster. In a year’s time I will 

be on the platform at the graduation 

ceremony; it will be me 

leaving this community. I’m 

sure some of you reading this 

will wonder, “Why is he so upset 

about being done with high 

school?” You may think, “I 

wish I were the one graduating 

next year.” And while I see the 

immense opportunities lying 

before me. 

MACELHINEY, 

RUSSELL 

INTERVIEW 

CONTINUED 

Ms. Russell cont.: either get certified 

or pursue a PhD so I can 

be back in schools and help the 

students get through their days 

and years a little easier. 

The General: What have you 

tried to teach your students 

most of all? 

ER: I try to teach them that it’s 

OK to get excited about stuff. 

It’s ok to be a little nerdy ( I 

model that one). At the risk of 

sounding ‘cheesy’ though, the 

thing I have tried to teach them 

the most is that they are going to 

be just fine. I hope they leave 

my classroom feeling good 

about themselves, and if they 

have learned some Latin…that’s 

a bonus. 

TG: What have you learned 

from Wooster? 

ER: I have learned how to be a 

teacher at Wooster. I have 

learned who I am, who I want to 

be, and how I want to get there. 

I have learned what it means to 

feel like what you do matters 

and who you are matters. I have 

(and also the happiness of having 

put high school behind me), 

I can’t help but look back on the 

years of my youth and wonder, 

“Did I do everything right? Did 

I do everything that I wanted to 

do?” Because once you step out 

into the big-bad-world there is 

no turning back. The doors of 

opportunity that were open to 

you before are now locked forever. 

Countless new doors have 

opened, that’s true, but you 

can’t help but wonder what lay 

behind those doors that you left 

unexplored. 

I suppose, in the grand scheme 

of it all, these recollections serve 

little purpose. Time is a fastmoving 

current that bears us all 

along our way at a pace that cannot 

be changed. There is nothing 

we can do now but accept 

the reality of our past andcontinue 

into the future. However, 

if there is any small 

purpose these thoughts and recollections 

can serve I hope it 

would be this: I hope that you, 

underclassmen, realize what a 

gift you have in the years that 

you have left here. Enjoy them. 

Take pleasure in the small things 

that occur every day, not just at 

Wooster but with your friends 

and family. Look out for each 

other. Try to keep the bigger 

picture in mind. 

Juniors, as we approach our 

Senior year I hope you will 

heed this advice as well. It’s 

our last year living at home 

with our parents and our last 

year in this special place. Let’s 

take the time to enjoy it. 

Seniors, your time here has 

come to a close. But not to 

worry, the time you’ve spent 

here has been with a purpose 

and a clear direction. You have 

left your mark upon this place 

(both literally and figuratively), 

and you will not be forgotten. 

Don’t focus on the doors that 

have closed, but instead look to 

the new ones you will be able to 

explore starting this fall. 

So, enough with the gushy 

reminiscences. Life is waiting. 

Let’s enjoy it. 

learned that you can have a 

strong academic program without 

losing sight of the importance 

of teaching social literacy. 

Finally, I have learned that even 

after ten years, I still think middle 

schoolers are a riot. 

STUDENT VOICE OF WOOSTER PAGE 11



Campus Beat: A forum for sharing opinions, 

stories, folklore, legends, cultural mores, 

and true confessions. 

MOLLY B ’08 

“Ms. Patricia Carol Keeler” 

DORA RICE ’08 

“One of Mr. Street’s tissue 

boxes. The one with the bunnies. 

Sneak attack or with his 

blessing..” 

ON-YOU JUNG: “Knowledge 

and English skills.” 

MIKE MURRAY ’08 

“The idea that the best solution 

to any problem is the 

forming of a committee to address 

the problem, then a 

committee to solve the problem, 

then another committee 

to measure the reaction to the 

solution of the problem.” 

THE GENERAL 

Student Voice of Wooster 

JON DIBBLE ’08 

“Marcel.” 

Editors in Chief: 

Ben Ross ’09 and Nick Allred ’09 

Production Director: Laina Piera ’10 

Managing Editors: Chloe Woodhouse ’09 and 

Nina Kogekar ’09 

News Director: Gretta Reed ’09 

TRISHA KEELER ’08 

“MARIAN WRIGHT 

BARRETT!” 

Features Director: Rosalind Brady ’10 and 

Tori Haynes ’11 

ANGELICA BACA ’08 

“I will bring all the laughter 

and smiles we all shared! 

Corny!” 

SARAH NEWMAN ’08 

“I will bring all the memories 

that I was fortunate enough to 

have in Mr. Hackett's room, 

aka the Hebrew Club Meeting 

Center/Sanctuary. I will 

bring all the Hebrew Club 

group photos that we took 

and... I will bring memories 

of each kid in club and honor 

their commitment forever. 

And I am dead serious.” 

CAMPUS AMPUS BEAT EAT 

JACK WICKHAM ’08 

“A fork from the dining hall 

(my true home).” 

MALLORY K-J ’08 

“I will bring all the advice 

that my friends and teachers 

have given to me.” 

TOM FAGAN: ’08 

“I’m going to take back the 

mountain laurel” 

CHRIS WICKHAM ’08 

“A sixteen pack of Charmin. 

Legend has it college toilet 

paper is like cardboard... I 

agree with Mike. I'll head the 

committee-electing committee; 

if you want to join, please 

check Moodle.” 

Proofreaders: Thea Goodrich ’08, Nick Allred ’09 

Columns Director: Ryan Eick ’09 

Campus Beat: Alec Isaacs ’10 

Staff Writers: Paul Kuveke ’10 

Cartoonist: Cole Tucker-Walton ’09 

Faculty Advisors: Dr. Timothy Stunt and 

Mrs. Anne Gilson 

all additional images from the public domain 


CARTER BOSCH: ’08 

“Marcel McCollough.” 

GRACE GALIE ’08 

“I will bring the habit of 

picking up every piece of litter 

I see.” 

SAM BRISSON: ’08 

“I'm taking Mr. Gaudet. OH 

WAIT! He's already gone...” 

CINDY NGUYEN ’08 

“I will bring the habit of not 

walking on not-walkable 

grass, stacking plates, and 

cleaning up after myself every 

time I eat or go out to eat, because 

I have the habit of 

doing it now!!” 

Question: What is one thing you will bring 

from Wooster to college with you? 

THE GENERAL 

Student Voice of Wooster 

is published by the students of 

Wooster School 

91 Miry Brook Rd 

Danbury, CT 06810 

www.woosterschool.org 

JONNY SVENNINGSEN ’08 

“Mr. Hackett's crazy jokes.” 

DENNIS MORAN ’08 

“Grace took mine. I’M the 

grounds captain. Not you. I 

always pass trash on the street 

and look around for a 

garbage can to put it in.” 

BEN LEIB ’08 

“Far more collared shirts than 

I can possibly use for the rest 

of my life.” 

VANESSA C-ROY ’08 

“A distaste for stuffed shells.” 

Wooster School is an independent, college 

preparatory, coeducational, day school for 

students in K-12. 

Founded in 1926. 

Please feel free to contact THE GENERAL at: 

the.wooster.general@gmail.com

2008 June - Wooster School

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