NIST e-NEWS(Vol 80, April 15, 2012)

SAT SAYS: The Last Hooray!!!
Mr. Kewal Krishna, B. Tech., 8 th Sem., Team e_news
It’s time you take out your kerchiefs. Its time you find a shoulder to weep on. Its time you
dive in nostalgia. Its time you savor every word you read. Its time for your beloved, your
champion, your voice to fizz out. The time has come for SAT to die...
Well not just yet. How can SAT depart before giving one of SAT’s famous preaching? Didn’t you all enjoy
those monologues- sometimes rude, sometimes catchy, sometimes biased, sometimes even racist but
always true and insightful. In this final issue SAT won’t do any of that but rather take you through a trip
down memory lane. SAT started out as an acronym for satire. “Satire on Attire”, the first trumpet, though
naive, was well appreciated by you all. Thank You. Students personally came up to the so-called-creator of
SAT, Kewal Krishna (however SAT, has already made it clear in earlier issues that Kewal is just a medium.
SAT is nothing but that voice within you that begs attention but is always unheard and ignored) and
thanked him for writing something related to the students of this college and not about world economics
and politics. Who reads them anyway? From there it became a mandate for SAT. SAT’s sayings would
always then be related to the student fraternity.
Next in the series was, “P for Placements”. It was the only occasion when you all wanted to follow the
placement department’s advice sincerely. Well almost sincerely, except when it came to attending the PPTs
or bringing in a photo attached CV or wearing a tie. “Strike it out” was the next memorandum wherein SAT
urged the student fraternity to strike against the university strike. The semesters are 3 months and the
exams, Dear Lord, are 2 months long. It can happen only in our dear BPUT. “Waka Waka” was where SAT
brought to you the April fool’s joke played on all Indians by Shakira (now this is where “O la la” fits.
Listening Bappi da? Not Vidya, Shakira), that Waka Waka was the FIFA world cup theme. It actually meant
Wake and Whack for us Indians. Wake up from the dream of 3.25 package and whack out the depravity
prevailing in the country by becoming IASs, politicians, policemen and so on. “The death of GOD” was a
correspondence form He Himself requesting you all to let secularism prevail. SAT does not deny the fact
that it was an opportunistic time to say so as this all took place in the wake of the judgment of the Babri
demolition. Then the Golden period came for SAT where SAT’s popularity rose and rose and rose. (It’s no
secret that SAT likes to brag)
“NIST leaks” based on Wiki leaks were received with great appreciation. That Sagar Xerox’s methods were
monopolistic or that the faculty was also tired of taking classes were all revealed in this cable. “V day”
made fun of girls and their unreal desire for perfect love and the more perplexing one, soft toys. It also
showed how boys spend their mess bills to get those teddies and chocolates. SAT continued the tradition
in “International Men’s Day” demanding a day in recognition of the opposite’s opposite gender. Men duh...
Don’t you hate it when a girl gets ahead of you in the queue and gets the last available tickets of your
favorite movie? How often do you have to get up in a bus or train so that the pretty lady there can be
seated? Don’t you despise the fact that you have to carry around the entire luggage whenever you are
traveling? And how often have you to pay the bill just because you don’t put a lipstick or a suns crème or
mascara…the list can go on and on and on….It was then that SAT proposed a day for the anger amongst
peace, for the greed amongst sacrifice, for the ruthless amongst love, for the problem amongst solution.
How about an INTERNATIONAL MEN’s DAY on the 30 th of FEBRUARY because that’s how the dark and
handsome had turned dark to the women in their life for the past thousands of years- oblivious to their
needs and butchers of their desires. SAT’s last gig featuring the fairer sex was “A or I” where SAT unearthed
an interesting phenomena that 87.5% of the girls studying at NIST from its inception have had a name
ending with, yeah you guessed it right, an “a” or an “i”. After this SAT brought before you “Resolutions
2012” where SAT tactfully showed that the resolution of every boy was to get a girl and that of girls were
to get slim, to get fairer, and to buy clothes… SAT was brought to you the resolutions of famous personalities
like that of the man with the turban having a resolution of making one decision on his own.
It has been a great journey. The love and support you extended mesmerized SAT and SAT always
acknowledged them in the issues. THANK YOU. Now it’s time to say the goodbyes. SAT hopes you would
remember SAT as SAT would always remember you.
National Institute of Science & Technology, Berhampur, 761008 20 of 22