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Download The Pharos Winter 2008 Edition - Alpha Omega Alpha

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A Tribute to Medical Stereotypes<br />

A doctor’s a person, some short and<br />

some tall,<br />

Some have brown hair or blonde hair<br />

or no hair at all.<br />

Some are black, some are white, some<br />

are Vietnamese,<br />

Some allergic to nuts, some intolerant<br />

of cheese.<br />

Some doctors are nice and some<br />

doctors are mean,<br />

And a whole bunch of doctors are<br />

right in between.<br />

But stereotypes do exist, and I’m not<br />

an apologist—<br />

<strong>The</strong>re’s a distinct type of person for<br />

each type of -ologist.<br />

Orthopods are jocks, and<br />

nephrologists nerds,<br />

GI guys are for some reason interested<br />

in turds.<br />

Endocrinologists are very cerebral,<br />

OB-GYNs, enough attitude to fill a<br />

cathedral.<br />

Psychiatrists have issues, and write<br />

really long notes.<br />

Dermatologists like sunscreen and<br />

buy really fast boats.<br />

Radiologists and pathologists are an<br />

interesting bunch,<br />

<strong>The</strong>y either don’t like windows or<br />

patients too much.<br />

Pediatricians are kooky, but patient<br />

and warm.<br />

ER docs are crazy, but serene in a<br />

storm.<br />

Surgeons are pompous, but<br />

talented, too.<br />

So, you medical students, which<br />

stereotype are you?<br />

Daniel Shumer<br />

Mr. Shumer is a member of the Class of<br />

<strong>2008</strong> at the Feinberg School of Medicine of<br />

Northwestern University. His address is: 1050<br />

W. Roscoe #2, Chicago, Illinois 60657. E-mail:<br />

dshumer@md.northwestern.edu.<br />

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