Sleep-out raises awareness - Indiana University Southeast
Sleep-out raises awareness - Indiana University Southeast
Sleep-out raises awareness - Indiana University Southeast
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Week of April 20, 2009 Diversions The Horizon • Page 7<br />
Comments?<br />
Send them to<br />
horizon@ius.edu<br />
Time-Wasting Web Sites<br />
HTTP://HOMEPAGES.IUS.EDU/HORIZON/TWWS.HTML<br />
• http://www.oddee.com/item_96627.aspx<br />
• http://lab.andre-michelle.com/swf/fl10/ToneMatrix.swf<br />
• http://listverse.com/<br />
• http://www.iheartchaos.com/<br />
• http://repairpal.com/<br />
• http://rightwingnews.com/mt331/2009/04/50_things_every_18yearold_shou.php<br />
• http://www.mikeadair.com/David%27sNewSnail.swf<br />
• http://sovietrussia.org/f/src/tetoris.swf<br />
• http://balldroppings.com/js/<br />
• http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/04/hot_girls_have_lightsaber_strip-fight_for_your.php<br />
By Scott Gillespie / tsgilles@ius.edu<br />
By SAMANTHA WEAVER<br />
(c) 2009 King Features Synd.,<br />
Inc.<br />
• It was humorist and commentator<br />
Andy Rooney (of<br />
“60 Minutes” fame) who<br />
made the following sage observation:<br />
“Making duplicate<br />
copies and computer print<strong>out</strong>s<br />
of things no one wanted<br />
even one of in the first place<br />
is giving America a new<br />
sense of purpose.”<br />
• The next time you find<br />
yourself picking up a complimentary<br />
toothpick on<br />
your way <strong>out</strong> of a restaurant,<br />
you might want to consider<br />
this fact: More Americans<br />
choke on toothpicks than on<br />
any other item.<br />
• At one time in Corpus<br />
Christi, Texas, city leaders<br />
saw fit to make it illegal for<br />
an individual to raise alligators<br />
in his or her home.<br />
• If you’re a man, you might<br />
be surprised to learn that in<br />
a survey that was conducted<br />
recently, more than 40 percent<br />
of women in the United<br />
States admitted that they<br />
would wear a stylish shoe<br />
even if it were uncomfortable.<br />
If you’re a woman, you<br />
might be surprised that the<br />
figure was only 40 percent.<br />
• Resources are very scarce<br />
in space, so it’s important to<br />
conserve wherever possible.<br />
The astronauts on the International<br />
Space Station might<br />
be going a bit far, however;<br />
it’s been reported that they<br />
change their underwear only<br />
every three or four days in<br />
order to cut down on laundry.<br />
• Those who study such<br />
things say that the average<br />
grocery store today carries<br />
approximately 30,000 different<br />
items — that’s more than<br />
twice as many items as those<br />
stores carried 20 years ago.<br />
• A couple of years ago,<br />
Mariah Carey — the American<br />
singer, songwriter,<br />
actress and, not incidentally,<br />
pitch woman for Gillette’s<br />
“Legs of a Goddess” ad campaign<br />
— insured her legs for<br />
$1 billion.<br />
•—•<br />
Thought for the Day: “Writing<br />
is the only profession<br />
where no one considers you<br />
ridiculous if you earn no<br />
money.” — Jules Renard<br />
Completely Made-Up<br />
Horoscopes<br />
ARIES (March 21 to April<br />
19) I believe I have seen this<br />
before. It is called a case of<br />
extreme boredom with a side<br />
of slaw.<br />
TAURUS (April 20 to<br />
May 20) Because of Saturn<br />
rising in Taurus, you will<br />
be stuck in a loop of neverending<br />
nothingness — like<br />
last Tuesday.<br />
GEMINI (May 21 to June<br />
20) I have seen the future,<br />
and it smells like ketchup.<br />
Yummy!<br />
CANCER (June 21 to July<br />
22) Sometimes it is best not<br />
to understand or even try.<br />
This is called “saving your<br />
sanity.”<br />
LEO (July 23 to Aug. 22)<br />
It’s OK to be weird if those<br />
around you are weird in the<br />
exact same way. That way,<br />
it’s not so weird, is it?<br />
VIRGO (Aug. 23 to Sept.<br />
22) A bunch of posters,<br />
even large ones, with the<br />
university’s “core values”<br />
and “mission statement” on<br />
them, will not necessarily<br />
assure reaccreditation. Do<br />
what other universities do:<br />
paint the halls and bribe the<br />
evaluators.<br />
LIBRA (Sept. 23 to Oct.<br />
22) Relax. The economy is<br />
fine. The Wal-Mart parking<br />
lot is still full. People still<br />
drive their SUVs too fast. The<br />
line around McDonald’s is<br />
still around McDonald’s. Be<br />
at peace.<br />
SCORPIO (Oct. 23 to<br />
Nov. 21) When it’s late at<br />
night and you are feeling, er,<br />
“lonely,” you think of me,<br />
don’t you? I knew it.<br />
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22<br />
to Dec. 21) As an IUS student,<br />
you are not allowed to<br />
say, “Peace <strong>out</strong>, yo!” Evar.<br />
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22<br />
to Jan. 19) OK, I’m sick of<br />
having a ham sandwich<br />
every day from the IUS Food<br />
Court. Can’t you make graband-go<br />
sandwiches with<br />
some other type of meat?<br />
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 to<br />
Feb. 18) Nature isn’t our<br />
mother, it’s our sister — a<br />
mean, selfish, hateful sister.<br />
PISCES (Feb. 19 to March<br />
20) You don’t see many<br />
“Baby On Board” signs<br />
anymore. You do see a lot of<br />
“Baby On Roof Rack” signs,<br />
though.<br />
Crossword<br />
Answers<br />
Recycle Me!<br />
In 2000, not a single hurricane made landfall in the United States.