Suspense Magazine November 2012

to do. Jason was growing up, and had started elementary
school. She didn’t want to uproot him again. She didn’t
want him to be a child of divorce, with all the baggage that
was supposed to contain. She watched the years go by as if
watching a stranger’s life. It was something like being held
under a clogged and swollen stream, immersed, with no way
to be released.
She told herself that she could handle Ian’s affairs as long
as he didn’t let Jason find out. However, when Jason was
seven and home sick from school, Rhonda came home to find
Jason in bed asleep, and Ian and another student in his and
Rhonda’s bedroom. They were definitely NOT asleep. Once
again, the car was packed, and once again, they returned to
Pennsylvania. This time, Rhonda filed for divorce.
The divorce was nearly final when Ian again came to visit.
Finally, after many weeks of such visits, he wore her down. It
would be better for Jason to have two parents at home. He—
Ian—realized he had a problem. He would get counseling,
go to church, whatever she wanted. He told her he loved her,
and wanted her back. And because something in Rhonda
still wanted to believe, she and her son returned. That had
been…six months before.
Rhonda again considered this odd place where she lay,
and wondered where she was. It was such a strange place.
There was no sound, no smell…no, there was a smell. A musty
smell…something like dried herbs. Just then, she moved her
other hand and found the source. Leaves, crinkly leaves.
It reminded her of Regell.
Regell moved next door to them the week after she
and Jason returned home. At first, Ian seemed to like her,
then he didn’t. Regell was—for lack of a better word—a
modern hippie. She had written books about herbs and
herbal remedies. She grew a huge herb garden and sold her
plants. She taught a class at the community college about the
medicinal properties of the plants she nurtured and grew.
She wore kimonos everywhere, although she was not Asian.
When gardening, she wore jeans, with big holes torn
out of them. She reminded Rhonda of a young Grace Slick.
She had the same flowing, black hair, the same exotic blue
eyes, and the same larger than life personality. She drove an
antique MG midget, with Deadhead and Co-exist stickers
plastered on the back. Her personalized licensed plate was an
abbreviation of her favorite Doors song, L.A. Woman.
Regell was friendly to all…except Ian. When she looked
his way, Rhonda saw what she thought was a kind of contempt
on her face. Despite his charms, Regell seemed immune. And
Ian couldn’t stand it.
“I’d really like it if you wouldn’t talk to that woman so
much, babe,” Ian commented one night over supper.
“That woman Oh…Regell” Rhonda said. “I really don’t
that much. She shares some of her herbs with me. In fact that
salad you liked so much just now. Several of her herbs were
in it. Makes it delicious.”
Ian raised an eyebrow, “I’m surprised she isn’t raising
weed over there. I wonder what the cops would find if
someone tipped them.”
“Oh, you wouldn’t!” Rhonda had protested. “Why don’t
you like her, Ian She’s nice to me. She adores Jason. She just
made him cookies the other day…”
“I don’t want my son near her!” Ian said sharply, his voice
nearly a shout. “You keep him away from her, you hear”
“Ian, I…don’t understand…”
“Just hear me on that. You keep him away!”
Years before, such a tone would have intimidated her.
Two separations and a growing gulf between them had given
her strength.
“No, Ian.” She said firmly.
“What do you mean, no” He challenged.
“Just that. No! He’s my son too. I see no harm in him
going over there. She’s my friend. Until I see reason to change
that, he can go.”
Ian stood up abruptly, causing the table to tip then fall
heavily.
“She will cause trouble in this marriage! I’ve known her
kind before. Men-hating wretches!”
“Why do you think she’s a woman hater, Ian” Rhonda
asked gently. “Has she turned you down”
The two stared at each other for a time, and then Ian
slammed out of the house, not coming back until the next
afternoon. When he came back, it was as if nothing happened.
Again, Rhonda let the sleepy feeling overcome her. It would
be so easy to completely give into it, to just rest here, languidly,
forever. Yet, the smell of the leaves kept pricking the sleepy state,
bringing her back to wakefulness.
It could have been two days ago…maybe two years.
She didn’t know. All she knew was the next thing that came
after the fight about Regell. She’d been sitting in the garden
with her, drinking tea flavored with mint julep and watching
Jason play with Regell’s Persian cat, Terry. She confided Ian’s
unfaithfulness to her, and Regell listened, yet never offered
advice. This day, she finally did.
“He’s not going to change, you know,” she said, gently.
“For him to change, it would take something to totally
rock his world. Something to show him how selfish he is.
Something to make him hate his behavior so much that he’d
be willing to do anything to change it.
“Right now, he’s got everything his way. He’s got you as
his wife, willing to put up with his games, ready to be his
party host at any moment, and he’s got this cute little boy
who adores him, but is afraid to talk to him. Have you
noticed They never play ball out in the yard. What do they
do together”
“Well,” Rhonda said uncomfortably. “They, ah talk about
things. Ian tells him about the classes he teaches. Tells him
about literary events that shaped…”
Regell stopped her by laughing harshly, “You’ve got
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